Runaway
by Shilyn
Summary: Companion to With Our Arms Wide Open. Naraku is long since dead. Sess has taken an adult Rin as his lover. But their pups will be infertile hanyous. When Sess takes an inuyoukai wife Rin runs to the only other family she has...Inuyasha. Normal pairings
1. Prologue: Beginnings and Endings

**A/N:** As you read this later, Ginrei is told to recount her parentage. She's telling names based on the manner I invented in _With Our Arms Wide Open_. In that system (a demon system for tracking who's related to who) the first name of one's father is adopted as the surname. So Inuyasha and Sesshomaru share the same last name: Inutaisho. Daughters do the same, but they can take either their father's name or their mate's name later. So when Ginrei says Shizumeru Giri was her mother she means Giri was her mother, Shizumeru was her mother's father. And so on and so forth. …Probably that doesn't help any but oh well, I did try…WARNING I'm not like proofreading this and I wrote it fast, mistakes are likely. Please forgive me, I was over eager.

Disclaimer: I do not own Sesshomaru. I do not own Rin. However, Ginrei is my creation. So is Tsukiyume and Shimofuri and Sasugainu. And I am proud of them :)

**Runaway**

* * *

This story is one that begins in war and tragedy. For those of you who are new to this series this is the semi-sequel to _"With Our Arms Wide Open."_ And that story is the sequel to _"So Much For The Hanyou's Happy Ending."_ To understand this storyline completely I would tell you read and review (because I am a review whore!) those stories first, but in case you just aren't interested I will take pity and provide the basic **summaries:** Naraku is dead and gone. In the years since then Sesshomaru has trained and raised Rin and eventually taken her as his mate. But having children with her means he has hanyous, and hanyous are infertile because they are hybrids. (Go look it up, I'm not kidding.) He must marry an inuyoukai to have heirs for the Western Lands. (All this was learned in _So Much for the Hanyou's Happy Ending.)_

Sesshomaru hates the dog demon clan. He will not negotiate a marriage through them, so he finds another way. There is a civil war in the Middle Lands between different families in the clan. The old leader Nishiyori is leading a rebellion against Taikokajin (who just died) and her young heir Shimofuri (shishi-sama). Sesshomaru offers to help Shimofuri and Sasugainu (Shimofuri's uncle) in this war, but for a price. Nishiyori's land (the Isei province) is to become part of the Western Lands after the war is finished, AND one of Nishiyori's female relatives will be spared from death and given to Sesshomaru as his wife. (All this was from _With Our Arms Wide Open.)_ But the question on everyone's mind is...what does Rin think about this? Does she even know? And with that thought I will shut up!

* * *

**Prologue: Beginnings and Endings**

Ginrei had never imagined it would come down to this. She'd woken in the night to shouts, screams, and the roar of fire. It took root with amazing speed—a speed she suspected was partially not-normal, resulting from a spell of some kind to aid the flame—and swept through the palace. By the time she'd woken the fire had already reached the hall outside of her sleeping chamber.

She could remember, faintly, the dark silhouetted forms and shadows rushing about and around the flames, her mother, her aunt, her sisters and younger brothers, all of the women or the pups still too young to fight. They scrambled over one another blindly, driven by their fear, searching for an exit.

But the fire had already taken the hallway; there was no other clear way out. Smoke poured into the room, Ginrei heard one of her sisters hacking, struggling to breathe.

She crawled forward, searching for her sisters, her mother, her cousins. "Mother! Giniro! Kanbi! Chiwa!" she grasped someone and rolled him over searching for his face through the thick, burning air. It was one of her cousins, a young male, too young to join his kin on the battlefield. His face was gray, his eyes wide and lifeless. The grit covered his body everywhere.

"Ransou…" she spoke his name to herself while around her the entire palace began to collapse.

He was the first casualty that she saw, but he was far, far from being the last.

She caught sight of her older sister, Giniro, slashing at the walls of their sleeping chamber, bursting out of them and into the room beyond. But that room had also been invaded by the fire, and as Giniro's claws opened up the wall the fire leapt up at her like an overzealous lover. Ginrei felt a wave of heat when the hole was made, and the roaring in her ears increased. Giniro fell backwards and did not get back up.

Without looking at her, Ginrei knew that her older sister was dead. Yet as soon as she knew this terrible thing she had to dismiss it and think fast for herself, or soon she too would die.

She crawled toward a different wall, one that she knew was closer to the outside, to the cool, sweet night air outside the palace…she stumbled up onto her feet, feeling the heat of the fire at her back, the sudden cold of her tears as they coursed down her face. The light from the fire danced wildly, sometimes so bright that it hurt her eyes, other times dimming so that she had to squint. She pounded on the door, and faintly heard herself screaming…

A shadow appeared over the flicker of the flames on the wall, someone had stepped in front of the light. Ginrei whirled, tears streaming from her irritated eyes. The source of the shadow was a tall, lithe inuyoukai, a soldier. Armor covered his shoulders, thighs, and chest. There was a helmet on his head, laced with metal. It shone, sparkling brilliantly in the flickering firelight of the burning palace.

It did not occur to her to fear him—he was a male, he would help her…she threw herself down at his feet, half-bowing half-sobbing. The soldier knelt and snatched up her arm, throwing her lightly over one shoulder. She clung to him for dear life, closing her eyes and fighting the nausea awakening within her.

The soldier did not leave immediately. He stalked through the fiery room, seemingly fearless, and found another cowering female form. Kneeling, he scooped her up as well and flung her over his other shoulder. When Ginrei risked opening her eyes she saw the smeared, dirtied face of her cousin, Kanbi. The tears carved pathways of white through the black grit on their cheeks as they clung helplessly to the male that had saved them.

He toured the room, searching for others. He came across an older female, coughing, half dead already. He drew his sword and in the space of an eye blink he slit her neck. She fell flat. The stink of the fire hid the stench of blood and death.

There were other soldiers in the room, Ginrei saw. They too had women thrown over their backs, slung there like sacks of rice or sugar. As the smoke slowly began to fill her head, Ginrei let her eyes close, giving up…

And then the soldier leapt high into the air, jolting Ginrei and her cousin Kanbi wide awake. They crashed through the roof into the second story. Ginrei caught sight of the other inuyoukai soldiers doing the same. They leapt in unison, well trained, flying like birds of prey. They crashed onto the floorboards and shouted as one, chanting, rushing for the walls. Ginrei cringed, holding tight.

The soldiers smashed into the walls, breaking the wood wide apart with a _crack!_ Cold, sweet air filled Ginrei's next breath. Her heart swelled despite the tragedy still unfolding around her. _I'm going to live!_

The soldier hit the ground hard. Both girls were jarred, making their bodies limp and flimsy as the solider hefted them free of his shoulders and dropped them carelessly onto the ground.

As Ginrei blinked, slowly recovering, she saw that she and Kanbi were in a long line of women, all of them young, some barely out of childhood. Some were already dying, their necks snapped in the solders' ungentle rescue. If, indeed, it could even be called a rescue. More men, some of them only human, were appearing out of the trees, from inside the burning house, from the ransacked gardens…

The whole earth seemed to be burning before Ginrei's eyes. She stared at the palace until it blurred in her vision and the lump of grief swelled in her throat, making it hard for her to breathe.

But the torture had not yet ended with the burning and destruction of her home. It had only just begun.

Three inuyoukai stepped forward toward one end of the line of women rescued from the palace's burning innards. One was shorter than the others, a soldier with an outline of a snake, she thought. He had a tiny but very sharp nose. The other two lords were hardly distinguishable. They were proud shapes; Ginrei suspected they were proper royalty.

The three stopped at the first girl and Ginrei's sharp ears picked out what he said to her, "Your heritage, girl. Now."

She answered and there was a pause as the narrow, pointy-nose man thought this answer over, and then he made a curt motion with his fingers. The other two inuyoukai stepped forward, drawing their swords at once. The girl screamed—once—and then fell over dead, her head rolling separately from her body.

The other women tried to bolt around Ginrei—those that were able that was—but other inuyoukai stepped forward and forced them back into the line. Ginrei felt herself shaking; she looked to Kanbi and saw that her cousin was crying, sobbing.

The pointy-nose youkai reached the next girl, sniffing. "This one was mated." At that the soldiers behind him moved forward, executing her without word or warning. Again the line quivered with women fluttering, trying to seek an escape. The roar of the fire robbed Ginrei, in her panic, of hearing. She let her head sink forward and started to sob, remembering her older sister, her cousin Ransou, so many others that she would never really know the fate of…

The pointy nosed youkai had reached Kanbi at her side, she realized. Again he asked her, "Who were your parents?"

Kanbi was quivering uncontrollably, but her eyes were defiant as she stared up at the men.

"Stubborn bitch," the youkai cackled a little in his sneaky voice. "Tell me or you'll die for insubordination." As if to emphasize, the youkai soldiers behind him lifted their swords, which were already covered, dripping with blood.

"My mother was Koganeiro Keisei, my father is Onshoku Nishiyori."

The strange youkai paused, eyes narrowing, as he seemed to consider this information. Kanbi waited, holding her breath, staring up at them, awaiting her fate. At last he flicked a finger and sighed as the youkai behind him rushed forward, slashing as one with their swords even as Kanbi cringed and tried to crawl away…

Ginrei watched, feeling sick to her stomach by the stench of blood already rising from the slaughter down the line. She saw the soldiers shuffle forward as if it were a dance, their boots crunching over the hard crusted snow…

Their swords sang through the air, striking like snakes. Kanbi cried out once, calling for mercy, for admission to heaven, no one would even know. A moment later there was silence and Ginrei gagged on the thick scent of her cousin's blood. A massive pool of it stained the snow, sucked hungrily down into it.

Ginrei stared at her fingers, pale and white and trembling. She gagged, heaving and sobbing at once, but nothing came out of her stomach, her throat closed over it as the pointy-nosed youkai stepped close at last.

It was her turn to answer his question and get her head chopped off. She didn't have the courage that Kanbi had had to look the monster in the eye. Her fingers were against the freezing snow, but she was so traumatized she could not feel even the slightest thing from them.

The youkai scowled at her. "She's fair. I thought all of Nishiyori's bitches were like him, blue-black everything."

It was true; Ginrei had inherited her mother's silver-colored hair. It was slightly darker than the true lighter colors of some members of the Inuyoukai clan, but it was a rare trait within Nishiyori's family. She also had been lucky enough to inherit her mother's eyes, not quite blue, but paler than that still, more silver, like the shine from a lake in bright sunlight. Her rare features were helped, of course, by the fact that her father had not been Nishiyori, but in fact his youngest half brother.

"She will certainly be related to him." One of the inuyoukai with the swords grunted.

Pointy nose hushed the soldiers, focusing solely on Ginrei. "Your parents, girl. Who were they?"

She was shaking, wringing her hands together now. "My m-mother was Shizumeru Giri. F-father was Onshoku Seiyo."

Again there was the pause from the man above her, a torturous wait as he decided whether she lived or died by whatever mysterious criteria he was trying to fulfill.

Finally he ended her wait, asking, "Shizumeru Giri. Tell me about your mother's family."

Ginrei was robbed of her voice, she stuttered, still wringing her hands, her tears fell into the snow as she fought nausea. "Shi-Shizu-Shizumeru was the son of Shikaku and Mei Qi…"

"The mainland." Pointy nose grunted. "Your ancestors go back to the mainland."

The moment was tense, so tight Ginrei felt as if her ribs were going to collapse inward. She cringed, her clawed fingers scratching convulsively on the crusty snow beneath her. _How could this happen…? What's going on…?_ But logic and sense had long since fled the world. Her mind was lagging behind, having difficulty dealing with reality even as it plunged forward and buried her uncaringly beneath its weight.

She saw her long, straight silvered hair, sliding past her shoulders, touching the snow around her. _I was supposed to have a future…_ Nishiyori, not her father but her uncle, had ordered her education as an artist, a calligrapher, a scholar. Her father, Seiyo, had assigned her a physical trainer in the fall. She could remember the faces of her family members, her mother, her sisters, her father and uncle Nishiyori. They seemed like something out of a dream, an illusion that she had made to escape the horror happening outside her mind.

_Are they all dead now?_ And as she wondered this most terrible possibility—its horrible likelihood—the pointy nosed inuyoukai grunted again and made the motion with his fingers, signaling that she would die.

Ginrei closed her eyes, bent lower to the ground. _I'll be with you soon._ She thought fleetingly of Kanbi, of her bravery. _You are already in paradise, cousin…_

And then the cold night air was filled with feminine wails. Sharp, high-pitched, sickening. At first Ginrei thought the sound was somehow a signal that she had in fact died. The nip of the soldier's blades was so swift that she'd felt no pain at all and was not even aware of dying, of her blood leaching out onto the snow. Now the screams were the agonizing call of her dead female kin, all of them still shocked and in pain at the surprise of their own deaths. Some had died burning, in their sleep. Others when the soldier inuyoukai appeared in the smoky ruins of their bedroom and slit open their throats.

And then the spell was broken as something blazingly warm and wet splattered onto Ginrei's face, making her gasp and fall to one side. Her hands and arms landed in a cold, thick puddle. She opened her eyes and found herself half-lying in a pool of rich, dark red blood. Kanbi's scent rushed to meet her from it and Ginrei reeled away, choking and gagging with physical revulsion and horror.

She cried wordlessly, seeing only blood. Blood everywhere, on her arms, on her once innocent white sleeping robe, on her pale-skinned hands, in her silvered hair…

A boot slurped through the blood, nudging against her legs. "Are you wounded girl?"

The horror within her turned into a sick, cold rage. Twisting within her like a snake made of ice. The cold night air touched her lungs, filled with the scents of pain and terror and death—all the deaths of her innocent female kin. She stared at the boot with widened eyes, slowly but surely feeling something growing within her, shifting, writhing, spreading its powerful legs…

The whites of her eyes changed color, becoming suddenly red and her mouth fell open in a grisly grin of fanged teeth.

One of the inuyoukai soldiers cursed and suddenly there were a lot more booted feet around her. "She's gone into shock—knock the stupid bitch out."

"No!" a younger, gentler voice broke through. The feet shuffled, moving aside to let someone pass through. Ginrei was still trying to transform.

Her body was shaking; her clawed fingers had changed shape, melding more together into the shape of a paw. A fine white coat of hair had started to sprout over her skin. She had never called on her true form before, not since she'd been a pup anyway. The transformation was nearly beyond her control, an instinctual reaction to give her the added size, strength, and weapons—teeth and claws—to escape the danger she'd been thrust into. But the change itself frightened her. Ginrei huddled into herself, trying to stop it and at once unable and unwilling to.

A different set of boots appeared in her vision. They were more expertly crafted, better cared for, richer and expensive. He was nobility—but Ginrei didn't have the presence of mind to notice this. She saw boots, and boots were what the soldiers had worn as they carted her out of the burning palace, as they slaughtered the older females, as they cut off the heads of Kanbi, of her other innocent kin…

She lifted her eyes, abruptly snarling. Her transformation continued, warping her human-like face into a dog's snout. Her snarl revealed sharp, white fangs. Her dog ears were more upright than was normal among the true forms in most of the dog demon clan. (Sesshomaru if I recall in true form has floppy ears like my Labrador Retriever. Imagine Ginrei has the upright, pointy ears of a coyote or a wolf. Her ancestry goes back to the mainland, presumably China. So she is a mix of new and different genes, and thus, a different appearance.)

When she leapt toward the new booted inuyoukai, snarling and slashing at him wildly, he was already ready for her. She collided with another dog, her silver fur bright like the snow against the other inuyoukai's blue-gray coat. Neither had transformed into huge forms, both were still not quite in their prime, and neither knowingly tried to attain their full, massive size. Instead they were bear-sized beasts, leaping and snarling at one another's throat.

The soldiers around them, human as well as youkai, withdrew at the shouts from another general, this one fair-haired and blue-eyed. The bodies of the dead—and there were many, many of them, dozens of decapitated, bleeding inuyoukai women—were hauled away, leaving wide swathes of blood in their wake. An entire army circled just inside the gardens of the palace, making the place swarm in the shadows, like an entire nest of human-sized ants.

Ginrei snapped her jaws, tearing ruthlessly into her blue-gray furred opponent. He bared his teeth with the pain and fresh, male blood splattered the snow. The couple twisted. The male used his shoulders and paws, pushing and tripping Ginrei until the inexperienced female let go and stumbled dizzily away. She had little strength for the fight and no experience. Only rage and grief fueled her and the male was cautious, cunning.

She leapt at him again, slashing with her paws this time. The male dodged her and then, once she'd rushed past him, only to trip and slide on the bloody snow, he made his move. With his heavier, firmer bulk, as well as the aid of experience and training, he pinned her to the snow. Ginrei fought him, barking, snarling, howling, but the male did not relent.

At long last the inuyoukai female's strength gave out. She was conquered. Exhaustion took hold of her and slowly, her form wavered and shrunk, twisting. When at last the transformation was finished, Ginrei lied in her torn robes once more, covered by the blood of her female kin, breathing very slowly. Her face was covered by her silver hair, now matted and a mess. She did not sob, she did not cry, merely waited.

The male at last moved away from her. She watched his powerful blue-gray paws bitterly until even that emotion fled from her. At last she closed her eyes just as the paws disappeared; turning again into the boots she'd seen before.

"Lord Shimofuri." Someone called and the male that had fought Ginrei into submission turned to face the small, mortal man rushing toward him.

"What is it?"

The human bowed, "The army reports there are no more women alive in the castle or on the grounds that they can find."

Shimofuri nodded slowly. His face was grim, a fresh layer of grime was there, and a few smears of red-brown blood from his fight. "Wait here." He commanded and then turned his head, searching with his blue-gray eyes through the darkness. There was still a ring of soldiers standing about the edges of the garden, watching to see if there would be another execution or if there would be another fight. Many were human and grinning, enjoying the carnage in their own sick delight. Seeing the inuyoukai women die did not bother them in the least after the months of bloody campaigning against Nishiyori's invading armies.

The male inuyoukai intermixed with them, however, were cold and stoic, though tinges of bitterness might have been seen in the depths of their gazes. The women that had died were the enemy's kin. It was a necessary death, but it was one without honor. And worst of all was the plight of the chosen one, the lone survivor that Shimofuri had had to battle to submission.

At last Shimofuri caught sight of the pointy-nosed youkai, the scholar he'd hired. He strode forward over the crusted, bloody snow. "Chinouteki."

The scholar bowed, "Lord Shimofuri." Chinouteki had been hired for his knowledge of the clan's genealogies. He had often been charged with arranging difficult marriages within the clan. The inuyoukai of Japan were strongly interbred with one another. There were a thousand and one cousins each lord had. Careful precautions were often needed to ensure that the clan remained unrelated enough to continue on into the future. Chinouteki was just one of many such scholars trained in this way.

"Is this the right girl?" he tried to keep the scowl of doubt off his face. The stink of blood was making him sick. "She's fair, like Lord Sesshomaru. Surely they are related…"

Chinouteki had very sneaky, slanted eyes that unnerved the young demon lord as he spoke, "Shimofuri-sama has nothing to worry about. This girl is completely unrelated to Sesshomaru-sama."

"How can that be?" Shimofuri didn't bother disguising the challenge in his voice. He wanted the explanation, not the reassurances.

"She is not Lord Nishiyori's daughter. She is Onshoku Seiyo's offspring instead. Lord Onshoku was unrelated for the most part to Inutaisho's line. Lord Seiyo's mother was also completely unrelated, but Lord Nishiyori's mother was a relative of Lord Inutaisho's father. On the girl's mother's side she is completely unrelated. Her ancestors go back to the mainland."

"Was she the only one unrelated?" Shimofuri asked, slowly.

Chinouteki quailed slightly, blinking and taking a step back. "I do not know, Shimofuri-sama. She was the first we found who's father was not Lord Nishiyori…"

"You killed them all without checking for another first?" Nausea had tightened Shimofuri's guts. _All of the waste. We might've found other males who would want a wife from them. They could have lived…and what if this girl is related to Sesshomaru after all? _He looked back at the girl in the snow. Her hair was so light, her eyes light as well. How could she _not_ be apart of Inutaisho's line? There were only so many persistent families with fair hair…

Chinouteki's answer made Shimofuri want abruptly to tear the scholar's throat out: "The rest were useless—we only needed one of Lord Nishiyori's bitches."

Shimofuri emptied his face of expression, his body tightened as he fought his own anger. The blood rising from the snow, it was a lot like his own. Nishiyori was his great uncle, a close relative of his father, Haiseishoku. The females who'd died, spilling their blood into the earth; they were his own distant, innocent kin. He thought of Tsukiyume, his sister, locked away as a sort of hostage in Sesshomaru's castle. His fists clenched up.

"Shishi-sama?" Chinouteki asked.

Shimofuri turned his back on the scholar without answering and walked back stolidly to where he'd left the human, waiting for his message. "You." he barked. When the human sat up hurriedly, eyes bright with expectation, Shimofuri said, "Get one of the horses and ride for the Western Lands. You must deliver Lord Sesshomaru a message for me. Tell him we have succeeded and that we have a suitable bitch for him here. I will escort her myself."

The human nodded and then turned away, rushing off into the darkness, searching for a horse.

Shimofuri looked back at the girl lying in the snow and slowly his shoulders sagged with pity and a burgeoning despair for the loss that had happened in the whole of the war. _At least,_ he thought with an inward sigh, _it is over, for now._

* * *

Timing, it seemed in a sick, cruel way, was on his side.

Sesshomaru dismissed the human messenger coldly after hearing that Shimofuri and Sasugainu had succeeded—as he'd always known they would, with his help of course. There was no real news on the female they'd found for him. Sesshomaru was disturbed by his own anticipation of hearing more about her. It had been many, many years since he'd been close to another female inuyoukai of a suitable breeding age—and an unwed female at that. Only low females were allowed to fraternize without the guardianship of their fathers or brothers always watching over them. Daughters and sisters in a family were always the icing on the cakes of sealed alliances between families and great lands. It had been just that sort of union that had created Sesshomaru himself.

He had no expectations of loving, even liking the girl. Indeed, he expected that he would despise her. He would need to if he was to keep Rin happy with him.

Not, of course, that she was happy even _now,_ before she knew of his plans.

She might've learned ages ago what he was planning, quietly, without ever consulting her, if not for the latest miscarriage. Sesshomaru had lost count of the number of times Rin had conceived only to lose the child as her body rejected the foreign genetic material. Often the losses were something Rin didn't know about. To her it was a normal menstruation. She would begin her monthly bleed and be hidden away from him until it had finished. But Sesshomaru's nose was not fooled by this. Rin counted every miscarriage that she knew about, and the current number to her was something like five. Sesshomaru, however, knew it was two or _three_ times that number. Rin was very fertile, very receptive—but _not_ to his seed.

It perplexed him more than he ever cared to admit—why had Inutaisho so easily sired Inuyasha? Why had Inuyasha survived and reproduced but the great and powerful Sesshomaru could not sire a hanyou that was able to survive inside Rin's womb?

Already he knew one thing: he would almost never have a hnayou son. Every one of Rin's earliest miscarriages, the ones that she never knew were actually a loss, were males. He guessed this not truly because he could scent the change—it was too early for that—but more because all the later miscarriages, the five that Rin openly mourned and remembered so painfully, had all been female. They were all his daughters—so where were the sons? Sesshomaru knew they were the unknown babies. Unseen and unremembered except by his own nose.

It was partially these losses, the blood washing away his unborn children, which had driven Sesshomaru to make his plan with Sasugainu and Shimofuri. If all went well he would keep Rin and his wife-to-be separated from one another. Perhaps they would never meet one another at all…

He left the audience room, stopping in his dressing chambers to pick out black ceremonial robes—mourning robes. As the servant hustled about, adjusting the obi and the pants, straightening wrinkles, brushing away lint even if it was imaginary, Sesshomaru stared blandly at his reflection, still wondering.

There were images of his father, mostly in his true form. Grand, magnificent, and handsome. Sesshomaru knew he looked very much like his father, the great lord Inutaisho. But there were differences too. His nose was more like his mother's, his chin as well. And even his lips…he caught himself lifting his hand toward his face, noticed the servant staring up at him with momentary alarm. He diverted its course and touched his collar instead before giving a small grunt, telling the servant that he was satisfied.

The human hurried off, opening the sliding door and bowing as Sesshomaru slipped out of the room.

He paused outside of Rin's chambers, fighting the tension within him. A servant waited on him, hands poised to open the door. Sesshomaru could smell Rin already, her tears, her misery. This baby had lasted almost an entire four months within her. She had begun to hope, in spite of his cold warnings.

He flicked two fingers, the only small sign he gave before the servant opened the door.

He was startled to see that she was up, sitting at the edge of her futon, staring at the flickering firelight rising off the braziers. A servant tried to move around him, carrying tea that smelled strongly of medicinal herbs. Sesshomaru caught the small human woman with his one clawed hand and she froze, trying to bow though the teacups she'd brought jangled dangerously on her tray. "Lord Sesshomaru…"

On the edge of the futon Rin's dark haired head turned slightly, the long, slightly curly black hair rippling with her faintest movement. She did not speak, didn't make a sound, but Sesshomaru knew that she was aware of their presence. She was not completely withdrawn in her grief.

He took up the tray the servant was holding with his hand and pinned her with his golden gaze sternly. "Leave us."

She couldn't have left the room fast enough. "Lord S-seshomaru." She stuttered as she backed out of the room and slid the door closed behind her. Her footsteps disappeared, hurrying down the hallway.

Sesshomaru let out a slow sigh and then, slowly, moved forward to Rin. He knelt at her side, setting the tray in front of them both in one graceful movement. It was painfully apparent to them both that the way he had placed it was a disadvantage to himself. It was set to his left, closer to Rin than himself. His right hand—the only one he had left and the constant reminder of his little hanyou brother's surprising power—was too far away from the tray for him to reach for tea on his own without a very awkward stretch and turn.

Rin knew that he was quietly asking her to respond to him, to react. Even as a lover he was often a creature of very few words. Anger with her was more likely to get words than upset or grief or especially love.

She reached for the tray and turned the cups right side up and then began to pour Sesshomaru the medicinal tea—but nothing inside her own cup. When it was poured she pushed it slowly to Sesshomaru.

Now at last he spoke, "Rin. It is for you."

She looked straight ahead at the wall. Sesshomaru took the chance to examine her unabashedly. Her robes were a dull, ugly gray. She'd obviously chosen them to reflect her misery. Her hair had been combed and it shone brightly, almost gold in the light of the braziers. Someone else had combed it though, one of the maids or perhaps the hanyou girl Tsukiyume.

_It is morning,_ Sesshomaru realized,_ where is Tsukiyume?_ Usually his hanyou "hostage" visited with Rin in the mornings and early evenings, the two young women had grown fond of one another, as Sesshomaru had hoped they would. Perhaps Rin had dismissed her to go to her classes. It was another responsibility of the hanyou girl's, classes in all the arts, all the elements of education, and finally every style of fighting that she could stand. Sesshomaru wanted her educated, and he liked to see what she had learned from her fighting lessons. Were all hanyou as strong as Inuyasha in battle? Was there a secret strength in the survivors that Sesshomaru had never suspected? So far the hanyou girl hadn't given him an answer yet, and Rin had been cursed with miscarriages…

"I'm not hungry, Sesshomaru-sama."

He decided to be difficult. "You do not eat tea."

This at last drew a response. She turned and glared at him. Her eyes were a very deep color, a brown he supposed, but they often looked black. Most often it was when she was taken with desire for him, but they also appeared that way when filled to the brim with other emotions: bitterness, pain, loss…when she had been a child long ago he had often seen that expression when something would happen to make her remember the deaths of her family.

At last Rin reached for the tea and slowly poured herself a cup. As her hands released the tea kettle he caught them in his own, moving with a predatory swiftness that drew a gasp from Rin. He released one hand, pulling the one closest to him to grab hold of the tea cup in front of him. "Take this one as well." he ordered.

There was a hint of a frown on her face as her fingers closed around the cup and slowly pulled it back toward herself. She lifted it to her face and drank slowly, peeking at him over the uneven rim. Her gaze was dark still, full of emotion. Her scent was rank with it as well, rank with despair.

Her stare left Sesshomaru with a gradual, sinking feeling in his gut. He tried to dismiss the emotion but it was firm. He found himself thinking, _Rin is not to blame for the losses._

It was _his_ fault. He could never explain it to her, but he had long since understood it to be true. The mix between them, the offspring it created, could not seem to survive. Rin was a strong, fertile example of the female spirit. She wanted to give him a child with all of her being. But his inuyoukai seed overwhelmed the human genes. There was no balance. The babies died inside their mother. It was not Rin's body that failed, but the babies themselves that could not carry on.

He found himself wondering if even the inuyoukai girl from Nishiyori's family would be able to carry his heir…

"You're going away, aren't you?" Rin asked, cutting into his thoughts suddenly. She was searching his face, worriedly.

He didn't answer her question, but asked one of his own that told her in a roundabout way that he _was_ leaving. "Will you recover?"

Her face fell. "Sesshomaru-sama…" there were tears glistening in her gaze. Sesshomaru looked away, his jaw tightening, the only sign of his distress at her tears. "I will be fine, but—you're leaving, so soon after…" she choked and lowered her face, "This lowly woman wishes that Lord Sesshomaru would stay with her while she mourns…"

"There is a war in the Middle Lands. I am expanding my territory, Rin. I must go—but I will return in three days, I promise you." he calculated quickly. A day to arrive. A day to prepare the girl and have her bound to him. A day to come back to Rin. It would be tight but it would work…

Luck was with him, he mused sickeningly, if Rin had been healthy she might've asked to go with him. He would have a hard time telling her no, she was accustomed to being pampered. With the latest miscarriage she was bound to the castle for a good week, mourning, recovering. When he returned she would be swiftly feeling better and they could resume their lives until the next doomed child sprang up in her womb…

Rin could see that there would be dissuading him. She kept her face lowered; wishing she were a girl again and that she had bangs to hide her eyes from him. "Sesshomaru-sama." She bowed slightly and turned away, showing him more of her back and shoulder.

"Rin." Sesshomaru murmured to her back. He might've reached out for her, might've kissed her or caressed her as a final good bye…but the thought of his secret from her, his treachery, it made him cold inside. He rose from her side and left, walking for the door.

* * *

A/N: For some reason his secret, his thoughts, are very, very seductive to little old me the writer. This spilled out of me at a remarkable rate. A hint for the first chapter:

_Ginrei bit her lips and fought to hide her rage from them. Part of her mind reeled. **Is this really happening? Am I really the only one that's been left alive? Am I really here before these strange demons being called "bitch" like I'm nothing more than…**_

_And then it hit her, full force, like a fist in the face. Nothing more than breeding stock. She knew why she had been spared. She knew why they had gone from girl to girl, asking one question that most of the girls failed, all but her… _


	2. Meeting and Marriage

**A/N: **Wow, writing this is a lot different from Kagome and Inuyasha. I find it pretty addicting. It's a whole new and different world. The harshness that Ginrei is put through may seem a little…wrong. You might read it thinking OMG NO way! But according to my Art and Architecture of Japan professor last semester as nations and cultures are ranked on different things Japan is NUMBER ONE in masculinity. I'm not entirely sure what that means but for the most part we are all aware that in most cultures it is better to be a man than a woman. Sociology preaches that women are the **_largest_** minority out there, (a.k.a. WE are the largest single group that's mistreated/abused out there.) Also I write this knowing a lot of Japan's history was spent rebuilding things after someone else came through and burned it down. And in a series I highly recommend called _Tales of the Otori_ by Lian Hearn, the women in a conquered castle, relatives of the noble that ruled there before the invading army won, are _expected_ to kill themselves out of honor. Anyway, that's just a note about where Ginrei is coming from.

Disclaimer: No I do not own any of them.

To **Hinata-chan** I'm not sure if you've read my other stories, but in them I explain that even if Rin has children with Sesshomaru they _cannot_ inherit the Western Lands. So even Rin understands that Sesshomaru _must_ at some point sire full-blooded heirs for his kingdom. The real problem here is that Sesshomaru cannot bring himself to tell her what he's done, he has not been open with her about it. Just to reiterate that Sesshomaru has not done this because Rin has been unable to carry a baby to term, though I believe psychologically that is indeed a factor for his choice to do this _now._ Anyway, just a note.

* * *

**Meeting and Marriage**

The army had moved into a valley several miles away from Nishiyori's burned out palace. Tents were pitched made of deer and horse hides for the men, the inuyoukai soldiers dispersed, some quietly leaving after telling their generals of their plans, others lingering in the shadows of the forest, contemplating the Isei province and the new land they had just conquered.

None of it was supposed to go to the Middle Lands—and that was mostly a good thing since many of the soldiers were not from the Middle Lands, they were loyal citizens of the Western Lands and they wondered just what Sesshomaru would do with the new province added to his territory.

Sasugainu and Shimofuri had commandeered a nearby temple as their quarters. They sat between statues of the Buddha and the Kannons (A/N: MS word does not recognize that word but I believe it to be spelled right. I think if I recall correctly, that's like saying a different spirit/image of the Buddha, a representation of his many different forms…there are a LOT of Kannons.) surrounded in luxurious bronze and gold. Human monks chanted in the spaces around them, hardly disturbed by the warring clans. Commanders and soldiers and many messengers, came and went through the temple meeting them in their strangest, and likely grandest audience hall.

It had only been a few days since Shimofuri had sent the human messenger to seek Sesshomaru. The messenger could barely have reached the Western Lands in that amount of time and only just passed along the message to the demon lord. And yet, near dawn, Sesshomaru appeared, apparently eager to claim his reward.

"Lord Sesshomaru," Shimofuri greeted him that morning, "I see I will not have to escort your betrothed into your lands to meet you after all." Again he wondered, narrowing his eyes at Sesshomaru, what did Rin think of all this? Humans were notoriously emotional. He doubted, with as much passion as Rin had, that she had simply nodded and allowed her mate to do this. Especially the means…the spoils of war? It was gruesome…

"Where are you keeping her?" Sesshomaru was heading straight to business, no messing around at all. His amber eyes stared with a deceiving blandness between Sasugainu and Shimofuri.

"She is safe." Sasugainu answered, "In a back room of this temple. We have locked her there and hired women to tend her."

Shimofuri cleared his throat uncertainly. "She has not spoken since the night we burned her castle."

"You have injured her." Sesshomaru did not pose this as a question, and there was no sign of emotion in his face either. That drew a small shudder out of Shimofuri.

Sasugainu hurried to answer his question, "No, not that we are aware of. We had a physician examine her. She has no broken bones, her lungs sound well enough…" he paused, throwing Shimofuri a nervous glance, "She can fight and move well enough."

Sesshomaru had noticed the look. He narrowed his eyes on Shimofuri warningly. "You fought with her?"

Shimofuri shifted slightly, tense and stiff. "She took her true form and fought _me._ I was wounded." He gestured at his shoulder. "I did not harm her. I was well aware that she is your bitch now." he lowered his head in a bow, feeling the sweat on his brow thickening. "Lord Sesshomaru."

There was a moment of silence that was filled with the toll of bells in the distance, counting out the early hour of eight in the morning. The monks began to chant their sutras, solemnly. Their voices filled the room with the Buddhas. Shimofuri felt suddenly sad again beneath them. He wanted to finish the entire gruesome business. And he _never_ wanted to see the girl again.

"Lord Sesshomaru," Sasugainu spoke up again, "Your army. They have been disbanding since out latest victory. The humans have mostly stayed but the demons you have employed beneath you—they have been leaving of their own free will. This province is yours now. What, if I may ask, will you do with it?"

Sesshomaru appeared to very slowly focus his gaze on Shimofuri's uncle. His eyes were almost narrowed with annoyance. "I will develop it. Tell me, have any of Nishiyori's castles and palaces remained intact?"

"One—to the south of here. It was secured by your army a few months ago without a fight. There were only women in it, they were killed." Sasugainu answered.

"Is that where this bitch came from?" Sesshomaru asked; his voice was distinctly cold.

"No, she was in Nishiyori's innermost palace. It was where he kept his closest womenfolk."

Shimofuri pointed his gaze elsewhere while his uncle and his cousin talked. The conversation disturbed him and his weakness for that bothered him even more. There was only one thing he cared to know about Sesshomaru's plans, and when the silence came once again, letting them hear the latest chanting by the monks, Shimofuri asked it.

"What have you done with my sister, Lord Sesshomaru?" the young lord and the older lord stared at each other with the beginnings of dislike. "You have no further need of a hostage; you have gained all that we agreed upon. The Isei province is yours. You have the bitch you requested. She is unrelated to you. I hired an expert in the clan's genealogies just to be certain of that. So tell me, cousin, what of my sister?"

Sasugainu was frowning beside Shimofuri, irritated in the audacity of his nephew for having spoken so frankly to someone so powerful as Sesshomaru. "Shimofuri…" he warned, growling.

Both Sesshomaru and Shimofuri ignored him. Sesshomaru answered his cousin's question swiftly. "She is keeping Lady Rin company. I am educating her as your mother never bothered. You may visit her at any time you please, Shimofuri, as I have told you before."

"You're going to keep her with you?" Shimofuri demanded, openly frowning now.

"Yes—she is a member of my household now. One day I will release her to move freely between either household, when she is fully trained and can defend herself, of course." Sesshomaru's patience was beginning to wane. His single hand twitched once at his side and then withdrew into the sleeve of his white haori. His voice was cold, hollow. "Lead me to the bitch you have secured."

Shimofuri sneered now, openly, filled with frustration and disgust with the other demon lord. "Uncle, please take Lord Sesshomaru to see his _betrothed._" He offered the beaten girl a title of respect. Crossing his arms he turned his body slightly away from Sesshomaru and proceeded to have nothing more to do with him.

Sasugainu's face was tight with the underlying tensions of the room. He bowed once a little to his nephew and then rose to his feet and walked toward the temple doors. Sesshomaru moved behind him wordlessly, stiff and with a noticeable downturn of his usually expressionless lips.

* * *

There were guards following behind. They were not merely human guards either, they were inuyoukai. In the light of the day Ginrei could see that their armor was a style that reminded her of the wide Western Lands. When she looked to them they had cold, almost hostile expressions.

The maids had heated water for her. She'd had bathes almost daily now. Not even in the castle had that expense been taken every morning. Some days were dedicated entirely to studying. There was no time for a bath. But now there were only baths and sleep, and teas brewed by the monks to keep her calm and sedated. She knew, faintly, that they were waiting for something, or _someone._ She had been spared while everyone else was killed. It wasn't because she was deserving, or because she was more beautiful or intelligent, it was simply because of who her parents were, or _weren't. _

And that morning as they took her out to the bathhouse in the small village yet again, Ginrei saw the blood red halo in the sunrise and she knew the time had come. Her fingers shook when she handled the soaps. The women that had been hired to be her maids handled it for her, scrubbing and humming quietly to themselves. Ginrei could feel nothing but a looming doom, waiting for her just outside the bath.

They presented her with the usual bland robes—on the battlefield there was nothing elaborate. The women tied her kimono closed, smoothed the wrinkles. They combed out her hair in the moist, damp bathhouse, and then coiled it and pinned it high on her head. They pressed fresh, flowery scented oils into her skin. She could only frown and try not to cry at the headache they gave her.

In a bronzed mirror by the doorway Ginrei caught sight of herself and stopped, fighting the maids as they pulled at her, trying to drag her into the frigid winter morning air. Her face was clean of the grit that the fire must have left on her. She could see strange, bright white line over each cheek, under each eye. Marks of her demon heritage. The blood that had splattered on her face the night of the fire had been washed away. Her nose could only find the scents of the bathhouse. Warm, moist, comforting.

But inside she felt no comfort. She wished she'd died with Kanbi and her sisters, or suffocated in the fire and never had to go beyond it, wondering why she had been spared and what for…why she should be dishonored as she was, pulled away from her mother, her sisters, all of her protective male kin…

Though the face in the mirror was young and healthy and even beautiful—Ginrei saw nothing good there. She turned her eyes away, feeling how heavy they were with her shameful, unshed tears. The human women chattered around her, reaching out to wipe away the tears, saying she would mess up her make up and wash away the scented oils they'd perfumed her hair and body with. Ginrei pushed them away, walking on ahead of them, resigned to returning to her cruddy little room in the back of the temple, to hearing the monks tolling the bells and chanting the sutras endlessly…

The inuyoukai guards were leering at her in their own quiet way. They had seen the fuss about her tears; they could still smell them on her. Perhaps they were disgusted with her for not having died with the rest of her kin in the fire and the execution. She slipped past them, trying to hold her head high.

She was on her way back to the temple, the maids trailing behind her, clucking like hens, when she spotted several inuyoukai ahead of her—two of them. They were lithe and tall, dressed in armor and wearing rich, flowing kimono. They were both fair like she was, fairer than her actually. Almost white-haired. One she faintly recognized as having seen before, one of the generals that had lead the army that massacred her family. The other was foreign to her and—_more powerful._ He had armor that she again recognized as being from the Western Lands…

The maids flocked around her, having caught up, and—seeing the approaching inuyoukai—immediately fell to the snow on their knees, bowing. Ginrei remained standing, fighting the sickness that suddenly swelled within her. She hunched her shoulders, not because she was possessed by the urge to bow to these lords, but because she felt as if she might puke.

The demon lord with the western armor waited just behind the other that she recognized. She could almost pinpoint who he was, this general that had helped murder her family and burn her castle. He was from the Middle Lands…she searched her mind as he approached but no name came to her.

The lords paused, there was a moment of tremendous awkwardness as both realized that Ginrei was not about to bow to them. There could be no nice, neat, formal introductions. Ginrei lost interest in the lord with the Western armor; her only desire was to lash out at the lord from the Middle Lands for his part in her family's defeat and dishonor. She tried to run through the provinces in her mind, their leaders. Taikokajin, the crazed female leader of the Nanka province, Nishiyori of course of the Isei…the other two escaped her mind—but wait, Taikokajin had been dying and out of her mind. _Who was her heir?_ Ginrei had never paid attention to the politics, and not she wished she had.

At last the moment of tension ended when the lord from the Middle Lands gestured to her with one hand. "This is the bitch." He was frowning helplessly, "She hasn't spoken—we don't know her name…"

Ginrei bit her lips and fought to hide her rage from them. Part of her mind reeled. _Is this really happening? Am I really the only one that's been left alive? Am I really here before these strange demons being called "bitch" like I'm nothing more than…_

And then it hit her, full force, like a fist in the face. _Nothing more than breeding stock. _She knew why she had been spared. She knew why they had gone from girl to girl, asking one question that most of the girls failed, all but her…

She looked to the two lords, first to the one from the Middle Lands and then, slowly, to the lord from the west. He was staring at her with a narrowed gaze; his eyes were an alarming amber.

It was then that she knew who he was—_golden eyes. He's Sesshomaru, the great lord Inutaisho's heir…_

The two realizations made her sway, losing her balance. New tears sprang to her eyes as the fresh shame, the fresh stinging insult, rose to the fore. _I am their object, to be bought and traded. _She stumbled, falling to her knees as if she was bowing, but really she was full of a despairing rage, a helpless bitterness. Her clawed fingers clutched and the snow as the first tears fell, careening away from her and melting into the snow invisibly.

She didn't see the grimace on both lords' faces. Sesshomaru spoke first, "She's fair. You have the wrong girl."

"No." Sasugainu replied shortly, "Lord Shimofuri hired a scholar, an expert in genealogies. He assured us that she is unrelated. Her father was Seiyo, not Nishiyori like all the others. Seiyo was unrelated to you…?" Seiyo was dead now, of course, but it was still a relevant question.

"That is correct." Sesshomaru answered blandly. "But what of her mother's side?"

"Those roots go back to the mainland as I understand it." Sasugainu frowned, "She certainly doesn't _smell_ like a cousin of ours."

The girl was still shaking, cowering seemingly beside her maids. It was pitiful, Sesshomaru thought, and yet something stirred within him. He thought, disturbingly, of Rin when he'd first seen her as nothing more than a girl, frightened and still mourning the loss of her family. This inuyoukai girl was much the same, young, fragile, and in mourning.

And in spite of himself, Sesshomaru had a soft spot for that. He searched inside, digging for his coldest thoughts, distancing himself from the inuyoukai girl and her plight.

"I have brought gifts for her." he told Sasugainu boredly. "There are fine robes that she may wear at the ceremony."

Sasugainu dared to raise an eyebrow and he smirked, quirking one lip with amusement. "Lord Sesshomaru wastes no time."

Sesshomaru threw Shimofuri's idiot uncle a glare. "If you speak again with such disrespect I will have you killed."

Sasugainu blinked and promptly bowed, mumbling swift apologies. "Many apologies, my lord." He deferred to Sesshomaru easily, even amiably, despite the other demon's harshness.

Sesshomaru was again staring at the shaking girl. "Get her inside. Have her dressed and ready for the ceremony by midday. We will be leaving immediately after."

"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru." Sasugainu bowed low and stayed that way until the lord of the Western Lands had walked away, his neat boots barely crunching on the crusty snow.

* * *

She was ready for the ceremony much sooner than midday. The maids had already washed her, covered her in perfumes, and put her hair up. When Sasugainu brought them the rich silken kimono robes Sesshomaru had brought as gifts for the marriage ceremony, they hurriedly undressed Ginrei out of her simple robes and helped her into the new ones. It had multiple layers and was very thick. Ginrei was thankful for that, despite its heavy weight.

Throughout the day she kept her eyes downcast, helpless but enraged. Occasionally shameful tears coursed down her cheeks and the maids scolded her. She turned her face away from them, wiping the tears away with her own hands, even though it smeared the makeup they were trying to decorate her with. Ginrei felt as if it was al happening to someone else. It was all a horrible nightmare.

She would wake up at any moment and find Kanbi, Giniro, Chiwa, Ransou, her mother, all of her littlest sisters no more than pups, all of her cousins…

But the day wore on and she never opened her eyes to find anything new and different than the nightmare her life had become overnight.

Before they painted her lips they offered her rice, trying to get her to eat. It was bland human food, Ginrei turned it away. There was no hunger in her stomach, though she had hardly eaten in days. The monk brought her more of the calming tea. She tried to refuse it but he insisted. He was a kind old man and she had grown attached to him faintly. She took the tea and drank it all. She tried to find the words to thank him but nothing came.

The sun rose higher outside the wooden walls of her tiny room. The maids painted her lips, just the lower one, to give her lips a distinctive pout. Ginrei scowled at them as they bustled around. She brushed fingers across her lips, across her face, mussing the make up they had worked on so diligently. They fussed over her, cursed her under their tongues. She was glad to cause them trouble, though they didn't deserve her difficulty. They were innocents, hired to help the inuyoukai lords do this horrible dishonor to her, and yet rebelling in the childish, spiteful way that she could, pleased her.

When they finally left her alone for a short time, Ginrei stared down at the rich kimono the lord from the west had provided her. She sneered at it, considered tearing it apart with her claws…and then sighed. It was not the kimono's fault that she happened to be unrelated to the word of the Western Lands. It was Fate that had seen to it that things happened in just that way. It could have been Ginrei sitting beside Kanbi or any one of Ginrei's sisters. They had all met the same single prerequisite for survival. But Fate had seen to it that Ginrei was the survivor, Ginrei was the one.

For a moment she wondered if perhaps Sesshomaru would prove to be caring, a noble, caring husband who would be gentle with her. He might not love her, and would never expect it of her either, but they might live cordially. She thought of becoming a mother to his pups…

Her stomach tightened; there was a sour taste in her mouth. She would never be so lucky! She was a spoil of war, a funny thing for the inuyoukai lords to leer at and chuckle over. _How dare they?_ She thought; _Uncle Nishiyori and Father were good leaders, wise and strong. They would have married me off in due time, after educating me, training me. They knew my worth, they respected all of their daughters…_Nishiyori and Seiyo had had many, many daughters in their time, and they had made each a powerful figure before sending them to arranged marriages.

Though Ginrei did not know it, one of her older cousins was married to one of the generals that had helped murder her kin. Sasugainu's wife and mate was one of Nishiyori's granddaughters.

She thought of her true form, how it had come to her in her moment of terror and rage on the night her life had been turned upside down. If she could take that form again, run through the temple and escape…

Closing her eyes, she reached inside herself, looking for the inner beast. It was there, waiting. But when she tried to rouse her the beast was unresponsive. Dizziness swarmed in Ginrei's head, but the girl kept trying. Finally she tipped over, knocking her head on the floor and crying out. There was a smudge of red from her lips on the floor, a dash of white from her painted face. She sneered at it, baring her fangs.

The monk had given her the tea steadily. She had scented the herbs and felt their calming effect, but she hadn't dreamt that they might be drugging enough to stop a transformation. She sat very still, listening to the walls of the temple creak and groan as a wind started up outside. And then the sounds became footsteps, thumping over the floorboards.

Ginrei rose to her feet, her spine stiffening. One of the maids opened the door, admitting a servant carrying a tray with sake and cups on it. Behind him came the old monk that she had thought of—previously—with fondness. Now she turned her eyes away from him, bitterly. Beyond these humans there were the inuyoukai lords. Ginrei saw the lord from the west, regal and cold with his pale skin and frosty hair. For a moment she admired the purple-red slashes on his face, demon marks.

And then the demon in front of the western lord caught her eyes. He was younger by far, and as his scent wafted to her she recognized it doubly. Not only was he the male that had fought with her when she had claimed her true form under stress, but he was also a cousin of hers. It was distant, but the relation was there. She could even see it in his darker features, his handsome blue-gray eyes, the turquoise stripes on his cheeks. She remembered who he was then, Taikokajin's heir. He looked nothing like her but for the color of the markings on his cheeks…

She watched as both the young heir and the older Sesshomaru entered the room stiffly. They were all cleaned and dressed more elaborately than she had seen so far. Clearly it was time for the marriage ceremony.

She felt abruptly sick. It was a moment she had always doubted would truly come, and yet here it was. She looked down at the lavish robes she was dressed in again; at the sake on the tray with the cups…this was never how it was supposed to happen in her dreams!

"Sit, child." the human monk ordered, not unkindly. His face was warm and sympathetic.

Where were her relatives to represent her? Where was her mother in attendance, where were her brothers, her father, her cousins? She felt warm wet touches running down her cheeks, pooling at the corners of her lips. She sat as the monk commanded and the chanting began, the blessings. _How can they bless this ceremony? It is nothing but cursed!_

Shimofuri had taken a spot behind her, and she realized with a jolt that _he_ was representing _her_ dead family. She glared at him, aware that he had helped kill the ones he was now standing in for. The young lord refused to look her in the eye, but Ginrei felt a thrill of victory when she noticed his hands in his lap were fidgeting nervously.

When she looked back to Sesshomaru she started, realizing for the first time that he had only one arm…but she stared a little too long as her husband to be made himself comfortable, sitting almost knee to knee with her. His golden eyes narrowed with disdain as he realized what she was looking at. Ginrei flinched away from the press of his knees against her own. _Why do you flinch?_ Her thoughts tormented her, _you will need to share his bed tonight and every night afterward…_

She felt sick again.

The monk's chanting had reached a certain place that had signaled a change in the ceremony. Sake was poured. The acrid scent made Ginrei nearly choke. Sesshomaru eyed her like a predator, coldly, calculating, the entire time. She could barely look at him. When the servant handed her the cup full of sake her hands quivered and shook. Sake spilled a little onto her lap, damping the kimono.

As she set the cup down on the tray again, hands and fingers still quivering, Sesshomaru looked at that moment more as if he wanted to kill her rather than marry her. Ginrei hated the disappointment and fear she felt at such a thought. What should she have expected? It was probably wiser to wish for death. She stared at his side, at his sword, wondering how it would feel to die, and faintly she remembered the split second when she had believed that she_ was_ dead…

And then there was another cup of sake, and another. She felt tipsy, sick and queasy. The ceremony pained her, she hated it. She thought happily that it would soon be over, and then dreaded it. _When it's over I am his. _The golden eyes reminded her of a hawk, conniving, cold, and hungry. _This isn't how it was meant to be…_

She felt the tears start up again. Sesshomaru's form wavered in her blurred vision. The monk's chanting was momentarily something different, a far off, sweet dream. Her mother, stroking her hair as she fell asleep with the other women in the palace. Her mother singing a song about all the different kinds of love in the world, of all the beautiful things in the world. Ginrei latched onto that dream and felt her body grow heavy as sleep consumed her, freeing her of her problems.

Exhaustion took her, letting the dream sluice over her like rainwater, and take her away…

She fell forward into Sesshomaru's lap, unconscious.

* * *

A/N: And that's a wrap! Here's the clip for the next chapter because I happen to have it written:

"_You may not." Sesshomaru responded, blandly again. He felt her hurt gaze on him but he ignored her and once again started to eat. The rice was dry and tasteless on his tongue. _

_Rin sighed, slowly. "Maybe Sesshomaru-sama should consider giving Tsukiyume her request." _

_He didn't even bother dignifying Rin's request with words. He threw her a glare over the rim of his cup as he drank to wash down the thick, lumpy rice. He needed to find their chef and fire him. _


	3. Naishougoto: Palace on the Lake

Long Note (positive)! A/N: I have no idea how Sesshomaru would be sitting down at dinner. What you read here is my best guess. Also, do full blooded inuyoukai eat? And if so, what? I really don't know. But Inuyasha seems to be absolutely un-picky about most foods. He'll eat his meat mostly raw. But one must wonder if this is simply an Inuyasha trait, like his uncouth swearing and such. I'm sure Sesshomaru would probably look down on his brother's choices of food…so what does that leave him? I really don't know but I'm going to write assuming that he would eat like a human of nobility, expecting the highest quality out of it or something. As for his table conversing, I doubted that food would make him much livelier. Yet as I wrote it I felt nervous about it, like "OMG I accidentally slipped into writing Inuyasha's character." But in rereading it I think it's ok, and if I have it right it only illustrates the quiet similarity between the brothers.

To **briar:** I totally understand and I take no offence. No I will never pair Rin or Inuyasha or anything like that, and I hate Inuyasha/Kikyo fics too. This one is ambiguous. It can swing either way, Rin/Sess or Ginrei/Sess. Sesshomaru will connect with Ginrei because of guilt and for the fact that she is a full blooded demon like him. But he has known Rin longer, in his heart, even if she were to hate him, and if he were to be angry with her, I believe he would still be technically faithful (stubbornly locking himself away and just seeing no one yet too proud to seek her out himself).

Of course he has to be "unfaithful" (he's not really married to Rin so it is not truly cheating…) simply to produce an heir, so you must realize that there will be a physical thing at least between Sess/Ginrei. This is a story in my mind of dark passion, the forced choices we have to make in life sometimes. I will try to keep it balanced, but as a character I like Ginrei, I may develop her into something different as time goes on (semi-villainess perhaps?) but for now it is my hope that you will all begrudgingly come to like her as well so that you would not mind that she must share Sesshy at least for a time.

Short answer **briar** (If such a thing is possible from me…) this will be a fic about both, more Ginrei in the beginning but assuredly Rin in particular will never truly be turned out on the street (though I might just drag all of my readers through fire and all seven-ish layers of hell and all of the characters may feel just as terrible as you do for quite a while) but, as those who have read my other stories will vouch, I leave you usually with a happy ending. In the end I ask you **briar** and others, to hang tight and give me a chance…and as always I am willing to listen, even eager. You're opinions matter that they help me as a writer to learn and to grow. Thank you and I hope I can earn you and others who worry about the same issue, as readers. Love to have you for the ride.

Disclaimer: No I'm afraid none of them are mine.

* * *

**Naishougoto: Palace on the Lake**

_If Sesshomaru knew about this he would probably have me killed._ Tsukiyume thought to herself as she whirled away from Rin, twirling her pole in a defensive arc. Both the woman and the hanyou girl wore face masks to protect themselves. They dressed in plain white robes for the sparring match, hair tied back tightly at the napes of their necks.

"You can do better than that!" Rin yelled, lunging at the hanyou, her pole lifted and set at the fighting level.

Tsuki twisted, parrying Rin's thrust with more strength than she intended. The human was pushed away with so much force that she stumbled backward, nearly tripping. Tsukiyume immediately rushed at her, shouting, "Rin! Rin are you okay? Lady Rin?"

But Rin was fine and as she corrected her balance she struck out, catching Tsukiyume in the stomach with a blow that might've made a human fall to his knees and retch. Yet to the hanyou girl the blow wasn't nearly as powerful, she groaned but remained on her feet, pinning away.

When she was far enough away to be safe she scowled at her sparring companion. "You cheat!"

Rin didn't answer. She had stopped and pulled her face mask off. She shook out her long black hair and bent over, panting. Tsukiyume paused, cautious. Rin tended to fight hard, so hard that she wore herself out. She'd been trained since she was nothing more than a child, by Sesshomaru himself. The girl didn't know the meaning of the word "quit."

"Are you okay?"

Slowly, the dark-haired head shook. Her hair slipped past her shoulders and surrounded her face in a huge black curtain, blocking Tsukiyume's view. Rin answered from somewhere within it. "It's…" she slapped one palm over her lower abdomen, which was still slightly rounded with her last failed pregnancy.

Tsukiyume could still smell the lingering stress hormones, as well as the heavy remnants of pregnancy scents. She dropped her own fighting pole and tore off her face mask, tossing it to the ground. "We shouldn't have been doing this. Let's go have a bath, Rin." She smiled at the human girl, thought she knew that Rin couldn't see her.

Since coming into Sesshomaru's household Tsukiyume had grown quite a bit, in several ways. Physically she was now taller than Rin by nearly six inches. She had also been educated, growing intellectually by leaps and bounds. Her intelligence had surprised her tutors, and they had openly admitted that. Apparently hanyou were expected to be deficient somehow. Tsukiyume thought that was a misconception they had fostered because of Inuyasha. She knew that hanyou not to be dumb at all, but rather just blustering with emotion. He _hid_ his intelligence because it wasn't important to him for survival. A long time ago Tsuki would have said that Sesshomaru was cold and stoic and nothing like his hanyou brother except for appearances. But now she knew Sesshomaru was _far_ from cold. He would bluster too, if he hadn't been educated and raised carefully. Even so, she thought she could see Inuyasha's curses, his blustering, just beneath Sesshomaru's surface.

Sesshomaru valued the arts and education of the higher classes, embracing them and nurturing them. He had had Rin educated when she was a child, and now he was doing the same for Tsukiyume. The lessons had made her braver, increased her courage. She was still at times the shy, timid hanyou girl that Taikokajin had sheltered in the Middle Lands, and she would always be more bookish than anything else—but not around Rin.

Rin dropped her pole. It clattered over the wooden practice floor loudly, making Tsukiyume cringe and flatten her ears. "Rin?"

When the human girl sat upright Tsukiyume both smelled and saw her tears, though Rin was already wiping them away. "I'm sorry." She tried to smile faintly, "It's just…"

Tsukiyume closed the gap between them, ducking slightly to be more on level with the human. "It's okay." She awkwardly tried to comfort Rin but it felt wrong to her. Rin was usually not the weak one between them. Rin had spent many months trying to get Tsukiyume to speak more than just a few sentences to her in a day. And now that she had succeeded in that she was falling apart.

Normally during Rin's mourning period after a miscarriage—and Tsukiyume had seen one other—the girl was kept away from Tsukiyume, as if letting them spend time together would weaken Rin further. But currently Sesshomaru was not home, and Rin was bursting with loneliness and longing for freedom. Yet physically as well as emotionally she was not recovered.

"Don't cry…"

Rin straightened, blinking her tears back viciously. "I'm not. It was—the pain."

Tsukiyume's ears flattened. She opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again, which made Rin smile, thinking of a fish when it's been pulled out of water. But then she looked at Tsuki's ears, the white dog ears flicking on top of her head, and the pain tugged on her heart again, wrenching it like a fist. She lowered her head, letting her black hair fall before her eyes again, obscuring her face.

"Did…" she swallowed nervously, refusing to let Tsukiyume see her crying, though she knew that the hanyou could certainly smell it just like Sesshomaru, "Did your mother ever speak of how it was when you were…" the words faded and died, unable to be fully expressed.

Tsukiyume already knew what Rin was trying to ask, yet at the mention of her mother she sighed, ears drooping a little. Months ago she had lost her mother, and despite the passage of time the pain was still fresh. "My mother never told me anything about her pregnancy."

Through where she held onto Rin's shoulders, Tsukiyume could feel the other girl beginning to tremble. "I don't understand. What's wrong with me? I know it can be done…" she lifted her eyes finally, letting Tsukiyume see the deep, almost blackish pools of tears shimmering there. She realized with a slow dawning sympathy that seeing Tsukiyume everyday had to be a bitter reminder of all the babies she'd lost.

"There's nothing wrong with you." Tsuki punctuated each word with a tiny shake from her hands. "Don't worry about it Rin, ok? I'm sure Lord Sesshomaru will find a way. You never know, maybe that's what he's out there doing right now."

* * *

In fact that was _not_ what Sesshomaru was doing at that instant. Instead he was entering the grounds around a small palace in the southern Isei province, one that had not been burned in the civil war but had remained intact, merely evicted of its owners some months previous. Carpenters and architects were still working on the palace, trying to remove the bloodstains and redesign the grounds to a style more fitting for the Western Lands.

The humans hadn't expected his arrival of course. They met him at the gate, bowing and muttering apologies. He ignored them and marched onto the grounds, through the snowy gardens. It was in disrepair, trees burned, upturned, the small river flowing nearby stank to his fine nose. Someone had allowed something to rot in it in the time that had passed between the army's rampage through the area and now when the civil war was at last finished.

The palace had been built on platforms out on the surface of a small lake. A mist hung over the edges of the place, shrouding it. _I should call it secret,_ he thought, the name was fitting with the mist, with the unconscious girl—his new _wife_—in his arms. _Naishougoto._

He thought fleetingly of Rin's dark, tear-filled eyes, and forced the thought away, pressing on. The humans followed him, gawking silently at the inuyoukai girl in his arms.

Sesshomaru crossed the narrow bridge to the palace, letting his mouth twist with disgust at the smell that rose faintly from the murky water. The palace was small, little more than a resort. It had been blessed and purified since the army had passed through; killing the previous inhabitants, but Sesshomaru was almost certain he could still smell blood and death within the place.

He carted the girl—_his wife,_ he reminded himself—up to the second floor. There were several small bedrooms and a balcony open to the view of the gardens and the misty lake. Sesshomaru found the most appealing of the bedrooms and laid the girl over the futon there, gently.

One of the humans trotted up to the door behind him, falling to his knees on the floor loudly, clumsily, making Sesshomaru think of a cow trying to climb up a slippery slope. He turned slowly to face the man with disgust. "Speak, human."

The man sat up. His head was very round and shaped like an egg. "My lord the palace is not ready—this lowly being begs your forgiveness—but it is not ready to house guests…"

"Whether it is ready or not," Sesshomaru answered, coolly, "We will be staying here. I will be leaving tomorrow morning. My wife—" the words felt disgusting on his tongue, a lie, a terrible deception. Again he thought of Rin's eyes, her tears, the scent of their dead daughters as they had slipped from her womb time and time again "—will be staying here alone after that time."

The little egg-headed man nodded, his mouth open and gaping, "Yes sir. Yes my lord…"

He started to turn and leave, and looked as though he would slide the door shut behind him as well, but Sesshomaru cleared his throat quietly, signaling that he had not yet dismissed him. The egghead dropped again into a bow and waited.

"You must find some women—maids. For my wife." Again the words slowed his speech, and he hesitated, losing his train of thought. The egghead looked upwards at him, curious at the pause. Sesshomaru finished quickly with mounting irritation for the exchange. "After I have gone some inuyoukai will appear here. They will be guards I have sent to protect my—_her." _Somehow that felt a little less treacherous to him.

The egghead nodded and slipped out, shutting the door behind him and continually muttering apologies.

Alone, Sesshomaru glanced back at the inuyoukai girl on the futon, still wrapped up in the kimono she'd been married in, and that she'd spilled sake on. He snarled in silent disgust, allowing the full expression to cross his face now that he was as good as alone.

He rose to his feet and walked to the door, sliding it wide open and then stepping into the hallway. Slowly, almost ceremoniously, Sesshomaru opened every one of the bedroom doors, leaving them wide open so that the air from the balcony washed into the palace. It stank a little like the lake, but it took away the sour smell in the rooms, the faint lingering stench of death. He didn't want to remind the girl of her loss. The way she had shaken, the way she had cowered and cried and passed out—pitiful.

He tried to hate her for her weakness—because that absolved _him_ of guilt. _She should be dead like the rest of her family. _But she wasn't, his wish for a wife to provide his heirs, that selfish desire had kept the girl alive, had made her suffer in effect, _for him. _In a roundabout way, _he owed her._

Frustrated, Sesshomaru settled onto the balcony, ignoring the chill, and stared out onto the stillness of the shrouded lake. Even the faint smell didn't bother him as he struggled to empty his mind, searching for something else to occupy himself with aside from his mate or his wife…

_Wife. _It was even foreign in his thoughts.

He watched the humans scurrying about, repairing the palace even as he took shelter in it…_with my wife…_

* * *

Ginrei woke with a jolt, wide awake, blinking in the semi-darkness. There was a gentle breeze brushing past her cheeks, whispering over her ears. Her hands squished into a mattress. She looked down at herself and found the heavy, lavish kimono still on her…and then she remembered the wedding.

Tears threatened again and once and she reached her hands up to cover her face, sniffling. When they came away again she saw touches of color and remembered the maids painting her face. She sneered and rubbed angrily at her face, making tiny sounds of frustration in the back of her throat. A listener would have found them to be almost babyish, whimpering cries, but Ginrei didn't pause to give them any consideration.

_This is my wedding night._ The thought smacked her, seeming to smash straight into her stomach. She touched her body through the fabric of the kimono, suddenly stricken with fear. Nothing hurt, nothing had happened while she slept…but still she trembled thinking about the monk, of the medicinal tea that had been drugged to keep away her true form.

She thought of that again briefly and then dismissed it. Whoever her husband was he had not harmed her while she slept, perhaps he would never touch her. Perhaps he was interested more in men. Maybe he was lonely—she remembered dimly that the talk of Sesshomaru was that he was removed from the clan, he _hated _it. Of course that would mean he would not receive a mate from the clan. He would have to acquire one some other way…

And then she understood, at last, why things had happened the way they had. Why Sesshomaru had used the war as he had to gain a wife. She felt the bitterness again that Fate had chosen her, but she was grateful that she at least understood _why_ it had happened the way it had.

The kimono stank like the sake she had clumsily spilled on it. Ginrei pulled herself upright slowly and began to look around. She was inside a small room, the door was wide open. It was dimly lit and a breeze traveled through it from the hall. The room across from her own was also wide open. The entire place was strikingly bare—if she concentrated she thought she could almost smell blood, death—but then she caught the stink of a lake and scowled. _A lake? Are we on water?_

She stepped hesitantly out into the hallway. The floor boards were cold; her toes cringed from touching them. Why hadn't her husband remembered to bring socks with the kimono? As her step landed on a squeaky board in front of one room, Ginrei stopped, aware then that Sesshomaru was nearby. She could _smell_ him on the breeze passing through the bedrooms, but could not see him.

He spoke then, seemingly from inside one of the rooms ahead of her and to her left. "You're awake."

She stayed perfectly still, staring at the open entrance to that room and straining her ears, listening for his movement. Part of her debated running, the rest of her was still lagging behind, confused, almost sleepy…

"They told me you can speak." His voice was lighter than she remembered on their first meeting—if it could be called a meeting. Despite herself part of her was curious. He was said to be a powerful lord, mysterious. He governed the Western Lands into prosperity and peace. Heaven smiled on him. Could he be such a monster? Words never came to her to answer him, so she remained silent.

A squeak on the floorboards told her he was coming. She stiffened, watching the doorway. When he appeared he was taller than she remembered as well. Ginrei fell to the floor, bowing on instinct. It was good to hide her face; she wasn't sure what her expression revealed. It would be better for him to see her as delicate and obeying, a good wife. Perhaps then she would earn enough respect that he would not abuse her in some way.

"You are Seiyo's daughter." Sesshomaru spoke to her, his voice quiet, gentle, as if he spoke to a child. It calmed Ginrei to hear it and she nodded where she was on the floor, biting her lips and fighting the tears that yet again pushed against the backs of her eyeballs. _Father is almost certainly dead now too…_

"What is your name?" he asked above her.

Ginrei's eyes were wide as she stared at the floor, reacting to Sesshomaru's question though he would never see it. She opened her mouth to speak and made a squeaking noise. Horrified she shut it again. It had been so long since she had used her voice; it was hoarse and raspy, barely recognizable as a voice at all.

"What did you say?" he asked. The floorboards creaked as he took a step closer.

Ginrei cringed and tried to clear her throat. "Ginrei." She croaked.

Sesshomaru repeated it after her, slowly, gently. "Ginrei." There was a pause throughout which Ginrei remained absolutely motionless except for her hesitant, nervous breathing. At long last he said, "Ginrei, sit up."

She obeyed, but she didn't lift her eyes to him. His gaze roving over her was nearly as heavy as her kimono. She felt heat rise to her face, though she hated it and found herself frowning, though she tried hurriedly to banish the expression.

Finally he spoke, "I have spared you from execution through marriage, Ginrei. I will provide for you. This palace is yours now." there was a short pause and then he added something else in a sterner, deeper voice. "If you try to escape I will have you executed. You are my wife." He paused again and when Ginrei risked a glance at him she saw that his face was emotionless but his eyes were troubled.

She bowed again, eager to hide her face from him. She tried to speak, "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru," but the words were so raspy they hardly sounded like a language at all.

"I am hiring maids to attend you, as well." he remarked, sounding a little lost, a tad uncertain. "Understand that as my wife I expect you to provide my heirs. After you have given me a son I will release you. You will be free."

She flinched at those words, pressing herself closer to the floor. As was expected of her as an unmated, unwed inuyoukai female, Ginrei was a virgin. The thought of consummating her marriage to Sesshomaru—who had acquired her rather than had a marriage arranged with a nice betrothal period and all the ceremony attached—frightened her and filled her with revulsion. The idea of birthing his pups also seemed unreal to her. To be used as a tool for her reproductive value made her feel ill. It would be nothing but an honor if Sesshomaru had asked her in the traditional way, through her father and her uncle and her family. Now she could not imagine it—but she knew she would have no choice.

"Do you understand?" he asked, his tone still deeper and dark.

She peeked cautiously at his feet. "Yes, my lord." She trembled, wondering when he would expect those heirs, whether he would lunge at her and expect the marriage to be consummated now….

For a moment her heart raced, a thrill of wild fear and panic tore through her—Sesshomaru took a step forward. But then he stopped and turned his back on her. "I am leaving tomorrow, Ginrei. Go to sleep. I will be gone when you wake again."

His feet walked away, vanishing into one of the other rooms. The floorboards creaked underneath his weight and then they fell silent as he ceased all movement. Ginrei stared along the floor, unable to move, barely able to think. Gradually her body began to relax as the tension and fear left her body behind.

The day would come when he would not walk away, but for now he had revealed himself as a gentle, perhaps even caring being. Ginrei blinked with surprise as she began to feel the first stirrings of something like acceptance or relief open within her. If this was to be her life than so be it, it was not too terrible of a curse.

Her children would be the heirs to the Western Lands. No marriage arranged by Nishiyori or her father could have done that.

* * *

When Sesshomaru arrived back at his castle in the Western Lands he called a brief audience with a few of the inuyoukai he knew. They rose form families that were often buried by the clan, inbred, weak, or sometimes power hungry. Sesshomaru called on the messengers he had come to trust most. In years past they had offered their aid in spying on Inuyasha's whereabouts and goings on. They had also kept an eye on what was happening within the inuyoukai clan, keeping Sesshomaru in the loop without actually forcing him to associate the clan itself.

It was these demons he sent to watch over Ginrei in the palace in the Isei province. Three of them. Two would always act as guards. The third would report in to Sesshomaru once every other week, telling him how she was recovering and if she should ask for him—a possibility that Sesshomaru very much doubted. Ginrei was shell-shocked, that much was clear. But she was also young, she would bounce back. He partially lamented not being able to spend time with her, but Rin was on his mind and Ginrei was nothing to him—and he didn't want her to become anything but _nothing._

When the guards had departed, Sesshomaru left the audience room to dine with Rin and Tsukiyume, as he had been doing for months now, since the hanyou girl had come to be his pupil. Shimofuri's expectation that his sister would be returned still annoyed Sesshomaru. He had taken her partially as a hostage, yes, but also because he had seen Rin's fondness for the hanyou girl when they had seen her. In a way Tsukiyume was not a hostage at all, but a pet for Rin, in Sesshomaru's mind.

She was also an experiment. Sesshomaru hoped that she would reveal the true nature of hanyou kind to him. Were all hanyous secretly very powerful creatures? Every day he awoke with the stump of his left arm as a stern reminder never to take any opponent too lightly. He had underestimated Inuyasha's ferocity and power. Even brandishing Tetsusaiga with no experience and no knowledge of how the sword worked, he had still managed to cleave Sesshomaru's arm off.

Thus far Tsukiyume was nothing truly out of the ordinary, though according to Rin the girl had changed remarkably over the months she had stayed within the castle. She was far less timid, even Sesshomaru could see that. But her fighting instructors reported only average ability, though her academic tutors were continually impressed with her intelligence.

Sesshomaru had to wonder if his brother would score well in a specific training, under an instructor. Probably not. Inuyasha would likely lose his temper and kill the trainer. So perhaps judging the two hanyous and their strengths based on the fighting _classes_ was a bad idea.

He emptied his thoughts as he entered the dining room. Rin and Tsukiyume were there already with pleasant expressions on their faces. It was the first time he had seen Rin in three days…_the first time I've seen her since I've been married._ He felt his body stiffening at the thought and tried to banish it, aware that as he took his seat next to Rin at the head of the table, she could sense it. Years of dealing with him had made her very sensitive to his moods. She almost made a hobby out of watching him, looking to detect his hidden feelings.

Tsukiyume was beginning to catch onto that hobby as well, he realized. The hanyou girls orange eyes followed him carefully. He saw her nostrils flare and felt a stab of alarm. _Is it possible that a hanyou's nose would be sharp enough to smell Ginrei on me?_ He had neglected to bathe since the marriage. It was entirely possible that the inuyoukai girl would have left a scent on him.

Nonchalantly he began to eat, offering neither of them even a greeting—though his eyes did flick to Rin, taking her in. She was aware of his gaze and began blushing. It was a well-established tradition between them that she would welcome him home later…personally.

Tsukiyume noted the undercurrent and made a face of disgust, but when Rin glared at her across the table the hanyou began forcing food more readily into her mouth, totally absorbed with eating.

"Sesshomaru-sama." Rin greeted him, smiling warmly. Sesshomaru glanced at her once and then looked swiftly away, focusing on the food in front of him. _Fish._ It made him think of the stinky lake that he had been forced to smell all night. And thinking of the palace made him remember Ginrei…

He picked up the chopsticks and investigated the food, in spite of the fact that he didn't feel the least bit hungry.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" Tsukiyume asked, and he paused, staring down at his food. He couldn't lift his eyes to look at her. The memory of her nostrils flaring was still fresh in his mind. What if she asked him about it? He decided to ignore her and push more food into his mouth slowly.

After a moment when he hadn't answered her Tsukiyume posed her question anyway. "Lord Sesshomaru, have you seen Shishi-sama? Has he won the war in the Middle Lands?"

_That_ was a question he could answer! He lifted his eyes confidently now and faced her. "The civil war in the Middle Lands is over. Shimofuri and your uncle were the victors."

Tsukiyume ducked her head, bowing politely, "Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru. May I ask, was my brother healthy?"

"He was fine." Sesshomaru answered blandly.

The next words spilled out of the hanyou girl rapidly, "Does that mean I can go home now?" and then her eyes flew to Rin apologetically. "I-I mean…"

"You're staying here." Sesshomaru answered at once.

Her ears flattened, her face fell. "I want to see my brother…"

"He may visit you any time he wishes." Sesshomaru reiterated, allowing a hint of irritation in his tone. How many times did he have to tell her and her brother this?

Rin spoke now, unable to hide her sadness. "Aren't you happy here, Tsuki? Your lessons, I've heard you're doing wonderfully!"

Tsukiyume's ears were still lying flat. "Lady Rin," she spoke formally, "I am a hostage…"

Sesshomaru and Rin spoke then as one, "You are not a hostage." Rin blinked with surprise and covered her mouth to hide her quiet grin. "My apologies Sesshomaru-sama."

Sesshomaru ignored her, though the outburst amused him too. He didn't want to talk about Tsukiyume's staying or leaving, he only wanted to _settle_ it and let the hanyou know she had _no choice,_ she was staying in the castle and she'd better get accustomed to it.

Tsukiyume looked between them, her orange eyes pained. "Perhaps I might visit shishi-sama…?"

"You may not." Sesshomaru responded, blandly again. He felt her hurt gaze on him but he ignored her and once again started to eat. The rice was dry and tasteless on his tongue.

Rin sighed, slowly. "Maybe Sesshomaru-sama should consider giving Tsukiyume her request."

He didn't even bother dignifying Rin's request with words. He threw her a glare over the rim of his cup as he drank to wash down the thick, lumpy rice. He needed to find their chef and fire him.

"Perhaps it would be entertaining if I went with Tsukiyume. I would enjoy the chance to travel for a time…" Rin was saying, quietly, gently, so as not to anger or irritate him.

He stared at her, letting her see that he _was_ irritated, he _was_ getting angry. Then he again tackled the food to avoid responding verbally.

"It would be safe." Tsukiyume added, cautiously, throwing Rin a quick, querying glance. "And I think it would be good for Lady Rin…" Tsukiyume's eyebrows shot up into her forehead, "Shishi-sama may know of something to help you!" she exclaimed, staring openly at Rin now, as if Sesshomaru had vanished from the room.

Rin lowered her eyes, embarrassedly. She understood that Tsukiyume was thinking about the miscarriages, and that Shimofuri had been around when their mother, the former demon leader Taikokajin, had been pregnant with Tsukiyume. If there was a secret to keeping a hanyou baby safe within her for nine months, then Rin would jump at the chance to go.

Though Sesshomaru understood some of what was happening between the two women, he pretended to take no notice at all. Instead he tossed out his final verdict. "You will both be staying here." He did not look at either of them. Another scoop from the chopsticks from the plate to his mouth, though the rice was sticky like glue, thick and tasteless on his tongue. He vowed not to just fire the chef but to kill him.

"Sesshomaru-sama," Rin spoke with a deeper, distant voice that he knew meant she was serious and swiftly becoming upset with him. "Rin would like to go." It was her childish form of speech, but it also worked to effectively distance her from the demand. But it was still a demand, she was still challenging him.

He wasn't about to play her game. There were other things at stake aside from the dim chance that Shimofuri would suddenly kidnap Rin. That was unlikely to happen and all of them knew it, the young heir would be risking far more than just insulting Sesshomaru. If he were to take Rin as a hostage and keep Tsukiyume Sesshomaru would turn his armies on the young lord and surely destroy him. But already Shimofuri owed Sesshomaru too much. He would not do anything to harm Rin and he would keep her safe—but it was not Rin's safety that truly concerned Sesshomaru at that moment.

It was what Shimofuri might tell Tsukiyume while they visited, and what Tsukiyume would surely then tell Rin…he could already hear the young lord with his young blue eyes, appearing good natured and innocent. It would be nothing of that sort, however.

Sesshomaru was aware how the deal he had struck with the younger lord had troubled him, of the curiosity hidden behind those blue eyes. Shimofuri would leap at the chance to ask Rin about it—and in doing so he would destroy the secrecy Sesshomaru had worked to keep. Perhaps that would be part of the plan, to punish Sesshomaru for the great pains that Shimofuri and Sasugainu had had to go through—giving up the Isei province, hiring the scholar, sparing one of the girls, the ceremony, the castles…

No, there was no way he could allow Tsukiyume and Rin to see Shimofuri so unrestrictedly. Even if he went with them the chances that Shimofuri would still get word to Rin through Tsukiyume…the chance was too great.

He lifted his gaze to her, narrowed and stern, unflinching. "You will both remain here."

Silence reigned at the table afterwards, and when Sesshomaru caught sight of Rin's eyes again he regretted it. Her eyes were the same deep dark pools as when she cried over their lost daughters. He slaughtered the stirrings of guilt in his gut. _It is for her own good._

And that was the end of it.

* * *

A/N: And a great teaser for next time!

"_Sesshomaru-sama…" she purred, gazing up at him. Her eyes were lit by the dim coals of the brazier in the one corner. She wrapped her legs around his hips and Sesshomaru noted detachedly that she wasn't even wearing socks. _


	4. Ignorance Is Bliss

A/N: As I am writing this I am suffering from a nasty, swollen spot on my hip. Tonight I actually created this story, posted the prologue, though as you can see I am actually currently writing several chapters ahead. By the time you read this chapter my hip will no longer be swollen from where I bashed it while I was waitressing. I just find that interesting how in a way this writing is a sort of time machine. You are all able to look back on my personal past while this piece effectively leaps forward in time. Nice…yes, I think and muse too much to myself. But that's what writers are for!

Disclaimer: I do not own them

* * *

**Ignorance is Bliss**

The inuyoukai that Sesshomaru had ordered to report in on his _wife_ in the secret palace on the lake was commonly called Daken. It was not really his name, but it was what everyone called him and how the grizzled inuyoukai introduced himself. He was of a lowly family and the dog demon clan never afforded him any respect. He'd left them long ago, fed up and disgusted much as Sesshomaru had been. It was this likeness that drove Daken into Sesshomaru's service, and in spite of his low rank, Daken was a very loyal and hard-working warrior.

New he related what the humans told him of Ginrei in the palace on the lake.

"They tell me she wakes in the night, screaming. She is plagued by nightmares. She refuses the calming teas that are offered to her. The cook can barely get her to eat or to drink. She spends most of her day sleeping."

Sesshomaru found it was becoming harder and harder to appear unconcerned at Daken's words. It had been four weeks since he had left Ginrei alone in the palace. His new _wife_ had never tried to run away, but she was suffering nonetheless. The first report that Daken had given him had not been quite as dire. Sesshomaru had hoped that the time alone, on the tranquility of the lake, would draw the inuyoukai girl's memories away from the terror of her recent past. He hoped that she would come to terms with her situation and be ready for him upon his next visit.

The sooner he could gain the heirs he needed for the Western Lands, the sooner he could be rid of the secret and its horrible weight on him. The thought of lying with a different female at night disturbed him, but it needed to be done. Heirs did not magically appear out of thin air.

He had only one true worry however concerning the inuyoukai girl. "Do they believe she will die or try to take her own life?"

Daken's jaw tightened. "Of course she should have died with all the rest of Nishiyori's brood, but I know she is watched carefully, Sesshomaru." Daken was one of a handful of creatures that could dare to address Sesshomaru without any proper titles or due respect. This was because they had known one another for many, many years, and fought beside one another in several wars. Daken was old enough that, as a youth, before Sesshomaru had been old enough to think clearly, Daken had fought under Inutaisho's lead before, defending the Western Lands.

"She must be kept alive." Sesshomaru allowed the rumble of a threat to enter his voice. There would be dire consequences if the girl died without producing the heir he needed.

Daken nodded, his face set in a hard scowl, but that expression was likely there because the old demon suffered arthritis, not because he was actually making a face at Sesshomaru. "How is your lady? The human."

Now Sesshomaru threw the old inuyoukai a cold, withering glare. "She is well enough."

The old demon cracked a grin that was without any mirth. Several of his teeth were missing but his canines, though graying and decayed, were still defiantly present. "You haven't told her, have you Lord Sesshomaru?" his tone was mildly mocking and Sesshomaru bristled and then regretted it when he saw Daken's eyes crinkle with amusement.

"The secret is what kills, Sesshomaru." Daken started in a gentler voice, sighing, "She will understand your need. She cannot change the way things are, the way they need to be. But she _will_ hate you for leaving her in the dark. Humans hate being blinded like that, they have terrible eyes."

"Do not speak again." Sesshomaru warned him, amber eyes narrowed murderously.

Daken was still grinning defiantly. He bowed low, "Lord Sesshomaru."

* * *

"She's gone mad." The human woman was middle aged, messy and all gray. The lines around her mouth and lips were flexing currently as Daken stared at her. She was a worrier, he could tell easily from those lines. Also from the way she twisted her hands together, rubbing, wringing. The motions should have hurt her or caused discomfort. They probably did actually, in the form of arthritis—but the woman was so tense in his presence and with the topic that she didn't notice her own actions.

"She tried to kill herself." Daken didn't pose it as a question, he had anticipated this.

The worrying woman nodded emphatically. Her hands twisted on themselves, her fingers looked misshapen, some parts too big, others too small.

"Did she hurt herself?" he asked.

The woman shook her head. "She had not actually done anything when I found her. She had the knife—" the woman held her hands out in front of her, miming holding a cylindrical object and pointing it at her throat, "—like this. Ready to do it, but she isn't _really_ trying. She…" the woman began wringing her hands yet again now that the miming was done. "She does not want to live, but cannot bring herself to die at her own hand."

Daken grunted. It had only been a few days since he'd gotten back from visiting Sesshomaru. Now it appeared he would need to head right back. He wondered idly if Sesshomaru would kill the inuyoukai girl for having attempted to kill herself. It was amusing, he thought, smirking.

The woman stared at him with disbelief and then frowned looking away. She couldn't understand his glee of course. Daken straightened up, becoming serious. "Let me speak with her."

"She is married." The woman shot back, appalled. For one man to speak alone to another's wife—it was incredibly unseemly and the last thing she wanted to have to do was wring her hands in front of Sesshmaru explaining to him why the inuyoukai girl was pregnant when he—her husband—had never touched her.

This also amused Daken, as many things did. He grinned as he answered her. "I don't need to speak with her alone. You may accompany us by all means." When she still appeared doubtful he added, "It will not take long."

Slowly the woman sighed and rose to her feet. Daken noted that she had yet to quit twisting and rubbing her hands together with nervousness. She led him into the palace and up the stairs to the farthest bedroom from the stairway and the balcony. It was a brightly lit room, filled with a sweet scent of flowers and herbs. There was a younger woman in attendance, sewing quietly as the inuyoukai girl slept on the futon. The maid blinked up at Daken as he entered, falling into a startled bow and dropping her sewing.

The heavier tread in the room made Ginrei move in the bed. She opened bleary, sleepy eyes to look at him. Daken saw no recognition in her eyes, in fact he saw very little even in the way of consciousness or thought.

Solemn now, he knelt at the edge of her bed and bowed. "Lady Sesshomaru." The improvised title bothered him, tickling his amusement again. He snorted as he sat up to hide it. "I understand you are unhappy. May I ask if one of your reasons is loneliness?"

She stared at him with the palest blue eyes he'd ever seen. Slowly her brow furrowed, as if he'd asked the question in a foreign language. "Loneliness?" she repeated in a scratchy, unclear voice. She frowned at it and lifted one hand to hide her face from him from beneath her covers.

Daken grunted, nodding to himself. She had not answered his question truly, but the scratch in her voice and what he knew of where she came from told him enough. Part of her madness, the inability to overcome her loss and accept her circumstances—which were not entirely bad, despite the grave dishonor of her family—was brought on by social deprivation. When she had lived under Nishiyori's roof there would have always been others, women mostly, but always kin. She would have enjoyed talking, gossip, song, games, laughter, and lessons in whatever her father and other male relatives saw fit.

Now she was confined to the small palace on the lake, with no one to talk to but human maids and distant inuyoukai guards. She could stare out at the lake all day and all night and think about nothing else but her loss. Sesshomaru had left her alone in the palace to give her time to heal, but it was in fact like leaving her wounds untreated, open and festering.

He rose to his feet and left the room at once. At the door he stretched his legs, preparing for the long journey in his true form across the Isei and into the mountains of the Western Lands where Sesshomaru's castle was nestled. The nervous woman ran after him panting, her gray hair flying around her face like spider webs.

"Sir! Sir! Where are you going? What will I tell the girl you are doing for her?"

He grinned, showing his abused and mostly missing teeth. "Tell her I'm going to fetch her husband to give her a good time." And then he hurried out and over the bridge and vanished into the shadow of the snowy gardens beyond.

* * *

Rin was waiting in the darkness of the room. She was fresh from her bath; Sesshomaru could scent the imported oils that had been combed into her hair, rubbed into her skin. He took a moment, pausing just inside the door, to take those scents in, letting them brush the most primal, basic parts of his brain…

She heard him at the door, sensed the increased light from behind her in the hallway. He knew this not because she turned to look but because her back stiffened, arching slightly, and because her scent spiked with anticipation. "Sesshomaru-sama," she purred, using the woman's voice she cultivated for quiet, sensuous moments.

When she turned to search the room for him in the dark she could not see him. Sesshomaru would've smirked at the disappointment he saw etched on her face but it might've given him away. The flash of his white fangs in the dark of the shadow would be a sure way to draw her eyes. One thing Daken had said was true about humans; they truly had abysmal night vision. It bordered on ridiculous.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" she called again, and this time she shifted and rose to her feet slowly. As her body turned Sesshomaru was able to see that she had already undone her robes. They fell loosely around her, half-off her shoulders and peaking open in a V-shape as they fell away towards the floor. Sesshomaru's keen night vision could make out the white fullness of one breast partially exposed by the loose robes. (A/N: Gasp! I'm so naughty!)

She had pinned her hair up messily, exposing her shoulders and neck. The coals from the brazier nearby cast a golden orange glow that suffused her skin with the light. She seemed more than human then, but not as a youkai either. She was something else, spiritual, powerful, beautiful. If he'd had such a word or idea he might've said angelic, cherubic. Heavenly though, yes, that was the right word. But he had some very impure thoughts and plans for her, as it was clear she did as well.

He decided not to wait any longer. Like a predator he raced out of the shadows, pouncing on his prey. She cried out in surprise and lifted her arms in self-defense but Sesshomaru bowled her over, knocking her off her feet only to catch her before she could hit the ground. The entire motion had been done so fast that he was only a blur, yet it was completely within his control.

When he pinned her on the bed beneath him the robe had fallen wide open. She was flushed and breathing hard already, though he'd barely touched her. (A/N: yeah right about here I start getting antsy, like, uh oh, crossing the line, even though I know almost all of you, probably all, are screaming NO it's fine, keep going! Hehe, it is good to be evil.)

"Sesshomaru-sama…" she purred, gazing up at him. Her eyes were lit by the dim coals of the brazier in the one corner. She wrapped her legs around his hips and Sesshomaru noted detachedly that she wasn't even wearing socks.

That observation brought on another memory: the heavy and lavish ceremonial kimono he'd packed and transported with him hurriedly to the Isei province, the inuyoukai girl lying limp in his arms after the wedding, and his sudden realization and regret that he had forgotten to pack socks. His new wife had been married barefoot (A/N: Of course I am assuming, perhaps incorrectly, that they are married in socks and not barefoot).

The guilt swamped him from nowhere, attacking like a thousand tiny bees. Each pinprick hurt, but a thousand could kill. And yet, despite his inward anxiety, there was no sign of it outwardly except his pause as he stared down at Rin.

It was enough to reveal something to her.

She tilted her head concernedly and raised one hand, brushing it against his cheek. The touch broke Sesshomaru out of his reverie. He blinked once and abruptly remembered where he was and what was about to happen—Rin's aroused scent invaded his nose and shot straight to his brain.

He let the deep, chest-rumbling growl spill out of him at last and clutched onto Rin, rolling over the bed and the rich furs.

* * *

When Rin awoke she was delighted to find Sesshomaru still lying beside her, seemingly asleep. Sometimes he would leave her before dawn, going about his duties before she had woken, or perhaps avoiding being seen by the maids—he had a nasty habit of resting above the covers while being very nude.

She took advantage of the moment he'd given her, sitting up partially and leaning to examine his face. There were only a few fine lines, he seemed to be ageless. Unlike a human he never shaved, he grew no facial hair. The crescent moon on his forehead, the reddish pigment in his cheeks…she knew them close up now after her long years at his side. They had the appearance of being tattoo-like; they were just like the rest of his skin but a different color. The crescent moon was slightly raised, more like a mole than a tattoo.

She traced his pointed hears with her fingers, the lines of muscles on his neck, the point of his chin, the shape of his lips…

And then of course, she realized he wasn't truly sleeping.

The demon pounced on her once more, pressing against her, growling low and so deep she could feel the vibrations in her chest. He had just started to pull her over on top of him—the position was one they often adopted because Sesshomaru had only one arm (A/N: wow, ouch, that would suck! Only one arm I mean)—when a whiny little voice came floating into the room from down the hall, it was shouting, "Lord Sesshomaru! Lord Sesshomaru!"

The pitter patter of little toad feet was growing steadily stronger.

Sesshomaru's growl of pleasure and seduction turned into one with homicidal thoughts. As he pulled away from her he didn't speak but his amber eyes firmly shouted: "I'll kill him."

The toad was down the hall, sliding open the screen door to Sesshomaru's own chamber…but of course Sesshomaru was rarely there sleeping innocently. Jaken always made sure to shout a lot before he opened a door, and then always to flatten himself while covering his eyes. He had intruded far, far too many intimate moments than was likely safe.

Now as he prostrated himself and waited for several seconds, he knew that he'd chosen the wrong room. He always tried Sesshomaru's chambers first—just because he knew his lord was rarely there. That gave Sesshomaru time to dress in Rin's room, which was where he usually was.

The toad sighed and then hopped to his feet and rushed back down the hall, heading for Rin's chambers now. "Lord Sesshomaru! Lord Sesshomaru!" he knelt down at Rin's screen door and stretched his clawed, reptilian-ish fingers for it, but the screen slid open before he could touch it. He flattened his face to the floor at once.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" he shouted again, still smashed against the floor apologetically.

"Haven't I told you before, Jaken, that I would kill you if you disturbed me early in the morning like this again?" only Sesshomaru's eyes spoke the fullness of his threat to the toad, his voice remained uninterested and distant. He had managed to dress himself in a bland white robe, a morning robe. It wasn't his own; it was too small and narrow.

"Yes, my lord, you have!" Jaken squeaked, "But Lord Sesshomaru, this matter is urgent! You told me always to alert you when that inuyoukai Daken comes to meet with you! And he's here, asking to see you, lord."

Sesshomaru stepped forward, making sure to stamp on the toad as he left Rin's room. Jaken squawked, but he remained where he was, always obedient. Sesshomaru slid the door behind him closed and began to walk away from Rin in her room and Jaken still prostrated before it. The toad leapt to his feet, pleading for permission to follow him ad for forgiveness as always. Sesshomaru ignored him, his thoughts troubled with more pressing concerns. _What has happened that Daken has returned so soon?_

* * *

By the time that Sesshomaru reached the audience room, after stopping to quickly dress in more appropriate robes, the combination of irritation and guilt that had awoken within him was beginning to drive him insane. He took a seat before Daken and found that staring at the old, grizzled inuyoukai made him want to scowl. There was a foul taste in the back of his throat. "Speak, Daken. Why have you come back?"

Daken shifted on his knees, trying to ease his tired, arthritic limbs. "Your _wife_ tried to take her own life, Sesshomaru."

The taste in Sesshomaru's mouth deepened. "Did she succeed?" part of him hoped that she had, though he could tell by Daken's underlying tone of worry that she was still alive.

"No, as I told you, she is always watched. One of the women was able to stop her. But—" he stopped, bowing a little and clearing his throat, "Lord Sesshomaru, you must understand this inuyoukai girl was one of Nishiyori's brood. She has never before been alone without other inuyoukai her entire life. You have left her in that palace to rot with her misery. She _will_ kill herself, whether it be by knife or by slow pathetic starvation—mark my words—she will do herself in."

Sesshomaru stiffened. The corners of his lips turned downward once and stayed that way unhappily in a half-expression that revealed the depth of his agitation. "Are you suggesting that she should be killed?"

Daken snorted, frowning. "Not unless that's what you want. But after all the fuss—no. I'm saying that she needs company—your company."

This apparently surprised Sesshomaru. His face blanked of all emotion, he didn't even blink. Daken worked very hard to control his own expression, to keep from reacting with amusement.

"She has never been kept alone, Sesshomaru. Your _wife_ needs social stimulation from other inuyoukai to recover from her losses. _If_ you wish her to recover and give you healthy heirs, I would suggest you pay her a social visit." He didn't believe that it was within Sesshomaru's nature to be comforting. Despite the fluffy thing the demon lord carted around with him over one shoulder he was actually cold and distant with most creatures—not usually prone to violence unless provoked in most instances. How was he going to inspire the inuyoukai girl with a will to live?

"I cannot spare her much time. There are many things that require my attention." Sesshomaru replied blandly.

Daken cackled hoarsely and Sesshomaru bristled at the sound, noticeably. "The only thing," Daken began through his laughter, "That requires your attention here, Lord Sesshomaru, is that human of yours."

Sesshomaru pinned him with narrowed amber eyes. "You would do well to learn some manners, Daken." He warned.

"Yah," he grunted, "So they tell me. But we both know it's the truth. I just brought it out in the open, Lord Sesshomaru." He bowed, smirking all the way down and all the way back up. "If you order it I will go back to the palace and execute her myself—but if not…"

There was a pause between them as Daken waited for Sesshomaru's final word on his wife's fate. Sesshomaru appeared to lose focus on the grizzled old inuyoukai. His amber gaze wandered around the audience room, admiring the golden _fusuma,_ the brushwork on some of the ink paintings there. At last he said, "You are to leave her alive, Daken. I will be visiting her within the morrow."

Daken hid the smile on his lips by bowing again. "I thank you, Lord Sesshomaru." He hadn't wanted to kill the girl; it really would be a shame. She was a beautiful thing, fragile and delicate like a flower. Indeed, Nishiyori had likely had a huge treasure trove of inuyoukai girls at his disposal. It was a shame that most of them had died. Daken was delighted that one had been spared, unwittingly, by Sesshomaru. If he had been several hundred years younger he might've asked Sesshomaru to terminate the marriage and give the girl to him instead, but he was old, the time for girls, mates, and wives, had come and gone in his long life.

He wasted little time after receiving Sesshomaru's final word. He hurried out of the castle and donned his true form again, stretching only briefly before he ran out for the Isei province and the secret palace.

Sesshomaru, meanwhile, stayed inside the audience room, conflicted by his own decisions. A maid stepped into the room, assuming by the silence that both Sesshomaru and Daken had exited and ended their meeting, only to gasp with fright at seeing her lord sitting much like a statue in the room. She begged his forgiveness and excused herself from the room without ever getting a reply from Sesshomaru. Guards walked to and fro outside the audience room, muttering occasionally to themselves about tired feet and bitter old wives.

After nearly an hour Sesshomaru rose to his feet and at last exited the room. He found the toad Jaken in his small personal chambers, dozing off on his tiny, personalized futon. The toad sprang instantly awake when Sesshomaru appeared at the door, called to attention by some inner sixth sense that alerted him to almost everything Sesshomaru did (except perhaps when he walked away while Jaken was still musing to himself).

"Lord Sesshomaru!" the toad fell at once into a bow, mumbling apologies. He almost certainly believed that he was about to be punished for disturbing his lord while he was recreating with Rin, yet again.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru began, "I will be leaving this evening for the Isei province. There are some confidential matters of the civil war there that must be attended to. You will accompany me."

The toad's yellow eyes bugged out with shock. "Yes! Yes my lord, of course, certainly!"

Sesshomaru was already walking away by the end of Jaken's wild exclamations of acceptance. Jaken stared after him, still shocked, yet already the wheels in his head were beginning to turn. Soon enough he would know just what it was that his lord was hiding away in the Isei province and why the war in the Middle Lands had been so important…

* * *

Outside of Rin's room, Sesshomaru hesitated. It was a crime to slip out of Rin's room and then meet with Daken, give his word that he would leave Rin for a time for the benefit of another female…

The niggling voice in the back of his mind, a conscience he hadn't been aware he'd had—well no, actually that wasn't true. There had been many times when that conscience had stayed his hand, kept him on one side of a line of cruelty that he truly had yet to pass. He was not a demon that tortured others, nor did he really go out _looking_ for trouble for the most part. He craved power, yes, but no more than most demons. The biggest example was probably Inuyasha. There had been many times when he could easily have killed his half-brother—when the hanyou was just a baby, when he was newly orphaned, even once Inuyasha was matured enough to defend himself—but he never had. It boiled down to conscience, he owed it to his father, and he honored that.

That and it had never truly been his style to kill newborns or those that were truly defenseless.

But now, he was beginning to feel that he'd crossed the line. Rin had always understood that as the lord of the Western Lands he would need to find a full blooded youkai to bear full blooded offspring. Any hanyou children that Rin bore him would be useless as far as inheriting the Western Lands—not because they would make bad rulers, but because it would be difficult for them to sire heirs of their own and the bloodline would be lost.

Sesshomaru could not allow that to happen, he owed his father and all of his ancestors that much. And it was part of his own quest for power. He would never allow his territory pass to someone else as long as he had strength left. The Western Lands would fall to his heirs, his bloodline.

Rin understood all of this. There was no reason that he should hide the truth from her—and yet he found the thought of revealing what he had done entirely undesirable. Her pain already in the loss of their offspring over and over again was difficult for him to cope with. He was, as Daken rightly knew, a creature not given to comforting displays. He was like snuggling a pincushion. Even Inuyasha had a better grasp on how to handle personal grief.

Sesshomaru was a lord, not a lover at his core. He could care, he could wish to comfort Rin, but in the end he was helpless to do it.

The thought of bringing her more pain only worked to trouble him hopelessly. He knew logically that she would find out. There was no real way to keep a thing like this from her forever. Eventually, if all went well, Ginrei would bare him a suitable heir, and then Sesshomaru would have to take up a fatherly role to raise it. Of course that meant bringing the newborn into the castle in the Western Lands. He couldn't very well lie to Rin about his own heir. Then she would know, and then she would be most angry with him…

Sesshomaru flinched openly, just thinking about it. Yes, he concluded, he would have to tell her the truth _now…_

He stepped forward and slid the door to Rin's bed chambers open. She was sleeping under the covers peacefully, still as naked as when he had left her. He paused just inside the room admiring the way the new day sunlight streamed in from the windows and lit the room. The light bounced off the walls, making them glow warmly. The anxiety from his meeting with Daken melted away.

He made a move to step forward, to crawl onto the bed beside her—but when he made out her face, peaceful, smiling slightly in her sleep, her black hair spread out around her wildly from the night before—Sesshomaru froze. He pushed himself inwardly, trying to overcome the invisible barrier within him, but it was unrelenting. He could not face her; he could not wake her from that sleep. Whatever sweet dreams she was having, he could not bring himself to wake her and tell her something that would only hurt her…

Slowly he turned and left the room, half-gliding like a wraith. The sliding door closed behind him gently and the demon lord left Rin in her sleep, blissful and ignorant.

* * *

_A/N: I have nothing really to put in here for a teaser b/c during the holidays I've done jack crap with myself as far as writing has gone. I really, really need to be back at my college, doing the English thing properly. Discipline and practice perfect any art form. And I believe writing to be an art, though I am one of the least artistic ppl around, I'm just creative. Or at least I like to think I am. But you will all be hearing from me, rest assured...I just decided I had to update SOMETHING and this was what I had...I hope you enjoyed it :-D_


	5. Secret Letters

A/N: wow, sorry it's been a while. I am living life in the dorms now, no partying despite what you all may think, but it has left me more distracted from writing even still, which is sad. But I have begun to manage again. Outside of my bedroom at home I wasn't comfortable writing, and for me writing has always been a thing I did in seclusion. Now with a roommate all the time with me, it was very, very hard to teach myself to write in spite of it. I hope this is up to my usual standards then.

The beginning of this story is more about Ginrei and her struggle with coming to terms with the fact that she's still alive, and about Sesshomaru's inner struggle with what to do with her, whether to give up on her or to risk some emotional attachment by trying to pull her back from the brink himself. Rin and Tsuki will come more to the fore later, when Ginrei's fate is steadier.

* * *

Last Chapter: Sesshomaru wimped out and didn't tell Rin even though we all know he should have. Daken, a messenger inuyoukai under Sesshomaru's employ, relayed word that Ginrei isn't doing very well, she needs company, she's depressed, she's trying to commit suicide. Sesshomaru told Jaken he's coming with him. And then of course Sesshy and Rin did the nasty. whoohoo...

* * *

**Secret Letters**

"Wake up my lady!" the women were shouting as one, loudly, trying to rouse her. Ginrei put one hand over her ear and smashed it against her head, trying to drown them out. The bed was warm, soft, and filled with comforting dreams of her family. In her dreams they lived and surrounded her, holding her, laughing, sharing all of the stories they used to tell. She was not married to a strange lord that she never saw in her dreams. Her dreams left room for the wonderment of her childhood, the cherishing of forbidden crushes on cousins who called her names for being a girl.

One of the human women pulled the covers from around her, roughly. Ginrei looked up then, curling her body into a ball in response to the sudden cold. She threw swift glares at the women around her, looking for her blankets sleepily.

"You must get up!" one of them was shouting, the fattest, the one that also brought her meals—and the one that had stopped her from taking her own life. She frowned with renewed energy.

"Your husband is coming to visit you! You must be bathed! You have not bathed in days, my lady!" a different woman was speaking now, chittering away in her high voice. Ginrei despised her for her energy, for her words. _Your husband is coming to see you._ She thought bitterly of the tall inuyoukai lord, Sesshomaru of the Western Lands. He had a handsome gaze with his amber, honey colored eyes, but he was the one who had disgraced her to the exile of the palace, to living without her family, to dishonoring her.

In the weeks since she had last seen him, Ginrei's feeling toward him vacillated wildly. One moment she longed to see him to prove to herself that she was in fact still alive. The next minute she dreaded seeing him for fear of what he would want from her, if he would try to touch her or demand that she perform some sort of act to pleasure him. It was his right as her husband, of course, she could not truly refuse him, but the idea made her tremble with fear and revulsion.

The women began pulling at her, tugging at the loose sleeping robe she was wearing. They tore it free and began trying to dress her in a thicker robe for walking to and from the baths. She watched them dress her as if from a distance, as if her body were nothing but a puppet being manipulated by the maids. They dragged her away to the bath where they had already poured heated water.

They stripped her and helped her into the water. For a time they let her soak, though always two of the women waited, watching her in case she tried to drown herself. Ginrei didn't have the presence of mind to come up with the idea. She sat where she was, eyes barely opened, feeling the warmth of the water. It was a great, gentle pleasure, one that helped to banish her depression almost as well as the bed did. She let the warm, moist vapors enter her lungs in deep, long draughts, lulling her slowly into sleep.

It didn't last nearly long enough. The women swamped her only a few minutes later, jabbering and clucking like chickens after a grasshopper. Ginrei followed them in a daze, allowing herself be let out of the tub and watching as the women scurried around her, reminding her of busy ants, all with purpose, even if they were thoughtless and unintelligent. Ginrei envied them that purpose, longed to share it again. She watched them with narrowed, envious silver eyes.

The maids dressed her in a white kimono, simple, yet elegant. It felt too cold to Ginrei, not right for the season, and as they lead her to the sitting room—where she would sit and eat with her husband—she had a horrifying thought. What if this was a robe for the night, not meant to stay on her skin long at all? Was this the night her husband would consummate their marriage?

She shivered as the maids opened the sliding doors to the verandah that circled the small palace on the lake, allowing a breeze to float in from over the water. It stank still to Ginrei's nose, but since her initial arrival the scent had improved as the sludge and dying debris in the garden was slowly cleaned by the human workers. With her acute youkai ears Ginrei listened to their words throughout the day, envying their freedom, despite their low social positions and the grunt labor of tending the gardens.

The breeze touched her silver hair, still wet from the bath and she shivered, suddenly stopping all movement, even her breath. She knew instinctively that her husband had arrived in the palace. There was another youkai presence. She fought the desire to turn and look for him, for the face she both dreaded and longed for, the simple presence of another youkai—

And then she heard the high pitched voice and small, quick footsteps and realized there were two youkai presences, but only one of them was inuyoukai. When she inhaled, passed the smell of the lake on the breeze and the gardens outside, she could make out the scent of a male—but he was lowly, weakened, and sweating.

It was not her husband after all.

For a moment she felt cold with a rush of relief, and then was swamped with hot perspiration. Her face burned. Where was her husband? Why had he sent a commoner? Why was there some other youkai—she concentrated, narrowing her eyes, seemingly, at the dull green-blue of the lake outside and determined the identity of the other youkai—a frog? A toad youkai? Perhaps it was a fortune teller, she thought. Small youkai such as that often perfected the craft and went to work for powerful warlords, like Sesshomaru.

When Ginrei had reached a certain age, leaving childhood behind for adolescence, her father Seiyo and her uncle the warlord Nishiyori had arranged for just such a thing. It was tradition that, with so many daughters, they would have their fortunes read and handed out. Some were set for marriage as breeders, some for education and then marriage. Some to act more as diplomats, servants, or artists for entertainment. Others still were deemed teachers. Ginrei's fortune was read as murky, unclear. Her future was interpreted as being left wide open. Seiyo and Nishiyori decided that they would educate Ginrei then, until such a time as a marriage might present itself.

That open fortune seemed a mockery now. Ginrei was a prisoner in multiple ways. A prisoner within her own tortured mind, as well as physically alone inside the secret lake palace. Ghosts made up her family; violence waited when she closed her eyes or tried to think coherently. The massacre had colored her life now, destroyed it and changed her. She was no butterfly any longer, she wasn't living, merely existing in a perpetual state of loss…

There were no outward tears for the frog/toad youkai and the commoner to see when they entered the room. Ginrei allowed herself to see them briefly before she bowed, but then she closed her mind off. The commoner was Daken, the toad was a self-important green creature with big eyes and a thick cane he could barely support. It might have been proper, as the wife of Sesshomaru, to offer them greetings as her guests, but Ginrei felt no such inclination.

"Lord Jaken," as always Daken's voice held its ironic, mocking tone as he began the introduction, "may I introduce Lady Ginrei, Lord Sesshomaru's wife."

Ginrei had not yet risen from her bow, but remained lethargically on the floor. Even so, she sensed the toad's shock. He flinched, he choked, he demanded, "Wh-ewhat? Wife?"

Daken answered with patience and without humor in his voice. "Yes. Lord Sesshomaru's wife."

"Sit up girl!" the toad called, gulping.

Ginrei did as he commanded, but she did not lift her face to him. Jaken shifted in his spot across the room from her, leaning forward on his little frog knees. "Look up at me!" despite his high voice and the commands he was issuing, Ginrei noticed he was not harsh. She obeyed, letting her gaze rest on the toad's dull brown-gray robes, on the thick, gnarled staff.

He blinked widely and addressed her directly. "You have fair hair!" then he looked back at Daken, "How is this possible? Daken," the toad stumbled slightly, uncertain of how much respect to offer the inuyoukai in his title. "Lord Sesshomaru cannot marry close within his family—when was he married at all!"

Daken was struggling not to smirk, but for him the expression was perpetual, almost constant. "Lord Jaken, I assure you, Lady Ginrei is not related to Lord Sesshomaru. They are properly distanced from one another."

"When did this marriage occur? Why wasn't I informed?" Jaken demanded, with no certain amount of hurt in his tone.

"The marriage occurred several weeks ago, my lord." Daken nodded his head once.

Ginrei watched the toad's head dip and wobble as he absorbed the information. It wasn't long before he had another protest. "But what about Lady Rin? Surely—" the toad stopped speaking for a moment and made inaudible sounds of worry and fear. "Rin isn't going to like this! Does she know about it?"

"No. I have counseled Lord Sesshomaru to speak with her on it, but he has refused to listen, apparently."

Ginrei listened intently now. This was entirely new information to her. Gossip that intrigued her. Sesshomaru had a second female at his beck and call, and Ginrei, the wife, was the secret. She allowed herself to stare more frankly at the toad and the commoner, interested.

"How did this happen? Why did Lord Sesshomaru…?" Jaken was flabbergasted, hardly able to speak.

Daken continued to be lightly amused with the entire situation and answered in that tone, "At the end of the war with the Middle Lands. She is one of Nishiyori's kin. Her father was Onshoku Seiyo."

Jaken fell silent, the huge eyes flicking back and forth around the room as he struggled to think through this new information. At last he turned toward Ginrei and made eye contact. "My lady," he offered her a bow, "I am Lord Sesshomaru's most loyal retainer. It will be an honor to be at your service."

Ginrei watched the toad flatten himself into a bow before her. She glanced between the prostrated toad and the smirking Daken and felt a wave of dizziness come over her. The title she had been thrown into was one of surprising power. As one of so many different daughters in the Nishiyori household, Ginrei had had little power. Nishiyori's own daughters came higher in the order of things than Ginrei had as Seiyo's child. She was not destined for land, for rule, perhaps not even for marriage. But Ginrei had been content with such a fate. To be trained, educated, to read, write, perform, and be with her female kin was enough of a life.

Now she was queen-like, with her own retainer? She stared unseeingly at the toad, overwhelmed and intrigued at once.

Cautiously she looked toward Daken. "Where is…?" her words died before she could utter his name. Most hated and most wanted at once. The one responsible for ruining her life—by providing Shimofuri and Sasugainu with troops—and saving it at once through marriage.

Daken knew what she was asking. His smirk grew more powerful still. "Lord Sesshomaru, my lady, is not far away. At my urging he has made a detour to acquire gifts for you." he looked over at Jaken and gave a barking laugh. "Sit up Jaken, Lady Ginrei is still very new to this."

The toad sat up, looking undignified and embarrassed. He fell into scrutinizing Ginrei fixedly, eyeing her up with his wide, yellow-orange eyes.

A woman, one of the older maids, slipped silently into the room and began setting down trays of tea. Ginrei watched the steam rising from hers and felt her mind withdrawing from the room around her, hiding away.

"Lord Sesshomaru will be here in about an hour, I would expect." Daken announced, and when she looked up at him, she found that he was staring at her now with compassion. She turned her face away, withdrawing again, uncertain and weak. The thought of her husband, the thin night robe wrapped around her body, his need for heirs and the usual, carnal male desire her female kin had always gossiped of, made her stomach twist. She twined her fingers around one another, wringing them until the tips turned white.

* * *

In truth, Sesshomaru had not hurried off to do as Daken had advised. He spent a great deal of time in hiding just outside the grounds of the secret lake palace. In the shadows of the forest there, Sesshomaru pondered his "wife's" fate. Plagued by nightmares, lonely, lost, and unhappy. She was unlikely even to conceive heirs under that kind of mental stress and emotional trauma. Rin's own miscarriages disrupted her fertility so that one loss left her grieving and weakened the next one's chances. Her losses were cumulative and though he adored her and wished to have pups—even if they were only miserable hanyous—he was beginning to dread them. When he joined with Rin physically there was always the chance of another pregnancy, another miscarriage. 

Both the inuyoukai bitch and Rin were alike in a shared past of violence. Rin had actually died. She owed him everything, and felt a growing loss because she could not bear him children. Sesshomaru expected no such thing from her, perhaps even preferred no pups with Rin, but such a wish was unfair to her.

Perhaps all of his females would be cursed for one reason or another, or even by his own doing, as was the case for Ginrei.

He debated the idea of going into the castle, excusing all of the servants, maids, Daken and Jaken, and then executing her. He would turn the palace into a place of prayer then, if he felt the inclination. Then he could return to Rin and start over. The next wife would be one he consulted with Rin over, involving her as if she were an equal. She would be able to pick the inuyoukai bitch he married, the female that would provide the royal heirs. Rin could even take them from the bitch and raise them as her own if she so desired.

It seemed like a smart idea for a time, but Sesshomaru's feet never moved from his spot overlooking the lake palace. Eventually, without truly giving the decision thought, Sesshomaru left for the nearest town and picked out a few gifts for his "wife."

* * *

A servant of Sesshomaru's castle, one of the human guards, walked into the woods at the end of his shift, much to the bafflement of the other men he served with. They looked between one another, perplexed, but then went about their business, preparing to return to wives and families, hungry at the end of their long shift guarding the inner palaces where Lady Rin and Lord Sesshomaru lived out their days in luxury. 

In the quiet of the woods, the single guard met with a heavily tattooed, mostly naked man. At first appearance he appeared to be a man, but much closer and it could be seen that his eyes were yellow, his ears sharply pointed, and the loincloth around his waist did not secure the bushy tail to his rear. He was a wolf demon, and he'd been hired to carry messages from this informant.

"Has Sesshomaru left the castle?"

"Yeah," the guard sniffled a little, wiped his snot across his sleeve in one motion. "Rumor has it he'll be gone for a while. Finishing some war business or some other crap like that. It was a lie I think. Going for blood is my guess." He hacked and spat off to one side.

The wolf youkai watched him with keen, sneaky yellow eyes. "Good." He grinned without emotion, exposing deadly canines as he did and extended out one hand. "For your trouble." There was a tiny cloth sack clutched between his clawed fingers. The guard took the money, pulling out a coin and testing it with his touch. (A/N: Actually I have no idea what currency they used in feudal Japan, rice? Coins? Pretend I know what I'm talking about, it was probably rice.)

"Before you go," the wolf youkai spoke in a low, throaty voice, "Take this too." Now he clasped a folded and sealed letter. If the guard had cared to look at it much, he would've noticed that the seal on it was from the Middle Lands, from Shimofuri specifically. "Make sure it gets to the hanyou girl living there—Tsukiyume."

The guard took the letter and tucked it into his clothes. He was preoccupied with the money, whether it was real or fake. His eyes were beginning to gleam as he realized the value of the sack in his palm.

"Thanks." He grunted and turned his back on the youkai. "Same time next week?"

"Yes." The wolf youkai replied. Then he bounded off, already half-wolf as he took his first step, and headed for the Middle Lands as fast as he could.

* * *

By the time Sesshomaru arrived, Ginrei was exhausted psychologically. The strangeness of the males that Sesshomaru had sent before him, the toad retainer and the old, grizzled inuyoukai Daken, were overwhelming her. The quiet gossip of women, the gentle voices, the crying babies, the laughter as they spoke of relatives and handsome lords fighting in distant battles. The toad and Daken were nothing like that. Their conversation was about politics, about past wars, battles, and many other things that interested her nothing now. 

They forgot that she was a victim in a most recent war. She was a survivor and a victim. As the toad and Daken spoke, she felt herself sinking deeper and deeper, running away. She imagined the faces of her family, of her cousins, her sisters, even her father, who had been a distant yet worshipped figure.

And then she felt Sesshomaru's presence sweep over her, a tingling sensation raced up and down her spine. She shivered and lowered her face. The maids' footsteps rushed here and there as they hurried to prepare more tea for the master of the palace, the guy that paid their salaries.

The bald little round-headed man, the egghead, came into the room and dropped to his knees, announcing the arrival of the esteemed Lord Sesshomaru of the Western Lands. As he fell into a bow, Sesshomaru swept into the room swiftly, his face cold and his eyes almost angry. Jaken gulped and at once prostrated himself. Daken followed suit but with more of a pause. Ginrei ducked only a little. Fear made her tremble, made it impossible for her to remove her eyes from him.

Sesshomaru sat nearest to her, though his body language was stiff and uncomfortable. The maids rushed around hi, placing another set of tea and dragging away what had been served to Ginrei, Jaken, and Daken before. As one of the maids took away Ginrei's untouched tea, Sesshomaru spoke, halfway clearing his throat. "You did not drink any of it."

Ginrei stared at his knees and remained in her awkward, partial bow. "No, Lord Sesshomaru." She answered, wincing at the quaking in her voice.

"You will drink this cup." He motioned with his single hand at the new teacup the maids had placed before her, still steaming. It was green-brown with a rich white foam. Then Sesshomaru lifted his voice slightly to one of the maids as she was walking away. "You will bring another cup for her."

The maid nodded and scurried away as if she'd been chastised.

Daken was faintly smirking at Sesshomaru, though when the younger lord looked his way he instantly averted his eyes and asked Ginrei, "How have you been, my lady? Well, I hope."

Ginrei lowered her eyes even more, trying to hide her face. She felt her lips twisting, trying to curl into some sort of disdainful sneer. How could he ask such a thing of her?

When she found that she couldn't answer, or didn't trust herself to do so without revealing her bitterness and pain, Jaken tapped the floor with his think staff, startling Ginrei into looking up at him. "You must answer when spoken to!" though Ginrei did not know it, Jaken was using the same tone he had on Rin when she was a child.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru said, quietly.

The toad cowered, apologizing immediately. "Yes, my lord? I'm so sorry, Lord Sesshomaru, I thought—forgive me?"

Sesshomaru said nothing, only shifted his position slightly, and threw a glare at Ginrei. "You will drink, wife."

Ginrei flinched and reached for the cup obediently, but her hands shook…

"Lord Seshomaru." Daken said sharply, "Perhaps you have a present for Lady Ginrei." He was giving the younger inuyoukai a meaningful stare.

Sesshomaru ignored him. "Do not spill that. Drink it." he was cold, without emotion at all. Yet in Ginrei's panic she imagined irritation, disgust, rage. Her hands quivered and shook. The tea spilled over the rim and onto the silky night robe she was wearing. She cried out, whimpering.

Now there was irritation in Sesshomaru's voice: "If you are going to be my wife you must be stronger than this. You are inuyoukai, you are stronger than this."

Ginrei tightened her grip on the cup and brought it to her lips. Every swallow was bitter, her face burned with embarrassment, her heart pounded inside her ears. When the cup was empty she set it clumsily back onto the tray and put her hands in her lap, right into the wetness of the spilled tea. It stung, still hot, as did her throat, but she tightened her jaw and stared blindly ahead.

Sesshomaru watched her for a time, and then looked to Jaken. "Jaken, I have brought you here to keep Ginrei company." He noticed that the silver-eyed bitch was looking his way and sneering slightly when he did not add a title to her name. As her husband he didn't have to perhaps, but considering how little they knew one another, it should have been done out of respect. The way he spoke it was familiar, as if they had been married properly, as if perhaps they shared emotion.

"Me?" Jaken croaked, shocked. "But, Lord—"

"You will stay with Lady Ginrei now and keep her company in this palace. You will also begin tutoring her any way that you know how."

The toad's eyes were bright and huge. "Y-yes Lord Sesshomaru!" he bowed quickly, formally accepting his duty and once more began to eye Ginrei.

Sesshomaru leaned slightly forward, looking around Ginrei to the egghead man still by the door. "You." he called, "Bring my wife her gifts."

The egghead bowed and scurried off. Silence took over the circle. Even Daken appeared mildly unhappy with the current situation and mood. Ginrei stared at her hands in her lap, at the greenish stain in her robe. At last the little man returned, awkwardly carrying a small chest with him. It was an elaborate thing, ornate and colored with lacquer and gold. The egghead set it between Ginrei and Sesshomaru. Ginrei made no move for it and showed no interest, but her posture had stiffened somewhat.

Sesshomaru opened the chest, the snaps creaked metallically, Jaken made a few quiet noises of eagerness, as if the presents inside were for him. Daken resumed his smirking. Only Ginrei remained unchanged, tense and nervous.

Out of the chest came a thick winter robe, white and pale gold. Tree branches in gold, snow in white and gray over the already white fabric. Sesshomaru laid it on the floor beside her.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken gushed, "It is the perfect thing for her!"

"Jaken." Sesshomaru grunted, "Shut up."

"Yes, my lord."

Sesshomaru pulled another gift from the chest; this one was a silvered mirror, bright, shiny. Painted flowers adorned the edges. He placed it on top of the robes gently, watching Ginrei with a casual, uncaring gaze.

Ginrei had never received gifts like this before, she stayed where she was, unmoving, afraid of doing something wrong that would bring down Sesshomaru's wrath. She both despised having to obey this strange inuyoukai who'd helped kill her family, and feared not pleasing him. Finally she bowed low and stayed there. "This lowly one thanks Lord Sesshomaru for his beautiful gifts."

Sesshomaru dipped his head so slightly it was hardly visible. "You are welcome."

At last the maids came and took Ginrei away. They clucked over her stained robe and sent her to bed. The gifts were taken as well, including the chest. Robes were piled inside it the lavish wedding robe, the winter robe, others that Ginrei had never worn. She wore a light thing to bed, burying herself in the covers and ignoring the maids when they tried to rouse her for dinner. She feared Sesshomaru storming into her room and forcing her out of bed to eat with all of them, but no one came.

Late in the night Ginrei came awake, startled, crying out. Someone's hands were around her throat, throttling the life out of her. She fought the grasp, pawed at her attacker's face. But when a light flashed on she saw that it was Kanbi—no it was her sister, a cousin, Ransou, her father Seiyo, and Nishiyori…

She sprang up in her bed, shouting incoherently and froze, stunned all over again as she saw a shadow looming in the doorway to her room. It was an inuyoukai, tall and proud with a ruler's bearing. She knew at once that this was her husband, Sesshomaru.

She opened her mouth, trying to speak, and then shut it again. Her breathing was loud and fast in the darkness.

"You are afraid." He spoke with a deep but very quiet voice. Ginrei wanted to see his face, to read it, his voice was a lost cause and would tell her nothing. "What did you dream of?"

She felt shameful tears springing to her eyes. She cursed her treasonous body, making her out to be such a weakling before this powerful lord who just so happened to be her husband and to hold her fate in the palm of his single hand. Her throat burned, it closed up on her when she tried to speak.

"Don't cry." He ordered, sternly.

Choking slightly, she tried to hide herself back in the sheets of her futon, praying he would lose interest in her and leave.

There was a long pause, throughout which Ginrei struggled to calm herself, but as the silence went on she felt sanity slipping from her, finger by finger, right out of her grasp. At last, Sesshomaru spoke, "Tell me what I must do." After about a second pause he threw in her name, sounding both stiff and soft at once. "Ginrei."

"What?" her voice croaked. She wanted to see his face but knew that even if she lifted away the covers he would be shadowed by the hallway light behind him and the darkness of her own room.

"You are unhappy."

Why did he care? Why did he bother? Of course she was unhappy! Her entire family was dead; she was married to a lord that had stolen her from them! Every day she lived was a disgrace to Nishiyori and Seiyo…

"I will not have you trying to take your own life. You must be strong. You are my wife."

She cringed beneath the sheets, though his tone was only stern, holding no threat for the most part.

"Jaken will educate you." he seemed to lose steam now, uncertain, searching for her to speak and assure him that things would be better with the addition of the little toad into her life. When she did not answer him, Sesshomaru moved, Ginrei could hear the rustle of his robes. He moved closer to her futon. She stiffened at first and then found that her breaths shook with fear. She felt helpless, and suddenly she was reliving the night of her family's death. The snow, the darkness of the gardens that had once been so beautiful but had become places where an army of monsters lurked. The inuyoukai, cold and remote and powerful, with their long, curved blades ready to strike…

Before Sesshomaru drew any closer to made a small terrified sound, her shaking intensified. She closed her eyes against the tears, but with his keen nose Sesshomaru could easily still scent them.

He was making no progress with her at all. In desperation he remembered Daken's words, of who this female was before she'd been brought to him; one of many daughters, wives, sisters. She was from a nest of women. Males frightened her, males had brought her nothing but violence recently…

Desperation made him speak: "There is a hanyou in my care. Would it please you if I sent her to entertain you?"

Ginrei hardly heard his words; she was too busy struggling with her own fear, her flashback and its ensuing panic. Sesshomaru had half ceased to exist.

Sesshomaru paused for a moment, still sensing her fear and pain. She was as good as unable to answer him. Uncomfortable in his position with this creature that was supposed to be his wife, Sesshomaru turned to leave. He did not belong with her, couldn't handle her suffering…

But he didn't walk away; he hesitated, and then at last moved back toward her, slowly. With a gentle touch, he reached out to the lump of covers, simply laying a hand on her, hoping that perhaps it would stir her out of whatever waking nightmare she had entered.

Women were often weak, sheltered things. Though Ginrei was an inuyoukai, wellborn and pure blooded, she was sheltered. Violence was a new thing; she was like a crushed flower. Sesshomaru was callous; violence had long since ceased to bother him. Yet, as a very young pup, he had shied from violence as well. Rin, in her own way, had been much the same. As a child she must've been like Ginrei, struck mute by the death of her family, but after his rescue and resurrection of her, Rin had hardened, making herself more into a man than a weak court woman. It was that strength that often fascinated Sesshomaru. He could respect her above all others.

But Ginrei appealed more to a paternal, protective side of him. She was the mute Rin, struggling to survive on her own. But unlike Rin, who identified humans and human war as the evils in her life, Ginrei saw her evils as Sesshomaru and the male inuyoukai wars. She was married to the cause of her misery…

She was a wounded, offended bitch. Old dogs cannot be taught new tricks, but perhaps a young one could be broken in with a new master.

"No harm will come to you here, Ginrei." He let his voice roll slowly, lazily off his tongue, and he used a deeper tone that a father might use. It was a tone he had used when speaking to Rin as a child and sometimes while training her. "I will not allow it, but you must answer me. What must I do? The hanyou girl in my service, would you like her to stay with you?"

Ginrei's shaking quieted somewhat, though Sesshomaru could still hear her breath whistling rapidly. Sesshomaru moved away from her, allowing a scowl to cross his face in the darkness. "In the morning I will ask you again."

He vanished from her room, little more than a wraith or a dream. Only the faint creak of floorboards gave him away as he moved down the hall and into one of the other bedrooms. Ginrei was left to shake and fight her demons alone once more.

* * *

"Lady Tsukiyume." A man's voice called from outside the screen door. The hanyou girl looked up, orange eyes bright and alert. She didn't answer the call; instead she looked toward her tutor, a crotchety old man in a dove gray robe. 

The tutor, called Kuenai, scowled irritably. Without turning to look at the intruder, he snarled, "She is in the middle of a calligraphy lesson, you fool."

"There's a letter for her."

Tsukiyume's ears pricked up now, attentive and alert. "A letter?" her voice squeaked slightly with surprise. Her hands, delicate although clawed, were poised over some rice paper that was flecked with gold. A few black droplets of ink dribbled onto the paper and she gasped, pulling her hand away from it.

Kuenai choked and snatched the rice paper away. "You stupid, stupid girl!" he cursed vehemently and stared with a critical eye at the inkblots on the paper. "Lord Sesshomaru is a strange sort of fool to be wasting his resources—and _my_ time—on _you."_

Tsukiyume frowned, but her ears folded back helplessly, showing a mixed response to his berating. Kuenai was a youkai, a long lived and well-established teacher. It was true; he was probably more talented at teaching than Tsuki ever would be as a student. His effort and talent was mostly wasted on her. But Tsukiyume worked hard, practicing even outside of her classes, trying always to impress her teachers, and through them Sesshomaru as well.

But right now she was more interested in the letter waiting for her than Kuenai's insults.

"Please sensei," she bowed, awkwardly moving her wrist to avoid dotting the table now with black ink. "May I receive the letter?"

Kuenai sneered at her. "It's a wonder you can read at all, girl."

"Please sensei." She repeated, ducking her head lower to hide her irritation.

"Fine—but then it's back to your lesson."

"Thank you!" she placed the brush back in the inkwell and pushed herself up hurriedly from the floor, rushing to the screen door. She slid it open and saw on the other side a human man with a snotty nose. It was a guard, still wearing his rich decorative armor with Sesshomaru's crest of the Western Lands. In one hand he held the letter, still sealed. Tsukiyume snatched it from him quickly and bowed, murmuring thanks. Before the man had walked away she had already torn it open, recognizing the seal as her brother's and mother's.

At once she saw the symbols and saw Shimofuri's delicate handwriting, much like her own. His words were warm, pretty, and familiar.

_Tsukiyume,_

_I pray this finds you well. I have received your letters, sister. Sesshomaru has trained you well indeed. Your hand has improved, as has your language. He is also training you to fight, as I understand it. You are pleased with your lessons, you enjoy Lady Rin's company, but I must ask you: Do you wish to come home? Sesshomaru has no intentions of releasing you. I want you to know I have asked him to free you on many occasions. It is frightening Tsukiyume, but you must know, when I receive your letters the seal on them has been broken. Someone is reading your letters. That is why I have not used Sesshomaru's messengers, I do not trust them. I wish to speak to you freely, but he will not allow it. _

_The war in the Isei is finished. Sasugainu and I no longer require his help, yet he continues to hold you as a hostage. He is a ruthless leader, Sister. You must watch over yourself, Sesshomaru has grown too powerful. Soon he will have heirs to replace him, he is more ambitious than I could have imagined. I fear for you Sister. Be careful. I am doing all within my power to get you safely home. _

_Tsukiyume, there is—_

Kuenai grunted nearby, making Tsukiyume jump and dunk out of his grasp just in time. The old youkai sneered at her. "That's a long letter. Who is it from?"

There was a glint in his eye that Tsukiyume didn't like. She clutched the letter to herself fiercely, as if it were her brother himself. "It's for me, sensei."

"That's not what I asked." Kuenai snarled. He was moving a little closer again, shuffling on his old feet.

Tsukiyume pulled at the neckline of her outer robe and shoved the letter hurriedly inside. "Sensei, it is time for my lessons to resume." She tried to smile innocently, but Kuenai had not finished with his suspicion.

"You will hand the letter over to me."

"It is mine." She protested, but though her voice was strong inwardly she felt feeble. How could she stop him really?

"You are in Lord Sesshomaru's house. I am your teacher, you are to respect me and always obey me or I will report your bad behavior to Lord Sesshomaru. Now, hand over the letter. I will read it and then give it back to you." Kuenai thrust out one wrinkled, clawed hand and waited, expectantly.

Tsukiyume shook her head. Quiet but firmly, she said, "No."

Kuenai's face became dangerously still. There was a moment when Tsuki was unsure what was going to happen, and then Kuenai lunged for her. Screeching, Tsuki leapt just in time, evading his grasp. She crossed the small lesson room in one bound, clumsily knocking over the table and all of its ink and rich rice paper too. Kuenai howled with rage.

"You little hanyou bitch! You stupid, foolish girl!" he gestured madly at the table, the dribbling ink, the smeared and ruined papers…and then he ran howling at her again.

Tsukiyume yelped and ran away at once, driven by instinct she barely knew she possessed. Throwing the sliding door aside, knocking it off its hinges with her surprising burst of strength, Tsukyume charged into the hall. Maids cried out with shock, throwing themselves out of the way as Tsukiyume rushed past them with Kuenai just behind her. The full blooded youkai sensei was faster than Tsukiyume likely was, but not within the confined of the castle. As they twisted through the screened hallways, Tsukiyume's smaller frame was able to manage the corners better. Kuenai slashed and smashed through a few walls, cursing the whole way.

Tsukiyume at last rounded one corner and found herself in the royal hall, the place where two enormous bedrooms sat across from one another, Sesshomaru and Rin's quarters. It was early morning. Rin often liked to stay inside her room then and read texts that had reached the palace from the mainland, or things from the monks, and other little treasures of the learned. Tsukiyume knocked the sliding door away and rushed into Rin's room, panting.

"Lady Rin! Rin!"

Rin was indeed at her small writing desk, laboring over some parchment, squinting down at it. When Tsuki burst into her room she gasped, startled. "Tsuki—what—"

And then Kuenai burst into the room, snarling, claws bared and ready to deal damage.

"What is going on here?" Rin demanded, pulling at her robe to try and hide herself from Kuenai. "Has everyone gone mad now that Lord Sesshomaru is away?"

Kuenai calmed himself somewhat, seemingly enough to regain the power of restraint and speech. "The hanyou bitch received a letter and refuses to allow me to read it." he sneered at Tsukiyume and snarled, "Treasonous bitch!"

"It's my letter." Tsuki swallowed thickly and let her eyes land pleadingly on Rin. She prayed that Rin would adhere to privacy and allow her to keep the letter without question.

"Who is it from?" Rin asked, appearing confused, cautious.

Tsukiyume felt her hopes dashed. If Rin were to read the letter she would probably be unhappy with it. Shimofuri had had the letter delivered in secret; he had spoken of Sesshomaru without respect, offering him no proper title. He had given Rin the proper title, but it was clear that there was resentment between Shimofuri and Sesshomaru. Could Rin honestly be expected to take sides against her mate?

She decided there was no way out but to tell the truth. "My brother."

Rin's features brightened. "Ah." She turned to Kuenai and said, "You may leave, I have the situation under control. Thank you, sensei, for your concern. You are a loyal servant to our family."

Kuenai, at one time, had also been Rin's calligraphy teacher. With Rin he had been starting from scratch. She was human and born a peasant. He had expected nothing from her in the way of intelligence, but she had surprised him many times over by being exceptionally bright, comparable perhaps even to Sesshomaru when Kuenai had tutored him. As a result of this, Kuenai had a surprising, begrudging respect for Rin. Now he was hardly able to disobey her order though it was clear he disagreed. Rin had grown from being a student to the lady of the household. She was his boss now.

Kuenai bowed and, with one last glare to Tsukiyume, he departed out the broken slide door. Maids skittered out of his way, watching him warily and then fluttering around the broken screen door, trying to fix it to give Lady Rin the privacy she deserved as the mistress of the house.

Rin turned back to Tsukiyume and sighed, smiling slightly. "He's a bit of a hothead. He nearly did the same thing to me as a child once, Tsuki. His shouting brought Sesshomaru, and after that single instance Lord Sesshomaru sat in on every one of my lessons to protect me." She smiled warmly, her eyes glazing over with the sweetness of memory. Sesshomaru was both father figure and lover, in a strange, all-encompassing relationship. Tsukiyume often did not understand it, but she understood a protective male figure, the bond between. Hers was in the Middle Lands; his letter was still against her skin, tempting her to read the rest of it.

"I'm sorry for all of the commotion." Tsukiyume bowed a little, feeling her cheeks burning, "I thought he was going to kill me."

Rin smirked and waved a hand through the air as if to dismiss an invisible Kuenai. "That old guy is all huff and bluff. He was a warrior in the days of Inutaisho, but he's been old for a long time. Sesshomaru once beat him when Kuenai bullied him in class, and forever afterwards he's known he was old because his own students could best him. But now he's had his honor insulted. Sesshomaru has forced him to educate human and hanyou girls."

Tsukiyume tried to smile but she felt tense, caught between Kuenai, her brother, Sesshomaru, and Rin. Where did her loyalties lie anyway?

Rin noted her discomfort and sighed, stretching a little before she spoke. "So, what did young shishi-sama have to say?"

"I, uh, haven't finished reading it yet."

Rin nodded, "Ah, well, feel free to do so, it's time for my bath anyway." The maids swept in, on cue, and began hustling about, picking up clothing and shepherding Rin out of the room.

Before Rin left, Tsuki decided there was one thing she could reveal to Rin that was fair. "Lady Rin?"

"Yes?" Rin hesitated just at the broken screen door. The maids spilled in and out around her.

"Shishi-sama says that the letter I write to him come with broken seals. Someone is reading what I write to him."

Rin stared at her for a moment, blankly, then her face twisted into a frown. "I'll have to speak to Lord Sesshomaru about that."

Tsukiyume bowed from the waist up. "Thank you very much Lady Rin, thank you."

When Rin was gone, Tsukiyume pulled out the letter again, feeling it slowly at first, trying to imagine what was going through her brother's mind as he wrote it, what was he thinking? At last, with a deep breath, she let her eyes focus on the writing again, on the last two paragraphs.

_Tsukiyume, there is one last thing I must tell you. Has Sesshomaru told Lady Rin of his true reasons behind taking the Isei province? Do you know of his wife? I must tell you this if you do not already know it. Knowledge is power, knowing Sesshomaru's secret gives you power over him. If it was not already known to you, I would advise you to keep your counsel, Sister. Do not tell Rin that I have told you, and certainly not Sesshomaru. Keep it secret for now. _

_You may write to me through my own secret messengers. The guard that delivered this letter to you will carry your letters to my messenger. It will be every evening of the fourth day of the week, at the change in the guard. You must seek him out if you can and he will carry your letters to me so they will be safe and secret. Continue to write letters to me through Sesshomaru's messengers, but do it knowing they will be read and known. It would be wise of you to burn my letters as they come. _

_Blessings and good fortune to you Sister,_

_Shimofuri_

Tsukiyume's hands were shaking as she set the letter down onto Rin's desk. Her thoughts were spinning wildly. A wife? Whose wife? Not Sesshomaru's certainly. A marriage would have been huge. The ceremony involved, the vows, the sake. And Rin would have to know.

_Secret._

She reached again for Shimofuri's letter and reread it, searching for other small things that might give her hints. _Soon he will have heirs to replace him, he is more ambitious than I could have imagined. Has Sesshomaru told Lady Rin of his true reasons behind taking the Isei province? Do you know of his wife?_

The war in the Isei was to get Sesshomaru a wife?

There was a flurry of activity in the hall. Panic took over Tsukiyume. She hurried to the corner of Rin's room where a brazier was burning, providing both light and heat, and she shoved the letter into the flames. The rice paper lit the fire differently, casting wild colors like a tiny burst of fireworks. Tsukiyume shuddered as she watched it burning.

_What kind of political game has this all turned into…?_ When Rin reentered the room, Tsukiyume felt a twinge of fear and sympathy for the human girl. _How could it be true?_

* * *

_woooo yes, an update, and it's even LONG for you too...write me reviews, I love them and I love you all and yeah, I am a review whore. _


	6. Sabotage

A/N: okay, out of curiosity, NOT because it would change any outcome at all because in the end Rin will remain I assure you…But I was interested in having a little poll. Those of you who get to this, write in to me and tell me how you feel about Ginrei. I enjoy reader feedback a lot on new characters because I have at times, meant a character to be neutral or even good but for some reason readers instantly hate them or distrust them. Maybe I'm just a villainess so my characters end up making ppl hate them, I don't know.

But at any rate, I know I like writing Ginrei, she has potential to shake things up really badly or to remain a character that's not threatening at all. She will serve her wifely purpose, that is my plan so far, but the audience's attachment or hatred of her will partially influence how I develop her. I'm open to many variations, including one where Rin is a little psycho (like seeking revenge) after finding out. Of course I know that variation is likely not a popular one.

In the last book of the _Tales of the Otori_ series by Lian Hearn, there is a woman who does basically this. When she finds out her husband's greatest secret (that he had a son with another woman years and years ago) she becomes so enraged she leaves with his enemies and burns down their castle and refuses to see him, speak with him, nothing. Only after he dies does she repent, and basically without her he refuses to live, he kills himself. A terrible ending. I would never do that to you guys, but I have been considering something along the lines of the powerful female figure seeking revenge and/or justice for the man's wrongdoing. When I first introduced Rin in _So Much for the Hanyou's Happy Ending_ she was a character of great power. I feel like she's lost that with her miscarriages, her failure to become a mother. The vindictive move (as well as the running away, for which the story is named) is a way for me to reestablish Rin's power as a character…

I dunno, the English major in me is going whacko happy nuts here. Tell me what you think of Ginrei, I am always eager to listen…

Disclaimer: Nope don't own them

* * *

**Sabotage**

Sesshomaru waited on the small balcony overlooking the scummy little lake, early the next morning. With his family's trademark golden eyes, he watched the sun peek over the horizon in a burst of fiery reds, yellows, oranges, and gold. The lake absorbed them all and drowned them out to gray at first. But soon the light of the sunrise was too intense. The colors appeared on the still surface of the lake, but the reflection it afforded was imperfect. Where reeds and scum protruded, breaking the glassy, mirror-like surface, the image of the sunrise was disturbed. Little ripples danced over the surface.

Most of the vegetation was dead anyway. Winter's cold, icy fist was coming over the land. Snow cover was splotchy, but it was certainly coming. When Sesshomaru lifted his nose to the wind he could almost smell it spilling over that colorful horizon, coming to blot out the gray drab of dead foliage with the brilliant, smothering white of winter.

It was disquieting, even disturbing.

A maid appeared, cautiously. She laid down a tray of tea for him, steaming in the chilly early morning light. Sesshomaru caught her hand before she left him. "Bring my wife to sit with me." He ordered, "Make certain there are plenty of blankets for her."

The maid nodded and disappeared into the palace, sliding the door shut behind her to keep in the scant heat of the bedrooms inside. Sesshomaru listened with his keen ears, straining for the sounds of the household, for sounds of his "wife" getting ready. He heard moans, at first, then the cajoling of the maids as they coaxed her out of bed. The bath took a long time, with the maids bickering and bantering over her as if she were a child and not their mistress. Finally she was dressed and paraded out to him.

The maids had dressed her in the winter robe he'd given her as a gift the night before. It was a perfect choice for her. Ginrei was fair, even more so than Sesshomaru. Her hair had a darker hint to it, one more genuinely like silver, whereas Inutaisho's line had hair that was of a bleached color, seemingly without pigment at all. Ginrei's really was silver. (I've always thought Sesshomaru and Inuyasha had white hair. Apparently after some breed of Japanese dog? Imagine Ginrei's is slightly darker.) With her hair that color it matched the snowflakes embroidered to the robe. She was an ice queen, a goddess of winter.

The maids sat Ginrei down near him and then helped her shroud herself in blankets, rich white and gray animal pelts. Ginrei feebly hung onto these, staring at her delicate, clawed fingers and hands more than anything else. She avoided making eye contact with Sesshomaru, or even so much as looking his way.

When the maids had placed tea out before Ginrei as well, they at last parted, leaving the newly married couple alone together. Silence reigned immediately. Ginrei appeared to be staring at the scenery, but from her scent and stiff posture Sesshomaru knew she was not concerned about the sunrise, the scummy lake, or the possibility of the coming snow.

After a few minutes of silence had passed, Sesshomaru finally broke down and spoke. "Ginrei."

Her fingers twitched on the pelts, her shoulders moved as she took a breath. "Lord Sesshomaru?"

"The hanyou girl in my service, do you desire her company? Jaken will still tutor you of course." He kept his voice calm and flat, trying to expect nothing from her to avoid scaring her off.

She shifted in her blankets, her eyes seemed heavy, she kept them mostly closed. Her skin was pale, her hair pinned carefully by the maids to the top of her head. Silence was the only answer to Sesshomaru's question for a long time, but then at last Ginrei spoke quietly, openly frowning in confusion. "Hanyou?"

Sesshomaru searched her face, seeing the frown. Had this girl been so closeted away that she had never heard the term before? He repeated it slowly for her, trying to be always patient, like a father, like family. "Hanyou. Taikokajin Tsukiyume." He gave Tsukiyume's mother's name rather than her father's name because Taikokajin had been the notable parent in this rare instance.

(A/N: FYI those of you unfamiliar with this family. Taikokajin was a female ruler, the only one, from the Middle Lands. She went nuts after a monster abducted Tsukiyume in _With Our Arms Wide Open._ She held Kagome captive, tried to take Inuyasha and Kagome's son from them. Kagome essentially killed her. Shimofuri, Tsukiyume's older half brother, was her heir and thus now the ruler of the Middle Lands. Taikokajin murdered all of her lovers, both Shimofuri's youkai father and Tsuki's mortal monk father. So Sesshy doesn't know or care about Tsuki's human heritage, he tells only the demon side.)

Ginrei turned now, for the first time, and looked at him with shock. "Lady Taikokajin?"

Sesshomaru took in the inuyoukai girl's expression, the widened silvered eyes, the startled expression in the "O" shape of her mouth, but mixed with it was the lowering of her eyebrows, the change in her posture. He decided to be frank with her, to educate her.

"Taikokajin was a fool. She lost her mind. She should have allowed her son to replace her many years ago and retired peacefully. She allowed her emotions to control her." he paused taking in the slow tightening of Ginrei's jaw, the loss of the innocent, surprised "O" shape of her lips.

"You do not like what I am saying." Sesshomaru observed aloud, uncaringly.

Ginrei lowered her eyes and did not respond.

"You may disagree. You are my wife, not a statue. Speak." This was the close to the first time he'd seen her show some sort of response, some sort of emotion aside from anger at him for her situation, or an all-encompassing shock because of the trauma she'd suffered. He wanted to encourage it. "Speak your mind, Ginrei."

"She was strong," Ginrei whispered faintly, "She fought."

Sesshomaru tipped his head slightly, the only sign that he had heard her at all, but for him it was a major change in expression, full of meaning. He was intrigued. "She was a coward. She manipulated others to achieve her goals in the end. It was her undoing. She made too many enemies. She was a fool."

Ginrei huddled more into herself, into the blankets, and squinted against the growing sunlight. "She was a woman."

Sesshomaru's golden gaze narrowed slightly. "You admire her because of that."

Ginrei didn't answer this time. Her eyes closed and she pulled a little at the blankets around her. When she stilled she did not speak. A breeze picked up, rushing over the palace, tapping on the shutters and sliding fusuma doors. Sesshomaru smelled the staleness of the lake beneath them. He restrained a sneer at the stink and considered getting koi fish for the lake. Perhaps that would equalize the scent, though he doubted it. Chances were it would only make the lake a little less dreary to look at.

"Do you wish me to send Taikokajin Tsukiyume to stay with you?" he asked again.

Ginrei pursed her lips, appearing, for the first time, to think his question over. Yet, instead of answering him simply yes or no, she asked a question of her own: "Why did the war happen?"

Sesshomaru eyed her carefully for a moment, taking in her well formed, proud profile. Then he turned his face away. His jaw muscles flexed and tightened, the only sign of his distress at all. Answering her question would be difficult, yet it needed to be done. She was coming out with something now, exposing something, trusting him with it. She was relaxing a little, ceasing to see him as her enemy.

"I do not know. Taikokajin grew complacent. Nishiyori desired power and he sensed weakness. He planned for years and then made his move." It was as honest as he could be. It was impossible for him to tell her the truth in its entirety, that Taikokajin was powerless to resist Nishiyori's onslaught at the end of her reign, that Shimofuri was no better off, that it had only been Sesshomaru's own intervention, money, information, and troops that had won the war. So, in a roundabout way Ginrei's family had died because of Sesshomaru…

Ginrei shifted in her blankets, twisting slightly away from Sesshomaru so that her face was farther out of the direct morning sunlight. "Yes, I'll meet her."

For a moment Sesshomaru was left confused, he struggled to hide his reaction, to keep it from his face though Ginrei was not looking at him. Finally it dawned on him that she was talking about Tsukiyume. He nodded, "Then on my next visit I will bring her to you. In the meantime you will have Jaken to educate you."

Ginrei answered blandly, with a quiet voice, "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru."

There was still something odd in her that Sesshomaru wasn't sure he liked. It made him nervous, suspicious. Did she suspect his involvement? Was she truly as sheltered and naive as he'd believed her to be? If she was smarter than she appeared, clever and scheming, could he still manage to control her, tame her, and have her produce his heirs? If she was intelligent and clever, those were good traits to have passed onto his offspring, but potentially bad for his political career. Throwing her in with Tsukiyume suddenly felt like a grave mistake—except that Tsukiyume was the _sister_ of the young lord that had waged a war and won against Ginrei's uncle Nishiyori.

Bonding with her, making her into an ally as well as a wife, perhaps through education and continued gentleness and patience, would be the only way to assure she was not a threat. Yet he didn't want to do that. She was a vessel, a creature with one purpose: to produce his pure blooded royal heirs. Urgency tainted his thoughts for a moment, tightening up his muscles, making his body stiffen with irritation, nervousness, discomfort. The longer she held out, damaged and distant, the longer he deceived Rin…

He blinked and rose to his feet swiftly, turning his back on Ginrei and facing the sliding door so that she wouldn't see his thick scowl. "I am leaving for the day. I will return to you tomorrow with Tsukiyume." The sooner he had Tsukiyume away from Rin the better. Tsukiyume was too close to Shimofuri, and Sesshomaru didn't trust the younger lord to keep his secret very long. Sooner or later it would reach Tsukiyume, and then through her Rin. Sesshomaru feared that loss of control, feared it wildly.

"Your lessons with Jaken will begin this afternoon." He told her this over his shoulder and then slid the screen door open and stepped through, vanishing into the darkness of the palace.

* * *

It was early evening when Sesshomaru returned to his castle in the Western Lands. He spent some time meeting with advisers and hearing the latest news and figures on money, crops, people. The latest skirmishes, the slow return of his troops back into the Western Lands again from fighting in the Isei province. It was quick work, dealt with fast and relatively painlessly. When this was done Sesshomaru retreated back to his personal chambers, changing out of his more formal and showy traveling robes and into more casual ones. This was a difficult task because he didn't wait for his attendants to catch up to him to help. He despised their help but usually took it because it saved time. With only one arm dressing oneself could prove to be bothersome.

He left his own chambers and passed into Rin's immediately. Word would have reached her by now that he was home. He expected her to be inside her room, reading or writing or drawing, as she usually did to practice calligraphy. If she didn't practice it was entirely likely that she would forget her characters and calligraphy. It was important to Rin that she maintained herself, partially this was because she knew Sesshomaru respected these arts and her education, but it was also because she took genuine interest in the activities. They busied her when Tsukiyume was in classes, when Jaken was busy, and when Sesshomaru was away.

Her room, however, was empty. The brazier was down to nothing but coals. The room was beginning to take on a chill. Rin had not been in this room for some time. He tried to keep the irritation from leaping to the fore of his mind but could not. Now he knew when he found Rin she would at once see his expression—though it was only within his eyes that he couldn't control the display—and she would wonder what was wrong.

The answer to that question: a lot. Currently, however, number one on his list was the physical desire to be close to Rin. Relieving frustration that had built up around the distraught, distant Ginrei made him turn on his heel and head out of her room to search for her elsewhere. In the early evenings Tsukiyume was finishing her lessons, about ready to go to her physical trainer to receive fighting lessons. Sesshomaru decided to check in the courtyard.

They weren't there. The courtyard was where training with fighting poles took place. Rin had enjoyed that type of combat; she was skilled at it—and a frequent cheat. It was a habit she developed when sparring in her adolescence with Sesshomaru himself. It was the only way she could control his speed. By jabbing him with the pole she affected a little barrier, a thing to stop him from running super speed circles around her.

Next he tried the sparring hall, an indoors area with matting, made for one on one combat with no weapons. Rin had never liked that as much, though Sesshomaru had insisted she be taught it until she could perform the various movements with her eyes closed. One could never count on having a weapon readily available.

At last, success. Rin and Tsukiyume were here, fighting one another hand to hand in loose, unflattering robes. Both women had pinned their hair back, both moved with great speed and grace, Rin more so than the hanyou girl amazingly. Tsukiyume was still young and clumsy, and hanyou were not known for their grace. Inuyasha was evidence enough of that. The floor bounced under the girls as they leapt past one another, kicking and punching, thrusting and parrying. Tsukiyume had speed on her side as a hanyou, as well as brute strength, but Rin was the more experienced of the two. Her deftness showed itself clearly.

They noticed Sesshomaru's presence the moment he slipped into the hall, despite his silent, bare feet. Tsukiyume was the first to respond, dropping onto her knees and bowing. Her ears were lying flat on her skull, tight and unmoving. It was a position that Sesshomaru noticed acutely because it was a mark of discomfort or intimidation. He knew this because it was this same ear position that Inuyasha almost always adopted when he first caught sight of his older brother. Tsukiyume had never adopted it right away before. She might id she were uncomfortable in conversation later but not upon immediately seeing him…

Rin was normal, much to his relief. She dropped into a slower, more graceful bow. "Sesshomaru-sama." She purred. Her scent came with her movement, and Sesshomaru picked it up from all around the sparring hall in her sweat. She was, yet again, fertile. Inwardly he was both aroused and repulsed. Sleeping with her now, no matter how badly he wanted to, would only serve to hurt her with more miscarriages.

He swallowed the realization and buried it deep inside. "Rin, Tsukiyume. I must speak with you both."

When they looked up at him they bore entirely different expressions. Rin's was an innocent, questioning gaze. Tsukiyume's was a wide mouthed, wide eyed gape. Rin answered for them. "Of course Sesshomaru-sama."

Despite the unsettling things he'd noticed about Tsukiyume, Sesshomaru focused on Rin. "Rin, come with me."

She got to her feet and moved to follow him at once. As Sesshomaru turned away, he saw Tsukiyume peeking up at him from the floor, orange eyes still wide and fearful, watching him as if he were a predator, some sort of snake about to strike. He felt minor irritation with her, but pressed on, changing position so that he could walk at Rin's side with his single arm pressed against her.

"Rin is pleased to see Sesshomaru-sama again." Rin said, quietly as they walked through the halls. Gold screen doors lined the walls on either side. Silver ink had been used to paint trees, leaves, water, and birds. A few flowers decorated the screens as well, waterfalls of them spilling over a few screens and then vanishing on the next set. Unlike the other images they were painted in a deep, purple black, like a thick, severe bruise. That color was modeled more after Inutaisho's tastes. Intaisho's cheeks had had the slashes of that color, a trait that Inuyasha had inherited, but not Sesshomaru.

The silver ink was Sesshomaru's own additions, made in his youth right after Inutaisho had died. It was the same color as Ginrei's eyes.

Sesshomaru pointed his narrowed, troubled golden eyes straight ahead, barely hearing Rin through his own abrupt attack of guilt.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" Rin touched his hand with hers gently as they walked, concerned because he had not answered her or so much as looked at her. "Is something the matter?"

Her scent knocked the guilt away, powerful and thick and arousing. Sesshomaru blinked once, the only sign he gave of having recovered. "No, Rin." He folded his clawed hand around her tiny, slender, human one, and continued walking for a time in silence. At last he drew a short breath—silently—and announced, "I have decided that Tsukiyume will be sent home to her brother."

Rin's body stiffened at his side but she didn't falter. "That would indeed please her, Lord Sesshomaru." Rin's voice had changed in a tiny way that revealed her displeasure, and Sesshomaru took note of it at once.

"You are unhappy with my decision."

"Rin has grown fond of Tsukiyume. She will miss her, very much."

Sesshomaru resisted the desire to flinch. He'd known as much, it didn't surprise him, but guilt and worry clamored strongly at the edges of his mind. He already had second thoughts. He struggled to weigh the options in his mind, even as he felt Rin staring at him from his side, trying to read him.

The silence went on too long, Rin could not contain herself. "Did Sesshomaru-sama come to this decision because of sensei Kuenai?"

Sesshomaru was startled by her question, but caught onto the significance of it at once and stifled his reaction. "Yes." If he pretended to know about whatever this was already, Rin was likely to accidentally reveal more to him. And even if she didn't, Sesshomaru was known for his silence. She would not doubt him just because he refused to discuss it with her.

"If Rin may be so bold, Sesshomaru-sama," they stopped before a flight of stairs, maids skittered to and fro, giving their lord and his lady brief glances of surprise as they passed. "Sensei Kuenai is a violent, intolerable old dog."

Sesshomaru decided to play with her. "The same may be said of me."

Rin blinked and blanched, turning away. "Sesshomaru-sama…" she knew he wasn't taking her seriously and she was frustrated, which worked to his advantage. She would reveal more to him as she struggled to get him to listen to her argument. "I will ask Tsukiyume to allow me to read the letter Lord Shimofuri sent her. I am her friend, she'll trust me." She turned back to him, eyeing him with open irritation. "Shimofuri is your ally. You can trust him I'm sure—why are you having the letter Tsukiyume sends to him opened and read?"

Sesshomaru fought the desire to scowl at her. This was horrible, terrible news. Something strengthened within him, turning hard, cold, and callous. "One can never assume one is safe in one's position. Shimofuri is young and high from his victory in the Isei. To trust is to be blind." As he stared at Rin, he realized, with a jolt, what he'd said. He was staring at the woman he loved, had saved many, many times. And yet…_she should not have trusted me._

He turned away from her and began to go up the stairs. After a pause, Rin followed, her footsteps heavy with emotion. Each impact felt like a slap to Sesshomaru. He struggled not to wince. When he had reached the top he moved down the hall, still seemingly ignoring Rin behind him. The young woman moved almost as silently as he did as she tried to catch up. In a moment she was right behind him, fuming silently.

"Sesshomaru-sama, Rin wishes you would reconsider the decision to send Tsukiyume back to Lord Shimofuri."

"He is her kin." He answered blandly, "It will build a connection between myself and Shimofuri…_trust."_ The word hurt him to say, but it needed to be spoken, it could not be avoided.

Rin's breathing had changed behind him, elevated, rougher. She was angry and her footsteps had grown heavier again, sign that she was caught by emotion rather than thinking of her training as a proper lady of the court.

Sesshomaru reached his chambers and paused before the screen door, aware of Rin waiting just behind him. If she entered his room they were liable to fight, to argue, and then, as a sort of resolution of their tension, they would join physically. He rather liked the thought of sleeping with her, but that usually lead to another pregnancy, another miscarriage, and months of grief or tension in between. Every baby threw Rin into a frezy of worry and excitement, and ever loss sent her spiraling downward. Whenever she recovered she became fertile again, and with great speed she fell pregnant again.

It was a cycle he was growing weary of because it only caused Rin pain, only made them both unhappy.

The frustration came again, coupled with many other, unnamable emotions with this thought: why was it that Rin was perfectly healthy, perfectly fertile, and perfectly able to conceive over and over again, but could not care a child beyond a few months? Was his seed to blame? Was her grief simply causing the repeated trouble?

It could be done. His father had done it. Taikokajin, Tsukiyume's mother, had clearly done it. Hanyou existed everywhere…why not between he and Rin?

Rin pressed closer behind him, her breath still coming fast. "Why does my lord fear Lord Shimofuri? What has he done?"

"He has done nothing. He wishes his sister to return into his household." He paused and, as he took hold of the screen door and slid it open, he decided to risk saying something foolish. "He may have a marriage intended for her, some other important purpose."

Rin snorted and then looked down at the floor, frowning openly. "Sesshomaru-sama." She murmured coldly, "Hanyou are worthless in the royalty. You have told me it many, many times."

Sesshomaru did not answer. He was treading on eggshells, and they were crackling, shattering beneath his feet. Crossing the threshold into his room he paused a few steps from the door, listening. Rin waited outside. She would not enter unless invited. Despite himself and what he knew to be right, Sesshomaru felt the idea of sharing his bed with her quite appealing. His body hummed, feeling warm. Although he could never understand how she knew it exactly, Rin could sense these changes in him. It was the only invitation she needed.

She crossed into his room and boldly shut the door behind her. When Sesshomaru turned to face her now he threw her a glare and stood stiffly, frustrated and torn in two. "I did not ask you to join me."

Rin fell to her knees in a bow, submissive at once. Incurring his wrath wasn't a good thing. They might argue and discuss, but outright, bold anger from Sesshomaru was always a bad thing. She would have to leave if he stayed that way. She had read his desire correctly, but she knew him to be contradictory and often times surprisingly in control of his more animal urges. "Rin apologizes, Lord Sesshomaru."

Her hair was still pinned up. The long ponytail spilled around one shoulder and coiled on the floor. Long, black, shiny, and smooth. It would be smooth as her skin, and likely fragranced from her last bath. Again Sesshomaru struggled with his longing.

"Does Sesshomaru-sama wish me to leave?"

He paused, considering for quite a long time. Then, despite his better judgment, he answered her, "No, you may stay Rin."

She sat up but did not look at him directly yet. "May I write to Lord Shimofuri and ask him to allow Tsukiyume to stay with us?"

Alarm shot through Sesshomaru, he was glad Rin wasn't looking at him, searching him for clues. He turned his back on her, facing his small writing table and his futon instead. "No, you may not. I have made my decision Rin, it is final."

When she answered her voice was tight, "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru."

Thickly, Sesshomaru went on: "I will be leaving tomorrow with Tsukiyume. I will be absent for a time to visit with Shimofuri and Sasugainu in the Middle Lands. You will manage in my absence?"

Rin's voice now was small, tiny, almost weak. "How long, my lord?"

Though she could not see it, Sesshomaru closed his eyes and fought the need to sigh. "A few days. When I return I will have gifts for you from the Middle Lands."

"Yes, my lord." Her words were a little cold, a little distant. She was no longer arguing, but she was certainly upset.

Sesshomaru sighed now at last, unable to restrain it. He moved slowly and sat on his bed. After a long moment of silence, Sesshomaru peeked at Rin cautiously. She had kept her face neutral, but the stiffness in her shoulders told him she remained tense, wild and untamed. The thought of taming her only served to arouse him. He buried the thought hurriedly in favor of self control, but he'd already given in to the desire long ago.

"Come," he gestured with his single hand at his futon, at the furs and coverings, "Join me."

Rin's face was still down turned; she would not meet his gaze. "Perhaps it would be best if Rin were to leave Sesshomaru-sama for this night…"

Now _that_—rejection!—just would not do! He narrowed his eyes at her, compelling her to look at him. She would melt; she would crumble if she did. She could not resist him. "Rin." He called her name in a particular, deep-throated purr that drew her attention.

They stared at one another for a moment. Rin's human brown, a deep, dark color like the earth, a symbol of fertility and beauty. Sesshomaru's bright, powerful gold, like sunlight, enough to warm and sustain, or to burn and kill.

He repeated his command. "Join me." This time she obeyed, bowing slightly and then pushing herself off the floor and moving toward him. She sat beside him, her face stony, and her body stiff. Sesshomaru ignored this and reached out to caress her ear, exposed by the hair she had pinned back to practice hand to hand combat. He used one talon, tickling gently. Those same claws could rip rival youkai to shreds. To Rin they were used to tease, to caress. She resisted a tiny bit at first, not looking at him, but then a long breath left her. Her proud shoulders sagged, a tiny, coy smile tried to play at the edges of her lips.

The battle was over, Sesshomaru had prevailed.

* * *

Early the next morning Sesshomaru left Rin, still sleeping. There were many things that needed to be done in this day, traveling, dragging Tsukiyume away from Rin and to Ginrei, keeping Tsukiyume in the secret palace confined and restrained…

And there was also the matter that had finalized his thoughts on the matter too: the strange letter that Rin had mentioned. Sesshomaru sought out his old teacher, Kuenai.

The old sensei barely slept anymore. In his old age he was obsessed with calligraphy. His small chambers on the premise were covered in kanji of multiple types, multiple styles, and even different languages. Half of it Kuenai likely couldn't read properly, but he could make the characters, that was all he cared about. To practice, in one corner of his room, the old grizzled inuyoukai kept a small rectangular box, filled with sand. He used a long stick to draw into it whichever characters he wished.

When Sesshomaru came to Kuenai's chambers early that morning, he found the old inuyoukai standing with his eyes closed over that box of sand, long drawing stick in hand. He was dozing, but when he heard the door slide open he snapped awake and turned irritably, still yawning. "You damnable maids, go away before I—" he stopped, eyes bugging out with surprise as he saw that it wasn't a maid that had disturbed him.

"My lord." He fell at once to his knees, grunting a little as he did so. Sesshomaru could hear his knees pop.

"Rise, sensei." Kuenai did so and faced Sesshomaru with a wary but respectful gaze. "Rin tells me that Tsukiyume received a letter while you were instructing her."

Kuenai cringed. "Yes—I tried, my lord, I tried to take it from her but she ran from me and my legs are not what they once were…"

Sesshomaru interrupted him, "You have reason to believe it was a letter that may have, in some way, threatened me?"

Kuenai bit his old, thinned lips. "There are many things, my lord, that I suspect threaten you."

Sesshomaru blinked once. "Explain sensei."

The old inuyoukai huffed, breathing loudly, "The hanyou girl, my lord, I believe she is a danger to you. Like a spy in our midst for her brother and uncle in the Middle Lands. I do not trust them, drawing on your resources such as they have, my lord. And…" he took a step forward, leaning in as if to whisper a secret though he and Sesshomaru were several feet from one another, "I believe Lady Rin's grief may be her fault."

Sesshomaru smiled inwardly, amused at Kuenai's conspiracy theories. It was always the habit of those with a lot of time on their hands to worry and ponder the plots and intrigues of others. "What do you mean?"

Kuenai ducked his head embarrassedly. "Your children, my lord. Lady Rin's lost children."

Sesshomaru tensed. "Do not speak of that." He ordered, glaring.

Kuenai apologized hurriedly but he would not be put off now that he had his lord's ear. "I apologize my lord, but I must say, I have seen this before in my long years. The children are lost because of sabotage."

Despite the taboo of speaking of Rin's mascarriages, a very private, painful matter, with an outsider, Sesshomaru was enthralled. Kuenai was a wise youkai, long lived and well educated. He had served under Inutaisho and seen many, many things. Sesshomaru dared not underestimate him. "Sabotage?"

The old sensei nodded solemnly. "Sabotage. Someone sprinkles a little contaminant into Lady Rin's tea, sprinkles it onto her food. Over time the tiny unnoticeable toxins kill the pups. She suffers almost no sign, but they are damaged and killed."

Sesshomaru felt a coldness sweeping over him. At first it was nothing but a small chill, then a great, icy wave. _Sabotage. Tea. Toxins._ He kept his voice quiet and cold, "Who do you suspect, Kuenai?"

"It would be someone close to Lady Rin, someone who prepares her meals. They may be paid by someone else—like that upstart in the Middle Lands, Shimofuri." Kuenai spat.

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed slowly as he considered this. The idea was an excellent one. It was probably right. There was only one way for him to know, and that would be to remove Rin from the castle, to keep her somewhere else to avoid the contamination and to see if there she might carry a pup to term. Then he would know for certain. Ransacking the maids and the cooks was also an excellent idea, but if one had been bought off another could certainly be taken…

So who was it that was paying the maids to poison Rin? Despite Kuenai's ideas, Sesshomaru doubted it was Shimofuri. The letter still worried him, but the poisoning had to have been going on for a long, long time. Longer than Shimofuri had had power or reason to cause trouble for Sesshomaru and Rin.

In that case, who else? Was it Nishiyori's doing continued on even after the old lord's death and conquer? His jaw tightened, his lips thinned, pressed in on themselves, the only sign of Sesshomaru's worry.

"I thank you Kuenai, you have been an excellent help. You will be pleased to know I am getting rid of the hanyou girl today."

Kuenai sighed with obvious relief. "Oh happiness my lord, it is a perfect decision on your part!"

Sesshomaru excused himself from Kuenai's chambers and moved next to where Tsukiyume's chambers were, placed further inside, closer to the royal quarters. He waited outside while the maids scurried to get Tsukiyume roused and dressed. With his keen ears he heard the hanyou girl mumbling sleepily, being dragged about and manhandled by the maids. They combed her hair, spritzed her with perfumed oils, styled her hair, and picked out fine robes for her. All this in the space of five or ten minutes while Sesshomaru waited outside the doorway.

When the sliding door was opened, Tsukiyume stood before him, with the maids backing her so she wouldn't fall over, yawning into one hand. Her kimono sleeves were long and elegant, more so than Sesshomaru would have liked considering they were going to be traveling all day. When she saw Sesshomaru standing in front of her, the hanyou girl yelped with surprise and—fear?—and fell into a clumsy, sleepy bow. "Lord Sesshomaru!"

"Tsukiyume." He acknowledged her, coldly. "Today you will be accompanying me to a small palace in the Isei. There your training will continue for a time of my choosing. When you have completed the time I require of you there, I will allow you to return to your brother, Shimofuri."

The hanyou girl was facing the floor in her bow, but Sesshomaru could see her shoulders shaking. "Yes, my lord."

"Come, we leave now."

The girl stuttered, "My things—I must say goodbye to—"

"I will have your things sent to you later. You have no time to say goodbye to anyone. Follow me." He turned and began walking away down the hall. The maids pressed in behind Tsukiyume and in a moment she was following him as well, her kimono rustling all around her, so much showier than what they usually dressed her in for classes. She should have known from the moment they woke her and dressed her in it that something strange was about to happen…

* * *


	7. Bargaining

A/N: Random thought of the day! This is disturbing. Rather than blowing ourselves up, imagine the human race comes to an end because men cease to exist. Just men. The reason? The sex chromosomes. With XX chromosomes there are two, just like all the rest in our genome. If one gene on one X is bad then the other backup X chromosome is used and information is not lost. But in the Y chromosome there is only one. An X and a Y. The Y has no backup. When genes are lost they are really lost. There are a thousand individual genes on the X chromosomes. There are only like 80 on the Y. Originally, scientists believe, there were a thousand genes on both the X and the Y, but over the millions of years the Y has decreased dramatically. Some think at this rate the chromosome will be lost altogether, leaving only the X's. This makes me sad because I like men. :,( And also it would spell the end of us by sexual reproduction at least, if not the end of us permanently. I cry. But rejoice! There are men still today. We're not extinct just yet!

I had the single worst weekend I think of my life. Well, maybe. Why? I went home for the weekend. First within hours my sister came to me and interrogated me, making me swear on our grandmother's grave, about seeing my boyfriend, about what I have or have not done with him. Ugh. I'm an old woman, almost 21. Why can't my family respect my decisions?? And after that my father cheated me out of money. Originally we planned to share a final college payment half and half to spare my account. BUT he tried to change it out on me, making it sound like it was all my responsibility. I was stupid and asked my mom about it and that brought up huge tensions on their money troubles and a huge fight has since ensued and it gets no one anywhere.

As for Runaway…HOLY wah…the response! So many wrote in. It seemed like this story, only 6 chapters in, is more popular than I Miss You with all 31 of its chapters. Wow. Sheesh. I'm not sure what to think about that but it is interesting and I have enjoyed every review. So far most of you think Ginrei is okay, that's awesome...awesome...

Disclaimer: I don't own any of it

* * *

**Bargaining **

There was little discussion while they traveled. Sesshomaru was stiff, tight-lipped, and maintained a swift pace. To keep up Tsukiyume avoided thinking about anything if she could, focusing only on the movement of her feet, left and right, left and right.

A snowstorm had appeared out of the blue. Gray-white clouds floated inland, a wind picked up, nipping and bitter. Tsukiyume was grateful now for the kimono the maids had picked out for her that morning. It was a dark color, absorbing what little heat the light had to offer. The wind tugged at her hair and her ears caught snowflakes, which then melted and tried to freeze all over again. The delicate organs were soon numb, but Sesshomaru carried on as if he felt nothing. Not the wind, not the snowflakes hitting his face, not the numbing effect it had to have on his toes…

Tsukiyume wasn't sure she could hold out, but at last she saw signs of civilization. A larger path, trimmed hedges, signs of gardens. Humans scurried about, trying to work despite the horrible wintry conditions. They occasionally stopped to watch Sesshomaru and Tsukiyume pass, but if the lord showed them any attention they at once turned back to their duties with renewed vigor, a silent apology for having been caught gawking.

The trees were covered with frost and icicles and accumulated snow. The wind carved the drifts of it along the side of the road into beautiful formations. Tapered and shaped, as if by mortal hands for decoration. They allowed Tsuki to forget the pain and numbness of her limbs and the tip of her nose for a time, observing the drifts and wondering at the perfection of nature.

There was a palace ahead of them, across a small wooden bridge. Humans hurried around it, clearing the path of accumulated snow and watching Sesshomaru worried. At last, as they reached the bridge leading across the now mostly frozen lake, a bald man rushed forward and bowed low.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" he greeted the lord of the Western Lands. "We welcome you back to your palace…"

"Out of the way." Sesshomaru ordered tersely, and then stepped past the stricken little man. Tsukiyume scurried after him, feeling tiny like a mouse and very eager to get out of the flurrying snow. The bald man watched her with wide, interested eyes as she passed. He had a knowing expression, one that told her he understood that she was hanyou. He saw her dark hair topped by the white ears like whip cream, and he knew she was of a mixed union.

She felt a slow sense of foreboding steal over her. With a shudder, she hurried after Sesshomaru and into the palace.

They slipped out of their shoes, as was custom, and were lead into the palace proper by a chubby, smiling maid. "We are pleased to see Lord Sesshomaru has returned so swiftly to us." She was saying, "Shall I take you to see Lord Daken?"

"Yes," Sesshomaru answered blandly, and then stepped aside slightly and gestured with his single hand at Tsukiyume, still shivering and standing just behind him, as if hiding. "This is Taikokajin Tsukiyume. You will escort her to meet with Ginrei."

The maid nodded and stepped forward. Tsukiyume responded as if the maid were a threat and backpedaled a little, glancing to Sesshomaru worriedly. "Lord Sesshomaru…" she started, but the powerful inuyoukai lord had already stepped further down the hall and disappeared.

Tsukiyume swallowed nervously and then turned to the maid, nodding that she would follow. She was led upstairs and into a small meeting room. The tatami mats had a stale smell, and something bothered Tsukiyume about the entire place. It was not within the Western Lands, but rather it was apart of the Isei. She had never really been to the Isei, but she knew she was sitting in stolen lands, in a stolen castle. This room had seen war, it had seen different owners, different women. She realized, looking around at it, that it was a pleasure palace, a place of relaxation and calm. It was also a place for lords to house their ladies, mistresses, daughters, and wives. Sesshomaru had taken her to this place, was she now being housed in this palace for owned women? What was Sesshomaru up to?

_He said I would go home…_

At that moment the maid reappeared and opened the sliding door, falling into a bow. "Lady Taikokajin Tsukiyume, please meet Lady Sesshomaru Ginrei."

Tsukiyume stared incredulously at the maid, her mouth fell open. Pieces were beginning to fall together now. Ginrei, whoever she was, would never be introduced with Sesshomaru's first unless she was his daughter or his wife. Tsukiyume tensed, preparing herself to meet Sesshomaru's secret wife.

A small woman entered the room, easily as small as Rin, but unlike Rin who could capture a room with her beauty; this inuyoukai didn't immediately startle Tsukiyume out of her wits. Ginrei sat slowly across from Tsukiyume, her eyes cast downward shyly. Tsukiyume studied her unabashedly, even rudely. Ginrei was pale skinned, but her coloring was off-white, not quite like porcelain, but rather like cream—if she had been healthier or happier. There was a slight grayish hue to her skin. Her hair was darker than Sesshomaru's more silver than white. Her eyes, when Tsuki saw brief flashes of them, were light blue—almost silver as well. The maids had painted her lips lightly, a soft pinkish color. Bright red would have contrasted with her otherwise intensely pale coloring.

It was odd, Tsukiyume realized, to be sitting across from such a pallid female. Rin was the only other woman Tsukiyume had grown close with beyond her mother, Taikokajin. Taikokajin had been an albino with pink eyes, and that pinkness had somehow kept the rest of the whiteness and pale pallor from being overwhelming. Ginrei, however, was overwhelming.

Ginrei slowly, cautiously, lifted her gaze to meet Tsukiyume's scrutiny. "You are Lady Taikokajin's daughter?" she asked.

There was something in Ginrei's tone that sent a shiver through Tsukiyume. There was a stillness, a coldness that set Tsukiyume on edge. She paused before at last answering, "Yes," and offering a small bow, "Lord Sesshomaru calls me Taikokajin Tsukiyume…" she paused uncertainly before at last asking, "You are Lord Sesshomaru's wife?"

Ginrei nodded, "Yes, I am." The silvered eyes turned away, staring at the wall just past Tsukiyume's head and losing focus. "Your brother is Lord Shimofuri?"

Tsukiyume hesitated, sensing the strangeness inside Ginrei's voice. "Yes, that's right."

With a deadly stillness, Ginrei absorbed this information and then spoke, "Then it was your brother that is responsible for killing my entire family."

Tsukiyume stiffened, feeling a jolt of alarm pass through her. "What?" when Ginrei did not speak immediately Tsukiyume stuttered, trying to explain herself helplessly. "My lady, I'm sorry—I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about. Lord Sesshomaru has kept me in his castle in the Western Lands as a hostage for several months. I know nothing of what shishi—my brother—has been doing. But you must believe me, it is not like my—Lord Shimofuri—to be cruel…" she shook her head frantically, "My brother is not a killer, my lady…"

"It was his war." Ginrei answered, her face stony, "His war and Lord Sasugainu's, that killed my family."

"I'm afraid I don't understand…" Tsukiyume's ears fell backward hopelessly. "No one has ever involved me in politics, great lady…"

"Lord Sesshomaru spared me from execution by marrying me." Ginrei said, sounding distant and cold, as if Sesshomaru had given her lessons, but underneath it, much easier than she could ever have detected on Sesshomaru, Tsukiyume could sense the anger within the inuyoukai woman. "The rest of my family was killed by Shimofuri and Sasugainu in their war."

Tsukiyume frowned, "I'm afraid I don't know anything about that, Lady Ginrei. I've been locked away by Lord Sesshomaru for months. But I do know that it wasn't my brother's war. He would have avoided it at all costs, my lady. He would have sought peace." Her mind worked frantically, picking out defenses for her half-brother. "And shishi-sama could never have won the war without help. The war was as much Lord Sesshomaru's war as it was shishi-sama's."

Now Ginrei looked at her directly, eyes wide so that the whites were prominent and wild, "What did you say?"

"Lord Sesshomaru gained more from the war than my brother did, by far." Tsukiyume swallowed hard, realizing that Sesshomaru could have her killed for what she was saying, though it was general knowledge by most, "The Isei province has been annexed to the Western Lands, this palace is now Lord Sesshomaru's, but it was Lord Nishiyori's before…"

Ginrei was silent, stiff, unmoving. She sat like a statue; hands folded in her lap and clasped hold of one another. Her fingers gripped her wrists so tightly that the tips turned white.

"I'm sorry, my lady," Tsukiyume stuttered. For a moment she tried to reach out to Ginrei but the inuyoukai woman noticed her movement and flinched away as if Tsukiyume had made a motion to slap her. Tsukiyume withdrew, sinking into herself and flattening her ears. "I'm sorry…" she mumbled again, helplessly.

Ginrei's eyes began to cloud with tears but she blinked at the fiercely and turned her face away. "I wish you to leave me." She murmured, quietly.

"Please, my lady, I'm sorry. Please, I don't understand what happened to you, I didn't know what I was saying. Honestly," she stumbled desperately over the words, trying to offer some sort of comfort to the stricken girl, Sesshomaru's _wife_. "No one tells me anything. Don't believe a word I say."

Ginrei made a small noise, a cross behind a snuffling laugh and a stifled sob. "I am the same way." Her fingers twitched a little in her lap, Tsukiyume noticed that the claws were very tiny and delicate. Ginrei was a born and bred lady of the court, true nobility. Tsukiyume's mother had had claws much like that. They were tiny and refined, but strong all within themselves. "My father hardly ever spoke to me. My male cousins were much the same way." She sighed, shoulders sagging. "They are all gone now."

"I'm sorry," Tsukiyume started, only to be interrupted as the door slid open again and the maid was there, announcing the arrival of Sesshomaru and Daken.

Tsukiyume fell into a bow at once, but Ginrei remained sitting up, defiantly. Daken spoke first as he sat, across from Tsukiyume. "It's good to see you ladies. Tsukiyume is it?" he asked, signaling the hanyou girl that it was time for her to sit up. Tsukiyume did so, taking in the old grizzled inuyoukai. Daken was a familiar face to her, but only just barely. She knew he was a contact of Sesshomaru's; she had never spoken with him before.

She nodded but did not speak to him. Her eyes traveled worriedly between Sesshomaru and Ginrei. Ginrei did not ever remove her eyes from Sesshomaru. Her expression was one of open anger, but her eyes displayed a hurt, a sense of betrayal. Tsukiyume stared at her hands in her lap, feeling like a moron. _What have I done?_

"Tsukiyume." Sesshomaru called her.

The hanyou girl looked up, startled, and blinking rapidly. "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru?"

"I have brought you here by Lady Ginrei's request. You are to keep her company and offer her lessons in self-defense." Sesshomaru did not meet Tsukiyume's gaze directly, rather he pretended to look at her but really saw nothing. His manner was distant, his voice uncaring. Tsukiyume felt herself shuddering. _How can he do this to Rin?_

As if Sesshomaru had read her thoughts, he said, "You may only write to your brother while you are in this palace. After a year I will allow you to return to him."

Tsukiyume swallowed nervously. "A year?"

Sesshomaru didn't answer; he was staring directly at Ginrei now. His golden gaze narrowed dangerously. "Do you have something to add, Ginrei?"

Daken was smirking, as was his usual expression to every situation, but it was coupled with a look of nervousness, something Tsukiyume felt very acutely as well.

Ginrei said nothing, but she did not back down her glaring either. The tension in the room remained very high and with no relief in sight, Daken started to chuckle with nervousness. Had a modern human heard it he or she would have been reminded of a hyena giggling on the Serengeti. Tsukiyume stared at Daken as if he'd gone mad. Sesshomaru even glanced at the old inuyoukai with an expression that might have been a sneer. (A/N: I did this when my sister interrogated me. There was a pause and the tension inside me just snapped and I started laughing gleefully. Totally out of place. I kept waiting for her to smile and laugh with me…never happened.)

At last Sesshomaru said, "I will speak with Lady Ginrei alone."

Heaving a heavy sigh, Tsukiyume got to her feet, stumbling a little in her haste, and hurried out of the room. Daken walked just behind her, stiff and regal looking for once. Perhaps, she thought, he was trying to recover from the outburst of giggling laughter in such an inappropriate moment.

"You should meet with Jaken downstairs, Lady Tsukiyume." Daken suggested as they stepped out of the room. The maide slid the door behind them shut with a little clatter.

Tsukiyume blinked, "Lord Jaken is here?"

Daken coughed—a sound that was meant to disguise more nervous, tittering laughter. "Yes. He will act as a tutor to you and Lady Ginrei."

"A tutor?" she asked, incredulously.

Daken nodded, "But right now Jaken is a lonely little pest. He needs someone to babble with. He's outraged that Lord Sesshomaru married behind his back."

Tsukiyume turned her face away so that Daken would be unable to see the way she rolled her eyes and fought laughter of her own. "I'll go down and speak with him." inwardly she thought, _what about Lady Rin? It is terrible that Sesshomaru married behind Jaken's back I suppose, but what about Lady Rin? How long has this gone on?_ She tried to remember Ginrei's scent but found that it was minute, barely noticeable. Sesshomaru's scent wasn't on her, which likely meant the marriage was new, and perhaps not consummated…

But what other reason would Sesshomaru keep this woman, the only survivor of her slaughtered family, unless it was for children? For heirs?

She held her questions and went down the stairs like a zombie. _How will I tell Lady Rin…?_

* * *

Alone with Ginrei, Sesshomaru asked, "What troubles you?"

"It was you." Ginrei sneered, "The hanyou told me."

Sesshomaru forced his face to remain impassive. There was no reason to jump to conclusions. "Explain."

Ginrei narrowed her eyes at him with new, fresh anger as she spoke. "She told me her brother is not a killer."

"All little sisters would say that to remain loyal to powerful older brothers. I'm sure you would say that none of your male kin were killers. They were warriors." He didn't like where this was going, but there were lots of cold, logical things to throw at her, to confuse her and make her think clearly again. That was the plan, anyway. Chances were that she would find out of his involvement one way or another. She would realize she was not just a spoil of war randomly passed out by Shimofuri and Sasugainu, but rather she had been _planned._ She had been _asked for._

Ginrei did not hesitate still and her anger did not falter. "She told me that Shimofuri gained nothing from the war—_you gained from it."_

Sesshomaru hesitated before he spoke. Could he deny the truth? No, it was impossible. She deserved the truth. "Yes, I did gain much from the war."

"You took this palace, the entire Isei—_my home…"_ Ginrei's eyes filled with tears of rage, "My family. It's because of _you_ that they are all _dead."_

"All but you." he answered her, blandly. "I have spared you and given you this palace. You are in a position of individual power now that you never would have had before." To Sesshomaru this sounded like a good tradeoff. Unfortunately he was not female and he had never had to love, and then lose, an extended family.

Ginrei curled her lips, exposing her canines, letting them gleam in the dull light from the braziers in the corners of the room. "You. Are. A. Monster." She enunciated each word; her small hands were fists in her lap. "I should kill you."

Sesshomaru cocked his head to one side, allowing amusement to course through him. "I am your husband."

"Against my will!" she hissed, and then, shaking, she looked away, fighting a new bout of tears. "You are a monster."

This time her words reached him more emotionally. Sesshomaru thought of Rin, of their lost pups. He thought of how lonely she would be alone by herself, without Tsukiyume now. He considered Shimofuri, alone and unwed in his mother's old castle, haunted by her and without the half sister he loved so dearly. All the creatures he had harmed in his long years, even the half-brother that he could not truly care about…

Ginrei was by far the most wounded of his victims. She had lost her entire family to a war he had ensured her side of the clan would lose. She was alive herself only because he had asked for someone unrelated to him and she was the first they had found.

She had every right to be furious with him, but it would not suit Sesshomaru to allow his wife to kill him. In fact, it would not even suit for her to be angry with him and glaring at him as she was. He picked his brain for a peace offering. What could replace her dead family…?

"Lady Ginrei." He began carefully and with respect, he did not look her directly in the eye, allowing her instead to stare at him openly while he spoke, "Perhaps I might suggest a compromise."

Her face rippled with a mixture of confusion and new, fresh anger. "A compromise?"

"Yes," he ducked his head once in a very small nod, "I have said that as my wife I expect you to provide me with a son. I will take your first son as my heir, and then you will be free. With this freedom I will give you the Isei province to rule. You may marry again if you wish and produce your own heirs. You may make a new branch of the inuyoukai clan, one bearing your own name, or Nishiyori's, or Seiyo's."

Ginrei was shaking, though exactly with what emotion was impossible even for her to say with certainty. She had not been raised to crave power or to seek it out, but it was apart of her blood anyway. Nishiyori had lived a long time, and through all of it he had sought to make a name for himself, to be rich and powerful. Seiyo, the younger half-brother who had fathered Ginrei, was much the same way, though perhaps more bookish. Ginrei's mother was learned, a gentle and tender beauty. Ginrei herself would have happily followed in he rmother's footsteps, demure and calm.

But now she was offered power as if she were a troublesome male, an upstart giving Sesshomaru trouble. He was offering her a sort of bribe. _Serve me loyally and without trouble and you will be rewarded._

A thought came to her, brought on the wings of her anger over her dead family, over the unbearable loss of it…_if I am powerful, if the Isei becomes my own, I could rival Sesshomaru, or I could take Shimofuri's land, Sasugainu's…_

She thought of Taikokajin, the female ruler of the Middle Lands. As a child, Ginrei had heard the other women speak with awe of her: "A woman ruling the Middle Lands." None of them could believe it. Taikokajin was like a dream to each of them. Tucked inside Nishiyori's castle, they would never see this legendary female in her position of power, but they turned her into a legendary figure.

Ginrei tried to imagine herself fulfilling a similar legendary rule and could not. She felt weak in the face of it. She had never managed anything, only her studies. She was educated, but she felt it gave her no power, only appeal because she was intelligent. Beginning Nishiyori's clan again…it seemed an impossible, a task of god-like proportions.

For a moment she studied Sesshomaru, seeing his features, wondering if she could even trust him with such a bargain. He wanted an heir, not a wife. He might wait for her to birth a healthy son and then have her executed.

But no matter what she choose, and whether or not Sesshomaru held true to his side of the bargain, Ginrei would have no way out. She would have to sleep with her "husband" and bear his pups. She would still have to serve the man responsible for destroying her family…

Forcing her face to appear cold and stony, Ginrei bowed. "I accept your proposal, Lord Sesshomaru."

The corners of Sesshomaru's lips twitched, perhaps fighting a smile. "We will drink on it." he told her and then turned, calling out to the maids near the door. They scurried about and only a few minutes later sake was brought in and set before the stony, stiff couple. Ginrei drank hers remembering their awkward, disastrous wedding. This time her stomach was like a rock, she held the alcohol well enough and, when Sesshomaru dismissed her, she rose to her feet and exited the room for her bedroom.

Alone inside she sat beside her futon, considering her "wifely duties." Sesshomaru was perfectly attractive, but Ginrei could only see him as her captor and the monster that had destroyed her family. She calmed herself by thinking of the bargain they had struck. Sesshomaru had shared sake with her on the deal, making it a serious matter. Perhaps he would hold true to it and give her the Isei province as soon as she bore him a son, an heir.

Gritting her teeth, she sat on the futon and composed herself, burying her emotions, her fear, her uncertainty, her anger. She vowed to become a mindless vessel with one purpose this night. She would pray that it would only take this single night.

Ginrei called to the maids, asking them to send word to her husband that she desired to see him. The message was sent out and in a few minutes Sesshomaru arrived, moving a little more stiffly than usual. The maid slid the door open for him but did not announce him as he entered. Ginrei had doused the lights inside her room, making it hard for her to see Sesshomaru's face. She knew that the light from the hallway would make her own face visible to him.

"Ginrei?" he asked, sounding—at least for him—distinctly uncomfortable.

"Lord Sesshomaru." She answered, trying to sound gentle but cold, not terrified and shaking with remnants of rage. She addressed the maid next, "You may leave my husband and I alone."

The maid bowed and scooted away on her knees, sliding the door shut behind her. Ginrei listened as the maid's footsteps receded down the hall a good ways and then proceeded down the stairs.

Without the light from the hallway anymore, Ginrei could only make out Sesshomaru's white hair, flowing richly down his body. His skin was dark against it; his mouth when he opened it to speak was even darker. A black hole of space and treachery. "Why have you called me here, Ginrei?"

She bowed on the futon. "I am to give you an heir." She swallowed thickly. She'd had a detailed plan of seduction laid out inside her mind. In the plan she announced her intentions and took her clothes off to arouse him. The talk amongst her female kin had been that males were so husky that the sight of any female disrobed would send them into a frenzy. _Beware bathing! If a man sees you it will be the end of you!_

She wondered if it would work on Sesshomaru, so distant and cold as he was. Perhaps he was impervious to the sexual frenzy that her female kin spoke of. Then she wondered with a rush of fear: _Can I even go through with it?_

Ginrei touched the obi around her kimono tentatively. Her fingers and hands shook, feeling weak, but they found the ties in the back and released them allowing the obi to come unwrapped and fall free. Until the war had ransacked her home, Ginrei had worn the bowtie obi, a sign of her virginity and status as an unwed female. Now, since marrying Sesshomaru, her obis were easier to untie and remove, a sign of her change in status. She was now supposed to be non-virginal, the sexual toy of her husband.

"What are you doing?" Sesshomaru asked, though from the sudden intake of breath and the increased heart rate, she knew he understood what she was proposing.

Ginrei pushed the obi away from her body and bowed low on the futon again. "Lord Sesshomaru." She muttered against the blankets. "I am ready to give you an heir…" her words choked themselves off; she stumbled over them like a clumsy child. She tucked her hands underneath her legs, hoping Sesshomaru could not make out the way they shook.

"You understand," he began, tightly, "That our agreement is not subject to time."

"There is little reason to put it off. I am—" she stopped, choking again, "…your wife."

There was a long, tense pause. Then Sesshomaru announced, "You are not ready." He turned his back on her and took a step for the door.

Ginrei rose from her bow and called out to him, "No! Lord Sesshomaru, please. I am ready."

He turned round and stared at her through the darkness. Ginrei felt like cringing, but she didn't want to reveal any weakness. The moment went on and on, but when she did not say anything else and did not flinch away from his searching gaze, Sesshomaru at last strode forward. Ginrei tensed and resisted the urge to look away from him as he approached. Instead she allowed her eyes to lose focus. Her heart took off; her palms grew sticky and moist with sweat as he came and sat down at the edge of her futon.

He reached out for her, taking her chin gently in his fingers and turning her face so that she was staring at him more directly through the dark. When she blinked her eyes adjusted and she found herself staring at him. Her night vision grew acute in that instant and she saw the honeyed color of his eyes, felt the warmth of his skin and entire body next to hers. His scent was also rich, provoking a reaction from within her that she had not anticipated. She fought the urge to shiver, both with fear and an excitement that she couldn't understand.

"Are you certain?" he asked, gently.

Ginrei nodded, jerking her face away from his grasp as she did so. She risked raising one hand to her shoulder, praying that it would at least appear steady, and pulled at her kimono, trying to take it off. He only had one arm; he was likely to have enough trouble getting out of his own clothes.

The robes, inner and outer, slipped free of her shoulders easily enough, exposing her breasts, her arms, some of her stomach. She stiffened up against the chilly evening air, focusing on the long term goal of her actions. She forced herself to stare in Sesshomaru's direction, but she allowed her eyes again to lose their focus so that detail slipped away. Before her eyes lost focus, she did manage to see Sesshomaru's honeyed gaze taking her in, judging this specimen that would mother his heir.

Without warning he moved toward her, pressing his face close to her, inside her personal space. Ginrei gasped at the suddenness of his action and stumbled back somewhat, but she regained her control enough so that she didn't try to flee from him. She remained where she was, stiff, her breath picking up with nervousness. Sesshomaru pressed his nose and lips to the crook of her neck. Ginrei heard him inhale sharply, taking in her scent.

With each breath she was doing the same, and feeling a strange warmth spreading instinctually through her own body. The wilder side of her, the animal side, recognized that Sesshomaru was powerful and strong, an excellent male to father offspring. Her body's gut reaction was desire, but her mind didn't follow suit, it found near-panic. Only the higher goal forced her to stay put.

He moved his lips over her shoulder, leaving a tiny moisture trail behind, tasting her faintly. He moved inward, tickling her chin and her ear with his lips in this manner. In spite of herself Ginrei felt her body beginning to relax, but her mind was rushing, fighting to stay distant and in control. Her brain felt like a bird caught inside a house, fluttering from one wall to the next, frantically seeking an escape that didn't exist.

At last Sesshomaru stopped, breathing hotly into her hair. "You are not ready."

"I am." She answered; her voice was thick, throaty, but shaking with fear as well.

"Your body is ready. You are not." He withdrew from her slightly, enough so that he could search her face critically. Ginrei stared back at him, breathing in deeply, trying to steady her mind enough to lie convincingly, to gain the upper hand again. Before she did, however, Sesshomaru moved in without warning once more and kissed her, fiercely, vigorously.

At first Ginrei's body responded with warmth, making her stay, but her mind reacted secondarily with shock and outrage. She pulled away, backing up, messing the blankets on the futon. She breathed roughly and stared at him with wild eyes.

"It is as I said. You aren't ready." He turned his back on her, facing the door now. "Dress, Ginrei. There will be another time when you are ready."

Hotness swept over Ginrei's face. She pulled feebly at her kimono and then pawed around the futon for her obi. "What does it matter?" she snarled quietly, half to herself.

Sesshomaru answered her, much to her surprise. "Do not assume that I am low enough to force myself on you." he rose from the futon and strode to the door, slid it open, and exited.

Alone once more, Ginrei let out a long, deep breath. Her hands shook and her mind was no better. She had sweat quite a lot in her nervousness and now felt damp and sticky. Fear had vanished, leaving frustration in its wake with anger not far behind. She had counted on Sesshomaru being mindless and prone, like all males supposedly were, to sexual frenzy. Unfortunately he had surprised her. She would need to overcome her fear before he would accept that she was, in fact, ready.

Tears attacked her then and Ginrei sighed, giving into them. She tucked herself below her blankets and hid her face from the empty, darkened room, and prayed for courage. She would need it if she was to right the wrongs committed to her family…

* * *

Oi, what did you think about that eh? Hehe... 


	8. Memories At Jouka

A/N: I still cannot fathom the popularity of this story. As I sit here I have only posted it an hour or so ago, chapter 7: Bargaining, and already it has a solid two reviews in on it. Crazy, crazy. I'm excited as I write this one because in the past I've always focused on IY and Kagome and what their children would look and be like. In this one I have two options: Rin or Ginrei's children. I can see the way their features might mesh. I've always liked the thought of a dark-haired child with the gold/honey/amber eyes of the Inutaisho line. Rin would provide that but Ginrei's pups would look like Sesshomaru through and through. That is, of course, why I picked those features for her.

In the last chapter I tried to show a trait of Sesshomaru's I would hope to be good. He has great self restraint and honor. He needs to sleep with Ginrei to conceive his heir, but he won't do it if she isn't entirely willing. Essentially he refuses to "take her against her will." Although Ginrei said she consented and was undressing for him in her mind she was anything but ready and he could see that. It may be a business arrangement, but in his heart, Sesshy has noble sentiments.

I've been considering babies and baby names for Sesshomaru's heir. I have been thinking Seihaisu. It roughly means, according to the online Japanese/English/English/Japanese translator I found online _seiha—_conquest, and _aisu—_ice. Ice in my mind to represent both mood and features, because Sesshomaru and Ginrei are both very pale. Conquest obviously because well, yeah. Sesshomaru's heir. I like Seihaisu also because it has the "ei" combination like Ginrei's name. If you hate it tell me, I'll try to work up a different one. Sesshomaru's name has some sort of meaning like "endless killing circle" or something like that, doesn't it? I don't speak Japanese so I do my best with the translator to make names. There is also _Hanone—fang _which I plan to use on a daughter somewhere.

Disc: Nope don't own them

* * *

Last Chapter: Ginrei discovered through Tsukiyume that Sesshomaru was partially responsible for the death of her family. Sesshomaru has brought Tsuki to keep Ginrei company. He plans to educate Tsuki and Ginrei there together, for the time being with Jaken who he also brought with him. To make peace with Ginrei, Sesshomaru made a bargain with her. After his heir is born she is freed from him. She will gain the Isei province to herself to do with as she pleases. Ginrei tried to come up with the courage to "seduce" Sesshomaru so that she could start this process, but Sesshomaru deemed her not ready and refused. Their marriage remains unconsummated.

* * *

**Memories at Jouka**

The snowstorm intensified through the night and into the next day. When Sesshomaru rose at dawn he felt the chill in the room he had chosen to sleep in acutely. It prickled his skin. He allowed himself a scowl of distaste. After searching for his robe, he called for the maids and ordered them to burn the braziers around the palace and check all of the shutters.

Sesshomaru summoned Daken to him next. The old, grizzled youkai joined him, shivering, on the balcony overlooking the lake. Fatigue and age lined his face heavily this morning, but to his credit he didn't complain. He took a spot near Sesshomaru with a thick sigh and stared out over the frozen lake. The ice was gray and cracked, a dangerous stuff that would drag anyone who dared walk on it into a freezing, watery grave.

"Lovely view, my lord." Daken started, laughing. "What is it you wish from me on this fine morning?" there was a tiny pause and then he spoke again, smirking, "How was your night, Lord Sesshomaru?"

Sesshomaru threw him a very cold glare. The night before he had been called away by the maids, told his wife wanted to "speak" with him. Sesshomaru had left Tsukiyume, Daken, and Jaken alone while he traveled upstairs and "visited" with his wife. He hadn't returned to continue their conversation. Now Daken had the audacity to ask about it.

"You will not ask me such a question ever again. Do you understand me, Daken?"

"Certainly, my lord. I take it things went badly?" he smirked and then began to cackle a little, unable to help himself. In some ways Sesshomaru was like a son or a grandson, which gave him more rights and confidence when it came to dealing with the stoic lord of the Western Lands. But now he realized this was not a laughing matter. He closed his mouth and blew out a breath, trying to release tension. "I apologize, my lord. I crossed the line. I am sorry. I offer my life as penance."

Sesshomaru's lip quivered, almost giving way to a full-fledged sneer. "I will not require that sacrifice from you just yet." He straightened up a little, getting down to business. "I have a task for you."

"Yes, lord?"

"I need you to return to the Western Lands for me. Find Lady Rin and take her to one of my other battlements for a time." Sesshomaru stared out at the cold, frozen lake, unmoved by the snow drifts, the flow of the snow as the wind pushed it about over the cracked ice.

"Please excuse my asking, Lord Sesshomaru, but why? Isn't Lady Rin safest inside your castle?" Daken frowned, openly confused. The lines deepened in his face with the expression, aging him. He was unhappy with the thought of traveling through the mountains, but it was preferable to sitting about in the palace on the lake with the tensions pervading every inch of it.

"That is none of your affair, Daken. Take her to Jouka in the southern province. See that she is well cared for and assure her I will visit soon, within the week."

"Yes my lord." Daken bowed, "When must I leave?"

Sesshomaru moved his gaze—just his eyes, not the rest of his body—toward Daken. The amber irises burned powerfully against the muted white and gray-blue world of the dawn snow around them. "Now."

Daken sighed but he bowed again and excused himself, hurrying away.

* * *

After two days the snow subsided somewhat. Sesshomaru remained inside the secret palace, relaxing mostly, but on occasion directing construction on the palace and meeting with some of his advisors—new ones, men and youkai in charge of the Isei. He judged each as he met them and made them swear allegiance. Some he executed at once, distrusting them or knowing them to be traitorous by rumor.

The Isei was coming under his sway easily. Nishiyori had been a ruler of similar principles to Sesshomaru, much as he hated to admit it. The underlings came willingly to him, unresistingly. Many of them, especially those along the border with the Western Lands, were even eager to do so. They agreed with Sesshomaru's steady rule, his lack of involvement in wars.

What they didn't know, of course, was that Sesshomaru was very warlike. That was, of course, how he had acquired the Isei in the first place. War, power, and alliance.

He instructed Tsukiyume to inform the change of plans to her brother. He did not bother searching her letters now, it didn't matter anymore. With Rin out of his castle, even if Shimofuri planned to harm Sesshomaru by writing directly to Rin it would not reach her. Sesshomaru had eliminated threats as far as that was concerned. And sending Daken to move Rin away from the reach of sabotage might change things as far as the miscarriages were concerned.

Yet Ginrei still bothered him. It was below his honor to force himself on her, and it would not help in conception either. He had to hope that with time Ginrei would allow desire to overtake her and fear and anger would diminish. Time apart from the massacre of her family, away from the trauma of being the only survivor.

Worse than that concern, however, was the deception he played with Rin. Keeping a secret such as this from her was difficult. Sesshomaru tended to believe it was more trouble than it was worth. Logically, any way he cut it, the truth should be revealed to Rin, but he could not imagine how to do it. Rin would not handle the truth well and he dreaded revealing it to her. If he told her while she was carrying another baby it was likely to induce another miscarriage.

As much as he wished he could hide his marriage from Rin, he knew it was impossible. In time Ginrei would conceive a child. If the child was a girl it could stay within the secret palace indefinitely. If it was a boy Sesshomaru would want to take the child under his wing as soon as it could be weaned from Ginrei's breast. The child would be impossible to hide from Rin, and there was no doubt in Sesshomaru's mind that it would clearly be related to him and look that way. He could not lie to her and say that the child was an adopted cousin or some such thing.

There was only one good thing about all of these problems: they could be put off. Ginrei was not pregnant yet and Sesshomaru wasn't truly in a hurry to change that because it would inevitably force him to face Rin with his heir.

In spite of this, Sesshomaru made an effort to sit with Ginrei alone every night, attempting to force her to get accustomed to his presence. Most often they did little more than sit on the balcony, shivering in the wintry wind, but occasionally they would speak together. Tutoring, no matter how bad her teacher—Jaken—was, did manage to stimulate Ginrei's mind. She was more at ease, haunted less by the loss of her family, the massacre that had brought her to Sesshomaru. There were times when she did still have nightmares. A nap during the day might end when she woke, screaming and crying. When he heard these outbursts, Sesshomaru pitied the inuyoukai girl and regretted the way that things had been done. Sesshomaru would have been a prime candidate amongst the clan for marriage. They would have leapt at a chance to _give_ him one of their daughters, but that would mean Sesshomaru was allied to one of them through marriage. He hadn't wanted that, so he had cheated, destroying a whole clan to claim one bitch.

He paid this price now by having to work to make her comfortable around him. There would always be some inner grudge that she held against him, and rightly so, but Sesshomaru would work hard to gain her respect, to perhaps make her into an ally. If he did hand the Isei province over to her it would make her powerful, and if she had other children with him, another son or a daughter, it would be wise for him to keep her on good terms and under his control. The bargain he had struck with her called for the first son. It said nothing of daughters or of other sons, and this partially intimidated Sesshomaru. Ginrei needed to be an ally; he needed to trust that someday she would not try to turn against him with the power he had rewarded her with. Or with his own offspring.

It was all a dangerous game, and all of it gave him a headache. He preferred war to secrets and ill-gotten heirs any day.

* * *

"Tell me about her." Ginrei asked, watching Tsukiyume with all of her being.

"Well…" Tsukiyume settled into a crouched stance, raising her arms in a defensive position. "What do you want to know, my lady?"

"How does a woman rule over men? How did she do it?" Ginrei had yet to bother mirroring Tsukiyume's stance. She was a very poor student physically. She also, since she'd stopped seeing Tsukiyume as the close kin of her family's murderers, had trouble closing her mouth to learn.

"Stand as I am." Tsukiyume ordered, curtly. She imagined Rin within her mind, the small, frail human female throwing orders out when Tsukiyume had been a new, frightened student, uneducated in almost everything. She tried to project the same fierceness that Rin had. Rin was a sensei, a master in her own right, and Tsukiyume modeled herself after her mortal teacher. It brought a wave of nostalgia for those lessons, for her long bouts with Lady Rin. "Hold up your hands and prepare to ward off my blows."

Ginrei took in Tsukiyume's stance and mimicked it weakly. "Did she teach you this? Did your mother—"

"My mother was not a scholar." Tsukiyume interrupted her, trying to control her irritation. "Mother neglected most of my education. It was my—others that taught me how to read and write."

Ginrei's fighting stance, already a weak imitation, faltered. She frowned, analyzing Tsukiyume's words. "Shimofuri taught you, not your mother?" her voice had grown colder, more distant.

"Yes." Tsukiyume answered her, pursing her lips. "I'm not supposed to be telling you my family history, Lady Ginrei. I'm supposed to be teaching you how to defend yourself, how to fight."

They were in an open room of the secret palace. It was not necessarily meant for fighting lessons, but it was a sensei's room. The screens were blank and boring so that a student's mind could not wander, but would instead be forced to absorb the information being thrown at it. On one side the screens had been slid open, letting a cold breeze flow in over the two young women. The narrow strip of the outside world it revealed was a white one, bright and cold. The lake was frozen and covered over with a blanket of thick snow. The trees were piled high with it as well.

Tsukiyume and Ginrei, her student, wore thick robes to combat the cold, but their feet were bare. Their hair was pinned back tightly. They fought without swords or poles today, it was a beginner's lesson—self defense. There was nothing for Ginrei but her own hands, arms, feet, legs, and her claws. She would take the lesson differently than Tsukiyume had received it a few months ago because Ginrei was a full blooded youkai. She was less defenseless, supposedly, than Tsukiyume was as a hanyou. But while Tsukiyume was hanyou, her sparring partner had often been Rin, and despite the fact that they seemed unequally matched Rin had often won against Tsukiyume, and they had always drawn a sweat in the exercise.

Ginrei seemed uninterested in learning this lesson. In their other studies Ginrei was far advanced over Tsuki. She could read more characters, write more of them as well, and with better proficiency. She had been taught multiple styles of kanji and script. She was also an accomplished artist, having been trained and having practiced from a young age within the Nishiyori clan. She had competed against other women of similar birth and talent. Also far different from Tsukiyume, Ginrei had been taught how to dance and she excelled. As a youth the inuyoukai girl had been well known as an artist and a dancer. Had she not been assumed dead by the rest of the inuyoukai clan there would have been many clans willing to adopt her as a sensei to their own daughters.

Compared with Tsukiyume, Ginrei was cultured and educated; she was indeed a perfect, courtly wife. Even alongside Rin, Ginrei was the better specimen when culture and education were thrown into consideration. But as far as defending herself, Ginrei knew nothing, and it seemed she had little interest in it.

"Wives do not fight." Ginrei murmured, scowling. "Why does Sesshomaru wish this to be apart of my lessons? Is he evaluating my physical strength?"

Tsukiyume sighed, dropping her fighting position. "Lord Sesshomaru asks this of all…" she stopped, uncertain what to say. Her first instinct had been to say "captives." She doubted that would go over very well. In truth she didn't know why Sesshomaru wanted his wife to know how to defend herself. Unless he felt there was a threat, a looming war or human uprising, it seemed pointless to teach Ginrei how to fight. Ginrei was right, she was a wife, she would always be protected. And considering the circumstances, it would make more sense for Sesshomaru to leave Ginrei defenseless and untrained. Who would want to risk having a wife that might slaughter you in the bedroom?

"He taught you this?" Ginrei asked then, cocking her head slightly to one side. She too had dropped her battle ready position, poor as it was.

Warily, Tsukiyume shook her head. "No." she lowered her eyes, remembering Rin again, wondering what she was doing, if Sessomaru had told her in a letter or in person. He'd left when the snow had at last abated and the temperature rose a little. He'd been gone for nearly two days, leaving Tsukiyume under Jaken's watch and teachings. Other tutors would arrive, she was told, newly hired. He had not forbidden Tsukiyume from writing to Rin specifically, although it seemed such an action was likely against his wishes. Tsukiyume had started many letters to Rin, but none felt right. It was too distant, too cold. She could not imagine hurting her friend so brutally. No letter had been sent out as a result, and Tsukiyume had not tried to write another recently.

"It was not Shimofuri that taught you to fight. It was not Sesshomaru. It was not your mother…" Ginrei was thinking, her face was twisted up in a little knot of frustration. "I didn't believe it was commonplace for a woman to be taught to fight. How is it that you were taught how to fight, but not the higher arts, as I was? You are a daughter of nobility."

Was it wise to tell Ginrei anything about Rin? She decided to try and avoid it. Tsukiyume crouched again, taking up the fighting stance. "You are not part of our family, Lady Ginrei. I would ask that you refer to my brother as _Lord Shimofuri."_

Ginrei's face soured. She stood still, her body stiffed, but when she spoke her voice was even, though a little thin, "Yes, Lady Tsukiyume."

This drew pause from the hanyou girl. A smile pulled on her face, in spite of herself. "I'm sorry—no one's ever called me that before."

"You were introduced to me that way." Ginrei pointed out.

"I know but…" she let the smile come, small and timid, "…in casual conversation I'm not used to a title…"

"But you are the daughter of the ruler of the Middle Lands." Ginrei maintained the fighting stance like a statue, stoically. Only the movement of her blinking and her lips revealed that she was living.

"Yes, I am, but…" Tsukiyume paused again, half-choking on her words. "My mother is no longer the ruler of the Middle Lands."

"Your brother is. You are still royalty." Ginrei's face was unemotional, statuesque. She was wearing the Noh expression, a dancer's mask. She was treating the fighting stance as if it were the beginning position of a dance from Noh theatre. (A/N: As I write this I believe I am making a mistake. Noh theatre for whatever reason, is strictly male performed I think. But since these are not humans we'll pretend that it works and that the men are so busy at war that it's the woman's hobby. Kabuki came along several centuries after the point at which _Inuyasha_ is placed, I think. I believe Kabuki was the first theatre to allow women to play their own roles. Sometimes. I might also have this mixed up. It might be Kabuki that forbade women and Noh that allowed them, I can't recall.)

Tsukiyume shook her head, still perplexed, "True, but I'm…"

"A woman?" Ginrei asked. Her silvered eyes flicked to meet Tsukiyume's startled gaze. "But your mother was Lady Taikokajin. Why should your gender matter when she held power as she did, for as long as she did?"

Tsukiyume frowned. "Stop it. Drop your stance. That's not what I was going to say."

Ginrei relaxed and faced her with a more angry expression now, challenging her. "What were you going to say, Lady Tsukiyume?"

"Stop calling me that!" Tsukiyume snarled. Her white dog ears flattened atop her straight black hair. "I was going to say I'm _hanyou._"

This seemed to affect Ginrei genuinely. She blinked, her anger faded, leaving uncertainty, and perhaps even a spot of pity. "I…I was never told anything about hanyou. It is a mixed creature…?" she shook her head, helplessly. "Are you one part inuyoukai and another part…" she squinted her eyes, examining Tsukiyume carefully, "Wolf youkai? But that's not right, I can't smell wolf on you…" she frowned, lost.

Like fighting, this was another issue that Ginrei had never been educated on.

Tsukiyume sighed, letting her shoulders sag, letting the tension leave her body. "No. My mother was Lady Taikokajin, but my father was human—a monk named Kokoro." She lowered her gaze and focused on the floor, remembering a time months ago, when her father's spirit had interceded and saved her life, though he had never lived to see her birth…

"I didn't know…" she frowned, "I've heard the term before, but no one explained it to me." A small twinge of color spread over Ginrei's cheeks. "I wasn't aware it was even possible."

"It is." Tsukiyume responded uncaringly. "But now you see why even my mother couldn't hand over her kingdom to me. Even to my brother I'm useless. No one from the clan will marry a hanyou."

A bitter smile planted itself on Ginrei's young, tender face. "Then we have something in common. I'm useless now as well. Without my family, I'm as good as dead. There is no honor left for me anymore. Once my _husband_ is finished with me…" she gestured with her hands to the room, the cold breeze, the chokingly bright snow outside.

"You think Lord Sesshomaru will toss you aside after…?" Tsukiyume had not learned the exact reason behind Sesshomaru's deception and secret marriage to this inuyoukai girl, but she was about to find out why Ginrei thought she was here, a fellow captive to the great and powerful Lord of the Western Lands.

"After I give him a son. He promised to set me free after that, with the Isei province as my own but…" Ginrei crossed her arms, seeming to fold into herself, helplessly. "How am I supposed to rule a province? How can I trust him when I know he helped kill my family?"

Tsukiyume cringed as she smelled fresh tears escaping from Ginrei's eyes. "He's your husband." She replied, blindly.

Ginrei's tears were overwhelming, the questions, the strangeness of her mood, her extreme education in some areas and complete ignorance in others. Tsukiyume wanted to take up the fighting stance, to bury these concerns, some of which she herself mirrored about Sesshomaru, in the sweat and exertion of a battle. When she'd first come under Sesshomaru's care Tsukiyume would have placed complete trust in the inuyoukai ruler. Yet, since learning of his recent deception and true motivation for helping Shimofuri in the war in the Middle Lands, she had serious doubts.

Sesshomaru's hanyou brother, the legendary Inuyasha, was one worthy of trust. He was predictable though lawless and outcast from nobility. Sesshomaru was the complete opposite, regal and endlessly complex. While Inuyasha did what he did out of a need to protect himself or his closest kin, Sesshomaru served only himself through twisted, exploitive ways. Ensuring Shimofuri's cooperation by holding his hanyou sister hostage. By securing a wife by slaughtering her family in a war that he negotiated and supported. He did what he felt he needed to do to survive, and if possible, to thrive.

He was a creature of conquest, of rule. Could he really ever be trusted to come through on right and wrong? Could Tsukiyume believe Sesshomaru when he told her that in a year he would allow her to go home? Could Ginrei believe him when he promised her the Isei, a future of riches, respect, and power?

There was one thing she already knew: Rin trusted Sesshomaru when she shouldn't have. But how could she have ever known to suspect otherwise?

* * *

Sesshomaru spent eight days with Rin where Daken had hidden her in a battlement in the southern province of the Western Lands. It was called Jouka, less of a castle and more of a palace. The first summer after Naraku had at last been killed; Sesshomaru had housed Rin in that palace and begun training her vigorously. He wanted her to be unlike any other human. She would at least appear as powerful as any demon.

He had specialized armor forged and re-forged for the girl, changing it each time she outgrew one set and into another. The best teachers and trainers were hired for her. Rin was taught intensively to read, write, and fight. While Sesshomaru traveled and waged wars or settled them, Rin's letters reached him by courier on the front lines. He watched from a distance as the orphaned child he'd resurrected and given a second chance grew in intellect and grace.

There were many years that he spent apart from her. Periodically he forced Jaken to leave his side and return to Jouka where Rin was housed and trained. He loaded the toad with gifts for the girl. Whenever the toad returned he was full of stories about Rin, how she'd grown up and was becoming a beautiful woman, how her speech and movements were refined and elegant. She asked for him all the time, Jaken reported, and longed for the rare instances when Sesshomaru answered her letters with one of his own.

Often Sesshomaru wished he could see her again, but he restrained himself. In his mind she was a tiny child still, a daughter to be sheltered from the wrath of the world. He knew, somewhere, that this was not true—Rin's own letters had matured greatly. It was the writing of a young woman, not a child. And she didn't write to him as if he were a father or a brother.

When Jaken reported that Rin had reached marriageable age, Sesshomaru found himself shocked. Her teachers and trainers insisted that Rin should be given away to marriage within the Western Lands, to seal an alliance with one of the samurai lords ruling within Sesshomaru's territory. Although not born into nobility, she had been trained and adopted into it. She was a beautiful girl, the time was ripe. It was the best way for her to serve him now.

Sesshomaru couldn't deny their counsel. Cutting his travels short, Sesshomaru had Rin ferried to his largest castle within the Western Lands, and he returned as well—and saw the orphan girl again for the first time.

Rin overwhelmed him. She was the same child she'd been when he'd saved her, but at the same time she was someone entirely new. She was a woman, proud, noble, and exceptionally beautiful. Even more alarming, she remembered him so well from her childhood that she was able to read his emotions from the moment they saw one another again. As she had while a child, she followed him incessantly around the court, she took every opportunity to speak with him.

As the samurai bachelors presented themselves a month later, Sesshomaru found that none of them met his standards. He bristled at the sight of each one; his claws itched to tear them apart for every stray glance that fell on the young Rin. The samurai offered their loyalty, offered their lands, their support, their funds, their troops. None of it reached Sesshomaru's ears. Emotion, for the first time in his life as the ruler of the Western Lands, ran wild within him. Turning away the generous proposals of each samurai wasn't a good move for the Western Lands, but Sesshomaru couldn't see past his growing possessiveness.

It was the curse of the inuyoukai. The guard dog. Rin had become his within his mind and though it was part of the plan to give her up, he found more and more that he didn't want to and never had.

She was spellbinding. In the springtime, while Sesshomaru reviewed her suitors, he knew that Rin was practicing riding a horse through the gardens in the armor he'd had newly forged for her. Often long before the samurai lords were finished making their proposals, Sesshomaru dismissed them, almost rudely, and left the stuffy meeting rooms to watch her from the balconies. Her horse was a light gray roan, her armor painted the deepest black. She let her long, straight black hair flow as she rode, wild in the wind. She painted her face to appear fierce—white with red stripes on her cheeks, mimicking Sesshomaru's own demonic marks. When she stumbled and fell from the horse in one instance, Sesshomaru could not restrain himself from rushing—leaping from his high, hidden vantage point on the balcony—to save her.

And as the springtime wore on into summer—with the idea of marriage to some human warrior looming inside her mind—Rin at last spoke her mind. It began timidly. She wrote brief poems and had Jaken or one of her teachers pass them to Sesshomaru during the day. The poems were of nature, haikus, things that Sesshomaru had never cared much for, but admired nonetheless. And then she began with short letters again, speaking to him with ink what she dared not say aloud.

_I hate humans, Lord Sesshomaru. It was humans that killed my mother, my father, my brothers. In my heart I am not human, I am inuyoukai. I wish to remain with Lord Sesshomaru my entire life. _

It took little to convince Sesshomaru to cease the search for a suitable husband. There never would be one. Rin belonged at his side, in his castle, with him.

Eight days beside her in Jouka allowed Sesshomaru to immerse himself in those memories, of the desire that had taken over him without his even realizing, of the bond that had grown and transformed between them. For a time he could forget the Isei and a very different palace there, a very different woman that was attached to his fate.

With the past alive around him, Sesshomaru gave almost no thought to sharing his secret betrayal with her. But his memories of brighter times weren't the only excuse he had now: Rin's scent had changed, yet again.

She was pregnant.

A few short years ago this would've excited Sesshomaru. He would've cut off his travel plans, stalled his meetings, and given into the instinct to dote on his pregnant mate. He'd acted that way before several times, but always the couple's excitement turned to grief as Rin miscarried. Rin counted five lost babies in four years. Sesshomaru counted much more than that: ten, perhaps even fifteen.

Now Sesshomaru was excited again, but at once he was also troubled. It was too soon for Rin to know for certain, but the moment she suspected it she would become stiff, as if afraid she might break herself. She spent most of her time in bed; she limited her activities, anything she could in a desperate attempt to keep the precious new life that had sprung up inside her. This included secluding herself from Sesshomaru's company.

With the move to Jouka Sesshomaru had reason to hope that this time the child would not be lost, Rin's efforts wouldn't prove themselves in vain. If Rin's losses were because of sabotage in the other castle than it stood to reason that the move to Jouka would leave Rin healthy and safely pregnant. There wouldn't be grief; there would be excitement and celebration.

Yet he couldn't bring himself to believe this or share it with Rin. He always counseled her not to hope and not to worry. If she worried it would only sicken her and the child within her, and if she hoped it would only make the pain at the miscarriage more horrible. Now he offered himself the same counsel and elected a cheater's way out of the situation, for the time being.

Another journey to the Isei province on "business." Another dispute over land in the province because of war. He would settle them and return to Rin in the Jouka in a week or so. In the meantime Daken would look after her, and should anything come up, Daken would deliver the news.

He was certain that Daken would be sent after him in only a few days, as Rin realized that she was pregnant. He would return to her swiftly then and try to wait things out—though he had come to hate these moments. To Sesshomaru they were deathwatches, and he was the vulture, awaiting the end. He despised the waiting, it was a waste. Another loss drowned in blood, another reminder that Sesshomaru the great leader of the Western Lands, was childless and unable to sire viable offspring.

Another small, but deep and scarring blow to his pride.

The idea of success, rather than failure, seemed dismal, bleak, and outright impossible.

* * *

and I'm out of here. :-) 


	9. Battle for Dominance

A/N: So what do all of you think? Is it true what the old inuyoukai Kuenai right about the sabotage? Will Rin carry a child to term now? I shall keep my secrets…**BUT I have a question to ask**: lying before me I have a plot debate. One is shorter and simpler, which I'm more inclined to go with right now. It will be less heartache for Rin and it will progress this story to the point I promised in my title: Runaway. The **_second_** storyline is longer and more complex and generates more pain for Rin, but it helps demonstrate Sess's guilt. Unless I hear major outcries for the longer of the two, I'm going to spare poor Rin some suffering and condense my storyline ideas somewhat. Anyway, just throwing that out there.

Sesshomaru is a deep, sometimes despicable character. I remember, and am running off an episode I saw where Jaken described him to Rin as power-hungry, after conquest. I believe he is that way, so he really would be this ruthless. Yet at the same time his behavior toward Rin in the series shows he has a heart. He would likely be an excellent father. Like Inuyasha he demonstrates the desire to protect those that follow him. I believe Inutaisho left him the Tenseiga because he wanted Sesshomaru to grow a heart. Inuyasha has one, Sesshomaru's is there, but buried beneath all the conquest. Wasn't he charged with protecting Inuyasha? Or was that never mentioned? At any rate we all know he broke that in his desire to obtain the Tetsusaiga. He's also a creature of grudges. The clan didn't help him in the war against the invading panthers. So he hates them. Part of me also thinks he holds a grudge against Inuyasha because he was pinned to a tree when Sesshomaru needed him for the panther wars. (I swear, in that episode, Jaken goes looking for Inuyasha, finds him pinned, and reports it to Sesshomaru, and Sess is so mad…) Anyway, that's a little of my interpretation. The question is, can I get him to grow a heart…?

A lot of you are probably going to hate me or hate this chapter. I'm **WARNING** you now. There's some Sess/Ginrei action here. Before anyone yells at me I would like to say they are both inuyoukai, animalistic, harsh. They may conduct themselves most often with reserve and elegance, but at their core they're like wild animals. I imagine things between inuyoukai as rough and harsh, although they are also capable of tenderness, as I'm sure Sesshomaru treats Rin. Ginrei is hardier, Sesshomaru treats her as such. You'll hate me anyway, but oh well.

Disclaimer: Nope, not a chance. I only own my own characters.

* * *

Last chap: Ginrei and Tsukiyume are beginning to explore each other. Ginrei has some strange ideas, she is well educated, cultured, but she has a growing power complex with female leadership. Tsuki misses Rin. Sesshomaru sent his messenger Daken to move Rin from one castle to another: Jouka in the south. He hopes there she will stop her miscarriages because the old inuyoukai Kuenai suspected that was what was truly causing them. He has been trying to get Ginrei to warm up to him, but it's a difficult task. He spent a week with Rin as well, during which he realized she has yet again become pregnant. Rather than stay from day one he left before she realized she was pregnant, but he left Daken with her. While at Jouka I described how Sesshomaru raised Rin and trained her and eventually fell in love.

* * *

**Battle for Dominance **

Jouka was full of memories and old ghosts. Long years ago, Rin had wandered the halls as a child and an adolescent. Her teachers and trainers followed her. Some had been human, but most were youkai, which was the way that Rin liked it. Only a few of her writing instructors were humans, because it was humans who mastered poetry, and multiple forms of calligraphy. Rin enjoyed their classes, but liked to pretend that they had tails poking out of their robes, or scales on their skin.

Humans unnerved her, especially in those early days. It was the youkai who had saved her, fed her, protected her. She owed Sesshomaru everything and she made it a point to show him how grateful she was. Under the floorboards in her childhood room, Rin had hidden hundreds of letters from every year of her life growing up in Jouka. While Sesshomaru was away she wrote to him every thought that passed through her head, every poem her teachers preached, every new kanji character the sensei showed her.

After Sesshomaru had left her in Jouka again, as his mate and an adult, Rin huddled in her childhood room, hearing the past, even feeling she saw it.

Jouka was largely abandoned now. Without Rin hunkering inside it, Sesshomaru had allowed the grounds to deteriorate and he'd moved a number of the servants to his other, larger castle, Nejiro. She had no idea why he'd moved her back to Jouka now. She sensed that he was holding secrets, that he was troubled, but with the outburst of travel lately she never managed to wear him down, to figure him out. It was as if Sesshomaru understood this and wanted to avoid it. She had always startled him by being able to see straight through him, to his core, to read his secrets as if they were letters.

Rin gathered her robes around her, thick to combat the cold and gold colored today to dispel her gloominess. She trudged out of her room and into the hall, searching for the balcony. Jouka was perched high on some cliffs, overlooking a small valley below. As she recalled there was a wild river there, untamed with a rough, whitewater current. Upstream as well as down it was farmed, pulled into wide irrigation channels by farmers growing their rice. But in this narrow section that Jouka overlooked, Rin could see the wilderness and admire its beauty.

Sliding open the door, a bitter wind blasted her, rushing through her hair. Rin frowned and shut it again, but she didn't remove her fingers from the latch. The freedom of the outside world, though it was covered with cruel, biting snow and scoured by unforgiving, relentless winter wind, still called to her through the doors. She cursed her weak human body and withdrew slowly.

In the fields beside that river, Rin had been taught by a monkey demon to ride a horse—not only to ride, but to ride as a man would. A human sensei never would have taught her such a thing. They were biased, refusing to share the knowledge, power, and freedom of riding the horse. An inuyoukai could never have taught it to her either because horses spooked around most youkai. The monkey demon, however, was one of the few that was not seen as threatening. He was a gentle, hairy beast who adored horses, he had the innocent fascination of a child and he meshed well with Rin as a result.

Horseback riding had been one of Rin's favorite activities, and she had excelled at it. As a human she found she could turn it into an art that the inuyoukai never could. She learned balance with the armor Sesshomaru had forged for her; she painted her face to appear as if she were youkai rather than human. She rode as if she were going to war, and sometimes angered her sensei by racing the horse away toward one of the villages downstream to terrify them.

"Lady Rin!" a low, old woman's voice tore Rin out of her memories. She turned and spotted the hunched, wrinkled form of Jijo, her favorite caretaker when she'd been a child.

"Jijo!" her face broke out in a luminous smile and she hurried forward to meet the old woman, hugging her tightly. "It's been so long…"

Jijo had refused to leave the local area when Sesshomaru had transferred Rin out of Jouka and into Nejiro further north. She claimed moving at her age would likely be the death of her, and at the time she had been very ill. Rin had doubted the old woman would survive the winter, but now, years later, Jijo had proven her wrong.

"What have you done with yourself for all this time, Jijo?" Rin asked as she separated from the old woman, still smiling warmly.

"I'm a healer, the villages employed me." Jijo rasped, her voice was worn with age, just as her face was, but despite this age she was still wiry and strong. Her voice carried authority within its depths. "I heard Lady Rin had returned to Jouka, and I had to come back."

"Yes…" the last time Rin had seen Jijo she'd been a youth, a teenager, about to be auctioned off as Sesshomaru's strange human ward. A prize catch for the samurai lords. The only human girl to ever have been raised as a demon…now she was Sesshomaru's mate. She wondered, as her cheeks began to heat up, if Jijo had ever heard about it.

"How long are you staying? Has Lord Sesshomaru abandoned you here again?" Jijo's old, wrinkled face twisted into a playful, knowing smirk. "You're wondering what I've heard on the wind, aren't you my girl?"

Unabashedly, despite her reddened cheeks, Rin answered firmly, "Yes, I was just thinking that…"

Jijo laughed heartily. "I heard the samurai weren't good enough. I heard the old dog called them off and was quite taken with you." Jijo's voice lowered then, loosing its good humor then, "I also heard that you have been suffering some great misfortune. Your unborn babes…"

At this Rin looked away, covering her mouth with one hand as if to stifle her own words. "Is that really such common knowledge?" she whispered.

Jijo sighed heavily. "It is mostly just rumor. The villagers guess. They hear the old dog takes a human as a mate and then they wait for the hanyou to be born. They talk—some say Lord Sesshomaru will not allow you to birth him hanyou." She frowned deeply, "But I know that isn't true."

Rin had turned back to stare at the old woman with horror. "How could anyone say such things?"

"Humans gossip." Jijo answered. "You mustn't let it bother you. It isn't true, that is what matters most—not the idle words of a bunch of useless humans, nothing more than peasants and jealous samurai lords."

Rin shook her head and began to walk, slowly, as if entranced, down the hall. "Don't tell me anymore, Jijo."

"As you wish, Lady Rin." Jijo bowed, though Rin had her back to the old woman and would never see the movement, "May I stay here and serve Lady Rin? I apologize for troubling her, it will not happen again. I am a healer; you may have need of me…"

Rin nodded to herself. "Yes, Jijo. Of course you can stay." She smiled slightly to herself, beginning to recover, "It will be nice to have some female company again."

* * *

When her husband returned to the palace on the lake, the maids dressed Ginrei in the rich white winter robe he'd brought as a gift on a previous visit. Ginrei admired the robe for the first time, seeing its richness, its beauty. Indeed, Sesshomaru was a powerful, wealthy lord. She wondered if this robe would be allowed to stay with her after their marriage technically ended.

The maids led Ginrei and Tsukiyume, both dressed richly for meeting with the great returning lord, onto the balcony that overlooked the icy lake. Sesshomaru was already present, staring stonily over the landscape. He didn't look up when the maids slid the doors open and announced Tsukiyume and Ginrei's entrance. They sat, as would be custom, with Tsukiyume farthest away and Ginrei close to her husband.

The morning was bitter and still. The air was unmoving and freezing, as if waiting, ominously. Ginrei sat at Sesshomaru's side and snuck quick glances at her husband as she bowed in greeting and respect. Tsukiyume did the same next to her, but her bow was deeper, almost cowed. The hanyou girl still had reason to respect Sesshomaru. If she behaved well she might be sent back to her brother. If she behaved poorly she put herself in danger, because after all, she was a hostage.

Ginrei was caught in uncertainty. Serve this undeserving husband in the hope of being rewarded? Or thwart him at every turn to punish him for his misdeeds? She'd learned some new things from Jaken in his absence, but none of it in her mind redeemed him. He'd almost single-handedly fought away the invading panther demons of over fifty years ago. He survived and even thrived away from the clan's influence and support. He kept his lands happy, well-fed, and usually at peace. His father was the legendary Inutaisho. There was a younger brother, she'd heard, but Jaken had refused to speak anything more aside from a name: Inuyasha. Tsukiyume appeared to think highly of him—in spite of the fact that she called herself Sesshomaru's hostage and wished to return to her brother—although her belief had been shaken, though by exactly what Ginrei wasn't sure of.

"Tsukiyume. Ginrei." Sesshomaru acknowledged them each in his calm, distant voice. "You are both well?"

"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru." Tsukiyume answered, sitting up first. "And you?" she offered him a small, nervous smile.

Sesshomaru ignored her. "Ginrei, how are your studies? Jaken has informed me that you are well educated."

Ginrei didn't look at him when she answered, instead she directed her eyes out over the lake, taking in the brightness of the bitter snow and the deep dark green of the pine trees scattered around the lake. "I was raised by nobility; of course I'm well educated."

Her rudeness actually made Sesshomaru blink, but only once. "You would do well to learn your place." He murmured, sounding remarkably casual.

Tsukiyume had begun shivering slightly and wringing her hands together. Her white dog ears twittered like a rabbit's nose. "It's certainly cold out here this morning!" she remarked briskly, glancing worriedly between the irritated dog lord and his estranged, rude wife. "Perhaps Lady Ginrei and I should retire indoors; we could continue one of our fighting lessons that Lord Sesshomaru—"

"Tsukiyume." Sesshomaru interrupted her. "You are excused."

For a moment the hanyou girl blinked, baffled at this latest development, but obediently she bowed and rose to her feet, exiting the balcony and disappearing inside the palace.

Alone with nothing but the picturesque morning stillness between them, Ginrei waited for Sesshomaru to speak. She slipped her hands up inside of her kimono and curled them into fists, remembering her fighting lessons with Tsukiyume. The hanyou girl had continued wearing Ginrei down, and eventually Ginrei saw the fights in a different way. She pretended they were dances and learned the movements. Tsukiyume's body was graceful and swift when she demonstrated the motions and explained how one day they might possibly save Ginrei's life. Ginrei grew to admire the motions and the idea of strength behind it. She committed her first lessons to heart and already she could feel a new confidence growing within her.

As the silence stretched on, Ginrei risked examining her husband's profile, his body. He had only one arm but she made out the strength of his body in spite of that loss. She wondered where he had lost it, why, and what he'd been fighting for and who. Her pulse quickened at the idea that he wasn't immortal, that there were days when he was fatigued, when he was weak. Perhaps he was already leaving his prime. His face, however, did not speak of age, or of any lack of strength. His jaw was strong and powerful, but elegant as well. He was well-bred. His mother, whoever she'd been, was a beautiful woman. The red-purple streaks on his face were perfectly straight. The pale hair, long and smooth, his lips surprisingly full and tender in appearance.

It was a shame the rest of him wasn't tender. She might've loved him, he was certainly beautiful enough.

"You are to behave properly, as any good wife." Sesshomaru told her, finally breaking the thick silence. "Do you understand?"

He sounded, Ginrei thought, as if he were speaking to a child. "Yes, I understand." She moved her sleeves together so that her hands could touch without Sesshomaru seeing them and without the nasty, cold breath of the outside world chilling them. She felt her fingers, her claws.

"I will not be visiting you for sometime after this." Sesshomaru announced, calmly. He was examining her carefully as he spoke; Ginrei could feel his gaze on her face. It was heavy, uncomfortable.

That news should've pleased her, but Ginrei found her reaction to be one closer to alarm or perhaps insult. Sesshomaru had helped kill her family; he had forced her to marry him. It seemed only to add insult to injury for him to say he would be absent from her now. "Why?"

"That is none of your affair." He answered blandly.

"I'm supposed to be your wife." Ginrei muttered, daring for the first time to stare at him openly. He had not removed his own gaze. Gold met with silver. "How long does my husband intend to leave me? How can he expect an heir if he is never here?"

Although she used respectful terms, her tone was one of derision and bitterness. She was challenging him fearlessly.

"I am needed elsewhere." Sesshomaru answered with equally respectful words and a tone that was chilly and distant, but his golden eyes blazed with warning and anger. "I will return in a matter of months. I will leave Daken with you as a messenger if you should require me."

"Oh husband, I would never survive that long." Ginrei snarled now, openly, throwing daggers with her eyes, promising murder.

At last Sesshomaru's patience had worn thin. He turned his full attention to her, narrowed his golden, fiery gaze. "You will control yourself."

"I _will not."_ She sneered, and then, abruptly, she lunged at him, growling, deep and dangerous. She slashed with one hand and, having moved with speed that Sesshomaru hadn't anticipated, she caught the inuyoukai lord's left shoulder, tearing into the fabric of his robes violently. The fabric screamed and screeched as it was torn asunder, allowing Ginrei to feel a brief surge of triumph as her claws grazed over Sesshomaru's skin underneath.

Sesshomaru snatched her wrist up then with his single right hand and jerked her roughly away. Ginrei was thrown to the balcony floor. The force of Sesshomaru's one armed toos was enough to send her still skidding into the sliding doors, knocking them from their hinges. Somewhere inside a maid cried out and ran away, her feet tapping wildly over the floor.

"Control yourself." Sesshomaru ordered her again. His eyes were alight from within and narrowed dangerously. He lifted his hand and flexed his clawed fingers. The tips burned faintly green. "I could kill you easily. Do not test me."

Ginrei was already half on her feet, crouched, readied for battle. She moved away from the screen doors, skirting them. "Monster." She spat, adopting an inaccurate, but recognizable fighting stance. Her rich robes, gifts from Sesshomaru, were odd battlements, like pink ribbons tied to a sword. Her silver hair was long, not pinned up. It had been thrown into wild positions by her trip across the floor moments ago. What the maids had spent great time and effort into combing down into perfect neatness was untamed and unruly now.

Her scent was powerful to Sesshomaru, more than it had ever been since he'd known her. Whether that was because of their battle, or because she had spent sufficient time to recover after the catastrophe of losing her family was impossible to say. She was aggressive now and strong, showing her true inuyoukai colors. Deep within him, Sesshomaru felt a growing reaction to her behavior, a desire to assert dominance. Their relationship had changed and come to a head—and just at the wrong time.

"I do not wish to fight you." he offered stiffly.

It wasn't good enough.

Ginrei snarled and lunged at him again, claws at the ready. Sesshomaru snatched her left hand with his right and ducked the other that she swung at him deftly. Knocking his hip into her, Sesshomaru pushed Ginrei backward. She fell but did not cry out with pain or with surprise. She was not yet defeated.

The blow knocked her to the edge of the balcony and beyond. She stumbled, reaching for something to steady herself, but Sesshomaru was there first, grabbing her up from the brink. With his single arm he pinned her to his chest and backed away from the balcony. He used one foot to force the sliding doors open and pushed his way into the bedroom that Ginrei used as her sleeping chambers. The inuyoukai girl struggled with him, kicking and screaming the whole way.

Inside the room Sesshomaru tossed her onto the futon, letting it trip her and then catch and soften her fall. "Stop." He commanded, though the single word came out as a growl.

Ginrei stared up at him, stiff and prepared to spring again. Her robes were askew, revealing one pale-skinned shoulder. Her hair was a mess but her cheeks were bright with the increased blood flow and stimulation of the fight. Animal ferocity had replaced the trained, demure nature she had been taught to observe. Without answering him verbally she lunged once more, her lips were drawn back in a fierce snarl. This time she did not throw herself at him; she shot one leg out and knocked his feet out from under him.

Sesshomaru partially evaded the blow, sidestepping it, but his balance was disrupted enough that he allowed gravity to take him and turned the fall into a strike of his own. He slashed at Ginrei and moved to use his weight to pin her. His claws found home on her exposed shoulder, drawing blood.

The metallic tang in the air heightened Sesshomaru's instincts, increased his need for violence. But as he struggled to gain control of Ginrei, she changed tactics, trying to escape now rather than instigating a fight. She pushed on him using her fists and her feet, slashed at his hand, at his face, trying to drive him off. A few of her blows drew blood, leaving gouges and scratches. The frenzy increased.

A sane Sesshomaru would've noticed the way speech had disappeared, the way it had begun to degrade into animal growls. He might've noticed the spike in their scents. Likely he could've predicted where the animalistic struggle would end and prevented it, but the Sesshomaru in the middle of the battle was unable to do so. He knew only the scents of blood in the air, the instinct for power and dominance over an unruly female. He saw and felt nothing but her movements. He thought only about where her claws and her body would be in the next few moments and how he could control that outcome.

At long last Sesshomaru gained the upper hand. Catching both Ginrei's wrists in his one palm, he pressed his full weight into her, forcing everything but her legs into stillness. Ginrei made deep grunts and tiny growls, but she also whimpered, a sign that she was giving in and losing. Her heartbeat pounded powerfully just below Sesshomaru's own, frantic and wild. Her breath rushed in and out, heaving. Her legs continued to move, but it was a feeble struggle, Sesshomaru's weight was too much.

As the stillness descended, Sesshomaru made the final move. In the wrestling match between two demons the victor in Sesshomaru's position could easily tear his opponent's throat out. Sesshomaru moved his head, as if to do exactly that. He took her throat between his teeth and bit down—but drew no blood. Ginrei whimpered and her body fell slack, relaxing underneath him, but her breathing had not slowed, her heartbeat continued to pound.

Sesshomaru released his grip on her neck only to switch positions, biting the nearest shoulder instead. Ginrei responded then, lifting her head and snatching hold of his ear firmly. He inhaled sharply, pulling away, caught off guard. For a split second he saw her silver eyes, red in the center, wild—and then she was moving again, struggling against him.

Her teeth found his neck and latched on. She fought his hold on her wrists, digging her claws into the flesh of his palm until she drew fresh blood. The scent of his blood sent her growling hungrily. Her mind had switched off, her body had taken over. Her husband was a monster, but her body knew only his rich scent, the strength she could smell in his blood, the exhilaration of fighting with him physically. Ginrei released his neck and attacked his collarbone.

Instinct combined with arousal, and as Ginrei's hands finally escaped his grip, Sesshomaru fought her. He caught her wrists again and pinned them above her head. A slight shift of his weight gave Ginrei the chance to roll him off balance if she wanted to get away, but also allowed him a greater range of movement. He took advantage of that and buried his nose in the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent. He tasted the inside of her ear, making her squirm, and bit her exposed shoulder just hard enough to draw out a little blood.

He growled, enjoying her scent, her taste in a purely wild, lustful way. She was healthy and mature, coming into her prime. Sesshomaru released her hands and turned his attention to her robes. They were torn and stained with a few spots of blood here and there, but he barely noticed as he pulled on them with the clumsiness of desperation. Ginrei only complicated his struggle as she reached for him with her freed hands, pulling on his robes as well to expose his broad, muscled chest. She attacked the fresh skin with her mouth, not kissing but biting. She was sexually inexperienced, but drawn by powerful instincts to smell, touch, and taste him.

Sesshomaru had instincts of his own to follow. Propelled onward, he pulled her against him into a sitting position and then pushed her into a wall for support. The walls were screened, delicate and thin. When the couple impacted the screens shuddered slightly but held. Ginrei's robe had loosened, exposing her down to almost her belly button. Sesshomaru tackled everything, quickly losing control.

This was not the intimacy he shared with Rin. It was a carnal attack driven by raging, out of control instincts. In spite of their emotional distance, physically they were both drawn intensely to one another by their sexual instincts.

Ginrei clung to his shoulders, her claws biting into his skin. Sesshomaru pawed at the last of her robes and under robes, at last exposing her hips...

A voice carried through the hall, amphibian feet pattered along the floorboards. "Lord Sesshomaru! Lord Sesshomaru!" the footsteps drew nearer and nearer to the doorway but neither Ginrei or Sesshomaru were capable of paying any attention to those sounds.

"Oh, please forgive me, Lord Sesshomaru! The servants only just told me you'd arrived!" Jaken was panting after ascending the stairs. He crossed through the halls, peeking into the open sliding doors wherever he could, searching. The maids and Tsukiyume had told him there was some trouble upstairs. None of them wished to be caught in the middle trying to diffuse it, but Jaken was rather fearless when it came to serving his master. He took the task with little hesitation and was now looking through the rooms, expecting to find his very angry master and a brow-beaten Ginrei at his feet.

He stumbled onto the screen doors that led to the balcony. They were knocked out of their tracks, one was slightly cracked. He made small sounds of alarm and fear in his throat, whimpering, and then moved toward the last room in the hall where Ginrei slept. His toady ears were beginning to pick up the sounds of heavy, fast breathing. "Lord Sesshomaru?"

In their fight Sesshomaru had neglected to close the screen door, it was open. Jaken paused before moving forward, aware that he was likely about to make a mistake. His eyes told him it was safe to enter; the door was open after all. His ears and nose told him other wise. He called again; his voice shook querulously, "Lord Sesshomaru…?"

Jaken bumbled forward the final few steps and peeked into the room and at once gave a squawking scream. He fell prostrate at once, covering his eyes. "I'm _so sorry,_ Lord Sesshomaru!" he whimpered, expecting to be torn to pieces. "Those foolish maids sent me up here because they were certain you would kill Lady Ginrei! I didn't know…!"

Jaken's repeated talking and his appearance in the hallway outside the room, jarred Ginrei first out of her sexual trance. Like a caged animal she clawed at Sesshomaru anew, pushing him away from her. He resisted her first attempts, but her struggling broke his own trance soon enough. Ginrei clutched at her robes and fell to the floor, hiding her face and shaking. Sesshomaru recovered more slowly, blinking as if dazed or dizzy, and then, as he registered Jaken's voice pleading, he dismissed the toad without turning around to see him.

"Leave."

"Yes Lord Sesshomaru! Right away, lord!" the toad slunk away on his hands and knees, keeping his face pointed downward. As soon as he was away from the door he hurried away, running down the hall and for the stairs.

When they were alone, Sesshomaru strode forward and slid the door shut forcefully. He didn't turn back to Ginrei when it was closed; he stayed in front of it, staring blankly into the wall, deep within his thoughts. Shame came first, then frustration. Shame for losing control. Shame for the betrayal it constituted against Rin. Frustration because he could still feel the animal within, unsatisfied and longing to complete the sexual act. This in itself brought more shame because of the continued desire.

Gradually he became aware of the gentle sound of Ginrei crying. The scent of her tears came only slowly through the thick musk of arousal, sweat, and blood from their activities before. Shame mixed with guilt, building until at last he found the courage to turn and face her. She was huddled where she'd fallen; holding her torn robes around her, her face was pressed into the hardwood flooring. For a moment, viewing the scene with a now-sober mind, Sesshomaru wondered if he had been the aggressor, if he had lost complete control and tried to force himself on her. But fear had a distinct stink to it and it was not present in the room.

He fought himself, searching for words. The only thing that came was: "Stop crying." The words were gentle but detached.

This of course brought no answer, so Sesshomaru tried something different. "You have done nothing wrong, Ginrei."

The tears continued, unabated. Sesshomaru moved forward slowly, with great restraint, watching Ginrei to make certain that she wasn't frightened by his approach. He knelt near her side and reached tentatively out to stroke her silver hair. "Stop crying." When she didn't flinch from his presence or his words, he added, "It is nothing."

A minute passed and Ginrei's tears and shaking shoulders subsided. Her breathing evened out, but she didn't raise her head or dare looking at him. She took some comfort in his gentle touch, in the fact that he had stayed in the room with her rather than leaving as quickly as he could. Like Sesshomaru, she dealt with shame, but unlike him the entire experience was new, nearly overwhelming, especially since it hadn't been consciously voluntary. The power of the instincts within her was a shock that she couldn't easily overcome.

And then, quiet but steady, she heard Sesshomaru say, "I am…sorry."

She shook her head, "It was my fault."

He rose to his feet slowly. "Let us forget it." his footsteps receded toward the door. After sliding it open he paused and asked, "You will recover?"

She peeked at him from the floor and nodded. "Yes."

"Good." He stepped out of the room and slid the door shut behind him.

* * *

When her monthly bleeding did not come on time, Rin thought nothing of it. This was a reaction she'd taught herself because it happened a lot. A week and sometimes two might pass before she bled, but this had become commonplace and meant nothing to Rin. That was why, when it did not come, Rin made no mention of it to Sesshomaru and didn't stop him from leaving. She mentioned nothing of it to anyone, and even forbade herself from thinking about it.

It was only when two weeks had passed with nothing and the nausea set in that Rin could no longer go on thinking it was merely late. Part of her feared this, another rejoiced. She delayed even after the stomach sickness set in. Jijo and the other maids offered her calming teas but she turned them away, seeming instead to embrace the sickness.

By the third day, Jijo confronted her.

As Rin lied drowsily in her bed, buried miserably beneath her covers, Jijo knelt at her bedside and left extra pots in case Rin should—and inevitably would—feel sick again. The old woman took in the colorless pallor of the young woman and shook her head. "Lady Rin."

Her voice, old and croaking as it was, woke Rin. She sighed and stretched slightly, trying to smile. "Hello Jijo."

"Your lips say happiness, Lady Rin, but your eyes say misery." She gestured at the pots that served as bedpans, which had been frequently needed in the last few days as places for Rin to vomit. "Three days! I am no fool, this is no ordinary illness."

Rin sighed again and covered her face weakly with one hand. She fought nausea even as Jijo spoke of it. "No, I don't think it is either."

"And where is that lord when Lady Rin needs him?" Jijo demanded, huffing irritably. "You would not be so miserable if he were here, methinks."

"Lord Sesshomaru has other duties, Jijo." Rin scowled, at once defending her mate, "He…in the past he spent so much time at my side only to…" she swallowed thickly, suddenly blinking back tears. "He used to be able to tell me when I was about to lose one." She choked on her last few words, the pain still seemingly fresh and rushing back. It was true. Sesshomaru had doted on her especially in the beginning, but after a few incidents when he actually _scented_ the child being flushed from her body, he had backed off drastically.

"Shh, shh." Jijo hushed her, stepping forward and weaving her way through the pots at Rin's bedside. She stroked Rin's hair, running her fingers through it as a mother might. "There, there. It will be all right, honey."

A few deep breaths later and Rin had regained her composure, but already she was beginning to fall asleep. Fatigue plagued her more heavily when a baby was going to stay with her for a time. At least, that was Rin's theory. The babies that she lost within a month she hardly counted as miscarriages anymore. Usually she hardly noticed being pregnant at all. It was with the babies that broke her heart that she suffered most, the babies that survived into three months, once into four months.

The four month baby had been the worst. The bleeding terrible, the pain severe. For a time Rin wondered if that baby would drag her into death as well. She remembered it as if she'd known the child, writing out a name for it and mourning it when she worshipped. She called it Aishou, _sorrow._

"Surely Lady Rin should summon her lord?" Jijo asked politely, still stroking through Rin's hair. "Lady Rin should not suffer his child alone."

Slowly, Rin nodded. "Help me get up, and call Daken…"

Jijo pulled her from the bed, fetched a robe and combed Rin's hair out. It was not ornate and Jijo left Rin's hair free flowing and un-styled. She accompanied Rin into a reception room across the hall and then brought Daken to her. The grizzled inuyoukai was smirking, as was his usual expression for everything, when he saw Rin that morning.

"Lady Rin." He bowed cordially. "What would you desire of me this fine morning?" but when he looked Rin in the eye she could already see his mischief. He had the dog demon's nose, even if his had aged somewhat. He could smell her new pregnancy; he didn't need to be told.

"I need you to find Lord Sesshomaru and request that he returns to me swiftly."

"Ah certainly, Lady Rin. What should I tell his lordship if he tries to decline? Is the matter urgent?" these questions were all formalities because he already knew by scent what the problem was. Daken took great pleasure in probing; she could see it in his eyes.

Rin's jaw tightened. "Merely ask for him to return. The matter is not urgent."

Daken's mirth seemed to evaporate for a moment, but he regained it quickly and bowed. "My lady." He turned on his heel and vanished out the door.

Jijo was sitting in the corner of the room, behind Rin. She cleared her throat cautiously, "Will he come, Lady Rin?"

"He will."

* * *

_Ah, I had to publish this because it was written, because I felt like it. I know though, all of you will hate me now. Bring it my readers, bring it. (well, don't be too mean...)_


	10. Shimofuri's Rebellion

Long Author's Note!

I've had questions about whether this is a Sess/Rin fic still. Yes, it is. BUT it isn't a perfect Sess/Rin as I'm sure you've figured out. I'll be frank with you all: Sesshomaru needs heirs and with invitro fertilization 500 years shy of his time, he IS going to sleep with Ginrei. I know for many of you that's horrible news.

As usual I admire and adore all of you because, unlike Sueric who's always complaining about being flamed (sometimes I wonder if it's really true considering I am blocked from submitting reviews and I am pretty positive that nothing I've said constituted "flaming.") I have not received reviews that discourage or intimidate me. Occasionally I receive one that pokes me a little with doubt, or one that is highly charged with emotion at my writing/storyline. I don't consider these "flaming." So as a result I must say I'm impressed with the level of maturity that my reviewers typically give me. Even with that dependable past history, I'm a little wary of this current story and where my writing has gone with it.

Part of my wariness is because this story is, and this baffles me, very popular. I don't know if this trend will continue, and I'm certainly not complaining, but a number of the reviews express concern and people have told me "If this is a Ginrei/Sess thing count me out…" I hate losing readers, but I can't really change my plans or I wouldn't be true to everyone else that's here for a good story, as evil as it is.

So what is Sess/Ginrei for those of you that are outraged/frustrated? Is it sex? Is it emotion? Is it Sesshomaru's inability to accept Rin's children as heirs?

I define this story as Sess/Rin, but some of you might disagree. It's up to you to decide what up there counts and doesn't count and whether I'm crossing YOUR line. I will assure you all that Sesshomaru will sleep with Ginrei, it's a must. He'll have some emotional entanglement—but next to nothing, which as far as Sesshomaru goes means zilch. And as far as Rin goes I'll answer this question that has also been asked quite a bit: Rin will NOT be a pushover. I have not characterized her that way in my other stories; it would be poorly written on my part to change my tune now. I have grand, ambitious plans for her.

With those thoughts aside, I have mostly decided on writing a shorter plot scheme. This hurts Rin less and shortens the story some, moving it along so that we can see Rin's reaction and Sesshomaru's turn to suffer.

As a result my next chapter, which I wanted to post today but looked at it and cringed thinking of the reaction I'd get, feels speedy to me. The new-ish conflict I added is fine, but I continued the events of last chapter into the this one, taking advantage of it (the sex). I was truly uncertain of last chapter, but as most of you accepted it, I went ahead writing this one as my gut instructed. I was going to publish it and grit my teeth, cross my fingers, but I decided to warn readers first, and to answer a few questions to those of you who are wondering but not reviewing to ask me personally.

After this update the following chapter will be gentler, I promise you. I'm going to write an interlude of the Inuyasha household for catching up and a little comedic relief.

Disclaimer: Nope, not me.

* * *

Last Chap: Rin has realized she's pregnant and reconnected with an old maid/servant Jijo. She asked Daken to bring Sesshomaru back to her on Jijo's urging. Ginrei challenged Sesshomaru physically and things got out of hand. Jaken interrupted them at the last moment.

Note: for some of you that didn't read _With Our Arms Wide Open_ there is some political intrigue in this chapter that you may not understand, so I'll outline and refresh you all. The **Isei province** belongs to Sesshomaru out of war. Previously it belonged to _Nishiyori_ of the _Middle Lands_. There are several other rulers of the Middle Lands, but chief among them is _Shimofuri_, Tsukiyume's older half brother. _Sasugainu_ is their uncle, younger brother of **Lady Taikokajin** who ruled the Middle Lands before Shimofuri, she was his mother. Shimofuri would've lost his power to Ginrei's family (Nishiyori and her father Seiyo) if Sesshomaru hadn't offered his money, troops, and supplies.

* * *

**Shimofuri's Rebellion**

"I think you've gone crazy, Nephew." Sasugainu murmured, scowling at the younger lord. "No one can attack Sesshomaru. Need I remind you that it was Sesshomaru's troops and supplies that let _you_ keep the Middle Lands?"

The two inuyoukai lords sat in a small room, undecorated, unadorned. The maids and guards had been dismissed and both dog demons had their ears attuned to any sudden noises. They were nervous, tense. Their conversation was a dangerous one, if overheard they could be exposed and ruined. Their lives would be forfeit. They had sworn allegiance to Lord Sesshomaru in the Western Lands, but now the younger of the two, Lord Shimofuri, was proposing something that could turn Sesshomaru against them.

"Tsukiyume has written to me, by his permission I assume, and informed me that he has housed her in the Isei province with the bitch we provided him—_his wife."_ Shimofuri's voice had taken on a noticeable tone of disgust. "She has told me that he will allow her to return to me in a year's time." The young dog demon's posture stiffened, his face soured, "I find this unacceptable."

"Tough." Sasugainu grunted. "We're stuck you know, but it's not a bad place to be stuck. Sesshomaru has given us power—actually given _you_ power. Your heirs will rule the Middle Lands. Let him hold your sister a year, if she is unharmed can it truly be bad?"

"He is out of control." Shimofuri's spine was still rigid. In the months since he had ascended to power, and through the months of civil war within his lands, he had become harder and matured. He was a handsome inuyoukai with blue-gray eyes and blue-black hair. His uncle was fair in comparison, which was typical of their side of the clan. Sasugainu had silver-white hair and pale blue eyes. His sister before him, the infamous Lady Taikokajin, had been a full-fledged albino with white hair and pink eyes. Shimofuri took after his father with darker hair and features.

"What would you do about it? And I'll tell you now—I will have nothing to do with your little rebellion. I want to keep my family and my province intact, even if I'm the last one standing in the Middle Lands."

Shimofuri's eyes narrowed on Sasugainu carefully. "I have employed several wolf youkai as spies. I have information about his activities, his whereabouts. We are not trapped, Uncle."

"Everyone is spying on each other. What difference do a few wolf youkai make?" Sasugainu shook his head, smiling without mirth. "You are inexperienced, Shimofuri. Leave Sesshomaru alone, he will rip you to shreds."

"He is in a delicate time, Uncle. We could gain the upper hand." He paused a moment to lean forward, dropping his voice. "Do you recall his mate?"

Sasugainu frowned. "The poor helpless bitch we gave him? That one?"

"No, no." Shimofuri leaned forward conspiratorially. "His _mate. _Lady Rin, the human."

Sasugainu snorted and then actually laughed, short and bark-like. "I had heard that rumor, but it is merely gossip—or worse, it's true and he has taken a human as a toy…"

"She is not a toy, I have met her." Shimofuri scowled, disapprovingly. "He's trained her as if she were an inuyoukai. She met with me in his place once. She speaks with great authority. She is _not his toy."_

"Fine, she is _not_ a toy." Sasugainu rolled his eyes once but straightened with seriousness as he saw his nephew's irritation mounting. "What does she have to do with any of this?"

"My sister has told me that Lady Rin has no knowledge of the bitch we gave Sesshomaru. She believes he is loyal. There is great emotion between them and Lady Rin has been unable to carry his offspring long enough for them to survive."

Sasugainu made a face of sympathy. "My wife suffered a miscarriage several years ago. She has never recovered emotionally." He fell silent, turning his mind away from his personal connection with the news and toward how it would benefit them. "You wish to expose him?"

Shimofuri nodded slowly, meaningfully. "He holds my sister against me—but I know where she is. She is closer to us than she ever has been before, and she is less guarded. We can take her—and then we can take Lady Rin from him as well, in a manner of speaking."

"Bold, Nephew." Sasugainu regarded the younger inuyoukai with a new, almost wary gaze. "You are perhaps as ruthless as Sesshomaru, but how do you propose to do this?"

Shimofuri pinched his lips together then. "I will need your help, Uncle. If not you then I risk sharing it with someone outside our family—the wolf youkai spies, or perhaps Arasoizuki."

Sasugainu snorted loudly. "Arasoizuki would not aid us in the war. He is too busy with his new wife." The inuyoukai they spoke of was another ruler of the Middle Lands, in control of the Itou province within the Middle Lands.

"Then you agree to help me?"

Sasuginu withdrew, sitting further back on his haunches. His face took on a deep, pensive look. "Risk enraging Lord Sesshomaru of the Western Lands? It sounds like a suicide mission, Nephew. I cannot make such a decision lightly."

Shimofuri's hands clenched into fists in his lap. "You would allow that tyrant to continue cowing us into his service? I will need your support—and Tsukiyume will recognize you and leave with you if I send you to get her. I can't be in two places at once."

"What do you mean?"

Shimofuri drew in a deep breath. "I will travel in person to reveal the truth to Lady Rin. My spies have learned where he is keeping her now. I will bring Tsukiyume's letters to prove my words. She speaks often of Sesshomaru's secret wife. Lady Rin will recognize my sister's handwriting and know that I am not lying to her."

"I will not leave my scent for Sesshomaru to pick up." Sasugainu frowned, troubled, "But I will aid you in every other way that I can, Nephew."

* * *

Sesshomaru did not sleep that night. There was no true reason why he needed to sleep; it was more out of habit. Living beside Rin had molded his patterns, making him at least pretend to sleep at night because she needed it. Sleep was necessary for him after an injury, after stress, and sometimes just to refresh his mind and body. He would not die, like humans would, if he didn't sleep regularly, but it was always advisable to sleep when the chance arose.

He sat awake for several hours in the evening, alone within the room across the hall from Ginrei's. He knew she was inside her own room, silent but awake. His hearing was acute enough that, if he wished, he could tune into the sounds of her breathing and heartbeat. They were too fast to be patterns of sleep, so he understood that she was awake as well. Normally she slept as often as possible, until he had forced her to take lessons during the day. She was recovering emotionally from the trauma of losing her family, which made sleep actually essential to her. Now she stayed awake, troubled no doubt by him.

Tsukiyume, a hanyou, actually needed sleep. Sesshomaru was certain that she slept deeply in one of the rooms downstairs. He and Ginrei had not emerged from their respective rooms all day since their "fight." He had not eaten, nor spoken to anyone, and no one had come to visit or bother him. A few maids had come around to badger Ginrei about eating. Apparently she had refused food in the beginning of her stay. Sesshomaru could've guessed that from how thin she was underneath her robes…

Desire still pervaded his thoughts, his mood. He thought of leaving without word often, of hurrying back to Jouka and joining physically with Rin, and then dismissed the idea time and time again. His need was instinctual, harsh. It was less a desire and more a _need_, a compulsion, a forceful drive. He worried about being unable to control himself and harming her, perhaps seriously. An inuyoukai "love bite" in human terms might disfigure and scar. It also might draw a _lot_ more blood in a human than an inuyoukai. His desire, his compulsion, was for blood.

Aside from his own instincts, there was another major concern: Rin's health. She was pregnant, he was almost certain of it. If this child took a secure root within her Sesshomaru could jolt it right out of her. The last thing he wanted to do was _cause_ her to miscarry. Also, since her miscarriages, Rin shied away from intimacy with him while she was pregnant. Her months of pregnancy were times of celibacy for him when both of them tiptoed around the other, worrying only about the scrap of life trying to sprout within her.

A windstorm blew up out of the north. It rattled the screens on Sesshomaru's windows; it forced freezing air into the cracks, cooling the room. Sesshomaru enjoyed the dip in temperature; it eased his tension, his anxiety—but not his guilt. As the night wore on and the storm's fury increased, Sesshomaru left his room and headed for the balcony.

As he passed Ginrei's room he heard her sit up, coming to attention inside. Her scent lingered outside the room, making him pause as it hit him. Pungent, rich, and…fertile.

He exhaled fiercely, trying to banish the scent, trying to push away its effect on him. It was with great effort that he made his way toward the balcony, into the cold, rather than into the warmth of her room.

Outside the wind howled bitterly. It twisted the snow, carving snow banks into eerie, beautiful structures with scalloped edges. Sesshomaru's night vision was excellent. He watched the snow devils writhing in the air and then vanishing, like wraiths or ghosts.

He thought of Rin visiting the small shrine inside his castle after her last big miscarriage. She'd prepared a tablet with a name that she'd inscribed herself. She left offerings to the shrine and prayed to the _kami_ spirits that were responsible for the souls of unborn children. She mourned in both religions, Buddhism and Shinto. She prayed things that Sesshomaru found silly but never said so: that the souls of her lost children would not disrupt the new ones conceived within her. That they would be reborn to happy, healthy families and be given long lives and that perhaps she could know of them in her dreams. She prayed for a living baby that she could hold in her arms, nurse at her breast…

Sesshomaru didn't believe that their many, many miscarried, unborn babies would be reborn. They were hanyou; they were uncertain creatures, already not-meant-to-be. In the spirit world they likely held no power at all. He would've believed that reincarnation was a myth, impossible, if not for his half-brother's involvement with the humans Kagome and Kikyo. Perhaps, he believed, human souls reincarnated, and perhaps youkai might as well. But hanyou could not. They did not belong.

He loved Rin, adored her, respected her, but the thought of their offspring—hanyou babies—intimidated him. Sesshomaru could not overcome his suspicion, his dislike. Inuyasha had, in the circumstances of his conception and his birth, killed the great Inutaisho. Sesshomaru had been young, foolhardy at the time of his father's death. Leadership came naturally to him, as did power, but he lived in Inutaisho's shadow. Inutaisho had died too soon, and for a _hanyou_ son, for a _mortal woman._ It left Sesshomaru with a bad taste in his mouth. He felt betrayed, robbed. His father had left him too soon, left him to rule over the Western Lands when he was too young.

He blamed Inuyasha for that, but more than that, he blamed hanyou kind. Hanyou seemed to come with a curse on their heads. Inuyasha had killed Inutaisho. Tsukiyume had driven her mother, Lady Taikokajin, mad with maternal worry. Now she was a thorn in Shimofuri's side because he loved and adored her so. If he could overcome his attachment then Sesshomaru would have little power over the young ruler. Inuyasha was sometimes prone to transformations that left him powerless or bloodthirsty so that he would kill his own children or mate if he could get a hold of them. Tsukiyume had not demonstrated the same curse, but Sesshomaru suspected it was there.

Although he could never admit it, Sesshomaru feared his own offspring—feared and longed for them at once. It was a thick, complex emotion. Even the thought of his heirs through Ginrei made him tense. He was the correct age to begin producing offspring. By clan standards he was even a little old. Inutaisho had been about the same age when the clan married him to Sesshomaru's mother.

A sound, the floorboards squeaking, drew Sesshomaru out of his thoughts. He lifted his head, feeling the wind rush through his hair at a different angle with the movement, and almost asked who was there, except that a rush of heat within him told him ahead of time. The wind snatched her scent away but he could sense her presence anyway, keenly. He shifted uncomfortably and faced the wind again.

"What are you doing, Ginrei?" he was troubled, disturbed by the roughness of his voice. It was not anger really, that roughened it…

She didn't answer, and the floorboards remained silent. She was apparently motionless, still out of fear or uncertainty or any other amount of emotion.

The moment dragged on with the wind howling in Sesshomaru's ears, through his hair. He turned and stared at the closed screen doors that led inside, narrowing his eyes. It was the middle of the night, no one else was likely to be awake. Certainly not the humans with their poor eyesight and their nightly need for sleep. This moment was truly the most private opportunity they had.

Sesshomaru pushed thoughts of Ginrei out of his mind, though he could still feel his body trying to react, his heart rate speeding, his breathing picking up. The instinct rose again, demanding that he approach her, test her readiness, mate if at all possible. His single hand clenched up into a fist with frustration, desperation.

"Leave me, Ginrei." He growled, and then closed his eyes at the sound of his voice, inwardly hating it though outwardly he showed little sign of his emotion. Words were deteriorating again, his composure was growing harder to maintain.

The screen door slid open, wide. The wind rattled it and whooshed past it. Ginrei fell into a bow on the other side of it. Her hair was wild and unrestrained, already flowing in the wind. "I cannot sleep, Lord Sesshomaru."

That much was obvious. "Leave me." He ordered again, still growling coldly.

"You are leaving in the morning, are you not?" she asked with her head still ducked low in a bow. When he didn't offer her an answer immediately she cleared her throat nervously and spoke once more, "Do you recall the deal you made with me?"

He considered her question for a moment, searching his memory. Thought was hard; his brain was clouded by need, distracted by his body's reactions. "Deal?"

"Your son for the Isei."

Her voice was barely discernible even to his ears from the howl of the wind. Yet when he put the scattered words he heard together and understood, the memory smacked into him forcefully. He had bribed her, offering her power if she gave him the heir he needed. For a time Sesshomaru stared at his bowing wife and was struck with admiration. Their offspring would be dangerous indeed with both parents motivated by the idea of power. Despite being a sheltered female, Ginrei was prepared to grab hold of power when it was offered to her.

"Yes, I recall it."

She lifted her head from the floor now, blinking against the ferocity of the wind. "Would Lord Sesshomaru honor it?"

Sesshomaru fought the desire to frown at her and instead maintained a calm, uncaring exterior. "The agreement was official—of course." They had drunk sake over it; he'd had papers drawn up detailing the exchange after she'd accepted. Sesshomaru was not a liar, especially not when it was in writing. And besides, if Ginrei could be made an ally it would not truly be losing the Isei…

Ginrei's eyes searched his, but in her mouth Sesshomaru could see desire. The slight separation of her lips, the increase in breathing and heart rate.

Abruptly, Ginrei scooted backward on her knees and turned away from him. Sesshomaru blinked and strained his ears against the wind, listening to her progress. He noted with annoyance that she had not closed the door to the balcony behind her. She passed through the hallway and to the entrance to the room that functioned as his sleeping chamber. There she halted, hesitating. Sesshomaru heard her slide the screen door open with a deliberate, careful slowness.

Sesshomaru's heart pounded, though he struggled to quiet it. Instinctual anger rose within him. She had left without excusing herself, she had the gall to leave and then walk into _his_ room. It was effectively like trespassing. She was taunting him.

He turned back to the wind, trying one last time to force his body back from the brink to sanity. Ginrei was fertile; she was initiating something she could not undo because of the pressure of instinct. Of course this argument with himself was cast at least partially into doubt because she had knowingly come to him and reminded him of the deal they'd struck, hoping to ensure herself some power for her cooperation.

Rin's image came to him. Her brown eyes full of warmth and love. The suffering she went through. He recalled the name she had given to the child she mourned in the temples: _Aishou, sorrow._ There would be even greater sorrow in her life if she could see him as he was now…

This guilt was enough to keep him sitting where he was, with the winter wind howling inside his ears—but only for an instant longer. In his room, Ginrei shut the screen door forcefully, rattling it jarringly and bringing Sesshomaru sharply out of his thoughts. She had not shut the balcony screen door, but she had closeted herself away inside _his_ room…

It was time to teach her a lesson.

He rose to his feet and moved inside, shutting the screen door behind him with twice as much force as Ginrei had used on the door to his room. Moving with the speed of the inuyoukai, a furious blur of motion, Sesshomaru snatched open the door to his room and entered.

Ginrei was not in the center, as he'd expected, she'd waited beside the screen door, and as he came through, she slammed it shut behind him. Sesshomaru startled, lashing out at her. His claws glanced over her shoulder and her arm, tearing into the robe she was wearing. The faint scent of her blood entered the air. Ginrei attacked him just after he'd slashed her, ripping at his face, his shoulders, his stomach. Her lunge knocked him off balance. They stumbled into one another and fell onto the floor.

Ginrei gained the upper hand, pinning him facedown on the floor. She dug her claws into his shoulders, drawing out his blood to meet her own from seconds earlier. He snarled with the pain and used the advantage of weight, rolling and trapping her beneath him. A few slashes with his claws and her robes fell apart, slipping away in tatters. His own were already falling off from Ginrei's earlier barrage of slashing. Her flesh was scalding to him, almost electric. Like him she'd spent hours suffering from unspent sexual need, she rushed now with violent eagerness that easily rivaled his own.

As their bodies merged he caught snatches of her eyes. In the lightless room they looked dark; he could almost mistake them for a brown. _Almost_, but then Ginrei would scratch her inuyoukai claws over him, drawing the rich stink of blood, and Sesshomaru was drawn back to reality…

* * *

In the evening the next day Daken arrived, searching for Sesshomaru. He was greeted first by the human servants, then by Jaken and Tsukiyume. The toad was the first to speak, almost the moment he spotted him.

"You! Are you looking for Lord Sesshomaru?"

"Yes—I have a message for him." Daken glanced between Tsukiyume, who appeared nervous and tense, and the toad who was harried. Jaken walked with a wobblier hobble than usual, telling Daken that he was uncomfortable somehow.

"He isn't here." Jaken harrumphed. "He left at dawn—without telling any of us!"

"Really?" Daken felt the muscles in his face twitch. He was smirking, as he always did, but the twitch was a sign of his discomfort, his frustration. "I must find him. Lady Rin sent me to summon him."

"I'm sure he would've returned to her." Tsukiyume told him, quietly. "Where else would he go?"

"With Lord Sesshomaru it's anyone's guess." Daken mumbled. He saw Jaken's eyes bug out at this with shock at the disrespect and started to splutter; trying to scold the old inuyoukai for his words, but Daken turned his back on them. "Good day to you both."

"Good day…" Tsukiyume answered him, hesitantly. Her ears were lying flat on her head, white dog ears against her dark black hair. While Jaken huffed and puffed about Daken's rudeness, she was preoccupied, wondering about Rin. Did she know? Had Sesshomaru told her? How was she…?

* * *

Endnote: Because I'm generous and in a writing mood, I'll provide you with a sample of the humorous bit of next chapter:

_Kagome called this activity "Hide and Go Seek." Inuyasha called it a survival lesson. One day he planned on teaching their daughter the same skills, though Kagome always protested. **"There are too many ticks, Inuyasha! You're going to give them Lyme Disease!" **_

_Whatever that was. Once, he'd told her that she shouldn't worry about it—he'd taught Koinu to eat the ticks. **That** hadn't gone over very well either. _


	11. Uncle Sesshomaru

A/N: This is a LONG chapter. Just for the heck of it, and cuz I got carried away, I love Miroku, Sango, Inuyasha, and Kagome's children and developing their characters. Enjoy!

Disc: Nope, not a chance for me…

* * *

Last Chap: Rin realized she was pregnant and sent for Sesshomaru using the messenger Daken. Sesshomaru and Ginrei consummated their marriage out of rage, lust, and frustration. Sesshomaru left before dawn the following day. Daken completely missed him with Rin's sending. Rin met her old maid/caretaker, Jijo.

Note: for those of you unfamiliar with my storyline, years (five years in _So Much For..._ and _With Our Arms Wide Open_ to nearly a decade here in _Runaway_) have passed since the Shard hunters defeated Naraku and took care of the Sacred Jewel. Sango and Miroku were married almost immediately and in my previous story (which is set probably a year or two in the past from the current events happening with Sess/Rin/Ginrei) had three children: Kohimu, Tisoki (their sons), and Kasai, but a fourth was on the way. Inuyasha and Kagome settled down, though Kagome still visits her family frequently, but their children came more slowly because hanyou are hybrids, generally infertile. However, they have managed to have 2 children, son Koinu and daughter Akisame.

* * *

**Uncle Sesshomaru**

The morning was cloudy and overcast. A few lazy snowflakes were falling out of the sky. They took their time because there was no wind.

Inuyasha was perched in the branches of his favorite tree: a gnarled old giant on the backside of his land. When the snowflakes landed on him they melted swiftly, but they were gradually accumulating on the tree branches around him, giving the old tree a distinctly frosted look. He searched over the snowy landscape that was his estate with his golden eyes. He appeared hawk-like, searching for prey…

Sounds reached him from the house, some hundred feet away across a long expanse of grass that Inuyasha insisted they let grow wild and untrimmed in the summer time. Kagome complained—she was good at that—that she couldn't walk through it without coming out of it itchy all over, and covered with a tick or two. Inuyasha ignored her because the "backyard" as she liked to call it, was _his domain._ She could turn the front into a beautiful garden with bushes and cherry trees and ponds filled with colorful koi if she wanted, but the "backyard" was _his_ playground.

Where else could he teach his son how to survive?

Kagome called this activity "Hide and Go Seek." Inuyasha called it a survival lesson. One day he planned on teaching their daughter the same skills, though Kagome always protested. _"There are too many ticks, Inuyasha! You're going to give them Lyme Disease!"_

Whatever that was. Once, he'd told her that she shouldn't worry about it—he'd taught Koinu to eat the ticks. _That_ hadn't gone over very well either.

But this was wintertime. Snow covered the tick-infested grass now, leaving his young son Koinu fewer places to hide. Even so Inuyasha felt rising pride—Koinu had learned the tricks of the wind. Inuyasha could not see or scent his son. In nearly two years of playing this "game" Koinu had at last begun to grasp it and excel.

More noise made him lose his concentration on the house for a moment. Laughter, a baby crying. Inuyasha scowled. Normally he didn't play this game in the wintertime, but today the house overwhelmed him, forcing him outside. The trouble was that Miroku and Sango were visiting, as they often did, but unlike in past visits this one came with a pregnant and very irritable Sango. It was a recurring theme within their family for Sango to throw Miroku out in the earlier months of a pregnancy. This time, however, the grouchiness hadn't set in until they'd already been accepted into the household and this time her irritation had been directed mostly at Inuyasha, not Miroku.

He'd gotten himself in trouble this time by dashing her hopes of having another daughter. With his heightened sense of smell it was easy for Inuyasha to predict the gender of unborn babies by the presence or absence of male hormones emanating from the mother. In Sango's latest pregnancy there were plenty of male hormones and he told her as much when he overheard her desire to have another girl.

_That_ hadn't gone over very well either. It was a running trend for the hanyou.

A smaller sound drew Inuyasha's attention. It was a scratching noise, like claws digging. The tree he was perched in shook slightly, carrying vibrations through the wood. Inuyasha's face transformed into a smirk, his ears steadied, refusing to react to the sounds. It seemed that he'd hesitated too long and Koinu had gotten bored. Now he was trying to turn the tables on his old man.

Inuyasha heard his son grunting with effort, felt the tree shaking. He was still too young—and only a quarter youkai—to leap any distance. So he had to actually scale the tree, jump by jump, and that destroyed almost any chance of stealth. To compensate he was trying to climb the tree as fast as possible, but that just left him clumsy.

Chuckling, Inuyasha leaned forward and peered downward. Five feet down on the tree trunk there was a small clawed hand, clutching at the bark. "Nice try."

Jumping from the tree, Inuyasha crashed into the snow, only to whirl and then leap back into it, but at a lower place, opposite the struggling, fair-haired, dog eared child. Koinu squeaked, clawing at the tree bark. His miniature ears turned backward, his face fell even as it continued to twist with the effort and energy it took him to hold onto the tree.

"Daaaad…" he whimpered, pathetically. He was shivering, Inuyasha could hear his voice twittering, wavering like the wind. "You heard me?"

Koinu was about four years old, though his coordination was that of a much older child. His youkai heritage blessed him with a grace that most of Sango and Miroku's children couldn't compete with. In personality Koinu was similar to both of his parents. He could become angry, aloof, sullen or impatient like his father, but just as easily he could turn around and exhibit his mother's gentleness, affection, caring, concern. One thing he had inherited from both parents was determination. He was doggedly persistent and thoroughly loyal to his family—and family within the youngster's mind extended to Sango and Miroku and their children.

He would never tell his father that he was freezing. Like Kagome he would endure silently to please his father. Inuyasha, as a child in the same instance, would've complained bitterly and then insisted to suffer through the task and finish it. Koinu buried his discomfort in favor of whomever he was trying to please.

Reading past his son's outer façade, Inuyasha sighed, accepting the inevitable. It was time to go back into the house and face the women and, undoubtedly, the screaming babies. "C'mon champ—I think it's time we got back inside."

"B-b-but Daaad…" Koinu whimpered. His little ears drooped pathetically, shivering unconsciously with the cold. "I a-a-almost b-beat you."

"Close, but not close enough." Inuyasha maneuvered around the tree truck and snatched Koinu up in one strong, red-clad arm. He pressed his young son against his chest, sheltering him from the chilled air. Koinu was not proud enough yet—or perhaps he wasn't like his father emotionally—to try and fight Inuyasha's grasp. Instead he embraced it, clutching his father's haori, snuggling into it like a blanket.

Inuyasha crossed the snow-covered length between the tree and his home. There was a small, covered porch, lifted from ground level by three small steps. This served as a place to store shoes, sandals, foot wraps, anything that might track dirt into the home. Inuyasha let Koinu down from his arms and gently swatted his son's backsides. "Take off your _booties."_

"Daaaad…" Koinu whined, frowning. Like Inuyasha he preferred to go without shoes, but the snow bothered him a lot more than it bothered Inuyasha. Kagome fashioned him what she liked to call "booties" for their son, the only shoes he would willingly wear. Inuyasha took advantage of this and teased Koinu about them affectionately.

Koinu fumbled with the straps and ties over his "booties." Inuyasha, meanwhile, used a small pan full of soapy water to wash the dirt, tree bark, and snow from his own feet. They entered the house together, both flattening their ears against the rising scream of infants and toddlers.

* * *

The same snow that Inuyasha had observed from his tree, Rin watched in the gardens at Jouka. Wrapped and bundled up tightly, she ignored Jijo's clucking about how unwise it was for Rin to be outside at all. Jijo herself was shaking more than Rin as she struggled to hold the umbrella high for her young mistress, shielding her from the gentle fall of snowflakes.

"I'll draw my lady a warm bath, and fetch all of the latest literature from the library—"

"I've already read it all, Jijo." Rin muttered, sighing. She turned and snatched the umbrella from the old woman. "If you're cold, go inside. I'll manage."

"I would never!" the old woman gasped, though her body was quaking and wracked with shivers.

"It's okay, Jijo." Rin smiled, "You're cold, I can see it. If I get cold I'll come inside, I promise."

Jijo huffed proudly and tried to stop her shivering with new effort. "You shouldn't be out here, Lady Rin. In your condition…"

Rin fingered the narrow, carved edges of the umbrella's handle. Her emotions made the world spin for a moment; the snow was dazzling white, even against the ugly, gray sky. _Don't think about that…_she repeated to herself. The baby was sure to perish within her, just as all the others had before it.

"Leave me, Jijo. It's what I want." She stuck one hand out beyond the protective circle of the umbrella and waited until a few fat snowflakes landed there, warming against her palm and melting into little teardrops.

"Lord Sesshomaru would skin me alive!" Jijo insisted, and now there was humor within her voice. Rin allowed herself to enjoy that humor. The protection of the inuyoukai, the obsession. It was renowned.

"I wouldn't let him."

Her heart quickened. Rin looked up, squinting through the brightness of the snow. Her human eyes were frail; Jaken and Sesshomaru had told her this many times over. She couldn't see well in the dark, and against the snow detail was muted and swallowed whole. In spite of this, Rin tried anyway. Along the path, through the latest, thin layer of snow, Rin gradually saw movement against the whiteness.

Golden, hawk-like eyes lifted, taking her in.

Rin's heart leapt inside her. The umbrella fell away with a thumping sound into the snow. Jijo gasped and reached for it, startled by Rin's actions. She had just started to scold her when she saw that Rin had disappeared, hurrying down the path.

Sesshomaru was barely visible, but as she drew nearer, Rin saw that he was tired, more worn than she'd seen him in a long time. As she bowed, she thought she saw him look away, as if uninterested or—pained? She dismissed the instinctual interpretation, focusing on the joy erupting inside her. He had returned to her, and even now, already, it was a sure thing he would smell the baby inside her.

"Lord Sesshomaru," she gasped, "This lowly one welcomes you and begs your pardon for asking you to return so soon."

"What are you doing out here?" Sesshomaru asked, sounding almost openly irritated. "You are vulnerable."

"I wanted to see the snow." She insisted, clearing her throat and daring to glance up at him. "It's so beautiful out here." Of course the true beauty was right before her, she thought—and then how unusual it was, to see Sesshomaru in an icy environment. It was as if he'd been made for the cold weather. His hair was so fair it matched the whiteness of the snow falling around them. His kimono was white as well. Snow didn't show up on him, it covered him, masked him. Usually he stood out against all other weather because of his fair hair, his golden eyes.

"Come, Rin. We must go inside." He waited as she rose to her feet, and then they walked together, side by side, back to the warmth of the palace.

* * *

The first thing that greeted them was Kasai, the only daughter of Miroku and Sango. She was only about 9 months older than Koinu, but she was somehow fiercer and roughly the same size—albeit she was far less coordinated. The tiny girl was trying to cuddle Akisame—Koinu's little two year old sister. Akisame was squalling and fighting the other, older girl's grasp on her.

Kasai at once let go of Akisame when she saw "Uncle" Inuyasha and Koinu enter the room. "I'm sorry!" she squeaked, nervously, "I didn't do it!"

Kasai was the very image of Miroku, except that she was in female form. She had his bright, violet eyes, as well as his deep, dark black hair. She also seemed to possess his quick tongue and habit of lying—fortunately she wasn't good at it yet.

Inuyasha growled. "Kasai…" he strode forward and stooped to pick up his screaming daughter.

Kasai scrambled backwards, stumbling. Her violet eyes were wide and terrified. "Uncle Inu!" she stammered, starting to cry, "I didn't mean to!"

Koinu was at his father's side, frowning and mimicking Inuyasha's battle ready stance, arms crossed, a scowl covering his little face. "Why did you hurt Aki?" he demanded. Although his body language said he was angry, his blue eyes were saddened, betrayed. While playing, Koinu considered himself loyal to Kasai. He protected her when her older brothers, Kohimu and Tisoki, tried to keep her out of their games. If they excluded her, Koinu would include her. By harming Akisame, Kasai was tearing his loyalties.

"She was trying to get out!" Kasai responded, shrieking helplessly. Her words were beginning to deteriorate into whimpers and blubbering cries. "Aunt 'Gome told me to watch Aki!"

Inuyasha had silenced his daughter, cuddling her against his chest and stroking her black hair gently. Unlike Koinu, who shared Inuyasha's more prominent inuyoukai features—dog ears, and fair hair—Akisame looked like Kagome except for her eyes which were the honey gold of her father's. She hadn't been born with the trademark white dog ears, much to everyone's surprise. Souta had joked that he might've accused Kagome of cheating, except that Akisame had Inuyasha's eyes from birth. Mrs. Higurashi maintained that Souta's joke was _anything_ but funny and she had a lengthier explanation involving "jeans" and "chrome-mo-zomes." Whatever those were…

"Where's mama, Aki?" he asked her, half-purring. The same claws that had torn apart bloodthirsty demons now traced his daughter's human ears, hidden as they were beneath her thick, and slightly curly, black hair.

She squirmed in his arms and turned to point past where Kasai was still trembling, down the hall. Then she clawed at her father's arms, grunting and growling. She might've looked like Kagome, but Akisame possessed more of Inuyasha's spirit than Koinu—at least as a toddler.

"Okay, okay." Inuyasha knelt and set her down. Akisame at once used his leg as a crutch and pushed herself into an upright, bipedal stance. She glared at Kasai with her narrowed, golden eyes. When her father stepped away, moving past Kasai peacefully and down the hallway, Akisame stumbled a little. Koinu moved in and let her lean on him then.

Akisame was only half as tall as her older brother, and still a little wobbly on her feet. But put beside one another, the siblings shared several inuyoukai features. They had fangs, their fingers ended in strong claws, for the most part they despised shoes and socks with a passion, and they were intensely loyal to those they considered family.

"Don't hurt Aki." Koinu growled, throwing a glare of his own now at Kasai.

The other girl shook her head. "I won't, Koinu!"

"Good." Koinu stepped in front of his sister and knelt, allowing her to crawl clumsily onto him in a piggyback position. "C'mon Aki, let's go find mama."

Inuyasha had already found her, and since finding her, had decided it was a mistake. She was in the kitchen, preparing a meal, but when she saw him her attention switched at once to vengeance.

"I want you to apologize to her." Kagome whispered. Her voice was soft and gentle; her grip on his ear was not.

Inuyasha gritted his teeth; his entire face was twisted in a grimace of pain. "Kagome!" he hissed through his teeth, "She's _pregnant!_" if he approached Sango again within the next few months she would likely thrust her sword through his gut. The early months of pregnancy had never agreed with Sango.

Kagome twisted his ear a fraction harder, making him whimper once and his face flush red with embarrassment. "Then you understand how hard things are for her right now."

Sometimes he wished Kaede were still alive. He could sneak out in the night, while Kagome and the children were sleeping, and beg the old crone for a subduing spell for Sango and Kagome. He entertained this fantasy a lot, especially wondering what his keyword would be.

"Kagome! She'll kill me!"

Koinu ran into them, with Akisame still riding on his back, grinning widely. When she spotted their parents she kicked and whimpered, reaching with one hand toward Inuyasha and Kagome. Koinu stopped, grumbling, and set her down. Akisame toddled forward, catching one leg of either parent and stepped on their feet, bouncing eagerly.

Kagome let go of Inuyasha's ear. The hanyou straightened, rubbing the wounded appendage and glaring at his wife as she knelt and took Akisame into her arms.

"Take Aki, Inuyasha. Sango loves her—she won't kill you while you're holding her."

Inuyasha's mouth fell open as he accepted Akisame. "Kagome…" he stammered.

She sighed and reached out, caressing his cheek. "Please, Inuyasha? Do it for me?"

The hanyou growled and hoisted Akisame higher on his chest. "Fine." He grumbled. When she smiled at him, Inuyasha felt his irritation melting slightly, though he struggled to keep it ignited and burning bright. Akisame whimpered and pawed at her mother, but Inuyasha held her back and took off, moving out of the kitchen and toward the hallway again.

Miroku and Sango shared a guest room while they stayed with Inuyasha and Kagome, which happened frequently. Since marrying, the couple had attempted to restart and rebuild the village of the demon slayers. It was a lot easier said than done, even as other demon slayers and people from the surrounding areas relocated to the village. Sango was haunted by the memories of her old family, her old village before it was sacked by the demons. Kohimu, their first son, had been born in her old house, in the old village. Sango suffered depression after his birth; it was only lifted when she and Miroku visited Inuyasha and Kagome on their estate.

It was sometimes discussed, and sometimes had happened, that Miroku and Sango lived with Inuyasha and Kagome more permanently. They pooled money, resources, everything. All in all, it was a safe bet that Miroku, Sango, and their many children spent at least as much time inside Inuyasha's estate as they did in their "real" home in the old demon slayer's village.

Inuyasha rapped his knuckles against the door to his guest room, scowling grimly. His acute ears told him that just inside, Miroku and Sango were speaking quietly. He caught a few words: "…Tisoki…no discipline…Kagome…"

And then he heard the swish of Miroku's robes. The monk slid the door open and blinked at Inuyasha with surprise. "Inuyasha…?"

"Where's Sango?" he asked, fighting Akisame as she squirmed and grunted, glaring up at her father's chin.

Miroku's lips narrowed into a thin line. "She's—"

"Kagome put you up to this, didn't she Inuyasha?" came Sango's voice from inside. Inuyasha heard their youngest child, their son Masuyo, starting to fuss warningly.

The hanyou snorted, "So what if she did?"

Miroku had closed his eyes, covered his face with the formerly cursed hand. "That was the _wrong_ thing to say, Inuyasha." He whispered.

Sango groaned angrily, and Inuyasha's keen ears caught the squeaks of the floorboards as she moved, apparently coming to exact her revenge. Fortunately for him this irritated Masuyo. He was a fussy baby still, hardly able to walk but otherwise a fat and healthy child, and currently Inuyasha's savior.

"Shh, shh…" Sango's anger evaporated, changing instantaneously to despair. "No…" she moaned.

Miroku abandoned his post at the door to help his wife. "Sango—let me take him, you rest…"

Akisame, hearing Masuyo's crying, began to whimper warningly herself. Inuyasha grunted, trying to control his squirmy daughter, and then quickly tossed out: "Sorry Sango!" he hurried away before the couple could react.

* * *

"Something troubles you, my lord?" Rin asked, quietly.

It had been several hours since he'd returned to Jouka and to Rin, much to her relief. They had not yet discussed the reason as to why Rin assumed he'd returned, but she wasn't worried. Sesshomaru's nose would tell him more than words ever could. They were picking over a meal that Jijo and a few of the other servants had prepared. Neither had much of an appetite. Rin understood her own reasons—nausea from the pregnancy—but she had yet to fathom Sesshomaru's.

Sesshomaru sat unmoving and unresponsive. The minutes passed and he failed to answer her.

Rin fingered her chopsticks uncertainly. Her fingers felt thick, cold, and clumsy. Eating roused no appetite, and looking down at the bowl of rice did nothing to settle her stomach. She let the chopsticks fall to her tray and settled back on her haunches, daring to stare at Sesshomaru more openly now.

"Rin wishes to know what's troubling the great Sesshomaru." She murmured, making sure to use her gentle, childish tone.

This drew a reaction, small as it was, but not the one that Rin wanted. The stoic inuyoukai shifted his weight very slightly, _away_ from her. It was an insignificant motion, but to Rin it spoke volumes. Alarm passed through her body like electricity.

"Is it something I've done?" she blurted, leaning forward. Her hands, fingers, her wrists all felt weakened, shaky. If she'd been standing she was certain she'd have fallen forward with weakness. The emotional swings of her pregnancy, the worry over Sesshomaru's behavior…it weighed on her heavily.

This time Sesshomaru glanced at her, blinking once. It was again only a tiny gesture, but Rin read it at once with relief. He was surprised, perhaps even shocked that she would believe she'd committed him some harm. "No, Rin." He murmured slowly, "It is nothing."

She nodded, half-bowing. "Please, my lord, tell me of your latest journey. What is it that has troubled you so?" perhaps it was the war in the Middle Lands, perhaps lives had been lost in a rebellion…but those were annoyances to Sesshomaru, not things that would drag his shoulders down, make his posture less than statuesque.

"It is nothing, Rin." He repeated, and now there was a note of warning in his voice, ordering her without saying it in words, that she should stop pestering him.

Rin bowed again, muttering an apology. Her heart hammered within her, she felt sticky where sweat was beginning to accumulate along her neckline, at the edge of her robes. "Does the great Lord Sesshomaru know why Rin has requested his return?"

Sesshomaru moved insubstantially, but this time the motion brought his attention more keenly toward her, a sign of his interest. "Yes." he answered evenly, "There is something I have not told you."

She sat up, facing him eagerly. "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru?"

He paused, as if uncertain for a moment. There was a flicker in his eyes, a slow narrowing of those golden irises for a split second, and then the emotion was gone, whatever it had been. When he finally spoke it was with ease and confidence. "Kuenai told me of a rumor. It was suggested that you may have been the victim of sabotage."

Rin blinked at him, "Sabotage?"

"Poison." Sesshomaru elaborated with a single word, gently but with a gravity to his voice that was undeniable. He wouldn't say "miscarriage" he would not spell out her misfortune. It was like speaking the names of the dead, inviting further wrath down on Rin if he did. He watched her from the corner of his eyes, though he pretended not to. It was too difficult to face her directly just yet.

She understood his meaning, as he knew she would. Her face twisted with grief momentarily, but she pushed it away, strong as always. Rin had suffered much in her short lifetime. The loss of her parents and brothers to bandits. The death by wolves and her resurrection at Sesshomaru's blade. The babies that washed away in blood were just more splashes of grief in her already full bucket. It was a heavy, painful load, but Rin was calloused—though one might never guess it looking at her—she was hard as stone, a beautiful thing forged by hardship. A diamond, cut out of the earth by Sesshomaru's claw…

"You moved me to Jouka because…" her breathing picked up, she swallowed thickly and abruptly pushed her tray away, dropping into a bow. "Lord Sesshomaru, this lowly one thanks you and asks that tomorrow she be allowed to journey to the nearby village to pray for luck at the shrine."

"No." Sesshomaru answered, without hesitation.

Rin lifted her eyes, baffled. "Lord Sesshomaru?"

"This is not the weather for one in your condition to travel." He responded, curtly. Seeing the way she fought her emotions, he shifted uneasily and added, "Remember my counsel in the past, Rin. You must not hope, it will only magnify your pain."

There was a moment in which it appeared that Rin would fight him, perhaps fiercely. Her face clenched up bitterly, her eyes narrowed…but then the expression faded into one of resignation. She nodded. "You are wise, Lord Sesshomaru…"

Forcing herself to snatch up the chopsticks again, Rin picked through her food and shoveled a bit into her mouth. Sesshomaru was right, in spite of how cruel it felt to her. He remained his usual, detached self. It was true, if she allowed herself to hope, to cherish the possibility that this baby might survive where all the others had failed because she was away from the possibility of sabotage, it would only harm her a thousand fold worse if she was wrong. There was always room for error, always room for death.

She swallowed her rice, closing her eyes and trying to mirror Sesshomaru in his cold, calculating intelligence. The hard mind that could love her and at the same time rule over all of the Western Lands…

* * *

Kagome, Koinu, Shippo, Kasai, and "the boys" were waiting in the sitting room when Inuyasha got there. Miroku and Sango's oldest boys, Kohimu and Tisoki, were strongly attached to their "aunt and uncle." From a very young age, they'd known the hanyou and Kagome almost as secondary parents. Kagome acted as babysitter before Koinu had been born, and sometimes still took care of them if something took Miroku and Sango away on business.

When she wasn't pregnant, Sango was still a renowned demon slayer. The fact that she was a _woman_ always startled customers. Miroku accompanied her, sometimes posing as the real demon slayer when there were difficult employers that didn't believe a woman had the strength or conviction to attack and kill demons. Most often, however, he acted as a sort of agent for her, although in the nitty-gritty of a fight he was always at her side, fighting. Shippo accompanied them at times, as did Inuyasha. Lately, however, the talk was that Kohimu would be joining his mother on the battlefield, beginning a long apprenticeship. He was almost nine years old; mature enough to be brought out into the battle.

In the long years since Naraku had been slain, Shippo had sprouted like a weed. He was easily as tall as Kohimu, the oldest of Miroku and Sango's boys, but far stronger. He was wiry, lanky, and his blonde-red hair had grown wild, uncontrollable with the approach of adolescence. His fox tail had grown right with him. It was a monstrous bush now that the kit had trouble controlling. The appendage had a tendency to suddenly tickle those sitting beside him, though Shippo seemed unaware of its actions and often embarrassed by it.

Kagome glanced up at him as he entered the room. "Inuyasha? Did you do it?"

"Yes." he harrumphed and took a seat at her side, still wearing a disgruntled, irritable expression on his face. Akisame scratched at his haori, reaching for Kagome.

"Why doesn't she talk like everyone else?" Tisoki asked, frowning. "Or is she missing that too?"

Tisoki was about seven years old, going swiftly on eight, and already it was glaringly obvious to both families that Tisoki had inherited Miroku's lechery. Inuyasha hadn't believed that such a thing could be passed along within a family in such a way, but Tisoki appeared to prove Miroku's claims correct. He was very young and already obsessed with the differences between girls and boys bodies. The question: "_Or is she missing that too_?" referred Akisame's lack of a penis.

"She isn't missing anything!" Inuyasha snapped.

"She'll talk when she's ready." Kagome inserted in a gentler voice, reaching for Akisame and taking her into her lap. Kagome stroked her fingers through her daughter's hair, cuddling her close. Akisame fell silent swiftly and started to nod off at once.

"Tea?" Inuyasha asked, raising his eyebrows expectantly.

"There's some left." Kagome motioned with her chin and her shoulder, carefully, trying not to disturb Akisame.

Inuyasha grunted and reached for it, nearly knocking over the other glasses on the table with his long, clumsy haori sleeves. He poured the last of the tea into a cup and downed it in a single swallow thirstily.

Koinu, sitting next to Kasai on the opposite side of the table, was starting to doze off. Kasai was staring at his ears, hatching up a slow plan to reach out and tweak them, like a cat hunting sleepy birds early in the morning. Her brothers were jabbering at her side loudly with Shippo.

Shippo often craved adventure since he'd started to grow rapidly, adventure and mischief. Demons matured slowly, in many ways. Shippo's powers had begun to grow, and sometimes Inuyasha's household couldn't contain him. Once every other month Shippo left the safety he had with Inuyasha, Kagome, and their children, and traveled the province, forcing himself to survive with fox magic and his own survival instincts. Kagome worried over him when he was gone, but so far the young fox demon had evaded true danger and only stretched his legs. The outings served to make him calmer, steadier when he was with Inuyasha and Kagome again. His growth spurts had brought more power and energy to him than he'd had before. In play he might accidentally hurt Kohimu or Tisoki. It was one of his greatest fears, so he abstained from playing with them and instead worked off his excess energy with these extended outings. Currently he was discussing rumors he'd heard on his latest trip around the province. Having returned only a matter of days ago—at the same time that Miroku and Sango showed up for a visit—the kit's stories would be brand new to Kagome and Inuyasha as well as Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai.

"There was a huge battle in the Middle Lands." His green eyes were alert and shining. "A war between the inuyoukai lords."

Inuyasha grunted, ears swiveling to focus on Shippo carefully now. "Not those bastards again."

"Inuyasha." Kagome scolded, shaking her head. "Langauge."

The hanyou snorted, "What's the point? Kohimu and Tisoki are old enough, Kasai isn't listening, Koinu and Shippo already know, and Aki's asleep." He threw her a challenging stare, smirking proudly.

Kagome huffed and gave up, looking back to Shippo for the rest of the story. "Go on Shippo, I'd like to hear about them. Do we know any of them?"

"Feh." The hanyou grumbled at her side, crossing his arms. "I _hope_ we don't. If any one of them comes asking me to help them, I swear I'll shove Tetsusaiga so far—"

"_Anyway…"_ Shippo interrupted, frowningly, "Yeah Kagome, there were. You know that guy that came to get the hanyou girl that stayed with us a couple years ago?"

Kagome was no longer staring at Shippo directly. She focused on Akisame, sleeping peacefully in her lap. The event that Shippo spoke of was a traumatic event for her, full of pain and suffering. She'd been taken prisoner, essentially, by the old female ruler of the Middle Lands, Lady Taikokajin, who had originally come under a flag of peace to ask for Inuyasha's help. To ensure it later, Taikokajin had abducted Kagome and kept her as a hostage to force Inuyasha to work for her. It had almost cost Kagome and Koinu—a baby at the time—their lives. She hadn't seen the inuyoukai that Shippo spoke of, but she knew about him vaguely as one of the many inuyoukai visitors their home had seen in that incident.

"I remember." She murmured. Akisame twitched under her mother's touch and then, reflexively, her lips began to make suckling motions.

Inuyasha's ears fell back at her side, the corners of his eyes crinkled with emotion though otherwise he refused to express anything but irritation. In reality he remembered the incident as well, and how close he'd come to losing Kagome and Koinu. "Why are you wasting our time with this Shippo?"

"I wanna hear!" Tisoki protested, leaning forward with Kohimu eagerly.

Shippo threw Inuyasha a smug grin and then plunged into his story again. "So, as I was saying, the guy that came and took the girl from us, him and some other guy, the ruler of the Middle Lands now—his mother was the pink-eyed one…"

Inuyasha's ears perked up then and he also leaned forward, listening with new interest. "Shimo-pup."

All eyes turned toward Inuyasha.

"You know who I'm talking about?" Shippo asked. "His name _did_ start with something like that."

"Just tell the rest of the story." The hanyou grumbled, withdrawing when he felt the weight of the others' eyes. The last thing he wanted to do was retell how he knew Shimofuri.

"Well," Shippo went on, hesitant now with so many interruptions, "The Shimo guy and his uncle, Sasu-something, waged war with old Nishiyori." Shippo took a moment to pause and puff out his chest proudly. "My family used to live there—in the Isei province. I was born there—we used to pay homage to Nishiyori. My parents used to think he was a moron." His voice gave a small, slight sadness away, but for the most part the memories of his parents' death was distant, as was his birth and birthplace.

"Who won? The good guy or the bad guy?" Kasai asked, alert to this tale now because Koinu was no longer nodding off—he'd keep her from playing with his ears while he was awake. At her age stories were all fairytales, filled with simple characters of good and evil.

Kohimu and Tisoki frowned as one at their sister. Kohimu spoke for them. "Stupid—Shippo didn't say one or the other side was _bad._"

Tisoki blinked at this, abruptly curious himself. He turned and looked back at Shippo, asking timidly, "Was one side bad? Was it that Shimo-guy?"

Shippo shrugged. "I dunno really." Uncertainly he searched Inuyasha and Kagome's faces, trying to gage their opinions. Kagome was still paying more attention to innocent Akisame in her lap than she was to the story and Inuyasha had a mildly sour expression that revealed little. Shippo at last shrugged again and continued on without answering. "The Shimo-guy and the other one Sasu…" he scowled, frustrated with his poor memory, "Whatever his name was. They won. I saw him once, though."

Kohimu and Tisoki gasped and stared with new awe at the kitsune youkai. "Really?"

Shippo nodded proudly. "Yep. Sure did." He neglected to mention that he'd run into a wall trying to escape and screamed for Inuyasha desperately, of course. "I heard that they killed all of Nishiyori's family—but they didn't take over his province. In fact the people there in the Isei told me they're part of the Western Lands now."

The youngsters at the table didn't understand the significance of this news, but Inuyasha and Kagome dropped their uncaring attitudes of moments before and looked toward Shippo with shock. Kagome's fingers had stilled on Akisame, Inuyasha at her side had stiffened and for a moment ceased breathing, waiting.

"The Western Lands? As in _Sesshomaru?"_ Kagome gaped.

Inuyasha tossed his two cents in at that moment. "What the hell? Why would Shimo-pup give anything to that bastard…?" his jaw clenched, his gaze drifted away. Inuyasha dove into his thoughts, into his memory, trying to find any hints or clues buried somewhere within.

Shippo was shaking his head slowly, "No one would say anything _why_ for sure. They told me all sorts of things that didn't make sense. Like Sesshomaru and that Shimo guy were working together because Sesshomaru was going to marry off a secret daughter to him or something. Or that Sesshomaru was holding the Shimo guy's sister hostage." He broke out grinning, "The one I heard the most was the dumbest of them all!"

"What was that?" Koinu asked, at last breaking his own long period of silence. He cocked his little head, listening carefully and with great thought, absorbing in all of this strange, distant politics. "And who is…" he shifted uncomfortably, trying to form the sounds correctly on his first try: "…Sessho-maru?"

Kagome and Inuyasha stared at their son from across the table, taken aback. They turned to one another, questioningly.

"You never told him…?"

"Why the hell would I!"

(A/N: I would like to point out that Sesshomaru appears early-ish in the series, but Kagome learns nothing until she actually meets him. Inuyasha doesn't go around telling people about his "family." So his choice here makes sense to me, he is showing us and Koinu, just how little Sesshomaru means to him.)

Koinu watched their interaction innocently, but with great intelligence. Knowing his parents as he did, he'd surmised from their behavior earlier, when this new name had emerged, that whoever this person was, his parents had known him. He'd grown up with many stories whispered to him on nights like this one: the defeat of the infamous Naraku, the tragic death of a priestess named Kikyo, the death of Kaede a few years before his birth, the moment when his parents had met, of how his father had somehow spent 50 years pinned to a tree with a priestess's arrow through his shoulder…

These stories were watered down for him, sugar-coated. For instance, he didn't know that the priestess Kikyo was the same that had trapped his father to a tree for 50 years. Also, he didn't know that his father had tried to _kill_ Kagome for the Jewel. He didn't know that Inuyasha had spent years chasing Kikyo while Kagome waited. There were many stories he'd heard, but few contained whole truth and every detail. And there were still many, many stories that hadn't been exposed yet, like bones of dinosaurs, buried deep in the skin of the earth.

The story of his great and powerful uncle Sesshomaru was just one that had failed to show. It just so happened that this enemy in his parent's past, this questionable character, happened to be his _uncle,_ a person he'd never met before, but shared many, many strong family traits with.

"Never mind that now!" Shippo interrupted impatiently, "You _have to hear this, _Inuyasha."

The hanyou rolled his eyes and said to Koinu, "I'll tell you in a minute Koinu."

Shippo hardly waited for him to finish speaking to his son before the kit was telling his story eagerly once more. "The story I heard the most to explain it all was that…" he sat back on his haunches—his fox tail flicked around eagerly of its own accord and whipped at Kohimu, making the boy cringe and push it away—and took on a deep, solemn tone, imitating the men who'd told him this story: "…_Lord Sesshomaru_ took the Isei because he helped Shimo-guy win the war when he otherwise couldn't have managed it. Now the Isei is his because that's where he keeps his wife."

"His wife?" Kagome choked.

Shippo had burst out laughing now and didn't answer her through his thick spasm of laughter.

When Kagome looked toward Inuyasha to seek out his opinion, she found the hanyou strangely blank. "Inuyasha?"

He blinked, as if startled, but quickly covered it up. "Feh. Anything's possible." Turning toward Koinu he announced, dully, "Sesshomaru is my older brother. Your uncle."

Koinu's eyes widened, his ears swiveled to and fro. "Really?" he glanced between his mother and father, astonished. It had never occurred to him that his father might have family. Kagome gave him a great-grandfather, a grandmother, and an uncle that he adored. Inuyasha had never spoken of his family to him. Now he imagined this mysterious Sessho-maru as a dog-eared, silver haired, Souta—and grinned happily.

Inuyasha caught this expression and scowled at once. "He's an asshole."

"Inuyasha." Kagome hissed, warningly. She tried to cover some of the damage, saying, "What your father means, Koinu, is that your uncle Sesshomaru…" she paused, searching for the right words and feeling how strange the words _uncle_ and _Sesshomaru_ felt when they fell in the same sentence. It was the same feeling she'd gotten when she'd first met Sesshomaru and been told that the hanyou and the inuyoukai were siblings. Back then _brother_ had felt bizarre as well.

"He's really mean, Koinu." Shippo added, solemn now. "You wouldn't want to meet him."

"Oh." Koinu's little ears dropped. He took a moment to search his parents' faces again and then looked down on his own hands, at the strands of fair hair that fell around his shoulders. Somehow, he felt a loss that he would never see this uncle, never understand his meanness. No one seemed willing to explain to him, and Koinu couldn't fathom it himself. He stared at Akisame sleeping peacefully in their mother's lap. How could siblings be mean to each other? Akisame shared the same scent, claws, fangs…and she had their father's eyes. He could never hate her, never harm her.

In this fairytale, one that Koinu hadn't been told yet, he could already see this unknown uncle, this Sessho-maru, as the "bad guy." The big bad wolf, sneaking through the night, looking for blood…

* * *

A/N: Since writing this piece I keep plotting out a story where Koinu, years later as a teen or an adolescent, runs into his infamous uncle. What would they say to one another? How would they react? How does the lord of the Western Lands view his nephew and his niece? The thoughts spinning in my head about it are fascinating. I could write a whole other spin-off about Inuyasha's children, or Miroku and Sango's for that matter, their adventures, strengths, weaknesses, and of course, their love interests. But one thing at a time my muse, one thing at a time... 


	12. Two Daughters

A/N: I'm glad that whatever possessed FFnet and made it stop sending out alerts is finally dead and gone at least for now. Grrr…another long chapter! Woohoo! To **New Fan:** sign in! Leaving long reviews always makes me want to write back and thank you, but alas, I can't when you are anonymous. You can ask anyone, (except my boyfriend) I don't bite. I promised to one that this would be the chapter that Sess finally gets his…I am sorry to announce it was too long, I had to cut it in half. So next chapter instead…

Disclaimer: Noooooope. Too bad I don't, there'd be a lot less money troubles.

* * *

Last Chapter: A long interlude of Inuyasha, Kagome, Koinu, Akisame, Miroku, Sango, Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, Masuyo, and of course Shippo. Phew! Shippo, having grown, discussed stories he heard while wandering through Japan, the war in the Isei. He also revealed the rumor of Sesshomaru having a wife to Inuyasha and Kagome. Meanwhile Sesshomaru returned to Rin at his palace Jouka in the Western Lands. Rin can tell he's troubled but he refuses to speak of it.

* * *

**Two Daughters**

Winter plodded onward. Rin spent most of it sleeping or talking to Jijo. Sesshomaru remained distant, though he was with her in the confines of the palace, never leaving. They ate their meals together, but Sesshomaru never mentioned her pregnancy, and never revealed his inner thoughts to her. Rin knew little about the war over the Isei, she didn't know that Sesshomaru was arranging the government there, securing himself as its new leader. Even if she had known it wouldn't have occupied much of her thoughts. Rin's mind could focus on only one thing, despite her efforts to distract herself from it.

Every day that passed mercifully without the sudden, aching pains of the miscarriage was a blessing and a small nudge in the direction of hope and joy. Rin's body adjusted as time went on. Her appetite returned with vigor. Soon when she ate beside Sesshomaru it was hurried, as if she had gone back in time and become a starving little girl again.

The winter storms blew on outside. Sunny days came, snow accumulated. On days when Sesshomaru was occupied with meeting his advisors and court retainers, Rin sat with Jijo on the porches and balconies of Jouka. Occasionally, if she felt strong and adventurous, she made the worried old woman walk with her through the gardens. Snow covered the gardens became a whole other world. An ice and snow maze that Rin could get lost in. While she was hidden away in them, feeling he chilly wind on her face, in her hair, and then the warmth of the weak winter sunlight at her back, she could forget, for a time, the precarious life that hung on inside her.

Yet as spring came closer, it became harder and harder for her to forget. Her appetite remained well but she felt weaker. The trips outside became fewer, although the sun was rising earlier and earlier over the landscape, melting the snow away bit by bit. Soon the horses would be set free from the stables to graze along the river. The cherry blossoms would start to peek out as tiny little buds on the branches of the trees in the gardens.

Sesshomaru withdrew from her in this time, allowing her to sleep. He ate without calling her to join him, and had meals sent to her in bed. Occasionally he brought them himself, but Rin hardly had the courage to look him in the eye. She couldn't bring herself to ask him to stay; often the solitude was helpful to her. Sesshomaru had large swathes of land to rule over. His presence was needed elsewhere, but he would stay unquestioningly with her while she struggled with his unborn child. Even so, it hurt Rin to see him withdrawing emotionally. She understood his reasoning—he had no expectation of success and didn't want to be present for the inevitable grief. Disaster was near…

But weeks passed and there came no blood, no sudden, sharp pains. The weakness remained, but Rin found more and more that she could ignore it. Hope began to spread its wings. Rin found herself focusing more and more on the child within her. As March neared, she estimated that the baby was one of her longest lasting, but it had another month to go before it would reach territory that Rin had never gotten to before.

Sesshomaru continued to remain distant, though his visits to her room became more frequent. He didn't call her to eat with him, but rather he brought the meals himself and watched over her as she ate them.

On one such day, as the temperature soared for the first time enough to begin melting the snow away in earnest, Sesshomaru brought her both her meals and her tea, acting as if he were a servant and not the proud, stubborn inuyoukai lord that he was. Shyly, Rin ate the food, trying to restrain herself from gobbling it down, and when that was finished she began with the tea. Every so often she paused to thank him, bowing clumsily from her bed.

Sesshomaru gave his customary response, "It is nothing." The meal was completely normal until, as she sipped at the first of her tea, he lifted his voice, sounding almost cautious, as if afraid. "The child is female."

Rin nearly choked on the tea. She set it aside, coughing fiercely. She didn't see it through her fit but Sesshomaru stiffened, concern softened his face. He waited patiently for her to recover, and then he asked, "You are surprised?"

He had never revealed this sort of thing to her before. It was logical for Rin to assume that he _knew_ the genders of every child she'd lost—she understood how powerful his sense of smell was—but he had never openly shared this information with her. It changed her view of him as she reevaluated her own pain alongside his. She carried the babies, but Sesshomaru scented them, knew their genders, perhaps other things that she couldn't even imagine.

"How…" she stammered, feeling her face heat up, no doubt coloring itself red, "How long have you known?"

The inuyoukai was stoic, though she thought she caught tenderness in the curve of his mouth. "Several weeks."

Rin searched his face, carefully. For some reason this made Sesshomaru look away, gazing into nothing, as if her scrutiny frightened him. Momentary alarm flashed through Rin, but she pushed it away, deciding that what she was seeing was in fact embarrassment. Sesshomaru rarely spoke candidly with her about their child. His language referring to it was always cold and distant since her miscarriages had begun. It was the largest clue she had to his pain, to his mourning of their lost children.

"What else do you know about her?" she asked, feeling a rising warmth inside her, a thrill to be able to put a gender on her child. It was like an unspoken promise of life, of success.

"I believe Kuenai was correct in his guess." Sesshomaru murmured, quietly. "You were sabotaged." He stared at her directly then, through the dimness of the room. Rin saw a twitch in his facial muscles, a quick, angry narrowing of the eyes. "It is my responsibility to find this saboteur and punish him."

Rin could see the ruthlessness in his face, the driving need he had for retribution. It stilled the warmth inside her, freezing it over. "Lord Sesshomaru." She whispered, leaning forward and reaching out to him.

Her palm cupped his cheek. His skin was burningly hot, and when his golden eyes flicked her way again, Rin felt the growing passion from him like the heat thrown from a flame.

It was a mutual, although unspoken agreement between the couple—since her second miscarriage—that sex was not possible between them during her pregnancies. For a time Rin had believed her first two miscarriages were the result of intimacy with Sesshomaru. He was not a harsh lover, but he was demanding. An inuyoukai lover possessed needs above and beyond the average human male. Sesshomaru was very capable of remaining celibate for decades if he had to, but once ignited he was a needy lover. It might take an entire night to satisfy him properly. Rin wasn't dead as far as desire was concerned, but she feared for her baby—_her daughter—_if she were to encourage her mate much further.

She let her hand fall away, but Sesshomaru snatched it, moving so fast that Rin hadn't even seen the movement. He held it in his hand, gripping it tightly. "You may travel to the village to worship at the shrine, if you wish." He told her, gently, "But travel protected, Rin. I will not lose you."

"You won't lose me." Rin smiled, staring into his face. She longed to kiss him, but feared where it would lead. As if reminding her what was at stake, Rin felt movement in her abdomen, like bubbles passing through water. She gasped and pulled away from Sesshomaru, feeling herself concernedly.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked her, roughly now, concerned.

Her pregnancy was about four months in, and Rin knew that she still _appeared_ thin, that the servants that didn't know her personally wouldn't have guessed that she was pregnant on sight. Her robes his any tiny signs, but Rin herself was aware of the change in her body shape. Her abdomen had grown hard, pushed out slightly with inner pressure. The flutter of movement in her now made her grin unrestrainedly.

"I felt her…" she breathed, looking up at her mate again with wide, overjoyed eyes.

"She is strong." Sesshomaru inclined his head insubstantially, giving only the slightest of nods. "Rin." He called, trying to recapture her attention.

"Yes?" she was shining, ecstatic…

Sesshomaru's eyes lost their focus. It was impossible to face her happiness without thinking of the looming disaster ahead. "I must leave you. I must avenge your loss."

Her face fell, but she recovered almost instantaneously. "I understand, my lord." There were multiple levels for her to be saddened about. Sesshomaru's language, "_your loss"_ told her that he was still removing himself from her pregnancies, unwilling to expose the pain she knew he felt. Then of course there was the fact that he would be leaving her for a time. It was for revenge essentially, to right a wrong, but Rin couldn't see how he'd find the saboteur. And, at any rate, it was likely there were multiple culprits. One to pay the poisoner, one to poison Rin, and a messenger to carry the money, the message, and the poison itself.

She couldn't fight his decision, however. Bowing, Rin answered, "May this lowly one ask that Lord Sesshomaru return to her swiftly?"

"Within the week." He answered, without hesitation. Then, after a small pause, he leaned forward and touched her, laying his hand over her long, black hair. He touched her ear, stroking it reverently with his clawed fingertips, then he touched her jaw, her cheek…

Rin shook under his touch, closing her eyes. She longed to look up at him, to welcome him into her bed, but the memory of the baby moving inside her was so fresh…

Sesshomaru made the move, not giving her the choice. He moved forward, without warning, and, with her chin in between his powerful fingers, raised her chin enough to kiss her. In spite of his unexpected movement, his kiss was gentle and tender, expressing without words, the love he felt for her. He withheld his passion, understanding her fear. The kiss ended and he rose to his feet, moving away through the darkness of her room like a wraith.

Rin shuddered with her own suppressed desire and sighed. Her tea had grown cold, but so had her thirst for it. Wrapping her arms around herself, Rin focused her thoughts on her—_their—_daughter, and tried to imagine what the child would look like…

* * *

When Sesshomaru had told Rin that he needed to leave and avenge her miscarriages, he'd been telling the truth, but only partially. There was another reason why he had to leave her, as much as he despised being taken away.

Daken had been sent from the Isei, from the secret palace where Ginrei and Tsukiyume were hidden away. He came with several bits of news. The first was that, as the snows began melting with the warming weather; strange youkai had been spotted lingering around the palace. Daken had sent for more guards to protect the women, but before they'd come, Tsukiyume was abducted in the night.

That was startling enough to draw Sesshomaru away from Jouka in itself. He had to corroborate Daken's story and find the girl. If she was killed of injured, her brother would surely blame Sesshomaru and it would lead to a whole new war. Sesshomaru didn't fear the young inuyoukai lord, but it wouldn't just be Shimofuri that he'd be forced to battle. The whole of the Middle Lands, and all of the inuyoukai clan, could be turned against him. Even then Sesshomaru felt he stood a chance at victory, but it would damage his people, their land, their confidence in him…

None of that was very palatable to Sesshomaru.

News of a different kind stunned him as well. Daken told him that Ginrei was with child. He'd doubted the news and insisted that Daken explain how he knew this. Apparently Ginrei had not sent for Sesshomaru, she had no desire to see him. Jaken and Tsukiyume had called for Daken when they noticed her scent changing. When Daken had asked Ginrei directly she asked him _not_ to speak to Sesshomaru. She didn't want her husband to return to her, and she was perfectly content to carry his potential heir without him hovering over her—as any inuyoukai father would.

Daken, in spite of his doubts, had honored Ginrei's request. When he gave Sesshomaru news from Naishougoto, he left out Ginrei's pregnancy. It was only when Tsukiyume was abducted that he'd decided it was wise to tell Sesshomaru the full truth.

Sesshomaru had sat in the meeting room with Daken, silent and stunned. He stared ahead, unseeingly while Daken told him all of this, finishing at last with, "Unless my nose has lost its touch over the centuries, I believe Lord Sesshomaru, that you and your wife will be welcoming a daughter come late summer." He smirked nervously, showing his fanged canines.

_A daughter. _Sesshomaru allowed the realization to sink in, and then asked himself whether or not he _believed_ it. Ginrei's behavior was erratic. Now that she was pregnant she didn't want him there, perhaps she wanted to keep the child secret. Perhaps she was ashamed and couldn't face him.

In many ways Sesshomaru understood that emotion: shame. The last thing he wanted to do was see Ginrei in Naishougoto.

With a last bit of hope, Sesshomaru entertained the thought that Daken was wrong, or mistaken, or playing a very, very cruel joke on him. He asked—and was irritated by the breathlessness and weakness his voice revealed—Daken whether or not he had scented Ginrei himself, or if all of this had been reported to him second hand.

Daken snorted, shifting uncomfortably, but there was a small sliver of pain in his eyes that he didn't bother to hide. "You insult me, Lord Sesshomaru! _Of course_ I scented her myself. There is no doubt about it. You are now the proud father of Lady Ginrei's child."

Panic tried to insert itself. Sesshomaru felt his joints weaken, as if he'd been drugged. His voice shook slightly when he spoke, though his tone was mercifully still cold and uncaring. "Perhaps she found another male…"

Daken visibly bristled, his brow furrowing. He interrupted Sesshomaru fiercely. "Lady Ginrei is not a common whore. I smelled _you_ very clearly in that pup." Daken's continually smirking face twisted, becoming a snarl, "Take responsibility for your actions, Sesshomaru."

He'd scolded Daken for the outburst, but was, nonetheless, ashamed. In a matter of months he'd gone from being childless, heirless, to having two females pregnant with his _daughters._ Daughters weren't what he truly needed, but they intimidated him because they were part of him, they shared his genes undoubtedly. The instincts rolling around inside him were confusing, complex—and entirely unwanted.

But he couldn't push them aside as much as he wanted to. Tsukiyume had been abducted. That matter came first. He had no choice but to leave and investigate. He tried to keep his mind open, to avoid revealing his near-panic. There were many reasons why someone would abduct Tsukiyume, none of which Sesshomaru liked. It could've been unrest in the Isei and Tsukiyume was taken because she was the blood-sister of Shimofuri, the current ruler. It could've been done to threaten Sesshomaru himself, or even to start a war between Shimofuri and Sesshomaru.

It might have no political motive behind it as well. Hanyou were despised by humans as well as demon-kind. Scenting her, an angry youkai might've rushed in and taken her just to kill her or enslave her as a personal show of power.

The least threatening, and yet most disturbing thought on Tsukiyume's disappearance, was that it might've been orchestrated by her brother, Shimofuri. If that were the case it meant that Tsukiyume would be safe, which was good, but it also showed Sesshomaru that the young ruler was capable of leading an uprising. Without Tsukiyume to control Shimofuri, Sesshomaru's power was under threat. Shimofuri could retake the Isei. He could expose Sesshomaru, even take Ginrei from him, stealing Sesshomaru's heirs…

It was all of this combined that forced Sesshomaru to leave Rin. He left for Naishougoto first, eager to deal with the trouble there and put it behind him as best as he could. He left with Daken, hurrying through the mountain passes across the Western Lands. The snow remained thick and deep in most areas, impossible for humans to pass through, and difficult even for some youkai. It slowed their journeying time, increasing Sesshomaru's agitation all the while.

* * *

(_A week or so earlier at Naishougoto)_

Tsukiyume hadn't been able to look at Ginrei directly for weeks. She wanted to befriend the inuyoukai woman, but when she smelled Ginrei's pregnancy, when she saw Ginrei eating or drinking and living life as if nothing had changed, as if nothing was wrong, she was sickened inside. Every word spoken to Ginrei was a betrayal to Rin.

Tsukiyume could remember the smell of Rin's grief, the leftover stink of blood from her lost babies. Rin's tears too haunted her.

Ginrei had no fear of losing her child, she probably, Tsukiyume mused, thought nothing of the baby. Perhaps, though Tsukiyume thought this was highly unlikely, Ginrei was not even aware of the child within her. She showed no interest in the idea of summoning Sesshomaru, she wished to continue her lessons, even those that involved physical training, and her pregnancy was virtually without symptoms. There was no hardship for Ginrei; in fact it seemed to be the opposite. She was cheerier than Tsukiyume had ever seen her, although she was no more talkative than usual.

Jaken had nothing but good things to say about her, and he was pleased that she was pregnant. His nose, not as sharp as even an inuhanyou's, was still able to detect the difference. And he'd scented the change in Rin enough to recognize it in a fellow youkai. Tsukiyume wanted to speak out to the toad, to ask him how he could be happy about it when it was nothing but despicable, a huge, unthinkable betrayal of poor Rin…but she didn't have the courage.

On the night of her abduction the chefs served an elaborate meal and some tea to Tsukiyume, Jaken, and Ginrei. Jaken, as always, was the biggest talker.

"That Daken fellow that Lord Sesshomaru uses as a messenger…" he was saying, while gulping down mouthfuls of pickles, "…has told me that there are some strange demons roaming around."

Ginrei and Tsukiyume didn't respond. Tsukiyume focused on her tea, though she didn't drink it. Ginrei stared at the toad, hands folded in her lap, her face blank but her eyes alert. This was all the encouragement that Jaken needed. He'd talked so much during the evening, mostly about trivial things that meant nothing, that the women had finished their meals long ago and were already on tea. Jaken was only just moving to drink his own and his food wasn't even gone yet.

"I can't believe Lord Sesshomaru would leave us here so unprotected! No strange youkai should be able to get within miles of this place!" he was fuming, grumblingly. "That Daken is going to bring in more protection, as I understand it, but…" he stammered, losing his point, "Still!"

During his little speech, Ginrei had reached for her tea and, when it was lifted halfway to her lips, she faltered, nearly spilling it. She set the cup down as fast as she could, grimacing. Her sudden movements drew Jaken and Tsukiyume's eyes together.

Jaken was at once concerned. Since he'd learned that she was pregnant, Jaken had grown especially gentle with her. The idea of his beloved Lord Sesshomaru at last producing an heir was such wonderful news to him that he could see nothing else. He understood that Rin was in the dark, that Sesshomaru was playing a dangerous game, and on some level it was likely that he disapproved, but his love for Sesshomaru outweighed that thought and blinded him. "Are you all right, Lady Ginrei?"

She nodded, but she'd placed one hand over her abdomen, the other was still setting the teacup on the table, pushing it away from her. "I'm fine." She responded, quietly. Her gaze slid over the table and lifted to meet with Tsukiyume's. The inuyoukai woman smiled gently, though her silver eyes showed uncertainty. She was aware of Tsukiyume's unusual quiet for a long time now, and also aware that the hanyou was uncomfortable around her. She'd tried, on many occasions, to do what she'd done just now, and then search Tsukiyume's face when the hanyou girl was caught staring at her, unabashedly. Now she caught Tsukiyume's orange-brown eyes narrowed at her with some unreadable, negative emotion—resentment, dislike.

Timidly, Ginrei looked away at once, feeling her face heat up.

Tsukiyume did the same, focusing on the table as if it had started lecturing her on something she was about to be tested on.

Jaken made a tiny noise of contentment and reached forward, snatching up his tea in his tiny, three-fingered hands. He slurped down the drink clumsily, making yummy noises loud and clearly.

"I'm going to bed." Tsukiyume announced. She scooted back from the table and rose to her feet.

"You never touched your tea, girl!" Jaken called out, horrified that she could turn down something as perfect as tea.

"You can have it, Jaken." Tsukiyume tossed the words over her shoulder and slid the door open, disappearing into the darkened hallway outside.

The toad shook his head. "Ungrateful hanyou." He clumsily reached across the table, trying to grab Tsukiyume's tea for himself.

While he was busy with that, Ginrei swallowed nervously, coming to an abrupt decision. "Jaken, I believe I also will retire." Ginrei bowed slightly, smiling faintly at the toad. She'd become fond of him over the weeks. He was a silly, fussy creature. He was an inappropriate teacher for her, seeing as that Ginrei was more educated than he was in many areas. She endured lessons that were nothing more than review for her day after day without complaint. Jaken had showed her unwavering, blind kindness, mostly because she was pregnant with his beloved Lord Sesshomaru's heir, but even so, Ginrei couldn't turn away the well-meaning toad.

"Oh! Yes, you must be tired, Lady Ginrei." Jaken stopped reaching for Tsukiyume's tea and watched her exiting with a warm, even tender gaze. "Sleep well Lady Ginrei!"

Ginrei slipped out into the hallway, pausing for a moment as she slid the door shut behind her. It was unlit outside, and chilled. Ginrei huddled her robes around her more closely. She took a deep breath and started down the narrow hall—not toward her own room, but toward Tsukiyume's.

She reached the door and stood still, listening and smelling with her acute senses. Tsukiyume, on the other side of the door, was doing the same thing and frowning deeply.

"What do you want, Lady Ginrei?" she asked, trying to sound neutral, bland. _Just like Sesshomaru…_

"Have I done something to offend you, Lady Tsukiyume?" Ginrei asked. She knew that using formal terms with Tsukiyume would annoy the hanyou, but she couldn't restrain herself. Traditional, respectful titles had been pounded into her from birth as a courtly woman. In seeking information or an apology, courtesy was key. She couldn't leave out a nice title to Tsukiyume now…

"You haven't done anything." Tsukiyume sighed, but she could still feel her face set in a hard scowl, in spite of her own reassurances to Ginrei. "Go to sleep, my lady."

Ginrei held her breath for a moment, considering her options. At last she slid Tsukiyume's door open and stepped into the room. It was lit with braziers and warmer than the hallway. She shivered as she stepped into the little room's warmth.

From her futon in the center of the room, Tsukiyume twisted her dog ears around, listening to Ginrei's entrance. She felt a growing bubble of annoyance inside her, ready to pop and spew its noxious contents everywhere. She rolled her shoulders in their sockets, repeated an internal mantra to try and disperse her frustration. _Ginrei is not deserving of my dislike…she is a victim. Ginrei is a victim…_

But the memory of Rin's blood, her grief, her suffering…_Rin is just as much a victim…_

"Lady Ginrei?" she asked, hesitantly.

"You harbor some negativity toward me." Ginrei murmured, confidently. "What have I done to offend you?"

Tsukiyume sighed, closing her eyes frustratedly. "Nothing." She repeated, ears drooping.

"Then why do you treat me as you do? For weeks now you've ignored me, you refuse to teach me as you once did. What have I done to displease you?" the words were well-practiced, careful, and formal. Ginrei had given them thought and she'd been well-trained. A good little lady of the court.

The thought made Tsukiyume's blood start to boil. She flicked her clawed fingers, took a deep breath. Anger was new to her, though the politics of the court were not. Her mother and brother had versed her in them. In some ways she and Ginrei were alike, though Ginrei had been taught much more extensively than Tsukiyume had. In the past Tsukiyume had been taught to speak eloquently, to argue her opinions as an assignment from her brother or her mother. Now things were personal. In days passed she'd felt nothing toward the topics her mother or her brother gave her to practice with. Now Ginrei was made an enemy emotionally, though rationally Tsukiyume knew she had no reason not to befriend her, and no reason not to tell her the truth…

Tsukiyume's ears fell backward as she considered it. Sesshomaru was unlikely to have told Ginrei. The two women, his mate and his wife, knew nothing of one another. They knew nothing of their shared troubles, of their ironic likeness to one another: Rin and Ginrei were both without family, unless Sesshomaru was counted. They were both trying to have the said inuyoukai lord's offspring. They were both interested in education, in power…

They might've bonded if Sesshomaru had introduced Ginrei gently into his household. Instead he flirted with disaster.

He might've bought Tsukiyume's loyalty, but instead he used her to distract or comfort one woman or the other. He told her she could go home, and then coerced her to stay somewhere else.

Tsukiyume's hands curled into fists, her mind was made up.

"Has Lord Sesshomaru ever mentioned to Lady Ginrei where he goes when he isn't with her?" Tsukiyume asked, abruptly. Her ears were still pinned warningly against her thick black hair.

There was a pause; Ginrei was startled into silence for some time. At last she said, "No…"

"Then Lord Sesshomaru has never told you of his mate." Tsukiyume felt her heart picking up speed, a sickening twist in her stomach—_excitement._ She wondered, was this what her brother or her mother felt when they had control over another sentient creature? Was this what _Sesshomaru_ felt when he kept Tsukiyume away from Shimofuri, and through her, controlled him? _I have complete power over you…_

But her power was not over Ginrei in this moment, if was over Sesshomaru and he had no idea. Wherever he was at that moment, he was living in a false security that Tsukiyume was about to shatter.

The twisting in her stomach increased, making her want to scream to relieve it.

"His mate?" Ginrei asked, clueless.

"Her name is Lady Rin. Before he brought me here I was her companion." Tsukiyume fought her own facial muscles, fought the smug smile that was trying to take shape there.

Ginrei shifted slightly, perhaps trying to step forward. She would want to see Tsukiyume's face of course. The hanyou girl made no move to face her and Ginrei stopped moving, settling for saying, "I have heard her name before." She was cautious but curious, "Who is she?"

"She is a human woman." Tsukiyume strained her ears, listening for the intake of air, the gasp, the outrage that was sure to follow…

None came. Only a question, "Human?"

"Yes. Sesshomaru loves her a great deal. He rescued her when she was a girl, resurrected her with the sword his father passed onto him—the Tenseiga." Tsukiyume fought the urge to turn and stare openly at her victim's face as she spoke.

Ginrei spoke quickly now, commenting on Tsukiyume's lack of respect for Sesshomaru. "You did not give my husband the correct title, Lady Tsukiyume."

Tsukiyume could resist no longer. She turned around, facing the door to her room and the inuyoukai woman who'd invaded it. Her white ears flattened down on her skull. "That's right, I didn't." she felt her jaw tightening, her claws biting into the flesh of her palms, "If you want the truth, Lady Ginrei, my loyalty belongs with shish-sama and with Lady Rin." She stared at the floor, afraid of the anger her eyes would expose if she looked directly at Ginrei. "I cannot approve of what he's doing here."

Ginrei was stiff. "You mean with me?"

Tsukiyume felt her anger spike for a second, then drift away into a softer bitterness. "You don't understand—Lady Rin has been at his side for years. In all of those years she has been unable to have his child." Tsukiyume felt her face heating up. It was a betrayal to speak of Rin's misfortune. It would be like calling down the lost souls of her unborn babies to take revenge and silence Tsukiyume for exposing their would-be mother's shame.

"She is barren?" Ginrei asked, hardly whispering. Tsukiyume picked out sympathy in her voice and bristled at once.

"No." she glared up at Ginrei and then looked away, bitter.

Ginrei lowered herself down gradually into a sitting position on Tsukiyume's floor. She was thinking carefully, reading into Tsukiyume's words as much truth as she could. One hand found her still flat abdomen and stayed there; mirroring the path her thoughts were taking. "You feel it isn't fair that I am…"

Tsukiyume stopped her from saying more, "Forget what I've said. Sesshomaru is a monster. He's told Lady Rin nothing about you, and you nothing about Lady Rin."

Ginrei was gazing at her keenly. "It would be a great burden for you. Knowing us both, but unable to defy Lord Sesshomaru."

Tsukiyume felt her anger rising again, this time with no outlet. How could Ginrei be so astute suddenly? Had pregnancy steadied her emotions, calmed her? How cruel that Ginrei—who probably could've cared less whether she birthed the child or not—would be so blessed by the onset of pregnancy while Rin both loved and dreaded each day, always fearing and yet expecting the loss. It angered Tsukiyume as she'd never been before. The politics, which she'd always been taught to discuss dryly, mimicking great leaders like Sesshomaru, were cruel and heartless underneath; right to the people they affected the most.

"Just please…" Tsukiyume broke the silence and to her shame, felt her voice cracking as the pressure in her chest built beyond her capacity to control it. "Leave me."

Ginrei nodded and rose to her feet, vanishing silently.

Tsukiyume sat frozen after the inuyoukai woman had left. She drew deep breaths, burying her anger, her frustration at her helplessness…

And then the world erupted around her. Through her shuttered window, a little clay pot smashed through and crashed onto the floor. It burst open and a thick, greasy smoke filled the room. Tsukiyume gasped, stumbling away from it in shock. She lifted her arm over her face, covering her nose and mouth. When the smoke hit the brazier burning in one corner, it doused the flame, pitching the room into the blackness.

Tsukiyume coughed and tried to crawl for the door. "Jaken!" she shouted, thinking in the back of her mind how stupid she was to call to a toad for help. What would he do to help her? She opened her mouth and cried out, "Ginrei!"

Footsteps were approaching over the floorboards outside. She heard Ginrei's feminine voice faintly and Jaken's high pitch, panicked whimpering.

A shadow smashed through the wall where the window had admitted the smoking clay pot. Its scent was thick and musky even through the stink of the smoke. Tsukiyume cried out with fresh panic. "Help me!"

The thing—a demon—rushed at her. It was clothed in black, like a ninja. Tsukiyume shouted at it, drawing up her previous rage, and slashed at it. The creature ducked her attack and lunged for her. She fought, kicking, screaming. The door to her room slid open; she heard cries of alarm from Ginrei and Jaken. Other female voices were accumulating as well, the maids.

The thing grabbed up her wrists and flung her over his shoulder. Tsukiyume screamed. The world spun as the ninja beast barreled out of her room. The chilly night air reached Tsukiyume's skin.

Desperate, Tsukiyume brought her knee around and, with all of the strength she could manage in her awkward position; she kneed him in the gut. The creature groaned and stumbled, falling into the lumpy, left over patches of snow. Tsukiyume was thrown from his shoulders. She rolled over the ground, clawing at the snow, at the weeds and rocks around her. In a moment she was on her feet and dropped into the battle ready position. Her eyes adjusted to the darkness and roved around until they found the black-clad youkai a few feet away, hauling himself cautiously to his feet.

"Get out of my way!" she snarled, trying—and succeeding she thought—to sound dangerous.

The creature faced her, and now she saw that past his black mask he had light colored eyes, blue or green. "Lady Tsukiyume." He called, hissing to stay quiet, "I've been sent by Lord Sasugainu to bring you back to your brother."

Tsukiyume blinked, her tense, self-defense posture wavered a little. "Who are you?"

"My name is Kofum. I'm a mongrel." His voice was wry, self-mocking, "Part inuyoukai, part wolf youkai. My father was from Nishiyori's clan."

Tsukiyume stared at him, searchingly. Behind him, nearly dragging the snow, she could see a furry tail, dark gray in color. She tried to scent him, and—barely—passed the stink of the smoke; she found his story was true.

"Why would my uncle send you and not someone I'd recognize?" she wasn't about to let herself be kidnapped if it wasn't _really _her uncle and her brother in charge.

"They cannot let this incident be connected directly to them." he took a breath and held it a moment. "I'm sorry my lady, I cannot tell you more. We must leave, they will come after you swiftly." He leapt past her, making Tsukiyume gasp and stumble out of the way. The mongrel youkai stopped several bounds ahead and turned back to regard her. "Are you coming?"

Tsukiyume glanced briefly back at Naishougoto. The palace was in an uproar. Already she could see lanterns and torches being lit, she could hear the frantic shouting…

She smirked and turned to face Kofum. "I'm coming."

* * *

A/N: I had to split this chapter into 2 chapters, so as a result you get a sneak peek at the exciting, climactic next chapter! (Which happens, I think, to be lucky number 13…):

_She stared at him, still hearing the ringing in her ears, the press of something heavy and thick against her chest, making it hard for her to breathe. Every breath was a miracle because she took it without throwing up all over the floor. "I cannot believe you." her voice was a pathetic whimper, weakness…so like a human…_


	13. Sesshomaru and the Truth

A/N: I meant to have this part in last chapter, but it ended up being just too long with it in there, like more than 20 pages in word. So…this is the chapter you've been waiting for. THIS IS THE CHAPTER that Sesshomaru will be exposed…

Disclaimer: Shimofuri is MINE!! lol

* * *

Last chapter: Sesshomaru left Rin after staying with her at Jouka for a few months. He told her that they are going to have a baby girl. Her pregnancy has yet to fail. He left Jouka for Naishougoto because Daken told him two things: Tsukiyume has been abducted, and by who and why they don't know. Secondly Ginrei is pregnant with Sesshomaru's daughter. Two daughters by two different women. What luck, huh? Tsukiyume was abducted by Kofum, a mongrel youkai, both dog and wolf demon. Before leaving she told Ginrei about Rin.

* * *

**Sesshomaru and the Truth**

Rin woke early the day after Sesshomaru had left her. Her stomach was tight, twisted in a knot. At first this made her fear that she was about to miscarry—and strange little ache or pain in her belly made her fear this—but it proved to be hunger and…something else. Intuition she would swear by it later. Her body had known that day that something was about to change her life.

Forever.

She dressed and, feeling unusually energetic, ate and drank her breakfast earlier than usual. Afterwards she retired to her room to practice writing. She enjoyed the ink brush in her hand, the deep, dark blackness of the inkwell, the slash of the darkness against the light rice paper…

Four poems in Jijo hurried into her room, dropping at once into a bow. She was breathing heavily, and when Rin acknowledged her and she sat up, fear was evident on her old, wrinkled face.

"What is it, Jijo?"

"My lady," the old woman panted, "The guards have escorted an inuyoukai into the palace. He claims to know you—he seeks an audience with you. _Alone_."

Rin blinked, her mind began working at once. It was improper, of course, for Rin to be called on by another male, man or youkai. For this male, whoever he was, to come seeking her, he must truly know her, or simply be out of his mind. Had the guards been forced to bring him into the palace? Had he threatened their lives?

"What is his name, Jijo?" Rin asked, gravely.

"You cannot be thinking of seeing him!" she gaped helplessly, appalled.

"His name." Rin repeated, pinching her lips together in a thin, troubled line.

Jijo bowed and answered, "He claims to be Lord Shimofuri from the Middle Lands."

_Shimofuri._ She remembered Tsukiyume's older brother. He was a handsome young lord, blue-black hair that shone like Sesshomaru's never could simply because of its color. And his eyes were memorable as looking like water on a cloudy day, gray and perhaps gloomy. She had always felt badly for him that Tsukiyume was taken from him as a hostage. Shimofuri had been helpless, manipulated, controlled.

Because of the politics, Rin knew she had to be wary of him. Tsukiyume had been with them for a long time, and Shimofuri hadn't been pleased with it. Sesshomaru had at last returned Tsukiyume to him, but emotions likely still festered. Could he honestly have come to take Rin as _his_ hostage?

She didn't believe it.

Taking a deep breath, Rin pushed herself out of her desk. "Jijo, get me my outer robe, would you?" she moved, stepping toward a long, full-length, silvered mirror.

"My lady, you cannot!" Jijo was gasping, "What would Lord Sesshomaru think—!"

"I can trust Lord Shimofuri." Rin interrupted, frowning. "Fetch my outer robe. Call the maids, have them pin my hair up." She turned sideways, staring at her body, squinting. Shimofuri had the nose of an inuyoukai. He would know from the moment she entered the room that she was pregnant. He would know Sesshomaru was weakest with her in this condition…and that Rin herself would put up little of a fight…

She hesitated only for a moment, and then bit her lip, lifted her chin. "Jijo! Have the maids bring perfume as well."

Jijo walked out of the room with a grim mask spread out over her deep wrinkles.

A flock of maids descended on Rin seconds later. They wrapped her outermost robe over her, tied it decoratively, and brought out the perfumes. They doused their fingers with the perfumes, jasmines and the scents of crushed flowers, and then combed her hair with their fingers as well as with her ivory combs. They pinned her hair high on her head, curling it around itself and using the combs to keep it in place.

Normally this would've sufficed, but now, as they began to finish and back away from her, Rin ordered them to apply more perfume. They pulled out fruit-smelling perfumes now and began dampening clothes with the perfumes and then pressing them to Rin's skin and her robes. The room reeked of spices and sweets when Rin was finally satisfied.

"Bring me to him." she ordered Jijo. The maids stared after her, wide-eyed and stunned. They whispered as she left the room.

Rin passed through the halls, aware of her rich robes, the heaviness of them. They were almost as elaborate as the ones she had worn when she and Sesshomaru performed an almost wedding-like ceremony to formalize their relationship. The thought of those earlier, passionate days, made Rin's face burn, and the heat of desire spread through her. She buried it as best as she could and waited as Jijo slid open the door to the meeting room.

Normally Sesshomaru was the only one that used the meeting room, although Rin had, occasionally had lessons in it as a child and adolescent. Jijo prostrated herself just inside the door while Rin waited, remaining out of sight. This little ceremony, how to enter a room properly during an audience, had been one of Rin's many lessons. But in those days it was assumed that she would be married off to a samurai lord and would come into the room not as the mistress, but as a pretty little thing to decorate the background. Even so, Rin was perfectly comfortable with the little ritual.

Jijo was introducing her. "Lady Rin, mate of the great Lord Sesshomaru." Despite Jijo's practice with such things, Rin made out the uncertainty in her voice, the small wavering there that told her, and certainly Shimofuri, that she was nervous.

Jijo scooted aside, bowing again as Rin moved elegantly past her and into the audience room. It was a bland room, rectangular in shape. The screens here were intermittent. Some were thin and allowed the sunlight from outside to enter the room. Others sections of the walls in the room were secret rooms with soldiers or guards ready to spring should their lady order it. Jouka was understaffed; it was possible that there weren't any guards to protect Rin. Shimofuri would know it better than she would; his keen ears would pick out the sounds of breathing where Rin's couldn't.

Sitting some ten feet away, a small step down from Rin's hosting platform, Shimofuri sat tensely. As she seated herself in the rustle of her robes, Rin watched Shimofuri out of the corner of her eye. The young lord dropped into a low bow—but not before she caught the twist of disgust on his face. He'd smelled her overpowering perfume, as she'd intended.

"Lady Rin." He murmured, lips nearly against the floor.

"Lord Shimofuri." She responded, gently.

He sat up, and his face was under his careful control again, stoic and cold. But not completely. In her long years with Sesshomaru, Rin had come to know their subtle emotional displays very well. In Shimofuri she could see tenseness and determination…and…sympathy? She took in his face again, scrutinizing it while trying to appear as though she were nothing but a porcelain doll, waiting for him to speak.

The compressed lips, the tightness of his jaw being clenched and then unclenched. But his eyes, they revealed tenderness in the tightening only at the edges, and the way they were bright, watery. Determination coupled with nervousness, and of course, sympathy.

She'd always known he was a caring youkai.

"Lord Shimofuri—your visit is most unexpected." She announced, beginning this meeting because he appeared hesitant.

Shimofuri dipped his head in a nod. "Yes, I apologize, my lady."

"May I ask what brings you here?"

"It is not…" he swallowed, and she saw his Adam's apple bob with the motion, "…good news that brings me to you, Lady Rin."

Rin cocked her head to one side, showing him curiosity. "Then you bring bad news?"

"I'm afraid so." His lips were thinned even more so. "I must inform you of your mate's dishonesty."

This made Rin stop. She stared at him, unblinking. Her stomach twisted and flip flopped on itself, her legs felt as though all blood had suddenly been drained out of them. This was a reaction brought on multiple levels. One was the basic fear of any woman, of any man even for that matter, of dishonesty in one's lover. The other was larger than that; the realization that one's evaluation of another is _all wrong._

In this case she was thinking of Shimofuri. She had judged him to be honest, caring, and trustworthy. Yet Sesshomaru _had_ done things to damage their relationship. To destroy trust. Rin hadn't thought it was enough for Shimofuri to turn against Sesshomaru, but perhaps she'd been wrong, perhaps power had corrupted the young inuyoukai since she'd last seen him. He came to her now trying to convince her to turn against her mate? She would not be convinced easily.

Acutely, she felt a sense of danger. A ringing started up in her ears, her heart fluttered like a sparrow caught in midair by a cat.

"I'm afraid I have little interest in hearing lies about Lord Sesshomaru." She replied, dryly, even so, she was frustrated by how her voice sounded weak, breathless. He would know his words had affected her already just by insinuating that something was wrong. "I'm going to have to ask you to leave, Lord Shimofuri."

"Please." Shimofuri bowed low to her, "Please, Lady Rin. You must hear my words."

"I understand," she began cautiously, "That you may be bitter toward Lord Sesshomaru for his part in holding your sister captive. But I assure you young lord, she was well-treated here. I loved your sister dearly. I was sorry to see her leave—but she has been returned to you…"

As she'd spoken, Shimofuri had risen from his bow and made a motion to interrupt her, heatedly. She could see the fire in his eyes, the genuine anger he felt at having had his sister taken and held against him. Rin had already made up her mind to dismiss him—but his words made her pause, shocked all over again. "My sister has _not_ been returned to me, as I'm sure Lord Sesshomaru told you."

Rin blinked, her mind moved fast, swimming through her memories. Sesshomaru held a fear of rebellion against Shimofuri. Had Shimofuri caused trouble recently that she wasn't aware of? She remembered his arrival months ago, the troubled golden eyes, his refusal to tell her anything of it…

Fear gripped her, stiffening all of her muscles. "Lord Sesshomaru would _never_ kill Tsukiyume…"

Shimofuri's eyes narrowed with disdain, "I wouldn't put it past him, my lady. He _did not_ return my sister to me, as you believed he had. He lied to you and took her instead to a different palace, in the Isei province of the Middle Lands."

"The war-torn province?" she asked. She knew of the war in the Middle Lands, understood that it was caused by a rebellion by Nishiyori. She also knew that with Sesshomaru's help, Nishiyori's family had been destroyed. As far as she knew, the Isei had been Sesshomaru's sole price for his aide in the war effort. Was Shimofuri bitter about that as well? The land was essentially _his…_

"Yes. You know that it has been annexed to the Western Lands, as outlined by Lord Sesshomaru, myself, and my uncle, Sasugainu." He was cold now, speaking like a diplomat, filling in meaningless holes so that his point, when he made it, would be clear as spring water.

"Yes. The Isei belongs to Lord Sesshomaru. Why would he bring Tsukiyume to the Isei?" Rin felt her body stiffening, preparing to suffer some sort of blow, but what it was she couldn't imagine. _Why would he lie to me about Tsukiyume…?_ She had been distressed, Tsukiyume had not written her…

"She was to keep someone company for him." Shimofuri answered vaguely. When Rin opened her mouth to interrupt him, Shimofuri continued onward, refusing to be stopped, "I will tell you who in a moment, my lady. First you must understand something else about the war in the Isei."

Rin sat back, trying to take a few deep breaths, trying to compose herself. Her hands, in her lap, folded over her belly, trying to draw comfort from the life still growing inside her. "Go on."

Shimofuri nodded solemnly and continued. "The terms for Sesshomaru's involvement against Lord Nishiyori were that the land would be annexed to the Western Lands—and that when his family fell, our armies would spare him one inuyoukai bitch that was unrelated to him."

Rin struggled to maintain an unaffected composure, but beneath it she was starting to shake, starting to crumble. She was anything but naive, and she was beginning to anticipate where this was going…

"As you already know, Sesshomaru also took Tsukiyume from me and held her as a hostage. This was to guarantee my silence on these terms." He stared at her pointedly, "I am breaking that silence with you, my lady. My uncle has arranged for Tsukiyume's return to me. We have _taken_ her from Sesshomaru's control. I hope you can forgive us for this."

Rin opened her mouth to speak, but found that she had somehow lost her voice. She cleared her throat and then gave up, gesturing for Shimofuri to continue.

He searched her face for a moment, perhaps wondering if it was wise to go on, but the hard look in his eyes didn't falter, the disdain remained. It was not meant for Rin, but rather it was aimed at Sesshomaru. He had abandoned the use of proper titles when referring to Rin's mate, telling Rin that there was hostility, but it was beginning to make a little _too_ much sense.

Sesshomaru craved power. He was ruthless at times. He actively destroyed threats to himself or others. Keeping Tsukiyume as he had never had made sense to Rin. Now it was striking her as making _perfect_ sense. She remembered years ago, right before he'd taken here as a mate, that he'd realized his offspring with her could wield Tetsusaiga. He confronted Inuyasha, telling him that as a hanyou he'd never be able to produce offspring. Unfortunately Inuyasha had found a loophole in that and fathered a son. To keep his half-brother from being a danger—and in spite of Sesshomaru's insistence to the contrary, Rin knew he had a healthy respect for his brother; the loss of his arm was a constant reminder—he'd been determined to kill Inuyasha's mate and child. Rin had begged him, sacrificing herself to stop him at last.

When they'd met again a few years later, Rin had had to stop another potential battle. Sesshomaru's pride was insulted because his _little_ brother had managed to start a family while he, _the great lord of the Western Lands_, had not. By then Rin had already suffered several miscarriages. Rin had always known that, as a human, she could never produce proper heirs for Sesshomaru. She'd gone into the relationship content that eventually he would have to take an inuyoukai woman to produce his heirs. It was just a fact of life for her.

…But there was shame within her too, that she had been unable to have his children. Could his frustration, his inadvertently abused pride, have made him do what Shimofuri was describing…?

She swallowed, beginning to feel sick.

"Sesshomaru took my sister to a palace in the Isei. It's there that he keeps the inuyoukai bitch that my armies kept alive for him. He would not bargain with the clan, he makes it clear that he despises us. He has taken this unfortunate woman and kept her alive when the war killed all of the rest of her family." Shimofuri lowered his eyes, avoiding her gaze, "I was present at the wedding ceremony, Lady Rin. I was to stand in for this woman's family, because my father was from Nishiyori's clan, I was her closest relative left alive."

There was both disgust and sympathy in his voice as he spoke of this inuyoukai woman, but Rin found her head spinning wildly. She thrust out one hand onto the floor at her side, trying to stop herself from wavering. The only thing that rang through her head in his explanation was, "…_wedding ceremony…"_

"Lady Rin?" Shimfori asked, bringing Rin abruptly out of her haze.

She stared at him, still hearing the ringing in her ears, the press of something heavy and thick against her chest, making it hard for her to breathe. Every breath was a miracle because she took it without throwing up all over the floor. "I cannot believe you." her voice was a pathetic whimper, weakness…so like a human…

Shimofuri's face was drawn now, haggard. He was human-like; he seemed to have aged several years in the past few minutes. "I was afraid you would say such a thing, Lady Rin. That is why I brought my sister's letters to you. In them she describes the palace and Sesshomaru's secret wife." He reached inside his robes, which were dirtied and travel worn, and produced several white sheets of pretty, rich rice paper. "In these is all the evidence you should require to know that my words are not a deception."

Rin's mouth was dry, her throat burning. "Bring them to me."

Shimofuri bowed and looked to Jijo. The old woman heaved herself up off her knees and hurried forward. Her eyes were shining with tears. As she walked they slipped silently down her face, a few wetted the letters that she carried up to Rin on her platform. Rin snatched them away from her with shaking hands. She tried to read them but the world was still swimming around her, dizzyingly. A few of the words and sentences leapt out at her, like little demons, clawing at her eyes. Shimofuri was right, she recognized the handwriting as Tsukiyume's.

_Shishi-sama, I have missed you very much…Sesshomaru read my letters, I could not speak frankly with you…he will not let me write to Lady Rin…_

_The palace is small, ugly. I miss home; I hate the smell of the lake, like decay, like the war here in the Isei…_

_Sesshomaru's wife is beautiful but traumatized. She blames you, shishi-sama, for the war that killed her family. I told her that Lord Sesshomaru was just as much responsible for it, maybe more so, and she believed me. I wondered if she would kill him, but no one can kill Sesshomaru…_

_She is fair haired, with strange, silver eyes. His heirs will be like ghosts. _

_I am terrified for Lady Rin…he has not told her—and all of her lost babies…_

Rin pushed the letters away as if they'd burned her. Her skin flushed first hot and then cold when she looked up at Shimofuri. His face had twisted again, but not with anger or bitterness, instead he wore an expression bordering on horror. Rin, even through the strange illness of emotion that had possessed her, could imagine what he was thinking: _what have I done…?_

"Lady Rin." His words were short, nervous, and clipped. "I am truly sorry to have to bring you this news…" he swallowed rather loudly and stared into his lap, as if suddenly shy. "Forgive me. I did not know until a moment ago—your scent…" he stammered, but Rin was sharp enough to understand what he was trying to say.

She'd done a good job hiding her scent with the perfume. Shimofuri had been unable to pick up her pregnancy until mere moments ago, after it was too late to stop his tale. Now he regretted telling her, fearing for her health…

_I could die._ Rin found herself thinking, with remarkable clarity, _I could die and Sesshomaru would live with my ghost for the rest of his long days…_

It was almost tempting. She could excuse herself from Shimofuri and go to her room. There were many swords and daggers that Sesshomaru had had made for her over the years. She could find one, force the maids out of the room, and plunge it through her body…it would be the most poignant ending for her. The most tragic.

But Rin was not a fan of tragedies, nor of wasted life. Sesshomaru had betrayed her; he had done this behind her back, going to great lengths to do it. She thought of this other woman, of the war that Sesshomaru had used to acquire her…

There were two choices before her. One was that she could face Sesshomaru with this knowledge; she could understand it from his side of things. She could meet his _wife;_ she could get to know her. She could support her mate as a good—although perhaps mindless—woman should. She could stay at Jouka and bear his daughter or miscarry the child and then try, as she always had before, to conceive again. This choice made some sense—she had always known there would be another woman, an inuyoukai. _But she had always thought it would be done in the open. _She could imagine sharing Sesshomaru with a female she knew, even that she liked. But the deception, and the cruelty with which Sesshomaru had _taken_ this other woman…

Her eyes refocused on Shimofuri's haggard, worried face, and the thoughts, her choices, continued to spin themselves in her mind.

There was another path. It would be a devastating one for everyone—but it would particularly annoying to Sesshomaru. Rin examined the idea at the same time her gaze scrutinized Shimofuri. She remembered a conversation she'd had with Sesshomaru months ago, regarding his lack of trust in Shimofuri, his unspoken fear of losing control of the young leader.

"_One can never assume one is safe in one's position. Shimofuri is young and high from his victory in the Isei. To trust is to be blind."_

Shimofuri was shifting nervously under her silent stare, unable to bear the weight of it, the guilt of knowing that he had told Rin the truth as she was carrying her lover's child…he didn't know that Rin was hardening like stone, growing stronger with each passing second as she hatched a plan that was almost Naraku-worthy.

_Sesshomaru, to trust is to be blind? Then I will blind you, just as you have blinded me._

"Lord Shimofuri." She spoke with a strong, albeit raspy voice. The inuyoukai lord jumped at her voice and stared, expectantly. "I assume you have come here to harm my mate by telling me about this."

He blinked, taken aback. "My lady," he bowed, "I felt you needed to know."

"You are a poor liar." She smiled, though it was cold and without warmth. "But I would prefer a poor liar to one who can deceive me as Sesshomaru has." She turned her face away briefly, feeling her body flush with heat and cold again, her limbs were shaking, as if she had just vomited. She had spoken her mate's name without the proper title. It was something she had _never_ done before…

When she looked back at Shimofuri she saw that he understood the weight of this event. His face was grim, solemn, but there was something in his eyes, a slow, buried enjoyment.

"What is it you wished to accomplish, Lord Shimofuri?" she asked, boldly.

"I had no plans beyond exposing your mate, my lady. I…" his voice trailed off, his face colored embarrassedly.

"You wanted to hurt him." Rin finished for him. "To gain vengeance. Am I not correct?"

"It is not land I care about." Shimofuri spoke up with new force, "It is my sister. It is the woman he took without your knowledge. It is his deceit and his abuse of the clan I am concerned with."

"And so you decided to use me to hurt him." Rin added, nodding slowly. She sat back, her spine stiffening like a steel rod. "I thank you for letting me know."

Shimofuri was eyeing her warily. "What will you do now, my lady?"

"I will help you punish him." she grinned, coldly.

* * *

They reached Naishougoto late at night. Daken was fatigued, exhausted from running back and forth between the two distant palaces. He was eager, and content, to find a futon and rest a while. When one was as old as Daken was strength was sometimes hard to come by.

Sesshomaru was young, however, and antsy, eager to uncover Tsukiyume's abductor, and the reasons behind it, and then deal with the two pregnant females in his life. "Where was she taken?" he asked as they skirted around the palace's premises.

"Along the swampiest part of the lake. From her room. There was more snow a few days ago—the tracks have gone. They were upright, bipedal." Daken answered, yawning. He was so tired he couldn't even take up his characteristic smirk.

Sesshomaru moved forward, standing on the shore of the lake that Daken had identified. "What of the scents?" he asked.

"You can't smell them anymore?"

Sesshomaru made no reply, merely continued to walk, slowly, along the lake, searching for clues.

Daken finished another long yawn and then announced, "She might've gone willingly."

This news made Sesshomaru turn around and glare at Daken. "Willingly?"

"There were two sets of footprints; one of them was the hanyou girl's. She followed him after awhile."

Sesshomaru snarled, uncharacteristically, and pushed past Daken angrily. "There is no need to search any further."

Daken followed the enraged Sesshomaru at a distance, smirking nervously. "You think it was Shimofuri then, don't you?"

There was no reply from the inuyoukai lord. They passed through the moonlight, one young and shining eerily in the silvered light, the other dark and shadowy, grizzled, old, and slumped sleepily. They entered the palace, catching several human guards as they slept. Sesshomaru knocked them to either side, waking them up with a startle. He glared but said nothing as he passed by, they were humiliated enough to be caught sleeping. Sesshomaru could kill them for such a mistake.

From the second he entered the palace, Sesshomaru knew that Daken had been right. The palace reeked with Ginrei's rich, and very pregnant scent. Anger and shame warred within him at it. Anger at himself for allowing it to happen. Anger with her that she had not told him sooner. Shame that at the same time Rin was pregnant too and he had left her for Naishougoto. And, worst of all, shame that her scent spurred instinctual desire inside him, even now.

Leaving Daken behind, Sesshomaru passed up the stairs like a ghost, as silently as he was physically capable. He crossed over the floorboards, barely breathing, and down the hallway. Ginrei's room stood before him, the door was left partly open, allowing him to see inside.

His wife was awake, sitting up on her bed and staring at him quite frankly. She did not appear different at all, there was no huge change physically, but emotionally he sensed she was calm, almost unaffected by the sight of him.

The similarities between his last image of Rin, sitting up in her bed, and now his first sight of Ginrei, sitting up in her bed, unnerved him. Sesshomaru turned his back on her and began to move away. Nothing she could've said at that moment would stop him from walking on by…

"I know about your mate."

_Except_ that.

Her whispered words froze him, keeping him in place. He waited, wondering if she would expose more.

"You love a human." There was no reproach in her words, rather the opposite, a sort of wonder. "A great, powerful inuyoukai." Ginrei went on, still quiet, still gentle. "And he loves the weakest of creatures."

Anger, brash and abrupt, swept over Sesshomaru. He turned round and glared at her with narrowed, murderous eyes. "Who told you this?"

Ginrei was unfazed at his reaction. "Tsukiyume. Just before she was taken away." Her voice had dropped at that, saddened.

He changed the subject swiftly, demanding, "Why did you not send for me?"

Ginrei lifted her eyes to the ceiling, frowning for the first time. "Would you have come?"

Sesshomaru paused, unable to answer her. He knew the truth: no, it was unlikely. He would've ordered the guards to be doubled, for a healer to be posted and at the ready. He would've left Daken there permanently and hired someone else to pass written messages back and forth. He wouldn't have gone out to see her, to dote on her—especially not when Rin was pregnant. Rin came first.

"You wouldn't have come." Ginrei answered for him. Her voice was only slightly bitter. When Sesshomaru stared at her, even through the dark, he could see her face was calm and uncaring. "And now, I know why. I understand you more than I did before. Tsukiyume called you a monster." When Sesshomaru looked up, bristling at her relayed insult, he was startled to see Ginrei smirking at him; her fangs gleamed through the nighttime. "But I imagine, in your mind, you're doing only what you have to."

Her interpretation unnerved him. Sesshomaru was torn between trying to silence her and turning his back on her. Bother were enticing ideas. The palace slept around them; Sesshomaru could hear their breaths, their heartbeats. Daken was already snoring; Jaken was panicking in some sort of silly nightmare downstairs.

When she opened her mouth to speak again, Sesshomaru interrupted her before she could start. "Sleep, Ginrei."

Her smirk had yet to vanish. "Worried about your heir?" she cocked her head to one side, letting her long, silver hair spill over her left shoulder. "Or worried because I'm hitting a nerve?"

_Worried about your heir._ Her words forced Sesshomaru to remember Rin, back across the miles and the mountains, hidden away at Jouka. She would be sleeping now as well, thinking of their daughter tucked safely inside her. She could never imagine that her child already had a sibling due only a few weeks after its birth.

Ginrei was staring at him as if she could read his mind, his soul. For a moment Sesshomaru thought he should slash her with Tenseiga, just to be certain that she was not some being that actually could bewitch him and read his mind, endanger his soul.

But then she was talking again, unstoppably. "Tsukiyume told me your mate had not been able to give you children. I know from Jaken that you despise the clan. In your mind you needed heirs and a wife from the clan. You cheated them, killed my family, and took me so you could get them."

Sesshomaru at last couldn't withstand her words. He fell to defending himself from her. "Shimofuri killed your family and took you."

"You asked him to." Ginrei retorted, quietly. She was dry-eyed and serious, her gaze unwavering. She lifted her arms in an irreverent gesture and at last a little more bitterness entered her voice, letting Sesshomaru feel the interaction was more normal now. "And here I am."

Anxiously, Sesshomaru strode forward, entering her room and sliding the door shut behind him. Her scent was powerful, strong, but although his body was trying to respond, his will overpowered it. "You will be silent." He warned her, coldly.

"You don't like to hear the truth do you?" Ginrei asked. Without the light from the hallway her face was darkened and Sesshomaru could only make out the wet shine of her eyes—but he _smelled_ tears. "I know why you did it now." she shook her head, sniffling a little, "You're not a monster—but what you did…it was _wrong._" Her voice rose, growing shriller. "You _must_ see that!"

She paused, as if waiting for an answer, but Sesshomaru offered her nothing. He stayed where he was, frozen and silent, like a statue.

Ginrei sniffled again, the scent of tears thickened in the room, pushing out the other scents that risked arousing Sesshomaru. "If you had come to my father and asked for me, they would've given me to you. _I _would've gone to you willingly. What did you think you accomplished with slaughter?" her voice was rising higher, making Sesshomaru resist the need to wince and slap his hand over her mouth to silence her before she woke the rest of the palace. "What would your mate think of you, if she knew? Is that why you did it? To keep it from her?"

Sesshomaru's stomach clenched up, his breath became harder to draw. He fought, but his heartbeat sped up, taking off. Ginrei had composed everything his seemingly non-existent conscience—or perhaps it was just gagged—had thrown at him for months now. Sesshomaru was very good at suppressing petty things like emotion. Emotion was a weakness, it gave a creature away. Fear exposed itself to enemies, giving them an upper hand. Pain or remorse or guilt impeded one from doing what was necessary to get to the top…

"Tsukiyume told me," Ginrei was murmuring again, gently, "That you saved her when she was a little girl. If you've known her for so long—she would accept your need for heirs…" her voice cracked, "You didn't have to slaughter them…"

Sesshomaru swallowed thickly. "Stop, Ginrei." His voice was thick. He squeezed his eyes shut and forced down the bubble of pain and anxiety. Her breathing was rough, but it was not sobbing. It was a quiet, controlled crying of a mourner.

"You don't like the truth, do you, husband?" she asked, her tone mildly mocking, but mostly full of pain. "You know it is the truth…"

"Yes." Sesshomaru almost choked on the word, but when he spoke again his voice had settled. "It is."

Ginrei pressed him, "You were wrong to do what you did."

"Yes." she couldn't see his face, he was thankful for that. He allowed his eyes to close, it helped when he couldn't see the wet, shining outline of her tear-streaked face. It helped when he could only hear her voice and know this was _Ginrei_, not _Rin._

"It can't be taken back now." Ginrei drew in a ragged breath, stuttering a little. "It can only be accepted."

Dully, Sesshomaru murmured, "I am sorry."

Ginrei snorted and then laughed harshly once. But what she said was, "Thank you."

There was a long moment of silence, and then Sesshomaru tensed when he heard Ginrei moving, crawling over her bed and setting her feet on the floor. She crossed the small room and reached out to him, touching his chest tentatively. Then she wrapped her arms around him, sighing.

Sesshomaru accepted this, uncomfortably. Cautiously, he touched her shoulder, her hair, trying weakly to offer comfort. It was awkward, but tender.

She released him then and withdrew, moving back to her bed. Sesshomaru watched her shadow cross the room and settle back on the futon, confusedly. When she spoke at last it was with new vigor and strength. "What will happen to this baby?"

"What do you mean?" he asked, warily.

"Is she mine, or yours, husband?" Ginrei clarified smoothly. "And a name?"

_A daughter._ Sesshomaru recalled, feeling relief swarm over him that sanity had returned once more. "We had not decided." He told her thoughtfully. "There is no hurry."

"And a name…?"

Sesshomaru resisted the frown that was trying to creep over his face, though Ginrei couldn't see it. "It is too soon for that." _It might not survive…_

Ginrei, apparently, was not as aware of the likelihood of miscarriage, for obvious reasons. "_Hanone._" She whispered. "It will fit her well if she is like you at all."

_Hanone. Fang._

Her words stung him, but they were accurate. Sesshomaru turned his back on her without answering and slid open her door, slipping out of the room and into the comparative brightness of the hallway.

_You don't like the truth, do you?_ She was right, through and through. He _hated_ it.

_You didn't need to slaughter them. Did you do it to keep it from Rin? What would Rin think of you, if she knew?_

Sesshomaru paused, staring straight ahead. He had planned to sleep but…the pressure inside his chest, the bubble of anxiety…the conscience he thought he'd buried…

Turning around, Sesshomaru slid the door open to Ginrei's room and slipped into it again. "Ginrei." She was already looking up at him, alertly. "I am leaving…" he paused, feeling his throat close up, but somehow he managed a very quiet, last two words to her. "Thank you."

"You're going to your mate?" Ginrei asked, eyeing him critically.

"Yes."

She bowed on her bed, letting her silver hair spill over her shoulders messily. "I will see you again, husband?"

"Yes."

He slid the door shut and hurried—silently—through the palace, vanishing like a ghost over the moonlit, early spring land.

* * *

A/N: And just because I can…

"_You, woman." Sesshomaru addressed her, rudely, "Where's Rin?" _

_The old woman gulped and fell to her knees in a pathetic heap of a bow. "I-I tried t-to stop her, Lord Ses—"_

_Sesshomaru's golden eyes narrowed. "Where's Rin?" he repeated, firmly. _

"_She's gone!" the old woman blubbered, bawling. _


	14. Runaway

A/N: wow and the writing just keeps on rolling out of me…See, it's exam week and my classes just aren't that taxing, so I've had little to do. My parents took the SIMS 2 from me so I can't even waste time with that for now. So mainly I sit, listen to music, and write this story. Lucky for all of you, eh? I learned today, by picking up a neglected envelope I found on my desk amidst my other accumulated garbage, that a short story I wrote for an English class didn't win the award my college offers yearly for that sort of thing, BUT it was one of the finalists the letter told me, so it said, "Kudos! You done good kid!" But somehow that depressed me. To make myself feel better I'm going to post this chapter now because I feel like it. Who cares if it's 2 in the AM and I have an exam tomorrow at noon? It's for mythology, and I heart mythology…

Disclaimer: I do not own Sesshomaru or Inuyasha. I just wish I did.

* * *

Last Chapter: Shimofuri revealed the truth to Rin. She announced that she was going to "help" him "punish" Sesshomaru. Meanwhile, Sesshomaru concluded that Tsukiyume was abducted by someone working for her brother and uncle. He faced off with Ginrei, discovering her truly pregnant as Daken said. Ginrei threw him a little harsh truth. Sesshomaru left Naishougoto to return to Jouka and tell Rin the truth, to stop deceiving her. Unfortunately as we all know, he is too late.

* * *

**Runaway**

Sleet rushed out of the sky at them, soaking them to the bone. It was night, deep and dark and ugly. Lightening flashed across the sky, cutting it in two. The clouds blotted out the stars. Rin felt like, if Shimofuri were to suddenly turn on her and cut her open, that was what would spill out of her. _Rage, fury, torment. _

They walked through the crusty, half-melted snow of the mountain passes. Rin had refused an escort of guards. She took with her only a few of the swords that Sesshomaru had made for her, as well a horse to carry a few other valuable, meaningful objects. She dressed in the armor Sesshomaru had had constructed for her personally. She painted her face with the marks of a demon. Not Sesshomaru's marks now, but ones of her own design: red and jagged, like wounds spilling blood.

She regretted the heaviness of the armor now. She was reluctant to ride the horse; it was dangerous to do considering the fragile life inside her. Over and over she told herself she didn't care whether it lived or died anymore, but inwardly she knew that was far from true. Sesshomaru had hurt her, yes, but the child was as much hers as it was his.

Jouka was farther from the Middle Lands than any of Sesshomaru's castles or palaces. It would be a long, arduous journey without the aide of the horse. Shimofuri traveled some distance ahead, scoping out the trail. He maintained a safe distance from her—for fear of spooking the horse. He estimated that it would take them a week or more, and considering her condition, he was thoroughly against her plan to journey back with him—to run away from Sesshomaru.

But Rin was insistent. She would not be convinced otherwise. She would go with Shimofuri, or she would go without him and find someone else to offer her support to. Going with Shimofuri, however, was better for her plan because Sesshomaru was growing steadily more afraid of the young ruler. She was giving herself away to Shimofuri as a hostage.

It would be devastating to her power-hungry mate. In losing her he would lose everything: his lover, his ward, his protégé, and his unborn daughter.

This was their third day of travel, the most miserable yet, and in the darkest parts, Rin tormented herself, wondering whether Sesshomaru cared about her baby. Would he breathe a sigh of relief when he found she was gone?

But she dismissed this idea, not because it wasn't possible, but because of how Shimofuri had described Sesshomaru's treatment of his _wife._ She was forced into the ceremony, chosen against her will, kept alive when the rest of her family was slaughtered in the war. It was cruel, crueler than Rin had thought Sesshomaru ever could be, but it was too cruel for her to see anything of any substance coming from the relationship. Perhaps it could be a consummated marriage, perhaps this inuyoukai woman could give him heirs as he planned, but Rin had doubts. If she had switched places with the inuyoukai woman she knew she never would've consented to anything.

But that thought was terrifying as well. Sesshomaru was brutal enough that he would _rape_ this unfortunate "wife" to get the heirs he needed?

She saw light up ahead. The horse walking behind her, an old mare named Roba, lifted her head and snorted warningly. She could probably smell both the fire and the inuyoukai looking after it and didn't like either. Rin tugged her along, working her way down the melting ice and sharp, poky rocks.

Shimofuri waited for her. He was soaking wet, dripping. The firelight lit the hollows beneath his eyes, making him look older and dangerous. But his voice when he spoke was still young and soft. "Lady Rin. There is a village some distance ahead. Do you wish to warm up and rest here and then continue onward to the village?"

"How much farther?" she asked, tying up Roba some twenty feet away and un-slinging the packs over her back.

"You should not exert yourself, Lady Rin." Shimofuri pointed out, worriedly.

"You can't do it." Rin shot back at him, "She'll spook."

This drew a small smirk from Shimofuri. "We do not really require a horse, my lady. I could carry that load easily."

"I like horses." She moved away from the horse and sat across the fire from him, trying to shelter herself in the low branches of a pine tree.

Shimofuri admired her, cocking his head to one side. "You could pass for an inuyoukai—if not for the fact that your paint is running."

Rin reached up and touched her cheeks. Her fingers came back bright red, like blood. She frowned, imagining that she looked like a war victim, a vengeful ghost of a soldier that had died in one of the many wars that swept Feudal Japan. It looked as if she was crying tears of blood. The rain and sleet splattered and thumped against the metal of her armor. A village full of humans would never take her in. They were more likely to accept the true inuyoukai Shimofuri first.

Shimofuri shook his head, worrying again. "It was never in my plans to bring you back, Lady Rin—and in your condition…" he closed his mouth, uncertainly, fearful of insulting her.

"I choose this." Rin muttered, sighing. "You couldn't stop me, Lord Shimofuri." She closed her eyes and tilted her head upward, toward the sky. _And you can't stop me either, Sesshomaru._

* * *

Only a matter of days after Rin had left Jouka, Sesshomaru returned to it, eager to see her. To his shock he found the palace deserted. The guards had abandoned it, and most of the maids and household servants had fled as well, nowhere to be found.

There was one left who met him, a maid, Rin's favorite as he recalled. He couldn't remember her name. As he entered the palace, with growing alarm at it emptiness, he saw the old woman emerge from Rin's room, wide-eyed and stuttering, trying to speak.

"You, woman." Sesshomaru addressed her, rudely, "Where's Rin?"

The old woman gulped and fell to her knees in a pathetic heap of a bow. "I-I tried t-to stop her, Lord Ses—"

Sesshomaru's golden eyes narrowed. "Where's Rin?" he repeated, firmly.

"She's gone!" the old woman blubbered, bawling.

Sesshomaru fought off the wave of cold that spread over him, the growing sense of doom. "Where?" his voice had gotten louder, it was near to shouting.

"She left with the visitor, the dog demon—"

Sesshomaru had at last lost his patience. Kneeling in a swift motion, he scooped up the old woman from the floor and lifted her high with his single arm. _"Where is Rin?"_ there was a faint red gleam beginning to grow in his otherwise honey-colored eyes.

The old woman began to cry loudly, her words were barely intelligible through her panic. "She left with him when he told her!" she pawed weakly at his strong fist holding her up. Her feet dangled helplessly.

"_Who?"_ Sesshomaru demanded, shaking her once.

"Sheem…" her pronunciation worsened as Sesshomaru's grip choked the air out of her, but that single syllable was enough to tell him what he needed to know, what he'd suspected.

Unceremoniously he dropped the old woman onto the floor. She curled into a helpless ball, coughing and sucking at the air like a fish out of water. Sesshomaru moved out of the palace hurriedly, purposefully. Outside, in the gardens he stood still for a moment. The sky was bright and beautiful. A few clouds were making their way across the sun. The first cherry blossoms were beginning to appear as tiny irregular bumps and nodules along the tree branches.

The tips of Sesshomaru's hand began to glow a sickening green. With one short, angry cry, he lashed out snapping his green whip out at the nearest budding tree. The whip slashed through the tree's trunk, toppling it at once. Before it had finished falling, Sesshomaru had retracted his whip and vanished.

* * *

Before Shimofuri reached his main battlement, deeper inside the flatter country of the southern province—the Nanka—he stopped at the border town between the Middle Lands Nanka province and the large swathe of Sesshomaru's territory, the Western Lands. It was close to the border of the Nanka, the Isei, and the Western Lands. Shimofuri had actually set out from that point and had instructed his uncle, Sasugainu, to wait for his return there.

What hadn't been planned out was his returning with Rin in tow.

The border town, Sakaime, was small and relatively unguarded. It was exposed. Shimofuri was nervous upon entering it. So close to the Western Lands, it was sure to be crawling with people who might perhaps recognize Rin. She was easily memorable at any rate. A human woman masquerading as an inuyoukai.

The crowds parted for Rin as she passed, people and youkai alike gawked. A few knew Shimofuri when they saw him—he'd been a traveler before he'd taken control of the Middle Lands, but they kept their distance, stunned. Rin entered riding her old mare Roba and still wearing her armor, painted a fierce black. Her face paint had washed off after the storm, but her expression was fierce enough without it. After a week's travel on the road, facing the turbulent early spring weather, and brooding about Sesshomaru's betrayal and the likelihood of losing her baby, Rin was in a foul mood.

At the center of the small city there was a small palace, fortified by a great wall. The guards at their posts stood at the ready, and they wielded firearms. They pointed the clumsy tools at Shimofuri and Rin and ordered them to a stop.

"I am Lord Shimofuri." The inuyoukai told them, irritably. "Is Sasugainu staying within this palace?"

One of the guards nodded curtly. "Yeah—but Lord Shimofuri doesn't travel with strange women like _that._"

"Let us by." Shimofuri growled, warningly. He changed his stance a little, exposing his claws, trying to tell them that he meant business.

The guards were about to dispute him again when a feminine cry caught all of their ears: "Shishi-sama!"

Shimofuri leaned forward, sniffing the air and searching with his eyes as well as his heart. As he caught sight, smell, and sense of the approaching young woman his face lit up. "Tsukiyume!"

The hanyou girl ran to the grating and reached her thin, slender arms through it. The guards grumbled and stepped aside as the siblings reunited. Tsukiyume's ears shook with her excitement, her joy. "I thought I was never going to see you again!"

Shimofuri withdrew from her and threw a quick glare at the guards. Embarrassedly, they moved in and opened the gates, grunting with effort. As soon as the way was parted for her, Tsukiyume rushed forward, throwing herself into Shimofuri's arms and squeezing him tightly. He returned the gesture easily, sighing and laying his cheek over the top of her black-haired head. When she flicked her ears he pulled away, laughing.

"Have some control, Sister!" he reached out and tweaked her ears, purposefully mussing her hair as well.

She batted his hand from her before he could do much damage, and this brought Shimofuri's mirth to a close. He stared at her with his blue-gray eyes, caught between sadness and admiration. "You've grown."

"So have you, shishi-sama." She murmured. Then, at last, her gaze slipped past Shimofuri toward the horse and the armor-clad warrior behind him, waiting almost awkwardly…but after she stared at the warrior, she realized it was _not_ a man…

"Lady Rin?" she gasped, mouth falling open. Clumsily, the hanyou girl fell into a bow.

"Rin?" one of the guards by the gate grunted, squinting with new interest in the warrior woman's direction.

Uncertain, and acutely aware of their public environment, Shimofuri sprung into action. Moving forward, he reached out to drag Rin from her horse. Roba, the mare, spooked as he drew near. She whinnied and tried to rear. Rin hung onto her mane tightly, closing her eyes. Shimofuri snatched her from the saddle and set her onto the ground gently. "Come inside." He ordered, roughly. To the guards he shouted, "Bring the lady's horse and her things."

They nodded; appearing harried, and dashed forward to the panicking horse, trying to get her back under control. Shimofuri put Rin ahead of him and walked forward at a fast walk. Tsukiyume followed behind him, alarmed.

"Shishi-sama…?" she whimpered, ears flicking back and forth fearfully. "What is going on?"

"I will explain it to you, Sister, when we are safely inside with Uncle."

Rin, being pushed along ahead of him like a helpless refugee, slapped at Shimofuri's hands and twirled away, out of his grasp so that she could fall in line behind him, alongside Tsukiyume. Shimofuri's face was tight, caught between a glare of annoyance and one of worry as he broke free of his grasp.

"Lady Rin?" Tsukiyume stumbled, watching Rin with widened, innocent eyes. "What are you doing with shishi-sama?" and then she recoiled, as if Rin had slapped her. "You are…"

"Don't say anymore." Rin warned her, aware that Tsukiyume had at last caught her scent and realized that she was pregnant.

They walked through a courtyard. Decorated with low bushes and ponds full of magnificent, brightly colored koi fish. Stone pathways led up to the stairs and porch of the little palace that Sakaime housed.

Sasugainu was already sitting there, gazing in the opposite direction, out at the gardens. He turned his head as he heard the approaching footsteps and his mouth fell open widely. "Nephew? Tsukiyume?" his eyes landed on Rin and stayed there, flabbergasted. (A/N: flabbergasted! That is THE word of the day ladies and gents!)

Shimofuri led the way, ascending the small flight of stairs and bowing from the waist down to his uncle. "Lord Sasugainu. I have returned successful."

"I'll be the judge of that!" Sasugainu hissed, still gaping at Rin where she stood stiffly at Tsukiyume's side. He reached out and snatched his nephew's kimono by the collar, pulling him close so he could whisper to hide his words from human ears. _"Why is she here?"_

Shimofuri slapped his uncle's clawed hand away from him and stood up straight. "We will discuss this inside, Uncle."

Sasugainu had yet to remove his gaze from Rin's proud—although uncomfortable—form. "As you wish, Nephew. You have some explaining to do."

* * *

After the tea and the meals had been brought by the maids, Sasugainu irritably dismissed them all, even the guards hidden in the walls of the meeting room for protection. When all sounds had ceased and he was certain they couldn't be overheard, he turned toward Rin—which was unusual because he was seeking answers from a human woman to start off with—and demanded, "What are you doing here?"

Before the meeting, Tsukiyume had dragged Rin away to a changing room briefly and they had torn away her armor and her robes, giving her fresh, comfortable ones. The weather in Sakaime was warmer than Jouka had been, and now Rin was thankful for Tsukiyume's good taste. Her robe was thinner now, and she was sweating heavily in it. It took everything she had to keep up her composure, to face these new and different inuyoukai in their environment, to handle herself when she could clearly feel their mounting hostility.

"Lord Shimofuri was kind enough to pay me a visit and inform me of some things I was previously unaware of." She started, evenly, matching them for distance and coldness. Sesshomaru would've been proud of her, she mused bitterly.

"I'm well-aware of that!" Sasugainu growled, shifting on his haunches irritably. He turned his glare toward his nephew, who cringed slightly, anticipating the barrage of oncoming insults. "_You!_ Shimofuri, have you gone mad? You weren't supposed to bring her back with you! You've signed our death warrants!"

"Uncle—" Shimofuri spoke, trying to defend himself, but Rin interrupted him, and in so doing, dragged all of their attention onto her.

"Lord Shimofuri had no choice in the matter. _I made him_ bring me here." She glared between the two lords, radiating authority.

"Lady Rin." Tsukiyume murmured at her side, ears perked, eyes bright. The only human in the room overshadowed the youkai and herself, the hanyou.

"I've come here of my own will, and I will offer myself as a hostage against Sesshomaru." She continued, boldly.

Sasugainu's face had gone from bright red to pale as chalk. He turned from Rin to his nephew again; his mouth was open, exposing his fangs not with anger or rage, but with shock and fear. "The stupid bitch is _pregnant!"_

Shimofuri scowled, "Uncle, control yourself."

"You will _not_ speak of me like that." Rin hissed. Her hands were clenched in her lap; she leaned forward aggressively, snarling at the inuyoukai.

Sasugainu rose to his feet abruptly and began pacing stiffly around the small room. "She _cannot_ stay here." He announced, firmly, though his tone was a little wild. "Sesshomaru will hunt us down, he'll destroy everything…"

"I won't return to him." Rin interjected, obstinately. For the first time her expression wavered from strength, anger, and fierceness, to one of pain and fear. She looked between Shimofuri and Tsukiyume, neither of which met her gaze. "You can't make me go back. I won't." she watched Sasugainu's pacing, felt his feet and his body pass within a few scant feet of her backsides. "And _you…_how could you refuse my offer? Sesshomaru will be powerless…"

"He is a tyrant! He will tear us to bits and _drag _you back, stupid bitch!" Sasugainu roared, leaning over her. Spittle shot out, making Rin flinch. "That dog is _never_ powerless; he has never known even the meaning of the word! Only one arm and he can crush our bones with a single finger…"

"He can't _touch_ you if you have me!" Rin shouted, baring her teeth viciously, as if she were about to attack Sasugainu to make him shut up.

"What good are you? He has his inuyoukai bitch!" Sasugainu spat. He sat down near Shimofuri, glaring at his nephew. His shoulders shook as he spoke, "She's useless to him! The pup she's carrying now is hanyou! It's worthless to him!"

Shimofuri gazed at his uncle through dangerous, slitted eyes. "Hold your tongue, Uncle. You know not what you say."

"Lord Sesshomaru _does_ care for Lady Rin, deeply." Tsukiyume added in a small voice. Her ears fell backward as she stared between her brother, her uncle, and Rin. "I've seen his wife. He doesn't care about her. She's a tool to him. Lady Rin is the one he fights for, the one who matters to him…"

"Then that's even worse." Sasugainu scowled. "Shimofuri, you've killed us before we've even begun."

"He did nothing!" Rin shouted angrily, "It was _my choice…"_ she refused to be ignored by them, refused to be ignored as they argued, trying to make up their minds. "And you _will not_ send me back unless _I wish it."_

Sasugainu at last leveled his gaze at her, with a dangerous, murderous snarl. "Then _you_ have killed us."

"Silence!" Shimofuri bellowed. When all eyes had turned to him, and no one was bickering about who had sentenced who to death, Shimofuri tossed out his suggestion. "To keep Lady Rin out of Sesshomaru's grasps—and with that to keep _us_ safe—we will have to keep her somewhere that Sesshomaru will never think to look." He turned toward Rin, facing her directly, "You cannot stay with us, Lady Rin. Sesshomaru will know that you left with me; he will come after me first. He cannot scent you in my castle, even inside my lands. We must hide you."

"But Lord Sesshomaru is…" Tsukiyume shook her head helplessly, ears drooping pathetically. "He is unstoppable…"

"So am I." Rin shot back hotly. She directed her attention to Shimofuri. "I believe your suggestion is the best solution, Lord Shimofuri. I will go into hiding and you can hold that knowledge against him."

Sasugainu got to his feet again, stiffly. "I will not be apart of this."

"Maybe it's better that way." Rin sneered, but her voice was high and proud and untainted with the emotion her face clearly displayed. "We don't need you, and if Sesshomaru goes to you, then you cannot betray us and tell him where I am."

Sasugainu's face flushed red, his eyes were wide and wild, the whites were exposed brilliantly. "How _dare you…"_

"Uncle, leave." Shimofuri ordered, solemnly.

The older inuyoukai whirled on his nephew. "Have you lost your mind?"

"No, Lady Rin is correct about you. I will not force you to participate in this, and I will not reveal this information to you."

"I am your _uncle."_ Sasugainu growled, "You would listen to this _human woman's_ words over _mine?_" he gestured angrily at Rin, so violently that Tsukiyume at Rin's side flinched. Rin, however, remained statuesque, unfaltering. She had faced Sesshomaru's deception. She had lost her entire world. And now, with Sasugainu screaming and shouting and spitting at her, Rin felt nothing. "I am your _kin!"_ Sasugainu finished, ferociously.

"I trust that, if this matter came to war, you would have the honor to join me, Uncle." Shimofuri muttered, "But at the moment Lady Rin's words are far more useful than yours. You said you would not be apart of this. Leave."

Sasugainu was shaking as he walked for the door. He turned back as he slid it open, tossing over his shoulder one last thing, a prediction. _"You are making a mistake!"_

And then he was gone.

Shimofuri cocked his head as he listened to his uncle's angry footsteps pounding their way down the hall. When the distance was great enough, his gaze refocused on Rin and Tsukiyume and he cleared his throat, "Where, Lady Rin, do you imagine we could hide you that Sesshomaru would never find you…?"

"Another palace within the Middle Lands, perhaps?" She asked.

"No," Shimofuri's lips turned downward slightly as he fought off a frown. "Sesshomaru may already know that you've left with me. He will come into the Middle Lands and search me out first of all…" he paused, faltering slightly. "I am afraid that hiding you away and leaving that knowledge as leverage against him will not be enough to stop Sesshomaru."

Rin's lips were pinched into a tight, firm line. "You believe he will kill you anyway?"

Shimofuri shifted uneasily and avoided staring at her directly now. "I have seen the power of the inuyoukai spirit, I have felt it myself." He lifted his eyes to meet with Tsukiyume and the hanyou girl's chin quivered. She turned away, unable to meet his stare. "You are his mate and you are carrying his offspring. He will not search me out lightly. You will not only have harmed his pride, but his sense of _kin_ as well. It is one of the greatest affronts to an inuyoukai. I recall how his brother, just an inuhanyou, reacted when my mother foolishly threatened his mate and child…" his voice faded off as Rin's eyes widened and she opened her mouth to speak.

"Inuyasha."

"Yes?" Shimofuri asked, "What of him?"

"Inuyasha and Sesshomaru have fought one another many times." Rin explained quickly, "In one of their battles Sesshomaru lost his arm."

There was silence at her words as Tsukiyume and Shimofuri stared at her, trying to fathom what she'd said. Finally Tsukiyume whispered, "His missing arm…?"

Rin nodded darkly. "Sesshomaru has always been unable to destroy Inuyasha. He has tried many, many times. I believe his half-brother is his weakness."

Shimofuri had leaned forward, pensive and serious. "It would make sense. He is inuyoukai and it is within his instincts to want to protect _kin_, and Inuyasha is _kin,_ he may try to kill him and in the moment cannot."

"He insists that Inuyasha is weak, but—his _arm…?"_ Tsukiyume asked, gapingly. "A half-demon…" her ears were twitching, as if they were alive and possessed of their own spirit. They were excited about this news, twittering as if they longed to add to the conversation. To be told that Sesshomaru, the great and powerful ruler of the Western Lands, had lost his arm to his _little hanyou_ brother Inuyasha, it was quite a shock. It was also a shout-out to hanyou kind, belittled and hated as they were. Lopping off Sesshomaru's arm was a reputable deed. If Inuyasha had told them it was his doing they might've discounted it as bluster, but coming from Rin…

"Sesshomaru doesn't seek Inuyasha out, and Inuyasha doesn't call on Sesshomaru unless he has to—as he did when he was accompanying you, Lord Shimofuri." Rin continued, quietly. Her energy had faded, it seemed, since Sasugainu had left and the conversation was mostly peaceful again. "Sesshomaru would not think to search there at once."

Shimofuri nodded. "He would first find me, and then assume that I had hidden you elsewhere in the Middle Lands. He would probe my allies, Lord Arasoizuki in the Itou, Uncle in the Hokubo. But what would he do when he found all of these places without your scent, Lady Rin? Would he tear us apart? Would he search outside the Middle Lands?"

"He might remember Inuyasha then. He is aware that I have met Inuyasha before, but I doubt it would occur to him very quickly." Rin answered. She stared at her hands now lying uselessly in her lap. "He…" she swallowed nervously, "He could go to war, I don't know for certain."

Shimofuri scoffed disgustedly. "The brute would never get you back that way."

"You said it yourself, Lord Shimofuri." She murmured, "The inuyoukai spirit…"

A grim quiet swept over the room as the three contemplated their decisions, their recent actions, and the possible repercussions.

Tsukiyume broke the silence, ears and eyes scanning the room, back and forth between Shimofuri and Rin. "How will we get Inuyasha to agree with this?"

Shimofuri smiled openly and laughed, with sarcastic, wry mirth breaking through. "With a lot of cursing, as I recall."

Tsukiyume frowned. "I'm serious, shishi-sama. You will need to send a messenger, which will take days and—"

"There's no time for that." Rin interrupted, sternly. "You will come with me." She pointed at Tsukiyume. "We'll leave within the hour."

Shimofuri stiffened, frowning. "Now, wait just a moment Lady Rin…"

Rin turned to face him swiftly, flinging a long strand of her black hair over her shoulder with the rather sudden movement. "It is not much to ask of you, Lord Shimofuri. For my cooperation. _I am your willing leverage against Sesshomaru._ It isn't much to ask."

Tsukiyume's ears flattened, her face blanched. "Am I to be your hostage now, Lady Rin?"

"A hostage with a hostage." Shimofuri grumbled, scowling. "You drive a fierce bargain, Lady Rin."

"Tsukiyume will protect me when we travel, and when we reach Inuyasha's home." Rin insisted without hesitation. "It is perfectly suitable."

"Fine." Shimofuri waved his hand at her, dismissively. "Go, hurry, before I try to stop you." his eyes were on Tsukiyume, giving her a saddened, melancholy gaze. "I am sorry, Sister."

As Rin rose to her feet and moved for the door stiffly, as if her spine had changed from flesh and bone and nerve to steel, tin, and titanium, Tsukiyume hesitated, staring at her brother regretfully. "I'm sorry, shishi-sama. I've been nothing but a hostage since Mother died."

Shimofuri didn't answer her apology. Instead he watched Rin's backsides, her rich robes, her still lithe form. "I will see you again, Sister." Tsukiyume bowed to him and moved to follow Rin like a maid.

Rin slid the door open, but before she could pass over the threshold, Shimofuri called her name. The young, mortal woman turned back to face him; chin high, eyes cold and distant. Tsukiyume slipped past her and into the hallway, her eyes were too watery around the edges, she kept them downcast.

To Rin, Shimofuri said, "My thoughts will be with you, Lady Rin. Take care of my little sister for me."

Rin's jaw clamped down, tightening. The muscles there flickered, but she said nothing. A second later she broke their stare down and left the room, closing the door behind her with force.

Alone, Shimofuri sighed, letting his shoulders sag. Was this defeat he was feeling? Or simply a difficult, slow-coming victory?

* * *

A/N: The next chapter…

_Another man laughed raucously, stepping closer. "I always hated little rich girls with their fancy clothes and snob-faces. You ain't no better than any of the whores I've had in the brothel." He spat at her, but Rin flicked the blade, blocking the liquid projectile. _

_While she was distracted with this affront to her honor, the man that had taunted her about the sword raced in, reaching for it, trying to restrain her. Rin anticipated his attack,_ _ducking and whirling away from his grip. As the momentum of his charge forced him to stumble ahead of her and nearly trip, Rin slashed his backsides with her blade. The man howled with pain and fell flat, convulsing._


	15. A Monk, A Sword, and the Bandits

A/N: I celebrated a friend of mine's 21st birthday. Had a strawberry daiquiri. Fun fun. I have never been drunk before. Never. So as a result I can't even tell you if I have a "buzz." But I'm writing this after having had that daiquiri, so I'm hoping it has no effect on my writing…I highly doubt it will…At any rate, FYI I am in LOVE with Rin's character as I am writing this. I'm hoping this chapter will shock you and inspire you all in one.

Disclaimer: Kasai, Kohimu, and Tisoki are mine! Inuyasha is not.

* * *

Last Chapter: Rin left with Shimofuri after hearing what Sesshomaru's been up to behind her back. Sesshomaru headed back to Jouka sooner than expected and found Jijo, and after abusing her a little in his anger, he learned that she'd left with Shimofuri. He's gone after her. Rin and Shimofuri arrived at a border town Sakaime where they met with Tsukiyume and Sasugainu. Sasugainu refused to be involved with it, he's too afraid of Sesshomaru. Rin, Shimofuri, and Tsukiyume decided that Rin should hide for a time with Inuyasha because of all of Sesshomaru's enemies, IY is the one that took Sess's arm and because they believe Sessh is secretly unable to kill his half-brother. Rin has taken Tsukiyume as her hostage of sorts, and plans to leave ASAP for IY's estate.

* * *

**A Monk, A Sword, and the Bandits**

They walked, leading the packhorse behind them. It was the same old mare, Roba, that had made the journey with Rin from Jouka. Now that mare carried her things east and south, towards the ocean. As they passed over the tallest hills, Rin thought, if she squinted hard enough, see the blue flat of the ocean…but the distance played tricks on her, and the land closest to the ocean was flat anyway.

Her life had been spent traversing mountains with Jaken and Sesshomaru, or living in his palaces, castles, and battlements, staring out at them. She entered flatter, prosperous lands, skirting around the Middle Lands entirely and heading into the disputed coastal shores. Humans ruled over these parts, and random rebellious demons. It had bred the demon slayers, like Sango, and it had created the beast Naraku.

In five-hundred years this area would be Tokyo, home of Kagome Higurashi and her family's shrine.

Tsukiyume traveled ahead, partly because she was serving as Rin's protector, but also because traveling close would spook Roba. The road was well-traveled; the villages were clumped together and easy-going. The journey would almost have been pleasant, except for the fact that it became hotter and hotter the further they walked. The sun was beating down on them relentlessly. Tsukiyume shed her outer robes and had Rin tuck them onto Roba for her, but Rin herself refused to shed her rich robes. She walked stubborn and proud down the road, a sweaty little gem. It was impossible for anyone, human or youkai, to lay eyes on her and not see that she was royalty somehow.

It was, disturbingly, as if Rin were asking for trouble.

And trouble came, eventually.

As the path descended and narrowed, approaching a village, Tsukiyume scented a band of men hidden in the dense forest along either side of the path. The wind was faint, barely present, which meant that she had no advance warning or their presence. When she scented them she stopped, frozen, listening and searching with her eyes.

Rin was coming down the path behind her, slowly but surely. Her sandals, made of a rich, high-quality wood, and lacquered in gold, impeded her progress because she struggled not to slip out f them. Truly they were for decoration, not for wear and tear. Tsukiyume, in contrast, had chosen padded slippers, loose and flexible. "What's wrong, Tsukiyume?" she called, looking up and seeing that her "hostage" had stopped moving.

Tsukiyume's ears flattened, she took a step backward. "Lady Rin—bandits…"

Rin came to a halt at once, her brown eyes wide. Roba walked past her for a moment, not expecting her master to stop so abruptly. The mare nickered nervously, sensing the mood.

Nothing could frighten Rin, or at least that had been what Tsukiyume was starting to believe. She'd feared for months over whether or not Rin could even _survive_ the added loss of her trust in Sesshomaru when she found out about Ginrei, but since those fears, Tsukiyume had revised her entire image of Rin. Now she was uncertain of her friend, almost uncomfortable around her as she had been with Ginrei. Rin was like a machine, a thing operating without emotion. She revealed little bitterness, and no grief, as Tsukiyume would've expected her to. So far Tsukiyume hadn't had the courage to try and bring an emotional reaction out of her friend but she was starting to wonder if it was even there…

Yet, when she turned to stare back up the path at Rin, she saw, for the first time, _fear._ "Lady Rin?" she queried, uncertainly. "Are you all right?"

Rin made a small sound in her throat and swallowed hurriedly. Her eyes were unseeing as she turned, fumbling over Roba's bags until she found the sheath of a sword. When she drew it the sound rang loud and metallic, spooking Roba. The horse whinnied loudly and pulled free of Rin's grasp on the halter. She charged forward, looking as though she would run Tsukiyume over.

The hanyou girl screeched and bolted, leaping out of the way. The horse barreled past her and down the path a few short feet—and out from the sidelines, men appeared, big, brutish, and dirty. They shouted with what sounded like war cries. Three ran for Roba, blocking her way and snatching up the reins. The rest of them, about half a dozen, raced for Tsukiyume and Rin. Their eyes were alight, their mouths open and grinning cruelly.

Two of them came within ten feet of Tsukiyume and skidded to a halt, seeing, for the first time, that the white things on her head were moving and they were _her ears…_

"Demon!" they began to shout, "Demon!"

This cry didn't distract the other three men who converged on Rin. Their mouths were wide and leering, like animals Rin thought. She clutched her sword with both hands tightly and tried to block out an age-old fear that she'd barely known she possessed. _These are the type of men that killed my family…_

They surrounded her in a circle, cautious only because of her blade. They taunted her loudly, sneering and grinning. There was a hungry, malicious gleam inside their eyes.

"Good afternoon, pretty thing…"

"What's a fine little woman like you doing out here, all alone?"

"Isn't this just our lucky day, boys?"

Down the path, Tsukiyume was making false lunges at her would-be attackers. They appeared, from far away, to be involved in a dance. Tsukiyume feinted forward, the men backpedaled from her a step, then the men would advance, and Tsukiyume would retreat a step.

Tsukiyume brandished her claws for them to see, and curled her lips, hoping they saw the sparkle of her fangs in the sunlight. "I can rip you to pieces." She warned, ears lying flat.

"What are you waiting for?" the nearest of her assailants taunted, edging closer.

Tsukiyume took a deep breath and roared, charging headlong at him, claws at the ready. He was not fast enough to get away from her. Tsukiyume's claws tore him from shoulder to thigh and he fell away, screaming high and shrilly, dying. The other man gulped with fear and retreated further. A new, fresh fear started in his eyes, but it was intermixed with fresh, fierce hatred.

"Demon!" he shouted at her, baring his own blunt teeth.

As Rin lifted her sword up on the path, the men did not back away. Rin was clearly human, and the men would not be cowed by a mortal woman who happened to carry a sword.

"Where did a fussy thing like you get a sword, bitch?" one of them snickered, unimpressed.

Another man laughed raucously, stepping closer. "I always hated little rich girls with their fancy clothes and snob-faces. You ain't no better than any of the whores I've had in the brothel." He spat at her, but Rin flicked the blade, blocking the liquid projectile.

While she was distracted with this affront to her honor, the man that had taunted her about the sword raced in, reaching for it, trying to restrain her. Rin anticipated his attack, ducking and whirling away from his grip. As the momentum of his charge forced him to stumble ahead of her and nearly trip, Rin slashed his backsides with her blade. The man howled with pain and fell flat, convulsing.

The other two men backed away from her, realizing abruptly that her blade was not ordinary steel.

"A demon blade!" one of them choked. He looked down the path with wide eyes, hearing his companions fighting Tsukiyume and screaming a similar warning. "They're both demons!"

"Shut up!" the man who'd spat at Rin snapped quickly, "This one is just a spoiled little bitch, through and through." He moved forward, threateningly. "You think your little demon sword can save you?"

Before he could react, Rin rushed forward, plunging the blade into his stomach, viciously. The man screamed, pulling away frantically. Rin let him go, her face set in a tight, grim mask. The man fell flat, convulsing just as his companion had moments ago. Bloody foam escaped his mouth.

Rin leveled it at the last man facing her. "It's your turn now."

The man turned his back and tried to flee, but Rin lunged after him, cutting into him just barely with the blade. He fell at once, screaming and weeping. Rin walked past his shaking body, flicking the sword free of blood. She could feel the tenseness of her face, the stern, cold mask she'd adopted, but inwardly she was angry, she was raging…

The man trying to attack Tsukiyume was distracted by Rin's attack, her use of the demon blade. He backed away from Tsukiyume as Rin approached, and then he turned tail and fled. The rest of the bandits, trying to snatch the packs from Roba's backsides, looked up at his terrified cries.

Rin reached Tsukiyume and frowned at her angrily. "What's wrong with you? Why didn't you kill him? Stop them!"

Tsukiyume cringed at Rin's shouting, and when Rin moved the sword, she stepped back, full fear breaking out over her face. She looked like a beaten dog, expecting, at any moment, the next blow to land on her head.

"What's the matter with you?" Rin repeated, still angry.

But at that moment their involvement ceased to matter. Other humans were running toward them from the village. It appeared to be one grown man and three adolescent boys—but one of them, Tsukiyume noted, bore the aura of a youkai. And as they watched the small, strange group of people approach, one of the boys vanished—and then reappeared in the midst of the four remaining bandits.

The horse spooked at once, tearing free of the bandits' hands, dragging one of them with her in her panic. She raced down the path, only to be stopped by the approaching humans.

"What's going on?" Rin demanded, almost in a snarl. She stepped away from Tsukiyume fearlessly, holding the blade out to one side with only one hand. Tsukiyume stared after her, gawking. It appeared that Rin would take them all on, their strange rescuers, and the bandits. She was out for blood.

Roba had come to a stop down the path, held securely by one of the humans—a grown man dressed in dark robes and carrying a staff that gleamed golden in the sunlight.

Two boys slipped past the horse and the man racing forward as if to join the skirmish themselves. One of the boys fell on his knee and lifted a bow and arrow, taking aim. The other boy had a sickle-shaped weapon with a chain. He stepped to one side, avoiding the archery boy's sights, and lifted the weapon above his head, whirling it.

The real action was happening inside the circle of bandits, where the strange youkai boy had somehow transported himself. There were three bandits still, caught by surprise. The youkai boy kicked the feet out from under one and then, as the other two lunged for him, he disappeared from beneath their grasping hands, letting them fall onto their faces. He reappeared next to the fourth bandit, the mane that Roba had dragged behind her a short ways. This man was only barely recovering from his fall and the subsequent dragging. The youkai child reappeared in a crouched stance and rolled into his legs, knocking the bandit over.

The boy with the bow at last loosed his arrow. It flew out and shot through the calf of one of the recovering bandits. He fell, bleeding and clutching his leg. The others were shouting, starting to run.

The boy with the sickle let go of it, sending the weapon out to skid in the dirt in front of the able-bodied, retreating men. It missed them, but made them stumble backwards, cutting off their retreat. The boy with the arrows had notched another and shot one of them through the thigh.

The man who had stopped Roba had mounted her and was racing forward on the path now, spurring Roba on fiercely. The archer and the boy with the sickle moved aside at once for the horse, shouting at him with what was probably encouragement. Roba raced toward the youkai boy and the bandit she had, moments ago, dragged over the ground. Now the youkai boy curled into himself, as if about to be trampled, but he vanished instead, leaving only a tiny puff of dust or smoke.

The man on Roba's back rode by the bandit that the youkai child had left struggling to get to his feet and whacked him in the back with his long, golden staff. The bandit finally fell and lied still. Roba's rider spurred her at the last able-bodied bandit.

Anticipating his fate, the man began to run back up the path—and straight to Rin. His eyes bugged out as he realized how close she had come to him during all of the other commotion. Frantically, he tried to duck, to fall, to disappear into thin air like the youkai child had—but he had no such luck.

Rin slashed with her blade, barely catching the man in the arm. He stumbled backward, crying out, and then, as with all the others that had fallen to her blade, his eyes rolled back into his head, his mouth fell open. He collapsed into the dirt, convulsing violently, choking on his own saliva.

The man on Roba brought the horse up short. The world fell silent around them, except for the sounds of the moaning bandits and the dying gurgles of the last man that had been unfortunate enough to meet up with Rin's blade. Roba was breathing hard, her eyes were wild and rolling, her nostrils flared, but the man on her back pulled tightly on her reins, controlling her and keeping his distance from Rin.

He was human, Rin saw, through and through. A young man still, but older than her by at least a decade. His hair was black and straight, his eyes a startling violet. His clothes were the robes of a monk and the staff he'd used as a weapon jangled where he grasped it in his fist. When he spoke, she identified his voice as smooth, clever, and educated. "My lady—I believe this horse belongs to you."

Rin lowered her sword to her side, but she didn't sheath it or drop the blade, and ominously, blood still dripped from the tip. "Who are you?" she demanded.

The man slid off Roba's back, patting the horse's rump as he did so. "My name is Miroku." He turned his back on her, looking over his shoulder to the boys behind him who had taken up defensive positions, guarding the still conscious, living bandits. "Tisoki! Bring me as many of those bags as you can."

A little voice piped up, groaningly. "Why, Dad?"

"Because they belong to this lovely lady." He replied and turned back sheepishly to Rin, blushing embarrassedly. "My apologies, lady, I do not know your name or…" his gaze drifted to her sword and his face briefly creased with suspicion or wariness. "…what brings you to these parts?"

Rin wrapped the fingers of her free hand around Roba's reins, pulling the horse away from the monk. The mare whickered uncertainly, lifting her head fussily away from Rin because she could smell the stink of blood around her master, on the sword. "I'm traveling." Rin answered, vaguely.

"That's an interesting sword." The man began smoothly, cautiously. "May I inquire as to its origins?"

"You may not." She answered, coldly.

He blinked, taken aback, but didn't fight her on it. "Well then…" but at that moment a huffing, red-cheeked boy appeared behind him, hauling some of the bags and chests that the bandits had pulled from Roba's back. "Ah, thank you Tisoki." As the boy set the things down, breathing hard, Miroku ruffled his hair affectionately, making the boy bristle and step backward.

"Hey!" He grumbled, but his expression of annoyance faltered and disappeared as he took in Rin and, behind her some distance, Tsukiyume. His face flushed red and he bowed clumsily. "My lady."

Rin watched the boy for a moment, her eyes and face softening. The boy was handsome although very young; he couldn't have been older than eight or nine years old. He had brownish straight hair and bright, intelligent brown eyes. His outfit was tight, designed for physical exertion. The weapon he'd used, a sickle, was tucked into his belt. It was too big for him, sticking out at an awkward angle.

"Lady Rin!" Tsukiyume called, her voice hushed, almost breathless. "This is…"

But Miroku had already started to put two and two together. He had never seen Rin as an adult, and never would've guessed that he would cross paths with Sesshomaru's grown child-ward from long, long years ago. But Tsukiyume he recognized and remembered, even as he squinted through the sunlight and realized that the hanyou girl had grown as well. Taller and stronger.

"Lady Tsuki…" he frowned, struggling to remember her name correctly. "Lady Tsukiyume." He thumped his staff with his fingers, thinking hard. He knew of Rin's name, but couldn't connect exactly how…

Rin at last glanced back at Tsukiyume, "You two know each other?"

Tsukiyume nodded and began to walk forward, cautiously however—she didn't want to spook Roba again. "I know this monk. He is friends with Inuyasha."

Rin laughed once, short and sourly. "Coincidence."

"Forgive me," Miroku interjected, bowing slightly, "I know Lady Tsukiyume, but I am afraid I do not know you, my lady. And I must ask, what brings you to these parts?"

Rin ignored him and walked around Roba's backsides, searching for the sheath to her sword. When she couldn't find it she noticed the long, slender shape among the things that the boy, Tisoki, had brought for her. Carefully she approached the boy and knelt, trying to smile as she took the sheath.

Miroku was watching her, tensely. "Tisoki, come stand next to me."

The boy hopped up and joined him without question, but he had eyes only for gawking at Rin and her every movement, as if she were some sort of angel or a huge fireworks display on a holiday. When his son was safe, and after Rin had sheathed her sword, Miroku cleared his throat and asked, stiffly, "You carry a demon blade, my lady."

Rin ignored him, tying the sheath and its sword onto her belt as best as she could. The monk was right, it was a demon blade, one of the newest that Sesshomaru had made for her. It was Hikitsuru, a demon blade designed to act as poison, to kill its victims, especially humans, with only a slice. She was not about to tell the monk about it. The blade served its purpose and nothing more. It took life, it drew blood, it protected its owner.

Tsukiyume had come as close to Roba as she dared, and fallen into a bow. "Houshi-sama, I ask on behalf of myself and Lady Rin that you take us to Lord Inuyasha's residence."

Miroku's face blanched. "Oh no, what has he done now?"

"We are coming to ask Lord Inuyasha for asylum."

Miroku blinked. "Asylum?" he repeated, like a parrot, oblivious.

"We're wasting time." Rin muttered, staring at the dirt. One hand rested on her sword's hilt, the other over her still mostly flat belly. She let her eyes drift closed, her shoulders sagged. "We should go, Tsukiyume."

"Wait!" Tisoki cried, rushing forward toward Rin, escaping his father's frantic, grabbing hands and whispered protests. He wrapped his arms around Rin's legs and stared up at her with his large, seemingly innocent brown eyes. Except for the sickle in his belt, Rin might've thought him mistaking her for is mother. But what he said as he stared up at her was, "Will you marry me, pretty lady?"

Miroku smacked himself in the face. "Please, my lady, ignore him…"

There was a shout from the other two boys, the youkai and the other human, who were still standing watch over the moaning bandits. "Tisoki!" one of them was saying, "She won't marry you!"

The other added, "You're too ugly!"

* * *

In spite of Rin's growing desire for haste, she and Tsukiyume joined with Miroku and the children, walking into the village. The monk explained that they had hired themselves out for a few months to act as a police force against bandits who frequented the passes coming out of the Middle Lands and toward the coast. The increase was because of refugees, easy pickings, cast out of the Middle Lands by war and feminine and death. The bandits picked off the survivors as they passed through, robbing, raping, and murdering. They'd tried, unsuccessfully, to add Rin and Tsukiyume to their long list of victims.

"Why would you bring your children out here?" Rin demanded, almost with anger, when she realized that the two human boys were this monk's _sons._ She was appalled at the thought that this man risked his sons' lives in such a way.

Miroku answered her calmly, "They are apprenticing themselves to my wife as demon slayers. This is the right age for them to begin training." As he stared ahead at his sons, his violet eyes glazed over, full of memory. "My wife was a renowned slayer when she was only a teenager. The best in her village."

Rin thought she detected sadness in his voice, so she asked, "Has something happened to your wife?"

He blinked and threw her a blank look. Then he grinned, "Oh, you think I lost my wife, don't you?" he laughed, full-throated. "I'm sorry, Lady Rin, the only thing wrong with my wife is that she hates being pregnant."

Frowning, Rin looked away, focusing instead on the boys, the youkai child, and Tsukiyume walking up ahead. The human boys were talking together animatedly, whispering, while Tsukiyume and the youkai boy were conversing peaceably. Tsukiyume kept one ear pointed backward, listening for Rin's voice.

"I'm afraid the journey to Inuyasha's home will take at least another day's walk, my lady. Could I perhaps invite you to stay with my family through the night?" Miroku was asking.

Rin hardly heard him; she was too busy straining her ears, trying to hear what the boys were saying. They were talking about Tsukiyume, pointing at her ears, her hair. "I'm afraid I'm in a hurry." She told him, distractedly.

"Please, my lady? You have traveled a great distance already, and the attack…"

Rin at last turned her full attention on him, frowningly. "No, I'm afraid I must insist that Tsukiyume and I continue without stopping to Inuyasha's estate."

Miroku pursed his lips, withdrawing from her. His staff jangled musically with each step that he took. "What is so urgent that you and Lady Tsukiyume are seeking out Inuyasha?"

"It is none of your affair." Rin replied, coldly. Then she pulled on Roba's reins, pushing the mare to one far side of the path, and raised her voice to Tsukiyume at the head of the troupe. "Tsukiyume!"

The hanyou girl reacted at once, turning and hurrying away from the youkai boy she was talking to and plowing through the giggling boys and the gaping monk. "Lady Rin?"

"We're going on alone." To Miroku and the others she said, "Thank you for your help."

Miroku nodded, "Make no mention of it." when he faced his boys again he gave them a quick order, making them step aside and allow Tsukiyume and Rin to pass by with Roba.

They waited, resting together on one side of the path, watching the strange hanyou girl and Rin pass deeper into the coastal territory, closer to Inuyasha.

When there was no chance that the hanyou girl would overhear them, Shippo turned to Miroku solemnly. "I don't trust them. I think we should warn Inuyasha and Kagome."

Miroku nodded, tapping his staff as he thought. "Did you learn anything from Tsukiyume, Shippo?"

The kitsune nodded. In the years since Naraku's death, he'd grown out of his childish shell, into a more adult, mannish form. He would always be short, but now he was a valuable fighter, with the growing strength of a full-blooded youkai. His green eyes were bright with intelligence, his babyish face had leaned out and matured somewhat, he was beginning to appear handsome. "She said she's spent the years since we last saw her as Sesshomaru's hostage."

"Hmn." Miroku murmured, "That makes your stories from the Isei true, Shippo."

"You mean why that Shimo-guy turned the Isei province over to Sesshomaru?"

Kohimu and Tisoki were listening now, intently. When they heard Sesshomaru's name they grinned and Tisoki said, "The asshole uncle!"

Miroku scowled disapprovingly. "Who told you that? Sesshomaru _is not_ your uncle."

"We know." Kohimu informed him, slinging his bow and arrows off his shoulders and sighing, relaxing as he realized that they were going to be sitting in one spot for a while. "He's Koinu's asshole uncle."

"So you learned this from Inuyasha." It wasn't a question anymore, but both boys nodded. Miroku grunted, unimpressed. "I'm going to have to have a talk with him."

Shippo shrugged, smirking. "C'mon, Miroku, what can you expect from him?"

Miroku gave a short, dry laugh. "Maturity—he's got to get it _sometime."_

"Guess again." Shippo grinned.

Miroku narrowed his violet eyes and lifted one hand, shielding them from the sun. He was staring after the backsides of the horse, Rin, and Tsukiyume. "Who do you think Lady Rin was, Shippo? How does she play into all of this?"

"I dunno." The kit answered, cocking his head to one side and following Miroku's gaze, as if the distant, retreating forms could expose some answer to their question. "But she shouldn't be traveling."

"Why not?"

"She's pregnant." Shippo answered, wrinkling his nose. "And its father wasn't human."

Miroku remembered the blade, the convulsing, gagging bandits, and Rin's strange distance, her coldness, her cruelty… "That doesn't surprise me."

"Yeah—but the scent was inuyoukai—like, like…" the kit's voice trailed off, his green eyes widened, his mouth began to fall open, gawking as his scent memory at last gave him the answer he was looking for: _where have I smelled that inuyoukai before? It smells like Inuyasha but…not…_

"Like what, Shippo?" Miroku asked, calmly.

"Like Sesshomaru." The kit breathed, still staring.

"Asshole uncle!" Kohimu and Tisoki chorused together, snickering.

Miroku rose to his feet, wearing a new, grim face. "Up boys—let's get going!"

Kohimu grumbled and reached down for his bow and arrows, slinging them again over his shoulder. "I was just getting comfortable, Dad!"

"Where are we going?" Tisoki asked, eagerly.

"We're going to pay Uncle Inuyasha a little visit…"

* * *

A/N: And the next chapter…

_Rin lashed out, knocking the bowl away, sending the chopsticks flying. Rice, sauce, noodles, meat, strips of vegetables, everything splattered over the floor messily. Rin ducked over, folding herself in half. Her long hair cascaded forward, covering her face and dipping itself in the spilled, wide-flung food. _

"_Everything I am, __**he**__ made me." Rin was gasping; her words were barely understandable over her hoarse, ragged breathing. "Tsuki…" she breathed coarsely, "My babies…he told me I was being poisoned. What if __**he**__ did it…" her words dissolved into choked sobs and wailing, teary cries. _


	16. Carnage

A/N: I had the craziest dreams last night. I dreamed I had a beard, like beard as in Gimli-beard. LOTR beard…icky. And then I dreamed that a gay guy my boyfriend and I both know, who has hit on him before (he asked him to come over and spend the night for a pair of pants my boyfriend wanted to buy, to which my boyfriend asked, "Can I bring my girlfriend?" and he said, "Forget it then.") started hitting on him hardcore…and then my boyfriend fled to me embarrassed and…well, it was all disturbingly real. That's what I get for going to bed at 5 in the AM…

BUT anyway, how do you like it? Rin's a tough girl, eh? But she's not all badass, as I am about to show you…and what of Sesshomaru? He has reacted with amazing swiftness…

* * *

Last Chapter: Rin and Tsukiyume were attacked by bandits. They defended themselves well, though Rin did it with particular vengeance and bloodlust. We all know she has multiple reasons to be a little off her rocker…A monk, 2 boys, and a youkai child tried to come to their rescue. This happened of course to be Miroku, Kohimu, Tisoki, and Shippo, acting as vigilante police against an insurgence of recent bandit activity. Rin and Tsukiyume joined them for a time, but left. Shippo put two and two together and now they are eager to warn Inuyasha of the approaching trouble—and of his unborn niece…

* * *

**Carnage**

A small village appeared at a turn in the bend. Tsukiyume stopped when she saw it, ears swiveling. Rin was some distance behind her, walking Roba. The sky was darkening with twilight, the sun was setting. To Tsukiyume's rich hanyou senses, the air felt charged with electricity. A storm was brewing, a rich, pounding rainstorm.

When she heard Rin's footsteps, and Roba's hooves crunching the dirt, she turned around, facing the other girl uncertainly. "There's a village ahead, Lady Rin."

Rin didn't look up. "Good for them."

"We should stop." Tsukiyume insisted, watching tensely as Rin drew closer, still leading Roba onward. The mare was snorting, disliking the closeness of Tsukiyume's feral scent.

"No, we keep moving." Rin ordered, but she could not disguise the fatigue in her shoulders, in the slump of her posture, in the weary circles underneath her eyes.

"My lady, please." Tsukiyume started backing up, trying to keep a safe distance from Roba. "You aren't in the condition to…"

"Don't speak of it." Rin interrupted, harshly. She glared at the hanyou girl, her lips tight, her expression bitter.

"But we must stop! You cannot walk through the night like this, my lady…" giving up on Roba, Tsukiyume stepped forward and snatched Rin's arm where she held the reins, trying to stop her or pull the horse away from her. "Please, _Rin…"_

The use of her name without official titles startled Rin and, as if seeing Tsukiyume for the first time, she stopped, blinking unsteadily. "If you insist…" she stuttered.

Roba whinnied, jerking on the girls' hold on her, trying to flee instinctually from Tsukiyume. The hanyou irritably tugged back on the halter, ears lying flat. "Shut up—you're more trouble than you're worth."

Rin laughed, short but with genuine amusement. A weak smile spread over her lips. "You said just what I was thinking."

* * *

When Shimofuri arrived in his preferred battlement in the Nanka province of the Middle Lands at around noon the day after Rin and Tsukiyume had left, he knew upon entering that he'd waited too long. The small city around his castle was solemn, mourning the dead. At first Shimofuri sensed the atmosphere and thought that an earthquake or a storm had passed through, but when he saw the damage he quickly realized that no _natural_ phenomenon had swept through his city.

Surprisingly, his castle was undamaged. The guards greeted him with stony, stunned expressions, saying little. Shimofuri learned more when his advisors and retainers flocked to him, frantic but apologetic. They spoke of an attack in the town, throughout the countryside as well. An inuyoukai, fair-haired, golden-eyed. The denizens of the Middle Lands had come to know inuyoukai over the other types of youkai. They had also learned to distinguish the different clans that ruled over them. This beast they knew wasn't apart of the clans that ruled over the Nanka. His features, and the fact that his power was turned against them, told them that well enough. They knew of Inutaisho only out of collective group memory, that he'd been fair-haired like Taikokajin, but not blue-eyed or pink-eyed as a true albino. The golden-eyed inuyoukai was an entirely different breed…

Shimofuri's retainers, of course, knew their attacker to be Sesshomaru because he had come and announced this, demanding to see their ruler. When they'd told him that Shimofuri was away—at some unknown location at the time—he'd left, seemingly defeated. That was when the attacks started. Not on the palace, but on the people.

All of this had apparently taken place the evening before; at around the time that Shimofuri had watched Tsukiyume and Rin leave for the coastal lands and Inuyasha's home there. Sesshomaru had behaved as they'd predicted, rushing to the one responsible in his mind for having dragged Rin away. When he hadn't found trace of either Shimofuri or Rin, he'd taken out his frustration on the people, beginning his first punishment on Shimofuri.

"Send out my messengers." Shimofuri ordered his advisors, "And the spies as well. I want to know where Sesshomaru is and what he's doing. Alert my uncle and Lord Arasoizuki of this incident."

"What should the messengers say?" a wide-eyed, fox demon asked Shimofuri. He was one of Shimofuri's hired messengers. "Are we to search for Lord Sesshomaru? And if we run into him, what do we say to him?"

Shimofuri scowled, jaw clenching. "Yes, seek Sesshomaru out. If you find him, tell him he is asked to come and speak with me, diplomatically…" for the messenger's sake, Shimofuri hoped they never did run into Sesshomaru. It would probably be the last thing they ever said.

* * *

The villagers were understandably uncertain about their newest guests. A dog-eared girl and a rich woman with her packhorse traveling alone? They muttered and doubted even after Rin paid them twice the amount of money their meager lodgings were worth. But for that kind of money they accepted her wishes and provided them with a meal. When Rin and Tsukiyume sat together inside the small hut they'd been given, they could hear the villagers gossiping. The pitter-patter of their children's feet scurrying around the side of their hut sent Tsukiyume's ears continually circling, trying to pinpoint the sounds.

Finally she snapped, growling to herself. "How does Inuyasha stand it? All the gawking…" unlike her distant cousin, Tsukiyume had spent her entire life until recently hidden away from prying eyes, first by her mother and brother, then by Sesshomaru and Rin.

Rin was focused on her meal, though she didn't eat with any vigor at all. The chopsticks moved slowly from her bowl to her mouth and then the process repeated, but each time it seemed to take longer for the journey to be completed. She didn't answer Tsukiyume's question, and seemed deaf to the boys trying to peek at them outside.

Tsukiyume's ears flattened dangerously. She looked between the door and Rin, frowning. "Can you even hear them, my lady?"

"Don't call me that anymore." Rin murmured, softly. The chopsticks poked into her mouth, and then, gradually, she pulled them free and let them drop to the bowl again.

"What do you mean?" the hanyou girl scowled.

"I'm not royalty, Tsukiyume." Rin answered, still speaking gently and quietly. "Sesshomaru made me _appear_ as if I was." Only at the end did her words become embittered and nasty.

Tsukiyume scowled. "You are Lady Rin." Her tone made it sound as if she were trying to convince Rin that the sky really was blue. It was obvious to her, Rin was a lady, she _was_ royalty. She hadn't been born into it, no, but she was as fair as any samurai warlord's wife or daughter, and certainly more educated.

Rin's face twisted briefly as she fought with her chopsticks, forcing her meal to stay caught in them. "Do as I say." She might as well have been talking to her food, Tsukiyume was beginning to think her human companion had gone mad.

"How can you command me if you _aren't_ royalty?" Tsukiyume demanded, growing irritable.

At last Rin lifted her eyes away from her bowl and the chopsticks. "Because you are hanyou." She spat, viciously. "Hanyou have no place in this world."

Tsukiyume's ears fell backward, her eyes narrowed. As Rin turned back to her food and continued her slow, laborious path from bowl, to chopsticks, to mouth, Tsukiyume's hands clenched tightly into fists. At last she blew, like a volcano, losing her top.

"What's the matter with you? If you think taking out your anger on everyone around you is going to help you feel better, you should take a look in the mirror! The only thing you're doing is making everyone else miserable right alongside you!" she shouted, snarling.

Rin didn't even glance up at her. "If you are miserable it is nothing of my doing."

Tsukiyume groaned, covering her face with her hands, pressing at her eyes. Caught between rage, fear, and pain, she didn't know whether to scream, curse, or bawl. She pulled her hands away from her face and leaned forward, closer to Rin, invading her personal bubble all in one fluid movement. "I worried about you _every day_ I was stuck with Ginrei! _Every day!_ And now you insult me for being _hanyou?_"

There was a flicker of interest in Rin's gaze now, but it was still as if she were barely seeing Tsukiyume, as if there was a shroud over the hanyou girl and Rin were watching her from a distance. It was like a personal drama before her, played out on a stage that was so close she could reach out and touch it, or pinch its white dog ears…

"So that's Sesshomaru's new wife, is it? Ginrei…" Rin said, blandly, tasting the name with more interest than she gave to her food.

Tsukiyume got to her feet stiffly, hands still balled into angry fists at her side. "Do you know who you sound like, _Lady Rin?"_

Rin looked up at her, unconcernedly. "Who would that be?"

"You sound like _your mate._ You sound just like _Sesshomaru._" She pivoted, facing Rin more directly to scowl down at her, angrily. "Hanyou have no place in this world. Isn't that what you always said he told you, over and over again? Well congratulations, _Lady Rin,_ your baby is _hanyou._ She'll be right here with me—and you can make her miserable too."

Rin had lowered her eyes now, though whether it was to actually hide them because she was having an emotional reaction to Tsukiyume's words, or whether it was simply because she'd lost interest in the speech and decided to try eating again was completely unclear. Tsukiyume was about to storm out and shout at the boys, who were still racing around the hut, trying to eavesdrop—not that it was hard to do currently—when she saw Rin's shoulders jerk once. This made her pause, watching the mortal woman a moment longer…

At last, Rin cracked.

It began in her shoulders. They quaked, looking as if she were laughing. And as the sound reached Tsukiyume, she thought Rin had lost her mind, because it _sounded_ like laughter at first, hard, chest convulsing laughter. (A/N: that's something strange I've noticed. While sobbing really hard, it can actually sound like laughter. It's really like a sick joke…)

But then Tsukiyume scented the salt of the tears and saw Rin's fingers go limp, dropping the chopsticks.

"Lady Rin—Rin, I'm sorry…" Tsukiyume stammered, dropping to her knees and reaching out for her, but Rin knocked her hands away fiercely.

A snarl curled itself over Rin's face. She looked up into Tsukiyume's face and the hanyou girl moved away, blown backward by the hatred she saw awakening inside her friend's face. "Rin…" she whispered, gapingly.

"How could this happen?" Rin choked, hands balling up into fists, "I'm such a _fool!"_

"It's okay," Tsukiyume stuttered lamely, "I know you didn't mean it—and I didn't mean a word I said either…"

Rin lashed out, knocking the bowl away, sending the chopsticks flying. Rice, sauce, noodles, meat, strips of vegetables, everything splattered over the floor messily. Rin ducked over, folding herself in half. Her long hair cascaded forward, covering her face and dipping itself in the spilled, wide-flung food.

"Everything I am, _he_ made me." Rin was gasping; her words were barely understandable over her hoarse, ragged breathing. "Tsuki…" she breathed coarsely, "My babies…he told me I was being poisoned. What if _he_ did it…" her words dissolved into choked sobs and wailing, teary cries.

"Rin, no—that's not true! Sesshomaru wanted those babies as much as you did! Ginrei meant nothing to him! All he ever did was pick on her and fight with her and…" Tsukiyume moved forward, awkwardly trying to comfort Rin once more, but Rin heard her movement and sat up, scooting away.

Tears streaked down her face, her eyes were bright red and inflamed. "I could _kill_ him…" and then, as soon as she said it, Rin's hands flew to her abdomen and she shook her head helplessly. "But I _can't…everything I am…"_ she repeated, sobbingly.

Tsukiyume kept her distance now, stiff and carefully composed, although her eyes were very wet and she was blinking ferociously. "I'm sure right now Lord Sesshomaru is regretting everything, Rin. I'm sure he's ready to kill anyone that stands in his way…" the hanyou girl cut herself off, putting one hand over her mouth and closing her eyes tightly. _Shimofuri…_

Rin sobbed onward, unaware of Tsukiyume's presence or her pain. "Sesshomaru has what he needs." Her face rippled with self-loathing and hatred for her mate mixed as one, ugly expression. "And it's not me. I am only _weakness._" She looked up at Tsukiyume, abruptly shouting, "How could he go to her when he knew I was always waiting for him? How could he look at me?" she hugged herself, rocking back and forth and whimpering, gasping. "He probably laughed." She whispered to herself, eyes wide and unseeing. "He enjoyed it all…"

Tsukiyume shook her head desperately. "_Please, please stop this!_ You're only hurting yourself, Lady Rin. You must be strong!" her ears flattened, a few tears escaped her own eyes but she flicked them off of her. "For your baby!"

"Even _that_ is _his."_ Rin snarled, viciously, still rocking back and forth, back and forth.

"Not anymore." Tsukiyume murmured. "Now she's yours."

"He doesn't care!" Rin spat.

"He does." Tsukiyume repeated, calmly. "He spent months with you, Lady Rin. You can't believe your own words, you're heartbroken. Please, stop, for your baby?"

Rin's breathing had stabilized some, her rocking had ceased, but in spite of it she shook her head firmly. "She won't live, none of them ever do." She choked on the words again, lowering her head to hide her eyes.

"You've been traveling all this way, my lady, and she is still alive, isn't she? I've seen you flinch when there's nothing wrong—she moves, doesn't she?" Tsukiyume had begun radiating hope and confidence to bolster her failing mistress. "What will you name her?"

Rin scoffed bitterly and began sobbing again, but this time it was with less violence, though it at last robbed her of her breath, making her give up on speech. As Tsukiyume saw Rin's body shaking, her long hair dirtied from being dragged through the spilled food on the floor, she sighed, recognizing that the worst was over, for now. She didn't try to stop these tears; some tears were unavoidable and actually needed for cleansing. Instead, she moved about the room trying to clean up the bowl Rin had tossed aside, snatching up the chopsticks as well. And searching for a comb. She acted like a maid, serving her lady.

The familiarity of the ritual made Rin give in to it, sitting up, sniffling, and allowing Tsukiyume to pick through her hair clumsily with the comb. They did not speak—neither risked an exchange, for fear of what it could do to them both.

As night at last descended the villagers brought bedding supplies for them, which Tsukiyume accepted and then unrolled, setting them up for sleep. Rin stayed quiet, having once more retreated into her cold, distant façade, protecting her fragile innards where she'd been torn wide open and split like an egg.

* * *

Sesshomaru arrived in the eastern province of the Middle Lands—the Itou—at about the same time as Rin and Tsukiyume faced the bandits on the road. The sun was shining brightly; the temperature was soaring, showing the first true signs of spring. The Itou was flourishing, its people populated the fields, clearing out the debris from their irrigation channels. They planted rice in preparation for the next growing season.

They were unaware that their world was about to be shaken from the top-down.

In the castle town of the Itou province, a city called Sobadzue, Lord Arasoizuki was summoned by his flustered, confused servants, telling him that the great Lord Sesshomaru had appeared, demanding an audience.

Arasoizuki was a young inuyoukai still, only freshly married. He had two children from his recent marriage already, both sons. Arasoizuki was a gentle leader, he preferred to avoid and evade wars as much as he could. While Nishiyori had plotted against Shimofuri and before him his mother Lady Taikokajin, Arasoizuki had contented himself with finding a suitable bride and bedding her to ensure his legacy, through his heirs, would continue on.

When the war in the Isei had started, both Nishiyori and Shimofuri had come forward, pleading with Arasoizuki to ally himself with them. Arasoizuki hadn't been interested. He proclaimed neutrality and held it, stiffly. His lands, at the time, had been devastated by a typhoon that had swept up over the eastern coast and been caught in the rain shadow of the mountains further west. Most of the Middle Lands had suffered in that growing season because of that misfortune, except the Isei, which was part of the reason why Nishiyori had gone to war when he did. He'd known that all the other provinces but his own were weakened by famine and hardship.

Arasoizuki had been no exception, and so he saw it prudent to avoid the conflict, which he saw as silly anyway.

This day he would rue not having joined the battle on Nishiyori's side.

He stepped into the audience room, after being announced by his retainer, Boujin, and was surprised to see Sesshomaru sitting there. The inuyoukai was calm outwardly, but Arasoizuki's instincts flared up, setting his pulse racing, although he had yet to understand why. There was something in Seesshomaru's posture, something in the position of his single hand in his lap—and the rather dirtied, travel-worn kimono and hakama that he wore—that set Arasoizuki on edge.

Even as he walked into the room, Shimofuri was arriving back into his castle and sending out his messengers to the Itou and the Hokubo provinces, to warn them of Sesshomaru's likely hostile intentions.

Arasoizuki had entered the room without a blade.

He settled himself on his platform, grunting as he sat. Sesshomaru, in the center of the audience room some ten feet away, did not bow. Arasoizuki decided not to make a matter out of it. Sesshomaru was intimidating, he'd heard many things and knew the inuyoukai to be powerful and to hate the clan. He wondered, innocently, what had brought the old heir of Inutaisho's estranged line into his audience room without any warning or prearrangements.

"Good day, Lord Sesshomaru. I hope you are well." Arasoizuki began, warmly. He had a smooth voice, a voice meant for diplomacy and peace. In another decade Arasoizuki might balloon in size and become fat to match his easy-going sound. "May I ask you what brings you here so soon in the spring?"

He'd only met Sesshomaru briefly, when he had newly inherited his position as lord of the Itou. It had been over fifty years ago, when the panther tribe was invading the Western Lands again and Sesshomaru had still been apart of the inuyoukai clan. Sesshomaru had asked each of his distant relatives for aid, and each had turned their backs on him. He ruled the single-largest swathe of land of any leader in the clan. They had decided, unanimously, to test Sesshomaru's mettle and leave him to fend for himself. They hoped it would weaken him and they could step in later to help and divide his lands up amongst their squabbling children and the lesser inuyoukai families that longed for their own rule and land.

Unfortunately it had only worked to estrange Sesshomaru from the clan and garner his lasting grudge. Arasoizuki hadn't been opposed to helping Sesshomaru in those days, but he _had_ been new in his position, vulnerable. He needed to support the clan t have them support him, so he denied Sesshomaru's requests for aid just like all the rest of the clan.

Now Sesshomaru was back, and there was something in his golden eyes, a strange, brooding darkness…

"I have come, Lord Arasoizuki, to ask what you know about Shimofuri's involvement in the abduction of my mate."

Arasoizuki blinked, stunned. His mouth opened but no words came out. "I'm afraid I have heard nothing, Lord Sesshomaru. Forgive me; I was not even aware that you _had_ a mate…"

"You are Shimofuri's ally." Sesshomaru spoke in a deadly calm voice, cold enough to make Arasoizuki shudder as if a blizzard had suddenly started inside the room. "You knew of his plans."

"I'm afraid Lord Shimofuri and I are not on the closest of terms. They are angry with me for remaining neutral in the war within the Isei." He bowed slightly, starting to sweat, "I am genuinely sorry for your loss, Lord Sesshomaru. If there is anyone that will know Lord Shimofuri's mind, it is his uncle, Lord Sasgainu. They are very close allies." He tried to make a joke laughing, "I would call them mates if it were not in such poor taste."

When Sesshomaru failed to react at all to his bad joke, Arasoizuki cleared his throat nervously. "As I said, I'm afraid Lord Shimofuri has told me nothing. Is there anything that I can do for you, Lord Sesshomaru? My men are at your disposal to help you find your mate."

"You have already given me what I need." Sesshomaru answered him, ducking his chin in what at first glance appeared to be a bow, but in the space of an eye blink it became a deadly, fatal move. Sesshomaru lashed out with the green glow of his energy whip. The snakelike thing wrapped itself around Arasoizuki's throat, coiling tightly. As Arasoizuki cried out and the guards in the room sprang into action, swords as well as bows and arrows at the ready, Sesshomaru turned, whirling like a child's spinning top. His projected green whip moved with him, dragging Arasoizuki around the room. Sesshomaru used his body like a club, knocking aside all of the guards and the retainer, Boujin.

Their bodies all flew through the air, crashing with enough force to smash through the screened walls of the audience room. Sesshomaru released the coils holding Arasoizuki then, letting his inuyoukai club fall unceremoniously at his feet.

Arasoizuki was still alive, though he was choking and gasping for breath. He clutched at his neck with shaking hands. The flesh of his neck was searing, smoking, and oozing the same green color as Sesshomaru's whip. He recovered swiftly though, seeing that Sesshomaru was not finished with him yet.

"Sessho…" his voice was all but destroyed by his trip flying at the end of the other lord's whip. He stumbled backwards, beginning to pant. The energies of the room swarmed as Arasoizuki, in desperation, began to call on his true form.

Sesshomaru drew the sword at his belt with his single hand and held it level as Arasoizuki's face erupted in a canine snarl. His eyes blazed red; he dropped to all fours…

Without a word, Sesshomaru slashed the air with his blade, sending a lightening-like bolt of energy ripping through the floor. It tore apart the wood floor of the audience room, cracking it and making the entire castle tremble warningly. It was preparing to collapse in on itself, destroyed from the inside out by Sesshomaru.

The streaking energy cut into Arasoizuki's changing body, ripping him limb from limb. The stink of blood pierced the air sharply. As the floor collapsed, Arasoizuki's human guards and retainers cried out, falling into the chasm that was opening beneath their feet. Arasoizuki suffered the same, fate, but he did it in pieces. A leg fell through an early crack there, an arm or a hand through a different crack on the other side of the room. Blood dribbled and cascaded downward like a waterfall.

Sesshomaru, through sheer force of will, remained where he was, defying gravity as the floor fell out. When the roof above him started to crumble as well, Sesshomaru let loose another crackling, streaking bolt of energy, this time aimed upwards. It cut through the floors above him, straight into the ceiling. The castle crashed around him, collapsing into itself in a way that would not be mimicked until the skyscrapers of the 20th century.

Before the dust had settled, and as the shrieks and wailing cries of the mourners and wounded had only just started up, Sesshomaru set foot back on the ground and paused, staring at the carnage. But his golden eyes weren't seeing it. They were hazy, unfocused. As if on autopilot, he sheathed his sword, and turned his back on the mess at last, vanishing for a time into the countryside of the shocked Itou.

They would begin their own mourning soon enough. As he passed through the villages, Sesshomaru took the time to stop and tear one apart every so often, almost randomly. His eyes held the same darkness that Rin's had, and alongside his normal distance and chilly personality, Sesshomaru had adopted a stifled rage. He was driven to carnage, to vengeance; as if these things could alleviate the pain he felt, the sense of _loss…_

They didn't. He left each scene of disaster even more calloused than he had been before, and even more _helpless…hopeless…_

He crossed the Itou and entered the Hokubo before dawn. He did not stop to sleep and would not stop until a sign had been given, until some scent, a shred of hope…

At one time in his life he had thought all humans smelled the same. Only Inuyasha's mother had left an impression on him previously, and that had only been one of hatred. But now, after raising Rin, there were other humans, and there was _Rin._ Rin was not one of them. She bore a scent unlike any other, a scent so deeply ingrained in him, that he knew as he passed through each province, that she wasn't hidden within their borders. Her scent had become more than a scent; it had become a _sense,_ an aura that he could follow as surely as he could track the moon, the sun, the starlight…

The Middle Lands were bereft of that, empty, as good as barren wastelands in his eyes. Wildernesses of darkness, stretching out into infinity…

Arasoizuki and the Itou were behind him, that left the Hokubo and Sasugainu, Shimofuri's closest ally.

* * *

Rin awoke in the night, doused in her own cold sweat. She shivered, trying to dig herself deeper into her blankets. Tsukiyume was snoring quietly on the other side of the room, seemingly asleep and unlikely to waken.

Alone, in the darkness, Rin felt herself starting to crack again. Her body flushed hot beneath the blankets, in spite of her sweat. She shivered, her stomach tightened and she gagged, nearly vomiting.

Closing her eyes and taking deep breaths steadied her body, and helped to solidify her emotions, but it didn't rid her of the pain completely.

_Where are you?_ She wondered to the darkness. Laying one hand over her belly, she delicately probed her own feelings regarding her child. _Are you his? Are you mine? Will you even survive?_ The questions were unanswerable.

She missed his touch, the deep purr-like sound, the chest rumble, that he made during their moments of intimacy. Her body and mind craved him, quaking inside and out at the thought and the memories. He was like a drug, and she couldn't deny her ongoing desire for him, so strong it was a _need_ that drove her slowly mad as she went without him, as she suffered withdrawal.

Whimpering weakly, she pressed her face into her beddings, letting a few tears come. _What do I do without you? Everything I have you gave me. I'm nothing without you…_

* * *

A fox demon crossed Sesshomaru's path. It cowered and bowed and tried to pass on a message. Sesshomaru held himself in check long enough to understand that the little youkai was a messenger working for Shimofuri, and that the arrogant dog was trying to summon Sesshomaru to him, to try "diplomacy…"

"There was no use of _diplomacy_ when _he_ took _my mate…"_ Sesshomaru snarled, eyes flaring red through the darkness of the night.

The kitsune glanced up in time to see the eerie green glow of Sesshomaru's clawed fingertips. He screamed, turning away to flee, but Sesshomaru was faster. He let his noxious poison fly, spraying after the kitsune. It covered over the helpless creature, leaving him to scream with pain as the acidic poison carved the flesh from his bones while he was still living.

Sesshomaru spared him this agony by drawing his sword and releasing another burst of energy, cutting the kitsune up, at last killing him.

His journey now included run-ins with Shimofuri's messengers frequently. He scented them and often crossed paths with them. Sometimes, without reason, he tracked them down and killed them wordlessly, other times he allowed them to speak their messages, and then he would slaughter them. Other times he would pass their scents and not pursue them at all, merely continue on his own journey like a mindless drone.

At dawn, as he came to the bordering forest around Sasugainu's castle city, Funuke, Sesshomaru came across one last kitsune messenger. This one was taller, lankier than the others, and his scent was stronger, more powerful. He would be at the head of Shimofuri's messengers; he would be the favored inside his clan, more powerful than the others.

This one, apparently wise to the fact that Sesshomaru had been murdering his kin and companions, kept his distance, skirting through the trees. He was ash-gray, making him fit in very well with the surrounding forest, especially in the twilight of the sunrise. And his voice had the uncanny ability to echo, throwing off Sesshomaru's keen ears and confusing him.

"Sesshomaru." The fox called. As far as Sesshomaru could tell, the kitsune youkai was a hundred feet away, to his left. The kitsune had left out titles, ignored the altogether.

He drew his sword, narrowing his eyes coldly at the trees all around him. "Speak." He ordered, almost growling.

"Shimofuri calls you to the Nanka." The messenger's voice hissed through the trees—Sesshomaru caught a shadow moving between the trees fifty feet away from them to his far right.

Without hesitation, Sesshomaru whipped his sword in a wide arc, sending a flash of light through the trees toward his right, where he'd last seen the fox. The energy crackled and pulsed, pushing ferociously through the woods. The trees snapped and broke into tiny pieces, there fresh spring buds burning up in the blink of an eye. Charred bark tumbled down around Sesshomaru. A wide swathe of blackened ground stretched out ahead of him—and no sign of the fox.

He wasn't dead, Sesshomaru understood that. The forest was silent, but Sesshomaru could _feel_ the fox's presence. "Show yourself."

"Your mate came with Shimofuri willingly." The fox's tone had lowered, darkening, and the echoes had increased, making Sesshomaru turn around, his sword lowered and ready for action—but there was no sign of his enemy to be had.

His words were different from all of the other messengers'. This was genuinely insulting, this made Sesshomaru's stomach tighten and his face wrinkle with a stony hate. He didn't answer the kitsune's taunting, and refused to let himself think about whether it was true or not.

Light from the sun shot through the trees, dispersing the shadows and the mists slightly. Sesshomaru squinted, adjusting to the light. A shadow flashed by on his left side, in his peripheral vision. He whirled in that direction and slashed at once with his sword. The trees burned, exploding on impact. The earth rumbled a little, as if feeling the loss of life.

But the fox wasn't gone yet. As the smoke cleared and the new sunlight revealed the twisted, deformed and charred shapes of the trees, nothing but ghosts of their former selves, Sesshomaru saw no evidence that this blast had caught the fox. He bared his teeth with mounting frustration, clenching his jaw. "Show yourself!"

"You kill my clansmen for their message calling you to be civil when it is _you_ alone that is to blame for your mate's choice."

He caught the fox's form, and saw with astonishment that it was no longer in human form. It was a large red-colored fox, cowering, slinking through the trees, stumbling and stunned.

Sesshomaru moved forward stiffly, his senses alert.

The fox in the distance tripped over its own legs and fell in a heap. Sesshomaru could see its body shivering, quivering.

The voice came again, echoing and deep, challenging him. "You choose this, Sesshomaru. Shimofuri merely took advantage of it. You go on this tirade, slaughtering…" the fox's voice changed, becoming lighter, higher, and shrill, "What did you think you accomplished with slaughter?"

Sesshomaru stopped, frowning briefly. The fox spoke with Ginrei's voice—was it telepathic? Kitsune were tricksters, it wasn't beyond the realm of possibility…

He lunged forward, moving with the great speed of the inuyoukai. The trees flew by him; the lump of the fox's body was abruptly at his feet. It struggled, trying to get up, and when it raised its head, it stared at him with wide, dull brown eyes, unthinking and panicked…

Sesshomaru froze, realizing that this was a normal fox, a mortal fox. It was injured from his blast with his sword. It was bleeding, and likely dying.

It was with a great, alarming jolt, that Sesshomaru realized there _was no_ kitsune. It was his own brain at work here, feverishly constructing an enemy aside from the forest; somewhere he could vent his frustration and rage…

"_You are a monster."_ The voice laughed, still echoing through the trees, but now he recognized it as _his own voice,_ taunting him.

Sesshomaru sheathed his sword and growled—but as he made the sound, something snapped inside him and the rage and pain rose to the surface. His growl became a roar of anguish, and midway through it formed a distinguishable word, or rather, a _name:_

"_RIN!"_

* * *

"_Sesshomaru…"_ Rin was curled into a fetal position, with her face still pressed firmly into her bedding, stifling the words, muting the sounds of her tears—as well, she hoped, as the scent. _If you come after me, if you find me…I would never have the strength to turn you away. _

She could feel a tug on her insides, deep in her guts. It was as if Sesshomaru had a rope tied around her heart and, somewhere out in the darkness, he was tugging on it, trying to reel her in like a fish at the end of his line. It was like lopping off limbs to Rin, trying to resist it.

* * *

_I will kill them all. _Sesshomaru vowed as he moved at a fast walk, through the charred forest around him, the forest he had massacred while chasing a self-induced kitsune youkai. Smoke rose from beneath his shoes as he crunched over the cracked, blackened earth. _Until you are returned to me, they will know nothing but death._

The voice of the "kitsune" echoed in his mind: _Your mate went willingly with Shimofuri._

It couldn't be true. Rin had been tricked in some way; deceived…she would never betray him like this, never leave with another demon that she knew to be a potential threat or rival to him. _Shimofuri could use her against me, she knows this…_

_Rin, how could you betray me?_

* * *

A/N: The next chapter…

_Shippo plunged into his story, spilling it out hurriedly, as if afraid of more interruptions at any second. "Me, Miroku, and the boys ran into these two women—"_

"_Okay, who asked who to marry them this time?" Inuyasha snorted, smirking. "Wait, I don't wanna know unless it was Miroku and he got beaten by Sango for it." _


	17. Forewarning

A/N: woo go me…out of curiosity, I used my online translation website to see if I could translate Sesshomaru's name, just to see what, if anything, it would tell me about his character and maybe what his parents were thinking. This is what I got

Se: Area of measurement/current, torrent, shoal, shallows, rapids

Sho: various, many, several.

Maru: circle (money, zero), circle, full month, PERFECTION, PURITY.

So…uh…what do we make of this? I heard someone once translate it as, "Endless killing circle." Or something like that. I like the translation I can pull out of this one better: _Sesshomaru (se-sho-maru):_ A lot of raging perfection.

Rin, meanwhile, means: Phosphorous, cold, COMPANION, counter for wheels and flowers (?).

And Inuyasha (Inu-yasha): dog, female demon. Wow…gender confusion? Somebody stop me! Too much fun!

Disclaimer: Nooooo

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Last Chapter: Rin and Tsuki stopped at a small village for the night. They fought with each other, and then Rin broke down. Sesshomaru attacked and killed Arasoizuki, the ruler of the Itou (Eastern) province of the Middle Lands. He attacked Shimofuri's people in the Nanka (southern province), but didn't meet with Shimofuri yet. He kills the kitsune youkai messengers he runs into. One spoke very candidly to him, and Sesshomaru realized he was hallucinating the fox up out of thin air.

* * *

**Forewarning**

If Kagome didn't get home in a matter of seconds, Inuyasha decided he would rip his fuzzy white dog ears out. It would be painful, but in the moment, Inuyasha decided that it was a better path than going deaf at his daughter's bawling.

Akisame was angry, and she wasn't afraid of letting her father—and everyone else within a thousand miles—hear about it. When Inuyasha scooped her up and tried to cuddle her, his daughter beat his chest with her little clawed hands; she pulled on his hair, and tried to snag his ears. He tried to offer her some of her favorite foods. Ninja snacks from Kagome's era: chocolate pudding, celery sticks with peanut butter smeared over them, gran-ola bars, but nothing satisfied Akisame.

When Inuyasha scolded her and tried to sit in the opposite room from her, trying to ignore her as punishment for her tantrum, Akisame's screaming changed from unintelligible bawling to actual words. All of them were impossibly high pitched, and all of them were shrill enough to make Inuyasha regret not having been born deaf. He stuffed some of Kagome's socks in his ears, but that didn't work well enough to drown out his daughter's howling.

Her problem was simple, but it was one that Inuyasha just couldn't cure: she wanted Kagome and Koinu, and she wanted them _now._

Koinu had never given his parents this problem. There were two reasons for this. The first one in Inuyasha's mind was that Koinu was more like Kagome in nature. As strange of a conclusion as that was; it was undeniable. Koinu might've looked exactly like his father, but he possessed a lot of their mixed and evened traits. Akisame had her mother's dark hair and facial features, but she had her father's eyes and her father's crabby temperament. The other, simpler reason, was that Koinu had been an only child at this age. His parents had never split the family apart and left Koinu with one parent for any length of time.

Kagome had left several _long_ hours previously to take Koinu to the doctor. Inuyasha had fought with her, feeling it was a waste of time, of course. Kagome had insisted that the appointment was made and it was for Koinu's own good. The pup wasn't sick; it was for a shot, a prick in the arm with a needle. The idea alarmed Inuyasha, but Kagome insisted that it was actually a preventative medicine. Inuyasha dismissed it as "mainland shit" like acupuncture. Akisame, unaware of their more intellectual battle, reacted on a simpler basis: _Mom and Big Brother are missing. _Without them her world wasn't whole, it was incomplete.

She would bawl as long as it took for that to change.

"_Maaaaaaamaaaaa!! Kooo-nuuuu!!"_

"Dammit." Inuyasha muttered, pacing up and down the hallway outside the sitting room. He was out of sight of Akisame, sitting and screaming in the middle of the sitting room. The hanyou was a comical sight, agitated, arms crossed, and two long white socks stuffed in and tied around his ears. They hung down, trying to get in his eyes, and looked suspiciously feminine, like hair ties.

Out in the sitting room, Akisame was screaming again, beating the floor with her very angry, very tiny wrists. _"Maaaamaaaaa!!! MAAAMAAaaaa!!"_

At last Inuyasha's tolerance ran dry. Stomping into the room, he stood threateningly over Akisame and tried to speak to her, growlingly. "Aki—your mother isn't going to like you screaming! You're going to be in trouble when she gets home!"

This sort of threat had often worked on Koinu. Akisame didn't even bat an eye.

Turning her back on her father, Akisame used the table in the sitting room as a crutch, pushing herself neatly into a standing position. She toddled away from Inuyasha and toward the kitchen and the front door. That was where she'd last seen her missing family members. She was old enough to understand, roughly, how to open the door. If left unsupervised, she would slide the door open and walk right out into the gardens.

Being the overprotective father that he was, Inuyasha wasn't about to let that happen. He followed Akisame, frowningly, waiting and watching as she approached the door. "Aki—you're going to be in trouble!" he warned again, helplessly.

This time his daughter stopped and turned around clumsily to stare up at him. Her crying lowered in its pitch for a moment as she stared up at him with her amber eyes, which were currently red-rimmed and very wet. Her nose was running as well.

Inuyasha grumbled and slipped his hand inside his sleeve, ducking down to wipe her nose the moment he caught sight of the snotty mess. "Aki…"

His daughter slashed at him, fighting his touch. When he withdrew, scowling at her with mounting frustration, she stared at him pointedly and then opened her mouth wide to resume screaming.

"Aki—don't…" he growled.

She screamed anyway, ignoring her father. _"Maaaamaaa!! Koooo-nuuuu!!"_

And then, abruptly, the front door rattled. Akisame collapsed onto her backsides, twisting around to stare at it. Her crying had stopped completely. She sniffled and pawed at the air, gesturing. "Dahdah…"

"Sure, _now_ you stop, _now_ you want me to help." Sighing, Inuyasha rose up out of his kneeling position and hurried for the door. "Just come in…" he called as he reached for the sliding door. But as he pulled it open, he saw a panting, rosy-cheeked Shippo, not his wife and son as he'd hoped. His shoulders sagged immediately.

"Shippo?"

"Inuyasha!" the kit coughed fitfully, "I ran the whole way to beat Miroku!"

The hanyou blinked at him, baffled. "What are you talking about?"

Shippo's face twisted, almost mimicking Inuyasha's confused gape. "What did you do to your ears?" he squinted his green eyes, starting to grin, "Are those _Kagome's socks?"_

"Feh!" Inuyasha snarled, backing away from the door and snatching the aforementioned socks out of his ears. Undefeated, the furry white appendages sprung up merrily, though their owner was anything but. "_You_ try dealing with _that!"_ he pointed to his sniffling daughter, staring at them both with wide, currently innocent amber eyes.

"Oh, soon I think she'll be the _least_ of our problems."

Inuyasha had walked over and gathered Akisame into his arms. She didn't fight him now; her attention was focused on the newcomer. Like Inuyasha she could have a short attention span and, if properly distracted, she could be made to forget her big beefs. Now her father easily wiped her snotty nose, sighing with relief as Akisame grabbed hold of his haori, accepting his hold on her. Her eyelids were beginning to dip tiredly.

"Did you hear me, Inuyasha?" Shippo asked, barely noticing the fact that his semi-surrogate father was deeply absorbed by cradling and cuddling his little girl.

"Nope." Inuyasha brought Akisame back to lean against his shoulder and turned his back on Shippo, walking past the kitchen, the sitting room, and into the hallway beyond. Shippo hurried after him, determinedly.

"Inuyasha! You have to listen to me!" he called, trailing the hanyou as he entered the master bedroom, the one that he and Kagome shared. Shippo hesitated at the door out of respect and habit. He had accidentally disturbed the couple in this room many, many times. As a result he associated the room with beatings, and over the years he'd taken to keeping clear of it, letting Inuyasha and Kagome have their privacy. "Inuyasha?"

"What?" he snapped, irritably, "Can't you see Aki's _finally_ shut up? She's going to sleep…" Inuyasha had settled onto the bed he shared with Kagome, resting Akisame on his chest and stomach. They made a peaceful couple, a remarkable turnaround from moments before when his daughter had been clawing and hitting him.

"_Inuyasha!"_ Shippo stamped his foot, "Just listen! While I was out with Miroku and the boys—"

"Yeah," Inuyasha grunted, cocking one ear at Shippo curiously, "Aren't you supposed to be with them? What are you doing back here so soon?"

Shippo rolled his eyes, "I was about to tell you!"

"Then quit going on about it and tell me already!" Inuyasha settled into the cushions on his bed, letting his eyes drift shut. He stopped all movement except for the steady motion of one hand stroking Akisame's black hair.

Shippo plunged into his story, spilling it out hurriedly, as if afraid of more interruptions at any second. "Me, Miroku, and the boys ran into these two women—"

"Okay, who asked who to marry them this time?" Inuyasha snorted, smirking. "Wait, I don't wanna know unless it was Miroku and he got beaten by Sango for it."

Shippo groaned, ignoring this interruption and skipping straight to the point to catch Inuyasha's attention. "One of them was that hanyou girl, Tsukiyume."

Inuyasha's ears perked up, then his eyes snapped open. "Say what?"

"You know, a few years ago, the hanyou girl you brought with you? When that pink-eyed inuyoukai had Kagome and Koinu and—"

"Yeah." Inuyasha interrupted the kit's rambling, "Of course I remember that." He paused, staring at Shippo carefully, lips pursed tightly. "You saw her on the road?"

Shippo nodded solemnly. "Her, and this other woman that she called Lady Rin."

Inuyasha cocked his head against the pillows, raising an eyebrow. "Lady Rin?"

"Yeah, Lady Rin and Tsukiyume." He leaned forward, lowering his voice as he got to the best part of his story, "This Rin woman was pregnant—"

"With Sesshomaru's kid?" Inuyasha interrupted, unimpressed.

Shippo's chest deflated somewhat. "How did you guess?"

The hanyou rolled his eyes. "I've met her before."

"Oh." There was a pause as Shippo thought this latest news over and then frowned, "But how did you know…"

"Feh." His face colored a little and he turned his eyes to the ceiling. "She was living with the bastard. His mate, I guess. Stupid hypocrite." When he glanced back at Shippo he saw that the kit was still unsatisfied with this explanation. "Okay, so I have a nose, remember?"

Now Shippo's mouth opened up widely in a silent "O" shape. "I get it now."

"So are you telling me this just cuz you thought I'd be shocked that Sesshomaru was having sex with someone or what?" Inuyasha was frowning, annoyed as well as embarrassed by the topic.

"No!" Shippo squeaked, shaking his head at once, "I was telling you this to warn you! Tsukiyume and this Rin lady are coming _here_ to talk to _you…"_

Inuyasha's ears flattened at once, his frown deepened distastefully. "Great." He growled. The last time Rin had come to him it had been to tell him that Sesshomaru was going to kill him. Why would she be traveling to talk with him now, while pregnant?

He opened his mouth to tell Shippo something else, but the words were lost as the sound of the screen door opening reached Shippo, Inuyasha, and Akisame all at once. The hanyou's ears pricked up, Shippo turned his head to look down the hall, and Akisame sprang wide awake and sat up on her father's chest like a dog startled out of its dreams.

"Inuyasha! We're home!" Kagome's voice floated cheerily down the hallway, "And we brought ice cream for everyone!"

* * *

Sasugainu had been unable to sit still for days. From the moment he'd laid eyes on Rin, he'd understood his mortality with such acuteness that he felt frail, weak as an old man. He turned away his advisors and retainers, ordering instead that his spies be sent out, searching the countryside for word of a rogue inuyoukai.

With uncanny speed they found it and word trickled into Sasugainu within hours of his spies having left his castle. A demon, great, fierce, and powerful, was wreaking havoc on the surrounding provinces, all except the Isei. Sasugainu stayed awake all night, listening one by one to the stories his spies returned with. Each hour brought a new story, a new horror, and more detail to haunt Sasugainu's mind.

The once proud inuyoukai lord stayed in his personal chambers, not eating, not sleeping. He stared ahead like a statue, but this statue sweat in thick, sticky, and cold beads.

Reports of Arasoizuki's death and the destruction of his castle and the Itou's countryside flooded in. It was as bad as Sasugainu had feared. In a rampage, Sesshomaru was exacting revenge, using collateral damage as well as frontal assaults that killed the inuyoukai rulers of the Middle Lands themselves. His advisors and retainers thought that the world had descended into madness, but Sasugainu understood otherwise. This was a simple matter that Shimofuri had started. The only way that it could be settled was to give Sesshomaru what he wanted without any reservation at all.

This thought was the only one that comforted Sasugainu, even though it was tentative. It hinged on the questionable idea that Sasugainu could get Sesshomaru what he wanted, appeasing his frantic rage, and it also relied on the assumption that Sesshomaru was not mad with the loss of his mate.

Sasugainu tended to believe that Sesshomaru was less enraged than he was _insulted_ by the loss of the human woman. At least, that was what he prayed.

By listening to the reports of damages and loss of life over time, and over the distances between the provinces, Sasugainu calculated that at about dawn two days after he'd seen Rin with Tsukiyume at the border between the Middle and Western Lands, it would be his turn to see Sesshomaru. His estimation proved to be off only by a few hours. Sesshomaru arrived and demanded an audience just after dawn, in the early morning hours. Sasugainu was at once completely ready to see him, and completely ready to throw himself on his own sword to save his honor.

His retainers assembled and slipped into the audience room, bowing and trying to introduce Sasugainu with all of the usual pomp and fuss. Sasugainu pushed past them, refusing to wait. When they gawked at him stupidly, Sasugainu snapped for them to be silent. He faced Sesshomaru with every last ounce of courage he possessed, stiff and doused in chilled sweat.

"Lord Sesshomaru. Let us skip pleasantries. I know why you've come, and I am here to tell you that I had _nothing_ to do with it!"

Sesshomaru moved his head slightly, as if perhaps surprised, but when he spoke, Sasugainu felt his limbs weakening; draining of strength, to hear what might've been amusement in his voice. "Really? It was my understanding that you are actually Shimofuri's closest ally."

Sasugainu sat back, rocking on the balls of his feet, as if about to spring or fall over, though which wasn't clear. His retainers were tense, twitching, watching the strangest exchange they'd ever seen and would ever see. "Shimofuri and I are allies, I won't deny it, Lord Sesshomaru." He tried to bow, but stumbled, nearly doing a face plant instead. He continued onward with a shaking voice, "He's my nephew. I am bound to him beyond my control! Surely you can understand that?"

"What do you know about his plans?" Sesshomaru demanded, skipping right to the heart of the matter. He had his head lowered, partially shielding his eyes from Sasugainu's view, another very negative sign.

"I'll tell you everything I know." Sasugainu sputtered, pathetically, blurting his words out in a rush, "That fool decided to take revenge on you! He stole his sister away from you and when his spies told him that you weren't with her, he went to your mate and told her about the bitch we gave you—as you requested from us…"

"And he abducted her?" Sesshomaru asked, his voice dropping, growing tighter.

Sasugainu sensed that the right answer would be _yes,_ and so, like a lab rat to please its masters, he nodded frantically, "Yes! That fool took advantage of her in her grief and in her condition…" he cut himself off, aware that Sesshomaru's hand in his lap had clenched up into a fist. He started again hurriedly, but on a different tangent. "And I saw her and I told him I would have nothing to do with it! I said he was killing all of us!"

"Tell me where I can find her." Sesshomaru murmured, speaking very quietly now, almost dully.

"I…" Sasugainu frowned, leaning forward desperately. "I don't know Lord Sesshomaru." He ducked into a bow hurriedly, mumbling in a rush against the floor, "When I left them they were discussing a place to hide her! They wanted to hold her against you, my lord!"

"You do not know where." Sesshomaru had inferred this vital information already. He sat still as a stone, waiting for Sasugainu's answer.

"No, Lord Sesshomaru!" his voice had grown higher, shriller, as if he were about to begin pleading shamelessly, "But I willingly pledge myself to you, to help you until you find your mate and this terrible wrong against your honor has been reversed!"

There was a thick, heavy silence. And then, at last, Sesshomaru asked, "Would you kill your nephew, Sasugainu?"

The other inuyoukai looked up, bluish eyes wide and terrified. "I…" he stammered, feeling the sweat pouring down his face, dripping occasionally onto the floor just beneath his face. "I pledge myself to you, Lord Sesshomaru! I would punish Shimofuri for this wrong he has committed against you…"

"Would you kill him?" Sesshomaru repeated, lifting his head now, narrowing his golden eyes like a hawk, zeroing in for the kill, the moment before its talons closed over the helpless creature below it, crushing and piercing it, spilling blood.

Sasugainu's fingers, his shoulders, his knees, everything was shaking. But as he drew a last deep breath, this quaking weakness ceased and his body stilled. When he spoke again his voice had cracked, becoming hoarse, but unwavering. "No, I cannot kill my own kin."

Sesshomaru sat back, staring at Sasugainu more openly now, and a glint of sanity could be seen in the quirk of his lips, the release of the tension in his jaw. "You are not lying to me." it wasn't a question, but rather an observation.

Sasugainu realized, suddenly, with a slow, prickling sensation over his skin, that he had passed a test. If he had lied and told Sesshomaru that he would kill Shimofuri, his own nephew, Sesshomaru would've known that Sasugainu had allowed fear to taint him, and that would make him an unreliable ally and witness. The truth was what had been needed in this case, and Sasugainu, only by his sheer luck, had passed. He risked breathing a little faster again, risked letting his body relax slightly.

"I am yours to command, Lord Sesshomaru." He said, bowing yet again.

Sesshomaru dipped his head insubstantially. "Send out your spies; find where Shimofuri is keeping her."

* * *

The village that had once been home to Lady Kaede and Kikyo, was gradually flourishing. The rice fields were expanding, the villagers' numbers were increasing. In their long years they'd seen the appearance of the Sacred Jewel, the powerful priestess Kikyo killed and then reappear, they'd seen her reincarnation as well. They'd endured attacks by all manner of youkai and survived. They'd accepted the hanyou Inuyasha into their midst, and seen him turn on them seemingly without provocation.

Now their prospering little town saw a second hanyou and the lone, rich mistress that accompanied her, leading their packhorse through the huts. Most of them were in the fields, pulling the early weeds out of the irrigation channels and laying down the rice and other crops for the growing season. Their huge sunhats made them look like giant mushrooms that had sprung legs and begun to take up agriculture as a serious hobby. They glanced up at the travelers eventually, and, seeing that they were unusual, kept staring, blinking and squinting.

No one mistook Tsukiyume for Inuyasha, she was both the wrong gender, _and_ she had dark hair. The darkness of her human-like hair only served to accentuate the whiteness of her fuzzy dog ears, making them stand out. From faraway she might've looked as if she were wearing bright white ornaments, but anyone that looked for any length of time could see them swiveling, and from there it was easy for them to realize that she wasn't just a human girl. In every other way she was normal, nothing to gawk at. Her clothes were messy, stained a little by blood from the bandit attack the day before, and they were of poorer quality than what she had worn while she was with her brother or in Sesshomaru's care.

Rin, meanwhile, drew more stares than Tsukiyume did at first, even from faraway. At a distance, the colors of her robes, and their exquisiteness, were very apparent. She was like a jewel that had slipped out of a miner's purse onto the roadside. She was unexpected. Up close she became less extraordinary. Her face was smudged with dirt, she didn't smell fragrantly of fine perfumes, her robes were scuffed and dirtied by the journey and, on the sleeves, by human blood.

As they passed through each village along their journey, Rin kept a tight clutch on her sword, Hikitsuru, which she'd tied onto her obi. Her over robes hid the sword from searching eyes, making her appear to be a strange, unprotected princess on the road without any male escort. She stared straight ahead, but she could feel the heaviness of their eyes with each step.

The last village on their journey was no exception. People lifted their heads, wiping the sweat from their brows, and found their eyes caught by the bright, lavish colors of Rin's robes. Purple outer robes embroidered with pink and white water lilies, a baby blue inner kimono with a gold dragon curling its way from her hips to her calves.

Nervous field workers slipped away, with their pant legs rolled high to avoid the irrigation water. Tsukiyume's keen ears heard them speaking of _demon women,_ and of calling Inuyasha to their aid.

Her ears flattened down against her dark hair and she slowed, letting Rin catch up to her a little, in spite of Roba's warning grunts. "They're going to get Inuyasha." She murmured when she was sure Rin would hear her.

"Let them." Rin answered, calmly. "That's why we're here."

"But a huge crowd of villagers, Lady Rin…" she sighed, hopelessly. The idea of so many disapproving eyes unnerved her, filling Tsukiyume with primal fear. If the villagers became a mob, they could kill Rin or Tsukiyume…

"Keep walking." Rin ordered.

Frowningly, Tsukiyume spurted forward with a few short hops and stopped, feeling her face redden as she became aware that this movement had garnered double the attention she'd had before. The villagers in the fields hardly worked at all now, they merely _pretended_ to be busy, when really, as they bent over, their hands stilled, and their eyes turned toward the strange women and their horse, passing by.

Ahead of them then, as they entered the thickest part of the village, where the huts were lined up together tightly, a small barricade of villagers had formed. At first Tsukiyume slowed, intimidated, but when Rin came close enough to her that Roba nickered uncomfortably at her scent, Tsukiyume glanced back at her mistress, tensely. "Lady Rin—they're going to try and stop us…"

"We'll cut them down." Rin muttered, pushing on Tsukiyume's backsides. She squinted past the hanyou and sighed. "They've brought out their priestesses. Fall back behind me, Tsukiyume."

The hanyou readily obeyed, turning and sprinting back several yards, watching with her white ears pricked alertly. They moved forward again, slow but steady.

When they came within a hundred feet, the group of villagers took up defensive positions and shouted at them. "Halt! Who are you?"

Rin didn't stop walking as she answered them. Her voice rose with power and authority. "We've come to see Inuyasha, let us pass."

There were two priestesses behind the three men of the village, and it was the priestesses that posed the true threat to both Rin and Tsukiyume. The men were unarmed. The priestesses hefted bows and arrows, and they appeared perfectly ready to draw them and fire on either Rin or Tsukiyume.

When Rin didn't stop moving forward, one priestess, the older of the two, raised her bow and notched an arrow, aiming. The other stepped forward slightly, so that she was even with the men, and spoke. "Stop! What business do you have with Lord Inuyasha?"

Rin halted now, not because she respected the priestesses, but because she was intrigued by the priestess's use of formal language. Inuyasha was well-known, a supernatural hero of sorts. Rin didn't know how the people of the village felt about him, and hadn't really expected them to resist her on Inuyasha's part, but now she found herself surprised. Could they really have so much respect for a _half-demon?_ Her thoughts, in spite of herself, were drawn to Sesshomaru's disregard for his half-brother for so many years, his insistence that Inuyasha was a pest, like a flea on his back. But Rin couldn't help the feeling that arose within her, bubbles of hope at the sight of this village coming out to defend a _half-demon._

_Hanyou have no place. _

Her hands, readied on Hikitsuru, loosened their grip and one transferred to her belly now, feeling the slowly growing roundness of the life that still clung on within her throughout this disaster, _her_ daughter. She stared at the priestesses, at the men, and became aware of the dainty, messy huts around her, all of the village…_Inuyasha was raised by his mother. By humans._ She thought, and then, _my daughter will be raised by me. A creature unto herself…_

To the priestess, Rin said, "I've come to ask him for asylum."

The villagers blinked, then looked to one another perplexedly. Rin heard them repeating the word, much as Miroku had when she'd told him the same thing. The priestess that had drawn her bow, lowered it, scowling. The priestesses looked to one another, uncertainly.

"What of the creature with you?" one the men demanded, warily.

Tsukiyume, hidden some distance behind Rin and Roba, cringed, as if expecting to be beaten.

"She is my guardian." Rin answered, calmly.

The priestesses were trying to shush the whispering men, knowing by the feel of Tsukiyume's aura, that the girl was hanyou, like Inuyasha. This intrigued them, and although they no longer perceived a threat, they were still curious. At last one of the priestesses, sounding warmer than she had before, asked, "Is your guardian…_related_ to Lord Inuyasha?"

Rin couldn't stop the smirk from coming over her face. She looked to the ground, trying to hide the expression in case it alarmed them. If only they knew how Rin was related to Inuyasha…

"Yes," she answered, "They are cousins."

This brought further whispering from the villagers. The tension was easing over into something closer to a wary amusement.

"May we escort you to Lord Inuyasha's estate?" asked the priestess who had not spoken before. She was in her late twenties perhaps, and bore a resemblance to Kikyo, although she was not as pale and her eyes were smaller, narrower.

"I would prefer to travel alone." Rin answered, and pulled on Roba's halter, moving her forward again. The villagers ahead of her dispersed, slipping between the huts, but the priestesses remained, merely moving aside as Rin passed between them. Tsukiyume followed as closely as she could without spooking Roba. Her ears were flattened, her eyes quick and darting, anticipating some sort of secret attack.

The priestesses bowed to her cordially as she passed. They waited, watching the retreating figures climb higher along the road, heading toward the shrine, and beyond it, Inuyasha's land. When the sounds of the horse's hooves had faded into the background whisper of the trees and the light spring wind, they at last moved in unison, moving to follow.

The older priestess led the way, confidently. "We can take the shortcut through the hills, Hyakka."

The younger hurried to keep up. She was shorter and several years younger. Her hair was a lighter color, more brown than her counterpart. "But Kumo—a half-demon and a mortal woman? Are they really a threat to Inuyasha-sama?"

"There was an incident a few years ago while you were still training, Hyakka, and I was away from the village. Strange youkai passed through the area looking for Inuyasha-sama then as well. They took Kagome and held her against him." Kumo puffed, cutting off the actual road and plunging into the trees and underbrush with Hyakka following close behind.

"Is it right to stop them Kumo? We don't know—they might've been telling the truth…" the younger priestess scrambled up the slop alongside the other woman, stumbling a little and cutting herself off as she fell.

Kumo reached back and caught her arm, steadying her. "Inuyasha-sama has known three generations of my family. If I can help him, I will. We won't stop them, but we will watch to make sure they do not intend to harm Inuyasha-sama and his family."

Hyakka nodded, "You are right."

Kumo—Lady Kaede's niece—nodded and continued to scale the hill.

(A/N: were Kikyo and Kaede blood sisters? I am thinking they were but I'm not sure. And if so, it seems priestesses don't have children…? Kaede seems childless anyway. But I figure if Kaede and Kikyo were sisters, it stood to reason there are other family members, perhaps a brother who would marry and stay in the village and continue the family. So why not make one of the women later on be another priestess?)

* * *

The mountain path at last peaked, passing the shrine and its stone steps, the little monument to the fallen priestess Kikyo and, in another grave nearby, her sister Kaede. Rin and Tsukiyume passed by it uneventfully, knowing nothing and caring nothing about the history and drama of that past, more than fifty years ago.

They followed the mountain path downward a short ways, and then paused at a fork. One lead downward, curving away into the distance, toward the eventual deep, flat blueness of the sea beyond, a view that was blocked by hills and cliffs as far as Tsukiyume and Rin were concerned. The other rose into the hills again…

Rin jerked on Roba's halter, forcefully. "Just a little further." She whispered, sighing.

Tsukiyume's ears drooped, her shoulders sagged. Inuyasha's scent lingered everywhere through this forest. The scent was very alike to Sesshomaru, but very distinct all on its own. It filled her with memories of two years ago, when she had journeyed to the hanyou's home in the crush of night, a stormy, troubled spring. Inuyasha had been struggling to save his mate and young son…he wouldn't be eager to welcome her back into his life because she had been partially to blame for the trouble…and yet she had also gotten them out of it…

She was jerked from her reverie when she saw Rin stop Roba and push away a few of the saddle bags. Tsukiyume gawked and began shaking her head, reaching out even though she was several feet away and didn't dare move any closer for fear of spooking the horse. "Lady Rin—you shouldn't ride—"

"You can't stop me." Rin shot back, impatiently. She pulled up the edges of her robe with one hand and grabbed tightly to Roba's mane with the other. Grunting, and making a tense, tight expression, Rin pulled herself into the saddle. Roba whinnied underneath her, sidestepping and growing excited by the change of weight. She sniffed, tossing her head up and down restlessly.

"Please, Lady Rin…" when Tsukiyume took a step forward, instinctually trying to restrain Roba to keep Rin safe, the horse shied away from her nickering and snorting.

"Get back!" Rin hissed, glaring. "You'll spook her."

Tsukiyume stepped back, cowering. "Yes…"

Roba let out a rushing exhalation and then, as Rin spurred her on, took off at a steady walk. Tsukiyume hurried after her, ears folded backward and her face twisted with worry. They moved up the path, following it as it circled the hill until the land evened and flattened out into a plateau. A wall rose up before them then, marking the beginning of Inuyasha's estate.

Rin pulled Roba up alongside the closed gate. As if she were performing in a theatrical drama, Rin had forced her face into a grave expression, tight-lipped and with slanted eyes. "Inuyasha!" she called out, shouting the name at the top of her lungs.

Tsukiyume remained many yards away, unconsciously crouched in a defensive position.

The answer was swift, far faster than either of them had expected. It came as Rin was opening her mouth to shout again, but she stopped, startled, as the youkai child they'd run into with Miroku appeared on top of the gate, grinning down on them.

"Hey! You guys again!" he chirped mischievously. "I beat you here."

Roba, reacting to the kit's abrupt appearance, stamped and snorted, tossing her head warningly. Rin pulled on the reins, steadying the flighty mare. When Roba had calmed somewhat, she looked up at the kit with fierce, angry eyes, though the rest of her mask-like face hadn't changed. "Let us inside. I must speak with Inuyasha."

"He sent me." the kit answered, still grinning, though his humor was beginning to run dry and his posture hinted that he was tense, perhaps even scared. "What is it you want?"

"I've told you once." Rin grumbled, her composure starting to slip.

Tsukiyume spoke up, trying to give Rin a break. "We need to ask Lord Inuyasha to protect us."

The kit cocked his head and put one hand to his chin, as if considering their request himself. "From who?" he moved so that one leg was tucked underneath him, the other hung forward over the gate, swinging merrily. It was a delicate balancing act; the kit was showing off and perhaps stalling. "And why?"

Tsukiyume and Rin answered in the same moment, but tossing out different answers: "That is none of…"

"Sesshomaru."

"…your concern."

The youkai child smirked, looking between them and laughing. "Inuyasha's going to _love_ you guys…"

Rin turned around on Roba's back, grimacing with the effort of the motion, and glared pointedly at Tsukiyume. The hanyou girl cringed, avoiding her accusatory gaze, her ears drooped. Without being asked to, she launched into a stumbling apology, "I'm sorry, Lady Rin…"

The gate creaked then, making the kitsune squeal in fright as he lost his balance. It ceased to matter in a second because he vanished into thin air, leaving nothing but a thin cloud of dust in his wake. From inside the gate Rin and Tsukiyume could hear the kit's grumbling. "Why'd you do that? You _knew_ I was sitting there, you jerk!"

"Cut your whining, Shippo." A deep, gruff voice answered him. A moment later and the gate was opening, revealing a golden-eyed, white-haired, dog-eared hanyou, standing with his arms crossed and an annoyed frown covering his face. Shippo, now tall enough that his little red-haired head was level with Inuyasha's hips, was grunting and pushing on the gate, forcing it open.

Roba backed away from the protruding gate, continuing to snort and stamp. The animal's nostrils were filled with youkai and hanyou scents, the only safe creature was on her backsides. Tsukiyume stayed quite a ways back, watching the horse and the gate uncertainly, almost timidly.

Inuyasha took Rin in, searching her up and down with his narrowed, calculating gaze. Rin met it the same way with her own earthy brown eyes, but after a moment she felt something dangerous flutter in her chest, a weakness awakening. She bit her lip, turned her face away, pulling hard on Roba's reins to make her back up. Then she cautiously dismounted, holding her breath until her feet were steadily on the ground again. She wobbled a little, to her shame, but held her chin high.

Her mate's younger brother was still scrutinizing her, challengingly. His eyes, they were the _same_ color, but a thousand times more expressive. Rin's learned ability to read inuyoukai feelings, no matter how subtle, were overwhelmed by Inuyasha. She felt her head spinning as her mind automatically tried to read the hanyou the same way she read her mate.

And then the dizziness seemed to take on a new dimension, tightening in her chest and then spreading in a jolt into her abdomen. Rin's proud chin trembled, her knees shook, but she refused to falter just yet. "Inuyasha." She called, tightly, "I ask for your protection."

"Feh!" he scoffed, shrugging his shoulders and half-turning his back on her. "How stupid do you think I am? You've got Sesshomaru's stink _all over you._" he turned his head slightly, peeking at her over one shoulder. "He wouldn't send you here, so this is either a trap, or…"

Rin crumpled, shaking, and clutching her belly. She choked back her whimpers, but her distress was impossible to hide between two hanyou and the kitsune youkai.

"Hey—are you okay?" Shippo asked concernedly.

The kit's words made Inuyasha face Rin directly again, and Tsukiyume cried out, rushing up from behind Rin to support her. Roba spooked at last, rushing away alongside the wall surrounding Inuyasha's property.

"Oh damn it all!" Inuyasha groaned, stepping forward as well, sniffing loudly. His face blanched as he recognized the troubling scents rising from Rin's body. "How stupid are you?" he snarled, gesturing wildly. "Shippo—get them inside and get my bastard brother's mate to lie down."

When the kit blinked up at him, slightly overwhelmed by the turn of events, and hesitated, Inuyasha swatted him impatiently in the back of the head, making him yelp. "Useless!"

The hanyou stepped forward himself to where Tsukiyume was cradling Rin helplessly and knelt, trying to scoop her up into his arms. Rin fought him, though her brow was now thick with sweat and her teeth gnashed together with pain. Inuyasha slapped her hands away—and Tsukiyume's as well when she tried to resist—and picked her up, carting her inside his estate.

Shippo, still baffled and alarmed, pulled hurriedly on the gate to close it again as Inuyasha passed through it with Tsukiyume following awkwardly behind. He grunted loudly as he tried to force it shut, "What's wrong with her, Inuyasha?"

"Stupid bitch rode the horse up here—and she's pregnant." His face was twisted with both irritation and a deep grimness as he crossed through the front gardens of his home, feeling Rin's fists gripping and tugging on his haori fiercely as she fought her internal struggle. The moment he reached the porch, he shouted out, "Kagome! Hurry up, I need you!"

* * *

A/N: Next chapter…

"_I understand that his missing arm, you are responsible for it." Tsukiyume murmured, staring meekly at the table. _

"_Yeah." Inuyasha grunted, eyeing her suspiciously, "What about it?"_

"_It is his greatest injury." Tsukiyume bowed, her dark hair hid her face from Inuyasha's scrutiny. "That is why Lady Rin choose you when she needed sanctuary. She believes you are the only threat to Sesshomaru in existence." _

_Inuyasha's face colored. He blustered, "Feh! Stop…" he paused, searching for Kagome's creative expression that described Tsukiyume's current tactic of flattery. __**Damn, what is it she always used to say about Miroku when he was flirting with girls? Even when they were ugly he called them pretty**__…His mind at last grabbed the expression and he spat it out hurriedly, "…buttering me up! It ain't working!"_


	18. Fortune or Failure

A/N: I watched the saddest, and yet sweetest episode the other night. As my roommate left me every night to stay at her boyfriend's apartment, I stayed and turned on Adult Swim's one hour block of Inuyasha. I'd forgotten how brilliant it can be. I saw a full story of how Inuyasha and Kikyo met and fell in love. It was so sweet, so tragic…like mythology, like Shakespeare. The English major and writer in me rejoiced. It makes me remember Sango's story. I gave it no thought until my little sister got some of the early episodes on DVD and told me that I should watch Sango's story. I sat down with some doubts…and was _blown_ away. I think I might've cried as Sango holds her brother after he's at last been shot by the arrows and realizes at the last moment that he's killed everyone. And then Sango's determination in spite of her own nearly mortal wounds, she was astounding. Astounding…ah, I am touched…and onto the story…

Disclaimer: I own no one. Just my boyfriend. Yes, and my betta fish.

* * *

Last Chapter: Shippo gave Inuyasha a warning that Tsukiyume and Rin were coming. Sesshomaru reached Sasugainu and Sasugainu told him everything he knew, terrified of Sesshomaru's rage and power. He vowed to help Sesshomaru reclaim Rin. Sesshomaru asked him if he would kill Shimofuri, and Sasugainu admitted that he couldn't. Sesshomaru then accepted his words as the truth and took up his offer of support. Rin and Tsukiyume faced off with the new priestesses in Kaede's village, but the priestesses followed them suspiciously. Rin and Tsukiyume met with Inuyasha at last, but Rin rode her horse to the gate and collapsed in pain.

* * *

**Fortune or Failure**

"Inuyasha," Kagome was standing in the kitchen, staring at her husband with wide eyes as he strolled in carrying a young woman in his arms. "What's going on?" she was holding a sleepy Akisame, who was slumped against her mother's chest and trying to drool.

"Kagome," the hanyou angled Rin in his arms, trying to expose her face more clearly to Kagome, "You need to deal with this."

Stunned, Kagome shook her head, taking a step back. "Inuyasha, what are you talking about?" Akisame woke up in her mother's arms, yawning wide.

"You've got all those magic cures and…_pills…"_ he hefted Rin around uncomfortably, ears folding backward, "I need you to keep her from…uh…" his face colored and his tongue seemed to stop working.

Kagome waited patiently, stroking her daughter's black hair. Her attention was drawn to Shippo and a black-haired, dog-eared hanyou girl that spilled into her kitchen behind Inuyasha and the human girl in his arms. Rin's face was twisted with pain, her hands fisted in Inuyasha's haori.

"She's going to lose her baby!" Tsukiyume offered, saying what Inuyasha couldn't out of embarrassment. The hanyou girl shyly met Kagome's blinking, confused gaze. "Please, Lady Rin has lost so much…"

Inuyasha twisted around to glare at her. "You have some explaining to do." He warned grumblingly. "I want some answers—and just because this stupid woman is falling over sick doesn't mean I'm letting you stay in _my_ house…"

"Inuyasha." Kagome snapped, and at once her husband cringed, ears flattening at her reprimanding tone. "This is my house too." She went on, sighing.

"Well then cure her so we can get her the hell out of here!"

"I can't cure her if she's having a miscarriage!" Kagome half-shouted. Akisame was squirming in her arms, fussily. "Shippo! Come over here and take Aki for me."

The kit hurried forward, accepting Akisame into his arms as Kagome ordered. The toddler was unhappy with this switch, and at once she started whimpering, stretching her little clawed hands out for Kagome and making an attempt to speak. "Maaaah! Maaah!" Shippo used both hands, holding her back and bouncing up and down, trying to distract her. Akisame scowled sourly at him, stubborn and cranky.

As Inuyasha and Kagome squabbled and moved further into the house, still carrying the moaning, sweating Rin, Shippo moved to stand beside Tsukiyume. "Don't look so worried!" he grinned, projecting confidence. "If anyone can save her, it's Kagome."

Tsukiyume's ears were still flattened, her lips pinched in a narrow, white line. "I don't know what else she can survive…" she noticed the toddler squirming in Shippo's arms and blinked, turning her full gaze on the child. Akisame had done the same, taking in the stranger that Shippo was no holding her captive next to, and she had decided, definitively, that it was _not_ acceptable. She started to whimper, her face wrinkling like an old map, her little fists banged on Shippo's shoulders.

"Oh great." Shippo groaned, trying to bounce and distract her again. He peeked at Tsukiyume from the corners of his eyes and added, "This one takes after Inuyasha."

In height, Shippo was about midway to Tsukiyume's shoulder. Akisame was already a large load for the kit. Tsukiyume's nose picked out the familiar parts of Akisame's scent, revealing that the pup, though mostly human in appearance, was actually a relative. Tsukiyume stuttered, staring at the child. "C-can I hold her?"

Shippo took a step back from her, nervously. "Uh, that's probably not…"

In that moment a frazzled Inuyasha appeared, stomping out of the guest room where he and Kagome had laid Rin down to rest. He jabbed a clawed fingertip at Tsukiyume. "You—in there, get ready to answer my questions." He directed her with the same accusatory finger toward the sitting room before his attention turned to Shippo. "Runt—go get the priestesses from the village."

Shippo frowned, "What about…"

As if reading the kit's mind, Inuyasha stepped forward and snatched his squalling daughter out of Shippo's arms. "Go," he jabbed his finger at the kit again, "_Now."_

That left Tsukiyume, shocked, watching Inuyasha blankly. For a moment, as Shippo disappeared out the door, dropping to all fours to run faster, one could feel the oddness of two inuhanyou staring one another down. Inuyasha was the older of the two, by far. Even without his effective time-travel of fifty years pinned against a tree by Kikyo's arrow, he was still offspring of Inutaisho, renowned but long since departed. Tsukiyume was the daughter of a different inuyoukai ruler, and like Inuyasha her parents were deceased, but there were still humans that recalled her mother vividly, unlike with Inuyasha's father, who had become more legend than memory.

"Sit down." Inuyasha ordered her, gruntingly, "And when I get back we'll talk." He turned his back on her and hurried away. His daughter was in his arms, calm now and falling asleep again. Tsukiyume watched Inuyasha's form shrinking as he moved into the hall. She searched her memories, pulling out the image of Inuyasha's son…and then she caught sight of the boy, barely visible, peeking out of the door to the guest room where Rin was resting. He was no longer the infant she recalled, but a boy, clearly an almost mirror image of his father.

Inuyasha snapped at his son, "Koinu." The boy, who'd been staring curiously at Tsukiyume before, now stepped out of the room and stood at attention. Inuyasha knelt to be more on eye-level with his son and placed Akisame at Koinu's feet. "Take your sister and watch over her for me."

Koinu nodded, but his white dog ears, so like his father's, were swiveling uncertainly. "Dad," his blue eyes flicked once toward Tsukiyume, "What about…"

"Stay in our room until your mother or me comes to get you."

Koinu nodded firmly, "Yes." he bent and pulled on Akisame. His sister was about half his size, so it was a hard load, but the pup eventually had her dragged onto her feet and lead her away.

Inuyasha paused before stepping into the guest room, torn between the sight of his son guiding Akisame down the hallway so obediently, and the hard weight of Tsukiyume's eyes on his backsides. Taking a deep breath, he ventured into the guest room. Most often it was used to house Sango and Miroku and their children while they visited Inuyasha and Kagome, but currently it was empty and it was fast becoming Rin's room. It was a small place, furnished with tatami mats and a window on one side. Sango had given birth to her only daughter, Kasai in that room. Inuyasha was thankful that he hadn't been around to witness that. It was hard enough for him to deal with the births of his own children. Miroku's ability to endure the births of not just two, but _four_ and soon to be _five_ babies astounded him.

But this was not a time of tense excitement, like the kind that came before the birth of a new family member. This was the tight dread that an injury, or that an unexpected death gave out. It was too soon for Inuyasha to predict just who would be lost today: Rin's child, or both Rin and her child. The scent inside the room, of sweat, pain, and tears, was mildly nauseating. It occurred to him, dimly, that this child that was about to die was _his niece…_

The idea made his stomach clench up, for more than one reason.

Kagome was knelt at Rin's bedside. Her face was anxious, her jaw tightened. The muscles in her neck were strained as well. When she heard him enter, she asked, "Where's Koinu and Akisame? Did you tell Shippo to watch after them or go to the village?"

The hanyou felt a little warmth at that. Kagome, in spite of herself and the troubling duty of taking care of Rin, was worried for her own children continuously. It might've seemed selfish, but with semi-strangers in the house and the fact that she couldn't be with her own babies while Rin sat prostrate and helplessly losing her unborn baby, Kagome was greatly aware of what was at stake.

"I sent Shippo to the village. I left Akisame with Koinu."

This drew a swift look from Kagome, "Inuyasha," she frowned, "He's not even five yet!"

"Feh!" he grunted, "He's better at looking after her than Shippo is!"

Kagome's lips narrowed into a thin unhappy line. She might've spoken up again to fight him, but Rin's moaning drew her away. She touched the other woman's face and neck, feeling temperature and pulse. Then, tentatively, she probed Rin's robes, pulling away the outer robe and trying to lightly feel her abdomen.

Inuyasha's face began to color; he turned his back on Kagome and the sickened, sweating Rin. "Uh…" he half-grunted, "I…maybe I'll go and watch after Koinu and Akisame. Kagome?" he tried to sneak a look at her over his shoulder, but Kagome's hands were still probing, her face was still tight and grim. "You'll manage here right?"

She didn't answer. Rin made a choking sound and began fighting her, whimpering in the back of her throat. She pushed at Kagome's hands, resisting her. "Where…who…?" Rin was asking, weakly.

Kagome withdrew her hands, sighing. "You're safe."

Inuyasha said nothing and decided, in that moment, that it would be wise to leave the room.

Rin squinted up at the woman that was caring for her. Her face was covered in sweat and creased with confusion. She felt cautiously over her robes and her eyes moved, taking in the little room around her. "This isn't the castle." She grimaced with pain and rolled onto her side, curling halfway into a fetal position.

"No," Kagome started, cautiously, "This isn't the castle…"

Rin made another choked sound, this time it was not out of simple physical pain, but now a deeper, gut-wrenching emotional reaction. "No…" she moaned, covering her face with one hand. "Not again, no…" the tears leaked out from between her fingers, slipping onto the sheets on the bed below her.

"This has happened to you before?" Kagome asked, slowly. Rin wasn't looking at her, which was fortunate because Kagome's facial expression was tense and grim. She watched with growing worry as Rin's hands clutched and fisted in the covers, as the younger woman's body shuddered with pain.

There were drugs, Kagome knew, that could calm the muscles of the uterus and halt a miscarriage. They didn't always work, but in the modern era many babies were given just enough time with these drugs to survive. Kagome had the potential power to save Rin's baby, but she could never get the drugs to her on time, and unless she took Rin through the well into the modern era, the doctors were unlikely to just hand out the drugs…

And then, abruptly, Shippo burst through the door, beaming, and escorting both of the village priestesses. Hyakka and Kumo hesitated at the door, their faces stern and grim. They both wore the characteristic red hakama (A/N: Hakama right? Kikyo's pants are different from IY's but still…maybe?) and white tops that had acted like warning colors to Kagome, the first sign of coming disaster. She still caught herself, years later, staring at their priestess robes and scowling.

"Lady Hyaka, Lady Kumo." Kagome blinked, addressing them formally and bowing as she hefted herself up from Rin's bedside. "That was fast…"

Hyakka looked toward Kumo, letting the older priestess explain. "We were already following this woman and the hanyou that accompanied her when young Shippo came searching for us."

Kagome sighed, only slightly relieved at this. "I don't think there's anything that can be done." She gestured weakly at Rin's shuddering, fragile form. "She's having a miscarriage; at least that's what the girl that was with her told me…"

"She is." Shippo nodded firmly, "She rode up on horseback when she came to see us. Inuyasha thinks that's what did it."

"She is an unusual woman…" Hyakka was saying, quietly. Kumo was already kneeling at Rin's bedside, touching her new patient's forehead and neck and starting to probe her robes.

"She isn't bleeding yet." Kumo observed aloud.

Kagome's shoulders sagged. "I'd better go get something for that."

"It would be wise to be prepared, but it is possible to save the child still, Lady Kagome." Kumo murmured while her hands continued to busy themselves on Rin's body. "Hyakka—go back to the village, hurry…"

Hyakka nodded, bowing. "Hai."

As the younger priestess left the room, Kagome stepped forward, kneeling at Kumo's side. "Lady Kumo? Are you sure about this? What, if I may ask, are you going to give her to stop the miscarriage?"

"A few mixed herbs to calm her and strengthen the child." Kumo's hands had undone Rin's obi and parted her innermost robes at last. She slipped her hand inside and laid it flat along Rin's belly, feeling the gentle rise and dip between flat stomach and slowly protruding abdomen. Her expression grew more solemn now. Slowly, she withdrew her hand. "I would guess that the child was conceived in the very late fall, or early winter. It is a first pregnancy."

Kagome shook her head, "No, I think she's had miscarriages before."

Kumo fastidiously closed Rin's robes and worked the obi delicately, trying to refasten it to preserve the other woman's modesty. "If that is true and she has a history—the child will almost certainly die. She is of nobility, surely the finest priestesses were there to treat her and if her babies couldn't survive even then…" Kumo shook her head, withdrawing and folding her hands in a prayer-like motion. "It may be a hopeless endeavor, but we will try."

"I know." Kagome agreed, sighing sadly. She adjusted her own position, mirroring Kumo's, and took up the same stance familiarly.

"But…" Shippo's small voice made both Kagome and Kumo glance back at him, blinking and almost alarmed. They'd forgotten about his presence and—considering the very _female_ topic—he was actually moderately unwelcome. (A/N: I think this is true, sort of. In most cultures, short of ours today, women keep babies and birthing and miscarriage and such strongly hidden from male eyes. Men don't want to deal with it and often it's considered "impure." Imagine a culture where for the week, roughly, you have your period you get to be closeted away from all of the men around you. Yep, what a world!) "She's Sesshomaru's mate. He's an inuyoukai. Would _he_ bring in _priestesses_ to treat her?"

Kumo and Kagome were silent, considering Shippo's words with renewed hope. Kagome stared at Rin's shaking, sweaty face and hands, and prayed that Shippo was right.

* * *

Tsukiyume tried to keep one eye and one ear tuned to the room where Rin was being kept, but the voices inside it were dim, even to her ears, and Inuyasha right in front of her was much, much louder. She faced his assault, ears pressed against her skull, and lips turned downward in a continuous, uncomfortable frown as he demanded answers viciously.

"What the hell are you two doing here? What is going on with that stupid bastard Sesshomaru?" his fangs glimmered beneath his lips, looking especially sharp.

Tsukiyume took a moment to examine this cousin of hers. His golden eyes, like sunrise or sunset, like honey. The fair hair like ice over a pond, or snow blowing out of the sky. He was reminiscent of a blizzard, blustering and powerful. He was a lot like Sesshomaru in appearance. Their facial features were different. Inuyasha's face was more careworn, showing its wear lines like battle scars, marks made by one who had _lived_ in his face. Sesshomaru was statuesque. His beauty was immortal, and pristine—but also distant and cold, like an iceberg floating out to sea. The brothers looked very much alike, but they were very different. Tsukiyume found herself wondering what made the difference. Was it Inuyasha's humanity? Sesshomaru's inuyoukai mother, perhaps? What had their father contributed, or did he exhibit both personalities and all their traits…?

"I am Lady Rin's hostage." Tsukiyume began, frankly, "I am to protect her while she runs from Lord Sesshomaru…"

"What? Back up! Start over!" Inuyasha scowled, waving his arms in a sort of ceasefire motion. "You're going too fast! The last thing I knew that girl in there and my half-brother were mates. Now she's…running from him? In her current…" he stuttered a little, embarrassedly. "_…condition?"_

"Her condition is coincidence." Tsukiyume sighed. She explained her brother and uncle's plot, their rescuing of her from Sesshomaru, and then their move to inform Rin of Sesshomaru's deception. When she began describing Sesshomaru's involvement in the Middle Land's civil war, and Sesshomaru's resulting ownership of the Isei and of the inuyoukai bitch Ginrei, Inuyasha silenced her, interrupting the retelling.

"So you're saying that the rumor Shippo came back telling us is true? Sesshomaru married this Gin-something bitch and keeps her hidden in the Isei?" he cocked his head, indicating curiosity, but his eyes were narrowed, revealing his doubt. He was scrutinizing Tsukiyume carefully, trying to detect a lie.

Tsukiyume answered him nervously; aware that she was perhaps passing or failing some delicate test. "Yes, it's true. Sesshomaru deceived Rin and took this other woman as his wife. She…" Tsukiyume swallowed and risked a glance at the room where Rin was being kept. "Lord Sesshomaru's wife is currently pregnant with his first official heir. A daughter."

Inuyasha sat back, staring at her blankly for a moment as this news sunk in on him. At last his face transformed, quirking and wrinkling as he burst out laughing. "That old bastard! _Two_ daughters? Ha!" he pounded one fist on the table in front of him, "Serves him right, the asshole…"

"You said your mate could save Lady Rin's baby?" Tsukiyume interrupted his glee.

Inuyasha, still chuckling, shrugged. "Kagome's got a lot of magic tricks. We'll see."

"Can…" Tsukiyume shifted uneasily, "Can we stay here…?"

The mirth in Inuyasha's face vanished at once as he scowled. "I ain't promising anything!"

Tsukiyume's ears folded backward, her face fell. "Oh."

Inuyasha caught her change in mood, sensing her potential grief, and blanched, shaking his head. "Hey—don't start crying or anything!" he scolded, stumbling a little over the words. He scooted away, as if about to leave, but paused, uncomfortable. He sighed and crossed his arms over his chest and offered her further explanation. "If I know Sesshomaru he'll be like a nest of wasps over this mess. Don't get me wrong—it's hilarious and I'd pay money to see his face right now, but…"

The hanyou stopped, his expression changed, becoming softer and somber. He heaved yet another sigh, long and deep. "It's like someone taking Kagome away from me…"

Tsukiyume frowned and leaned forward aggressively. "Lady Rin wasn't _taken_ from him. She left with shishi-sama of her own accord."

"Yeah but me letting you stay here is…" his brow furrowed, a snarl curled his lips, "Hell no! It ain't happening!" his eyes weren't seeing Tsukiyume, they were unfocused and glazed. He was contemplating his brother's power, as well as the vulnerability of his family. His human wife, his young and innocent children…

As much as he partially delighted in Sesshomaru's misfortune and suffering, Inuyasha also sympathized with him. Though they professed to hate one another, and had attempted to kill each other on numerous occasions, they remained kin, half-brothers. Aside from that, there was also the fact that Inuyasha had felt the pain of nearly losing Kagome many, many times. He didn't want to join the mess, didn't want to antagonize Sesshomaru…

"Are you afraid of Lord Sesshomaru?" Tsukiyume asked, quietly.

Inuyasha blinked and found the hanyou girl staring at him frankly. He bristled and shifted uneasily under her scrutiny. "Hell no! Feh! That old bastard…"

"I understand that his missing arm, you are responsible for it." Tsukiyume murmured, staring meekly at the table.

"Yeah." Inuyasha grunted, eyeing her suspiciously, "What about it?"

"It is his greatest injury." Tsukiyume bowed, her dark hair hid her face from Inuyasha's scrutiny. "That is why Lady Rin choose you when she needed sanctuary. She believes you are the only threat to Sesshomaru in existence."

Inuyasha's face colored. He blustered, "Feh! Stop…" he paused, searching for Kagome's creative expression that described Tsukiyume's current tactic of flattery. _Damn, what is it she always used to say about Miroku when he was flirting with girls? Even when they were ugly he called them pretty…_His mind at last grabbed the expression and he spat it out hurriedly, "…buttering me up! It ain't working!"

Tsukiyume didn't rise out of her bow. "It is truth. I would have you ask Lady Rin, but she is…" the girl stopped, swallowing thickly. Her shoulders bobbed with the movement.

Inuyasha huffed. "She'll be okay. Better in no time."

* * *

Sesshomaru passed out of the Hokubo without leaving a trail of carnage in his wake. Sasugainu was left alive and in power, but sworn to Sesshomaru's allegiance and against Shimofuri. Time would only tell if Sesshomaru came to value Sasugainu as an ally and, with that value or lack of it, he would decide whether or not to spare the other lord.

In the meantime his conscience had continued terrorizing him. The latest torture picked up its pace as Sesshomaru passed into the Isei and found himself heading aimlessly for Naishougoto.

_Rin will come back if you right your wrongs…_

It had been wrong to use the war in the Isei to claim one of Nishiyori's bitches. It had been wrong to keep the knowledge secret from Rin. It had been wrong to marry Ginrei. It had been wrong to conceive his first heir—a _daughter _anyway—with Ginrei.

There was one simple way to "right" those wrongs. Since time travel wasn't possible in Sesshomaru's mind, and he could not properly amend these problems, there was only one option left to him: _kill Ginrei._

The idea had occurred to him in passing before. She was hard to deal with, hard to tame, to please, and to keep as a secret. She was more trouble than she was worth. Guilt had surfaced sometimes, making him consider giving her a proper, honorable death to allow her to rejoin the family she so obviously loved and missed. There would be no shame in it, right?

He crossed the Isei, avoiding all other forms of life, aiming for Naishougoto.

* * *

Ginrei woke with a start, her heart pounding inside her ribcage. For a moment her eyes played tricks on her, spinning the shadows into smoke and running, terrified women. In the past Ginrei would've been deceived by her own living memories, replaying themselves before her eyes in the confusion of her waking. Now she closed her eyes firmly and listened with her ears.

This was the palace on the lake. Maids murmured downstairs, there was the acrid smoke of a fire with the leftovers of a meal cooking over it. Water was being heated for tea; the palace was abuzz, as if this were midday, not the middle of the night.

Ginrei opened her eyes again and this time took in the light. Her traumatic memories had faded, at last letting her see the world as it really was. The lighting on the walls told her the sun had set and the moon was low, so low that its pale, ghostly light snuck in through her shuttered window screens. It was late in the night, or rather, very early in the morning.

Footsteps raced up the stairs and down the hall, reaching Ginrei's room where they halted, collapsing into a kneeling position. The screen door slid open and Ginrei sat up, regarding the maid alertly. It was one of her many human attendants, prostrated low to the floor. "My lady—your husband has just arrived."

She wasn't surprised. Sesshomaru apparently ran by his own time schedule, not the sun's, the moon's or the human servants'. This maid was ill-prepared, her robes were messy, her hair was askew and tied up messily. No doubt the entire residence was the same way, caught off guard by its master's unexpected return.

"Is it cold this morning?" Ginrei asked, sighing.

The maid nodded, still ducked in her bow. "I will fetch my lady the warmer robes."

Ginrei moved off her futon carefully, timing her progress by the maid's so that by the time she was standing upright properly, the maid had dragged out the robes and brought them over to her. They moved silently and efficiently, as if in a somber dance on some unseen stage. Without many maids to help her, it took Ginrei longer to dress, but it was finished soon enough. She sat while the maid ran a comb through her hair hurriedly, but fortunately Ginrei's silvered hair had never put up much of a fight before a comb. It fell into place, long and straight strands neatly in order, swiftly.

She left her room with the maid trailing her, wearing robes of white and gold. They headed downstairs where Ginrei at once scented her husband's presence. But his scent had changed from the last time she'd smelled him. He carried the scent of wilderness with him, wilderness and blood, like a warrior returning from war.

Ginrei's step faltered, she had other memories of that smell, from a night in the wintertime. Beyond the stink of the fire that had consumed the castle she'd been born in…in the gardens, the army had circled, smelling similarly like blood and the wilds.

The maid came up behind Ginrei, frowning concernedly. "My lady?"

Ginrei shook her head, swallowing thickly. "It's nothing." She gestured down the hallway feebly, "Lead the way."

The maid nodded and stepped forward until she reached the door of the small audience room where Sesshomaru would be waiting for his wife to greet him. She dropped to her knees and slid the door open, bowing as she waited for Ginrei to slip past her and enter the small room.

Sesshomaru sat at the little table with the tray of tea in front of him, untouched. That wasn't unusual of the demon lord, but what did alarm Ginrei was the way he didn't lift his gaze to her as she entered the room, the way he stared unseeingly ahead. There were no other hints of emotion on his face, nothing to give him away, but as Ginrei entered the room, she felt her skin crawling with a growing sense of apprehension that bordered on fear…

"Lord Sesshomaru." She bowed to him, touching her forehead to the matting, and waited to be acknowledged.

"Sit up." He ordered, curtly. His voice had a hoarse quality to it, as though he hadn't used it in a long time. As Ginrei sat up her eyes flew not to his face, but to his single hand in his lap, perilously close to the blades he had tied around his waist. She waited patiently, arguing within herself what might be disturbing him, and whether or not he would harm her while she was carrying his child. Unconsciously, her hands clasped over her abdomen, feeling the tiny bit of roundness, the first sign of his pup within her, still invisible to the outside world, unless one possessed the sense of smell of a youkai.

When Sesshomaru didn't speak to her again, and the minutes continued to drag by, Ginrei at last asked, "Something troubles Lord Sesshomaru?"

His golden eyed gaze flicked to her briefly, his lips curled downwards. As was characteristic, however, he made no other response, and in another second, turned his gaze away, as if bored and loosing interest.

A maid opened the screen door and entered, stepping forward timidly and reaching for the tea kettle and the teacups to serve the couple. Sesshomaru ordered her to leave, his voice cold and distant, almost reptilian. The maid bowed, muttering apologies, and vanished out the door, shutting it as she went.

"You are well, I presume." Sesshomaru said, abruptly, breaking the silence when the maid had vanished.

Ginrei ducked her head, half bowing, half nodding. "I am." she paused, staring at the table and frowning slightly. "I do wonder what has become of Lord Sesshomaru. The last moment I saw him he spoke of his human mate, he was going to see her. I am left to wonder now why he returns so soon and…" she noticed that his eyes had landed on her, pinning her like knives. She didn't dare continue speaking, and didn't dare meet that look. There was fire in it; she knew this without seeing it.

"Ginrei." Sesshomaru called her name with a rough, and deeper voice than was normal. "What do you want?"

The question startled Ginrei into meeting his eyes. She stared at him, caught, understanding somehow that she stood on the edge of a sword, one false step and she could fail. Something huge had happened outside of Naishougoto, something had changed Sesshomaru in the week or so he had been away. Now he posed questions asking her what she wanted—was he feeling his conscience? Had his mate learned of her? Had she died because of it…?

The idea made too much sense. The darkness she saw in Sesshomaru's eye matched the idea a little to well. Her hands moved a little over her belly, touching on her abdomen over the fabric of her robes. She drew comfort, thinking Sesshomaru would not kill his heir…

At one point she might've wanted death, to join her kin in the next world, because it was the honorable thing to do and because she was lonely. But the child within her had changed her. From an early point her own noise had told her this was a female, therefore useless to Sesshomaru. Maternal instincts she'd never known she possessed made Ginrei cherish it. Pregnancy had, oddly enough, stabilized her grief, strengthening her from the inside out. Her wants were now tied in with the idea of her daughter, growing within her, but was it the right answer to give to Sesshomaru? Would he believe it?

Her instinct was to bow, to defer to him and offer respect, but she decided against that. She would keep her face held high, to allow him to see her expression, to look into her eyes and understand the truth and conviction of her words.

"I want to have my daughter, Lord Sesshomaru."

His face rippled briefly and eventually settled with one eyebrow slightly raised. "Your daughter?" he asked, in a surprisingly soft voice.

Ginrei quailed slightly. Yes, it was _his_ child too, wasn't it? Had she made a grave mistake? She searched herself, trying to find the words to correct it, but Sesshomaru lost interest in gazing at her and looked away.

"She may be your daughter, if you wish." He responded, gently. There was a tiny change in his posture, a loosening in his frame. His shoulders lowered, his single hand in his lap relaxed. "I must go." He announced, quietly, and then turned his gaze on her carefully, examining her.

Ginrei pretended not to notice or feel the weight of his eyes on her. What did he see? What was he thinking? Her fingers stroked in tiny movements over her abdomen, as if it were her unborn daughter that needed comfort.

"You will send for me when the child is near." Sesshomaru said, not in question or in request, but as an order.

Ginrei bowed. "Yes, husband." While her face was lowered and hidden from him, she blinked at the matting on the floor, as the folds and ruffles in her robes. _Why does he want to be here for it? _

Before she'd sat upright again, Sesshomaru had risen to his feet and slipped soundlessly past her and to the door. Ginrei was startled as she rose into her sitting position by the gentle grating of the screen door on its track. She listened as her husband left the room, not bothering to close the door behind him. Alone Ginrei could smell the tea and her husband's lingering fragrance. She shuddered and wrapped her arms around herself more tightly.

The tea on the little table had not yet cooled; it stayed in Sesshomaru's cup, steaming faintly. Ginrei slowly extended her hand and scooped the teacup closer to hold it against her chest, drawing what little warmth she could from it.

* * *

Sesshomaru had come to Naishougoto to kill Ginrei, and then had found himself unable to do it. Her scent, rich with their daughter, had haunted him, as had Ginrei's beauty, fear, and courage. She'd been afraid, sensing instinctively his change, but she had conducted herself well. Sesshomaru could find no fault in her. She had strengthened, solidifying into a worthy wife, a worthy mother of his heirs.

Aside from that there was also the disturbing memories playing through his mind. Ginrei had spoken to him in a way Rin might've, she was carrying his daughter, as Rin was when he'd last seen her. Sesshomaru was tense as he moved through Naishougoto, like a wraith, deep and buried inside his thoughts, inside his past. He had always been a creature of silence, always dwelling in solitude. Rin's arrival when she'd been nothing more than a little girl had been the biggest change to his life since his father's death. To Rin he was able to unload a little, to unwind and speak a tiny portion of what was on his mind.

Sitting with Ginrei he'd wanted to do the same thing, to ask her what she would've done if she were in Rin's place. He needed to understand a female mind, but revealing his weakness to his wife was impossible. How could he speak of his troubles to anyone but Rin? And this trouble _was_ Rin…

Seeking counsel had never been something Sesshomaru enjoyed. He didn't talk, he didn't expose himself or his thoughts, but this situation left him stripped of his dignity and without any other way to relieve the pressures building within him.

He summoned Daken, making the old, grizzled youkai walk with him alongside the half-frozen lake in the middle of the night. It was still chilly; their breathing was visible against the breeze as a thick fog around their faces. Dawn was starting in the east, so faintly that the sky showed no light, just a change in the darkness from the deepest black to a lighter tint. Dark haze marked where clouds would eventually be illuminated by the rising sun. The inuyoukai feet, booted in their bipedal, human-like forms, crunched on old ice and a fresh frost.

There were heavy bags underneath Daken's eyes. He knew of Rin's disappearance through rumor and the trading of messages through Sesshomaru's network of spies. Also he'd learned a little of Sesshomaru's enraged rampage through the Middle Lands: the death of Arasoizuki, the attack on Shimofuri's province…there was nothing that he knew of yet about the Hokubo and Sasugainu.

In most circumstances Daken would've initiated the conversation playfully, with the ease his long acquaintance to the dog lord afforded him over time. But in this case he was tense, believing that Sesshomaru had gone slightly mad. Provoking Sesshomaru, no matter how playfully or skillfully it was done, might cost Daken his life. It was a price he didn't want to pay.

Yet, if he didn't start the conversation they'd just travel slowly around the lake in silence, suffering the early chill of the morning for nothing. At last he drew up the courage and cleared his throat. "Your wife has been doing wonderfully, Lord Sesshomaru." He kept a tight rein on his voice, making sure not to mock Sesshomaru. He was successful, sounding genuine, as if making a simple report on Ginrei's health, as if this were any other visit.

The younger inuyoukai made no answer. His light hair, white even in the blackness, was bright, standing out sharply against the blackness of trees, even the dull of dead grass on the rolling hills around the lakeshore.

"I estimate your first heir will be with us before the snow returns." He paused, struggling to force his old feet to move at the same steady, seemingly confident pace that Sesshomaru was setting. "You should be proud, my lord." Now the mocking entered his voice, before he could stop it…

Sesshomaru stopped, stiffening. He lifted his head and sniffed once, as if finding something interesting on the breeze. Daken stopped just behind him, feeling his heart thump wildly inside his chest. He stared at Sesshomaru's backsides, waiting tensely.

"Daken." Sesshomaru called in a voice that was uncharacteristically soft. "I have a new assignment for you."

"Yes, my lord?" Daken frowned at the way his words were strained and high pitched with fear. Sesshomaru would see right through him.

"You will leave Naishougoto and take as much time as you can to search out the one responsible for poisoning Rin."

Daken blinked and shook his head once, as if dizzy. "Of course my lord, but…"

"And when you have found the one responsible," Sesshomaru interrupted him with growing strength, "You will publicize your findings. I will take action and punish those responsible. In the meantime you will search for Rin's whereabouts." He stopped, lifting his nose again, "You will not return until you have located her unless otherwise summoned. Do you understand your assignment, Daken?"

"You want Lady Rin to hear about what you're doing." Daken inferred, smirking humorlessly. "You are apologizing with your actions."

Sesshomaru glanced at the older inuyoukai with what was very clearly a glare. "I am exacting justice."

"For Lady Rin."

Sesshomaru ignored him. "Do you understand your assignment?" he asked again.

"What do I do when I find her, Lord Sesshomaru?" Daken asked, beginning to grow comfortable once more. Sesshomaru was not about to kill him, but instead had given him a very important task. He would be indispensable, it was a major relief.

"You will report her whereabouts to me and keep watch on her."

Daken stepped forward, trying to see Sesshomaru's face. "And you'll take her back?"

Sesshomaru didn't answer; instead he began walking, leaving Daken behind. The old, grizzled inuyoukai watched the young dog lord moving away, serene in the blackness, passing through the weak stripes of light and dark made by the slowly appearing shadows of the trees. The dawn light was growing, making the east glow blue-gray now. Clouds obscured the sunlight, but the temperature was rising swiftly.

_He is a stubborn one._ Daken mused, grinning tightly with nervousness. _Will stubbornness bring fortune to him, or failure? _

* * *

A/n: Next time…

"_I __**know**__ that." Kagome pushed her face right back into his, stepping onto her tip toes to do it. "We can't just let her go, something could happen to her! We have to let her and her friend stay here and tell Sesshomaru that she—"_

_Inuyasha interrupted her, blustering wildly. "Are you fucking insane?"_


	19. Rin's Bargain

A/N: it's been a while since I wrote anything. Started working two weeks ago. No time, no time. But I'm making money! Medallion Press rejected my novel. It was a hard blow, but I'll keep trying. Sigh…

Disc: Nope…not mine.

* * *

Last Chapter: IY and Kagome found themselves with Rin and Tsukiyume added to their family. Kagome took in Hyakka and Kumo, the priestesses who replaced Kaede, to treat Rin, who appears to be suffering yet another miscarriage. IY interrogated Tsukiyume. Sesshomaru decided, in his madness, that killing Ginrei would bring Rin back. He went to do it and couldn't. Instead he took Daken and sent him away on a new mission: find the people responsible for poisoning Rin and making her miscarry.

* * *

**Rin's Bargain**

Rin awoke in the night, to the blackness of the strange, small room, gasping and covered with sweat. A dull, deep throb inside her abdomen made her groan, gritting her teeth. Feverishly, she pawed at her face, her hair, then reached to her neck. Each time her fingers touched skin they came back dripping wet. Waves of hot and cold swept over her wildly.

Her hands groped further down her body, uncaring that she wasn't alone in the little room. Brushing past tender, swollen breasts and the lump where her latest doomed child had taken root. She groaned again, trying to block out the world. She could close her eyes, she could imagine a different room around her, but she couldn't close her ears to the voices of the strangers nearby.

"I wish there was something we could give her for pain—it must be terrible." A young woman's voice spoke, murmuring and low. What sounded like baby blubbering came from the same direction.

"Pain medicines would only stress her body further." A deeper, more mature voice answered in the same soft way. "She has come to the thick of it. We will see now whether she loses the child or if they have the strength to make it through."

Rin rolled onto her side, fighting the pain, and stretched out one hand into the darkness. "Sessho…" she called, crying, like a child. A different ache started inside her, but her mind quailed away from the harsh reality that waited in her conscious thoughts and memories. Without fully remembering why, she understood that she was without him, she was alone, stranded from her lover, mate, protector for the first time since she'd died and been saved by his sword…

The voices stopped, she heard their bodies shifting. When they spoke again it was hushed and unclear, Rin couldn't make it out and didn't try very hard to do so. She stretched with her hand again, long fingers straining and gripping at the nothingness of the air. "Sesshomaru…" she whimpered, pleadingly.

A warm touch gripped her searching hand, squeezing it tightly. "He's not here." A gentle hand brushed her forehead, smoothed her hair. It was like the touch of her mother, many, many years ago…

Rin's eyes leaked tears, but she had no energy to express the ravaging sobs that wanted to tear out of her. Everything _hurt_.

_I'm going to die here, alone._ She found herself thinking it and slipping into a darkness filled with pain, it would haunt her dreams. _Please,_ she sent out the silent prayer, but she hardly knew what she was begging for, what she wanted to happen or didn't want to happen. In the end her prayer settled into one simple want: _please, no more pain…no more pain…_

She slipped into a dream where she was a child, running through a dark wilderness. Trees clawed at her, insects clamored at her face. She stumbled and fell, her limbs too heavy to move or lift. She struggled to crawl forward, feeling the dirt run over her cheek, and then the branches dig into her abdomen, deep inside it, as if she were a carcass and she was feeling the maggots, eating her insides away. Crying out for help, she saw movement, a black shape rise out of the wilderness. Her heart leapt, beating wildly.

_Sesshomaru…_

But the shape moved with lightening speed, slashing her back, her stomach, then pouncing on her and ripping chunks of her flesh away. At first it was a massive wolf youkai, its hair brushed her face, filling her mouth thickly when she screamed—and then the color lightened and became white as light reflected from the sea on a sunny day. Golden eyes peered at her from over her bleeding, crimson wounds. Ragged bits of flesh, skin, bone, clung around the monster's lips and chin.

She cried out, screaming—and snapped awake, still bathed in sweat and gasping anew. There was a firm grip on her shoulder, shaking her. Light had infused the room now, gray sunlight from outside, it was dawn. When Rin blinked her eyes at this waking world and glanced upward, she saw a long red haori sleeve, white hair, and…

Golden eyes.

Screaming, she clawed ferociously at her attacker, fresh tears streaming down her face. He backed away, scowling and cursing at her, and it was then that she saw the creature's ears, swiveling like a dog's atop his head. She settled weakly onto the sweat soaked bed, breathing roughly.

"What the hell!" the hanyou was blustering, pointing his finger accusingly at her. "Kagome…"

"We told you not to wake her, Inuyasha!" the woman scolded him, frowningly. She was holding a tiny child, a toddler with the same golden eyes as its father, tightly against her chest.

Rin focused on that baby, feeling very suddenly weak. Her throat, her face, and her eyes all burned with growing pressure from grief. The words of the bickering couple were lost to her as she stared at the child. It was a girl; her robes were feminine as was her hairstyle. The toddler was staring wide eyed at Rin. The upper half of her face showed astonishment or curiosity, but the lower half showed uncertainty in the set of her lips, and perhaps anger in her jaw.

Fearfully, almost holding her breath, Rin moved her hand along her body. Her own daughter, so fragile and small, was held to her by her own skin—had her baby survived? Her hand found a lump but Rin didn't trust it. There was a lingering tightness and discomfort inside her. Occasionally she felt her abdominal muscles clench up, pulsing irritably. Weakly she shifted in the bed…and felt her heart start hammering with new vigor as she realized there was no wetness, no hot, sticky blood coating her sheets…

"My lady."

Rin looked up, startled, as a new voice spoke, reaching her through the background bickering of the hanyou and his wife. It was a priestess, dressed in red and white and knelt respectfully at her bedside. The priestess bowed slightly when she saw that she had gained Rin's attention, then she lifted a small drinking bowl from in front of her knees. "Drink this."

"What…" Rin's voice croaked with disuse and she fell silent, pawing at her throat at the disturbing sound.

"It is a mixture of herbs, my lady. It will help the child."

Rin reached out with her wavering hands for the bowl. The priestess placed it into her grip carefully and helped to guide it back to her mouth. Rin swallowed the thick liquid, squeezing her eyes tightly shut as she did so. In spite of her efforts to catch every drop, her clumsiness let a few short streams escape, bubbling and dripping from her jaw. The stuff was noxious and bitter, making her throat burn, but as long as the priestess pushed the drinking bowl at her, Rin took it in and swallowed as fast as she could.

As the priestess withdrew the bowl and started to get up, Rin tried to call out to her, but only succeeded in spitting a little of the medicine everywhere. Even so, the priestess noticed her attempt and halted, waiting expectantly as Rin tried to speak.

"My…baby…?"

The priestess smiled tentatively in the dull gray light and nodded her head. "You have slept for several hours and the child still lives."

Rin closed her eyes, a wave of fatigue swept over her, making her body shake. _Thank you…_

A male voice interrupted her fresh rush of relief. "How soon will she be able to leave?" he demanded.

The priestess answered calmly and with patience. "It will be several days at least, Inuyasha-sama."

"Dammit!" he cursed under his breath, and Rin heard and felt his footsteps as he moved through the room, heading for the exit.

"Inuyasha!" his wife hissed after him, scolding.

Slowly, Rin sighed, allowing herself to recall her surroundings, the circumstances to her arrival at her—well, essentially he was a brother-in-law. The disturbing image of her dream reappeared before her, making her cringe. She let her hand slip over her belly and turned her thoughts to the memory of the little girl sitting in Kagome's lap. Would her baby be born looking like that? Would she have Rin's appearance, and not her father's? The idea was comforting, but as Rin's abdominal muscles cramped up warningly, she bit her lip and forced her fleeting hopes away. The child had little chance of surviving to be as big as the toddler on Kagome's lap. Rin had suffered partial miscarriages before and overcome them only to lose the child a week later…

The priestess was rising to her feet, moving serenely away. Rin shook her feebleness off for a moment and tried to sit forward and clear her throat, drawing the other woman's attention. "Thank…you…"

The priestess halted and turned slightly, smiling thinly. "You are welcome my lady."

There were other things Rin felt the priestess wanted to speak, things brimming just inside the edges of her lips, but Rin's strength was fast abandoning her. She shifted her weight and curled up a little, tensing with pain for a moment, and then relaxing. The priestess left the room, her long red hakama pants swishing as she did so.

With the priestess gone, Rin could hear Inuyasha and his wife bickering in the other rooms, fighting over her future—or lack thereof—within their house. Rin longed to have the strength to join their fight, to speak for herself and stop Inuyasha from running his vicious mouth. She knew he likely took great joy in his brother's misery, but he wasn't about to be instrumental in it. The hanyou was nothing if not a survivor, but the same could be said of Rin. She would not be pushed easily from Inuyasha's home, not, at least, before she was ready…

* * *

"I don't understand you Inuyasha!" Kagome hissed, so angry that she'd closed her eyes, tight enough that there were crinkles around the edges like cracks in dry ground. Akisame was snarling in her arms silently, pawing at her mother's hands viciously, angry at the shouting and heated whispers between them and determined to get away or distract them.

"Yeah, same here!" he snapped, towering over her, leaning close into her face, taking up all of her world. He lifted one hand and pointed a finger, jabbing at their guest room where Rin was sleeping fitfully. "That bitch is Sesshomaru's and she's here running away from the bastard!"

"I _know_ that." Kagome pushed her face right back into his, stepping onto her tip toes to do it. "We can't just let her go, something could happen to her! We have to let her and her friend stay here and tell Sesshomaru that she—"

Inuyasha interrupted her, blustering wildly. "Are you fucking insane?"

Kagome pulled back, blinking at his latest outburst and scowling. "No…"

"If Sesshomaru finds out we're fucking keeping that bitch—he'll come after you!" though his words sounded angry still, Inuyasha's expression had changed, softening with worry and what might've been, though he'd never admit to it, fear.

Kagome pursed her lips, sighing. She bounced Akisame, stroking their daughter's long black hair. Akisame started to bawl then, turning and burying her face in her mother's chest. Kagome turnedaway from Inuyasha, shushing and cooing at her.

Inuyasha looked on, his facial muscles twitching, his ears folded backward. Kagome and he were at odds on Rin's appearance as well as on her fate. They could keep her with them, shelter her, and hide her away as she wanted inside their home, or they could send her away as soon as she could walk. Inuyasha of course favored the latter, and not because he was cruel or uncaring. Kagome favored the former option, pitying Rin in her situation and sympathizing with the girl. She understood what it was like to be the second woman…

"We can decide on this later." Inuyasha huffed, crossing his arms over his shoulders stubbornly. He moved forward then, reaching for Akisame. Kagome passed her off to him without hesitation and, with her arms freed; finger combed her long black hair, wishing vainly for something to tie it back with.

"She's like your sister, Inuyasha. That baby, it's your niece or nephew…" she murmured, sighing.

"Niece." Inuyasha informed her blandly. He was making a deep thrumming sound in his chest and rubbing Akisame's back. The toddler's eyelids grew suddenly heavy, her bawling ceased completely. "I'm going to put her to bed." He muttered and, with one last glare at his wife, he moved past her and toward the bedroom instead.

"_Niece."_ Kagome repeated after him, shaking her head, astounded. "How could you…?"

"Later!" Inuyasha snarled over his shoulder at her.

When he entered his bedroom, Inuyasha saw his son curled up and staring at him from their futon. His blue eyes were wide and Inuyasha smelled the rich salty stink of tears. He sighed tiredly and strode forward, sitting on the futon and reaching out to Koinu. The boy sniffled and scooted into his father's side, snuggling into him. Inuyasha touched Koinu's cheek and brushed over his ears and his hair tenderly.

"You were fighting with Mom." Koinu murmured. The words were muffled because his cheek was squashed against Inuyasha's side. "About the woman."

"Yeah, I was Koinu. But it's okay, don't worry about it." he tweaked his son's ears, making them flick and forcing Koinu to lift one little clawed hand, batting his father's touch away.

"Daaad…" he grumbled. Koinu lifted his head and peeked with a small smile at Inuyasha, expecting to see his father's usual warmth and affection, but when he saw the hanyou's face it was twisted into a silent frown and staring straight ahead. "What's wrong?"

Inuyasha blinked when he realized Koinu was watching him and cleared his features, relaxing visibly. "I'm just worried, Koinu." His fingers found their way to his son's head again and began stroking. "Go to sleep."

Koinu took this advice, snuggling into his father's side and closing his eyes.

* * *

The days passed. Inuyasha and Kagome kept a wary eye on one another, maintaining a silent war within the household. They slept in the same room every night, but spoke little to each other, and never directly about the stranger sleeping in their guestroom. Tsukiyume they housed inside their children's room, alone. Koinu and Akisame slept with them every night, as an extra safety feature. Shippo claimed fearlessness and slept in the children's room with Tsukiyume. The kit and the hanyou girl began a truce, the only one that existed within the household.

The priestesses acted as doctors to Rin, checking in on her, medicating her, and eventually, as Rin recovered, the younger of the two priestesses Hyakka, started to bond with her. It began simply with Hyakka making certain to bring Rin her favorite meals, and then progressed gradually until the young priestess was speaking of herself, her family, her life in the village, the old priestess Kaede who'd chosen her before she'd died some years ago. She spoke of her meeting with Inuyasha as a young girl before then. She could recall as far back as Inuyasha's release from Kikyo's spell pinning him to the God tree. She could remember Kagome's first appearance with them.

Rin, for her part, encouraged the talk only slightly, but she listened to it carefully, reading between the lines, learning always. Eventually she realized that Kagome was not a native, somehow, to their lands. Hyakka never revealed the specifics, and Rin wouldn't have guessed this unless Hyakka had let it slip. Kagome was otherwise perfectly normal, she wore kimono, she had the black hair of any Japanese woman, her features were normal. She didn't look like the forigners that Sesshomaru had occasionally had word of, or that Rin had read about in scrolls from the mainland. Perhaps Kagome was Chinese? Korean? But her Japanese was flawless, though with a few strange, new words…

Eventually Rin opened up, exposing her ignorance. As Hyakka moved about the room, opening the shutters on the window to cool the stuffy air, Rin asked, "Is…" she stopped, fighting to find a correct title for Inuyasha's wife. In the end she mimicked Hyakka, saying, "Kagome from the mainland? Is that how she knew to free…" she halted again, finding Inuyasha's title as Hyakka knew him. "Inuyasha-sama from the God tree?"

Hyakka paused, her hands on the shutters. Then, slowly, she smiled and shook her head. "No, Kagome is from another world. Inuyasha-sama says it's a different era, loud and full of people."

Rin stared straight ahead, unsatisfied with this explanation. Another era? What was that? Wasn't the world they were already in full of people? She pushed her curiosity aside and listened as Hyakka went on, speaking of the evil Naraku and his downfall. Rin knew this story; it was one she had lived through, one she had witnessed from afar. It was so long ago, like another world, another era to her. It was a time before she'd known she wa sin love with Sesshomaru, when she had only followed at his side or behind him, loving and loyal and…blind…

"Please…" she interrupted Hyakka, closing her eyes. "No more. I know this story."

Hyakka blinked at her, perplexed. She moved closer to kneel at Rin's bedside. "I'm sorry; I'd believed you were too young to recall this."

Rin smiled, allowing herself to enjoy the compliment. "I was a child."

"Yes…" Hyakka murmured, "Hmn." The priestess pursed her lips and cocked her head slightly, examining Rin while the other young woman had her eyes closed and couldn't see it. "Kagome believes you are family to Inuyasha-sama." She announced, watching pointedly as Rin's eyes snapped open and narrowed into a glare. "Is this true?"

"I have no family." Rin replied, bitterly. "I was orphaned as a child."

"And yet you are rich, lady." Hyakka observed keenly, "You were not left to live life as a beggar." She stared expectantly at Rin, adding, "You were cared for by someone."

Rin averted her eyes and tried to sit up and roll to the other side of the futon, to face the wall. Stubbornly, she said nothing.

Hyakka was persistent. She had heard nothing from or about Rin really since the young, mysterious rich woman had walked into their village and into Inuyasha's home, only to nearly miscarry her child. It was only fair to have what she'd overheard confirmed by Rin herself now that she was returning to her healthy, stubborn state. "It was the lord of the Western Lands, Sesshomaru, wasn't it?"

"Do not speak." Rin bit out, closing her eyes where Hyakka couldn't see the tears that were brimming in them.

"Inuyasha-sama's half brother." Hyakka finished, wonderingly. She stared at Rin's back, at the rich, silken under robe she was wearing. The priestesses had stripped her of her outer robes, rich and decorated as they were. This inner one was simple but elegant and carefully put together, a bright, shimmering peach color. The outer robes now hung at the end of the bed, and beneath them was the sword they'd taken from inside the robes where it was hidden. Inuyasha had spoken of the demonic power he could feel hidden in them…which had lead to another fight between he and Kagome over whether they would let Rin stay for any time at all.

"Don't speak." Rin repeated, and cringed at the sound of her voice, the thickness of it, the pressure in her throat and chest of unreleased tears.

Hyakka sighed lightly and rose to her feet. She gave a small bow that Rin couldn't see. "Hai." The priestess walked out of the small room, shutting the door as she left.

As soon as she was alone, Rin buried her face in her hands, breathing raggedly. She let a few of the sobs come again, tears leaking through her fingers. The sounds of footsteps in the hall made her sit up, swiping bitterly at the tears. Her strength had mostly returned and Rin was ready to leave the little room and its stuffy air. It was time for a bath, time for her to confront Inuyasha and his wife and to find Tsukiyume.

Rin snatched up her robes and struggled to put them on. Her legs were weak, shaking a little, but she ignored them. Dizziness fogged her brain, making her fingers clumsy and stars dance before her eyes. Her skin was sticky with old sweat, her hair messy and plastered to her scalp and neck. There was no doubt within her mind that it was time to go and reclaim some dignity.

She tied her obi clumsily, donning only one of her outer robes. She saw the edge of her sword, Hikitsuru, poking out from beneath her over robe, lying half on, half off the futon. They had trusted her with the weapon still inside the tiny room, right at her feet. And one of them, the kitsune boy, had seen its devastating power. Rin summoned her diplomacy teachings and knelt, brushing aside her over robe to grab up Hikitsuru's sheath. The blade made her feel powerful just holding it, and unlike most metal, it warmed at her touch at once, recognizing her as the one it had been forged for.

_I could offer one of my swords to Inuyasha…I could bargain for my stay…_

"What are you doing?"

Rin craned her neck around and looked at the door. It was closed, but there was a small crack, and through it Rin could see a bright green eye and reddish hair, crouched and watching her on the other side. Rin turned, kneeling, and slid Hikitsuru out from under the robe as she moved. The child on the other side of the door drew a breath sharply inward and moved away slightly. He respected the sword, and the woman handling it obviously.

Rin laid the blade out in front of her, letting him see it clearly through the crack in the sliding door. "This is Hikitsuru." She told him, gently.

"You uh," Shippo gulped, "You don't need that here…" Rin heard him shifting nervously outside the door; he didn't look in on her through the crack again. "It's a demon blade."

"Yes, like the Tetsusaiga." Rin murmured.

"I guess." The kit muttered back. He was antsy, uncertain of her and untrusting. He was ready to run away and scream for Inuyasha at any moment. But just as Rin opened her mouth to ask him to fetch the hanyou man of this household for her, the kit surprised her and took some initiative. "Sesshomaru gave it to you?"

Rin stopped, feeling her body stiffen and her heart pick up pace. The power that just his name had over her was too much. Rin frowned angrily and picked up Hikitsuru, moving it into her lap, longing for the power she'd felt just by touching it moments ago. "Yes." she answered shortly. "It was forged for me."

"Cool." Shippo responded, sounding only halfway genuine. "Why are you handling it? You know the Tetsusaiga does this thing with diamonds that can bust through anything…"

"I want you to go to Inuyasha and tell him I wish to barter for my stay here and for his protection." Rin interrupted, eyes closed, breathing deeply to maintain control.

"Okay." The kit scurried down the hall on all fours; Rin could hear his nails scratching over the flooring.

Hikitsuru was warming in her lap, flushing with heat. Rin stroked it without opening her eyes. She waited, serene, unmoving, as slowly footsteps came from down the hallway, the kit's four-legged romp and a bipedal thumping as well. The door slid open, clattering on its track. Rin opened her eyes and saw Inuyasha there, scowling. A shadow, crouched low, revealed the kit.

"What do you want?" Inuyasha grunted, crossing his arms over his chest. His ears flattened ominously.

Rin found herself drawn by his eyes. Honey-gold, the color of prosperity, wealth. In the highest courts the fusuma walls would be covered in gold paper and painted with ink. Gold eyes had surrounded Rin's life since Sesshomaru had rescued her from death with his sword. She had been reborn into a world of golden-eyed dogs.

She shook her head, bringing herself out of the reverie before too much time passed. Sliding Hikitsuru forward onto the floor, Rin ducked into a bow. It was a clumsy motion because of her prolonged bedrest, but Rin forced herself to rise smoothly, dragging her outstretched fingertips away from Hikitsuru, leaving it a foot away, ahead of her on the floor. "My sword, Hikitsuru." She announced.

Inuyasha glanced between her and the sword, blankly. "Yeah…?"

Rin gestured at the blade. "Take hold of it, if you would."

The hanyou knelt and reached forward tentatively. His clawed fingers paused just before they touched the blade. His attention was focused carefully on the sword, absorbed by it. He stayed in that position, fractions of an inch from grabbing the blade, but falling short, as if he were frozen in time. At last he lifted his gaze to Rin over the sword and his face rippled in a frown. "What are you trying to pull?"

Rin fought the knowing smile on her face and motioned again at the sword. "Touch it, Inuyasha."

The hanyou sneered and did as she asked, tapping his fingers against the sheathed blade. He hissed with pain when he made contact with it and ripped his fingers away, holding them in the other, uninjured hand. He glared at Rin and grumbled, "Bitch."

Rin ignored him. "Hikitsuru was forged for me alone."

"I'm not stupid." The hanyou snarled at her. He brought his injured fingers up and stared at them. The tips were bright red, burned. The blade had been red hot when Inuyasha touched it. Hikitsuru was designed to ward off others that attempted to steal it. It repelled Inuyasha's touch, just as the Tetsusaiga fended off Sesshomaru whenever he tried to touch it.

"This thing lets you and you alone hold it?" Inuyasha asked skeptically, "A human?"

Rin ducked her head, "Yes—but it is not the only sword that I have in my possession. On my horse I have many."

Inuyasha raised one eyebrow and snorted. "A little paranoid aren't you?"

Rin sat back on her heels, "Hardly. Tsukiyume and I were attacked while we were on the road. The provinces are in turmoil. There has been a great civil war in the Middle Lands…"

Inuyasha waved a hand at her, "Feh. Old news. What's your point?"

Rin took a deep breath to steady her voice. "I will trade you all the blades that you can wield in return for your protection and secrecy." She dropped into a low bow, the lowest she'd probably ever given him, "You are the only family I have, Inuyasha."

The hanyou shifted uneasily and rose to his feet. He stared down at her, scowling and torn. This was the first instance when Rin had presented herself to him in such a way, and with such an argument. When she'd arrived Inuyasha saw no benefit in it for him, nothing but his brother breathing down the back of his neck and trying to kill him, blaming him for the loss of his mate. Rin was nothing but a thorn in Inuyasha's side.

The idea of her swords was a tantalizing one. They would be powerful, like Sesshomaru's Tokijin in the past; no doubt all of them would be made with the incredible demonic power of that sword and of Hikitsuru now. Inuyasha could feel the pulse and power of the sword in front of him, between he and Rin as if it were an animal, a snake coiled and readying to strike.

And swords aside, her argument of family was one he couldn't deny. The scent of her unborn baby, his _niece,_ was influencing him though he hated to realize it. The inuyoukai were strongly family-oriented. Though few would guess it, one of Inuyasha's greatest fears would be loneliness. Like a real dog he was unfulfilled if he wasn't apart of a pack, if he didn't have a master, someone to watch over and protect. As a child it might've been his mother, and after his terrible, lonely years as an orphan, it was Kikyo and then Kagome. Like Rin he had been an orphan, like Rin his whole world had centered on first Kikyo and then Kagome and their friends. In many ways he was similar to her…

But Rin's situation could never be allowed to endanger his own, real family.

He snorted viciously, ears lying flat. "You think you can bribe me into letting you stay here?"

Rin rose out of her bow and cringed, as if he'd slapped her, or was about to. "I thought it an equal exchange." She replied, smoothly, though her face was beginning to reveal panic. She tried to cover it up, but Inuyasha could see it in her eyes.

"You ran away from my brother." Inuyasha said, pursing his lips and staring at her carefully. He noted the way she averted her gaze, the way her chin and lips puckered, trembling, when he mentioned Sesshomaru, even without saying his name properly. "Why did you choose me? Why not stay with Shimo-kun? Did you think I'd be stupid enough to take you in…?"

Rin flinched at his words, biting her lips. When he had finished she pinned him with a fierce glare. "I had nowhere else to go." She muttered, her voice shaking, "Shimofuri…he didn't want me there. Sessho…" she paused, swallowing and choking on her former lover's name, "He would know I was there. I had no choice. I couldn't stay in the Middle Lands."

"Well I agree with Shimo-kun. Sesshomaru will find you here and when he does…" Inuyasha knelt, lowering himself to be on Rin's level, sitting on the floor beside the futon that she'd spent close to a week in, recovering after her near-miss. The hanyou regarded her seriously, his golden eyes dark and heavy with emotion. "That bastard will tear us apart. I don't know if you'd noticed, Lady Rin," he chewed out her name sarcastically, "But I have a family to protect. I ain't gonna let you drag me into your little fight with my asshole brother."

"It's not a _little fight!"_ Rin spat, glaringly.

Inuyasha rose to his feet, scoffing. "You want my advice? Go back to him. Sesshomaru stops at nothing, just like our Old Man, just like me."

"I _will not!"_ Rin hissed, but she was starting to shake. Part of her longed for him, the weakest part of her, the part of her that still cried for her loss. The rest of her was hardened and cold, perhaps even cruel. She stared at Inuyasha's hakama, thinking furiously. Her hands quivered in her lap, ready to snatch up Hikitsuru and demand that Inuyasha allow her to stay…she tried to breathe and clear her mind, to think rationally…

"Your wife will listen to me." she muttered, half to herself and half in threat to Inuyasha.

The hanyou was starting to walk away from her, he'd turned his back on her, but now he halted, holding his breath. "Kagome doesn't enter into this…"

"I believe she would disagree." Rin murmured, starting to regain her calm.

Inuyasha growled to himself and stomped out of the room, as he passed Shippo he jabbed a finger at the kit and said, "Guard that bitch. If she comes out looking for Kagome—stop her."

Shippo yelped, hobbling out of the hanyou's way as he passed and sliding into the doorway. "Yessir." The kit stared at her somberly, making his face into a cold mask. "You can't talk to Kagome."

Rin let her lips fall into a cold, mirthless smile. She leaned forward and wrapped the fingers of one hand around Hikitsuru, pulling it toward her. "If you say so, young fox…"

Shippo's green eyes widened, his mouth fell open and closed, gaping like a fish and then closing off again. "You don't need that…"

Rin rose slowly to her feet, still holding the sword, carefully sheathed. It warmed against her hands, encouraging her. "You're right; I won't need it—if you step aside."

Shippo stared at her and gulped.

* * *

A/N: Next chapter…

"_Inuyasha lied to me many times about another woman, years ago." Kagome murmured, staring down at her hands clasped together neatly in her lap. "I was always sure that I came second place in his heart." Her face colored and she cleared her throat uncertainly. "I know a little of what it must feel like but I stayed with Inuyasha…"_

"_You believe I shouldn't have left." Rin filled in the rest of it for the miko. Her shoulders were beginning to shake; her gaze was narrowed and angry. "You can't understand my situation."_ _**All of the dead babies, all of the grief. Could you have stayed and pretended to be a saint and all the while wondered if he'd left you because you couldn't give him a child?**_


	20. Aishou: Sorrow

A/N: I repeat: **THIS IS STILL A SESS/RIN STORY**. Anyone asking me to "redo" things and get rid of Ginrei will only succeed in angering me. I have a busy life, with two weeks of much-needed vacation in California coming up. I am tolerant of a lot of critique, you can write in and say you hate Ginrei, I had someone tell me they wished Sesshomaru had killed her a few chaps ago…that is acceptable, it even amuses me. Telling me to rewrite it because you have lost interest? Not acceptable. I enjoy suggestions for the future of my story, in fact I encourage them since reader inpu. Feel free to write in with suggestions of what you'd like to see, how you want this story to end, in fact:

**Write in and help me people, I am a little lost. I wanted to keep Rin with IY and Kagome or somewhere away from Sesshomaru for a while, but I have trouble seeing it happening, he's not likely to leave her alone for very long. What are your thoughts?**

I recently read the most astounding _Inuyasha_ manga thing ever, I think. (SPOILERS! I warned you!) I ran across it while randomly looking at images my boyfriend sent me online from It was a picture of young Rin and Sesshomaru. I was intrigued. There was a link to the manga, scanned in and put online, fortunately translated too. I read it and discovered that Rin was dead. Of course I was shocked. I read around it and tried to get the background. There was also this female demon with light hair and the crescent moon on her forehead. Imagine my shock…Sesshomaru's MOM!!! So not only did Sesshomaru's mother, who we all assumed was dead, appear in these couple chapters of the manga, but also Rin dies and teaches Sesshomaru the meaning of compassion, or a real fear of death, not for himself, but for others. Tenseiga can only save a person once. When Rin dies after she's been swept into Hell accidentally, he cannot save her. Also, he cannot cry, but he fights for her, holds her close, and by all appearances was _very,_ very upset. FYI Sesshomaru's mother takes pity, and she seems to have some control over life and death too, and she brings Rin back with some tool of her own…anyway, very interesting.

Disclaimer: Nooooo I cry but noooooo ownership!

* * *

Last Chapter: Rin had nightmares as she slowly recovered from her near miscarriage. She did not lose her baby after all, at least not yet. Inuyasha and Kagome are fighting about what to do with Tsukiyume and Rin. While she was recovering, Rin began speaking to Hyakka, one of the priestesses. She appealed to Inuyasha, asking him to protect her and keep her secret in his household. She offered to trade her swords, forged as gifts from Sesshomaru, to him. Inuyasha refused, so Rin threatened to appeal to Kagome instead and Inuyasha left her under Shippo's watch.

* * *

**Aishou: Sorrow **

It was early; the sun had barely crept out from the eastern horizon. The shutters in Inuyasha and Kagome's bedroom were closed; the room was slightly stuffy and very dark. Inuyasha waited in the doorway, watching his sleeping wife. Kagome was wrapped up inside the covers, one child on either side, snuggled into her.

The scene was so gentle, loving, peaceful…Inuyasha wanted to ingrain it into his memory, to preserve it for the rest of his lifetime. He longed for one of the kam-er-uhs from Kagome's era that caught mirror-like images and froze them for all time. This scene was one Inuyasha had longed for most of his life. Comfort, security, love.

Footsteps came over the hallway floor, making one of Inuyasha's ears turn toward the sounds. They stopped in the same moment, and Inuyasha reluctantly turned his head around and found himself staring at Rin, whom he'd left moments ago under Shippo's watch.

He sighed and moved away from the doorway. "Dammit Shippo." He grumbled, glaring at Rin. "Get out of here." He snarled, "Kagome's sleeping."

Shippo came bounding down the hall, stammering apologies. "I'm sorry, Inuyasha! I tried to stop her but she has that sword…"

The kit's voice was too loud, Inuyasha heard Kagome stirring in their bed, heard one of their children whimper sleepily. He growled out in a low voice, "Shippo, shut up!"

But it was too late. From inside their room, Kagome's voice called out his name, thick and slurred with sleep. Inuyasha groaned, ears flattening as he stared at Rin. He stepped into the room, moving through the dimness to crouch down at her side. He began whispering to her, explaining shortly that Rin had tried to bribe him and he had turned her down. They began to bicker the moment Kagome started to rise, trying to speak to Rin herself.

"What the hell are you doing? Stay in bed with Aki and Koinu." Inuyasha snapped.

"You can stay with them. She isn't going to hurt me, Inuyasha." She slapped his hands away and Inuyasha growled, irritably.

As Kagome pulled herself out of the bed, slipping slowly past her husband, the hanyou snarled after her, "She isn't staying with us, dammit!"

Akisame started to cry and Koinu stirred, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. Inuyasha moved onto the bed and cuddled Akisame, sighing and frowning as defeat sunk in on him. He had lost this battle, but he figured he had yet to lose the war.

"Daddy?" Koinu murmured sleepily.

"What is it?" Inuyasha lifted his arm and pulled his son closer to him, tucking him against his side.

Koinu accepted this, yawning and wrapping one of his little arms around his father's waist. "Why don't you want that lady to stay?"

"Cuz it ain't our problem, Koinu." He replied, gruffly. "And believe me; we don't want it to be our problem. We want her gone. Your mother is just out of her mind, that's all."

"She smells like Auntie Sango does." Koinu remarked. With one cheek smashed to his father's side his words were muffled and slurred even more.

"That's because she's going to have a baby." Inuyasha stroked Akisame and adjusted her so that she was lying across his lap. The toddler fell almost at once back asleep, in spite of the quiet conversation going on around her.

"It smells like you, Daddy." Koinu murmured, his voice fading fast.

Inuyasha's fingers on Akisame stilled, he blinked several times and then let out a short, sharp breath. "Is that so?"

The boy nodded against him. "Yes."

Inuyasha waited, listening to his son and his daughter's breathing. They lengthened and steadied, becoming little puffs. Akisame squirmed in her dreams and eventually let out a tiny growl. Koinu's ears flicked lazily, as if scaring off a pesky fly. Inuyasha's own eyelids became heavy as he listened to his children and wondered about their dreams.

* * *

Rin presented Kagome with the same bribe of swords, but in this instance she didn't instruct Kagome to touch the blade—it wouldn't repel her in the same way it had Inuyasha. Kagome was drawn by the sword as well, staring at it silently for some time after Rin made her offer. She could feel the power inside the blade with her miko senses, and it troubled her that Inuyasha had apparently endured the same test—feeling Hikitsuru's power—and had still refused Rin's bargain.

At last she lifted her eyes and stared not at the sword, but at its owner, Lady Rin. "Inuyasha refused your offer?"

Rin nodded somberly. "He did." She bowed, touching her forehead clumsily to the matting of the sitting room where they'd taken their little impromptu business meeting. "I ask only for protection and secrecy. I wish to remain in your home without…" she choked on his name, "Sesshomaru's knowledge."

Kagome shook her head slowly, dismayed. "I don't understand…Inuyasha has been sketchy with me on this: _why_ did you leave him, and while you're pregnant?"

"I could not stay after…" she breathed in once, deeply, "Sesshomaru deceived me."

"Inuyasha lied to me many times about another woman, years ago." Kagome murmured, staring down at her hands clasped together neatly in her lap. "I was always sure that I came second place in his heart." Her face colored and she cleared her throat uncertainly. "I know a little of what it must feel like but I stayed with Inuyasha…"

"You believe I shouldn't have left." Rin filled in the rest of it for the miko. Her shoulders were beginning to shake; her gaze was narrowed and angry. "You can't understand my situation." _All of the dead babies, all of the grief. Could you have stayed and pretended to be a saint and all the while wondered if he'd left you because you couldn't give him a child? Could you have stayed when you knew he fought a whole war and killed a whole family to get one woman? Could you lie with that same liar at night, knowing that a week later he'll be with his "wife" using her like a breeder because you're just not good enough? Hanyou cannot be royal heirs…_

Rin began to cry silently, but she batted viciously at the offending teardrops as they escaped her eyes. Kagome watched her with pursed lips and furrowed eyebrows.

"How would you like a bath?" Kagome asked, her voice warm and gentle. "I'd heat the water. I'll even lend you some clothes. Those that you're wearing look like they need to be washed anyway." She smiled timidly, trying to infuse the room and the other, younger woman with warmth.

Rin nodded eagerly. "I am in need of a bath."

Kagome nodded and smiled brightly. "I'll go start the water and get you some new clothes." She started to get up and then paused, her lips pinching in on themselves. "You…wouldn't mind wearing something from my era, would you? Just until I've washed your robes…"

Rin hesitated, feeling both caution and curiosity. Kagome wasn't of their world. The word "era" baffled her again, but Rin hid the emotion and nodded with as much assurance as she could muster. She flicked her tears from moments ago away with force borne of irritation. "No, I wouldn't mind…"

* * *

Daken didn't bother touring the Middle Lands again. Sesshomaru had already been through them, wreaking havoc and destruction in his heartbroken, bitter loss. The old, grizzled inuyoukai worked with Sesshomaru's many spy networks, trying to learn of any hints as to the whereabouts of the runaway Rin. When this turned up nothing, Daken began fishing quietly with the other spies, spies for hire who had no loyalties, and then eventually he went on to researching the spies loyal to other lords, other clans.

The kitsune clans were the best for information, generally. They were small, often weak, and unseen. They might pose as a mushroom and wait, growing in a garden of a great lord, until some unwary servant murmured something that could be seen as valuable if it were to slip into the right, or perhaps, the wrong hands. Human samurai lords often employed kitsune youkai the most often, calling them sorcerers and cursing them for their black magic behind the fox demons' backs, but to their faces they were polite enough, and their pay was real.

The kitsune's loyalties, however, were not. The kitsune frequently betrayed their human employers as well as their youkai ones. In this way they avoided association to any one lord, human or youkai. They were not creatures who believed in dying for noble causes, unless it was for their own friends or family. They were simple at their core, selfish, and usually tricky.

The clan in the Middle Lands that often served Shimofuri and the other inuyoukai lords of the territory, was slightly different from other kitsune groups. They were established as relatively loyal. Shippo's ancestry led back to this group, which considered itself not as much trickster as survivor. By serving the Middle Lands more loyally than the other clans, these kitsune—the Aojiroi clan—had monopolized their services and ensured some small protection underneath the lords of the Middle Lands. They were unlikely to talk to Daken, recognizing him as something of an enemy spy. Daken didn't even try to break into their network. A number of them had been slaughtered by Sesshomaru when he'd come across them randomly in the wildernesses of the Middle Lands. They would be hurting and bitter, absolutely unwilling to help the spy of the one who'd killed them.

Instead Daken used the looser kitsune clans, searching for the saboteur that Sesshomaru believed had poisoned Rin. A kitsune named Kaiban eventually offered him information in simple exchange for Daken's own news on Sesshomaru's search for Rin. The rampage of the enraged inuyoukai lord of the Western Lands was common knowledge in the Middle Lands, but in the Western Lands it wasn't announced by the smoldering crop fields, or the graves of the dead. Daken allowed word to be spread of it—and what had caused it. The people, in spite of the devastation wrought just a stone's throw away in the Middle Lands, were clamoring for good stories. Those governed by the mysterious Sesshomaru would adore the story of his lovesick madness. They would condemn his bloodlust quietly and then withdraw into pity for his lost love. They would wonder about the mortal woman that had captured his heart in such a profound way, and then they would keep their own ears pealed for news of her.

Kaiban's information was seemingly insignificant. The kistune had been asked to provide a certain plant root, mashed and ground, to one of the cooks in Sesshomaru's main castle fortress, Nejiro. This was the castle where Rin and Sesshomaru had settled after becoming mates, it was also the castle where Rin had suffered miscarriage after miscarriage, unrelentingly. Although Kaiban had no idea what the root was used for once the cook got it, he understood that the information was important to Daken and refused to give up the cook's name unless Daken paid him with actual money and not just a trade in information. Daken refused the steeper price and left to investigate Nejiro directly.

There were several dozen chefs that had been shuffled about, coming and going over the years that Rin had suffered her miscarriages. When Daken reviewed the records of their employments, he was able to narrow the list of suspects into three different cooks that had actively been serving Rin in the years of her miscarriages. This narrowing was good enough for Daken—but it got better. One of the chefs had asked on several occasions to be switched from Nejiro to Jouka when Rin had left.

His name was Fumou, and, very briefly, he had been transferred to Jouka to serve Rin, but that had been just before she'd run away. Currently he was missing, having left Jouka with many of the other terrified servants when Rin had vanished with Shimofuri.

Daken switched his quest now for Fumou. The chef was a monkey youkai, from a weak, impoverished family. He had a flare for cooking, and his dexterous hands—which he possessed in both his humanoid form and his true youkai form—gave him an advantage in the kitchen equal to human chefs. His superior taste and sense of smell furthered that advantage. He was young, a new recruit to the business, and with his natural skills could likely grow rich, given time and effort.

But apparently Fumou, like many monkey youkai, had felt the itch of impatience. The money wasn't enough, so when he caught wind of an offer that involved a non-lethal poisoning of Lady Rin's meals, he took it. This increased his wealth at a faster, more monkey-acceptable rate.

Daken sent one of his trusted messengers, a distant relative, to give Sesshomaru the news. An edict would be issued; Fumou would become one of the Western Land's most wanted criminals. With Rin's disappearance the monkey had lost both sources of income, he was unlikely to stay hidden for long. He was probably already working again, perhaps for the very people that had hired him to poison Rin.

When Daken's messenger returned, his young inuyoukai nephew named Oushi, he was informed that when Fumou was found Sesshomaru wished to do the interrogation himself. Daken smirked nervously all day after the news arrived. Somewhere out there a monkey demon was doomed, and chances were he wasn't even aware of it. Sesshomaru was unlikely to take pity on the monkey for any reason. No amount of begging or pleading would dissuade Sesshomaru from exacting some small bit of revenge out on him.

As well as that news, Oushi also relayed the message to Daken that Kaiban, Daken's informant kitsune spy, was to be hunted down and slaughtered as well. Daken obeyed the order grimly, searching out Kaiban under false pretenses, telling the fox spy that he would pay for the chef's name, Daken had the kitsune killed and his head sent to Sesshomaru as evidence that the deed was done.

More and more, it was becoming apparent to Daken that Sesshomaru was ruthless, bordering on heartless, and perhaps a little off his rocker, thirsty for blood and vengeance. How long would this quieter hunt go on, he wondered, before all-out war would break out between the Middle and the Western Lands? How long until Shimofuri and Sesshomaru would go to war over Rin?

* * *

Rin regretted her decision that Kagome's clothes would be acceptable. Kagome's clothing was tight and constraining, it nipped into her skin uncomfortably. The pants she'd been given were made of a rough, thick blue fabric. They hardly stretched at all and adhered closely to her skin, form fittingly. The shirt Kagome provided was loose, long sleeved, and made of a light cottony material. Rin was accustomed to robes, multiple layers of the richness surrounding her, bathing her in it. The clothes Kagome gave to her were unlike anything she'd seen before, though they did give her more freedom to move her legs.

The bath had been strange as well. Kagome kept her own bathhouse in a room at the far end of her home. Rin hadn't expected such luxury in Inuyasha's home. He wasn't a lord; she hadn't expected him to live as if he were wealthy. Rin gazed with curiosity—as well as astonishment—on the tiled floor, the strange, smooth surfaces of the building materials. She wanted to ask what things were made of, where they'd come from, but found her voice had fled from her. Kagome's home humbled her into speechlessness.

The bathtub wasn't ceramic, porcelain, or metal or wood, but instead it was made of an off-white, hard, smooth substance that Rin couldn't identify. It was set against the far wall of the little bathroom, not rounded but rectangular in shape, and not as deep as what Rin was accustomed to. Kagome had guided her to the tub and pulled on a strange, shiny, sleek fabric that was suspended from metal hooks on a rod. When Kagome pulled on the bizarre fabric it slid with a gentle grating noise along the rod, curling its way around the inside of the tub.

"It's a shower curtain." Kagome told her as Rin battled to control her own awed, stupefied expression. "Of course we don't actually _have_ a shower, but…" Kagome trailed off, laughing uncertainly as she saw that Rin was still baffled beyond words.

Shower curtain? Curtain Rin could understand, shower she couldn't. Was it raining outside? The fabric was strange, Rin wondered what magic lied behind its sleek shine—why would Kagome leave this thing where it was, partly inside the tub, as if she wanted to get it wet?

Kagome pointed out another strange shape inside her bathroom. This one wasn't recognizable to Rin at all. It was white like the tub, and rose only about thigh level, if that. It was a mashing of shapes, the bottom was boxier as it rose out of the floor, the middle was rounded like a cup or a bowl, and the top was strongly rectangular, pushed back against the wall behind the odd contraption. The bowl part of the thing loomed open, but Rin couldn't see inside it. Rounded shapes lied against the top of the bowl, against rectangular tank behind it, like lids.

"That's the toilet. I'm sure you've never seen one but it's…" Kagome stopped, her face clouding with annoyance. "Inuyasha." She growled out and walked forward hurriedly to slam down the toilet seat, huffing. "This is where you go…" she smiled uncertainly, and then began to laugh lightly. "I was about to say potty."

Rin failed to catch the amusement in the strange word. The toilet and its purpose continued to elude her. "I don't understand…" she said, at last finding her voice again.

"Well this is where you go to…" Kagome's face colored and she cut herself off, rolling her eyes heavenward. Rin was younger than Kagome was but the young woman exuded stiffness and formality. The least formal thing Kagome had seen her do was cry at the thought of Sesshomaru. To explain the use of a toilet to her seemed horribly impossible. But the words she needed at last came to Kagome. "This is the privy, the outhouse. All of that."

Rin blinked, startled. She didn't possess Sesshomaru's fine sense of smell, but if she had she would've scented the very faint stench of the family's waste, the tentative system of pipes that tried to carry water for the toilet—surely the only of its kind in the Feudal era. She nodded wordlessly at Kagome, accepting all of the strange things around her wonderingly, almost as if she were a child again.

Kagome encouraged her to use the shower curtain if she was at all bothered by her presence, or if one of the children, Inuyasha, or Shippo had to stop in and use the "toilet." Rin tried the strange curtain but found that with it encircling the tub she felt claustrophobic, cut off from the world, trapped with only herself. That loneliness ate at her, and Rin pushed the curtain aside, refusing to use it again.

She sat in the cooling bathwater a long time, staring at the shower curtain, the "toilet" and the strange tiles. Kagome came and left again, bringing soaps and perfumes, a towel, and fresh water for the sink in case Rin or anyone else used the "toilet" and needed to rinse their hands.

Rin was a small woman; she'd never recovered in some ways from her earliest childhood as a starving orphan. When she stretched her legs out in Kagome's strange tub, her toes barely touched at the bottom before her head went under. She kept most of her head submerged like this for a time, wetting her hair and closing her eyes, trying to clear her mind. Her ears stayed underwater when she stayed still, she could hear her heartbeat, the gentle tinkling movements of the water, her joints and muscles grumbling when she moved even slightly, and even more amazing still, Rin thought she could hear a secondary beating in the water, the sound of her daughter.

It was this fascination that made her miss the commotion outside of the bathroom. Only Kagome's sudden appearance inside the bathroom brought Rin back from this world of sound. The door slid open loudly, clattering, and Rin sat up hurriedly, moving to cover herself instinctually even as she blinked away the water droplets and soap bubbles that had gotten into her eyes.

"Sorry." Kagome told her curtly and Rin watched as Kagome set a neat square shape onto the floor. It was like one of her towels that way, folded up carefully, but Rin could see multiple types of fabric and realized that it wasn't towels. "You can put this on when you're done."

From outside Rin heard Inuyasha's voice cursing irritably. "Hurry up Kagome!" beyond his complaining, it was also possible for Rin to hear the sounds of children crying. The sounds drew instinctually at her heart. Rin felt a jolt of something like panic. Her first thought was that Sesshomaru had found her and was attacking.

"What's going on?" she asked breathlessly.

Kagome looked up at her as she was about to slide the door shut again, but although it was clear to Rin that the other woman had heard her, Kagome made no response. She pulled the door shut, and Rin found herself shivering and alone inside the bathroom as the sounds of Inuyasha and Kagome's footfalls receded down the hall.

She stepped out of the bath, leaving the chilled bathwater inside the tub because she had no idea how to operate the strange drain, and toweled herself off clumsily. Maids had always helped her with this. They would cover her body with towels, they'd scrub over her skin, they combed her hair while it was still wet, they held up her robes for her as she slipped them on. They even tied her obis and styled her hair. Now Rin was taking care of herself, and feeling as clumsy as a child.

When she pulled out the folded clothes Kagome had left her, Rin was baffled anew. The sounds of the crying children outside continued to pull on her, leaving her no choice but to put on the clothes, however strange they were. The underwear she grasped the purpose of at once, the pants and the shirt came later. She thought Kagome had made a mistake when she saw the pants, as well as another bizarre bit of white fabric: two cup-like shapes connected by straps and strings of fabric. Surely Kagome had given her the clothes of a peasant? She had no idea what to do with the white scrap with its cup-shapes, so she tossed it aside. Her hair was dripping wet when she emerged from the bathroom; Rin had never tied a towel around her head before, or draped it over her shoulders. She hadn't made an effort to dry her hair at all. At any rate, however uncomfortable her dripping hair was, the crying drew her curiosity more.

Tsukiyume was in the hall outside the bathroom, seemingly waiting for her. The hanyou girl was timid but pleased to see her. Kagome had provided Tsukiyume with clothes as well—but this was something Rin recognized. A simple green kimono with a yellow under robe. "Lady Rin!" her orange eyes widened as she saw Rin's odd clothing.

"Tsukiyume." Rin felt her shoulders drooping a little with relief, dropping her tenseness. Tsukiyume was one ally in all of this. She moved close to the hanyou girl, longing to hug her on some level while at the same time wishing to remain strong, distant, and reserved as if she were in court. "What's going on?"

"I was out with the kitsune Shippo when some children came to the gate." Tsukiyume's ears flattened, she swallowed nervously. "Two of them I've seen before, with the monk we met on the road—his sons."

Rin frowned, remembering the monk and his sons. "They were so young and already he had them out killing people." She muttered, sourly. Her hands crept to her belly, where her daughter was miraculously still nestled safely inside her, beneath the uncomfortable clothing Kagome had given her. It infuriated Rin to think that the monk could risk his sons in such a way, expose them to such harsh things at their young age. How could he be so careless with something so precious as one of his children? Didn't he know that in some instances a child was an unattainable gift, an impossible blessing? She cocked her head, listening to the crying sounds of the children, once in a while interrupted by Inuyasha or Kagome's voices. "Has one of them died, or the monk?"

Tsukiyume shook her head, seeming to shrink. "No."

There was something inside the hanyou girl's tone, in the way she flinched, as if afraid to stare at Rin directly, that told Rin that she knew what was wrong, and it would somehow be unpleasant for her to hear. "What is it?" she demanded, a little stronger this time.

Tsukiyume's jaw clenched. "Their mother, as I understand it, sent them away."

"Why?"

"She has lost her latest child."

Rin didn't react to the words, but her eyes lost their focus, glazing over. Her first thought, instinctually, was: _What have I done…?_

* * *

After sending Daken on his first mission of revenge, Sesshomaru wandered the Western Lands for nearly a week, listlessly. His thoughts were scattered, his emotions cloudy and muddied. He tried to go to Nejiro to continue meeting with the various retainers and other dignitaries, to resume his role as the lord of the Western Lands, but the memory of Rin was too much. Her spirit waited in the halls, and Sesshomaru could never sleep in his room, Rin's was too close by, as were the many memories of their lovemaking. And beyond those memories there was also the grief. Nejiro had seen all of Rin's miscarriages.

Before leaving Nejiro behind, and ordering his meetings to be scheduled elsewhere once a week, Sesshomaru visited the small Shinto and Buddhist shrines of the castle. They were controlled by humans, for humans. Youkai generally didn't believe in either system of religion, choosing instead to squabble amongst themselves and to focus on their existence in the here and the now. The afterlife was a useless idea and place for most of them.

Sesshomaru had never bothered with these places before. His presence in both small shrines caused a small panic as priests and monks filed into their ranks, bowing before him. The Shinto shrine here was staffed only by priests and by priestesses who took care of it, keeping records and other monotonous things. There were no mikos or monks gifted with spiritual powers. Sesshomaru had made certain of this himself. A youkai that invited in mikos and monks that had the powers to possibly harm or purify him just wasn't a smart move. These priests, priestesses, and monks were all accustomed to serving the humans that served the inuyoukai lord. Whatever they believed about youkai, they kept it private and performed their duties diligently. Sesshomaru had always been satisfied with that, he allowed the humans their beliefs.

But now he was entering their shrine, their temple. In the Buddhist temple there was a statue to the Kannon representing prosperity, the harvest; good fortune…Rin would've liked the temple. Sesshomaru stared at the statue in its position of serenity. One hand was in its lap, the other lifted in some gesture that Sesshomaru didn't care to interpret. Its face interested him most. A small, openhearted smile graced its face. Its robes flowed gracefully and naturally.

Sesshomaru tried to imagine Rin kneeling before the statue, tried to imagine her thoughts, her wishes. He knew they were almost certainly about her lost children. _Aishou_, she had named one of them, _Sorrow._ It summed up his feeling about every one of those lost children. But there were other words that could be added to them: Loss, failure, humiliation. Ironically, those words also described his feeling about Rin's running away.

He left the temple without a word to any of the monks or to the priests in the Shinto shrine. In the same hour he left Nejiro, unable to spend even a night inside the cursed castle.

The next place he chose was small, but well fortified: Insen. It was built along the ridge of a mountainside in the middle of the highest mountains that crossed the Western Lands. Sesshomaru retreated to those mountains, roving them alone. He neither ate nor slept. Neither was required for him to survive, at least not right away.

In the stillness of the mountains, in the lushness of the summertime forests, Sesshomaru could bury the fury and the pain that lived inside him, for a time. Stubbornness and pride had brought an end to his rampage, and helplessness had stopped him from sending out every human and youkai under his command to go looking for Rin. He waited in the Insen for word from Daken and from Naishougoto if it should come. In the back of his mind the idea of killing Ginrei still lurked, but for now grief and _loss_ had transformed him, forcing him into inactivity.

Most painful of all was the thought that Rin was still carrying a child, or at least she had been when she'd left. It was only a daughter, and a hanyou at that, unable to take the Western Lands as an heir, and barely recognizable as royalty—but _apart of him._ Miscarriage after miscarriage had made Sesshomaru jaded and wary of his own offspring, from either Rin or Ginrei.

But the thought of Rin away with a stranger, carrying _his pup,_ it sickened him on a deep, primordial level. The inuyoukai in him wanted to guard her, to watch over her and the child. He wanted to take in her scent, rich with the life inside her, to smell and see it developing. Most of all, he wanted to see Rin's happiness as she at last became a mother. He wanted to see his daughter's face, to search for a reflection of Rin's features and his own inside her tiny newborn face.

What was Rin thinking, taking his daughter away from him? What was she _thinking_, risking her health and the child's? The power an enemy, like Shimofuri, would have over Sesshomaru if they threatened Rin or the child…

Spring mists rolled in over the Insen castle, created by the contrast between the moist heat of the lower altitudes below, and the cooler, drier air of the mountains. Sesshomaru met with Daken's messenger Oushi and learned of the kitsune that had provided the herbs to poison Rin, and of the cook Fumou that had committed the deed. There was only one missing piece of the puzzle, the employer. The being responsible for the passage of money that started the entire process. The kitsune and Fumou were just pawns in some larger criminal's mind, but Sesshomaru would make sure all of them died for their crimes.

_Aishou_ would be avenged.

* * *

The atmosphere inside Inuyasha and Kagome's home changed dramatically after the arrival of Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai with the news that Sango had suffered a miscarriage. The demon slayer had been pregnant with her fifth child, another boy by Inuyasha's reckoning, and she'd been far enough along that the miscarriage was dire. Her body rejected the child growing within her, making Sango enter an early labor that was painful on multiple levels.

Tsukiyume was pushed out of the children's room, as was Shippo, to leave room for Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai. Now she and Shippo stayed in the same room with Rin. Kagome disappeared for a time and reappeared with more bedding from "her era." The three children slept in the same bed, squished together but seemingly happy enough.

With Shippo and Tsukiyume with her now, Rin began to hear more stories from the kit. She was grateful for it, they distracted her from the lingering fear she had that soon she would miscarry as well. It was as if she had a curse on her head. As silly as it was, Rin felt an impulse to bow before this demon slayer that she'd never met before—at least not that she could recall—and beg her forgiveness.

Inuyasha was, for a time, distracted enough that he forgot about Rin's unwelcome presence in the house. Kagome, meanwhile, had her hands full with comforting the children—her own as well as Sango's—and with her usual chores. Tsukiyume and Shippo offered themselves up to help her, and gradually they could be seen hauling water, scrubbing floors, or slicing food just as much as Kagome.

Rin, meanwhile, longed to join them, but she knew next to nothing about ordinary housework. She saw Shippo, Kagome, Tsukiyume, Inuyasha, and even some of the children going about the mundane chores of everyday life, and found herself dizzied, helpless and pathetic. She had been taught needlework, but never how to scrub. She could read and write more than Inuyasha could she suspected, but she couldn't for the life of her know how to sharpen a sword or even a simple kitchen knife. Even the children's cries confounded her. Akisame in particular she was drawn to, but if she were to reach out to the child or attempt to speak to her, Akisame fled, or one of her parents was there to scoop her up and take her away from Rin protectively.

For a few days she was bored and embarrassed at her lack of activity. She made up the bedspreads inside the room that she, Tsukiyume, and Shippo shared, but when she moved to do the same inside the children's room Inuyasha found her and forced her back into her confinement.

A storm moved in, the daylight outside was sullen and gray. Rainfall woke Rin. Tsukiyume and Shippo were already up, murmuring quietly to one another. The hanyou girl and the kitsune boy had bonded, becoming fast friends. Tsukiyume was also more accepted by the household, she was freer. She was genetically related to Inuyasha, and though both of them would've denied it, that relation _did_ play a role in their interactions. Rin knew it to be true of inuyoukai, over and over again.

It had been over two weeks since Rin had recovered from her illness and she felt nothing but frustration at her confinement, at her uselessness to the household. Rin wasn't lazy, but she had been spoiled. Now, in the dull light of the morning as the rain padded down on the eaves outside, Rin could hear Shippo murmuring in a low, careful voice, gossiping. She strained her ears, feeling her heart pick up painfully when she caught Sesshomaru's name mentioned.

"…he says everyone is talking about it in the Western Lands. And the refuges from the Middle Lands confirm it. Sesshomaru went on this wild attack, killing people left and right in the Middle Lands. The refugees don't know why, they only guess who it is until they hear the story that's floating around."

Tsukiyume shifted on her bed, glancing back to where Rin was sleeping in her futon, her back turned toward them. "What story?"

"In the Western Lands everyone knows that Sesshomaru is heartbroken, and that Shimofuri is responsible. He kidnapped Rin." Shippo whispered this but somehow managed to deliver it dramatically.

"Shishi-sama would never do that!" Tsukiyume hissed with anger.

"People don't know the truth." Shippo agreed with her calmly, "They like to think of lost loves and all that junk."

"Not betrayal and revenge." Tsukiyume added, sighing quietly. "I don't know how any of this will end." Her voice had become higher, near almost to tears. "I'm afraid for my brother…"

Rin tried to control her heart, fearing that Tsukiyume or Shippo would hear it. Her face was hot; her body broke out in a sweat. Her fight with Sesshomaru had become public? The thought of people whispering her name in some false fairytale lie sickened her. At the same time she feared others knowing the truth that she hadn't been taken, but had left willingly. Her name would never recover if that bit was known and not _why_ she'd done it. She wondered what would become of Shimofuri as well, and Inuyasha's family too. Her presence endangered anyone that kept her with them.

Was there really nowhere for her to go, nowhere that she could escape and be free from Sesshomaru's clutches? Everything she had was Sesshomaru's. She even owed him her life multiple times over.

And yet, because she had come to rely on him so much, his betrayal hurt that much more, and it left her helpless without him. Was her only choice to return to him? What would Sesshomaru do if she did abruptly return to him?

She closed her eyes, trying to drown out all of those thoughts. She imagined the bathwater again, imagined being mostly immersed in the water, hearing nothing but her own body's sounds. Sleep stole over her again, letting her doze through the rest of Tsukiyume and Shippo's whispers.

* * *

A/N: for next time…

"_What?" Tisoki demanded indignantly. "That's what Uncle Inuyasha calls him!"_

_Kohimu nodded, backing his younger brother up. "He's right. Koinu, your dad thinks your uncle is an asshole." _


	21. Fumou

A/N: ho hum. Dee dumb. Work, work, work. I'll be honest with you all…my plan was to have Rin stay out and about away from Sesshomaru until her baby is born. I wanted this because I have this image of a messenger delivering Shimofuri the news and then Shimofuri actually telling Sesshomaru of this daughter that he's never seen because Rin denied him that, as a last, bitter blow. In writing it I realize how hard that will be because Rin has some months to go since this is spring and she probably isn't due till like September or something. Sesshomaru is unlikely to sit by that long. So…write in if you wish and advise me, I likely need it because as with most stuff I write, this story had no real planned ending…and still doesn't. As I am on vacation, though, I've hardly been able to write anything, so it will be a bit before you see the next chapter. I had this one waiting in the wings.

Disclaimer: Nope…

* * *

Last Chapter: Rin is struggling to find a place, if possible, inside IY and Kagome's home. So far it seems unlikely. Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai arrived upset and with news that Sango suffered a miscarriage in her latest pregnancy. Daken has made headway in the search that Sesshomaru charged him with. He found a kitsune that revealed the poisoning and a monkey youkai cook that did the poisoning. Now all that's left is whoever was paying them. Sesshomaru settled in a different castle, the Insen, unable to stay at Nejiro where he and Rin became lovers and where she suffered so many miscarriages. The rumor spreading on the wind is of a twisted love story: Shimofuri stole Rin away and now Sesshomaru is on the warpath to reclaim his lost lover.

* * *

**Fumou**

Rin escaped her confinement, at last, quite by mistake. She had taken another bath in Kagome's strange bathroom and emerged to hear the home unusually quiet. Dimly, Rin could hear Kagome's voice murmuring from the sitting room. She walked cautiously out into that room and stopped, seeing that Kagome had settled all of the children around the table where they normally ate their meals. They weren't eating now, they were learning.

Once more Kagome startled Rin—she had never expected Inuyasha's wife to be knowledgeable, but the proof of it was right in front of her. Kagome had drawn several kanji characters out on the table for the children. The paper that she used was bright white and appeared clearer than any of the rice paper Rin had used in her own studies. Kagome moved between the children, studying their progress as they learned the intricate ways of curling the brush to form one leg of the character, and then the harsh, deep dab to begin it and the lessening toward the end…it was calligraphy in a way that Rin had never imagined Kagome had been taught.

Cautiously, Rin moved closer, sitting in the background, watching the scene. Kagome could see her where she sat, but she made no attempt to shoo her away, merely headed on with her quiet, patient voice, instructing the children.

The older children, Kohimu and Tisoki, sat at one end. They studied several small kanji that Kagome had drawn for them. The brushes they handled with a grace borne of several years of practice already. Tisoki lifted his eyes and caught sight of her. He smiled at her timidly, and Rin returned it, seeing the remnants of grief hiding in his eyes. She watched him, feeling a lump of pain building inside her throat, a growing sympathy for the three children of the monk and the demon slayer. She understood all too-well the pain that the family was feeling, losing one of their own in blood before it had even begun to live.

Rin laid her hands over her daughter, praying that this one would survive to birth and beyond, that one day Rin might act as Kagome was now, passing on power to her child in the form of knowledge.

Kasai, Koinu, and even young Akisame were included in this lesson. Their kanji characters were larger and fewer in number. Akisame mimicked the image on the paper, but her strokes turned from readable characters to actual pictures. Soon a childish black inked outline of Koinu emerged, then one of her mother and of Inuyasha as well. When she started to dab her fingers in the ink, and then to bring the brush to her mouth to chew it, Kagome stepped in and pulled the toddler away from the sitting table.

With Akisame cuddled in one arm, Kagome ended the children's calligraphy lesson and started a new one that piqued Rin's interest immediately. Kagome took away the blank white sheets and instead placed a thinner, flimsier paper before the children. Unlike the paper from moments ago, this was lined with faint blue ink horizontally across each page. Kohimu and Tisoki began to complain.

"Aunt Kagome!" this was Kohimu, jaw clenched and his lower lip thrust outward, pouting. "Why are you teaching this again?"

"You said we're never going to use it." Tisoki added, whiningly.

"You don't have to learn it if you don't want to." Kagome sighed, tiredly. "But if you leave you have to watch Akisame for me."

Kohimu sighed, putting his elbows on the table and leaning forward exasperatedly. He was acting difficult, fighting and squabbling, but when he stared ahead with what appeared to be anger, Rin could read grief in his features. His brown eyes shone a little too much, a little too wetly. He was near to tears.

Wordlessly, Kagome began to hand out little rods that ended in a point. The children took them up in their hands like chopsticks. Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai did this awkwardly, frowning with concentration. Koinu, meanwhile, took up the little rod with great dexterity and confidence. He had been learning this longer than Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai. Even Akisame squirmed, trying to get back to the table. Kagome allowed this, even providing the little girl with a little yellow rod of her own.

Rin squinted as Kagome laid another of these blue lined pages down in the middle of the table. This one had symbols on it that weren't kanji. They meant nothing to Rin, they were completely foreign. She leaned forward, watching carefully, trying to comprehend what lesson Kagome was giving the children.

As the children began to copy down the symbols, row by row, with exquisite care, Kagome moved silently over to Rin and sat at her side. Rin tensed and continued to stare straight ahead at the children. She feared what Kagome would say to her. If Kagome asked her to leave then she wasn't sure at all how she could continue to stay against both Inuyasha and Kagome's wishes.

Somehow she found the courage to speak. "Where is Inuyasha?"

"He left to escort our friends here." Kagome answered, quietly.

"The children's parents?" Rin asked, uncertainly.

Kagome nodded. "Yes."

"And Tsukiyume and Shippo?"

"I sent them to the village for me." she paused, smiling slightly. "Shippo already learned a lot of this years ago. I used to teach him about it when we had nothing else to do and we were looking for Jewel Shards or Naraku."

Rin nodded, slowly finding that she could overcome her fears and look at Kagome directly. "I…" she stopped, stumbling nervously, afraid of offending this woman that had been so kind to her, in spite of her husband's none-too-subtle doubts. "I didn't know you knew so much…" she felt her cheeks burning with color and turned her face away, focusing on the children again.

Kagome chuckled a little. "In my era everyone learns this. I want Koinu and Akisame to know it too. Inuyasha might be a lost cause, but my babies aren't."

"He won't learn?" Rin asked, smiling haphazardly.

"He figures he knows enough." Kagome sighed, smiling fondly. "Reading and writing never helped him survive. He can do it, but he doesn't want me to teach him any more."

"When his son can read more than he can, he might sing a different song." Rin replied, smiling with real amusement at last.

Kagome nodded, her eyes brightening. "That's what I thought too."

Koinu lifted his head then, ears swiveling. "Momma," he called her informally, "We're done with the letters."

Kagome nodded and started to rise, but Rin followed her with her eyes attentively, and opened her mouth, blurting, "Lady Kagome…"

The young mother stopped and glanced over her shoulder at Rin on the floor quizzically. "Yes?"

"Will you teach me about that—" she gestured at the strange horizontal lines and the letters inside them on the table. "I've never seen it before and…I could help teach the kanji, or poetry, or…"

Kagome nodded, her expression brightening. "Of course. The boys might learn better from you anyway." Her voice dropped, though it was unlikely that the children missed her words anyway, "I'm sure they already have a crush on you anyway, being Miroku's sons."

"I can't hold this!" Kasai burst out abruptly, and dropped the little yellow rod from her right hand, then she started to cry in little sobs.

Kagome moved swiftly away from Rin and back to the table to comfort the little girl. Koinu had dropped his writing tool as well, but not from frustration. As part inuyoukai he had developed differently from Kasai and, although several months younger than her, he had the dexterity of a much older child. His fine motor skills made for exceptional handling of the brushes and pencils that Kagome provided and encouraged him with. He was better even than Inuyasha, who, in spite of his seemingly brutish nature, was surprisingly gifted with a brush in his hand.

Underlying Koinu and Kasai's lessons there was a rivalry, a mostly silent war brought on by their closeness in age. They were both striving to outshine the other in whatever they did. In the writing lessons Koinu had a natural advantage. Now Koinu hugged Kasai childishly from behind, snuggling into her dark hair. "It's okay, Kasai."

Angrily, Kasai pushed at him. "Get off!"

Kagome separated them with great frustration and then was pulled from the fighting by a squalling Akisame. Rin moved in nervously while Kagome was settling her daughter. She sat at one corner of the table awkwardly. When she looked up timidly, it was to see all of the children's eyes one her, each displaying their own reaction. Kohimu and Tisoki gazed at her with their warm, earthy brown eyes, wide and fascinated. Kasai was still wiping away her tears angrily, and her violet gaze was bitter and skittish. Koinu stared at her with his own blue eyes, cocking his head to one side with curiosity. His ears were turned toward her alertly.

"Momma says you're like my aunt." Koinu told her keenly. His gaze was bright and intelligent, like his mother's. Also, unlike his father, he possessed an open, warm expression. He hadn't been jaded like Inuyasha had, he'd never been taunted or teased or abused for his ancestry.

Rin wasn't sure what to say. Feeling the weight of this "nephew's" gaze, and that of the rest of the children, Rin slowly nodded.

Koinu squirmed a little, revealing his excitement at her admission. "So you know Daddy's brother?"

"Asshole uncle." Tisoki added, grinning widely. "Koinu's asshole uncle."

Rin found herself torn. Her face burned, a hollow feeling started in her stomach. Part of her, the part that still loved Sesshomaru, wanted to scold Tisoki, but she hardly knew the boy, and hardly felt that she could defend Sesshomaru without opening herself up to the feelings of pain and loss that were buried inside her, always waiting to erupt onto the surface if she let them. At the same time she felt she couldn't nod and agree with the boy's words. It was an insult to her, and to Koinu. She saw the little boy turn and glare disapprovingly at Tisoki, saw his tiny ears flatten.

"What?" Tisoki demanded indignantly. "That's what Uncle Inuyasha calls him!"

Kohimu nodded, backing his younger brother up. "He's right. Koinu, your dad thinks your uncle is an asshole."

Kagome interrupted them, scolding harshly. "Stop saying that! You know it's a naughty word—you know Akisame is too young!" angrily, Kagome pointed at the horizontal symbols on the lined paper in front of them all on the table. "Tisoki, Kohimu, recite your alphabet now!"

They groaned and began it slowly, concentrating. "A, b, c, d…"

Rin forgot her embarrassment, fascinated by the strange symbols, by the sounds of language they represented. Wordlessly, as she saw Rin's fascination, Kagome slipped a lined piece of paper in front of her and passed one of the small yellow rods to her. Rin smiled and murmured her thanks, but as she looked from the symbols, to the children reciting the strange "alphabet" to the paper and strange writing tool in her hands, she realized that this new thing would be just as bizarre and different to her as housework, as the "toilet" and shower curtain in Kagome's bathroom. It was another thing to file underneath the list of "from Kagome's era" wherever that was.

When Inuyasha returned a day later with a morose, somber Miroku and Sango in tow, he discovered that Rin had replaced Kagome as a teacher. She taught the children their Japanese kanji, and what she knew of the Chinese characters as well. She cared for the children, which allowed Kagome to busy herself elsewhere or to rest for an hour or so before she began their English lessons. The English lessons boasted new students now too: Rin had taken up the language to pass more of her time, and Tsukiyume and Shippo had followed her.

* * *

Messengers moved between Sasugainu and Shimofuri. A meeting was arranged on neutral ground, in Arasoizuki's now leaderless province. The inuyoukai arrived in smaller dog form, one young, strong, and blue-gray, the other the palest white. They were clearly kin; the streaks over their cheeks were the same rich blue-green turquoise. It had been the same color that Taikokajin had sported while she lived.

The day was overcast, the sky an ugly gray. Mists rolled over the hills and through the woodlands around them. The pine trees swayed although there was no wind close to the ground. This was weather that favored Sasugainu's coloring. In his true form he could slip away into the whiteness of the mists, fading like an incorporeal ghost.

Both had worn their swords to the meeting, and both were stoic, though their postures revealed great anger.

Shimofuri started first, saying coldly, "You betrayed me." after a microsecond of a pause, he added, "_Uncle."_

Sasugainu stiffened up even more so, though it hardly seemed possible. His nose was thrust almost haughtily into the chilly spring air. "You took leave of your senses, _Nephew."_

"It has not failed yet." Shimofuri returned brusquely. "It might well succeed. I have Lady Rin, and Sesshomaru has left the Middle Lands."

"She is as crazy as you are." Sasugainu spat, heatedly.

"Those words," Shimofuri murmured calmly, "Coming from you, means nothing. Uncle, you have let Sesshomaru cow you with fear. You have been broken. You dishonor me."

"Madness! _You_ dishonor _me!"_ Sasugainu snarled, and then, abruptly, the anger left him, his shoulders sagged. Even the lines in his face softened. For a time he was silent, gazing at his nephew almost as if he had lost his mind, as if Shimofuri had become a child that needed the guidance of a parent. At last he shook his head, speaking so quietly that Shimofuri leaned forward, straining to hear it above the whispering, sighing of the trees. "I don't want you to die, Nephew."

Shimofuri took a step back, frowning briefly. "Your actions do not indicate such."

"If you return his bitch, Sesshomaru is certain to pardon you. If you continue on this path, the only resolution is war and death." He pursed his lips. "After Nishiyori, after the panther demon invasion, I have seen enough of that in my lifetime."

"I doubt returning Lady Rin will change his views toward me." Shimofuri muttered grimly. "He will most certainly punish me, if not kill me. He could depose me, take the Nanka from me. Or…" he frowned bitterly, "Tsukiyume again, forever this time." He shook his head and his hands clenched into firm fists, his resolve hardening. "No, I have no choice but to go on, Uncle. You can either assist me or betray me, it is your choice."

Sasugainu scowled, stepping forward and lifting his hands in a pleading motion. "I have sworn allegiance to Sesshomaru!"

Shimofuri was unmoved and unimpressed. "You are sworn to allegiance with me by blood." he stared down his uncle, his lips pressed into a thin, bitter line. "Your allegiance to Sesshomaru is one of fear and your own dishonor."

"Brought on by your madness!" Sasugainu shouted, letting his fury rise to the surface. "You must give him back his mate. _You must!_ Call on him for mercy. Draw it up in writing that you will return her to him if only he will spare you…"

Shimofuri shook his head. "He would kill me rather than agree. I'm sure he isn't waiting for me to bring her back. He is searching her out, even as we sit here talking."

"Where is she?" Sasugainu blustered, desperately. "We can return her together and plead his forgiveness."

Shimofuri's eyes narrowed. "I will plead with no one." He turned his back on his uncle, scowling disgustedly. "You may tell Sesshomaru of my decision." He turned his eyes toward the sky, sighing slightly. "I will send him word if Lady Rin should feel she has something to say to him, of course."

"Madness!" Sasugainu shouted, beating at the air in frustration as Shimofuri's form wavered before him, becoming a large blue-gray dog instead. "You and that stupid bitch, both of you gone mad! What will it accomplish, Nephew? You are my sister's heir with no one to replace you! Useless fool, throwing your life away!"

Shimofuri didn't answer him, only looked back over his shoulder once, pink tongue lolling, and then bounded away over the hills, dashing into the thick mists and into the shadow of the trees where at last he became invisible. Sasugainu hesitated before turning back toward his home. He stood still and in a slumped, defeated posture.

_It is suicide, Nephew…_

* * *

Miroku and Sango stayed in the children's room with Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai after their arrival. Their youngest son, Masuyo, filled the house with his cries. Sango was subdued, sickly, and weak. The loss of her latest baby had been a hard blow. Never before had she had to endure the pains of labor only to see her child emerge limp and dead. In a way she considered herself luckier than if she had birthed the baby as a full term stillborn. In that case she could've seen the child fully formed, she could've carried the child longer inside her, thinking of its inevitable arrival.

And yet the horror stayed with her. The pains of labor, the bloody mass that was her baby and yet wasn't. She had begged Miroku and the midwife to allow her to see the child, half-formed as it was, but the midwife had insisted that Sango not be exposed to such horrors. The child was covered and hidden from her. Sango counted it as being like Kohaku, a part of her family whose fate ultimately she couldn't control, and who she'd never been able to properly say goodbye to.

It was only one of the many traumatic things that had happened within her relatively short lifetime, and Sango was stronger than anyone would've guessed—unless of course they'd seen her battling demons with hiraikotsu. She held Masuyo close and cried the tears she needed to shed.

Miroku stayed with her continually, refusing to leave her side. The child's loss affected him as well, perhaps even more so on some level, for unlike Sango, he had seen their miscarried baby. It's skin so thin that he could see the weaving blood vessels, its other organs deep inside, and its tiny, fragile heart. It wasn't beating, but Miroku had felt as if the child were pulling on his own soul, as if it might spring awake at any moment. It was surreal, unreal, and horrifying. To his shame he woke often at night from feverish, haunting dreams where the child did spring awake in his hand—it had fit just in the palm of one hand. He dreamed that invisible forces held him back as the midwife wrapped the child in rough, bloodstained cloth, smothering it as it sprang to life, breathing and squalling weakly. Always he was too late as he grabbed the precious bundle from her, always the child would have passed on as he unwrapped it, fractions of a second too late.

Sometimes he saw its eyes, violet like his own, or earthy brown like Sango's. Other times the child was Masuyo or Kasai, or Tisoki or Kohimu.

On the very day of their arrival, as Sango fell into sleep, Miroku left her for the nearest temple. Alone, without the need to be strong for Sango, he allowed himself to cry for their lost child at last. He prayed his nightmares would cease. He prayed for peace.

In this way time passed without remark. Rin's presence was nearly forgotten as grief wrapped itself around the household and the two different families it held within it.

After two weeks, which oddly felt like only a few days, Sango recovered, almost abruptly. She refused to speak of her loss openly, and instead she focused on her remaining children and on her husband with a fierce, solitary resolve. In spite of her weakness she joined Kagome in caring for the children and for the household. Miroku hovered behind her every step watchful and concerned.

The demon slayer, Sango as she was named, captivated Rin when she emerged, recovered physically from her loss. Sango and Rin had never met one another recently, not since before Naraku had been slain, but the demon slayer didn't appear surprised by the younger woman's presence. Miroku or Inuyasha had likely told her during her two weeks of exile and mourning. For now she had little interest in Rin, she held her baby son close to her, hugged her sons, and fussed over her only daughter. She had no curiosity left for the stranger inside Inuyasha and Kagome's home.

Until, of course, she heard of the connection they shared, the same painful loss. The priestess Hyakka was the one that let the news slip in one of her visits to both Rin and Sango. Though both women had recovered from their miscarriages—one keeping her baby and the other losing it—the herbal remedies continued. For Sango it was a mixture to strengthen her body after the loss of blood and nutrients, for Rin it was to keep her womb content and still.

After this news, Sango watched Rin while she taught the children, when she sat and learned Kagome's strange "English" language, and when she interacted with Tsukiyume or Shippo or Kagome. Part of her despised Rin for the simplest and basest feelings: jealousy. Rin was still pregnant while Sango had lost her own child. Yet at the same time, Sango caught the younger woman's expressions when she thought no one else was watching, and it was apparent to her that Rin was quietly miserable. Sango pitied her as well as feeling jealous. It hadn't been so long ago that she'd had to contend with Miroku's continual flirting with every woman of childbearing age.

Finally her chance came one morning when Miroku and Inuyasha took the children—Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, and Shippo—for a training excursion. Kagome stayed with Koinu, Akisame, Rin, and Tsukiyume. She was settling in for a lesson in "English" when Akisame threw a tantrum. Kagome, red faced with frustration at her daughter's screaming, excused herself and left for the gardens outside. Koinu, Rin, and Tsukiyume were left with the bizarre, foreign alphabet before them and with Sango sitting nearby, chewing up little bits of food for Masuyo.

Koinu's little white dog ears drooped. "Why doesn't Father take me?" he whimpered. All morning the boy had pouted sourly, wounded that Inuyasha had left him behind while taking all the others with he and Miroku. It was probably his gloomy mood that had set off his younger sister. The pup stared down at his small, nimble fingers, their clever, tight grasp of the pencil in his hand meant nothing to him when he longed to wield something like a sword, something his father would be proud of him for.

Tsukiyume let her own pencil fall flat. Her own clawed hands were clumsy when put beside Koinu's. "I'm sure he'll take you when you're older." She tried to comfort him, but her voice was shaky, uncertain.

Sango watched them keenly as she picked through the little bowl of sliced fruits she'd decided on as using for Masuyo's breakfast. Her son eagerly pawed at the bowl, but deftly, without even looking down at him, Sango moved it out of his reach and continued to chew the fruit into a mushy paste that he would be able to gum and swallow easily.

Koinu turned and actually glared at Tsukiyume, a rare expression for him. His ears flattened warningly. "Kasai is the same age as me!"

"Kasai will be my apprentice." Sango murmured when she'd spat the paste into her hand and lowered it to Masuyo's level, tempting him. "Kohimu and Tisoki started at the same age, Koinu."

"But she's learning to fight _before me!"_ Koinu's eyes swelled with tears, though the youngster pawed at them irritably.

"Anyone could teach you to fight…" Tsukiyume murmured, trying to placate him, but only succeeding in angering him as he interpreted her words as an insult rather than as an offer to help.

Rin at last spoke up, though her voice was quiet, barely audible. "Inuyasha is waiting for your demonic powers to mature and strengthen."

Koinu faced her with bafflement, dumbstruck at this new possibility. His little ears quivered, his eyes were alight, but his expression clouded and formed into a frown as he stared at her. "How do you know?"

Throughout the exchange Rin remained focused on the pencil grasped between her fingers. Like Tsukiyume she found it odd, but she enjoyed the difficulty and newness of the lessons and the odd language. She enjoyed it all the more because it distracted her from thoughts of Sesshomaru. She pressed the pencil tip to the lined paper again, trying to wrap her brain deeply around the curves and waves of the letters.

"Youkai children are trained very slowly." She closed her eyes, recalling the lessons she'd had on youkai, their biology, their beliefs, their traditions, their clans…

"You're right." Sango agreed with her sharply, startling Rin into lifting her gaze and meeting the demon slayer's stare. "Shippo's powers have only just started to appear. Koinu, your father may have taken Kasai with him today, but she won't be able to use Tetsusaiga."

Koinu's face brightened, his ears perked up eagerly. "Really?" he looked between Sango and Rin, "How long do I have to wait?"

Sango smiled gently, scooping Masuyo into one arm and snatching up the tiny bowl of fruit in the other. She scooted closer to the table, settling near Rin, who stiffened at the unexpected closeness by the demon slayer. "Why don't you go find your mother and ask her, Koinu? She might know something."

Koinu nodded and backed away from the table hurrying out toward the kitchen and the sliding door that lead out into the garden where Kagome was letting Akisame blow off some steam.

As soon as Koinu had gone, Sango focused her attention on Rin. The younger woman's body was beginning to round with pregnancy more noticeably, her robes were borrowed from Kagome and therefore too long for her. Her hair had been cut in a courtly style, though it wasn't pinned on her head in the proper manner. Sango took all of this in and then bowed slightly. "Lady Rin…?"

Rin fought the instinctual frown that tried to cover her face. "You don't have to call me that."

Tsukiyume watched their exchange with wide, curious orange eyes.

"You were Lord Sesshomaru's ward as a child." Sango narrowed her eyes at Rin carefully, dredging through her memory. Masuyo, unnoticed, fished his fingers into the bowl of sliced fruit and pulled one out clumsily, rubbing it over his face messily. "I remember you." Sango's expression loosened, her eyes and mouth opened with shock. "Kohaku tried to kill you."

Rin shook her head slowly, staring resolutely down at the lined paper in front of her, but the pencil shook in her fingers awkwardly. "I don't know what you're…"

"He was my little brother." Sango explained, turning her gaze to the ceiling. Rin noticed the shine of tears in the corners of the demon slayer's eyes, pooling in her tear ducts, catching in her lashes. "Naraku…possessed him." there was no other word she could think of to describe Kohaku's enslavement underneath the evil demon.

"I'm sorry for your loss." Rin frowned, feeling trapped and helpless. Naraku was a creature she scarcely remembered. Her childhood memories were dominated by Sesshomaru after the tragic death of her parents and brothers. He had replaced everything else in her life. Dimly she could recall a boy from her past, a human boy in the guise of a demon slayer's sleek body armor. But as she saw Sango's reaction, Rin cringed, realizing her apology would also remind the demon slayer of her recent miscarriage. "I'm sorry…" she blundered again, but Sango waved one hand dismissively, silencing her.

"Forgive me." Sango bowed a little and, at last seeing Masuyo's pillaged fruit, she tore the thing from her little son's hands. "One of the priestesses told me that when you first arrived here you were ill." Sango eyed Rin with a mixture of emotions, impossible to read in their complexity. "I am glad to see you recovered."

Tsukiyume's ears flattened, she bit her lip. "Lady Sango," she interrupted meekly, but her words trailed off weakly, she had nothing else to say to distract the demon slayer with.

Sango and Rin all but ignored her anyway, they had become tangled in their own game, sizing one another up, making their first real impressions.

Stiffly, Rin bowed. "I thank you for your concern, Lady Sango." She addressed the demon slayer formally but coldly, "But I have not always been so fortunate."

This stopped Sango, making her blink and her lips, already parted for whatever her next words were; pinch in on themselves for a moment. The small wrinkles around her eyes loosened, relaxing. She searched Rin's face carefully before she spoke again. "I'm sorry…" her tone indicated subtlety that she didn't understand. It was a request for more information.

Rin gave it to her, trembling with bitterness. "I have lost more children than you have birthed."

Sango withdrew slightly, flinching. She appeared about to respond, but her words were lost as the front door slid open with a loud clattering noise. Heavy footsteps made the three young women turn their heads blinkingly to regard the newcomers—Inuyasha and Miroku had returned. Koinu followed his father proudly now, with newfound confidence, his tears already forgotten and buried.

If only other pains could be discarded so easily.

Sango pulled Masuyo close to her and bowed slightly to Rin. "Lady…" it was the first time Sango had afforded Rin a title and _meant_ it. She left the sitting table as Koinu found his seat again, happily perched between Rin and Tsukiyume, ready to continue his lesson.

Rin tried to focus on the table, on the pencil in her short, narrow fingers, but her eyes darted toward where Sango and Miroku were meeting again, embracing lovingly, albeit awkwardly around Masuyo. She felt both a connection to the slayer and a deep, burning jealousy. Sango had been blessed with many of the things Rin was denied. A husband that was loyal and a good father, as well as a brood of healthy, intelligent children to dote on. She empathized with Sango for her miscarriage, while at once the jealousy made her wary and self-conscious.

"Are you all right?" Tsukiyume asked her, cautiously, leaning over Koinu as she spoke.

Rin nodded without looking at the hanyou girl. "I'm fine." But her face was hard, her hands shaking.

* * *

Fumou was found within days of the edict that was issued—signed by Sesshomaru—against him. Daken sent him with his messenger, Oushi, to Sesshomaru at the Insen. The monkey spent the journey encased in a closed, horse-drawn cart. He was not told where he was going or who would greet him when he arrived. He accepted his fate with more dignity than Daken or Oushi would've guessed was possible. He was shackled, hands and feet, as well as tied to the cart by youkai magic.

The monkey youkai was short, squat, and blue-skinned. His fur was thick, richly white. When he smiled with nervousness—for the little youkai seemed to like to smile as much as Daken liked to smirk—his canine teeth were long and pointed, although very narrow, almost needle-like. His grin was disconcerting to the inuyoukai, as were his eyes: they were pure black, like bits of charcoal imbedded against his white fur, like a snowman's eyes.

The journey to Insen didn't take very long and Fumou arrived without incident, Oushi guarding him. The prisoner was received in a small room where the shutters had been shut and no lamps burned. It was utterly dark, a bad thing for the monkey youkai. For the first time Fumou was nervous. He couldn't see in the dim light, his eyes were as poor as a human's in the dark. The inuyoukai, meanwhile, could observe him shaking and sweating with growing terror whether it was dark or not. His fear-stink made them scowl disgustedly.

When Sesshomaru at last entered the room, Oushi was startled by the lord's appearance. He was dressed loosely, wearing a simple white robe without any armor adornments. Even his sword was missing; there was nothing around his waist, only the sash to keep his kimono closed. He was waif-like, graceful as always, but thinner. As he sat, announced by a small, round bald servant, Oushi caught the hollows beneath Sesshomaru's eyes as well as the new sharpness in the lines of his face.

"Fumou." Sesshomaru muttered the monkey's name coldly.

The little youkai tensed, shivering as if it were cold in the room, but in actuality it was blazing hot. Without the shutters and windows open the little room had overheated with Oushi, the monkey, and the five or so guards lining the walls. Sesshomaru, however, looked cool and unruffled by the sticky heat or the stink of perspiration.

"Y-yes?" the monkey replied, shaking.

"Do you know why you have been taken into custody?"

Fumou doubled over, clever, nimble hands clutching at his stomach as if in pain. "I…I made a m-mistake."

Sesshomaru was silent, waiting, calculating.

Fumour went on, stuttering. "I was asked t-to…" he stopped, beginning to hyperventilate. When the silence dragged on beyond a minute, Oushi nudged the monkey with his foot, prodding him to continue. Fumou finished, blurting out, "I poisoned the lady of the house!"

His confession was greeted with silence. The monkey searched the darkness, eyes dilated wide with shock. It was probably the best he'd seen in the dark in all of this lifetime. He could make out the whiteness of the lord seated before him, but the guards dressed in dark beyond were merely shadows. Sesshomaru's face was a blur of different shaded shadows, unclear. It was impossible to read his expression.

"It was n-not my d-doing!" he gasped, beginning to rock back and forth. The shackles around his wrists and ankles jangled as he moved. "I w-was a-asked…"

"By whom?" Sesshomaru asked. His voice, surprisingly, was almost gentle.

Fumou stopped moving, taken aback. He squinted hopelessly at the white figure before him. "Samurai lords…" he was beginning to realize he was being interrogated, cooperation might ensure his survival, or at least a lessening of his punishment.

Oushi grunted and prodded Fumou with his foot again. "What lords?"

"There were three of them!" Fumou licked his lips, speaking fast. "The pay, it was…" he shook his head, "I couldn't turn it away!" he fell forward, crying and begging for mercy pathetically.

"Which lords, what clans?" Oushi repeated, seeing a slight nod from Sesshomaru, his only signal.

"The Okorinbou!" Fumou whimpered, blubbering. "They brought a kitsune to supply the herbs…"

"Kaiban." Sesshomaru murmured the kitsune's name and Fumou looked up, eyes wide and shining.

"Yes, that was his name…"

There was a commotion from the door that Sesshomaru had entered the room from. A man dressed in black armor entered, carrying a sack. He did not sit and did not speak, but all eyes landed on him immediately—with the exception, of course, of Sesshomaru, who stared straight ahead at Fumou instead. The man in black reached into the sack and pulled out something. It was round, the size roughly of a bowling ball, but heavier, though Fumou didn't know that. The man hefted the strange round shape, tossing it at Fumou.

The monkey cringed, crying out and lifting his arms to shield his face from what he assumed was a weapon…but the thing bounced, harmless although heavy, away from his hands. It sprayed a sticky, cold liquid onto Fumou's face, hands, and chest. The monkey's eyes told him it was a dark substance, his nose told him it was blood—kitsune blood. Sesshomaru had had the kitsune Kaiban's head tossed at Fumou.

He began to sob, rocking back and forth and pleading for forgiveness.

"Which lords?" Sesshomaru asked this now, again with the nearly gentle tone.

"Please don't kill me!" Fumou begged piteously.

"Their names." Sesshomaru ordered, this time a little more tersely.

Fumou blubbered incoherently, too sick with fear of his own death to be of any use. A long pause came and went as the monkey mewled and cried helplessly, then, at last, Sesshomaru rose to his feet.

"For your crimes you will be punished." He murmured, quiet and cold, and then, fractions of a second later, he exacted that punishment. Lunging forward, Sesshomaru was a white streak as he crossed the little room to Fumou and slashed with his lightly green-glowing fingers, severing the monkey youkai's head in a single blow. The pathetic cries and pleading were silenced, replaced by the hiss of blood as it gurgled and pulsed out of Fumou's body and drained from his severed head.

Sesshomaru flicked blood from his claws nonchalantly. "Dispose of his body." Now, for the first time, Oushi could pick out anger inside the lord's voice.

He bowed low. "Yes Lord Sesshomaru."

"Have the head stored."

Oushi nodded, already cringing at the stink of blood and death in the room, but he had to ask, "Both heads, my lord?"

Sesshomaru was already turning to leave the room. "Yes, both heads." And then he was gone.

* * *

A/N: Done! 


	22. The Okorinbou

A/N: I'm coming to you from California now! Yippee! Well this was at least partially written there…

This chapter begins slowly, or so it seems to anyway. It finishes darkly, but also beautifully I think, with Sesshomaru. I must WARN you all though, there is violence, blood, all that fun stuff. Merciless killing.

Disclaimer: No, I do not own them.

* * *

Last Chapter: Sesshomaru found the chef responsible for poisoning Rin, the monkey youkai Fumou. He had Fumou executed and discovered that the guys footing the bill were the Okorinbou, samurai lords. Rin found a purpose in IY and Kagome's household, as a teacher and as a pupil herself. She also spoke to Sango, tensely. Both women remain wary and jealous of the other, Sango for the fact that Rin hasn't lost her baby, and Rin because Sango has Miroku and her children. Also, Shimofuri and Sasugainu met and spoke.

* * *

**The Okorinbou**

The Okorinbou were a small clan, but good fortune, and an excellent plot of land on which they could farm with unusually bountiful results, had made them rich. They lived in the southern tips of Sesshomaru's territory. They were fine tax payers and their representatives and the samurai lords themselves always appeared cordial to Sesshomaru if they met with him in his court.

But Sesshomaru wasn't perturbed or even surprised by the thought that they had betrayed him on such a deeply personal level. There was one small, dark detail marring his relationship with that particular clan.

A few years previously, when Sesshomaru had reluctantly decided to marry Rin off to one of the lords within his lands, the Okorinbou had gladly been among the candidates. They brought a rich dowry just to see Sesshomaru, to impress him, as if he were the girl's father and they might potentially buy her through him. Their dowry, their wealth, and their eagerness, had put them high on Sesshomaru's list of candidates. They had everything going for them, it was a good match.

There'd been only one problem: emotionally, Sesshomaru felt _no_ _one_ was good enough for Rin. The Okorinbou were recommended and praised by Jaken and all of Sesshomaru's human retainers. Logically it made perfect sense, they'd done everything right, but Sesshomaru put them off, accepting their offerings, but never committing to anything.

The Okorinbou laid down a great amount of money and gifts in good faith, assuming that Rin was as good as bought, as good as their own. They were wrong. They received nothing and they certainly felt that Sesshomaru cheated them out of their dowries and gifts, and out of the mysterious, beautiful Lady Rin.

It made perfect sense in Sesshomaru's mind that the Okorinbou would be responsible for Rin's suffering, for each child she'd lost in blood.

And yet, without a name for a specific individual, Sesshomaru was lost when it came to vengeance. The Okorinbou were powerful human allies, valuable for their people, their taxes, their crops, and their land. Destroying the entire clan would be a waste, and yet Sesshomaru found himself greatly tempted at the idea.

In any other situation, Sesshomaru might restrain himself, might feel that the Okorinbou benefited him more alive than dead, but not now. Now they had betrayed him on a deeply personal level, affronting him in a way that he could never forgive and never let go, no matter how powerful or valuable the men were.

So it was that, only hours after Fumou's confession and death, Sesshomaru had amassed his youkai armies and moved them toward the little slot of the Okorinbou's family land. They didn't attack, but remained ready and waiting in the hills and forests, waiting for some signal that an attack was to begin, or if they were to disband. Effective civil war had been unheard of for several human generations within the Western Lands, but the youkai could've cared less about that. Some of them were old enough that the days of war and bloodshed were clearly in their memories, and even ingrained in their skins and hides.

Meanwhile, as the youkai army waited, Sesshomaru met with the Okorinbou lords unexpectedly, calling on them when he dropped into their home palace. The Okorinbou's palace was well guarded—by human warriors—and it was fortified, but it was still just a palace, not a castle. It would be easily burned down, easily attacked. Sesshomaru's arrival, unannounced, would doubtlessly trouble the Okorinbou. Their palace was exposed and they knew it. Normally they met with Sesshomaru in one of his own castles, with many other human delegates. Sesshomaru would leave them in peace on their own lands, in their own palace and croplands, or so they had always believed.

Their assumption of that was obvious. As Sesshomaru approached the gates of the castle, he could already smell the stink of perfumes from the Okorinbou women. The lords were so secure, so complacent, that they were staying with their women, in the same unprotected palace.

The stoic lord of the Western Lands passed through the gates, with flustered human guards on either side. They escorted him stiffly to a pathetically small audience room. Well-lit and carefully decorated, bamboo sprawled over the _fusuma_ screens, a blue-black stream of ink curled over one whole wall, plum blossoms dipped into the water eloquently. Among the exquisite screens and their artwork, Sesshomaru fit right in, a fine pale glowing jewel inside the beautiful palace audience room. Only the tiny downward twist of Sesshomaru's mouth gave away his dark mood, the upcoming bloodshed, vengeance, and carnage. Only Rin could've caught the micro frown, only Rin could've anticipated what was to come.

As he'd known they would, almost all of the important Okorinbou men showed up. They filtered into the room hurriedly. Each man walked differently, some stiff like the guards, others shaking and loose, others clumsy with nervousness. A few were bold enough, or merely overwhelmed by curiosity, that they found the nerve to stare at Sesshomaru as they slipped in to the little audience room. The lord of the Western Lands took them in silently, like the crocodile stalking its prey, readying itself for the strike.

These men were drawn by curiosity, and apprehension. Their palms were sweaty, their mouths either too dry or too wet, their guts seized up with tension. Though all of them worked to hide it, Sesshomaru's senses were far above their own. He didn't need to look into their faces, or even to read their body postures. Their scents alone revealed their fear and anxiety. Their scents fueled his growing disgust and hatred.

Where none of the Okorinbou could see it, carefully tucked away in the depths of his long, flowing sleeve, Sesshomaru's single fist closed into a fist reflexively.

The leader of the Okorinbou clan was named Inchou. He settled himself at the center of the audience room, facing Sesshomaru but remaining as far away from him as possible, which amounted to less than ten feet. The Okorinbou were sitting closely together behind him—seven men of various ages lined up before the inuyoukai that reigned over them. The audience room wasn't built to accommodate such a strange meeting, and with it so heavily one-sided. A few of the older and younger men wore cynical smiles or sneers as they sensed the bizarre turn of events before them. Perhaps they even sensed their doom.

Inchou Okorinbou was middle-aged, with tiny, narrow eyes that were steely black, like flecks of obsidian. His face was otherwise unmemorable and he wasn't a handsome man, but his eyes stood out in his face, revealing his sharp, knife-like intelligence. He initiated the meeting formally by bowing. The Okorinbou men behind him followed suit, each bowing until their foreheads touched the matting. Even the oldest man among them, though he scowled with the pain of arthritis, managed the bow.

Sesshomaru watched their display of respect, unmoved and silent.

Inchou spoke while he was still in his bow. "Lord Sesshomaru, my clansman and I welcome you on this unexpected visit." When he sat up, his robes rustling, the other men rose as well. "May I inquire as to what has brought Lord Sesshomaru to us on this day?"

The seven lords of the Okorinbou had a moment of silence during which they were able to notice properly that Sesshomaru was sitting with them in his armor and wearing a sword. A few of the Okorinbou had also entered the room with their swords, but all of them knew they stood little chance if Sesshomaru had come to pick a fight.

One of the youngest men caught Sesshomaru's eye. It was a youth that Sesshomaru had seen years ago at the Nejiro castle, when the Okorinbou had come with their dowries, asking that Rin be given to them. The young samurai was an upcoming heir within the clan; he was the one that would've married Rin if Sesshomaru had given her to the Okorinbou. Sesshomaru scrutinized the boy for a time, seeing his narrow frame, the limp black hair tied up in his topknot, the acne scars on his chin and forehead.

It wasn't the boy's appearance or even the fact that Sesshomaru remembered him as Rin's would-be fiancé, instead what drew his interest was the fact that the boy was shaking and staring at the floor intently. There was sweat beading on his brow, the sharp, rank odor rose strongly above the other men's smells.

Sesshomaru's face rippled briefly, once. The lords caught this only faintly, though all of them were pretending not to stare at Sesshomaru, but none of them were able to interpret the look before it had vanished again. And then they had Sesshomaru's words to distract them.

"I am drawn by curiosity." Sesshomaru told them, seemingly calm. The lords' shoulders drooped as several of them released silent, but thoroughly relieved sighs. "There is a mystery I must solve."

Inchou inclined his head, "If we may be of any service to Lord Sesshomaru at all in this mystery he must not hesitate to share it with us."

Wordlessly, and without taking his golden, hawk-like stare away from the Okorinbou lords, Sesshomaru reached into his robes with his single hand, producing a small, coarse cloth sack. He placed the sack in front of his left knee and then reached a second time into his robe to pull out another sack, identical to the first. This he placed at his right knee.

The Okorinbou blinked confusedly and leaned forward, studying the two bags unabashedly. The cloth was ugly and coarse, not worth wearing unless it was for a peasant working out in the fields. Both sacks had something inside, rounded and small. No one spoke for a time, until at last Inchou gathered his courage. "Lord Sesshomaru?"

"I have two pieces of the puzzle." Sesshomaru murmured, "I need three more." Now he stared at the boy, seeing his shoulders shaking violently. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Boy."

The youth lifted his eyes abruptly and tried to still his shaking. He was very young, probably not much beyond his very early twenties. A few of the lords sitting around him were shifting uncomfortably; a few of them had their hands resting a little too close to their swords.

With the boy's attention, Sesshomaru reached for the bag at his left first, shaking the sack until the contents fell to the audience floor. Sesshomaru tossed the first bag aside and reached then for the second one, doing the same. When the second sack was removed, there were two desiccated, mutilated heads at Sesshomaru's knees. The lords gasped and half-rose from their sitting positions, alarmed. The boy, meanwhile, had hunched over and made a small noise in his throat, as if about to vomit.

Inchou made a hissing noise in his throat. "Sit!" he ordered the men around him, and then, to Sesshomaru, "My lord, what is the meaning of this?"

"Three of you have betrayed me." He answered, and for the first time emotion was visible in his eyes even to someone as emotionally dense as Inuyasha. It was a rage without hesitation, without mercy, and without passion. It was cold rage, borne of the need to rectify the wrongs committed against Rin. "I have come to punish you."

Inchou's beady eyes grew several times over in size. "Lord Sesshomaru—the Okorinbou have not betrayed you! The actions of the few must not be held over the many…" he bowed, and in spite of the rank stink of fear that Sesshomaru could smell rising from him, Inchou didn't shake or quail before the inuyoukai.

The other lords began to rise to their feet, trying to flee. One of them was the boy.

Sesshomaru was on his feet and across the small room faster than any human eye could follow. He caught the boy and knocked the other lords that were trying to make their getaways aside, back into the audience room. The boy screamed, high and shrilly. The acrid stink of urine entered the room, adding to the reek of sweat and fear.

"_Please! It was never my idea!"_ the boy cried unconsciously, the tears streaming over his cheeks.

Sesshomaru ignored him, coldly. The edges of his irises were tinged red. He held the boy by the arm, hard enough that the boy cried from more than just fear, but pain as well. Sesshomaru lifted the boy smoothly, ignoring the shouting around him and the bustle of guards, the clanking of armor, and stared up at him with an open, snarling maw.

"_For her suffering you will all die."_

The boy drew a helpless, hopeless breath to plead and cry again, but Sesshomaru let go of him and slashed in the same motion, severing the boy's head. His body stood for a moment upright, spurting blood at the neck. The lords nearest backpedaled, gasping and gagging as their faces and bodies were spattered with blood. The boy's head rolled a few feet with the force of Sesshomaru's killing blow, leaving a trail of blood in its wake.

As the body fell to the floor wetly, the lords began to show their true colors in their final moments. Two other men, one middle-aged, the other bent and old, rushed forward as if to help the boy, and Sesshomaru noted their shared features—direct family. It was only justice; part of him thought dimly, that the boy's death brought pain to his family. After all, the boy had killed Rin's babies, turnabout was only fair play.

A man in his fifties hurtled for the door, stinking of urine with his panic. Sesshomaru let his whip fly, cutting the man down first with pain, then killing him with the poison. Inchou and another man had moved to the other side of the room, joining with the armor-clad guards and drawing their feeble human swords. They shouted to the two men that were half-grieving over the boy's beheaded body, and to one man that seemed dazed, staring stupidly at Sesshomaru's carnage.

Sesshomaru brought the dazed man down with his whip—three down and four to go.

The boy's father scuttled across the room to join Inchou, the other lord, and the guards. The old man, who Sesshomaru had identified as the boy's grandfather, refused to move from his grandson's lifeless, still bleeding corpse. He was shaking his head and muttering a name. "Hisou…Hisou…"

A knife flew from one of the guards. Sesshomaru reached out, effortlessly, and caught the projectile. The guard that had thrown it sneered and bared his teeth in concentration and rage. Sesshomaru clutched the knife briefly, and then, with hardly a single glance at the guards, the boy's father, and Inchou, he threw the little blade across the room. It smacked into the head of its target, the last Okorinbou lord that had moved to fight immediately. He fell to the floor, dead at once.

The old man mourning the boy's body glared at Sesshomaru from the floor and spoke with shaking lips. "Monster!"

Sesshomaru at last unsheathed his sword, raising it as he glanced between the old man and the line of guards and the last of the Okorinbou lords. He gathered energy from the massive well of energy stored deep in his core. It chilled the room like a wind from over a glacier, and tore over Sesshomaru's robes and his hair, lifting and tearing at both. His mouth was open in a silent, vicious snarl, filled to the brim with his sharp white teeth.

The Okorinbou lords saw a rising white light, a brief flash of movement as Sesshomaru made a slashing motion with his sword, and then the light closed in all around them. Pain, overwhelming and intense as their bodies, armor and swords and all, were torn to bits. And then it was over and they were dead, unfeeling and freed.

The audience room burst into flame. The ink on the _fusuma_ walls caught in the flame, burning and curling in on itself, blackening, all of its fine, delicate beauty lost forever. The fire took hold quickly, spreading high into the castle, and lighting the darkening sky.

Hidden in the distance, the youkai army spotted the fire and rallied itself, charging into battle. The women and children, and even the servants, maids, cooks, and guards that stumbled out of the burning Okorinbou castle were cut down mercilessly.

Sesshomaru retreated from the carnage, though he did wait within sight distance, watching the palace burn dispassionately. The orange-yellow glow of the flames lit his eyes, mimicking the rich amber color of his irises, but if Rin or Jaken had been present, they would've shuddered and averted their gaze. Rarely used frown lines were present as the great, stoic inuyoukai stared at the destruction, the _triumph_ of his revenge…

His lips, his chin quivered. The frown stayed in place. The victory was hollow and worthless. He had righted the wrongs, but it hadn't brought Rin back, and it left a sour, sickening taste in his mouth. The old man's voice came back to him, the lips quivering with grief: _"Monster!"_

He slaughtered in Rin's name, to avenge her suffering, her loss. Somehow it did nothing to assuage his own. The ache remained where he never dared touch it. The memory of Rin's pain as each child was lost, and his own as with each loss he became more and more jaded.

Had life between them become only about loss? Had they lost hope? There was a spark in every life. Sesshomaru had seen it many times as he snuffed out his enemies and exacted his cold, useless revenge. Perhaps that spark was like hope, and maybe it was that hope that fueled new life—and he and Rin had lost it. Perhaps poison was only partly to blame…Even now the revenge was about death and the loss of life. They had lost their unborn babies, and then they'd lost each other. Was it the only thing that he knew how to do anymore?

Sesshomaru turned from the blaze of the burning castle and disappeared into the darkness of the forested hillsides, like a wraith, like a shadow.

* * *

Word spread swiftly. By the next afternoon the news of the Okorinbou's slaughter and the massing of Sesshomaru's armies had reached Shimofuri in the Middle Lands. The twisted love story that was circulating—that to further his own position, Shimofuri had stolen the helpless Rin away from Sesshomaru, who was now desperate to reclaim his lost lover—didn't favor Shimofuri. The people in the Middle Lands were suffering and unhappy. They didn't want a war over some strange mortal girl that had gotten caught up in youkai affairs. They wanted peace and prosperity, they wanted to live.

Shimofuri, in spite of himself, felt much the same way. Cruelty was not part of his nature. Part of him regretted exposing Sesshomaru and tangling with the lord of the Western Lands at all—it had gained him nothing. Tsukiyume was lost again, out with Rin. Giving Rin up to Sesshomaru would be to lose his only power, his only bargaining tool. His uncle had turned on him. Sesshomaru would be frothing at the mouth with his eagerness to kill Shimofuri.

Shimofuri was unmated and unwed; he had no heirs, no close kin aside from Sasugainu and Tsukiyume. He had everything to lose to Sesshomaru.

The only power he had at all was Rin, but Sesshomaru would find her sooner or later, and then it would be finished…

In the meantime, while he was searching, Sesshomaru could kill Shimofuri, trusting that he would find Rin later by his own means anyway. There were no choices as far as Shimofuri could see. He would send out a summons to Sesshomaru and propose an equal exchange, terms for surrender, anything as long as he could keep his lands and his life.

As Shimofuri sent his messengers out, the loyal kitsune clan that served him, he fought a churning sensation inside his stomach. It was probably indigestion, but Shimofuri counted it as a loss of hope, as dishonor.

One of the messengers, a kitsune called Jinsoku, he ordered to find Rin at Inuyasha's estate, to discover Rin's health, and to tell her that Shimofuri would no longer hide her from Sesshomaru…

* * *

"You aren't going anywhere, dammit!" Inuyasha shouted, arms folding over his chest in his most infamous stubborn and pouting position.

"Inuyasha," Kagome hissed back at him, rolling her eyes tiredly, "We need a few things," she kept her voice low, but her tone was one of warning, "Please don't do this…"

The hanyou huffed exasperatedly, "Do what?" unlike Kagome he made no attempt to quiet his voice. It could be heard at every point of the house easily.

"Throw your usual tantrum. I swear you're as bad as Akisame!" she started to walk out of the kitchen, making her way steadily toward the door where her shoes—not the sandals she wore when working and living comfortably with her family in the Feudal era, but rather the brown, closed toe sneakers she'd brought with her for heavy walking—were waiting for her.

Inuyasha slipped around her, using his youkai speed to cut her path off. "Every time you leave Akisame bawls and I want to…" his hands shook in front of him, claws looking sharp and vicious, as if he were about to confess to wanting to kill his own daughter, but what came out of his mouth was, "…rip my fucking ears out!"

"I know you hate being the babysitter, Inuyasha." Kagome sighed and reached out to him, touching his cheek. For a moment the hanyou's expression was hard, as if he might throw off her touch, but then his posture softened and he half closed his eyes, relishing her tiny display of affection. His ears drooped pathetically, reminding Kagome of Koinu's when the pup was too tired and in desperate need of a nap. "You do an excellent job though, you know?"

She stared at him with bright, cheery eyes, half smiling, and Inuyasha scoffed; somehow managing even to blush at her words a little. "Feh."

"I won't be gone very long." She lifted her touch up to his drooping ear and stroked the fine downy fuzz there. Inuyasha stiffened, eyes snapping open and inhaling sharply once. He leaned into her touch and Kagome allowed the gentle motion of her fingers grow firmer, more confident. The change made Inuyasha close his eyes and groan.

"Kagome…" he murmured thickly, leaning forward, his tantrum was completely forgotten. He wrapped his arms around her waist loosely and nuzzled her lips.

With all of the people in their house, and Koinu and Akisame sleeping in their room, in their bed now, Inuyasha and Kagome had been afforded little intimacy. Tension had built up under the seams, and Kagome's touch had acted like a spark to a tank of gasoline.

She returned his grasp, sighing as Inuyasha tickled the sensitive skin of her neck with his lips, then proceeded to attack her ear. Her legs wobbled, as if they were made of wax and Inuyasha's advances had turned the heat up enough to melt them. Inuyasha's hold on her offered support and she took it, sinking deeper into his warm embrace.

A shrill, insistent crying started from the other side of the house. Inuyasha's ears pricked as he unconsciously took in the sound and analyzed the cry as not belonging to one of his own offspring. Kagome, though her ears were mostly immobile and therefore not as easily readable, did the same and arrived at the same conclusion. But the sound was enough to tone down their growing desire, to force them to return to the world of speech.

Inuyasha had yet to remove his lips from near her ear. "It's not Aki."

She nodded, "I know. I have to go, Inuyasha."

He growled, tightening his hold. "Dammit Kagome…"

The couple had missed the faint swish of robes as someone approached, but they couldn't miss the way Miroku stumbled into the kitchen clumsily. He stared at them for a moment after entering, his face twisting with confusion, and then moved on as if to ignore them. It was very early in the morning—a time that Miroku and Sango tended to sleep through while they stayed with their friends, as if they were on a vacation of sorts. Inuyasha and Kagome, meanwhile, kept early hours—not always because they wanted to, but rather because hanyou didn't need as much sleep as humans. As a result Kagome was surrounded with early risers, and when in Rome one must do as the Romans do.

Inuyasha watched the sleepy monk with a mixture of annoyance and what might've bordered on concern. "What do you want, Miroku?" he growled.

"Food, sake." He answered blearily.

From out in the sitting room the baby cries had reached a sort of fever pitch. Inuyasha heard Sango's tread over the hard wooden floors and the pattering of her other children following her. From behind him Kagome stirred, but although Inuyasha turned one ear toward her, he missed the quiet grating of the front door as Kagome slid it open and slipped out onto the verandah to put on her shoes.

"Sake?" he demanded, "What the hell do you…" he frowned, distracted and irritated as Miroku pulled at the cubbies and cupboards in the kitchen, rifling sloppily through Kagome's stored food, pots, cups, chopsticks, spices, and, of course, the various packets of Instant Ramen. "Kagome doesn't keep sake."

Miroku's hands stilled and he turned back to face Inuyasha, blinking incredulously, appearing awake for the first time. "She doesn't?"

"No," he turned to seek Kagome's opinion directly, and growled when he realized she'd slipped away. Cursing under his breath, Inuyasha hurried outside after her, but as he followed her scent and rounded the house, he knew it was too late. Kagome had retrieved Roba, the mare that Rin had brought with her, and was walking her toward the front gates. She smiled knowingly as she caught sight of Inuyasha glaring at her. With Roba so close, and Kagome clearly planning to take the horse to the village before she left for her era via the well, Inuyasha couldn't try to physically stop her without spooking the flighty mare.

"I'm sorry Inuyasha." She called, but her smile didn't suggest that her words were all that true.

Growling, but accepting his fate, Inuyasha followed her at a distance, arms crossed, face set in a scowl. He watched over Kagome, even opening the gate for her, as she mounted Roba and set out down the path toward the village. The mare was growing slowly accustom to the youkai scents around her. She barely cast Inuyasha even a glance as she trotted down the road.

It wasn't a long trip, but the hanyou was never inclined to leave Kagome alone for long. He trailed Kagome and Roba a ways, taking in the day. High summer was beginning at last. A hot, humid wind pushed at his hair, tugged at his clothing. That same wind was pulling a swathe of swirling white clouds in their direction from the distant sea and the coast. Insects hummed and buzzed in the air, in the shadows cast by the trees alongside the road they amassed, swarming. A long-winged grayish bird sailed through the sky, keening in a low, sharp voice.

A scent on the wind caught Inuyasha's attention. He halted, ears perked, and turned into the breeze, sniffing. With one last look toward Kagome and the mare, Inuyasha leapt off the path and into the brush, following the scent that the wind had given him. In the newly arrived heat, the hanyou broke a sweat before he crashed through the forest foliage and stumbled onto the source of the strange scent.

It was a kitsune, as his nose had already told him. It was in a fox-like form, but it was larger than a true, wild fox. Its belly was cream, its back, tail, and head dark gray. It's fur stood on end when it saw him, it bared brilliantly white teeth.

"You're trespassing." Inuyasha warned the kitsune, curtly. In actuality this wasn't Inuyasha's land just yet—but the hanyou considered this preemptive. It was more constructive to fight the danger before it _became_ one and threatened his family, friends, and his land.

The kitsune's eyes were bright yellow. They flashed now as the creature narrowed its eyes, taking in Inuyasha's appearance, his stance, his scent, his aura. Its fur flattened, its posture relaxed. "You are the hanyou Inuyasha."

Inuyasha's ears flattened immediately. Something in the fox's tone, in its body language, in its choice of words, warned Inuyasha that although the fox was likely harmless, its appearance heralded other things that probably weren't. "What do you want?"

"I am Jinsoku, Lord Shimofuri has sent me." the fox dipped its head, "I have come seeking Lady Rin."

In spite of himself, Inuyasha felt his body tighten as a jolt of alarm passed through him. His immediate decision was to lie—not for Rin, but for Koinu, Akisame, Kagome, Sango, Miroku, Masuyo, Kasai, Kohimu, Tisoki and Shippo—to head off the fox at once. "You got the wrong place, fox. I've never heard of this bimbo."

The fox cocked its head; a twinkle of mischief lit its eyes. "Lord Shimofuri sent me, not Sesshomaru. I am already well aware that she is here."

"And I'm telling you I ain't ever heard of any Rin, or Rim or whatever." He fought the heat that tried to rise in his cheeks by turning his back on the fox and scoffing. "Feh. Get off my land or you'll be sorry." He cracked his knuckles for emphasis, and then crossed his arms over his chest, listening and waiting.

There was a single noise—a short sniffing sound from the kitsune—and then the rustle of leaves and underbrush. Inuyasha jerked his head around and cursed when he saw that the fox had called his bluff and dashed off, completely ignoring him and his warning. Growling with outrage, Inuyasha rushed after the kitsune, only to fall flat on his face as something—a root?—caught his foot. He stumbled, snarling, and reached back to free himself, but found that what had tripped him wasn't a root and wasn't in fact anything natural at all. It was a small carved stone, gray and in the shape of a fox.

Kistune magic. Chances were that every step Inuyasha took in pursuit of the fox would end with him tripping over one of the carved stones, magically appearing there as he walked forward.

"Dammit!"

* * *

It was only natural that Shippo would smell it first. The kit was awake and half-babysitting, half-entertaining Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, and Koinu. Sango and Miroku were preoccupied with their youngest son, Masuyo, who was screaming with the latest teething pains. The sound had driven Shippo outside, into the mugginess of the early morning.

The gardens were simple but pretty, a few bushes and trees, a winding path beneath the trees that would provide shade to passersby in the afternoon. In the morning sun, however, the shadows missed the path, leaving it exposed and sunny. The stones underneath the children's feet were noticeably warmed from the sunlight.

The game this morning was tag, with Shippo being _it_. Of course Shippo, in a real competition, could've caught any of the others, Koinu included, without any real effort. As he'd grown, one of his emerging powers had established itself as a kind of site-to-site teleportation. The kit could be at one place across the garden, climbing on a cherry tree, and then in the space of an eye blink, he could be on the porch, blocking someone's path or tripping Inuyasha—a favorite pastime. While playing tag, however, Shippo restrained himself, giving the others a fair chance.

Like a dog herding sheep, Shippo chased Kohimu, Tisoki, and Kasai until the siblings split up, then he followed Kohimu and Tisoki, letting Kasai go free. He loped after them on two legs as well as all-fours, depending on how much speed he wanted. Kohimu was the fastest runner among Sango and Miroku's children, so that was who Shippo tried to hunt down. He might've chosen Koinu, but if he did that Koinu would stay _it_ all day, preferring to chase and never actually catching his playmates.

At last Kohimu pushed Tisoki away from him and, with Tisoki stumbling from his older brother's roughness; they split up, running in opposite directions. Shippo dropped to a four-legged romp and picked up speed, closing in fast on Kohimu…and then stopped, halting so quickly that his hands and paws scraped up the grass and revealed earth beneath. His puffy tail twitched like a nervous squirrel's.

"Shippo?" Koinu came to stand fearlessly at the kit's side. "Did you get tired? I can be _it_ for awhile…" his blue eyes were just a little too excited by the idea, a little too eager and bright.

Shippo frowned and shook his head. He was panting—foxes weren't known for their cheetah-like speed or wolf-like endurance necessarily—but he wasn't ready to relinquish being _it_ to the pup. He exhaled sharply and then breathed through his nose purposefully. The scent that reached him was rich, heavy and it weighed on him more than a casual smell, like grass, bark, or the musk of wild animals. He could take in the smell with his nose as well as _taste _it, which was exactly why he'd noticed it while loping and panting through his mouth.

"Shippo?" Kasai spoke now, her little voice high and piping. It didn't match the rather fierce, almost angry expression over her face. She was a slayer's daughter, a warrior inside a small, seemingly fragile girl's body.

Up ahead Kohimu and Tisoki had stopped and were bent over, breathing deeply but watching attentively.

Shippo rose onto his hind legs again, having caught his breath, and hurried cautiously alongside the house. The children called to him concernedly and then, when he didn't stop, they took off running after him. Shippo followed his nose, his progress slowed as the scent grew stronger. It stirred something inside him, filling him with trepidation, and—something heavy, like weights on his shoulders. Dim memories reached out to him, warm tawny fur, the sweetness of milk…

He reached the corner of the house and stopped, feeling his hair and the fur of his tail bristling. Instinctually he felt his lips turning upward with a little snarl, exposing his fangs. There had been few kitsune in his life—a few other cubs that had been nothing but trouble to him—but no adults. Kitsune were sneaky, one didn't catch them in the middle of something. Shippo had come across old scents often, but never an active scent. And not one that seemed to reach out to him so personally…

"Come out!" he called, trying to sound brave, trying to growl and imitate Inuyasha. His voice made the children stop behind him. Kohimu and Tisoki assumed control, ordering Koinu and Kasai to go and tell Miroku, Sango, and Inuyasha.

The grass in the "backyard" as Kagome called it, was long and uncut. It grew wild and, until that morning when Kagome had taken her out, Rin's horse had eaten from the field. Shippo could still smell the rich stink of the mare's droppings, and see the passageways the horse had made with her eating habits. But inside that thick field of grass, he could smell and was beginning to see something completely unrelated to the mare.

A tail appeared, thick and long, over the top of the grass. Shippo stiffened and took a step backward as a large fox rose out of the field and walked toward him. Its eyes were bright, like sunlight, the fur shone dully. "Hello young one." It greeted him warmly.

"What do you want?" Shippo felt himself shrinking as the other kitsune drew nearer, curling into the ground, as if trying to disappear.

"Is everyone so unfriendly here? Even kin?" the fox asked, his lips smirked, revealing fangs that seemed inordinately white and massive to Shippo. He narrowed his eyes at Shippo, taking the kit in carefully. "You and I are from the same clan."

Shippo was flustered, he cringed pathetically. "I don't know you!"

"I didn't expect you to, but your nose tells you, doesn't it?" it cocked its head, still scrutinizing the kit. "Your color is wrong, young one, but we must be kin. I am Aojiroi Jinsoku." He dipped his head as if bowing, giving Shippo respect.

The names meant nothing to Shippo. He shook his head feebly and managed to spit out, "I'm Shippo." He'd never known his family's surname; it had died with his parents.

Jinsoku's expression warmed, lighting his eyes. "I mean you no harm, young Shippo. I have been sent by Lord Shimofuri of the Middle Lands. I must speak with Lady Rin."

Helplessly, Shippo stared up at the fox, feeling the weight growing inside him as Jinsoku's scent continued to assault him. Jinsoku was telling the truth—they were related, though Shippo would never know how exactly or whether they were distant cousins or much closer kin. He stuttered and stumbled over his answer. "She's inside."

Jinsoku nodded and ducked his head again in what might've been a bow if he were more human-like. "I thank you, young Shippo." The fox slipped away, running at an easy lope through the yard, heading for the front of the house.

Kohimu and Tisoki were fast to reach Shippo, their faces transformed into frowns. "Why didn't you stop it?" Kohimu blustered.

"And you told it where Rin was?" Tisoki choked, winded. "What's wrong with you?"

Shippo shook his head angrily, "He won't hurt her."

"How can you—"

But Shippo didn't wait for them to continue asking questions, he hurried off after Jinsoku on all-fours, his tawny tail high in the air.

* * *

A/n: and I am done for this chapter. Phew! 


	23. Blood For Blood

A/N it's so hot tonight. They said it would cool off. THEY LIED!!! I just watched the saddest, strangest, darkest movie thing. _Pan's Labyrinth._ I cried at the very end. They really aren't lying when they say it's a dark adult fantasy. I'm not sure whether I liked it or didn't. YOU WILL ALL HATE ME when you reach the end of this chapter. But I promise the update will come swiftly.

Disclaimer: Noooope…

* * *

Last Chapter: Sesshomaru massacred the Okorinbou lords. Shimofuri heard of the destruction and decided that it was time to give in to Sesshomaru's power. He sent a kitsune, Aojiroi Jinsoku to find Rin. Inuyasha and Kagome fought about her leaving for her era, Kagome won and left on the mare Roba. Inuyasha ran into Jinsoku but was trapped by kitsune magic. Jinsoku ran next into Shippo, they're related. Shippo told Jinsoku that Rin was inside. 

(I figure Rin's pregnancy is about in its seventh month, just for the FYI. Conception in late fall/winter. Ginrei follows by about a month.)

* * *

**Blood For Blood**

"Dad!" Koinu slammed open the front door and raced through it, panting. Kasai followed behind him, so winded that she'd been robbed of speech for the moment. Her straight black hair was falling out of her ponytail messily; her hands and feet were messy from the game of tag minutes ago. Her knees hadn't escaped the dirt either. Koinu appeared much the same, but that was a typical thing for the boy.

Koinu stumbled into the sitting room, tracking dirt and mud in with him. Sango and Miroku were sitting at the table, one holding Masuyo and the other trying to feed Akisame. Miroku was the first to look up when he heard Koinu's voice. He raised his eyebrows curiously, a smile quirked on his lips. "Koinu?"

The boy ignored him and shouted, "Daddy!" His blue eyes scoured the room for a second, then he scurried away and down the hall. Miroku and Sango watched him with a mixture of curiosity and worry. When their daughter appeared just behind Koinu, struggling to breathe and speak in the same instant, alarm replaced the minor worry of moments before.

"Kasai? Sweetie, what's going on?" Sango rose to her feet, leaving Akisame where she was sitting at the table with mashed food smeared over her cheeks. She frowned when she saw that her daughter had clearly been playing on her hands and knees—the front of her green and white kimono was plastered with dirt and grass stains. "Haven't I told you not to…"

Kasai, still panting, pushed her mother's worrying hands away irritably. She was the only daughter in a family of boys and it had done nothing to instill ladylike manners. "Demon." She puffed out, her violet eyes—Miroku's own but set in his daughter's small, round girlish face—were wide. She pointed with one hand back at the kitchen and the front door beyond it. "Out…side."

From down the hallway, Koinu's voice was growing higher with desperation. _"Daddy! Daddy!"_

Miroku rose from the table, Masuyo was still in his arms. "Kasai, watch your brother."

Kasai shook her head fervently. "Dad—"

"Don't argue with me." Miroku ordered her, sternly but quietly. As Kasai relented and crossed the room, already reaching her arms out to take her brother, Sango smiled with open appreciation at her husband. He had long ago begun leaving his staff unattended, away from his side, since they'd started their family. He carried it when they traveled just in case, but more and more over the years the famous perverted monk was more likely to be holding a baby spoon or a bottle. Nurturing his family had replaced an inherited vengeance.

As Miroku left the sitting room to retrieve their weapons, Koinu raced from the hallway. Tears were flowing down the boy's cheeks. His white dog ears—miniatures of Inuyasha's—were shaking atop his head. "Aunt Sango—where's _Daddy!"_ he demanded, desperately.

"Inuyasha went outside…" Sango frowned with frustration. Masuyo had been screaming early that morning with teething pains. Miroku had searched for sake to numb it, but Kagome didn't have any of it on hand. They'd been letting him suck on some of Akisame's old teething rings since then. In the midst of that she hadn't seen where Inuyasha had gone or why. She changed the topic at once when she heard shouting from outside. "Is everyone all right? Kohimu, Tisoki and…"

Koinu nodded, "I think so." He reached forward and snatched her hand up in both of his smaller ones. "Auntie, it's a kitsune youkai! He was talking to Shippo—"

"Kitsune?" Sango interrupted, beginning to breathe a preemptive sigh of relief. Fox demons were often more irritating than they were actually dangerous.

Miroku reappeared then, in one arm his old staff jangled, in the other Hiraikotsu was balanced. His gaze was directed beyond Sango and Koinu toward the front door as Shippo rushed in, followed by Kohimu and Tisoki, both of them red-faced and struggling to catch their breath. Tentatively, Miroku passed Hiraikotsu to Sango. "Do you think we'll have to fight a kitsune?"

"I really don't know…" she started to reply, but then Shippo's voice rose above their murmured conversation, interrupting them.

"Where is he?" the kit called.

"Who?" Miroku asked; his grip on his staff was tighter than it appeared, Sango could make out the tenseness of his lean body, ready to spring into action if the situation required it.

"The kitsune." Shippo stammered, blinking. "He was running straight for the door—you didn't see him come through here?"

"No, we only saw Kasai and Koinu." Sango was frowning worriedly, but her mind was working overtime. "Is he dangerous?"

"No, I don't think so." Shippo's tail was shaking, it was puffier than usual, like a cat's when it's been startled. His green gaze turned toward the hallway, thinking of Rin and Tsukiyume. He swallowed thickly. "Uh oh…"

* * *

Rin had risen from bed just before Jinsoku's arrival, and as the kitsune met and spoke with Shippo, she was bathing. Tsukiyume had gone before her and was dressing quietly when the scent of the messenger youkai reached her nostrils. Tsukiyume froze, tensing at first, and then relaxed at once as she recognized the scent of the Aojiroi clan. 

She turned, searching the room for the source of the scent. On the screened window, Tsukiyume could see the outline of a large fox just outside. Though it was seemingly impossible, Tsukiyume could feel its gaze digging into her. Clumsily, she sat on her futon and addressed the fox's shadow tentatively. "Aojiroi?"

The fox turned its head, its triangular ears pricked. Tsukiyume could even see the twitch of its whiskers. She closed her eyes to blink—and when she opened them again the fox was sitting before her, his mouth falling open in a very canine-grin. "Lady Tsukiyume."

"What are you doing here?" Tsukiyume demanded, whisperingly. "Inuyasha will slaughter you if he finds you for sure!"

The fox cocked its head a fraction to the right. "I have already crossed paths with him and left him inconvenienced, but time is of the essence. Where is Lady Rin?"

"She's in the bath." Tsukiyume clasped her hands together, finding that her palms were freshly damp and hot, sticky with her perspiration. "What do you need to tell her?"

The fox's face twisted, muscles rippling beneath skin and layers of fur. "Shishi-sama will no longer be able to keep her safe; he will not harbor her against Sesshomaru's wrath."

Tsukiyume's face was blank. Her response was slow in coming. "She won't be pleased."

"I was also meant to inquire as to her health, yours as well." The fox's tongue lolled as he grinned all over again. "Shishi-sama has instructed me to bring you back home at once."

"She's…doing well." Tsukiyume stammered, blinking. Shimofuri was desperate and pulling back, trying to save his own skin. Tsukiyume felt her heart hammering; she was filled with a mixture of relief and wild fear. Rin's flight from Sesshomaru, and his predictable, heartbroken rampage, had always loomed on Tsukiyume's mind as a weak choice for her older brother. Taking on Sesshomaru was just too much for Shimofuri, and Tsukiyume had no desire to see her brother die and lose his lands, their heritage, and their name.

"The child?" the fox asked, daring to be direct now. "How has she faired?"

Tsukiyume's ears laid flat. "She's fine, in all ways." She replied stiffly.

The fox nodded, ducking its head in a small bow, as if to apologize. "I can sense the indecision inside you, Lady Tsukiyume." His voice had grown softer, almost with what could've been called caring, "But what your brother has decided to do, it was brought on by a terrible twist in circumstances. He has chosen to take you and Lady Rin back into his custody to try and settle with Sesshomaru."

This news brought an angry frown to Tsukiyume's face. "All of this was a mistake, shishi-sama should never have let Rin do this—Sesshomaru will _kill_ him for sure." She struggled, trying to keep her voice steady, but feeling her chin quiver and tears prickling her eyes. "Rin will never go back to Sesshomaru."

The fox shifted his weight, cocking his head again. "She has no choice. She is his mate, she has his first child. By all natural laws, if he has not released her willingly, she has no right to leave him."

The laws and minds of youkai were different from humans. A woman might leave her cheating lover while pregnant with his child, but the mate of a youkai was bound to her mate by blood. Unhappy couples were more likely to kill one another than to leave. In some ways, Tsukiyume wondered if that was what Rin would do the moment she was left alone with Sesshomaru. In her time away, Rin had done little healing as far as Tsukiyume could see. She didn't speak of Sesshomaru at all; in fact she pretended he didn't exist. Even the child in her belly, growing steadily more apparent in her curving abdomen, she seemed to ignore at least verbally. Rin was a mass of confusion, lost, and caught between order and chaos. Whatever would heal her, it didn't seem to be distance.

"Rin won't ever see it that way." Tsukiyume muttered, frowning. She had neglected to throw in a proper title for the other woman, and this made the fox thump his large, bushy tail—a scolding motion, like making a _tsk_ sound with his tongue.

"Since Lady Tsukiyume and Lady Rin left shishi-sama," the fox began his explanation in a small, distant voice, "Sesshomaru has torn apart the Middle Lands. Lord Arasoizuki is dead. Lord Sasugainu has chosen to side with Sesshomaru to avoid death."

Tsukiyume interrupted the fox, her mouth falling open widely in shock and alarm. "Uncle Sasugainu?" she croaked.

The fox nodded solemnly. "Sesshomaru has sought out and killed the human Okorinbou samurai clan on his lands. He has amassed his armies and has begun advancing for shishi-sama." The fox pinned Tsukiyume meaningfully with his eyes. "Lady Rin is shishi-sama's _only_ bargaining tool, and currently it seems Sesshomaru has decided it is not enough."

There was so much news; so many shocks…Tsukiyume felt warm wetness flowing down her face, tears. "Then Sesshomaru has lost his mind and we're all done for."

"You and Lady Rin must return to shishi-sama." The fox reiterated, sternly.

Tsukiyume shook her head, scowling. "That isn't going to work!" her voice had grown higher, she sounded as if she were about to break into wild sobs.

The fox curled his lips with irritation. "This is what I was sent to tell you, Lady Tsukiyume. It is what your brother wishes for you."

Tsukiyume's ears were quivering wildly, her eyes roved over the room wildly though unseeingly as she thought frantically for a solution. "It's not enough to stop him from killing Shimofuri."

The fox made a snuffling noise, as if sneezing. "You must come with me." his ears folded backward. "This house is in an uproar; Inuyasha will return soon and stop us."

Tsukiyume could hear it clearly too, Koinu was running up and down the hall, calling out for his father. She closed her eyes tightly, her mind turning and curling in over itself. _What would stop Sesshomaru dead in his tracks? What would paralyze him?_

"You must hide, Aojiroi." Tsukiyume ordered him, her voice was tight and strained.

He ducked his head to acknowledge her request. "I can do that—but why? You must bring Lady Rin and come with me."

"She won't come with us—she would never come with you, Aojiroi. You should leave now and get away from here." Her ears were still quivering; tears sparkled in her orange-brown eyes.

The fox's gaze softened with affection. "I cannot return to your brother empty pawed." He replied, dropping the formality and speaking to her as if they were equals, or friends.

Tsukiyume closed her eyes, drawing a deep breath. "Hide here, I will write shishi-sama a letter explaining myself. I..." she swallowed thickly, "I will save him and deliver Rin back to Sesshomaru myself."

The fox's fur, on his back and his tail and around his neck, all bristled at once. "You cannot, my lady…"

"Hide!" Tsukiyume hissed. Footsteps were coming down the hall, thundering like a herd of elephants. The fox made a small noise, a grunt, and then he shrunk before her eyes, twisting down and melting into a new, different shape. Soon he sat on the floorboards as a small carved stone, small enough to fit into Tsukiyume's palm. She scooped him up and pushed the stone beneath her blankets, messing them up.

Kohimu and Shippo burst into the room, the human boy forced the screen door aside, the kitsune youkai appeared with a puff of air. Tsukiyume reached for her covers, as if to cover herself up, but stopped as she realized that she had long since dressed and the motion would look silly.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded, trying to sound irritable and not frightened.

"I'm sorry, Tsuki," Shippo replied gently, "We're looking for a kistune youkai." He blinked at her confusedly. "You haven't smelled him?"

Aojiroi's scent was all over the small room. Tsukiyume felt her face flushing red. "I was perfuming my hair—no." she lied. Even more incriminating was the fact that the scent of her hair oils was long since diminished. She hadn't used them since yesterday.

From the opposite end of the hall, Tsukiyume hears Sango and Rin speaking together. Sango, the only woman aside from Tsukiyume and Kasai, had been the one to enter the bathroom to check up on her. Now Rin was out of the bath, wrapped in a loose robe, and coming into their room to dress. Her face was pale as she entered, Sango followed closely behind—there was a small, thin sword at her waist, Tsukiyume noticed.

Rin glanced at the boys with annoyance. "Leave." In spite of the harsh command, her voice was shaking.

Shippo and Kohimu gave nervous, clumsy bows, and scooted past Sango. Shippo closed the door behind them as they exited.

"I didn't know you had a sword, Lady Sango!" Tsukiyume announced, laughing nervously. Mentally she smacked herself at how stupid and paranoid she knew she sounded. She smiled, trying to look stupid and young and ignorant.

Apparently the attempt succeeded, Sango threw her one perplexed glance and then turned her attention to Rin. "What would a messenger be doing here? Has he already spoken with you?"

Rin settled on her futon, which was next to Tsukiyume's but pressed against the wall and closest to the window. Her face was tight and pale; her long black hair flowed wetly around her face, still dripping. "No, he hasn't."

"Shippo said that the kistune wasn't sent by Sesshomaru, does that sound right to you?" Sango asked, her face was troubled, worried.

Rin pulled some of her hair forward, running her fingers through it. Her fingers shook, her face contorted with a grimace as her fingers snagged in her hair, pulling painfully. "I don't know." Her voice was weak.

Sango sighed gently, seeing how the news affected Rin so strongly. "I'm sorry." She murmured, then, slowly, she sat alongside Rin on the futon and reached tentatively for the other, younger woman's hair. "Let me help you."

Tsukiyume watched them, her ears falling backward. Rin allowed Sango to begin combing her hair, something she had begun to insist on doing herself. Now she let Sango act as a mother or a maid while she sat on the futon, shivering in her thin robe, water still rolling over her ivory skin. It would be cruel to turn over the traumatized Rin, but when it came down between her brother—flesh and blood—and the runaway mortal mate of Sesshomaru, Tsukiyume would choose her kin every time.

But nothing would go as planned, not for Rin, not for Tsukiyume, not for Shimofuri, and not even for Inuyasha.

From the opposite side of the house, a thumping sound ricocheted over the walls, then Koinu's voice rang out happily. _"Daddy!"_

Footsteps thudded heavily over the floorboards, entering the hallway and then reaching the door to Rin and Tsukiyume's room. He flung open the screen door without hesitation. "You!" he screamed, jabbing one clawed finger at Rin, "Get out of my house!"

* * *

Sesshomaru's army had not yet left the Western Lands. They stayed gathered, waiting for orders, thirsting for blood—but no order came from their leader for several days after the slaughter of the Okorinbou. They knew through rumor and story that they had been gathered to right a wrong against Sesshomaru, involving the loss of a mate. Most of them could relate to that in some way or another—a loss of some loved one as a hostage, in a war, by a rival. Most of them were ready to fight for Sesshomaru whether the cause was justified or not. 

But _not_ fighting was truly tiresome. Oushi led them in-field, and reported to Sesshomaru almost daily, waiting anxiously for orders. The problem was that Sesshomaru was like a phantom. He didn't pitch a tent, didn't find a building to occupy as general. Instead he haunted the dark forest on one side of the camp, usually on a cliff that overlooked the army below him. That was where Oushi was able to meet him, usually at dusk.

Then, unexpectedly, Daken appeared at the camp. Oushi met with him and learned that the old inuyoukai was eager to meet with Sesshomaru.

"You have news?" Oushi asked eagerly.

Daken grinned openly. "I have news that might bring Lord Sesshomaru out of skulking in those trees."

At dusk, Oushi and Daken ascended the hill, entering the deep, dark forest, and waited as the sun set. As the shadows lengthened and faded, as the sky flashed its last color, rich in yellows, oranges, and reds, they at last scented Sesshomaru nearby.

"Lord Sesshomaru." Oushi called, ducking in an abbreviated bow. Daken did the same, stiffly. The older inuyoukai was excited and the emotion hindered his limbs, making him appear older than he was when one looked at his body. If they could see his face, however, they would think he was far younger.

Sesshomaru appeared, bright against the blackness of the forest, about a hundred feet away. Seemingly he stepped clear of a large, towering pine tree, allowing Daken and Oushi to see him openly. Sometimes he had never bothered to show himself to Oushi, but today he not only appeared, he began walking forward slowly and steadily. His golden eyes were fixed heavily on Daken.

"Oushi." He acknowledged the younger inuyoukai without even glancing at him, "Daken."

They rose from their bows and waited as Sesshomaru finished his approach, coming to stand within twenty feet of them. The lord of the Western Lands was dressed in full battle regalia. His haori and hakama were more red and blue now than white, his sash however was still a bright, startling yellow. His armor was spiked and covered over his shoulders, stomach, and back—but not his legs, never his legs. They had to be unencumbered at all times to allow for speed. Also, unusually, he had pulled his hair high and out of his face. Except for the elegant, red-purple stripes on his cheeks, he was almost the mirror image of his infamous father, the great Inutaisho.

"Daken." Sesshomaru called, coldly.

"Lord Sesshomaru." Daken ducked his head again, his voice shook slightly.

"You have returned to me. I warned you not to come back unless you had…" somehow, though it shouldn't have been possible, the great Lord of the Western Lands stumbled wile he spoke. It was an embarrassing, telling thing for him to do while dressed so nobly, while he stood poised for a war. "…unless you had word of her."

Oushi kept his eyes on the ground, praying that Daken had returned with something good—enough to soothe Sesshomaru. It didn't seem possible. Months had passed and there had been nothing from Daken. Sesshomaru had waited, but part of that wait sprang from having lost hope. Sesshomaru was not really a patient creature, not at all.

"I have word, my lord." Daken announced, daring to meet the younger inuyoukai's gaze directly. What he saw there made him look away almost immediately. Sesshomaru's hawk-like golden eyes were lit heavily from within, glowing hauntingly. He looked like Inutaisho returned from the dead.

"Speak." Sesshomaru ordered him.

"In the east, near the coast, I heard a rumor beginning. A refugee from the Middle Lands, passing into the coastal plains—a youkai of justice, a punisher of wrongdoings—two _women._ The story came from three bandits that were put to death in that region recently. They tried to attack two women on the road—_alone._ They were dressed richly, but when they were attacked they fought back and killed most of the bandits. The men swore that only one of them was youkai—inuyoukai. The other was a mortal woman who wielded a youkai blade." Daken smirked and shifted nervously as his tale finished. Sesshomaru's expression hadn't changed; he was more like stone than he was a real, living creature hearing rumor of his lost lover.

"Did you hear the name of the youkai blade?" Sesshomaru asked, distantly.

"No—but its attack made the men fall to the ground and convulse. They died within minutes. The description that I gained from one of the bandits' surviving companions described Lady Rin and Tsukiyume perfectly." Daken's voice intensified slightly as he reached his point. "She is on the coast, my lord."

"You do not have a specific location?" Sesshomaru's lips quirked once, turning downward. It was a very bad sign.

Daken chuckled nervously, his voice quavering. "No, Lord Sesshomaru." He cringed, as if about to turn tail and run, but Daken was too old to flee, too accustomed to obedience. Oushi, at his side, was cringing more openly, expecting a slaughter.

It didn't come. Sesshomaru had fallen silent, his golden eyes had unfocused, he was seeing through Oushi and Daken as he turned inward. The forest animals squeaked and howled around them as the minutes dragged onward. The distant smell of smoke from the army's campfires reached Oushi and Daken's sensitive noses. At last, Daken called Sesshomaru's name timidly. "Lord Sesshomaru?"

The inuyoukai's eyes flicked up to Daken, seeming to light up the blackness of the forest. "The coast." He repeated, and his lips disappeared into a thin, heavily compressed line. His eyes widened, his jaw squared with rage.

Daken opened his mouth to ask if Sesshomaru would desire him to end his own life for failing him, but at that moment Sesshomaru spoke to Oushi sharply. "Prepare the army. Have them march for the border of the Middle Lands, for the Hokubo and Sasugainu."

Oushi bowed, "Yes, my lord."

"Send messengers to Sasugainu informing him of my plans."

"Yes, lord." Oushi had not yet risen from his bow.

"Leave—Daken, you will accompany him."

Stunned at the reprieve from the death he'd expected, Daken stammered, "Lord Sesshomaru—have I displeased you with my news? Was it not sufficient?"

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes in a glare of annoyance. His voice was dark and firm now. "You have done well, Daken. I will give you new orders when I return from the coast."

The old inuyoukai bowed, sweat from his profound relief poured over his forehead, dripping onto the leaf litter and pine needles below their feet. "Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru."

* * *

"_Get out of this house!"_ Inuyasha screamed again when three pairs of female eyes gawked back at him blankly. He was enraged, dirt smudged over his face, dirtied his hakama and haori, twigs and leaves were caught in his long flowing hair. His hands were fisted at his sides, clenching and unclenching. 

"Inuyasha…" Sango began, rising to her feet uncertainly, but the hanyou snapped at her, silencing her attempt to soothe him.

"Get out of here Sango; I'm not talking to you."

The demon slayer frowned and crossed her arms over her chest. "Fine, Inuyasha." She passed by him stiffly and threw him a glare that said clearly, _Kagome will hear about your behavior later. _

When she was gone, Inuyasha resumed his attack. "I won't have you endangering us anymore, bitch!" he was glaring pointedly at Rin, but his focus changed to Tsukiyume when Rin failed to look back at him or challenge him in any way. "Take her—_cousin—_and get out! Go back to Shimo-kun!"

Koinu had followed his father down the hallway and was now hiding just out of sight, his ears flattened, his eyes pooling with tears. He whimpered with fear audibly when Inuyasha stopped yelling for a moment. "Daddy…"

More bawling started from the other room—Akisame was reacting the exact same way to her father's raging. She called out unintelligibly for her mother, father, and brother.

Inuyasha frowned, turning his attention from Tsukiyume and Rin to stare at Koinu. His ears drooped pathetically. "Koinu—stop that! Don't cry!" his scolding, although not overly harsh, made his young son start to sob outright.

The pup raced forward and wrapped his little arms around his father's leg, pressing his face into the hakama. "_Daddy—_Momma says she's my aunt!" he pulled on his father's pants, blubbering.

"Dammit!" Inuyasha growled, rubbing his face with his hands despairingly. Why did Kagome always undermine him? She wasn't even there to fight him on the topic and he still couldn't boot Rin out on her ass. What was worse was that Koinu would _know_ that Rin was related to them—the child inside her would smell strongly like their family. Koinu was too young to understand the greater dangers, the problems with keeping the runaway Rin with them. All that he understood was that Rin had acted as his teacher for several weeks now and he had grown fond of her—and her scent compelled him instinctually to fight for her.

Tsukiyume took the moment of pause in Inuyasha's ranting to leap into action. She moved from her futon and knelt in front of Rin. "Lady Rin—please, we can't stay here any longer."

Rin was shaking, but she lifted her eyes to stare back at Tsukiyume when she spoke to her. "Where else will we go?"

"I will take you." Tsukiyume announced, quietly whispering, "I'll…" she paused, feeling her heart pounding, her mouth drying up, "I can take you to his wife."

Rin frowned. "He would find me there." She was perplexed, but at the same time there was a gleam in her dark eyes, a thought that was barely repressed, barely restrained just beyond.

"You could meet her." Tsukiyume snatched Rin's hand and stammered, feeling her courage failing. The darkness of what she was saying, the idea of it…she could succeed or fail horribly, but she guessed that Rin would be unable to fight the baseness of her emotions, the hurt, the betrayal. Tsukiyume could manipulate the jilted girl into leaving Inuyasha's home and heading for the Isei—and then, once they were there, they could use Ginrei as a hostage, forcing Sesshomaru to cease his hostility and leave Shimofuri alone. And Tsukiyume would hand Rin over to him…

"I don't want to meet her." Rin snarled, her fire at last returning. She ripped her hand out of Tsukiyume's.

Tsukiyume dropped the bait, knowing it would destroy Rin all over again, forcing her to commit to Tsukiyume's dark suggestion and the manipulation that would follow. "His wife is pregnant, you know."

Rin froze, staring at Tsukiyume, wide-eyed. Her mouth had fallen open slightly, but she didn't speak or even breathe through it.

"Your baby and hers will be almost the same age—siblings." It should've been a hint to Rin that Tsukiyume's ears were steady, but the girl missed it in her fresh pain. That Tsukiyume wasn't showing the right emotion, that it was a lapse in her character, didn't reach her. Only the fresh revelation—and the searing pain that she had kept buried for so many months.

Rin placed her hands over her belly, her face hardened; her eyes stared through Tsukiyume now, not seeing her.

"Hey!" Inuyasha interrupted them. Koinu was in his arms now, crying against his shoulder. Akisame was screaming in the other room still. "I haven't finished with you two. I want you out of here! Today!"

Rin turned to face him now, snarling. "Get out of the way and we'll be gone."

Inuyasha's ears pricked up, as if he couldn't believe her words. "What?"

"We're leaving—just like you want. Now get out so I can get dressed."

The hanyou regarded her doubtfully, apparently certain that she was lying, but he moved out of the doorway anyway and slid the door shut loudly behind him.

When they were alone, Rin ordered Tsukiyume immediately. "Help me get dressed."

At first Tsukiyume wondered if Rin had reverted to her royal persona, one that she'd abandoned after they'd left the Middle Lands together because it was something she felt Sesshomaru had instilled in her, and not natural at all. But as she gathered up a few of Rin's older, more elaborate robes, she realized that Rin was unable to dress herself. Her fingers shook, her breathing was erratic, her shoulders shook. The news of Ginrei's pregnancy, so close to her own, had truly shaken the other woman.

When Rin was dressed, her hair combed and piled atop her head as well, she left to get food for their journey and for a little breakfast for herself. Tsukiyume declined and stayed inside the room until Rin had left. She closed the screen door and hurriedly went to one of the small cupboards in the walls of their room to fetch an inkwell, a brush, and paper. It was mismatched paper, a little of the horizontal blue lines that Kagome used for "English lessons" but Tsukiyume turned it sideways and used the blue lines so that they were vertical instead.

The fox reappeared behind her, huffing and breathing loudly. Apparently the transformation took great effort from him. He sat at her side tensely. "My lady, what are your plans? Why would you take Lady Rin to Sesshomaru's wife?"

"Because he won't ever see it coming, and it gives me control over him." she blew impatiently on the ink and folded the paper up. "I can save Shimofuri this way."

The fox looked doubtful. "Please, be careful, Lady Tsukiyume. Lord Shimofuri would never wish you to do this for him."

She held the note out to him and the fox lifted his head, exposing a loose cord of hemp around his neck. A few cords of it were left untied for just this purpose. Tsukiyume tied the note into the hemp collar carefully, though her fingers were clumsy.

At last the fox pulled away from her and bowed. "I pray you and Lady Rin have safe travel and that soon we will see each other again in the Middle Lands with shishi-sama."

Tsukiyume nodded and bowed to him as well. "I'll pray for the same, Aojiroi. Safe travel."

The fox turned and vanished. Outside the screened window, Tsukiyume saw its shadow dash away, fading.

* * *

They left only a short time later, after Miroku brought Roba back from the well where Kagome had left the mare to graze. Miroku, Kohimu, Tisoki, Shippo, and Sango helped pack the horse up with supplies for the journey. Inuyasha watched irritably from a distance, tending his two crying children. Akisame cried because Kagome was gone, Koinu cried because Akisame was crying and because Rin was leaving and because Kagome was gone. Kasai stayed with Koinu, trying to cheer him up too. 

"I would pay you for keeping me here," Rin told Inuyasha, "but you have refused my offer in the past." She had regained her composure, though it was cold and stiff. She effected a very refined imitation of Sesshomaru, though she likely didn't mean to.

"Feh." He grumbled, "You can pay me by leaving before Kagome gets back."

Rin ignored his ill temper. She was holding a small, thin sheath. The handle of the blade was small and carved from stone. It was ivory-white. Characters were scrawled just beyond the handle, at the very base of the blade. Rin pulled it out slowly, pushing it toward Inuyasha across the sitting table, in spite of the growling sound he was making. "This blade is _Izoukago._ It was made for me to use as a child. It can be used by your children or your wife. It is meant for a human hand, but it will defend against powerful youkai. It feeds off ill-will. Your foes' own hatred will empower the blade."

Inuyasha looked between Rin and the blade, uneasily. "Can I have it changed for Koinu?"

The boy, when his name was mentioned in conjunction with the blade, forgot his tears. He made a small gasping sound and stared at his father and then at Rin. Akisame, in her father's lap, was grunting and reaching for the sword already.

Rin nodded. "It is yours." She tried to smile, but her eyes were hollow, empty.

Inuyasha paused only a moment longer, than snatched the sheath from Rin and pulled it closer. Tentatively, he touched the blade—only to feel it sparking lightly against his fingertips. He grunted. "What's that mean?"

"You have too much youkai blood."

Akisame imitated her father, crying out shrilly with her eagerness. "Daddy! Daddy!" when her tiny clawed hands landed on the handle, nothing happened. The sword accepted her touch.

Seeing this, Inuyasha gave a half-hearted grunt and, almost sheepishly, muttered, "Thanks."

Rin bowed, wordlessly.

Sango and Miroku decided it was time to head back home. Shippo also decided he would leave. They would accompany Rin and Tsukiyume for a time, keeping them company and keeping them safe. Rin offered Miroku and Sango a blade in payment as well, a small, lightweight sword called _Burikko._ It was a blade forged for human women alone. The couple accepted the sword gratefully. It would be passed to Kasai, their only daughter, when she was old enough to handle it properly.

To Shippo she offered a dagger, but the kit turned the weapon down, refusing to accept anything she offered. He was a fox, and foxes lived by their wits and their own powers. They didn't rely on swords or daggers.

By the time everything was prepared it was nearly nightfall. Koinu and Akisame had stopped crying, they were absorbed with goodbyes. Kasai cuddled Akisame and tweaked Koinu's ears one last time. Then the small caravan—Shippo, Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, Sango, and Miroku holding baby Masuyo, as well as Rin and Tsukiyume of course—at last left the estate, following the path down the mountainside for Kaede's old village.

The house was thickly silent without the crowd it had once sheltered. Inuyasha herded Koinu and Akisame into the master bedroom that he shared with Kagome, and curled up with them to put them to sleep. Although he hadn't meant to, Inuyasha found that fatigue soon brought his own eyelids down and dreams washed over him. He was making love to Kagome, pinning her beneath him when she hadn't expected it, hearing her laugh and giggle. She was pregnant, her scent washed over him—melded with both Akisame and Koinu's scents. She was going to have twins? His mind switched gears and the dream darkened. The woman beneath him was Rin then and he was repulsed—until he realized that he'd lost control of his demonic blood and attacked her.

And Sesshomaru was coming…like a tornado rushing out of the rice fields, or a water spout from over the sea…

Wind rattled the screens, violently. Inuyasha jerked awake at once, gasping. His eyes adjusted to the dark, focusing. His heart pounded inside his ears, sweat rimmed the neckline of his haori and down his back. When he moved he was sticky everywhere.

Groggily, he pulled himself from the bed. It was a long, difficult task because every movement could wake one of his children. At last Inuyasha moved to the screen and opened it slightly, peeking out into the nighttime. The wind had picked up, dust flew under the moonlight, but the stars were still visible. It was probably about midnight.

Inuyasha shut the screen quietly and slipped out of the room. What had woken him? Had Kagome returned?

The hallway was filled with moving air. A wind was rising from the kitchen—the front door was open. Inuyasha frowned worriedly. There were no lights burning inside the house; it was completely dark except for where the screens over the windows allowed some light to peer through.

The front door was wide open. Inuyasha felt the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. He sniffed carefully, but the wind smelled only of pollens, insects, dirt, and humidity. There was nothing out of the ordinary.

He checked for Kagome's shoes on the verandah before he closed the front door. They weren't there. _How long was she going to be gone? Damn that woman, always lying to me… _But he was smiling as he thought it.

As he closed the door disappointedly, the hanyou was jolted from his thoughts as he at last noticed the floor. In the sliver of moonlight still coming from the door that he had almost closed, Inuyasha could see the ring of dirt around an imprint on the floor. It was in the shape of a shoe. A large shoe, similar in size to his own—but it wasn't a sandal like Miroku's; it was a boot of some kind.

Inuyasha's heart began fluttering inside him, his stomach twisted up in a knot. "No," he growled, "Fuck no…"

From the master bedroom, Inuyasha heard Koinu scream.

Horror and rage erupted inside him. _No, no you fucker, NO!_

"_KOINU!"_ he ran, leaping over the sitting table that was in the way, skidding down the hallway, half on his hands and knees. Over his own rushed breathing, he heard Akisame start to scream for him.

The door to the master bedroom, which he'd closed moments ago, was thrown wide open now. Inuyasha stormed into it without thought, without hesitation. At last the scent of the intruder reached him. His eyes adjusted after a single blink, but by scent he already knew who was threatening his family.

"_Sesshomaru!"_

The Lord of the Western Lands, Inuyasha's older brother, and his children's uncle, stood towering over the futon where Koinu and Akisame had been sleeping innocently, mere seconds ago. Akisame was now in the corner of the room, screaming desperately for help and crying her brother's name despairingly. Koinu was pinned against Sesshomaru's chest, against hard, poking armor, and with his uncle's clawed, poisonous hand wrapped around his little face. Koinu was very much still alive, the pup was clawing, kicking, and screaming past the inuyoukai's hand.

Inuyasha reached instinctually for his waist, for Tetsusaiga, only to remember that the blade was stashed underneath the futon. Sesshomaru stood between him and the blade. He was growling continuously in the back of his throat, his arms and legs were shaking with rage.

"_Get your fucking hands off him, Sesshomaru!"_

Sesshomaru turned slowly to face Inuyasha. Even in the dark, Inuyasha could see his older brother's eyes were red as rage took over the hawk-like gold.

When Sesshomaru spoke it was loud and harsh—more so than Inuyasha had ever heard his brother. "I can smell her—but she isn't here_. Where is Rin?" _

Sesshomaru shifted his hand over Koinu's mouth, pressing harder. The boy cried harder, flinching. Fat tears rolled out of his eyes. "Tell me or your son dies."

* * *

A/N: Okay, yes, I know. You will hate me, strangle me if you could, but I promise, deep breaths, it'll pass...and then before you know it the next one will come. :-) 


	24. The Promise

A/N: Oh yeah, I know I am evil. Yessss! It feels so deliciously good! Hehe. But now your torture is over, here is the conclusion to last chapter's cliffhanger. I promised you it would come soon, I had it ready and waiting in the wings. **A thought for all of you!!**

I have been considering my next projects after _Runaway_ and _I Miss You_ are completed. I do need to consider _Mad Season_ (which functions as a oneshot right now) and definitely _Women In Black,_ but I like dabbling with the universe I've created in _Hanyou, With Our Arms Wide Open, _and now _Runaway._ I'd like to keep expanding it and this was my first rough idea:

(Title may change) **Innocence:** After the fall of Naraku, Miroku and Sango's beloved--and perverted--daughter Kasai has become a demon slayer with her older brothers. Koinu, Inuyasha and Kagome's son, is smitten with Kasai, but she just can't--or won't--see it. When Kasai is kidnapped to be sold into prostitution, it falls to Koinu to rescue her--and prove himself along the way.

So what do you think? Drop me a line if you like, or even if you don't and have better suggestions. I am always listening.

Disclaimer: nope, don't own Inuyasha or Sesshomaru, but Koinu, Akisame, Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, Masuyo, Tsukiyume, and Ginrei are all mine.

* * *

Last chapter: The fox spoke to Tsukiyume, and Tsuki hatched a quasi-plan to save her brother and return Rin to Sesshomaru. Daken, Sesshomaru's messenger and spy, returned with word that Rin and Tsukiyume had beaten the hell out of some bandits earlier, en route to the coast. This tipped Sess off—the only place he knew she might be able to be safe was at Inuyasha's home, near the coast. Tsukiyume told Rin that Ginrei is pregnant. Rin wants to go and "meet" Ginrei. She gave blades to Inuyasha and Miroku and Sango for their protection of her during her time there. Miroku and Sango left with Rin, so did Shippo. After they left, Inuyasha found he had an intruder in the house a few hours later, Sesshomaru. Sess now holds Koinu ready to kill him unless Inuyasha talks.

* * *

**The Promise**

"_Get your fucking hands off him!"_ Inuyasha repeated, tensing as if about to step forward to wrestle Koinu out of his older brother's grip. Sesshomaru had only one hand, how could he stand a chance? But forcing Sesshomaru to give Koinu up could hurt the boy. Inuyasha kept himself in check—barely.

"_Dah-dah!"_ Akisame screeched. The toddler rushed on her unsteady but strong legs, moving with all four limbs as if she were a dog. She skirted around the futon and launched herself at Inuyasha's legs. The hanyou noted that Sesshomaru tracked the tiny child's progress carefully as well. At first Inuyasha was certain he was considering harming Akisame as well, but then he caught the flicker of a muscle in Sesshomaru's jaw.

In the heat of the moment, Inuyasha could never know that his older brother was seeing Inuyasha's black-haired, golden-eyed daughter and wondering if his daughter with Rin would look the same. In fact, when he'd entered the room to snatch up the children, he'd intended to take Akisame because she was smaller and weaker, easier to hold with his single arm. But when he'd see his niece, unexpected emotions overtook him. Tenderness, regret, melancholy…and then Koinu had woken and screamed and Sesshomaru had instinctually taken the boy, leaving Akisame.

"Get behind me, Aki." Inuyasha ordered her through gritted teeth. She obeyed, but she was babbling and sobbing Koinu's name repeatedly.

Koinu's small claws were digging fiercely into Sesshomaru's forearm, into the meaty part of his palm. The boy was also squirming and moving his mouth, trying to bite Sesshomaru's hand. Sesshomaru shifted the boy, squishing his little back into the spikes of his body armor along his shoulder. Koinu squealed behind his hand. His tiny ears quivered.

Inuyasha made a sound in his throat, a cross between a hiss—as if Koinu's pain had been his own—and a snarl. "Damn you Sesshomaru! Koinu has nothing to do with your stupid bitch! It's _me_ you want, dammit!"

"Where is she?" Sesshomaru growled, deeply. His eyes were still golden on the outsides, but inside they were burning red.

"She left a while ago!" his ears flattened, his fists clenched up. Akisame was screaming behind him, actually using full words and sentences, and Koinu was crying in Sesshomaru's grasp, and Kagome was missing. All of it weighed on Inuyasha, half-overwhelming him. It was no wonder that their father had had only one pup and one mate at a time. "_Put Koinu down, you fucker!"_

"_Let go Kooo-nu…!"_ Akisame was howling.

Sesshomaru blinked, scrunching up his face. His niece's wails were affecting him as well. He had been into the room where Rin had stayed; he'd scented her time there, her changing scent over months. He knew she was still pregnant and still healthy. Soon there would be a daughter like Akisame in his world, and the knowledge alone—and also the fact that he was not inclined to kill helpless youngsters—had filled his system with a paternal, protective drive.

This room stank of sweat and tears—but also of the family's shared blood. Inutaisho's line continued in Inuyasha's offspring. _These were his kin._ He couldn't escape it. Even Koinu's tears made his skin bristle and crawl. It was impossible to kill any of one of them.

Inuyasha was breathing thickly; his eyes were wide and round with desperation and panic. He licked his lips and blurted everything he knew regarding Rin's whereabouts. "She's on the road going to the Middle Lands! Tsukiyume is with her—_dammit—_put him down, you bastard!" he edged forward two steps, his arms made partial reaching motions, as if he would reach out for his son.

Koinu whimpered and let go of his uncle's wrist to reach for his father. His little blue eyes squeezed out more frantic tears. Blood trickled Sesshomaru's wrist where Koinu's small but tough claws had pierced the skin.

Sesshomaru hesitated a moment, then moved his hand, releasing the boy's mouth and gripping him more by the shoulders instead. He brought the boy out a little and narrowed his eyes at his brother's son, almost curiously. The boy had inherited almost everything as far as his father's appearance, but while Inuyasha at a similar age would've fought and cursed, this boy glared back with an almost hurt expression in his blue eyes.

And then, abruptly, the boy's mouth worked and he made a sound like a cough—and a wad of bloodied spittle hurtled onto Sesshomaru's chin. As Sesshomaru recoiled instinctually, loosening his grip on the boy, Koinu grabbed at his uncle's armor and seamlessly lowered himself to the ground in the blink of an eye. Inuyasha was fast to move in and snatch his son from the floor hurriedly and into a crushing embrace. The boy clung to his father, crying soundlessly. Akisame reached for her brother from the floor, calling his name concernedly.

Having wiped away the spit, Sesshomaru faced his weaponless brother and his two young, vulnerable offspring one last time. A distant part of him might've desired to make some sort of apology, or to thank Inuyasha for taking care of Rin and for telling him where she was. A part of him might've felt, for the first time, a small twinge of regret for their violent, unfriendly history with one another. As a father, Inuyasha had a lot to share with him…

But they were beyond that. Now the only thing they shared was their father's blood and his genes. And Inuyasha was too young even to remember their father—if he had been able to remember, he would've been unnerved by Sesshomaru's armor and the way he had tied his hair back.

Inuyasha spoke then, growling, "Where's Kagome, you fucker!"

Sesshomaru was unmoved and unworried. "You mean your mate?"

"_Where is she!"_

How strange, Sesshomaru thought, they mirrored one another's questions now. "I have done nothing to your mate, little brother. Step aside."

Inuyasha growled fiercely, but as his brother took a step forward, the hanyou gave way, stepping over his daughter and kneeling to scoop her up with his other free arm. It left him absolutely defenseless to Sesshomaru, if he had attacked, but it was clear just where Inuyasha's concerns lied, and they weren't for himself. He moved into the hallway and out of Sesshomaru's way stiffly.

"If you're lying, Sesshomaru…" he muttered, "I'll kill you myself."

Sesshomaru didn't stop walking and didn't turn to look back. "The same goes for you, little brother."

He disappeared outside the front door and Inuyasha collapsed onto the floor exhaustedly, giving in at last to the shaking of his muscles, the pull of his adrenaline. In the days before he'd taken Kagome as a mate and wife, he'd never imagined there could be anything worse than Naraku, anything worse than having lost Kikyo, or worse than having Kagome or his friends nearly die. Yet, with the births of his son and daughter, he'd found the worst possible loss—that of a child.

Akisame and Koinu still clung to him, crying and sobbing, but their cries didn't bother Inuyasha any longer, in fact they were a comfort. Those were ordinary sounds. His children were alive…

He cradled them to his chest until they'd both fallen asleep in that position, and he was still awake, watching over them when footsteps came at the front door again. A light, gentle female tread that Inuyasha recognized from the moment he heard it. Kagome entered the house, pausing worriedly when she saw that the front door was wide open, and then she stopped dead when she spotted Inuyasha with their babies cradled and sleeping in his arms.

His expression was dark, angry.

"Inuyasha?" she whispered, stepping forward and kneeling at his side. She saw the bruises on Koinu's face, the blood on his lips and from his nose and gasped, covering her mouth with her hands. "What's happened?"

"I fuckin' told you. I fuckin' told you so many times, Kagome…"

She stared at him, wide-eyed and shocked. "Inuyasha…?"

"That bitch Rin." He snarled bitterly. "You wanted her here even though I told you it was _fucking stupid._ And now that she finally left—guess who walks right through that same damned door you just did."

She already knew, and couldn't say it aloud, but her lips moved, forming the syllables.

"So _fucking stupid…_" he repeated, wrenching his eyes closed. His clawed hands moved tenderly over Koinu and Akisame, stroking the hair on their sleeping heads.

Tears clouded Kagome's eyes. "I'm so sorry, Inuyasha. I…" her shoulders began to shake and she reached out tentatively toward their son, trying to see the wounds on his face. Her hands shook. "Are they okay?"

"They'll be fine." He growled, and pinned her firmly with his angry gaze. "But maybe next time you'll _listen_ when I tell you something is _fucking stupid._ Because next time…" his throat closed, cutting off his words. He couldn't say it aloud, couldn't say that maybe next time it would cost them a child's life, maybe both, or maybe they would lose each other. There was a lot at stake.

When he turned his face away from her, Kagome saw clearly the glitter of unshed tears in the hardened, stolid hanyou's eyes.

"Oh, Inuyasha." Kagome at last gave into her sobs as well and through her arms around his shoulders, pressing him and their children to her in one motion. "I'm _so sorry…"_

* * *

The village that Miroku and Sango choose for the night was very close to Kaede's village, a sort of sibling village, they were only a short ways downriver. In a distant future these villages would grow together and become the city of Tokyo someday. The inn that tried to house them used two rooms to do it. One for Miroku and the boys, the other for Sango, Kasai, Tsukiyume, Rin, and the baby Masuyo. Because the women got the slightly larger room, they ate there, together. 

The room was loud and rambunctious as the meal was served. On the road Kohimu, Kasai, Shippo, and Tisoki had been well behaved and proper, now they gave in and acted like children again.

"You know, Kasai likes Koinu." Kohimu announced to the table while gloating at his younger sister proudly.

"I do not!" the girl screeched back at him, frowning.

"Kohimu's right. You spend a lot of time touching his ears. Uncle Inuyasha thinks it isn't very nice because Aunt Kagome is always doing it to him. And you know she doesn't just touch his ears." Tisoki grinned mischievously.

"Of course I touch his ears!" Kasai shouted irritably, "He has really soft ears!"

"See what I mean?" Tisoki asked, looking from his older brother to Shippo knowingly.

Miroku had taken note of his sons' conversation and sighed, rolling his eyes. "Tisoki—stop teasing your sister."

"But she just said it's true! And Kohimu started it!"

"Yeah," Kohimu put in smirking, "But _you're_ the pervert, so _you_ get in trouble."

Tisoki wasn't ready to give up yet. Frantically, he pointed toward Shippo. "Why don't you like pulling on Shippo's tail, Kasai? Why is it always Koinu that you touch?"

Shippo scowled. "Hey—no one touches my tail."

"I bet there are little village girls and stuff that do." Tisoki gloated, snickering as if he were very clever indeed.

The kit was unimpressed. "You know—you're just like Miroku used to be, but dumber."

This made the children break out laughing and Tisoki's face reddened at once. "I am not!"

Miroku worked very hard to pretend that he hadn't heard them. At his side Sango was mashing food up for Masuyo and feeding it to him carefully. As Masuyo took in some food and swallowed it, she grinned down at him and tickled his stomach. "What a good little boy you are!"

Masuyo gurgled and smiled back at her—then hiccupped and spit up part of his previous mouthful.

"Let's not have anymore boys, Sango." Miroku sighed, leaning to whisper into her ear.

"Boys are fine." She answered, still grinning as she used her fingers to clean up Masuyo's messy face and chest. "Just no more perverts."

Though they hadn't noticed it, Rin was watching Sango and Masuyo carefully. Rin had never seen how to care for a baby, her own mother had never taught her. Sango's feeding was educating Rin though the demon slayer would have no idea. Rin could feel her daughter moving inside of her, kicking strongly. Her belly had grown larger than ever before in her life, and now she felt the baby moving on a very regular basis.

Beside her Tsukiyume picked over her food slowly, and with unusual silence. She made simple answers to everyone, even to Shippo when he tried to engage her in conversation.

The maids came to take their trays away. When one knelt beside Tisoki the boy reached out and caught her hand before she could take his tray. "Miss, you're really pretty." He grinned stupidly at her and continued holding her hand.

The woman blushed and then glanced toward Miroku and Sango uncertainly. "Thank you…"

"Will you kiss me?"

"I'll take your food away, how about that?" she tried very hard not to laugh.

Tisoki's shoulders sagged. "I guess that's good." He let go of her hand and watched her walk away as if he were still hungry.

Kohimu was laughing, "Tisoki—you're nothing but a little kid! You could be her son!"

"You're just jealous!" Tisoki harrumphed, crossing his arms over his chest and pouting suspiciously like Inuyasha.

"Why would I be jealous of you? I'm the one with the talent and the looks. You're like my perverted sidekick." Kohimu beamed arrogantly, looking down his nose at his younger brother. "Besides, I'm older than you anyway. Older brothers always kick ass."

Tisoki frowned and turned toward their parents. "Mom! Kohimu said _ass."_

Sango ignored them, letting Miroku deal with it instead. "Kohimu, you know you're not supposed to say that."

"Uncle Inuyasha says it." Kohimu grumbled.

"Uncle Inuyasha's cooler than you." Kasai added, giggling.

Kohimu lunged for her angrily. "No one asked you!"

Now at last Sango looked up, setting aside the chopsticks and the bowl of mashed food she'd been feeding Masuyo. "Kohimu," she called, stopping her son in mid-motion, "If I hear you saying bad words again, and if you try to hurt your sister like that—I'm going to make you change and wash Masuyo's diapers. Do you understand me?"

Kohimu settled back into his spot at the table and lowered his eyes defeatedly. "Yes, Mother."

Sango turned her attention on Tisoki who was snickering victoriously. "You, young man—how many times have I told you not to emulate your father?"

Tisoki blinked at her. "What?"

Miroku answered him, throwing Sango a small, pained look as he did so. "Your mother means stop talking to women that way—and _never_ touch them."

"I didn't do anything wrong!" Tisoki complained, "I just told her the truth! And what's wrong with touching her hand?"

"Not her hands, son." Miroku elaborated, leaning forward, "Other places, like her—"

Sango elbowed him in the chest, cutting him off. "Her hands are fine, Tisoki."

Outside, in the courtyard, a woman cried out. Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and Rin lifted their heads, taking swift notice of the sound. "Should we investigate?" Miroku asked.

"It's probably nothing." Shippo started, only to stop as another scream came to them, shouts of alarm from outside.

Wind rattled the screens, shaking them loudly. Tsukiyume flattened her ears; her heart took off with fear as she thought she caught something in the breeze, a scent. _Sesshomaru…_

But she wasn't imagining it, Shippo's face blanched as well and he looked directly at Tsukiyume and Rin. "I think Sesshomaru's found you."

Rin had frozen, stiff as a board. Her heart and her daughter moved inside of her, but Rin felt as if she had been removed, hollowed out, left with nothing but fear burning madly at the edges of her mind. She closed her eyes, fighting sudden tears. A voice escaped her lips that she couldn't recognize as her own. "Please…don't let him take me…"

Miroku and Sango had changed gears, moving for their weapons in one corner of the room. Kohimu and Tisoki had quieted and moved to do the same. Shippo rose from his seat and moved toward the screen door. He didn't open it, but instead knelt, closed his eyes, and vanished.

"Kasai, watch Masuyo." Sango ordered sternly. Kasai nodded wordlessly and moved to pick up her infant brother.

Miroku took up his staff and then left Sango as she readied Kohimu and Tisoki for a potential fight. He crossed the room discreetly and knelt beside Tsukiyume and Rin. "Please, I must ask you ladies to leave us. Sesshomaru has no need with us, he's after you."

Rin's eyes were wide with terror. She shook her head helplessly, like a frightened child being told that her parents were going to give her away or sell her. "Please…"

Miroku pursed his lips, his jaw clenched down firmly. "I am very sorry. My wife and I cannot stand between you and Sesshomaru. You must understand…" he looked back at his sons donning their gear: Tisoki with the sickle that had been Kohaku's chosen tool once upon a time, and Kohimu with the bow and arrow. Kasai was huddled with Masuyo, smiling and making faces at her little brother to keep him from worrying.

Rin's shoulders shook, but she nodded. "I understand…" she swallowed nervously and rose slowly to her feet. Tsukiyume did the same, acting as a crutch for Rin.

More screams erupted from outside, now the voices had an audible word that they were repeating, "_Demon! Demon!"_

Hearing it, Rin felt dizzy, weak. She pulled away from Tsukiyume and grabbed Miroku's arm instead. "Please, my sword. Please…"

The monk raised his eyebrows at her incredulously. "You intend to kill Sesshomaru, Lady Rin?"

Rin closed her eyes and shook her head, but in truth she was lost, the word was a haze, a fog. She was unable to walk through it, unable to see beyond it. Fear twisted her world. The power and weight of the sword in her palm would steady her, give her clarity. At least that was what she told herself.

The baby inside her seemed to be doing cartwheels, moving and swimming frantically, as if trying to communicate with her, or sharing in her mood somehow.

Miroku nodded and moved away from her, back to the corner with their things. He dug through the bags, searching for Rin's blades. There were still several inside the saddlebags, but there was one—Hikitsuru—that he recognized. He picked it up and crossed the room to her again, holding it out to her. As it entered Rin's hands the weight was too much, it slipped out of her fingers and clattered onto the floor. She whimpered pathetically with despair.

A loud, crackling sound came from right outside their room. Through the screened windows, as they turned to look, they saw a neon green glow rising. It whirled in a long, glowing line. A whip.

Rin collapsed onto the floor, quivering like jelly. She fumbled for the sword. "He'll kill me…"

Tsukiyume hovered next to her, gripping her arm. "He won't kill you, Rin. He won't. You have to stop him—only you can do it! _Please…_he'll kill everyone else until he finds you, until you go with him!" the hanyou girl started to cry, then to outright sob. Rin stared at the other girl confusedly, as if she'd never seen her before. "You have to make him spare shishi-sama!"

Rin's hands closed over Hikitsuru. "Shishi-sama…" the baby fluttered inside her belly, as if calling out to its father. Rin felt her face burning. _Everything I am…it's impossible to get away from him. Impossible. Even when I was a little girl, Death itself couldn't keep him away…_

And she knew it was true, suddenly, deception or not, with his wicked power or even the threat of bloodlust or madness, Sesshomaru and she were bound together. The child kicked in her womb, eager to meet her father.

Someone screamed outside, nearby, in the courtyard. Sesshomaru had tracked Rin to this inn, but amidst so many humans finding her was like picking a single ant from the ant nest. Wood splintered somewhere as Sesshomaru burst into a room, using his whip. A woman screamed wildly in fear.

"We can't let this go on anymore." Miroku announced, gritting his teeth. Sango moved with him and together they slid open the screen door and rushed out as one into the courtyard. Rin stared out through the doorway and saw the flash of neon green, her mate at war, in bloodlust.

"Tsukiyume, you're free." She told the hanyou girl, "Go back to your brother. Thank him for me, apologize too." Rin shuddered, closing her eyes, and pushed herself upright at last.

* * *

Kohimu and Tisoki were just outside the door now, staring at the source of the disturbance with huge, terrified eyes. Partly their shock stemmed from this demon's appearance—they were accustomed to dealing with insect youkai and petty human criminals. This was a greater youkai, and undeniably he looked like Inuyasha. Another aspect of their awe was that their parents had willingly chosen to engage the demon, dragging his attention away from searching the rooms of the inn for Rin.

* * *

Sesshomaru regarded the mortals that had come to threaten him and—to his surprise—found them mildly familiar. At some point he'd run across them. The man was dressed in the robes of a monk; the woman was in the tight fitting suit of a demon slayer, complete with armor. They were swift-footed, in good shape for humans. 

The woman hauled a large curved bone and let it fly at him. Again Sesshomaru found that this attack struck a memory. As it wheeled toward him, he sidestepped, faster than the mortals would be able to see, and allowed the bone to fly beyond him. But it was a boomerang; it would return and try to cut him down on its way back. Sesshomaru listened to the thing cut its way through the air, and as it neared, he turned and snatched the weapon out of the air with his single hand. He let it drop to the ground.

The monk had slipped one hand out of his robes and dropped to one knee. He held a bow, large and powerful, and over one shoulder was a quiver full of large, intimidating arrows. This was a men's bow, made for bringing down large, powerful animals, perhaps even horses in battle. The monk took aim and fired.

His aim was good, if the arrow had hit, it would've been in Sesshomaru's neck. But, as he had with the woman's bone boomerang, Sesshomaru stepped aside, letting the arrow whiz past him. As the monk reached over his shoulder for another arrow, Sesshomaru lunged forward, crossing the thirty or so feet between himself and these puny humans in a fraction of a second.

Sesshomaru pushed the woman backwards as she drew a sword, knocking her roughly to the ground. The monk forced down and then snatched the bow away from him, tossing it carelessly aside. The monk also carried a staff. He reached for it as he fell, pulling it up and bringing it to keep Sesshomaru at a distance.

Sesshomaru leapt backward deftly, a multicolored blur. Rin's scent was near, so close. Was she hiding?

He spotted two boys, dressed like the woman in the regalia of a demon slayer. One held a sickle, the other a smaller, slimmer bow. Were they keeping Rin inside that room?

Confidently, Sesshomaru took a step forward, his feet crushing the rich mossy grass of the courtyard, and then paused, hearing the whirring of a flying projectile. He whirled away, ducking, and stuck out his hand, snatching the weapon out of the air again. This time it was a small throwing knife, a dagger. Sesshomaru glanced over his shoulder and saw that the woman was back on her feet, a fierce, determined snarl set over her features.

Sesshomaru dropped the knife to the ground and lowered his arm, letting his energies flow and twist and change. The green glow of the whip started to extende out from his fingers.

"Hey!" one of the boys shouted, and when Sesshomaru turned to look back, the boy with the sickle had let it fly.

Without thinking, Sesshomaru moved away from the weapon, just as the second boy with the bow let an arrow loose. The double-attack was a microsecond too quick for Sesshomaru to evade. The small arrow glanced the armor on Sesshomaru's stomach and bounced off harmlessly.

_Wasting my time._ Sesshomaru thought angrily. He turned from the boys and saw that both the woman and the monk had recovered their weapons—without moving from their spots. How they'd managed that became apparent when Sesshomaru felt a puff of air near his legs, and sensed a kitsune aura…

He struck like a snake, lunging, and caught the ankle of the kitsune—only a boy. The child cried out, alarmed, and then vanished, leaving only dust inside Sesshomaru's hand.

Frustrated, Sesshomaru growled low, deep in his chest, and began moving swiftly toward the two demon slayer boys again. The monk and the woman cried out. The boomerang took off again, but Sesshomaru tracked it by ear, and as it came toward him, he let his own weapon fly, snapping the whip at the flying bone. It splintered; breaking into several pieces, and fell harmlessly onto the grass.

Another of the heavier men's arrows whizzed through the air. Sesshomaru continued on his path but at a faster pace, evading the arrow.

The woman shouted to the boys. "Run! Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai!" her voice was shrill and panicked. She was their mother, Sesshomaru realized dimly.

The boys should've run from him, but instead they retreated from him into the room. Sesshomaru moved swiftly after them. Rin's scent rose higher and higher. Yes, it was _this _room…

* * *

Tsukiyume had retreated, leaving Rin on one side of the room, and she'd picked up Masuyo and taken the little girl Kasai by the hand. She hid crouched in one corner with them, trying to protect them. 

Kohimu and Tisoki rushed through, panting, their faces white with fear. "Holy shit that guy's fast!" Kohimu was shouting.

"Who is he?" Tisoki demanded, seemingly of the air.

Rin was on her feet now. "He's Sesshomaru." She answered quietly, crossing the room to be directly before the door. Her shoulders were shaking. "Tsukiyume, take the boys."

Tsukiyume called out to them, "Kohimu, Tisoki, come here, don't move…"

The boys moved over beside her and their younger brother and sister, kneeling and catching their breath quietly. A green glow approached the door; they trailed it with their eyes through the other screens of the wall.

* * *

Sesshomaru was within five feet of the doorway when Rin appeared within it, her body shaking, her eyes lowered, and Hikitsuru, the most powerful of the blades he'd had forged for her, clasped in both of her hands. He halted, both with amazement and with caution. Rin's form had changed completely from the last time he'd seen her. She had hardened; he could see it even through her physical shaking. Her abdomen had swelled with pregnancy; even through her abundant robes he could see that. 

From inside the room Sesshomaru could hear and scent youngsters—a human baby, a girl, the demon slayer boys and Tsukiyume. Behind him the kitsune, the monk, and the demon slayer woman had paused, watching the interaction, waiting. They were involved with Rin then, they understood that he had come for her…

"Rin." He addressed her and then swallowed gently, trying to cover the deep, scratchy tone that had emerged. "Come with me."

Her knees were shaking, and slowly, she lowered herself into a sitting position. "No." she whispered.

Sesshomaru's jaw squared tightly. She was not a child any longer. Holding her with one arm would be very hard, especially when she was heavily pregnant as she was. Physically it would be difficult to force her to come, but accepting her answer was simply impossible. As if he hadn't heard her, he repeated himself. "Rin, come with me."

Rin lifted Hikitsuru and unsheathed it, holding it carefully in her lap. "I'll come with you," she murmured shakily, "If you promise me that you won't kill anyone here and—" she stammered, "Inuyasha. No one from his family. And Shimofuri…"

Anger made Sesshomaru's face warm up, made his fingers, and the long neon green whip extending from them, twitch. "Shimofuri must pay."

Rin closed her eyes, drawing a deep breath. "No!" her hands shook as she fumbled with Hikitsuru in her lap. She held it vertical now, resting the tip on her chin. The blade was powerful; one break of the skin and it could kill her.

Sesshomaru moved to step forward, his face creasing openly now with rage and—fear. "Rin." His voice was croaking to his shame.

"Promise me that all of them will be safe from you." Rin had closed her eyes; her hands were poised over the blade. Her heart was pounding in her ears, sweat beaded between her breasts. The child danced on her bladder.

"Lower the blade and it will be done." He told her, half-growling.

Rin lifted her chin and moved the sword away. She blinked and a few tears flew away from her eyes, she let them come. "Promise me."

Sesshomaru was stiff. "I promise."

Uncertainly, Rin sheathed Hikitsuru and pushed herself clear of the floor. Without turning to look at her, she called to the hanyou girl, "Tsukiyume, the things in my saddlebags are yours. Do with them as you like."

Inside the room with the children, Tsukiyume closed her eyes tightly, fighting a sudden surge of tears. "Thank you, Lady Rin." This ending was both tragic and a bit of a blessing. Now Shimofuri was safe but Tsukiyume had had nothing really to do with it. She wouldn't need to manipulate Rin any further, or turn her over to Sesshomaru. She watched as Rin stepped shakily away from the little room and disappeared into the courtyard.

* * *

The end for now...more later of course... :-) Drop me a line if you like the idea of **Innocence**that I mentioned above. Thank you! 


	25. The Insen

A/N: Inuyasha and Sesshomaru are terrible communicators. It must run in the family. How can Sesshomaru bring Rin from her embittered, troubled state of being? Also, thanks guys for giving me a great kick in your reviews. Almost everyone answered my question regarding _Innocence_ and almost all of you liked it. (And Simonkal, I do have to agree with your point, it is sad, but I just can't resist the fun I could have with it.) And so many of you saw my ending note of "the end" and thought I was done! Oh my! I'm sorry for the horror that caused. Wow, I'm laughing all over again. Sorry about that. Ahem…

Disclaimer: Nope I only own Miroku and Sango's kids, Inuyasha's and Kagome's.

* * *

Last chapter: Sesshomaru returned Koinu unharmed. Inuyasha told him where Rin was. When Kagome came home he shouted at her because he was still consumed with terror over losing one of their babies. Miroku and Sango dealt with their family banter. Sesshomaru spoiled the party. Rin made him promise not to harm anyone, Shimofuri included. She set Tsukiyume free and left with Sesshomaru.

* * *

**The Insen**

Leaving the courtyard and the inn and the small town was a blur to Rin, but as soon as she came out of the fog, she felt vertigo steal over her. The sweetness of the night air rushing over her face and through her hair, the twinkling of starlight overhead, and the sway of the grasses and trees alongside the path—they were all things that reminded her heavily of her childhood. Of the years spent walking behind Sesshomaru, picking flowers and weaving them into crowns and offering them to Jaken.

When he'd left her at Jouka to be educated she'd grown into more of a woman than a girl. She'd budded breasts, and sprouted several inches in height. For a long time she longed for nothing else but to rejoin Sesshomaru, to follow him through the forests again as she had as a girl.

Ironically, it seemed that the higher powers had listened to her desires, and they had an interesting sense of humor. They'd fulfilled her wish, but now she didn't wish to be here, not at all. In fact, she didn't wish to be anywhere.

Sesshomaru kept a steady pace several body lengths ahead of her. Rin occasionally lifted her gaze to admire his backsides, to see the glint of his armor and the ruffle of the white fluff on his shoulder. Since leaving the village they hadn't exchanged any words. As a child that had been a normal occurrence, as an adult, his mate and lover, it was a little more unusual.

Considering the situation, and her own feelings, she didn't want him to try and speak to her.

They ascended a hill, Sesshomaru climbed it effortlessly, Rin struggled for every step. At the top she stopped, sitting on the side of the path, breathing hard and with one hand wrapped around her protruding belly. Sesshomaru traveled fast, he often moved ahead of her and Jaken when she'd been a child. Traveling with Tsukiyume and with the demon slayers had been simple in comparison.

Sesshomaru continued walking ahead, seemingly unaware that she'd stopped. Rin returned the favor and ignored him, focusing instead on her own body. She breathed carefully and tried to calm her nerves, to bury her anxiety and tension. The baby sensed these emotions she was sure, her daughter hadn't stopped moving all night.

She rubbed her belly, closing her eyes and trying to calm the baby in her womb. The wind sprang up again, making her sigh as she relaxed with it. But when she opened her eyes she saw that it had concealed the sounds of Sesshomaru's return. His narrow, booted feet stood before her on the path, a few short feet away. She followed them up, past the hakama, over the armor protecting his stomach and chest, and finally to his face.

His golden eyes were distant and cold as he stared down at her. The firmness of his jaw told Rin that he was angry. "The child is fine."

Rin sneered bitterly, "That's easy for you to say."

Surprisingly he answered her words, though it was with a new topic. "You have spent too long with my brother."

He was calling her vulgar or rude. She had neglected to offer him any respect when he told her that their child was fine. Her words were direct, she'd used no titles, and she'd challenged his pronouncement. Apparently Sesshomaru expected her to treat him cold and distantly, not with open dislike or disdain.

She wondered how he'd found out, if he'd decided to check for himself and scented her there, or if some rumor had slipped, if Shimofuri had already given her away…

"You can walk?" he asked, coldly. He wasn't looking at her directly any longer.

"I can." She answered, sighing.

Without another word, Sesshomaru turned his back on her and began moving away again. After a long, heavy breath inward, Rin heaved her heavier than usual body up from the ground and followed behind him. Except for her more elevated height, and the child moving excitedly inside her, it was exactly like her girlhood.

The hours passed. Emotion came and went, but mostly the walking cleared her mind and her thoughts by draining her of energy. Occasionally Rin would look up and see her mate's backsides and have a moment of fear, or pain. Had she really rejoined the creature that she'd given herself to so loyally, so blindly?

At the same time, his otherworldliness struck her anew. As a child she had noticed it when she'd first met him, but her innocence and curiosity had drawn her to him, overwhelming the strangeness that separated them. But in the awkwardness between them now, Rin was able to remove herself and observe Sesshomaru with the eyes of a distant intimate, like an objective scientist that had spent her life studying a creature to discover some innate secret.

Sesshomaru was as distant as the sun to her, but at the same time so powerful and so intimate that, like sunlight, she could still feel his warmth. What thoughts were passing through his mind? She'd always fancied herself as an expert, able to read him like no other, but was that really true? She'd been he last to know of his wife, tucked away in the Isei…

Near dawn Rin had become a zombie, barely thinking, and unquestionably unfeeling. She followed Sesshomaru like a beast of burden, as if she'd never known anything else in her life, ever. They reached a small village, nestled in a valley between some sharply peaked mountains, the first range that climbed after the relatively flat lands near the coast.

Sesshomaru halted now at long last and summoned her to his side. In his single, long, elegant arm, the inuyoukai held out a few coins to her. "You must sleep."

Rin took them without comment and without staring into his face. He wouldn't share a room with her—that would, of course, draw too much attention—but she was certain he wouldn't be far away either. He would never let her out of sight now.

The innkeeper was cranky when he was woken before his usual time, but the money pacified him swiftly. Most people paid him not with actual currency, but with work or with rice or some other good. Actual gold was a rare, delightful treat. He showed Rin to a room on the first floor after he woke one guest and switched the rooms around. He was concerned over Rin's condition; he didn't want her climbing any stairs.

Alone, Rin crawled exhaustedly into the sleeping mats that the innkeeper provided, and fell at once into a deep, dreamless sleep. (A/N: in a short time as I write this, I plan on doing just the same thing and enjoying it very thoroughly.)

* * *

Akisame and Koinu sat quietly at the table, pencils in their hands, the English alphabet sitting in front of them. Akisame, a little older than two years old, was abruptly beginning to inherit the youkai's dexterity that seemed to pass through Inuyasha into their children. Koinu was already masterful, more so than any of Miroku and Sango's children, and better than his mother had been at a similar age. 

Kagome's gaze was solemn and unfocused as she waited for her children to finish copying the lesson. The room was unusually quiet with Sango and Miroku's brood gone along with Tsukiyume and Rin. She came out of her reverie briefly to watch her son, scrutinizing his young, innocent face.

Koinu's face was bruised lightly still from his encounter with his uncle. His lips and nose had bled where he'd struggled, smashing his little features against Sesshomaru's powerful hand. His eyes were still puffy from the tears he'd cried. Akisame, in comparison, was already healthy and happy again. Her mind remained young and childish; she wouldn't remember the attack in a year.

Koinu, however, would probably carry it with him for the rest of his life. The physical marks would vanish, but the emotional ones…

The boy's sense of smell was powerful enough that he'd known from almost the moment the attack began that the creature holding him was in fact his blood uncle, his father's infamous older brother. In his innocent world, there had never been a foe that was within the bloodline, inside the family. It was a bombardment to him of the natural order.

Kagome had only made the problem worse when she tried to explain the difference between hanyou and youkai. Koinu understood it by scent, but failed to see how it manipulated things in the adult mind. Now he'd begun believing that _youkai_ and the blood and power associated with it were given to violence. He stared at his own father with new eyes, worrying.

Sighing, Kagome reached forward and tapped her children's hands. "I think that's enough of a lesson today, don't you?" when they looked up at her, she smiled, trying to encourage them.

Akisame grinned back at her and tossed the pencil away. "Dumb." She announced, giggling.

Koinu set his own pencil down slowly, with the reserve of a true student. There were many times that Kagome saw herself in her son, in spite of the fact that he was almost the mirror image of his father. "Mama?" he asked.

"Yes, Koinu?" she leaned forward and stroked his ear, but the pup tucked it against the side of his head and frowned disapprovingly.

"Can we go see Grandma? And Uncle Souta? And Great Grandpa?"

Kagome nodded, smiling. "Of course we can, if it will make you smile."

Koinu nodded and his face brightened. "Do you think Uncle Souta will let me play his video game?"

Akisame clapped her hands together and laughed, "Dumb!" she announced a second time.

"I'm sure he will, he loves you very much, Koinu—and so do I, so does your father." She reached for his hair and ears again and he growled, ducking and complaining loudly.

"Mom! Cut it out! You're as bad as stupid Kasai!"

Kagome quirked her head to one side, smirking. "As bad as Kasai?"

The boy nodded, frowning. "She's always touching my ears!" the offended appendages flattened themselves on his head, as if embarrassed to be the center of attention so suddenly.

"Well Koinu, I must say I understand where she's coming from." She grinned with real mirth and reached out, trying to tease her son's ears into an upright position. "You and your father have irresistible ears."

Koinu pulled his head away from her, still scowling fiercely. "Mom! Stop!"

Kagome lifted her hands into the air in surrender. "Okay, I'm sorry." She paused, still smirking, before she turned the conversation back on its previous track. "When do you want to go see Uncle Souta?"

"How about now?" Koinu asked, raising his eyebrows hopefully and clapping his hands together in a pleading gesture, begging his mother.

"Hmm." Kagome put her fingers to her chin, pretending to consider it with doubt. "How about I let you and Aki stay with Grandma and Uncle Souta for tonight."

Koinu mimicked her earlier motion by cocking his head at an angle, inquisitively. "You mean without you? Where would you go, mama?"

"I'd stay here with your father. He needs some cheering up." Her smile had grown tenser now, darker, though she tried to hide that change from her son.

Inuyasha was still haunted by the encounter with his brother, with Koinu's near-miss. He had been distant, even evasive around her the entire day. Kagome was certain it was nothing too serious, in his own time Inuyasha would overcome his brooding, he would forgive her. That was the real issue, he hadn't forgiven her. Kagome thought she knew just how to melt the ice between them, and leaving their children in the safety of her mother's care would make her task that much easier.

It'd been too long since she'd been able to sit with her hanyou, to speak to him without the worry of underage ears or ever-curious adult eavesdroppers.

Koinu's expression darkened with mixed emotions, uncertainty, and doubt. "Is daddy okay?" his blue eyes searched Kagome's face, worriedly.

Akisame squealed happily, making Koinu and Kagome cringe at the sheer volume of it. The toddler grasped her pencil and the paper she'd been writing on before and began coloring furiously. Her pink tongue stuck out from one side of her lips as she worked. Circles, lines, and curves emerged from her scribbles, forming a loose, humanoid shape.

"Daddy's fine." Kagome answered, smiling encouragingly. "He just needs a little time, and a little talking."

"I can help!" Koinu offered, eagerly.

"Thank you, Koinu, but it's something between your daddy and me." Kagome rose to her feet, and moved around the table to wrap her arms around Koinu and nuzzle him. The boy grunted at first, resisting, then melted reluctantly into her embrace.

When Kagome reached to include Akisame in their little huddle, the toddler growled like a dog and swatted her mother's hands away. She was focused on her drawing with a one track mind. Kagome let her go for a moment in favor of kissing Koinu on top of the head and stroking his hair, his ears.

"I love you, honey, don't you ever forget it." the boy squirmed a little, snuggling into her.

Over the top of her son's head, Kagome at last noticed what it was her daughter was working so steadfastly on drawing. The humanoid shape had emerged on her page with remarkable detail and anatomical accuracy. A creature with spiky armor on one side, flowing hair that she didn't color in—meaning it was light—and only one arm.

As she watched, Akisame paused in her drawing, lifting the pencil and staring down at her work with her golden eyes narrowed fiercely in concentration. Then, slowly, with determination, she drew two lines on the creature's face, below his eyes.

Kagome reached out with one hand and snatched the paper away from Akisame, crumpling it at once. Akisame gaped at her mother for a moment, still holding the pencil, now motionless and useless. Then her face transformed into a snarl, "Mama!"

Before Kagome could speak, Koinu did it for her. "Don't draw that, Aki. It's bad stuff." Kagome felt her son's little claws grip her forearm, and then warm wet drops touched her arm as he burrowed his head against her.

Fresh tears sprang into Kagome's eyes, but she blinked them away hurriedly. Folding her arms tightly around Koinu, she hummed, trying to comfort him. "It's okay, Koinu, it's okay…" she closed her eyes, still fighting the tears. _I won't let it happen again, I promise…_

Akisame watched the exchange with a darkening expression at first, and then her face broke, trembling. She whimpered and crawled to her mother and her brother, touching them and mumbling. Kagome included her in their embrace, holding her close.

"It's okay…shhh…" _Inuyasha, I'm so sorry, you were right…_

* * *

An unseen, unfelt instinct woke Rin from her sleep. She blinked blearily, seeing the empty, gray room around her. The screens over the windows were stained gray with soot from braziers and lamps. Light filtered through them strangely, making the air look thick and slimy. 

She had to pee very badly. Rin groaned weakly and ran a hand over her face, sniffling through a stuffy nose, clogged with dirt from the long walk the day before and through the night. The room she'd woken in wasn't Inuyasha's guest room, so she knew the night walk behind Sesshomaru wasn't just another tormenting dream.

"Rin."

She sat up too fast, blood rushed out of her head, leaving her dizzy. For a moment she saw double in the room, and then she made out Sesshomaru's slim, elegant body sitting near the door. He was seated so that she could only really see his profile, the fine outline of his lips, his nose, and the shine of his eyes as he stared blankly ahead.

She knew better than to ask him how he'd gotten in. He was _Sesshomaru,_ he could do almost anything. Rin breathed deeply, trying to settle her heart. "Yes?" she answered shakily.

"Prepare yourself. We must leave."

Her limbs felt like lead weights, but Rin pulled herself from the sleeping matt anyway. Her robe was rumpled from sleep and the bottom hem was stained from dirt and dust. It was a bland kimono anyway, luckily. She started to move toward the door, but paused awkwardly when she realized she wouldn't be able to pass easily beyond Sesshomaru.

She sighed tiredly. "I have to use the privy."

Sesshomaru didn't lift his eyes to meet hers when he replied. "There is a pan. You do not need to leave this room."

When she turned to look he was right, there was a pan in one corner, meant as a bedpan. The thought of using it made Rin's skin crawl; she much preferred the privacy away from Sesshomaru's eye in which to relieve her bladder. The privy afforded privacy, the pot didn't. Here she would have to squat and maneuver her kimono, hiking it up. It was debatable whether Sesshomaru would turn away, or if he would watch her unfailingly, almost as if he was punishing her with his gaze.

Blearily, she tried asking, "What about water to wash my face?"

"You will have no bath this day." he responded, dryly. For the first time, he met her gaze with his own, and Rin caught the down turn of his lips, the angry quirk of muscles in his jaw, and the slight narrowing of his eyes. He was angry…

Two could play that game. Rin's fists clenched up into little, furious balls. "Is the great Lord Sesshomaru frightened that this meek, thoughtless Rin will run away from him again if he takes his eyes from her?"

His jaw tightened, clenching. "You will not leave this room." He was seated so that his only arm faced the doorway, meaning that he could, and likely would, reach out to stop her if she tried to pass.

Resolutely, Rin stepped forward, staring straight ahead. She moved for the door, pressing her body close to the thin walls to slip past the quietly enraged ruler of the Western Lands. Sesshomaru followed her with his eyes, narrowed and predatory. As she slipped just past him, his single arm lashed out and strong, narrow fingers wrapped themselves nimbly around her ankle. Rin pulled and stumbled, falling against the wall with a small cry. Sesshomaru was on his feet before she could fall. Somehow, in microseconds, he inuyoukai was able to use his single arm to manipulate Rin's weight. Her body collided with his chest and stomach, taking her weight and shielding her.

He grunted slightly, and then as Rin blinked, regaining her balance, Sesshomaru's grip tightened wrenchingly. "We leave now."

Rin pushed at him, but her human body was frail, pathetic. "No—"

The long, brilliantly white sleeves of Sesshomaru's haori (A/N: is Sesshy's technically a haori? It seems to be, he has hakama too I think.) closed over her vision. Rin panicked, breathing roughly. Sesshomaru's grip on her, in spite of having only one arm to do it with, was strong. It swept her along like the current of a river, like the force of a wind in a gale.

Rin had experienced Sesshomaru's power on many occasions, often intimately, but never before had it been when he was this angry with her, when they had been apart for so long and on such bad terms. Sesshomaru was anything but human. There were moments when she was reminded of this fact, and it tried to swallow her up and overwhelm her. Fear surged through her then and she cried out, clawing at the whiteness, at the force of his hold on her, pressing her into him.

The whiteness wasn't withdrawn from her for uncountable seconds. Rin felt her body becoming almost weightless, then it tingled she was nearly overcome with dizziness.

Gravity reinserted itself abruptly. Sesshomaru released her and Rin fell forward like a sack of grains. His clawed hand caught her, keeping her roughly upright. Rin forced her knees underneath her, but they shook. Her eyes adjusted to the world around her, making her feel dizzied all over again as she saw forest around her now, not the gray walls of the shabby little inn.

"What…" she stammered, trying to speak and breathe at once, unsuccessfully.

Sesshomaru let her slip into the dust heavily, then he stepped forward, as if about to walk away and leave her behind.

"What did you just do?" Rin gasped, holding her head in her hands. There were ants in the dirt around her, scurrying frantically around her feet. They were in a hurry, flustered and panicked.

"I have brought you to the edge of the Western Lands." He replied with his back still facing her.

Rin shifted, kneeling and holding her stomach. She fought nausea as her body calmed. Sesshomaru had never transported her in such a way. They'd covered many miles, a day or two of endless walking in the space of a few breaths. Rin couldn't fathom the capacity of it, the magnitude, or the simple _how._ Her body reacted the same way as her mind—it wasn't a natural way for her to travel as a mere mortal.

A tremor made Rin gasp, clutching at her belly and the child inside her. Pain streaked over and through her abdomen, the muscles seized up in a spasm.

Ahead of her, Sesshomaru turned slightly, watching her silently with one eye.

The pain faded as suddenly as it'd come, leaving Rin sweating and panting. The ants around her in the dirt, darting about, blurred as she fought tears. _The baby…_it was still too soon. If she went into premature labor the child couldn't survive yet—_and she'd been so close!_

"You are in pain?" Sesshomaru asked, coldly.

Rin choked, caught between tears and rage. "It's too soon still!" she half-sobbed, her hands were spread over her belly, fingers splayed widely, as if she could catch the child, as if it were trying to leap out of her bellybutton.

Sesshomaru made one short, sniffing sound, as if surprised, but when he spoke it was removed and in a very bland tone. "You need not worry…"

Hearing this, Rin's face twisted with a snarl. _"You_ wouldn't worry, would you?" she laughed bitterly at the ground. "Lord Sesshomaru despises hanyou." She lifted her gaze, staring fixedly on the single point of color she could see from his golden eyes. "Even his own child. And Lord Sesshomaru has a wife with an heir-to-be. Lord Sesshomaru feels nothing…"

He pivoted on one foot, turning with the simple motion to face her. His lips narrowed, his eyes glowered down at her. This was an expression almost worthy of his most-expressive brother, Inuyasha. It was a full-fledged glare, yet tinting it, hidden in the set of his chin or the crease of his forehead, or around his eyes or his mouth, was pain.

"Do not think…" he began, strongly, in a deeper voice than usual, rumbling with power—but the words died, drying up. Then his face flickered, emptying like water out of a crack in the bottom of a bowl. "I will not discuss this with you."

"But you can't stop me from saying it!" Rin hissed, thickly but under her breath. "Or would you kill me to stop it?"

Sesshomaru was unaffected, cold. "You will not discuss it." he told her, firmly.

"Lord Sesshomaru may be the Lord of the Western Lands, but he cannot control Rin." She pushed herself to her feet, wincing slightly as the dirt and rocks on the ground bit into her feet. Sesshomaru ad transported her alone, without her shoes. "I showed you that when I left you." she snarled.

"For your daughter." Sesshomaru lifted his head slightly, and Rin saw a small glow of triumph inside his gaze, "You must not upset yourself."

Rin stopped, realizing with a jolt that he was right. One hand was still over her belly, stabilizing her as she moved. The child squirmed inside her, tapping on her bladder. Her muscles continued to spurt, wrenching up with pain and then relaxing just as fast. Rin was weak suddenly as she tried to empty out the emotion roiling inside her.

Sesshomaru was watching her, keenly, having already anticipated her reaction. When she was quiet for some time, he turned his back on her, and began slowly walking. Eventually, though they were unsteady and uneven, Sesshomaru heard Rin's tread behind him, following. He buried his own anger, tucking it away like a dog might with a juicy bone. Rin's body was beginning to make practice runs, tensing the muscles of the abdomen in preparation for labor and birth. Stressing her was unwise, and he would avoid it as much as possible. He would cut days off their travel time, he would accommodate her in villages to let her get the highest quality of sleep they could manage while traveling…he would maintain the tense, unsettled quiet between them.

For the child, for now…

* * *

"What do you think will happen to her?" Shippo asked the hanyou girl, quietly. 

They were on the trail again, walking steadily up a large hill, the first in a series of low-rising foothills that marked the end of the coastal plains near the coastline. The harshness of the inland awaited them. Miroku and Sango traveled with the packhorse Roba, now abandoned by her original owner. Saddlebags covered her sides, forgotten and given up by Rin. Sango carried Masuyo, shielding him from the sun with her hands. Over her own head she'd used her purple wrap skirt, leaving only her pinkish kimono. She gripped the mare with her thighs, showing the very rare expanse of muscular leg beyond the loosened hem of her kimono. Miroku guided the mare by the harness on one side. His staff jangled against his shoulder.

Their children were running about energetically, ahead of the others on the path. Weapons of one kind or another were strapped onto all of them, giving them quick protection if they should be ambushed suddenly from the brush alongside the path.

Tsukiyume sighed, staring at the ground. "I couldn't say, Shippo."

The kitsune took quick notice of Tsukiyume's dark, subdued mood, and cheerily added, "You get to see your brother again, Tsuki! And he's safe from Sesshomaru. Aren't you happy?"

"I am." Tsukiyume murmured, frowningly. "But I feel like it just can't be true. Something will go wrong and…"

"But Rin will keep him safe." Shippo told her, encouragingly.

"Rin is maddened by grief." Tsukiyume responded, letting a bitter note creep into her voice.

It was Shippo's turn now to scowl. "Tsuki?"

The hanyou girl's white ears flattened against the thick black mat of her hair. Her eyes grew shiny with unshed tears. "I just don't know…I keep thinking something horrible will happen, Shippo."

The kit shook his head perplexedly. "Like what?"

Tsukiyume looked to the sky, sighing. "Like Rin will die and Sesshomaru will come after all of us."

For a time Shippo was silent, contemplating her words thoughtfully. His face was creased with doubt, worry. But the moment passed and Shippo grinned confidently. "No, Rin won't die. She's too strong—too fierce. She should've been born as an inuyoukai woman." He laughed and nudged Tsukiyume with his shoulder playfully, "She wouldn't make a good fox though, no sir. A good inuyoukai, a horrible kitsune. Too serious." He moved into Tsukiyume's face, screwing up his lip into a facsimile of a frown, mimicking the serious faces that he'd seen the various adults wear in his lifetime.

Tsukiyume offered him a weak, half-hearted smile and then, cautiously, slipped her hand into his, seeking comfort. Shippo grinned at her cheerfully, squeezing her hand back and happily leading her down the path.

Behind them, Miroku smiled faintly and glanced back at his wife on the horse. He released the harness and brushed her thigh with his palm, signaling her attention. Sango turned her head toward him, letting him see beyond the shadow and the obstruction of the wrap skirt she was using as a shield from the sunlight. Masuyo was tucked in close to her, also sheltered from the sun. The baby was nodding off, his eyes drooping heavily.

Miroku pointed to Shippo and Tsukiyume ahead of them. "What do you think is going on there, hmm?"

Tsukiyume was taller than Shippo, and lankier, but it seemed that kitsune were never destined to be enormous in their bipedal forms. Shippo was, physically, out of boyhood and into adolescence. Tsukiyume was probably comparatively older, but not outside, age-wise of a feasible romance.

Sango shook her head and moved her thigh out of Miroku's grasp. "You pervert." But she was smiling amusedly at him. Love lit her face, brightening her eyes.

"My Sango, wife, you wound me!" he grinned up at her, laughing.

* * *

The closest castle to the border with the Middle Lands was the Insen, but the journey to it was at the same time the hardest. The climb was steep and treacherous for a mortal, heavily pregnant woman. To make matters even worse, the weather had changed since they'd begun traveling. The warm, humid heat had waned into pummeling seasonal rains. Heavy rain clouds brooded overhead for several days, pouring out their contents on the miserable Rin and the cold-hearted Sesshomaru. 

As was normal for him, Sesshomaru didn't stop their walk just for a little rain, no matter how hard it poured. Somewhere in the distance, his far-reaching senses told him the rains were brought as a sign of the first typhoons. They had arrived in Japan as they did every year in high summer. But this year things felt earlier, grittier, harsher. The setting was ripe for a disaster.

When the rains had begun, Sesshomaru had provided Rin with money and, at the first village they came across, they stopped and acquired thicker clothes, shoes, and a very large, rounded hat. It wasn't anything more than a sunhat, and its weave was of poor quality. Within an hour, Rin's new hat was leaking. Raindrops soaked through and dibbled onto her head.

Miserable and soaked to the bone, Rin shivered but marched on like a soldier, bound for war. At the end of the first day, inside yet another inn that Sesshomaru had picked out and paid for, Rin tossed aside all of her disheveled, wet and wrinkled clothes and slept naked on the sleeping mat, beneath a pile of thick blankets.

She woke fitfully in the night, her abdomen convulsing with a powerful, gut-wrenching pain. She whimpered, gritting her teeth. The screens over the windows allowed a thick, milky gray moonlight to fall inside the room. The scene blurred before Rin's eyes as tears sprang unbidden into her eyes, brought on by the pain. The tinkling, dripping sound of the rain also faded away, forced out by the pain.

And then, as suddenly as it had been there, it was gone. Rin was left shivering beneath the blankets, holding herself as if she were a child again.

As she struggled to calm her breathing and wiped at the cold sweat that had beaded on her forehead, she became aware of a change in the room. The light passed through the windows in the same way that it had moments before, and the rain was still pattering outside on the eaves, spilling in droves onto the ground. Yet, nevertheless, Rin felt the change, like a whisper of air over her cheeks, like the puff of warmth and moisture from another person's breath in her face.

Sesshomaru had entered the room. As a youkai there were things about him that Rin feared over and over, in spite of herself. One of these traits was his way of coming and going like a phantom, or a ghost. None of the hanyou Rin had known in her lifetime had been able to do the same thing, so it must've been a trait that was lost the moment human blood was added to the mix. It was a comforting thought—Rin didn't like the idea of her own child flitting about like a spirit.

"Why are you here?" she demanded, frowning when she heard the quiver in her voice.

"Dress." He ordered her, stiffly.

"Why?" she twisted her head on the sleeping mat, halfway trying to see him, though she knew she couldn't, he was near the door, she wasn't facing it.

"We must reach the Insen."

There were still days of walking as far as Rin was concerned. She sighed and closed her eyes, pressing the palm of one hand into her face. "In the rain? In the middle of the night?"

"Dress." Sesshomaru repeated, blandly but with firmness.

Rin gave in and pulled herself up from the sleeping mat, dragging the heap of blankets with her. She turned to stare into the darkness of the room near the door, searching for her mate. Sesshomaru was standing in the corner, stiffly. He stood out against the darkness in his immaculate, white, red, and blue hakama and haori. The armor looked, casting strange shadows, making him look other worldly, something spawned from the depths of the earth, or from time.

Chilled all over again, Rin pulled herself to where she'd laid out her clothes. It was a thin, coarse light blue kimono with some gray peasant pants and flimsy sandals. Rin's face twisted with effort and frustration as she pulled on each article of clothing while struggling to keep the blankets around her shoulders to maintain her dignity. The clothes were freezing and still damp. Rin felt the energy leaking out of her as the wetness of the clothes coated her skin, making it clammy.

Her abdominal muscles seized for a split second, making Rin tense and gasp. The world faded away from her just long enough that when she was aware again, Sesshomaru had moved soundlessly to stand directly behind her. Rin could feel the solidness of his presence at her back, like a wall. The smooth, silken fabric of his hakama brushed her backsides.

Wordlessly, Sesshomaru enveloped her, throwing the long, white expanse of his haori sleeves over her. Rin made a small sound, terror. She pawed at the sleeves, but her vision had changed, the world had faded and blurred together. The same feelings of dizziness and weightlessness took hold of her. Rin felt her lungs straining as if the air were thin. Her flesh broke out in terrible tingles. When she made sound, working her throat to do it, no sound emerged.

The white receded suddenly, and her weight returned heavily. Sesshomaru's arm was wrapped around her waist now, supporting her. Rin coughed, doubling over.

The world swarmed at her, overwhelmingly. Pine trees towered overhead, a moist, wet wind blew on her face, through her messy, dirty hair, and over her damp clothes. Her skin prickled with gooseflesh, her stomach cramped up.

Sesshomaru's grip on her hadn't lessened; in fact the power behind his hand had increased. He forced her upright and began to walk forward. Rin's lower legs and her feet dragged over the ground. Her sandals slipped off.

She dry heaved into the air, more coughing than vomiting. Her body quaked afterwards, shocked. Faintly, her feet tried to work beneath her, beginning to take her weight instinctually as Sesshomaru forced her forward.

They were on a well-worn dirt path, heading steeply uphill. A strong wind brought mist and rain hurtling at them through the thick canopy of pine trees above. Ferns and mossy stones lined the side of the path. Through the rolling mists, Rin could see mountains and cliffs scattered around them, lower in elevation than they were.

As they rounded a corner, she recognized the small, squat form of the Insen castle. It was not a resort, not a place one would take a pregnant mate. It was more like a position to keep a prisoner, a hostage in a time of war.

Rin felt her body break out in hot and cold waves. "Why…" she swallowed the word, still trying to calm her stomach, "Why have you brought me here?"

"It is secure, it is closest." Sesshomaru answered her simply.

His answer made sense, but Rin distrusted it. She might've asked more about it, but in that instant her abdomen convulsed and she cried out. Her feet stalled beneath her, dragging now in earnest. Her hands dug at Sesshomaru's arm and his thighs, searching instinctually for something to clamp onto.

Sesshomaru made a small sound of difficulty in his throat, not a growl, but a short grunt. "You must walk, Rin."

She didn't hear him. One hand clutched at her belly, the other at anything she could reach on Sesshomaru's body. The pain twisted through her, rippling like a living thing, then it died without warning, leaving Rin gasping and sweating.

The single guard watching over the Insen castle in Sesshomaru's absence, had by now taken notice of the strange situation outside. He mounted a horse and rode to meet his visitors. The stallion he rode came up short, rolling its eyes and whinnying when it scented the inuyoukai. The guard grumblingly dismounted and approached the on foot then, falling immediately to a bow before Sesshomaru.

"Lord Sesshomaru." He kept his face very low to the wet, muddied earth, purposefully not looking at either the inuyoukai or at Rin. He was only about five feet from where Rin was partway collapsed into the mud, trying regain her breath after the pain had left her.

Sesshomaru completely skipped the ritual greetings and acknowledgements between servant and lord. Instead he ordered, "Bring her inside."

The guard nodded without lifting his head. "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru." He moved forward on his knees and reached tentatively out toward Rin. He refused to look at her, as if seeing her would bring down some sort of curse on he or his family.

Dazedly, Rin accepted the guard's help. It wasn't long before she was inside the Insen's walls, tucked away inside a tiny bedroom with a dusty, old futon waiting to be pulled out and covered properly with blankets. The guard left her there awkwardly, then moved to play maid by fetching blankets for her, but Sesshomaru stopped him before he got very far.

"You." the inuyoukai lord called, gruffly.

The guard stopped, falling into a low bow. "Yes, lord?"

"Ride to the nearest village. Hire women as maids. Find a healer."

"Yes, lord." The guard bowed again for good measure and hurried off, disappearing down the Insen's gloomy, musty hallway.

* * *

A/N: more to come, that's all for now. I felt a little blah about it, I hate traveling chapters, and I've been busy. Summer's already winding down. For a short time I was emotional (which leads to writer's block for me) over some stupid girl I thought was hitting on my boyfriend. I'm fairly soothed now, I think I was just being paranoid and she's over two hours away anyway. It's raining outside, at last. We're in drought, all the trees are changing their colors early because they don't have enough water to endure. How depressing is that? 


	26. Grudges, Ramen, and Tea

A/N: oh tired, I should be sleeping. Still waiting desperately for rain. The fire danger here is now "extreme." And skies are still clear and blue. I startled crows that were drinking from a leaky pipe that drains AC humidity stuff from a roof at work. It's depressing since I really like rain. And my iTunes is being a bitch, pardon my French. Ugh. I had to remake all my playlists and it's reconverting all of these old music files, it's taken 4-plus hours, it's still doing it as I type this. It really stinks.

Disclaimer: No, do not own them.

* * *

Last Chapter: a little wrap-up. Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and Tsukiyume were briefly examined. Inuyasha has not yet forgiven Kagome. Sesshomaru and Rin traveled for the Western Lands. They remain icy, not having dealt openly with anything that lies between them. Rin's constitution is delicate, her pregnancy is advanced. Only a little further and her baby will survive, but she needs to stay calm in the final haul…

* * *

**Grudges, Ramen, and Tea**

Alone in the castle with her now, Sesshomaru stood frozen, straining his senses and burying his dark, bitter mood. He moved silently to stand in the doorway to the room where the guard had left her. Rin sat motionlessly on the musty matting. Her clothes were filthy, her feet and calves caked with mud. The scent of her sweat was strong, almost overpowering to him.

She needed a bath desperately, but Sesshomaru was anything but a maid or a caretaker. The most he could do was join her for meals, and perhaps, in the wilds, slaughter something. He had saved her life, allowed her to be educated, fed, clothed, every aspect cared for, but most of it happened indirectly, not by his own hand, but by the many hired and helping hands of servants loyal to him.

"Is Sesshomaru afraid Rin will escape him, even now?" her voice reached him, quavering weakly.

Sesshomaru stiffened, but his face remained unchanged. Rin didn't turn to look at him so he continued staring unabashedly at her disheveled hair, her dirt-stained clothes. Without responding to her, he snatched the sliding door and shut it, closing her inside the room alone.

* * *

A/N: I had someone request something from Ginrei. Alas I feel little would be happening there, but I put together a little something anyway. Hope you enjoy.

Jaken had taken the day-to-day care of the Naishougoto palace into his frog-like hands. More maids were brought in to serve Ginrei, more guards and keepers for the grounds. The little palace bustled, humming in the daylight hours with more people than it was truly meant to hold.

Among the additions, Jaken also had an inuyoukai healer brought in. She was an old creature, grayed and wrinkled. Her hands were gnarled, but the ancient outward appearance belied a truer strength hidden beneath. Her real name was never offered up to Jaken or to Ginrei, but instead she was called _En_ for a sound she made often in the back of her throat.

En stayed inside the castle and often kept Ginrei company. Once a week En brewed some herb infusion, or examined Ginrei to be certain that she and the child—Sesshomaru's heir—were healthy. But the old inuyoukai became a grandmother figure to Ginrei quickly, giving Ginrei strength when the gloom of the summer downpours began and when the child inside her began to draw more heavily on her body.

It was also from En that Ginrei heard every bit of news that she could. Sesshomaru's rampage reached her ears in this way, and later the twisted love story of Rin's "abduction."

"The inuyoukai in the Middle Lands, Shimofuri," En told her in her hoarse, rasping voice, "The story on the wind is that Shimofuri took Sesshomaru's mate."

Ginrei watched the clouds passing by, picking up speed as the wind increased. She shook her head with disapproval, though her face failed to show any signs of the emotion. Her eyes were locked on the storm. They were seated on the second floor balcony, watching from the safety of the inside. The screens had been removed from the window, allowing the free air to flow in and for the inuyoukai women to see out.

"These men and their power struggles." She murmured, bitterly.

En made the deep, rumbling sound in the back of her throat that had given her the nickname everyone called her by. "_Ahn._" She swallowed, clearing sludge from her throat, "I may be an old bitch, lady," she gave a short, croaking laugh, "But I have sensed you yourself are not all that different from them."

Ginrei eyed the old woman at her side, her silvered eyes roving over the map of wrinkles there. The old woman was grinning keenly.

"En?" Ginrei asked, hesitantly.

The old woman leaned backward, chuckling again. "Ginrei has often told me how pleased she is that Sesshomaru's heir is _hers._ It is _female._ She will be Ginrei's child, Ginrei's heir. And Ginrei is heir to the Isei."

It was true, and Ginrei had never forgotten the arrangement Sesshomaru had offered her so many months ago. She hadn't seen him in weeks, and hadn't discussed the issue at all, but it had been agreed upon and set down in ink that as soon as Ginrei provided Sesshomaru with a suitable _male_ heir, she would be freed from her marriage to him—and the Isei would belong to her. She could regain her former name, _Nishiyori_ after her uncle the previous ruler of the Isei province, or that of her father, _Seiyo. _Ginrei would be the beginning of a new lineage, and she would have her own land, all the freedom she could want.

It was also true that she had mentioned a few thoughts that had come into her mind as the child made her belly swell, as she thought of the daughter that would be _hers, _and the land that would be _hers._ One of those thoughts had been of making the Isei a unique place all of its own, a place where the female line inherited and left the males in the dust.

The wind buffeted Naishougoto, rattling the eaves, the walls. The screens on the first floor clattered loudly. A flighty maid cried out, praying aloud.

Ginrei pulled her robes more tightly around her, touching the silk reverently. "You have a sharp mind." She smiled dryly, her thoughts lingering on the idea of power, of independence. A woman in charge of an army, a woman collecting the taxes on the farms, from the samurai, and a woman ordering the men in the palaces and the castles about. She could stand, with her daughter at her side, face to face with the inuyoukai lords that had had a hand in the plot to destroy Nishiyori, the lords who still had her family's blood on their hands, in their souls.

A dark thought had always hidden inside her at this thought, though she had never given it serious consideration. With the Isei under her control, if she were to become rich and influential enough, Ginrei could wage a war of her own and exact revenge for her slain kin, for her entire extinct clan.

And the aforementioned Shimofuri was on her list as an enemy—and so was Sesshomaru.

She kept these thoughts to herself. It was only the darkest parts of her that allowed such ideas to sprout, but her loss made her mind and heart fertile ground. If fate saw fit to give her the Isei and all the power and influence she needed, then perhaps Ginrei would be a tool of karma and destiny. It would not be her personal vendetta, but instead it would be the universe equalizing things, setting them right.

Whether En had surmised all of this or not, Ginrei couldn't begin to guess, and she wasn't about to reveal it all. If En was loyal to Sesshomaru than it would surely get back to him, and then her husband would quash her for certain.

"_Ahn,"_ the old woman grunted, rubbing her chin, "What was it that you wished to name your daughter?" she asked, addressing Ginrei directly now.

Ginrei's smile remained unchanged, like a mask's, but now her gaze softened, genuine mirth reached her eyes. "Hanone."

En nodded, "Befitting."

They were silent for a time, watching the storm. Then, through the distant, low rumble of thunder, they heard the pitter-patter of Jaken's moist, flat feet. He stumbled into the doorway, rolling open the screen to look in on them with his round, wide eyes. "What are you doing?" he cried, sounding very much alarmed.

Ginrei and En turned to look at him, both appeared unconcerned. En answered him. "Talking." She grunted.

"With the doors open?" Jaken huffed indignantly and plodded into the room, pushing his way gruffly between the two women and forcing his squat little toady body against the sliding screens between them and the outside balcony. He spoke to them in a strained voice as he worked. "You should both know better! Lady Ginrei, and En! Especially Lady Ginrei! In your condition!"

En sneered at him. "In my day a proper inuyoukai bitch birthed her pup in the thick of the wilderness with just her mate there." She coughed hoarsely and then scowled between Jaken and Ginrei. "Where is Lord Sesshomaru? Why hasn't he come to visit his wife and heir?"

Jaken stopped pushing on the screens to glower irritably. "Our lord does what he wishes! Who are you to question the great Sesshomaru?"

En grunted, unimpressed. "I'm no one. Lady Ginrei is his wife, carrying his heir." She pulled on her fingers, snapping the joints loudly. In spite of her gnarled, aged hands, her claws were still bright and strong, impressive things. "In my day when a male failed to hover over the female carrying his offspring…" she let her voice trail away and instead offered up a quick, violent motion, signaling something unpleasant and probably maiming if not fatal.

Jaken blustered with rage, trying to speak in Sesshomaru's defense, but En cut him off, speaking to Ginrei directly again, ignoring the toad completely. "I know where your husband is, though. Rumor has it that he's killing a few of his own people in the west. A whole samurai clan. Worthless lot them, good riddance."

Ginrei tipped her head slightly to one side. "Why would he be doing that?"

Jaken jabbed one clawed finger at En, "You would do well to learn some manners, old hag! I will have you dismissed if…"

Ginrei shook her head, "No, Jaken, please, as a favor to me, will you allow her to stay?" she met Jaken's gaze with her own and didn't back down.

The toad stared at her for a moment and then heaved a heavy sigh. His shoulders sagged pathetically. "Yes, Lady Ginrei, of course."

Ginrei smiled, "Thank you, Jaken."

Before Jaken could speak anymore to acknowledge her, En interrupted in a deep, gravelly voice. "You're too indulgent, Ginrei. You'll never rule the Isei like that."

Ginrei pursed her lips, staring ahead at the now closed screens while Jaken was taken aback. He mumbled confusedly, demanding to know what En was talking about. The deal between Sesshomaru and Ginrei had never been divulged to the little toad and no one was about to tell him about it now. En ignored his outburst altogether and continued with her previous thought, staring at Ginrei keenly through the darkness of the room.

"Maybe _Hanone_ would be better suited—like her father, but with her mother's ambitions." En grinned darkly.

Ginrei avoided the older woman's eyes, uncertain, wary. En was an unknown to her, and Ginrei herself hardly knew where she stood. Would she be loyal to Sesshomaru when their marriage was ended, when she had power of her own? How would she raise her daughter? She repeated the name she'd chosen for her unborn daughter over and over inside her mind, putting names alongside it, feeling for the right fit.

_Sesshomaru Hanone. Ginrei Hanone. Nishiyori Hanone. Seiyo Hanone…_

Nothing fit perfectly, the way Ginrei wanted it to. As En and Jaken began to fight and bicker in earnest, she stared into the darkness of the room listening to the thunder rolling, contemplating her future and where she would fit herself within it.

* * *

It took a few hours for fresh staff to arrive from the nearest village. Many of them were wary, wide-eyed and overwhelmed at the thought of working for a youkai. And not just any youkai, but the ruler of their lands. The healer that the guard sent ahead of him was a miko, much to Sesshomaru's distaste. Yet, considering the situation, Sesshomaru couldn't turn the woman away.

He waited inside his audience room, which was very small in the Insen, barely worthy of holding human occupants, let alone the son of the great Inutaisho. The Insen was hardly a castle, it was merely a stronghold. It occupied the top of a high, jagged peak. It had only one assailable side and when it was well-defended it would be impossible for anything short of an army to attack it.

The musty mats and rotting wood in a few of the beams sickened Sesshomaru. The castle was in ill-repair, but during his stay before he'd hauled Rin back under his hold, Sesshomaru hadn't noticed it. The world had been a different place, and he had perceived it differently. His senses had dulled and the outside world had faded while the inner landscape of his own mind had swallowed him up whole.

Now that she had returned he was aware of the smallness of the castle, the remoteness of it, and its shabbiness.

He shed his armor in the audience room, setting it carefully, piece by piece onto the matting. The hours passed and the Insen continued to bud with activity. A chef cooked food somewhere in the tiny kitchen, Sesshomaru could smell the smoke and the spices. The maids that had been secured moved about, cleaning and gathering supplies. A few guards gathered, Sesshomaru heard the single horse that the original guard had rode out on.

Water was drawn and heated, bathwater for Rin. Sesshomaru overheard a murmured conversation in a nearby hall concerning robes for Rin.

In the room where he'd last seen Rin, Sesshomaru could feel the miko healer. Her energy made his skin prickle and crawl, but he forced the sensation away, calming himself with an effort. The waiting continued.

* * *

Two maids fussed over Rin, stripping her, scrubbing her skin, washing her hair, and then drying her, combing her hair, and dressing her. The robes they provided were light and stale smelling, as if they'd been in storage for a long time. The scent made Rin's stomach twist and her head start to throb. There were no scented oils, no makeup, nothing elaborate at all, but Rin had ceased caring.

When the maids placed a mirror before her, letting Rin see herself in it while they gushed over her and complimented her, Rin frowned and looked away. Her eyes burned, filling with tears though she tried to fight them. Her face had swollen with extra weight from her pregnancy, her skin was splotchy, and her hair had lost its shine. The suffering she'd endured had marked her appearance. Rin refused to react to the maids' compliments, her appearance sickened her.

The maids escorted her back to her room where they'd made up the futon for her. Like the robes they'd provided, the blankets and the futon itself smelled sour. Rin was thankful for it anyway. Her body was like lead, the world was suffocating her, dragging her down.

A different woman appeared before her then, dressed in the red and white of a priestess. Through her fog, Rin was certain that she was back inside Inuyasha's home, fearing for her daughter as she had months ago when the priestesses from Kagome's village had saved her. She mumbled the name that she remembered from her stay there and tried to reach out to touch the woman standing over her futon.

"Hyakka?"

"No." the miko replied in a distant, cold voice. Rin flinched when she felt the woman's hands on her, poking at her breasts and abdomen.

With more energy than she'd known she possessed, Rin swatted away the priestess's hands. "Stop…"

"Forgive me," the priestess murmured, but the underlying gruffness in her voice suggested that she wasn't all that sorry for what she was about to ask, "When did you last bleed?"

Rin groggily frowned and turned her face away. "Leave me alone."

The priestess ignored her and continued poking Rin's body without care or hesitation. She fought with Rin's hands, pushing her away so that she could loosen Rin's obi and press the flat of her palm against bare flesh. Rin gave in eventually, lifting one arm to shield her face from the intruding priestess while she endured the examination.

After a time the miko withdrew, clearing her throat professionally. "Your child is advanced." There was a pause and then, in an uncertain tone, she asked, "It is hanyou?"

"Why must you know?' Rin demanded, stubbornly.

The miko smiled without mirth. "It is hanyou." She inferred from Rin's hostility the truth of the matter easily. "Pregnancies involving hanyou are difficult to predict. The child may be born before summer is out in only a week or two, or it may wait until the first snowfall to be born."

Rin frowned confusedly. "What are you saying?"

"It is not a normal pregnancy." The miko summarized, scowling. "Forgive me, I must examine you further to learn more." She grabbed at Rin's already loosened robe, but Rin slapped her hands away with shaking fingers.

"Get out of here." She gasped, blinking wildly as tears invaded her eyes and spilled rapidly onto her cheeks.

The priestess bowed stiffly and scooted back from Rin's futon, getting to her feet and leaving the room. She shut the door after her, quietly, and found a guard, requesting to see Sesshomaru. They escorted her to the audience room and admitted her without announcement. The priestess faced the inuyoukai lord and bowed awkwardly before him. Just as her powers made Sesshomaru tense, so the story was the same for the priestess. Serving a youkai unnerved her, making her skin crawl instinctually.

Sesshomaru didn't acknowledge her; in fact he wasn't even looking at her at all, as if he had no interest in her appearance before him whatsoever. After a long time the priestess spoke tentatively, realizing that Sesshomaru wasn't going to give her any kind of signal or permission. She would have to take it herself and hope for the best.

"Your lady has turned me away, Lord Sesshomaru." She murmured, trying not to frown. "I attempted to examine her but—"

"What have you found?" Sesshomaru interrupted. The room was dark; there were no windows in the room and no braziers or lights at all. It was impossible for the priestess to read Sesshomaru's expression, and his voice was ambiguous as well, distinctly uncaring.

"I do apologize, Lord Sesshomaru." She bowed a little, biting her lip, "But I was not permitted to examine your lady. What is it you want me to do?"

"She must be kept calm." Sesshomaru told her, blandly. "Until the child is ready."

"There is something I can mix up for her. It would soothe your lady and help her to sleep, but the effects will only be temporary. Eventually she will become immune to the brew…"

Sesshomaru's voice now was sharp, carrying a small but clear warning inside it. "Miko—whatever she drinks, you will also consume. If she is harmed in any way—or the child—I will have you executed."

The priestess blinked for a moment, startled. She ducked quickly into a bow, hiding her shock from him. "Yes, lord." She was committed to the job, to the payment, to the task. If she tried to back out in that moment, chances were high that Sesshomaru would have her killed on the spot for that failure as well. She was in too deep; her only choice was to do exactly as she was told.

She excused herself and turned to leave. As she exited, the miko heard Sesshomaru address the guard that had escorted her to the audience room. "You—watch over the miko. Kill her if she does not do as I've ordered."

Half an hour later, the miko, named Yuki, followed by the guard that Sesshomaru had designated as her keeper of sorts, reentered Rin's room. Rin was awake but almost unresponsive. She had had one of the maids bring her paper, ink, and a brush at some point while Yuki had been gone. When Yuki and the guard entered, she didn't look up at them but remained fixated on the paper.

The guard remained at the entrance to the door, watchfully. He was wearing a sword and some armor over his shoulders and his thighs, but no helmet. His face was smooth and surprisingly youthful, though his hair was gray. "You must drink with Lady Rin, miko." He reminded her.

Yuki nodded wordlessly. Grasped in her hands was a ceramic pot. She held it gingerly because it was hot—the mouth of the thing was still steaming. Inside was tea with the pasty mixture of sedative herbs that Yuki knew of. She walked into Rin's room stiffly, hoping faintly for the best. If she failed the penalty was death.

As Yuki approached Rin, she stopped, feeling a spurt of alarm. On the futon where she'd left Rin before, Yuki could see some brown-red splotches on the blankets. When she looked at Rin again, she noted that Sesshomaru's mate was scowling fiercely at the paper; sweat was beaded on her brow. She was in pain but refusing to show it. Even more suspiciously was the way Rin was sitting, with her legs parted awkwardly in a cross-legged position, her robes askew, and some thick, cheap matting placed underneath her like a sitting mat. But it wasn't a sitting mat, it was being used as a mop to try and save the tatami mats.

Yuki felt her own body beginning to sweat in waves of hot and cold. _I'm going to die…_

She sat down on the floor across from Rin and placed the pot between them. "My lady…"

Rin didn't look up at her; the paper consumed her entire world. She was holding her long sleeve back from her writing hand as she made a few tight, carefully controlled strokes. The markings were unrecognizable to Yuki.

"My lady, you must drink this with me." Yuki gestured toward the pot and then, uncertainly, she looked back at the guard. "We need teacups…"

He craned his neck around and shouted orders out into the hall, summoning the maids. A moment later a few little cups were placed in front of Yuki and Rin, little light green cups with darker green painted images of leaves over the insides and outsides. The maid that brought the cups also poured the tea for them, wrinkling up her nose silently as she smelled the bitterness of the brew.

"Please, my lady, you must drink with me, then you can continue your work." Yuki's hands were shaking as she reached for her own cup and tried to lift it to drink it and get her part of the agreement finished with.

Rin gave one short shake of her head. The muscles on her neck stood out, cording with strain and stress. At first Yuki thought Rin was responding to her question, but then she heard the other woman speak again, faintly. "Will it take away the pain?"

"It will relax you, may lady." Yuki replied, licking her lips nervously. "Please—it has a bitter taste I'm afraid, but it will make you feel better. You will sleep through the pain."

Rin's hand holding the brush stopped and then lowered. The tip smeared over the paper, obscuring a few of the characters. On a closer, although still brief inspection, Yuki found that she couldn't read them still. Rin's voice was hoarse and rasping when she spoke. "Can…can you save my baby?"

Tears spattered onto the rice paper, blurring the ink of the bizarre characters.

"I can try." Yuki held her breath, trying to hold out hope, though her spirits were fast sinking. "My lady…you are bleeding?"

Rin at last glanced at her, searching the miko's face. Her complexion was pale and gray, ashen, and her features were puffy from nearly continual crying. Her forehead and the top of her nose creased with pain. "Somewhat."

"I will do my best, my lady." Yuki bowed slightly, offering Rin respect, but the other woman flinched, completely dropping the brush now. In her sudden movement, she also knocked over the inkwell. It spilled thickly onto the matting, pooling like black blood.

"My lady?"

Rin was clutching at her belly; her face was twisted with pain. "Tell me the truth!" she croaked through clenched teeth. Her nostrils were flaring with each breath, in and out.

"Please," Yuki begged unabashedly now, "Drink this with me." She lifted one of the teacups and pushed it toward Rin as if it were a peace offering or a lavish gift. Before Rin reacted at all, Yuki had already picked up her own cup and sipped half of it down. She frowned at the taste and turned to make sure that the guard had watched the act. He had, and he nodded in acknowledgement.

Rin had begun sobbing; her breathing was hitched with pain. It caught every so often, as if Rin were on the verge of a seizure. In reality it was merely grief that overwhelmed her. "It's too soon," she choked, doubled over. When a pain hit her she gasped and froze, her body stiffened. As it passed, however, she set her hand down in the pool of black ink and then withdrew it again, astonished. She lifted her hand as it dripped with the ink and stared at it as if she'd never seen anything so amazing.

Yuki swallowed nervously, feeling her stomach curl into a ball of apprehension. "Please my lady, drink the tea…"

Bitterness warped Rin's features and she deliberately set her blackened hand into her lap and over other spots on the soured tatami matting. Yet, just when Yuki was about to speak to ask that Rin drink the tea again, Rin unexpectedly grabbed the cup and brought it to her lips. When she set the cup down on the matting it was empty except for a few drops in the bottom, and Rin was scowling disgustedly at the taste, though she said nothing.

Yuki bowed deeply, "Thank you, my lady."

Rin made a small noise, a sort of hiccup, and then she moved stiffly away from the paper and the spilled ink, clear of the mat beneath her. Yuki gasped as she saw the space that Rin had been sitting over: a pool of blood coated the mat, mimicking the spilled ink off to one side.

"My lady…" Yuki murmured, feeling despair weight her limbs and constrict her chest. _The bleeding…I'll lose the child for certain, and she isn't doing very well either…_

"Sesshomaru did this to me." Rin spat. Her body had begun to shake, quivering like water in an earthquake. "He's never wanted a child with me." her eyes were unfocused, gazing off into nowhere. "He did this…"

"My lady, I must examine you." Yuki's voice had grown firmer and stronger. She rose from the floor and toward the guard standing in the door. As she reached to slide the door closed, the guard moved into the room, his booted feet pressing into the old tatami mats.

"Please, sir. You cannot be here for this. Please, wait outside."

The guard seemed to realize what this examination entailed and he nodded, stepping outside of the door and allowing her to shut it without a word. His face had paled. Perhaps he was wondering if Yuki's failure would equate to his failure as well. Would he die for the priestess's shortcomings, or for the inevitability of death?

Already Yuki was starting to feel her own limbs growing heavy, a fog shrouded her mind. The thought of Rin or of Rin's unborn child dying, and with them herself, had stopped bothering her so much. There was still a dim sense of panic, but it could be pushed aside. The herbs in her brew were powerful and swiftly absorbed into the body.

Yet Rin hadn't stopped crying, and now, in wiping away her tears, she'd stained her skin with the ink on her hand. As Yuki urged her to lie on her futon and open her robe for the examination, Rin babbled deliriously about Sesshomaru's sabotage. Her emotion kept her awake, though Yuki saw that Rin was having trouble moving her lips as she spoke, and her eyes were drifting closed. Yuki wasn't doing much better either, even though she hadn't had as much of the brew.

Finally Yuki's coaxing forced the stubborn, dazed Rin onto her futon. When her head lied flat on the pillows, Rin's body went instantly limp as she lost her battle with the calming, sleep-inducing effects of the brew. Yuki went feverishly then to her work. Loosening Rin's clothes, she peeled them open and, with her lips pinched tightly together, she felt about Rin's body, her breasts and her belly, before turning her attention to the bleeding. The blood was sluggish, but it was undeniable.

Yuki stared at the ceiling, helplessly, turning her eyes away from the sight. The blood was over Rin's thighs, soaking through the under robe she wore, and into the outer one now as well. How long would it take before it reached the blankets, the sheets, and the futon mattress itself? The floor? How long before it was too much blood loss? The child had to be dead or dying. The blood was about the right amount that Yuki expected to see in a laboring woman.

Holding her breath and closing her eyes, Yuki ducked and pressed her ear to Rin's abdomen, straining with everything she had for the thumping of a heartbeat. She expected to hear Rin's heart—a slow beat set by the drugs from the tea she was ingesting—but in fact Rin's heart escaped her ears completely. Instead, powerful and pounding away like the cadence drums in a marching army; Yuki heard the child's heart.

Baffled, Yuki closed Rin's robe, tying the obi messily, and crossed the room to the door. She slid it open and faced the guard somberly. "I have finished."

"What did you find?" the guard asked, tensely. His face was pallid.

Yuki kept her eyes to the floor; her lips were still firmly pinched together. "She is bleeding. The child has a heartbeat…" she paused, blinking as she reconsidered the situation. In her examination, Yuki had seen a fairly advanced pregnancy, perhaps more so than she expected considering Rin's pronouncement: _"It's too soon." _

"She has entered labor." Yuki changed her prediction, drawing a deep breath.

The guard's shoulders relaxed slightly, making his armor sink in a shrugging motion. "How long?"

"It could be hours, it could be days." Yuki replied, uncertainly.

"Then I guess we're going to be here awhile." He grunted, haphazardly smiling at her.

* * *

When Inuyasha returned home, it was, inevitably, for food. Kagome had made a small meal that evening because earlier in the day she'd taken Akisame and Koinu to her mother's house. For herself it was a few fruits and vegetables and dip that she'd brought from the twentieth century. She hadn't had much of an appetite since she'd returned from visiting her family just the previous night, when Sesshomaru had come and briefly taken Koinu hostage. She'd eaten a large meal there with her mother and brother and aging grandfather. The large meal had carried her over through the day and into the current night.

It was Father's Day on the other side of the well; Kagome's aging grandfather had been the honored guest. Kagome had eaten with her family and cherished their presence, but seeing her grandfather in the time of celebration saddened her as well. In the most recent months he'd begun having problems with his joints, and then with memory. He was weakened and frail. Even his voice had gathered a wobble in it that she couldn't remember being there the last time she'd seen him.

On a shopping excursion before the dinner, Kagome had bought Inuyasha, Koinu, and Akisame all gifts. She'd bought things for Sango and Miroku too, but those gifts would have to wait for another time. Because of Father's Day, Kagome had focused on the fathers within their extended Feudal era family. Sandals that would pamper Miroku's feet, and several items for Inuyasha. A fishing pole, though she doubted he'd ever use it, a book of world history because it would amuse him, and a few things that only a wife would be privy to, such as the moisturizer she'd picked up because Inuyasha often complained of dried hands and feet, or the mineral ice for old injuries and muscle aches that came to pain him horribly just before and during the new moon.

Now she prepared Ramen with beef flavoring for her husband and waited with the noodles still hovering over the cooking fire, staying warm. Just before dark, as she anticipated, Inuyasha returned home.

She knew at once that he was in a bad mood by the way the hanyou stamped his feet on the verandah, trying to clean his feet of dirt and mud and wetness before coming inside. Normally, to be quiet, Inuyasha actually dusted his feet off with his hands. The stamping motion was something he adopted out of anger—and because he tended to forget niceties and ritual when he was bent out of shape and had his mind wrapped around something else. He was distracted by his emotion, and that made him forget to clean his feet properly.

He crossed into their home, opening and closing the front door without a word. He moved through the tiny reception room and into the kitchen area where his nose would've told him long ago there was a hot fire, guaranteeing food. The hanyou glared at her as he entered, and then let his golden eyes rove over the room, searchingly. "Where…"

Kagome interrupted him, assuaging his worry. "Koinu and Akisame are at my mother's."

Inuyasha threw his shoulders back stiffly. "Feh." His ears swiveled uncertainly. He wasn't sure why she hadn't stayed with their children, but decided not to ask when he noticed the Ramen waiting for him.

Without word, Kagome poured him a bowl, heaping the noodles and bits of meat and vegetables she'd added to the broth. Inuyasha had never complained about her editions to the basic Ramen recipe, but he'd never thanked her either. Not complaining was usually a step in the right direction for her crotchety husband. Inuyasha took the bowl from her without complaint and left for the table in the sitting room. After a moment, Kagome rose and moved to one corner of the room, snatching up a bundle wrapped in fabric.

As she entered the sitting room, Inuyasha growled irritably and pushed the Ramen away from him. "Dammit!" he pawed at his mouth, feeling inside. "Now I've burned myself."

Kagome settled across from him, slipping the bundle onto the table just to one side. "You should've blown on it a little."

He growled again, this time staring at her, his mouth pain almost forgotten. "You should've warned me—"

"You saw it was on the fire." Kagome interrupted, her eyebrows lifting high into her forehead at the venom in his voice. "I'm sorry you burned your mouth, but it wasn't my fault."

He continued to glare at her for a long moment, unwilling to drop his hostilities over it, and then at last turned his attention back to the steaming bowl. Lifting his chopsticks, he stirred the Ramen, toying with the noodles. His expression was one she'd seen Koinu wear when he'd found a tick burrowed in his skin, sucking his blood. The boy had worked with intensity, pulling the offending bloodsucker from his flesh and then cutting it carefully in half with his pinky claw. Inuyasha stirred the noodles the same way their son had squashed the tick—as if the soup had offended him.

The real offender, however, was Kagome, and she understood this. Inuyasha was prone to anger at inanimate objects it was true, but in this case his inability to let go of it, and his failure to meet her eye for any length of time, proved it clearly to her.

"Why aren't you with Koinu and Aki?" Inuyasha demanded abruptly.

"I decided I needed to stay here with you, Inuyasha." She replied, honestly, in a gentle, concerned tone.

The hanyou glanced up at her once, skeptically. "Koinu's the one that almost fuckin' died." He snarled, ears flattening. "Not me."

She sighed, slowly. "I know you left the house because you're upset. I couldn't very well leave with Koinu and Akisame without telling you, could I?"

"Feh." He answered, apparently defeated. He pinned a few noodles between his chopsticks and lifted them into his mouth, slurping unabashedly.

"Inuyasha," Kagome began, staring at her hands clasped in her lap, "I am truly sorry. I…I just wanted to help her. She was in need and, I guess I sympathized with her. I know how it feels to…" she swallowed nervously, knowing that her next words would embarrass and possibly infuriate her husband, "…to know the person you love hasn't been entirely faithful."

He jerked his head up as she finished, speaking immediately, blusteringly. "Hey! That was _different_! Don't pull that shit! There was nothing going on between us back then Kagome…"

"And that makes her story all the worse. Can't you see that?" she shook her head sadly, blinking back a few tears. "You must believe me, if I'd known it would end this way with Sesshomaru almost…" she covered her face briefly with her hands and then pulled them away again, going on hurriedly. "I never would've fought you on it, you were right Inuyasha, I'm sorry. Really, I am."

"Feh, cut it out—I believe you." Inuyasha's ears laid backward and he met her eyes unwaveringly now.

"Can you forgive me?" Kagome pressed.

The hanyou turned his eyes heavenward, heaving a frustrated sigh. "Yeah!"

In spite of his words, Kagome could see the reluctance in his posture and hear the hostility in his single word. He would forgive her, but it would take time, as well as effort.

Kagome sat back in her seat and pushed the bundle of fabric forward, letting it attract Inuyasha's interest. Already the hanyou had gone back to slurping his Ramen, he was always hungry. His eyes watched her movement over the bowl, the honeyed color brighter now. Setting the bowl back down half empty, he wiped his mouth messily and asked, "What's that?"

"These are a few things I got for you from my era." She smiled, hoping to encourage a lighter mood. "I hope you'll like them."

Inuyasha grunted and reached for the bundle without comment. He tugged at the fabric, opening it and exposing a little round plastic container of mineral ice, a thick, rectangular paperback book, and a bottle of skin moisturizer. For a moment he stared at the objects, blinking, then pushed aside the mineral ice and the moisturizer to get a better look at the book. "What's this?"

Kagome nodded. "It's a book, but this one's paperback." There'd been times while they were traveling when she'd caught Inuyasha reading a textbook she'd left out. Until the first time she'd witnessed that, she hadn't known Inuyasha could read anything more than a young child, if even that. It just didn't seem necessary for him considering what he was and how he lived. Yet, she'd realized he was smarter than he let on early in her acquaintance.

Later, after they knew one another much more intimately, she'd tried to share the books with him, novels or other things on subjects she thought he would enjoy, and had discovered that Inuyasha actually _couldn't _read as she thought he could. Between the Feudal era when he was taught and her own time, Japanese had changed enough that Inuyasha could read her textbooks, but there were many characters that had changed. It was like listening to someone with a heavy accent. He could pick out words he knew among those he didn't and from there gather a basic understanding. Now she'd managed to get him to learn more and to keep reading, though he continued to treat books as though they were foreign and more frustrating than anything else.

"_A Brief History of the World…_" Inuyasha repeated, narrowing his eyes on the title carefully. He thumbed at the pages and scowled deeply. "Brief?"

"You'll like it." Kagome assured him, smilingly. "The author is funny. It'll tell you about all the other places around the world and what happens there, what it's like."

He quirked an eyebrow. "Feh." He let the book go and poked at the mineral ice and the moisturizer. "Mineral ice." he read the characters aloud and then noticed the English characters as well and scoffed derisively. "This is what you're teaching Koinu and Aki."

She nodded, "It's called English. Do you want to learn too?"

"Not a chance!" he shot back, grumblingly. He touched the bottle of moisturizer and frowned at the word on the label. "What the hell is that? I can't read it."

The word was one that didn't exist in the Feudal era. Kagome explained the character and the word patiently, then told him its purpose. "It's to put on your skin, a cream. It gets rid of dry skin. You know when your hands and feet are dry in the winter…"

The hanyou's ears pricked up eagerly. "Feh." He held the bottle in one hand, still examining it, but though he wouldn't say as much, Kagome could tell it'd been, strangely, a good choice.

"Thanks." He told her after a while, gruntingly.

"You're welcome." Kagome replied, gently. She watched as he went back to his Ramen, slurping it and catching pieces of meat between his chopsticks and sniffing at them before stuffing them into his mouth. After he'd eaten most of it and had lifted the bowl to swallow the rest of the broth, Kagome got to her feet and circled around the table to sit behind him. His ears followed her as she moved, tracking her.

When she sat down behind him, Inuyasha set down the bowl and, through an interrupting burp, demanded, "What are you up to?"

She didn't answer; instead her fingers found his ears and stroked them lightly with fingertips and fingernails. His posture changed, he inhaled sharply once, but he pulled his head away from her and turned to glare at her with one golden eye angrily. "Stop that."

Kagome sighed, frustrated. She'd hoped she could diffuse Inuyasha's anger, but he was being very thoroughly stubborn. It was impossible for Kagome to do anything else other than what she had—apologize. There was no way to take back what had happened, it was in the past. Holding a grudge would get neither of them anywhere good. And yet, as she stared at her husband's golden glare, Kagome knew that when their positions had been reversed and _she_ was angry over something…

It was very hard to just drop emotion, especially if it was a powerful one.

Defeated, Kagome reached out and stroked his shoulder, squeezing it as she got to her feet. "I'm going to clean up, Inuyasha. I hope you enjoyed the Ramen. I…I am sorry…"

His ears flattened and his mouth opened as if he were about to speak, but Kagome ducked in front of him and snatched his empty bowl and disappeared into the kitchen before he said anything. She didn't trust him not to be venomous just yet. He wasn't ready to forgive her; the threat had been too near, too severe. She'd give him a little more time…

* * *

And more later...I don't know what was wrong with FFnet but it refused to let me upload this chapter for a long time. Has anyone else had that problem? Any idea why it flakes out like that? 


	27. Labor

A/N: It's finally raining here! Hallelujah! My boyfriend was baptized a few weeks ago, but this week I say goodbye to him as he heads back to his college some two hours away. I will be moving back into the dorm as well. Oh, happy-ish days. I'll have a new roommate this semester because my last one backstabbed me, but she'll still be in the same hall and I couldn't hold a grudge. I'll see and enjoy her company again soon. But I hope that my new roommate, who seems to have a good family and some faith too, will work out much better.

Disclaimer: Nope don't own him

* * *

Last chapter: Yuki the priestess examined Rin and gave her a calming tea. She announced that Rin is in labor. Kagome tried to make up with Inuyasha, but he's just not ready to drop his resentment.

* * *

**Labor**

The rain continued to fall outside, drumming on the ground, pouring from the eaves. Yuki and the two maids stayed at Rin's bedside, waiting and tending her. The guard watched over them, oftentimes from just outside of the door. The contamination by blood, and by his own basic fear of such strongly female things, kept him from actively entering the room.

Into the nighttime Rin slept with little trouble. She was pale and sweating and her face creased periodically with pain, but the contractions were still few and far between, though they were gaining intensity as far as pain went. The tea worked well on her, she scarcely opened her eyes until the moon rose and the rain clouds scattered. The moon cast its thin, sickly light through the screens. When it fell on the bed, Rin began to waken at last.

She gasped weakly as her mind became conscious. The moonlight swamped her eyes, making Rin cringe and lift one hand feebly to shield them. Aside from the light, her world was dominated by the dull ache over her belly, radiating over and through her. She made a small sound and turned her face out of the light, one hand went searchingly out over her body, looking for the source of her pain but finding nothing.

The sharp smell of herbs made her cringe. A wet cloth was draped over her forehead, gentle touching hands moved over her body. As the pain faded slightly, she allowed herself to breathe normally again and to try speaking. "What…"

She stopped when she felt someone's cold hand on her thigh, spreading her legs apart. Before she could react to it, she felt the same cold fingers probing between her legs and tensed, reaching out to try and stop it while at the same time struggling to speak. None of it did any good as pain streaked through her, making Rin curl instinctually into a ball as her muscles clenched with agony. When the world floated back to her, Rin was aware of two things: her hoarse panting and a liquid warmth between her legs.

Memory came back to her in spurts. The blood on the tatami mats, the spilled ink on her palm, the whiteness of Sesshomaru's kimono sleeves as they enveloped her, the weightlessness and sickness that traveling in that white world had brought onto her.

It was June, the start of high summer, and Rin was certain that her daughter was premature, the bleeding was too soon. Sesshomaru had killed this baby, the oldest, strongest one she'd ever had…

The grief of such realizations was muted by pain and by the remnants of the calming tea. Rin closed her eyes, feeling tears in her eyes, their hotness as they spilled onto her cheeks, but not the grief that they belied. Her hands fisted in the sheets on the futon.

A priestess was before her, though Rin's vision was blurred, she could still make out the shape and colors. The miko had long, streaming black hair and long, delicate fingers. When she moved over Rin, adjusting the cold cloth over her forehead, Rin recognized the touch as belonging to the person that had spread her legs.

Rin caught the miko's hand in her own as she moved away. "Tell me what's…" she cut herself off, breathing hard, "…what's going on?"

The miko pulled her hand from Rin's stiffly. She was cold, businesslike. "You are in labor, my lady. Please, do as I say for the benefit of yourself and your child."

Rin might've spoken to the miko more, but she was distracted by what the priestess's hands had left on her fingertips. Blood. Rich, thick, and sticky. Rin knew it was her own. The redness was the same as Inuyasha's haori, and the same as Sesshomaru's eyes before he took on his true form.

Rin choked a little, feeling the first jolt of grief and fear. Women died in childbirth and miscarriage all the time. The blood and fluid loss, the pain and grief and stress…

She rubbed the sticky blood between her fingers, lucidly aware of its color and texture, and in that moment, her own mortality.

Another pain gripped her and she bit back a cry, half-holding her breath as it intensified. The priestess appeared at her side, shouting something. Rin was unable to make it out, nor did she care to until the pain subsided. As the wave of it crashed over her and at last faded, she found herself panting and covered with sweat. Her muscles trembled already with exhaustion.

The priestess hadn't left her side, and she was still calling to Rin incessantly. "You must _breathe_, my lady. You must _breathe_ when the contractions come. Soon you must push as well…"

"Push." Rin repeated, like a parrot. She had closed her eyes, seemingly falling unconscious, but in reality her mind was awake and aware. Her fingers rubbed the blood, now clotting grittily, between them.

In a near-dream state, Rin saw a flash of pink jet across her closed eyelids. Her mind picked this color out and painted a cherry tree in full blossom, the petals from its flowers fluttered in the wind. It dripped them to the ground or to a small stream, rocky and babbling. The leaves quivered in the breeze, as her own muscles did now.

In the dream she was a child, digging her hands into the chilled waters of the river, startling little minnows and tadpoles out of her way. Jaken called behind her, welcoming Sesshomaru back to them. The sunlight reflecting from the water was blinding…

She snapped out of the waking dream—or was it memory?—to hear the miko murmuring instructions to the maids in a low, darkened voice. "Get more cloth for the blood. Tell the guard to bring word to Lord Sesshomaru that the child will come before dawn."

"Yes, ma'am."

Part of Rin wanted to reach out and grab the maid and the priestess together and order them not to tell Sesshomaru anything. _He only wants my daughter to die. He has no need of her, or of me. He only keeps me with him now as punishment because I tried to escape him._

Yet, as her voice croaked, trying to get the priestess's attention, Rin stopped, recalling the dream and the blood. If she died before dawn…

Her small sound had been enough after all to attract the priestess. She knelt at Rin's bedside, touching her forehead and asking if she needed anything. Rin ignored the question and clawed at the miko's robes, grabbing her by the collar.

"Tell Sesshomaru…" she rasped between breaths, "That he must…come to me."

The priestess's mouth fell open, gaping. She shook her head. "I can't do that, my lady…"

Weakly, Rin pulled on her robe, trying to shake the other woman. "He must come…" she choked.

Another pain swarmed over her and Rin's hands squeezed frantically on the miko's collar. When it at last passed, she fell limp, drenched in fresh sweat and breathing hard. The miko disappeared, leaving her bedside and heading for the door.

* * *

Yuki found herself standing before the doorway to the audience room where Sesshomaru was inside, waiting. He hadn't moved for hours the maids had told her. They believed him to be anxious and in waiting, but they were new to him, new to his service, and couldn't read him well. Yuki wouldn't have any better luck, but she did know that his behavior reminded her of many loyal husbands, distraught at the thought of their wives in pain and bleeding from labor. It would be so easy for them to lose everything in the struggle, and be left alone. They had no power in it at all…

Youkai didn't like things that robbed them of power, not at all.

But it was highly unusual for a man to go to his wife while she was laboring. It wasn't a clean time and by custom it was almost forbidden. Yuki had taken long, nervous minutes in washing her hands, arms, her feet, her face and neck…everything she could without taking a proper bath. Normal men would've only been mildly perturbed by her leaving the laboring wife to deliver such a strange, preposterous message to them, but Sesshomaru was an inuyoukai. He would smell Rin on Yuki still, and he would know that things were potentially very grim.

Even Rin's request seemed very dark to Yuki. She knew that Rin blamed Sesshomaru for the early labor, for the inevitable death of her child. Did Sesshomaru know that? Was it true? Why had Rin seemingly lost her mind and demanded that Sesshomaru join her while she labored?

With shaking hands, Yuki reached for the door and slid it open. The inside of the audience room was dark. It was without windows and there were no lights to brighten it. Yuki fell to her knees in a bow the moment she set both feet inside the audience room. The matting was sour to her nose, she stifled a sneeze and wondered how an inuyoukai could stand being inside the Insen in its state of disgrace, trapped unmoving inside an audience room that drove her weak human nose mad.

There was a long, tense moment of silence. There was a guard in the room, he shifted uneasily. Yuki heard the sound of his armor shifting. From straight ahead of her, where Sesshomaru sat, there came no sound at all.

The guard broke the silence, querying hesitantly, "Lord Sesshomaru?"

There was a small sniffing sound, just once, and then Sesshomaru spoke, as if he were waking from some sort of dozing nap. "Miko?"

Yuki sat up, taking that as her cue immediately. "Lord Sesshomaru—your lady has asked to see you."

The shadowy shape ahead of her didn't move and didn't reply. The guard did it for him, growling angrily, "And why aren't you with her?"

This was a different guard than the one posted outside Rin's room. This man was a suck-up, interested in impressing Sesshomaru. Yuki doubted that he was foolish enough to try and make small talk with the demon lord, but his behavior screamed his intentions loud enough. Sesshomaru was fully capable of speaking if he wished, but since he made no move to reply it was silence apparently that he wanted; he didn't want or need a pesky guard to act as his voice.

Yuki's suspicion proved correct as Sesshomaru's form moved, turning slowly to regard the man. Foolishly the man was staring at Yuki, trying to intimidate her.

"I am delivering her message to Lord Sesshomaru. She insisted—"

Sesshomaru lifted his hand in a sharp motion, silencing her. "Do not answer him."

Yuki closed her mouth and bowed, murmuring apologies. The guard shifted uncomfortably. They waited until Sesshomaru spoke again, breaking the silence.

"The child will come before dawn." He was repeating the news that Yuki had sent to him through the maid. There was a note of darkness inside his voice, a slight pause that made Yuki suspect that the inuyoukai was fighting some strong emotion, but just what she couldn't be certain of. "This is true?"

Yuki swallowed nervously and tried to control the shaking of her voice. "Her labor has progressed swiftly, my lord. Yes, I believe it is true." She stopped, looking between him and the guard uncertainly, trying to read their faces, though it was impossible in the dark. "She has called for you, Lord Sesshomaru. She asks that you come to her."

She expected him to say no, or perhaps to dismiss her without a final word, but instead Sesshomaru shifted in his seat, as if uncomfortable. Yuki saw the flash of his long, streaming white hair, like snow from winter that would never melt away. He asked, "She is delirious?"

Yuki blinked. "I…I am not sure, my lord."

"Tell me the circumstances." Sesshomaru ordered. His words had become bland, almost gentle with patience, encouraging her to follow the order in depth.

"My lady…she pulled me to her and asked that I summon Lord Sesshomaru to see her. I told my lady that I could not do such a thing, but my lady insisted that I bring Lord Sesshomaru to her." Yuki wrung her hands together and stared at the floor.

"You told her you could not?" the sharp tone was unmistakable, and though she might've imagined it, Yuki thought she heard an intake of air, the kind that might be done when rage or fury boils the blood.

"My lord, the tradition…" she shook her head helplessly, wondering if perhaps she had guessed completely wrong when it came to inuyoukai, "It is labor. It is unclean…"

"You are all unclean." The sneer in his voice was clear, though Yuki couldn't see his face. The disgust was obvious. She bowed low, muttering an immediate apology. The guard shifted again uncomfortably. Shockingly, Sesshomaru wasn't finished; he spoke again, adding, "It is life."

They both muttered apologies now, though they couldn't understand Sesshomaru completely. As Yuki prostrated herself anew, Sesshomaru rose to his feet and, weightless and soundless, slipped past her toward the door.

Shocked, with her mouth hanging open, Yuki jumped to her feet and hurried after him, leaving the guard alone in the darkness of the audience room.

* * *

When the miko had come to him, sheepishly telling him that Rin had summoned him, Sesshomaru had assumed the worst, and not incorrectly so. The miko had brought the stink of Rin's blood to him freshly. Bits of it hid in her clothes, as did the reek of Rin's sweat. Before, sitting in the audience room waiting, he had scented it through the halls and even through the walls only dimly. The mustiness of the Insen had partially obscured his olfactory sense.

News of their daughter's impending birth set him on edge, though exactly why he wasn't certain of. Sesshomaru generally abided by culture—as it was dictated by humans—when it came to "unclean" things, such as labor. Yet, as a youkai, he had taken life more times than he'd probably blinked, certainly more than he cared to count. Why should the creation of life be any different? It was so much rarer, and yet just as traumatic and messy. It was unclean, just as revenge, murder, assassination, and death were.

That the miko would hesitate to tell him of Rin's request—and it did appear that it was a _request_, not a delirious plea for his presence or aid—infuriated him.

He found himself before the closed door to Rin's room, smelling her blood and sweat so acutely now that his skin crawled. The guard here had stepped aside wordlessly, a wise move. Sesshomaru's sharp ears could pick up the sound of the miko hurrying after him, rounding the corner. As she came around it and could see him, she slowed her approach, trying to muster dignity and to avoid insulting him.

She'd do better to follow the guard's actions, to turn away, to let him do as he rightly wished.

Sesshomaru found that his muscles were tense; the joints of his arm were slow to respond, as if they were reluctant to enter Rin's room. It wasn't the carnage that he feared, the blood or the sweat, but it was what all of that would mean. Was Rin dying? He couldn't bring her back from the netherworlds any longer; already she had cheated death far too many times. There were things that even Sesshomaru couldn't do.

What would he do? If Rin died and the child along with her…or somehow worse still, what would he do if Rin died but the child survived? He had lost his father when Inuyasha, a _hanyou_, was born. Would he lose his mate to that same curse? How could he look at their daughter, _her_ daughter, _his_ daughter, knowing that she had killed Rin?

Yet the same could be said of him…_I transported her here. I knew it sickened her…_

Sesshomaru slid the door open and paused, staring into it.

The stench of blood tackled him, strong and overpowering. The mats around the futon were stained with red-brown marks, Rin's blood. A pool of black ink also marred the mats, smeared around. In one place he saw a clear handprint. The two maids were positioned around Rin's futon, their faces tight with fear.

Rin, lying on her futon, drew his eyes lastly, as if the sight took effort and courage to get to, like running up a hill. A sheet covered her legs, but Sesshomaru could see the bloodied rags lying around her and poking out from underneath the blankets. There was blood around her head, smeared by fingers and the touch of the maids and the miko. Rin's face was shiny with sweat and with tears. She was still wearing a robe from the daytime hours, not a night robe. No one had bothered to change it with the swiftness of her oncoming labor. Her hair was a wild, uncombed black mess spread over the pillows.

As a child he had rescued her, dirt-stained, rail-thin, and barely speaking. The woman before him, bleeding and broken, gripped him just as the tiny girl's corpse—maimed and eaten by wolves—had years ago. In that different time, in those lost days of innocence, he had knelt and helped her to her feet himself with his single arm and the stump of the other still smarting from the blow delivered by his brother.

History had a funny, twisted way of repeating itself.

Pushing open the door as wide as it would allow, Sesshomaru strode into the room. The maids scattered before him, whimpering with fear and dismay. Sesshomaru ignored them as he knelt at Rin's bedside and reached out to her face, touching her moist, hot cheek.

"Rin." His voice was gruff and deep, reminding him of his father's on the night they had last spoken. Inutaisho's wounds had weighed on him, and so had Sesshomaru's cruel heart. They hadn't exchanged a proper farewell, and now they never would.

On the futon she opened her eyes gradually, flutteringly. Her brown eyes were deep and dark; they appeared black like the spilled ink on her tatami matting. Yet when she saw Sesshomaru her mouth opened wide and her hands lifted with surprising strength from the sheets, reaching hungrily for him. Her eyes grew moist, clouding at once with tears.

"Sesshomaru…" she croaked his name out in a rasping voice. Her hands closed over his collar tightly. Sesshomaru could smell the blood and sweat on them. His kimono was red and blue at the top, but there were a few places where it was white. It was a rich silk, befitting an immortal lord poised to go into a massive war, but though it might stain, Sesshomaru gave it no thought at all. If a kimono was to be sacrificed for Rin, then it would be a tiny price to pay indeed.

He didn't take his eyes from Rin's face as he commanded, "Leave."

The maids, half crying, did as they were told, exiting the room at once. The guard reached to close the door after them, but the miko stopped him, slipping inside and prostrating herself. "Lord Sesshomaru…"

Now he turned away from Rin, openly frowning. "Get out."

The miko bowed again, muttering apologies. The glimpses that Sesshomaru got of her face expressed shock and terror. Clearly she believed that if she didn't leave he would kill her. She left the room and closed the door herself, but she didn't go very far away, perhaps believing that soon Sesshomaru would excuse himself and leave the woman's work to the women once again.

She was going to be surprised.

"Sesshomaru." Rin called, pulling on his collar with one hand. When he looked at her, meeting her frankly in the eye, she touched his cheek. Sesshomaru felt the grit of her clotted blood left behind by her fingertips. "I'm…" she hiccupped and the tears began to flow without ceasing. "…sorry…"

He blinked at her once, startled, and found that he couldn't find a thing to say, nothing…

"I love you." she whispered, sobbingly. "I love you."

Sesshomaru stared at her, almost unseeingly. Her behavior baffled him; he fought the desire to frown at her, but knew she would see it—if she was thinking clearly. Why would she call him for this?

Rin's gaze was searching his face, reading his expression in her usual, knowing way, but the tears continued to flow, and the raw twist of emotion—despair—in her face remained unchanging. If anything it intensified. "I want…" but her words were cut off as she squeezed her eyes closed tightly and gritted her teeth. Her hands on the collar of his kimono clenched, her entire body trembled.

The answer came to Sesshomaru with a jolt as he watched her body quivering, heard her heart hammering wildly, smelled the richness of her tears, her grief, her sweat, and her blood. _She believes she will not survive this…_

_No…no…_

He gripped her arm with his hand and tried to pull her closer or to pull her upright. He succeeded only in pulling her closer. The contraction had not yet passed, and Rin's body had snapped taut, every muscle strained as the pain tore through her. Sesshomaru watched her shaking body with an expression he had likely not worn since childhood. His golden eyes were widened, his lips slightly parted. For that moment, alone and with Rin not observing him as she suffered, he was helpless and afraid.

The contraction passed and Rin's body slumped. Her breaths came easily again and her eyes drifted open wearily. By that time Sesshomaru had recovered, his jaw had tightened down; his eyes had narrowed to a more normal position. He let go of her arm and touched her hair instead, feeling the stickiness of sweat even through the thick wiry strands of it. "You will not die."

She acted as if she didn't hear him, just kept breathing, trying to recover her strength.

He repeated himself, more firmly this time. "You will not die."

Rin made a small sound, half-whimper, half-sob. "Why won't you…answer me?"

Sesshomaru paused, taken aback. "Answer you?"

She let go of his collar and instead fumbled for his hand on her hair, grabbing it with both of her own. "I wanted you to know…" her sentence was drawn out because of her panted breaths, "I love you. I always loved you." she choked a little and a few fresh tears oozed out of her eyes. "You hurt me…"

Sesshomaru pulled away from her slightly, glancing swiftly from her, as if she had suddenly become repulsive. "Do not speak of it. You must be calm."

Rin squeezed his hand fiercely and made a face, gritting and baring her teeth toward him like a dog. "It's too late!" she pulled on his hand, trying to force him to look at her again. "She's already gone…it's too soon." Rin shook her head, beginning to sob in earnest.

Sesshomaru allowed himself to look back at her now. "She is not gone."

Although she heard him, Rin didn't respond except to keep crying and repeat, "It's too soon…"

"She is hanyou." Sesshomaru said calmly, "It is not too soon."

Rin searched Sesshomaru's face with a mixture of confusion and possibly the beginnings of hope. "How can you know?"

"I can hear her heartbeat. Her scent…" his voice trailed away and he swallowed thickly once, actually analyzing the scent again just to be certain. The labor had filled the room not only with Rin's scent and her suffering, but also the scent of the child's stress. Inside it Sesshomaru's acute sense of smell could pick out growth hormones. Their daughter was more advanced than she should've been. She would be small, but she was strong, a survivor.

"She's alive." Rin's grip on his hand loosened, going slack. "She'll live?" she continued searching his face, as if he knew everything, as if he had become some sort of god as she lied there, bleeding and perhaps dying.

"She may." Sesshomaru answered, trying to control his voice. It sounded too thick. There was too much saliva in his mouth. Sesshomaru swallowed, fighting a grimace. What if he lost them both? What if Rin died and left the child…? What if Rin survived and the child did not? How could Rin survive that loss…?

As if she could read his mind, Rin squeezed his hand tightly again and asked, "If I die—you'll take care of her?"

Sesshomaru pulled his hand from her and frowned, almost growling. "You will not die."

As if to contradict his words, Rin closed her eyes again and inhaled sharply as another contraction smashed into her. Her breathing was stilted by the pain, the world vanished from her. Sesshomaru watched her, his own inner demons battling inside him. When the incapacitating pain at last passed, Rin went limp, panting.

For the fourth time, Sesshomaru repeated himself, "You will not die."

Rin struggled to open her eyes and gaze up at him. The contraction had robbed her even of the strength to shed tears. She lifted one hand up toward his face, touching his chin and then one cheek. She ran her fingertips over the red-purple streaks there. "Why…" she started slowly, "…didn't you tell me…about your wife?"

Sesshomaru scowled, "She is of no importance now."

"And your heir?" Rin continued, her voice heavy with exhaustion. "A son?"

"It is unimportant." Sesshomaru replied, evasively though his face was still twisted with his scowl.

Rin's hand on his own tightened, mashing his fingers while in the same moment avoiding his claws. "Tell me." anger had begun to creep into her voice, into her expression.

Sesshomaru's lips pursed into a tight, white line. "I could not tell you because I did not wish to harm you."

She shook her head on the pillows, nostrils flaring. The movement sent Sesshomaru a fresh rush of smells, sweat, pain, fear… "That's not enough."

His eyes narrowed angrily. "You always knew I would marry to produce heirs. You _accepted it. _And you ran away from me—to Shimofuri, my enemy." He snarled.

"You should've told me!" Rin half-shouted, but her voice faded, leaving only a hoarse rasp. "You should've waited…"

"You should never have run!" Sesshomaru hissed harshly. "To Shimofuri, to Inuyasha…"

"You deserved it." she answered, stubbornly, now trying to pull away from him, pushing his hand away, and pulling into herself.

Sesshomaru took her hands by the wrists, forcing her to stay facing him. "I have done all I can. I have avenged you."

"Avenged me?" Rin repeated, blankly. Her eyes dipped shut briefly; her muscles slackened with exhaustion briefly before she shook it off, forcing herself awake again. She pulled against his grip, trying weakly to get free.

"The miscarriages were the result of sabotage. You were poisoned at Nejiro, Rin." His tone had become one of distance and authority, regaining his composure, "I have executed all of those involved." At her confused, speculative stare, he added, "When you were away."

She turned her face away, screwing it up as a contraction hit her. Her blunt fingers dug at Sesshomaru's hand and wrist fiercely as her body was seized up by the wave of pain. Sesshomaru scented fresh blood, heard Rin's heartbeat and labored, stilted breathing. He thought of the miko and glanced toward the screen. The moonlight had passed by, now only the gloom of night remained. The baby would come soon.

Sesshomaru let go of her hands and moved away from the futon slightly, looking down at the sheets covering Rin's body below the waist. Unless he called the miko, he would have to act as a midwife or a healer himself. The idea made Sesshomaru's skin crawl, and his stomach tense and clench up, but the miko would be flustered and she would expect him to leave.

Slowly, Sesshomaru rose to his feet and walked to the door, sliding it open. The air outside was fresh and sweet smelling in comparison to the stuffy, enclosed stink of blood, suffering, and sweat. The guard stood at attention, nodding his head to acknowledge Sesshomaru's appearance. The miko was getting to her feet across the hallway, moving stiffly, as if she'd aged ten years in the time since he'd seen her last. She bowed to him, murmuring something that Sesshomaru didn't bother trying to make out.

"You." he called to the miko, "Come inside."

She obeyed following him inside and heading to Rin's bedside as her contraction passed. Sesshomaru closed the door behind her and then moved to where Rin had set up the desk where she'd been writing before. He seated himself next to the pool of black ink and watched the miko with narrowed eyes.

Rin was breathing heavily, trying to open her eyes. She mumbled and moaned Sesshomaru's name, calling to him. Sesshomaru maintained his distance, waiting for the miko to make some sort of pronouncement.

When the miko moved to pull away the sheet over Rin's lower body, she paused and then turned to face Sesshomaru, dropping into a bow. "My lord…?"

"What is it?" he answered her with open impatience.

"I must examine your lady—it is not proper for…"

"Examine her. I will remain here."

The miko hesitated, making small sounds that might've been attempts to persuade him otherwise, but she eventually turned her back on him when Rin moved, whimpering as another contraction hit her. Sesshomaru watched the miko remove the sheet and set to work, mopping up the blood with rags that were already soaked through completely. She reached between Rin's legs and then withdrew, sitting stiffly and watching as Rin fought her way through the contraction.

When it had passed, the miko moved to Rin's head and called to her, getting her attention. "It's time for you to push, my lady. I will help you sit up…"

(A/N: I have no idea traditionally how the Japanese birth babies. Today in the hospital we do the stirrups, laying the woman horizontally, but in many other cultures, and in times past, it was completely normal for a woman to give birth standing up. Now it might sound weird, but actually that's the position that is best because then gravity helps the mother and makes her job a little bit easier. Our way is more for the doctor's convenience, not the mother's. I'm going to go with the squatting idea because it would make sense gravity-wise. Culture wise…well I searched briefly, but there was nothing about position.)

The miko brought Rin into a sitting position, moving behind her for support. She pulled blankets and pillows, bunching them up to act as back support for when she would be forced to leave to Rin's legs, to tend bleeding and, eventually, to help with the actual birth. She cast wary, uncertain glances at Sesshomaru every other minute or so. The maids would've been helpful, but she didn't ask Sesshomaru if she could call them in, just kept working.

"I need you to push, my lady."

Rin might've fought her, but a contraction swept over her, making her gasp quietly and tense up. The miko called out to her, telling her to push, that it should be an instinctual urge. Rin reached out blindly, gripping the miko and the sheets, straining.

When the pain passed, Rin fell limp, still holding onto the miko. She called Sesshomaru's name weakly, repeating it more as a prayer than actually calling to him. In his place beside the pool of black ink, Sesshomaru partly turned his eyes away even as his body stiffened, readying itself instinctually to go to her. This was the one thing he couldn't save her from…

He refused to consider beyond the possibility that she would die. He hadn't apologized to her—would he ever? Sesshomaru was proud and stubborn. He shared that stubbornness with Inuyasha certainly. It wasn't truly in his nature to admit wrongdoing, most of the time. Yet if Rin died before he could speak to her privately again, her soul would depart unhappily. In the past Sesshomaru might not have believed truly in ghosts, he was as most youkai were, concerned mainly with the concretes of life—that is, what he could see and touch and kill. Souls were incorporeal and untouchable, yet he knew that they existed because of Tenseiga. If Rin died, could he ever appease her soul? Could a human's spirit haunt a guilty inuyoukai?

The labor progressed, agonizingly. Rin's contractions became almost unceasing. She strained for long seconds at a time while the miko offered her encouragement, and then she would fall silent, her body still tense and wrought with pains, but it was enough relaxation that she would call for Sesshomaru again. The miko hushed her in a raspy whisper, telling her to save her breath for the contractions.

Sesshomaru ignored them both, withdrawn and almost brooding as he waited. The thickness of the stink in the room intensified, becoming barely breathable to him.

At last the miko changed positions, moving to prop Rin into an even more upright stance. Precariously, because she was working alone, she supported Rin with one arm and shoulder while she bent forward and tried to feel for the baby's progress with her other free arm. Rin stopped trying to speak at that point, unable to focus energy into forming words at all.

And then, all at once, the baby slipped from her mother's body, half falling and half-pulled by the miko. Sesshomaru came swiftly out of his brooding; watching tensely as Rin fell limp at last and the miko let her go. The infant was hidden from Sesshomaru's view by blankets, but his acute ears told him its heart was beating, though it had yet to breathe. Trepidation swamped him—what would the child look like? A hanyou daughter, but also Sesshomaru's first child. He didn't move to see the child or grab it up, but waited with what would appear like patience when in reality it was foreboding.

The miko lifted the infant in the blankets, cleaning her. She announced the gender as she did so, she couldn't have known it wasn't necessary. "It's a girl…"

The motions of cleaning the baby made her start crying in earnest. Her cries grew in a crescendo, climbing higher. The miko looked uncertainly between Rin's exhausted, panting form and Sesshomaru, dark and silent a short ways away, and hesitated. She held their daughter, but wasn't sure who to pass the child to first, its father or its mother.

Rin made a small sound then and that made up the miko's mind for her. She passed the bundle to Rin and moved away, trying feebly to clean up and examine Rin further. She spoke seemingly to the space around the room, warning the air that there was still afterbirth to pass, and then they would have to wait and rest until the bleeding stopped. "Nurse her quickly, my lady. It will help heal you."

Sesshomaru watched Rin avidly as she laid eyes on their daughter for the first time, as her fingers dug into the blankets and exposed the baby so that she could touch her. Her crying hadn't stopped or quieted at all. Impossibly tiny fingers and feet moved briefly in and out of Sesshomaru's line of sight. Rin's face interested him most of all, the puffiness and shine of exhaustion and sweat diminished as she stared down at her long awaited daughter. Her expression was softened, glowing, the way Sesshomaru remembered seeing her after lovemaking, or when she had been pregnant for the very first time. In that moment the marks of Rin's suffering vanished, and he could see only her joy.

To disturb her to see the baby…it was unthinkable…

* * *

A/N: okay, yes I know I am absolutely horrible for leaving you all there with nothing else, not even an initial description of their new baby…so cruel, yes.

I had an excellent suggestion for a name for this little girl, and I've decided to go with it. **Saya—**_Sheath,_ as in the sheath of a sword. As it was suggested to me, and I loved this idea and it about set me on the name too, Ginrei's daughter will be named **Hanone**—_Fang._ Considering that Tetsuaiga was made from their father's fang, Saya made a lot of sense as being paired with Hanone.

That all being said, I wrote this chapter and got to the point where the baby is born and I thought oh crap, what does she look like? Originally I had always planned that genetically it'd make sense for their hanyou daughter to look a lot like Inuyasha, but with the addition of the crescent moon, or the marks on her cheeks. I'll probably still go with that, but I keep thinking…the dog ears are becoming overkill…I dunno. We'll see.


	28. Saya

A/N: My boyfriend leaves for his college today, to set up his dorm room, learn how to run his own Bible Study group, and minister at the fair up there. I'm a little nervous about it all. Last Friday my boyfriend went out to eat with these two girls that were, I guess, begging him to go with them. One of them has supposedly suffered a break up with a friend of his. My boyfriend really wanted to see his friend, but his friend always blew him off. These girls wanted to see him though, and he went out to lunch with them and then picked me up a short time later and told me about all this…well a version of it anyway. He claims, and it seemed real, that these girls just bothered him deeply. One of them tried to tell him that he should be single and he said he told her, "I have a girlfriend and that's not going to change." Though he told me about it, and though neither of these girls go to his college, it all understandably makes me nervous. Sometimes being in love, being in a relationship, sucks…a lot. Anyway, enough about me…

Disclaimer: No….no ownage.

* * *

Last Chapter: Rin was in labor, worried that she wouldn't survive. She made Yuki the miko get Sesshomaru for her. Surprisingly, Sesshomaru came into the room indeed and stayed until their daughter was born.

* * *

**Saya**

Tsukiyume didn't stay with Miroku and Sango very long. As they climbed out of the coastal lands and into the plateau that marked the beginning of the Middle Lands, their paths diverged. Miroku and Sango would skirt north, traveling along the border between the Middle Lands and the coast and into the mountains where the old demon slayer's village was.

They had begun a new community of demon slayers there. It grew slowly at first, but as Miroku and Sango's reputation as a team spread and blossomed, it had begun to attract attention. Spiritual priests and mikos, other demon slayers of all kinds. The village that had raised Sango up as a girl could never be remade truly, but it was still, nevertheless, something for the couple to be immensely proud of.

Shippo parted ways with Miroku and Sango as well, choosing to escort Tsukiyume until she'd reached the safety of her brother's castle.

The journey took several days at a leisurely pace. Shippo and Tsukiyume took to staying out in the nights, under the stars—until it began to rain of course. At last they reached the castle town Sakaime. It was a border town, caught between the Isei, the Nanka of the Middle Lands, and the Western Lands. The palace inside the town was often controlled by different warlords for various purposes, but the people of the town considered themselves as part of the Middle Lands. When there were no other lords residing in their midst, they would be loyal to Shimofuri and Sasugainu.

Sakaime, however, was different from when Tsukiyume had last entered it. The town was quiet and ominous. Humans were skittish and watchful. When they spotted Shippo and Tsukiyume—who were both noticeably not human—they hurried away, hiding in their homes or darting away into alleys. The businesses and marketplaces were mostly closed. When Shippo attempted to speak to one man, peddling fresh fruit on the street, he jabbered in Japanese that was so accented he was nearly impossible to understand. Shippo gave up and continued walking where Tsukiyume instructed.

They reached the wall guarding the palace. There were guards before it, watching Tsukiyume and Shippo approach suspiciously. As they came closer, one of the men gestured to his partner and muttered something under his breath. If Tsukiyume and Shippo had been human, they never would've heard the words, but with their acute ears, both hanyou and kitsune heard it clearly as the guard spoke. "What do we have here? Defectors?"

"Defectors?" Shippo blinked, stopping short and glancing to Tsukiyume. "What are they talking about?"

Tsukiyume scowled. "They must think I'm a boy too." For the journey she had tied her hair back messily and her clothes had deteriorated. It would be hard, from a distance, for humans to tell her gender. Youkai hair lengths didn't matter as far as gender went of course, whether the men had seen Tsukiyume's hair or not didn't matter.

"But…defectors?" Shippo's face twisted with consternation, "What are we defecting from? We're just kids…"

Tsukiyume's ears flattened, she pursed her lips, and strode forward without hesitation. The guards stiffened up, watching her and waiting. When she'd come a few steps closer, Tsukiyume stopped and shouted to the men, "I am Tsukiyume, Lord Shimofuri's sister."

The guards were unimpressed. The same man that had whispered the first time, now shouted openly at her. "And what proof might you have?"

"Is Lord Shimofuri inside?" Tsukiyume asked, still shouting.

The guard guffawed obnoxiously. "Shimofuri is in the Nanka, hiding. If he was here, I'd say he had a death wish."

Tsukiyume paused, frowningly, trying to think about what their words meant. Shimofuri might've chosen not to inhabit this castle anyway, but the guard's words told her that something massive had happened since she'd last been in Sakaime.

There was a small puff of air on her cheek that ruffled her hair and popped her ears. She turned, blinkingly, and saw that Shippo had appeared at her side. They faced the gate and the guards now side by side. "What are those idiots saying?" he asked.

"My brother isn't here. Something's happened to this town…"

"Well," Shippo smirked, "We'll just have to ask them."

Before Tsukiyume could as much as blink, Shippo had disappeared again, sending her ears popping and her hair flying. He reappeared between the guards, but he wasn't Shippo anymore outwardly, though he still had a tawny fox tail curled behind him. He stood between the guards as a beautiful woman in a short kimono that hung open a little too much at the front, exposing the roundness of breasts.

Tsukiyume covered her face with her hands, caught between horror and embarrassment.

The men were startled, they moved backward, gapingly. "What the…?"

"Hi." Shippo crooned, looking between them. His voice impersonations had gotten better with age. Though Tsukiyume refused to look at him, she could still hear him clearly and his voice was high pitch and demure, helpless. "I'm a little lost and confused, I'm afraid. I need some big strong men to tell me what's going on around here and…where I should go to find Lord Shimofuri?"

The men were dazed, baffled. But also adding to their befuddlement was the fact that, with age and experience, Shippo's transformations had gained a sort of hypnotic factor. In the past he needed the element of surprise to convince his enemies that he was really whatever shape he'd taken on. Now he could convince anyone, even if they'd actually _seen_ him magically appear before them, that he was real. With every passing year he was growing more and more powerful.

The man that had been mostly quiet before bought the deception first. "Well my lady, Lord Sesshomaru's army came through here and into the Hokubo about a week ago. A contingent was left here—us, I mean, a human contingent—to watch over this spot." He grinned stupidly, his eyes drifting to the halfway exposed breasts while physically he gestured out toward Tsukiyume, "If that thing out there really is Shimofuri's sister we'll take her hostage and hand her over to our superiors."

"Is that so?" Shippo replied in a high, sing-song voice. "What would that Sesshomaru do without big strong, loyal men like you around…"

"Akio!" the other man hissed, "Shut your trap! We don't know…" he shook his head, swaying dizzily. "Don't you hear the way this bitch talks?" he faced Shippo directly with a glare, "_Lord_ Shimofuri? And she gave Lord Sesshomaru no title at all, as if she knows him personally! Not even his wife would do that!" he grabbed Shippo by the shoulders, "Just where are your loyalties, lady?"

Shippo grinned nervously. "Gotta go!" he vanished with a _pop_ from the guard's grasp and reappeared at Tsukiyume's side, still wearing his disguise. "Run Tsuki!"

They turned back the way they'd come and ran into the street. The heavy footsteps of one of the guards followed after them, as did his shouts for help. Fortunately for Tsukiyume and Shippo, the man was only human of course, they outran him swiftly and mere minutes later, panting harshly, they were outside Sakaime, looking back on it.

"Phew! I'm glad we got out of that one!" Shippo was still grinning and wearing his disguise. He was bent over and holding his knees. The breasts he'd assumed hung nearly out of his skimpy kimono.

Tsukiyume, also panting, turned her face away though she was laughing. She was fairly certain that Shippo had kept the disguise purposefully to see her response, and to make her laugh. "Shippo! I can see your…"

"Oh!" he stood upright and wiggled and the woman's form rippled on him like water before falling away like a layer of dust. He sneezed once and then wiped his nose with one arm, sniffling. "I think I'm allergic to men. Those guards had bad breath."

"Please tell me you didn't kiss them!" Tsukiyume laughed.

The kit grinned at her, though he was blushing as red as Inuyasha's haori. "Well, you should've been watching to save me if one of them had tried!"

They set out on the road again, noting how few other travelers there were. "Sesshomaru must've gone to war." Tsukiyume remarked, darkly. "Rin made him promise but…it was too late." Her ears drooped; her face was dark with worry and fear for her brother.

"Those guards seemed to think Shimofuri was still alive." Shippo told her, quietly. "I think that's true. I think Sesshomaru kept his promise. The army might've moved out, but the countryside isn't on fire or anything…"

Tsukiyume sighed heavily and looked up at the overcast, gray sky. It was always threatening to rain lately. Thunder rumbled somewhere in the distance, echoing off the trees and hills. "I hope you're right, Shippo. Without my brother…what would happen to me? I'd be all alone…" she sniffled, fighting tears at the thought of losing the last of her family.

"You still have an uncle, right? And…" he moved closer to her and nuzzled into her side, taking her hand. "I'll always be here, you're fun to travel with, and I love traveling."

She smiled thoughtfully and nodded slowly. "Thanks Shippo."

* * *

The miko worked around the room, seemingly forgetting that Sesshomaru was there. Rin might've forgotten too, for the first time in her entire life. Only the new life suckling at her chest mattered. The world had shrunken down to her daughter's tiny, but powerful, mesmerizing presence. Sesshomaru watched his mate lift shaking fingers to stroke their child as she suckled, he saw the quavering, but ecstatic smile spread widely over her face.

The afterbirth passed and the miko hurriedly dealt with it, wrapping it up with the other bloodied rags. She left the room to remove it from the whole of the castle. When she returned Sesshomaru still hadn't moved from his spot, though Rin was beginning to drift into sleep or unconsciousness. The baby had stopped suckling and had fallen asleep with her mother's nipple still in her little mouth.

Rin barely stirred as the miko took the baby from her and closed her robe to protect her modesty. The futon was ruined, soiled with birth fluids and blood, but for now Rin would be too exhausted to move, so she would have to sleep on it. She continued to bleed, and would for some time. It was entirely possible that she could die, losing too much blood and strength from the birth.

Yuki held the baby for a time, uncertainly. Rin fell into a deep, motionless sleep, perhaps never to wake again. Labor was an unpredictable thing. It might kill in the midst of the child's birth, it might kill immediately after from bleeding, or it might kill with infection days, or weeks later. There was no way to tell Rin's fate yet, and even the child, no matter how strongly she suckled and breathed now, could die abruptly in her sleep. Babies were so fragile, so new—as a miko she'd always been told that they could easily shirk off their physical selves and return back to the watery spirit world, back into the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth.

At last she rose to her feet and moved cautiously to sit before Sesshomaru. She bowed awkwardly, trying not to jostle the infant. "Lord Sesshomaru."

Though she didn't see his face, she did see Sesshomaru's knees before her move, shifting slightly on his haunches, as if coming awake out of a dream or from sleep. "What of Rin?" he demanded, sounding strangely as if she had offended him somehow.

"She has finished the labor, my lord." The baby in the miko's arms, alarmed at the change in position and still very new to gravity, made small mewling sounds, warning the adults that she was perhaps about to cry.

"She will live?" He demanded, impatiently.

Yuki risked glancing up at him. The nighttime was beginning to fade away. The nearest window brought in bluish light to suffuse the room and color the inuyoukai lord's face. His expression was tense, tight, but he wasn't looking at her, he was staring past her at Rin's motionless body. It wasn't impatience so much as it was worry, she realized.

"The bleeding has yet to stop, my lord."

His lips narrowed, but his eyes softened. "She will live." He repeated, but this time the words weren't a question, but a statement. Yuki wondered how certain he was, and if her life still depended on both infant and mother surviving the ordeal.

"My lord…" Yuki shuffled forward until she was nearly within arm's length, and then extended the blanketed bundle toward him. "The child…"

When she was set on the floor away from the miko's body heat, the baby began at once to wriggle and squirm. Tiny fingers pawed at the air, searching instinctually for something to grasp onto. She began to make choking noises that grew steadily into cries. Sesshomaru pulled his gaze away from Rin and slowly lowered it to the helpless shape at his feet.

Yuki watched stiffly, remembering Rin's words before she'd given birth: "_He's never wanted a child with me."_ Those words had made Yuki hesitant in bringing the baby to the inuyoukai. What if Rin had been telling the truth? What if Sesshomaru had no interest in the child, even perhaps wished it hadn't survived? Would he kill it? At the same time she was thrown into doubt—he had told her if Rin or the baby died that _she_ would die as well for failing. His behavior currently indicated little interest in the baby…

The baby was crying in earnest now, long indrawn breaths released in loud wails. The child's cries drew no motion from Rin. She had fallen into unconsciousness, lost to the world and to her brand new daughter and awkward, estranged mate.

Sesshomaru eyed the infant almost as if she were something that might need to be squashed, a possible threat, something that offended him. Yet that expression rippled on his face, changing as the crying increased.

Yuki, growing nervous at the crying, reached back to take the infant into her arms.

"Do not touch her." Sesshomaru ordered her, gruffly. His voice had grown thick.

Obediently Yuki apologized and scooted back from the baby and from the inuyoukai. She glanced over her shoulder at Rin, worriedly. When she looked back, she saw that Sesshomaru had at last reached out and was probing the bundle almost cautiously. Tentatively he turned her around to face him and then stared down at her, his face expressionless.

"She is very strong, my lord." Yuki murmured, trying to keep her nervousness out of her voice.

Sesshomaru ignored her. With his only hand, he pulled almost daintily at the blankets wrapped around her, exposing her body to the relative chill of the room.

"My lord—she is a newborn." Yuki protested at once, reaching out as if to stop him, "She cannot yet maintain her own body temperature, she must be kept warm…"

"Silence." He half-barked at her over his daughter's shrill crying.

Yuki bit her lip and turned her eyes to the ceiling, she wrung her hands helplessly in her lap.

Without the blanket to warm her, the baby curled tightly into herself and her crying quieted slightly. Her eyes were squeezed tightly closed. Sesshomaru's clawed; dangerous hand hovered over her tiny face and body, so small she could almost fit in his single palm. Cautiously Sesshomaru touched the baby, brushing her hair and feeling her head. The baby reacted at once to his touch, reaching out with startling coordination and grasping his pinky finger. Her fingertips were sharp with tiny claws.

Her crying stopped, though she remained tightly curled in a fetal position. Her eyes opened in narrow slits, they moved beyond the lids, searchingly though she was far too young to be seeing anything let alone understanding what it was she saw.

She was his spitting image, completely captivating. It was no wonder Rin had forgotten he was inside the room as she held their daughter. The baby's hair was downy and fair, as bright as his own with no trace of her mother's ebony black. Her fingertips had claws, she hadn't been born with dog ears, but as Sesshomaru brushed her downy hair—still wet from birth—out of the way, he saw her ears were rounded like a human's, not pointed as his own. On her forehead there was a strange discoloration, a darkening of the skin that made Sesshomaru think of a scar. It was the crescent moon, not yet developed and showing fully.

He had feared for the longest time that he and Rin would have a hanyou that would—inevitably—look and act just like Inuyasha. Loud and obnoxious, and with those infernally adorable ears on its head. The child before him now looked every bit as if her mother had been an inuyoukai woman, not a mere mortal at all. Only time would tell if this hanyou daughter would adopt mannerisms like her obnoxious uncle, but with her appearance, Sesshomaru doubted it was possible…

Tucking the blanket back around her, Sesshomaru then delicately scooped her up into his arm and tucked her against his chest. As she quieted, ceasing all crying and almost at once falling asleep, Sesshomaru glanced at Rin again, still motionless except for her breathing, on the soiled futon.

Rin didn't appear to be about to wake up anytime soon, but Sesshomaru remained uncomfortable with the thought of leaving her—especially with taking the child with him. She would need to nurse again, and although the miko would be willing of course to take care of the baby for him in that respect, Sesshomaru despised the thought of handing over his new daughter to the miko without supervision.

"Miko." He called to her. She bowed low immediately as he went on. "You will watch over Rin. When she has healed enough to be moved, you will summon me to her."

"My lord," the miko began nervously, "The child will need to nurse every few hours…"

"She will be my responsibility." He interjected, sounding almost irritable.

The miko bowed. "Yes, my lord."

As she turned away, Sesshomaru shifted, setting the baby inside her blankets onto his lap. With some difficulty, he loosened the sash on his haori. There were two layers on the top, and the collar had been stained with Rin's blood. Sesshomaru opened both layers and then pulled his single arm through the sleeve, as if he were about to take the entire haori off, but instead he took hold of his newborn daughter and pulled her inside the haori and pushed his arm back through the sleeve. He tightened the sashes again to keep her from slipping down or out, and rose to his feet. Without a second arm he was forced to find other ways of carrying this helpless newborn around. He needed his arm to open doors or perhaps handle a weapon…

He rose to his feet and moved to the door, pausing only briefly to glance back at the miko and Rin where she lied without moving, deathly calm with exhaustion. Her face was horribly pale and shiny with sweat. Sesshomaru felt a jolt of alarm for a moment, but buried it swiftly and passed out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

* * *

She found him lying on the bed on his back, holding the book she'd given to him awkwardly above his head. The lighting was dim; the hanyou was squinting with concentration and effort. Yet, when he noted her presence in the doorway he shut the book and pushed it away hurriedly, as if it had bitten him.

"What?" he snapped, as if she'd already made some impossible demand, inconveniencing him.

"Are you enjoying it?" Kagome asked, cautiously. She held a rag, dirtied and stained. She wiped her hands clean as she spoke. Originally she'd only wanted to find Inuyasha to tell him that she was about to leave to go to her mother's to visit with her grandfather and to keep close with their children, but seeing what he was doing she couldn't resist asking.

"Feh." He scoffed, ignoring the question completely. "Are you done out there?"

"What do you mean?" she blinked, uncertainly. She'd been cleaning before, trying to use the work to keep herself from worrying about Inuyasha, about Koinu, or Akisame or her grandfather…

He sat up, ears folding back and his face transforming into a glare. "All that racket you were making with the dishes and pots and whatever the hell else…" he stopped and made a small noise in the back of his throat that Kagome couldn't interpret before blurting, "What's the matter with you?"

Again Kagome blinked, taken aback. "What? Nothing…"

"Normally you come and badger and nag me when I—" he stopped, his face screwing up with frustration, "What do you call it? _Putting?_"

Kagome caught on at last and laughed, feeding him the correct word. "_Pouting._"

"Feh." He grumbled, "Whatever."

Smiling, Kagome crossed her arms over her chest and regarded her husband with fresh amusement. "I thought you wanted some alone time—but if I'd known you wanted me to come after you…what, did you want me to beg?"

"No!" Inuyasha rumbled immediately.

"Well, what did you want?"

The hanyou opened his mouth as if to speak but then paused and his face blanked, uncertainty lit the golden eyes. At last, as he caught Kagome's expectant, amused stare, he closed his mouth and scoffed stubbornly. "Nothing!"

Kagome moved toward him, still smiling, but the hanyou scowled and demanded, "What are you doing?"

He expected her to touch him, but Kagome surprised him, moving instead to grab the book from the other side of their bed and flip through it, trying to find the spots where Inuyasha's claws had dug into the corners of the pages where he'd hold it open to read. She stopped and examined a few of the pages, squinting through the dark to make out the characters.

"What the hell?" Inuyasha reached out and snatched the book from her, closing it. "Go back to rattling the pots in the kitchen, wench!"

Kagome ignored his griping and smirked at him. "You were reading about the Greeks."

"The who?" he snapped defensively, crossing his arms over his chest.

"The Greeks. The founders of Western Society."

Growling, Inuyasha reached out for the book. "Give me that…"

Kagome pulled it clear of his claws, smirking proudly. "What was that, Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha's ears folded back, his eyes narrowed dangerously, "Dammit woman!" he knew full well that she was taunting him, but Inuyasha was helpless to resist the teasing. To let her know he was interested in what she'd given him to read was unthinkable. He was pouting, it was true, but he wasn't ready to give in—not like this. "Don't make me…"

"You know I can't understand you when you growl like that, honey." Kagome murmured sweetly, bringing the book down to a point that he could reach easily again, taunting him.

Inuyasha, helplessly, reached for the book again, lunging this time. His fingers grazed the smooth cover before Kagome managed to pull it back. "That's it!" He got up, snatching her with one hand to keep her still while reaching around her with the other, trying to snatch the book from her. "Hand it over, Kagome."

She squeaked, turning and squirming, trying to get away from him, but Inuyasha was fast and strong and, with minimal effort, pried it away from her. Irritably, he moved away from her and slid the closet door open, pushing the book roughly inside and closing the door after it. When he turned back to her, Kagome had crossed her arms, the mirth vanishing from her face. Inuyasha's ears came forward and then backward uncertainty. "Feh…"

"Why are you so difficult, Inuyasha?" Kagome demanded, frowning.

Ah, yes, that was what he'd been waiting for, Kagome's anger. That was normal behavior.

"If you don't like it—bitch—why did you marry me?" he glowered back at her, triumphantly. For a moment he felt color come to his cheeks, a long-instilled caution brought on by the presence of young, innocent ears. Yet just as quickly his ears took in the silence of the house and he remembered that Koinu and Akisame were away, tucked safely away from his foul mouth in the future.

Kagome's hands curled into fists and she groaned. "Inuyasha!"

"Wish you could still say _sit?_" he grinned deviously and picked absently at the breads around his neck. The spell hadn't been used in years, lost when Kaede had died and unused even before that. Inuyasha still acted up occasionally, but Kagome had relinquished that control over him when they had joined as mates.

"No—I'm just going to leave." Kagome started to move past him, but Inuyasha's hand shot out, snatching her forearm and stopping her short.

"Where are you going?" the tone she'd used told him that it wasn't just to the kitchen.

"To my mother's, I want to be with Koinu and Aki." She said it without looking at him.

"You can't go without me." Inuyasha's voice was startled, almost alarmed.

"I'm not stopping you from coming." She sighed, looking helplessly toward the ceiling. "But would you please…" her voice trailed off as she froze, feeling Inuyasha's lips and nose against her neck. When she'd looked up she'd exposed the skin there and the hanyou had gone in. He breathed in deeply, and his exhalation tickled her skin. His hold on her arm loosened, shifting to her waist, slipping around it with the ease of his long years of experience.

"Inuyasha…" she murmured, her voice dropping lower with the first rippling of desire.

The hanyou responded with his usual charm and charisma. "You need a bath."

Irritation made Kagome open her mouth to protest, but Inuyasha moved faster, covering her lips with his own with surprising hunger and force. Faced with this assault, Kagome forgot his insult and melted into him, accepting his kiss, tasting the inside of his mouth, the sinewy smooth wetness of his tongue.

When he pulled away from her and pressed his lips fiercely to her neck again, Kagome smiled faintly as she stepped in to wrap her arms around his waist, pulling him closer. "I thought you wanted to go visit my mother…"

He was breathing deeply, panting as if he were in a battle with some rampaging youkai that needed to feel Tetsusaiga's wind scar. Inuyasha didn't stop attacking her neck and what he could expose of her chest just to answer her, which meant that his words were muffled when he spoke. "In a while."

Kagome started to talk again, though her words were deep and partly moaned, but Inuyasha robbed her of the words by slipping his clawed hands underneath her robe and reaching upward, cupping her breasts. When she hiccupped with a mixture of pleasure and surprise, she caught Inuyasha's golden eyes smirking up at her, warm and mischievous.

Two could play that game…

* * *

Rin hovered in a world of memories and darkness. She was trapped inside her own mind, trapped by her physical weakness.

Snatches of the real world reached her, lights, sounds, or sensations. Rin shrunk from them, overwhelmed and weak. Her body when she moved was heavy in a way she had experienced only a few times in her life, in the brief moments before death claimed her. Rin was perhaps the only human being to have escaped death, after actually having entered the realm, several times. The quiet and peace of that realm often touched her, clawing at her—but then there would be a tiny, warm mouth at her breast, jolting her back. Sometimes the jolt came from food or water given to her by the priestess.

An unknown amount of passed her by, whether it was hours, days, or weeks Rin would never know for sure inside her own mind. She knew the changing shades of light, the passage of the milky moon outside the screens and slats of her window.

In the deepest place in her delirium, Rin found herself as a girl again. She was hiding inside the Jouka palace, curled into a ball, sobbing. Sesshomaru had just left her behind there, with her teachers and the human maids. Humanity was strange and foreign to her, and to compound those troubles, she'd discovered that she was bleeding. She had no knowledge of menstruation, and the maids had spent several hours trying to comfort her and to explain the bleeding.

But in this place of hazy dream-memory, it wasn't the maids that came after Rin. Instead there was a chorus of other voices, male and female, adult and child, calling out her name, whispering inside her ear. The room was dark but there were shapes that hovered around her, moving like spirits through the air and through the walls. Rin whimpered, but in the physical world her breath was too weak to make the sound at all.

One voice at last stood out from the others. A shape materialized before her. It was female, wearing a loose kimono that only reached her thighs as well as coarse gray peasant's pants. The woman called Rin's name, sobbingly, and reached out for her.

Rin recoiled, calling out Sesshomaru's name for help. Her words barely registered in her ears at all, not above the calls of the ghosts, the incorporeal shadows hanging about her in the memory-room.

Though she tried to escape, the shape touched her and seemed to solidify. It became a woman wearing a dark purple kimono. Her hair was more brown than black, and it was wild and unruly in a way that Rin recognized. Her eyes were a dark earthy brown. When she spoke Rin froze, her body becoming heavy. "My daughter…"

"Daughter?" Rin answered her, choking on her own sobs as well as her shock and fear.

The ghost didn't answer, but in the same moment more shapes appeared around her. A man, muscular and strong, with the sleeves cut clear from his robe and a wide sunhat on his head. There were smaller shapes as well, a boy younger than she had been when Sesshomaru had rescued her, and another that was older, lither and lanky. They spoke in her ears, whispering, but their words were indistinct to Rin, like ocean waves breaking over the sand. She lost the spirits; they slipped away, back into the incorporeal darkness.

And then a different, powerful force smashed into her, solidifying before her. A dark arm shot out, snatching her by the throat.

Rin's body froze while her spirit panicked, bucking, fighting the touch of the other creature.

There were other shapes as well, shadowy but powerful, radiating hostility. Rin caught their faces out of the corner of her eye. They loomed huge, massively tall. The room wasn't big enough to contain them, nothing was. They had blue or white streaks over their cheeks—they were inuyoukai.

"Little bitch." The ghost gripping her snarled with a voice like the rasping of fall leaves. "Sesshomaru's bitch."

One of the others growled out something as well. "She is mortal, Seiyo. Take her soul, punish Sesshomaru."

"This is for my daughter, my sons, my mates—our clan…" the creature before her tightened his grip on her and Rin felt her body become weightless, her head growing dizzy, and a terrible, crushing weight on her neck that spread into her chest. She couldn't breathe, but she was too weak to fight, and the creatures in front of her were too massive, too powerful…

The room filled abruptly with light, bright and golden. "Leave the innocent alone."

The dark shapes withdrew cringingly from the light. One of them hissed out a title that had over the centuries become a most infamous name: "_Inutaisho…"_

Weight returned to Rin, the crushing sensation vanished as fast as it had come, leaving only exhaustion and the overwhelming feeling of sadness.

"It is not her time." The same voice spoke that had saved her and filled the room with light. Rin longed to crane her neck around to search for the source but she didn't have the strength.

"She has cheated death!" one of the dark creatures hissed.

"She has." The other answered calmly, "But she is not meant to be used as a tool for your vengeance."

The raspy voice spoke, cursing. "_Damn you!"_

The shapes dissembled rapidly, rushing into each other, many colors flowing together wildly. The room vanished from Rin's sight and she fell into a deep, still, dreamless sleep.

* * *

Yuki watched over the inuyoukai's mortal lover religiously. She barely ate, barely slept. Her life was tied up with the other woman's fate. She had no illusions of Sesshomaru suddenly coming to understand that she had no real control over the higher powers, over whether or not the gods decided to take his lover to the afterlife. Mostly she prayed that Rin would recover on her own, that the wide and powerful universe would see fit to spare Rin and through her Yuki as well.

The first two days were the hardest. Rin stayed unconscious, barely moving. Her bleeding continued for some time, but it had slowed. Fewer and fewer rags were soiled until eventually there was nothing at all. Rin remained deathly pale, but when Yuki tried to prop her up so she could eat and drink the young woman had enough energy to take what was given to her and swallow. When wakened she was also able to return to consciousness, though it was deliriously.

Odd as she thought it was, Yuki watched Sesshomaru return every few hours to pass her the infant. Yuki would hold the baby close to one of Rin's breasts below a sheet to preserve the other woman's modesty even while she slept, and let the child nurse until Sesshomaru called for the child back. Sometimes Sesshomaru paused in the room, keeping his daughter tucked inside his haori and watching Rin from a safe distance, other times he didn't wait at all and only vanished to skulk elsewhere in the castle.

At last Rin began to recover and Yuki breathed a small sigh of relief. When Sesshomaru brought their daughter into the room to be fed, Rin held the infant, stroking the tiny baby's silky hair, touching the crescent moon that had begun to stand out prominently on the infant's forehead. She tired quickly, but there were no fevers, and as another day or so passed, she began to be more and more reluctant to give up the baby when the nursing had finished.

There was a tension between them, but Yuki worked to ignore it and pretend that she hadn't noticed it. She had no idea how inuyoukai liked to settle their grudges, but she was certain that she didn't really want to find out.

* * *

Traditionally seven days would pass before a child was named. Rin and Sesshomaru's hanyou daughter was named a week late. Sesshomaru watched over their daughter but didn't name her. Fathers usually held final jurisdiction over their children's fate, particularly over the boys. Yet Sesshomaru wasn't human, and youkai didn't follow human tradition to the letter. Sesshomaru's father, for example, had named Inuyasha minutes after he was born, not seven days later. To Sesshomaru his daughter was a strange gift, a fragile, dream-like blessing. He didn't consider naming her, especially not without Rin.

When Rin was able to walk, however shakily once again, she began holding their daughter, almost possessively. Sesshomaru didn't fight her, but he stayed at her side, ready to take their child back as soon as Rin tired herself out.

Two weeks after the birth and the rains had stopped, yielding sunshine at last. The skies were partly cloudy, the wind had picked up, keeping the air pleasant and cool. Rin escaped the stuffy, musty atmosphere of the Insen while her futon was hauled out and a new one was brought in. Sesshomaru accompanied her, though he walked behind her some distance, almost warily. It was one of the only times in Rin's life that he had taken that position and maintained it purposefully. Usually he was always a leader, never a follower.

The pine trees on the steep mountainside shook in the wind, sighing and whispering. Rin walked with her feet bare except for the white socks over her small, delicate feet. They stood around her like giants, menacing her. When she turned to glance back at Sesshomaru, she found that he was watching her without looking away, without wavering. The wind picked at his hair, pushing it around this way and that. Rin's own was tied away tightly, but the wind caught it as well, pulling at the edges, setting a few rogue strands flying. Their daughter huddled in her blankets, whimpering when the wind touched her. She blinked against it; wide innocent eyes the same shade as her father's, a beautiful honeyed amber.

"Sesshomaru." Rin called, barely speaking his name aloud as she turned back to face the wind and the rise and fall of the mountains, hills, and cliffs in the distance. Far away she could see and smell faintly the stink of fires, of human hearths and human civilization.

Before she'd turned to look, Rin sensed his presence at her side, just behind her. He didn't speak, but she knew he was listening.

"What will you call your heir?"

He took a small breath inward, the only sign that he'd heard her at all—but it was enough. It was as good as a gasp coming from the stoic, powerful ruler. "It is not important. Do not—"

Their daughter's crying cut him off. The tiny baby kicked and squirmed, scratching vainly at the air with her tiny but already powerful claws. Rin frowned and turned back toward the Insen, only to run squarely into Sesshomaru. He steadied her instantly, keeping her from falling backward. Rin blinked, startled at how close he was to her. She tried to take a step backward but Sesshomaru's grip held her firmly in place.

"Sesshomaru…" she had stopped giving him a title, which was unthinkably bold considering she was nothing but a human, not even born properly of nobility. Yet while Sesshomaru would've killed anyone else that dared be so insolent, Rin was, at least for the time, exempt.

"Rin." His voice was deep and his gaze was narrowed with what might've been anger, but it was too complex for Rin to read in her fatigue and with their daughter's crying ringing in her ears. "You knew I would take a wife. You must forget this, it is not important."

Abruptly, Rin found herself fighting tears. Frantically she tried to step away from Sesshomaru, but his grip was firm and unyielding. "It's important to me! While I was being poisoned you left me to make your heir—you kept it secret! You _lied…_"

There was a light in his eyes, growing, a red tint of rage. "_You left with my enemy."_

Rin stammered, half shaking her head as if to deny his words, while at the same time being torn apart by their child's cries. "You _lied_ to me! You took Tsuki from Lord Shimofuri and used her like a maid. You killed an entire clan to force your wife to…"

"Silence!" Sesshomaru shouted, nearly barking straight into her face. Rin felt the puff of his hot breath on her cheeks and cringed, her body stiffening as if readying for an attack.

In spite of his order, there wasn't silence. The baby's crying had grown several decibels, becoming barely bearable. If not for her crying, Rin might've spoken again, and Sesshomaru might've continued to try and silence her, but their shouting could never silence the child. Hearing the baby's desperation, Sesshomaru released Rin's arm and stepped backward, though he refused to take his eyes from both mother and daughter.

"Comfort her."

Rin glared at him but did it without word, rocking the infant and cooing at her. When that didn't work she sighed, realizing that the baby was hungry yet again. "I must go back inside, she's hungry."

Rin walked past Sesshomaru, her posture defeated, her steps tired and dragging. Sesshomaru didn't appear as if he would stop her or add anything else to her conclusion, but then he turned, faster than the eye could follow, and snatched her shoulder again, gently, to catch her attention. "Rin."

She stopped, her shoulders drooping and sighed, "Yes, Lord Sesshomaru?"

"You left with my enemy—and with my _child."_

Of all of the things Sesshomaru could've said to her, this was the single most powerful, convincing thing of all. Never before had Sesshomaru referred to the babies she carried as _his,_ they were always _hers,_ as if she conceived them and carried and lost them alone, as if _she_ was the only one that desired them. Now, for the first time, he had spoken of their baby as belonging to him. He had claimed their daughter at long last.

Rin blinked viciously, fighting sudden tears. "Sesshomaru-sama…" her voice wavered almost childishly.

"Feed her." He barked, gruffly.

Rin's back was to him, she was facing the path that lead up the mountainside and to the Insen with its stuffy rooms, molding tatami mats and stale air. She moved slowly, pulling at the hem of her kimono with one arm and then lifting their daughter partially inside her robes. The baby began nursing hungrily without the slightest pause. She pawed at her mother's breast gently, avoiding the use of her claws.

A surge of fatigue swept over Rin, making her knees shake slightly. She fought it off, trying to steady her voice to speak over the wind to Sesshomaru one last time. "When will Sesshomaru-sama's heir be born?" she swallowed thickly, trying to keep her shoulders from shaking. "He is my daughter's younger brother after all…"

There was a pause, and for a time Rin was certain Sesshomaru would just ignore her question, but at the last moment he answered her almost softly, "Soon—the child is female. They are sisters. She will be called Hanone."

"Sisters?" Rin repeated shaking. "Hanone?"

"Yes." Sesshomaru answered coldly. He stepped past her, moving almost with exaggerated slowness. "You will name this infant _Saya."_

Rin watched his broad back as he moved away, taking his time. As the baby stopped suckling and fell quiet, Rin tried to close her robe again and moved carefully up the hill, as quickly as her exhausted feet would carry her. "Saya." She tested the name and watched her daughter's innocent, sleeping face. She might've had other names for their daughter, but Saya was a good name and well-chosen for the baby that had survived Rin's heartbreak, the travel and the early birth. And the fact that this was Sesshomaru's chosen name pleased her—it was another sign that he had claimed the child at last. Hanyou or not he would love her and raise her…

* * *

A/N: well I feel like that sucked but oh well. I'm adjusting to this new computer and the dorm room and all that, so my time and my ability to write has gone way down. But I hope this chapter (it didn't seem to want to END!!) will help make up for it…And BTW if you were confused, as I'm afraid i might not be writing up to my normal standards this time around, when Rin hovered in the room half dreaming half dead, the creatures that came to her were the spirits of the deceased Nishiyori clan, AKA Ginrei's dead family. Seiyo was her father if you recall. Also, before that, Rin was visited by her parents and brothers. 


	29. A Courtly Dance

A/N: our dry spell seemingly has at last broken!! Oh happiness! We had a thunderstorm and then it rained for a while again today. I was told by my roommate that she walked back from class in the rain and saw the sprinklers watering the lawns while it was raining. Great use of water, good thing we don't live in a desert.

Disclaimer: I only own my original characters really; I do not own the Inuyasha characters, of course. I'm just a poor college student.

Last chapter: Rin recovered slowly from labor. Sesshomaru had a good look at their daughter for the first time, almost his spitting image. He took care of the baby while Rin was out of it. Rin dipped into the spirit world briefly, seeing her dead family and then the spirits of the inuyoukai from Ginrei's clan. When she had recovered a bit she and Sess began to quarrel a little again but it has become clear that Sesshomaru has accepted their daughter, and he gave her a name, Saya. Inuyasha and Kagome made up, kinda by accident. Shippo and Tsukiyume are trying to understand what's happened in the Middle Lands while they've been away.

* * *

**A Courtly Dance**

Another two weeks passed before Sesshomaru decided to take Rin out of the Insen and take her back to the small palace where she'd been trained and partly raised: Jouka. In the intervening time that they'd spent in the Insen, Sesshomaru had tried to remain distant from Rin. He had many logical reasons, not wishing to upset her, letting her bond with Saya, or letting her recover her strength. Yet the real reason was simple and undeniable to them both.

Staying away from her was harder than it sounded. The Insen was small and Rin's scent was everywhere within it. Though priests were brought in to purify the castle and the room where Rin had labored, it was all pretense as far as Sesshomaru was concerned. The room continued to smell like Rin's sweat and blood to his sensitive nose. Saya was the other draw. His response to the infant was complex, but powerful. He had never considered himself fatherly—no one probably would—but the instincts were there, unquestionably. When her cries rang through the castle walls and hallways, Sesshomaru stiffened, as if he were preparing for battle, to defend the baby. If she didn't quiet quickly he was often tempted to seek Rin and the baby out to try and solve the problem himself.

The day that they set out for Jouka on was another windy, cool summer day. Already the heat seemed to have vanished, though it was not even August. The sun poked over grayish clouds and then just as quickly vanished behind them again, as if it was playing hide and seek with the earth far below. The grass was a lush green from the recent rains, though already in some areas leaves were beginning to turn, their tips yellowing.

Saya was a fussy baby. She squalled for some time when they set out, unused to the motions of walking for so long. Sesshomaru paused several times and glanced back at Rin with what almost amounted to a scowl. Saya's screams would attract enemies, youkai and human alike. A baby was an easy, delightful prey for any hungry youkai.

At dusk on the first day, rainclouds moved in. As the first fat raindrops began to careen down on them, Sesshomaru led Rin into the thickness of the woods, letting the trees shelter her. Surprisingly Saya had fallen quiet, probably sleeping inside her bundle of blankets and robes. Beside a thick fir tree, Sesshomaru stopped with his back to Rin and motioned with his single hand toward the tree. "Rest here."

Rin took the suggestion and pushed aside the fir's branches, slipping neatly inside. She was shivering fiercely, though she held her jaw tightly shut to keep her teeth from chattering. Sesshomaru noticed the jerky movements of her shoulders as she cuddled Saya, trying to nurse her. He had been about to scout around the area for danger, as well as for food and water for Rin. Yet with her shivering he hesitated.

If they made a fire the smoke could attract enemies. If he left her, Rin would be cold and uncomfortable, and Saya as well it was likely. There was a middle road, one that he had often used when she was a child…

Rin looked up sharply from where Saya was suckling when she heard Sesshomaru moving. She had expected him to vanish and leave her for a time, it was his usual routine while they were traveling, but now he surprised her and mimicked her earlier motion, pushing aside the fir branches and slipping into the shelter of the tree. "Sesshomaru-sama…?"

It was undignified to sit on the ground, and he had always preferred standing anyway, but Sesshomaru knelt at Rin's side. The maneuver was done carefully and thought out—he leaned the shoulder with the missing arm against the tree trunk and used his free arm to touch Rin's shoulder and side. Awkwardly, Rin accepted his touch and tucked herself into his lap. The warmth of his fluff on one side, and the cold of the armor on the other—she remembered the position from her childhood on the road. In the chilliest nights Sesshomaru adopted it to protect her from the cold, not speaking of it but unfailingly he cared for her, sharing his incredible heat with her.

The cold never appeared to bother him in the slightest, and when she was close to him in these times she could understand. Even through the fabric of his haori and hakama, Rin could feel his extraordinary warmth radiating out into her, almost as if it was projected. Fatigue descended on her at once and her head dipped as she started to nod off.

"Give Saya to me."

Sesshomaru's voice startled her awake abruptly. Rin blinked and asked, "What?"

"You must rest. Give Saya to me."

Rin hesitated for a moment and then lifted the bundle of blankets and robes that Saya was swaddled inside. She turned uncertainly and fumbled with Sesshomaru's haori, trying to loosen it. She had seen the way he preferred to carry their daughter and understood him better than to try asking how he wanted to hold Saya. Sesshomaru's robes were light, made of smooth, high-quality silk. Out of experience, Rin parted his haori relatively easily until she could see smooth, golden skin just beneath. Sesshomaru was unlike mortal men—he had no body hair at all. Except for the very adult musculature, he had the skin of a child.

Rin kept her eyes turned downward as she slipped Saya into his haori. She fought the heat that tried to rise in her cheeks when her fingers and hands grazed the smooth but firm skin of his chest. Saya blinked sleepily when she felt the motion as she was passed between her mother to her father, but quickly settled again, falling instantly asleep.

As she pulled away, Sesshomaru's clawed hand snatched one of Rin's wrists, holding it firmly still, keeping her from withdrawing. Now Rin was unable to control the heat that crept into her cheeks, over her forehead, and even her neck. She fought frantically with the desire to look at him.

"Rin." Sesshomaru murmured, his voice surprisingly hoarse, "Look at me."

She swallowed thickly and opened her mouth partway, but she made no sound through it, just breathed thickly, struggling with her own internal emotions. Finally she whispered, "Sesshomaru-sama…"

He released her wrist and instead moved his clawed hands to her face, slowly. His clawed fingers brushed her hair, then her cheek, touching her rounded, very human ears tenderly. A thumb touched her lips and then moved away again, as if shy.

The intimacy of the touch at last made Rin lift her eyes, meeting the inuyoukai's. The brightness of the golden irises alarmed her for a moment and she glanced away, fighting the instinctual rush of her heart as it took off. Her stomach twisted on itself, tightening with nervous excitement. It was a similar feeling to what she'd experienced as a teenager when she was first reunited with Sesshomaru, when the samurai suitors had lined up for her, ready to marry her. She hadn't known that he wanted her then, and barely dared to dream it.

Sesshomaru's hand moved to her chin. He gripped it, turning her face toward him. Her eyes followed the motion, coming to rest on his lips and then to gradually rise to his eyes once more. With the years of experience she'd gained from reading his miniscule emotional displays, Rin found warmth in his golden gaze and comfort in the slackness of his jaw.

She was still staring at him when he leaned forward and closed the gap between them, putting his cheek against her own. His skin was smooth as their child's, warm and dry. Rin felt herself shuddering and shivering, but not with cold. She closed her eyes, feeling tears burning close behind them. Her emotions were like snakes emerging from hibernation inside her, coiled and knotted together, immensely complex. She tried to push them down and settle them, the warmth and comfort of her mate overwhelmed everything else.

He would not speak, but there were times such as this, when they were very close physically, that she felt he could project more than heat to her—he could broadcast his very thoughts. Sesshomaru was not a creature of warmth and love; he was born and bred by violence. Inuyasha had humanity's characteristics as well as the inuyoukai traits, and as a result he was often a creature of blunt emotion and many blustered words. Sesshomaru's behavior was very much alien in that way. It was only the years of traveling and growing up beside him that had allowed Rin to come to understand him as she did.

In that moment she imagined his motion was a silent plea for her return to him emotionally. Though he would never say it, he needed her at his side, for himself and for their daughter.

She relaxed, breathing deeply, and her shuddering subsided as Sesshomaru's arm wrapped around her, keeping her tucked close to him as the sun dropped below the horizon. Darkness and the cold descended completely.

* * *

Deep inside the Nanka, Tsukiyume and Shippo at last heard word of where Shimofuri was. Sesshomaru's armies had advanced into the Middle Lands weeks ago, but after taking Sakaime the border town, they'd joined with Sasugainu in the north and then stopped, having no further orders. Messengers were sent but came back empty handed. Sesshomaru had disappeared, and without him the civil war came to a standstill.

In the intervening time Shimofuri and Sasugainu had split the Middle Lands, north against south. Shimofuri was tucked away inside the southern province. The eastern province, the Itou which was leaderless after Sesshomaru had killed Arasoizuki, was divided between them roughly in the center, north to south. Shimofuri was already at a disadvantage because to the north he faced his own uncle in league with Sesshomaru. To the south he faced the Western Lands themselves. He was sandwiched very effectively, trapped completely.

Tsukiyume had difficulty believing that her uncle had turned on her brother. She was troubled after they heard the rumors and kept to herself, brooding even as Shippo tried to cheer her up.

They reached Shimofuri's castle and were received swiftly, without even being dragged away to change their clothes. Shimofuri met them quickly, dressed almost casually in dark gray robes. His blue-black hair was tied back tightly, but his expression was relieved and filled with joy when he at last laid eyes on his sister.

"Sister." His expression was fatigued, but bright with happiness. He didn't sit at once, but instead the siblings embraced warmly, wrapping their arms around one another.

Tsukiyume began to sniffle, her shoulders shook. "Shishi-sama, I worried for you! I would've done anything to…"

Shimofuri made a shushing sound and withdrew from her, searching her face. His shoulders had fallen as the tension left his body. "You mustn't worry. Everything will be fine." He looked beyond her to where Shippo was seated, smiling timidly. His face rippled with confusion as he took in the kit. "Is this one of the Aojiroi clan messengers?"

"No, shishi-sama, this is Shippo, he lives with Inuyasha and Kagome." Tsukiyume tossed the kit a faint, nervous smile over her shoulder. Shippo returned her gaze uncertainly. He was aware of Shimofuri's reference to the messenger clan of kitsune that served the inuyoukai of the Middle Lands, and he knew that he actually _was_ related to them somehow, but said nothing. Shimofuri would of course scent the similarity, but Shippo wasn't going to try and explain things unless it was asked of him.

"I thank you." Shimofuri murmured, ducking his head slightly in genuine gratitude to the kit. "You have protected my sister on her journey back to me."

Shippo's cheeks turned red. "It was nothing, really…"

"Do you require escort for your return to your home on the coast?" Shimofuri asked, slipping into a colder, more formal tone.

Shippo fought a frown, beginning to realize where this was headed. Shimofuri was eager to push the outsiders away, to hide Tsukiyume back inside his castle, inside the Middle Lands, and to push Shippo firmly away. The audience room around him was beautiful, decorated in brighter colors than usual. It was the place where the highly unusual Taikokajin had ruled over the Middle Lands before her death and her heir, Shimofuri, had taken over. Shippo remembered Jinsoku Aojiroi, the kitsune messenger, and felt a growing desire to speak out, to insist that he actually _was_ one of the Aojiroi clan. If he was one of their messengers, Shippo would be allowed to stay in the castle, or at least in the town and countryside around it…

But the words refused to leave his mouth. Instead he bowed stiffly and answered, "No, I'm fine on my own."

"Brother—" Tsukiyume started to say something, but Shimofuri interrupted her.

"There are many things I must attend to—may I ask that you watch over Tsukiyume for a time? In a few hours I will be able to return to you both."

Shippo nodded eagerly and then bowed, trying to remember his manners. "Yes, Lord Shimofuri."

After embracing his sister one last time, Shimofuri excused himself, leaving the hanyou girl and the kitsune boy together again.

"He sure is busy!" Shippo remarked, sounding cheerful.

Tsukiyume nodded, her ears dropping ominously. "Shishi-sama is troubled. It must be my uncle." Her voice dropped at the end, becoming more of a growl. Her hands curled into fists at her side. "And Sesshomaru…"

Shippo shook his head sadly. "Tsuki, don't think about it right now. You're just hurting yourself. I'm sure he'll come to his senses."

She drew a deep breath and held it for a moment before nodding in agreement. "Yes, I hope you're right, Shippo."

* * *

Sesshomaru and Rin arrived at Jouka barely two days after they'd set out. By an order that was sent out ahead of them, Sesshomaru had already hired new servants and guards to staff the palace. A string of messengers were already waiting for Sesshomaru there, desperate for news and orders. He met with them stiffly, ordering the army that he had sent into the Hokubo to stay with Sasugainu to disperse and withdraw.

The messengers left, baffled by the latest twist their lord had taken, but obedient nonetheless. Meetings would likely be arranged, peace would be formalized there, treaties signed perhaps. Hostages might even be exchanged. Sasugainu had two daughters that could be traded, and now Sesshomaru had a mate, a wife, and a brand new daughter at stake.

Rin continued to grow stronger. The maids pampered her; fresh robes were brought in, perfumes, and fine foods. Nannies offered themselves up for service, as if to remove the extra burden of caring for her own baby, but Rin refused all of them. She nursed Saya and shared her bed with the baby just as any commoner would have.

She and Sesshomaru remained cautious around one another. They met often, sharing meals, and watching after Saya almost in turns, but true intimacy hadn't yet returned between them. It remained unknown whether the couple would ever regain it.

As the summer weather heated up again, Rin took a day where she indulged herself. She left Saya under the watch of the maids for a short time and, between breakfast and noon, dressed in men's clothes and headed for the stables. Pregnancy had thrown her balance off, and the miscarriages before that had often kept her from riding because she was always bedridden. Now, when she was trying to be healthy again, Rin took up the reins as a test of herself.

Only a few horses were kept at Jouka, and they'd been brought on mostly for Rin's education years ago. Roba had been one of those, but now Roba was of course absent, left behind with Miroku and Sango. There was one other mare left, a broodmare. The stallion was generally not ridden, but the gelding that Rin had learned to ride on originally was still there. He was a gray horse with a mottled coat, too ugly to be bred, which was why he was a gelding in the first place, more for riding or work than for anything else.

The stable boy that met with Rin was nervous and timid, but he worked with the animals well and saddled the gelding swiftly. Rin took the bridle from him and slipped it over the horse's head herself. His name was Nigori, for the odd coloration of his pelt. Rin patted his nose, rubbing the peach-fuzz hair that grew there.

For riding Rin had abandoned a proper kimono. Instead she'd raided some of the closets where the guards kept their uniforms. She dressed herself in gray-blue hakama with a bland cream-white hoari on top. The armor that Sesshomaru had had forged for her most recently was lost with Roba, left behind with Miroku and Sango as a sort of accidental gift. Sesshomaru didn't know this, and probably wouldn't care very much about it—he would simply have more armor forged for her. But Rin decided that dressing as a man wasn't enough.

Sesshomaru, the maids told her, was meeting with messengers or dignitaries, at least one person or youkai that was important. Rin took advantage of this knowledge and raided his closet, taking the first haori that roughly matched the hakama pants she'd stolen. It turned out to be a more casual choice, about the same color as the hakama she was wearing already. Partly Rin chose it because of the matching color, and partly because she remembered Sesshomaru wearing it when he came to her in the evenings, seeking her company physically, intimately…

She'd left her hair long and flowing freely, without any restraint. The stable boy could barely bring himself to look at her, let alone speak or interact with her. When Nigori was saddled the boy withdrew immediately and busied himself elsewhere.

Rin was fine with his cowardice—when she'd been younger and shorter, her sensei would've helped her get onto the horse, but now she could manage on her own easily enough. Nigori was steady as she hauled herself onto his back. Rin didn't ride like a lady, but gripped the horse's middle firmly between her thighs. She grasped the reins tightly in one hand and held her head high.

The gelding launched forward eagerly when she spurred him, straight out of the stables. His hooves beat over the ground powerfully; his gray-white mane flew as the air rushed past them. Rin felt dizziness for a moment, the rush of her own heart pounding inside her ears, then elation at the speed, the freedom…

She felt herself grinning, felt the wind in her face, flowing in her hair. "Nigori!" she shouted the gelding's name and pulled on the reins. The horse turned sharply as he was ordered, curving around the field. Rin spurred him at a fast run toward the river.

The field's smooth, green grass gave way to more dirt and rocks. The pitch of the horse's hooves changed as it clobbered over the stones and kicked up the sand behind them.

Jouka's land was set against a small mountain river. The water was always fresh and cold. Rin had often taken breaks from fighting or riding lessons as a young teenager to drink from it or splash the water on her face. It wasn't very deep, but the bottom was very rocky. As the water passed over the rocks it was often bright white, like snow in the middle of the summertime.

Nigori raced for the water, slowing as the ground became almost completely made of rocks. The horse hesitated at getting his feet wet. He tried to turn sideways, to trot parallel to the water. Rin clicked her tongue at him and pulled the reins toward the river, ordering Nigori to cross.

The gelding tossed his head once, disputing her decision silently, but he did as he was told and started into the water. Rin grinned, delighting in the feel of the water splashing at her feet and legs, as well as the simple splashing sound itself.

Nigori's ears flicked backward and forward then and he stopped, swaying back and forth uncertainly. Rin frowned and clicked at him, prodding him with her ankles to try and coax him into moving again. The water of the river continued to flow, just partway up the horse's legs, bubbling and hissing.

Rin noticed that Nigori's ears were swiveling, as if he was searching for something. She leaned forward, patting his neck and feeling the first beginnings of sweat there, gathering underneath his mane. The horse's nostrils were flaring. As she watched Nigori lifted his upper lip, tasting the wind. Again he shifted from foot to foot, apparently uneasy.

Rin frowned and looked ahead of them, across the river. The horse couldn't see as well as she could, but his sense of smell was like almost every other animal's in that it surpassed humanity's ability by leaps and bounds. Rin didn't try to catch the wind, she just used her eyes.

The source of Nigori's hesitation reached her at last—there was a figure standing in the distance, in the trees on the other side of the river. Though it was shadows and some feet away, Rin recognized it at once and released a long, slightly irritated breath.

"Sesshomaru." She muttered, defeated. Even from so far away she could see his bright hair, the amber in his narrowed eyes.

He stepped slowly out of the forest, into the sunlight. Nigori saw the source of his instinctive fear and nickered worriedly, stomping his feet as he might to try and intimidate a predator. Sesshomaru, of course, ignored the horse's warning and raised his voice to Rin, warningly.

"Rin. Go back to the palace."

Rin didn't answer him. Pulling on Nigori's reins, she directed the horse to turn away from Sesshomaru and cross back to the opposite back. Nigori whickered his fear and reluctantly turned his back on what he was certain was a predator—some kind of massive wild dog. Canine teeth weren't something he willingly chose to turn his backsides on.

They crossed out of the water, but instead of heading toward the stables and the palace, Rin spurred Nigori upstream along the riverbank. The horse's eyes rolled, the white showing as he tried to turn his head to look for the wild dog across the river—but Sesshomaru had vanished, though his scent had not.

"Hah!" Rin balanced her weight forward as Nigori picked up speed. The warm air began to rush by, rippling her long hair like a black curtain.

Suddenly Nigori slowed and tossed his head, grunting. He turned around, stamping his feet threateningly. Rin held on tightly with her hands as well as her thighs. She grit her teeth and looked around frantically for the source of the problem which could only be one thing.

The river passed over the rocks on one side, still hissing gently. The fields around Jouka lied in the opposite direction, wide and rolling and green with grass. The stables stood out closest. Rin thought she caught sight of the stable boy watching her. The forest was dark on the other riverbank, mysterious, shadowy. Nothing seemed that out of the ordinary…

Nigori whinnied and ducked his head, kicking out with his hind feet wildly. Rin cried out, falling forward with his movement and reaching frantically for the reins, for his mane…

The horse plowed forward wildly and the momentum knocked Rin into the air. She screamed as her fingers and feet found nothing but air. She had time to hear the sounds of wild fear she was making and to wonder at how young they sounded, and how strange—then her body slammed roughly into something warm and unyielding.

Her feet found the warm sand and the rocks, her toes dug in deeply. An arm was wrapped around her chest, pulling her back against another warm, powerful body. Not Nigori any longer, but something far stonier and nearly impossible to spook.

She lifted her eyes to see Nigori a hundred feet away, staring back at her with his wide horse-eyes. He had always been a good riding horse, but like any of the horses he was easily spooked by inuyoukai. Now he'd realized that he'd left his rider and was concerned about her as much as any animal could be, but nothing was going to make him rush back to defend her from the massive predator that was currently holding her tucked against him.

"Go back to the palace, Rin." Sesshomaru ordered her. There was a sharpness in her voice, irritation, impatience. Had he ended his important meeting on his own or had he cut it short because she'd left to ride a horse?

"Is Rin Lord Sesshomaru's prisoner now?" she asked, breathing roughly, catching her breath.

"I will not permit you to injure yourself." He hadn't released her, his arm was still wrapped around her tightly, pinning her to his chest. It was a wonder that he had caught her as he had.

"Rin is an excellent horsewoman, Lord Sesshomaru." She kept her voice quiet, hoping that she could convince him.

"I will not allow you to take that risk."

Rin sighed and lowered her chin onto his arm. Her black hair spilled over her shoulders, across his hand. "Please, Sesshomaru-sama…" she tried a different tone, small, almost whining. She was aiming for childish, hoping that would do the trick.

It didn't.

"Go back to the palace." He ordered her, coldly. His arm withdrew, slowly releasing her until she was free to turn around and see his face at last. Sesshomaru almost outright glared at her and then repeated his order. "Go back, Rin."

"What about Nigori?" she demanded, at last giving in to the irritation that was rising inside her.

"I will send a servant." He answered, blandly.

"Why don't you let me get him?"

He stared at her, clearly unimpressed with her suggestion, but he offered no verbal response except to repeat himself for the third time. "Go back to the palace."

Now Rin's temper ignited. Her hands curled into fists at her side and her mouth curled in a furious, mirthless smile. "Lord Sesshomaru does not trust Rin. He believes she will run away again or hurt herself in some way."

Sesshomaru's expression didn't change, but he must've grown tired of the exchange because he walked past her coldly, walking slowly but steadily toward the palace. "Follow me."

Rin obeyed him but she moved stiffly and walked with her eyes up and glaring at his backsides. As they passed the stables the boy was already rushing out, heading for Nigori. He snuck a quick glance at Rin and Sesshomaru as they passed, still gawking stupidly.

Sesshomaru forced Rin to enter the palace first and then shepherded her to the room that she used as sleeping chambers. There was a maid inside, sitting idly with a heap of folded clothes on one side and with Saya lying on the bed. She looked up with wide, startled eyes as an enraged Rin entered with a stiff, cold Sesshomaru behind her. The maid prostrated herself at once.

"Leave." Sesshomaru ordered her.

"Yes, my lord." The maid rose to her feet and, after throwing Rin one quick, worried glance, scurried out of the room. She left the door open behind her though and, irritably, Sesshomaru turned and slid it shut.

Rin knelt and scooped Saya up gently from the bed, examining the baby and then rocking her when she woke and made a small, preemptive crying sound. Sesshomaru watched them interact for a time, dispassionately. When Saya had quieted and closed her eyes again, drifting off into a deep slumber, Sesshomaru at last spoke. "Remove your clothing."

Startled, Rin looked up, taken aback. "What?" she almost squawked the word in her disbelief.

"You are wearing my haori." He observed aloud, "And those pants are made for men." He paused again, lifting his head a little higher and moving his eyes very briefly over her frame. "Remove them."

Rin frowned and shifted Saya, holding the baby closer to her as if defending her. "Get out." She growled.

"Do as I have instructed." He repeated, golden eyes narrowing dangerously.

She glanced back at him for a moment, wondering if he'd lost his mind. Sesshomaru's face was utterly serious, but Rin couldn't see any real anger as far as she could tell. At least, if he was angry with her, he was quashing it very well, or it was just so miniscule that he didn't show it. Taking this into consideration, Rin decided to try and bargain with him.

"Rin will do as Sesshomaru-sama asks if she may go riding when she has returned his haori." She lifted her eyebrows, challenging him.

Sesshomaru was unmoved by her suggestion. "No. You will remove the haori and hakama and dress as a woman. There will be no riding today."

Rin frowned and bit her lip with frustration. She wiggled one foot with irritation and stress but the motion jarred Saya enough that she opened her eyes and gazed around the room with annoyance. When she noticed that Saya was whimpering her protest, Rin stopped and gladly took the distraction that their daughter offered, rocking her until Saya closed her eyes contentedly again.

"Rin." Sesshomaru began, undoubtedly about to order her to take off her clothes again, but Rin sighed loudly, cutting him off.

Slowly, she rose from the bed and lowered Saya carefully onto it. The baby opened her eyes once and opened her mouth, yawning. Almost immediately afterward she began sleeping peacefully.

Turning her back on Sesshomaru, Rin stood in front of the mirrors on the opposite side of the room and began fumbling with the sash around her waist that kept the haori in place. She caught a brief sight of herself in the mirror and stopped for a moment to glare disgustedly at it. The ride and the fall had horribly ruined any semblance of order her hair had possessed beforehand. It stuck out wildly at odd angles messily. Rin spotted a few knots and caught herself groaning at the mess and the pain it would cause her later getting them out. Suddenly riding with her hair free seemed like a huge mistake. She glanced in the mirror and saw Sesshomaru watching her intently, reminding her eerily of a cat, and wondered just how it was that _he_ could keep his hair so smooth and knotless.

The sash came loose and Rin pulled the haori away, folding it in her lap and then turning back to Sesshomaru.

His golden eyes didn't leave her face as he took the haori from her. His face was expressionless but entirely alert, unreadable. He didn't thank her and didn't appear to have anything else to say anytime soon.

"The haori. You can leave now." Rin told him, trying not to frown bitterly. His behavior unnerved her, she longed for him to leave.

Surprisingly he wasn't finished with her yet. "This haori." He was speaking of the cream-white haori that she'd used as a sort of under robe. "It is not yours. Remove it."

Rin closed her mouth when it fell open, gaping like a fish. He meant to have her effectively strip before him and pass off every article of clothing that wasn't her own. There would be no sense in fighting him. Rin moved wordlessly back to the mirror and fumbled at her waist again, releasing the ties to the hakama and the cream-white haori as well.

The hakama dropped to the floor and she kicked them away with her feet. Her face burned, when she glanced at the mirror she saw that it was bright red, blushing up to her ears and down to her neck. Once she flicked her eyes to Sesshomaru's reflection and saw that he wasn't looking at her face, his eyes were turned more toward the floor, except that they were aimed a little too high. He was looking at her bare, exposed legs.

Beneath the hakama and the last haori she was wearing the barest of under robes, it was more of a slip really. It was cream-white, like the last haori. The under robe barely covered her hips or her backsides, hardly reaching her thighs.

Rin folded the haori and then knelt awkwardly to retrieve the hakama from the floor as well. She was aware of the mirror at her back, and certain that her movements would probably expose her most intimate parts for her mate's scrutiny if she wasn't careful. Since her pregnancy and Saya's birth, Rin had slimmed down, but she was still highly self-conscious of the plumpness that remained. Embarrassed, humiliated, she passed the haori and the hakama to Sesshomaru without meeting his gaze. Her lips were twisted in a silent, angry snarl.

At first it seemed that Sesshomaru would take the clothing uneventfully and leave her to the maids. But as Rin placed the haori and hakama on top of the other clothing she'd already shed, Sesshomaru dropped everything to one side, making Rin startle and gasp, taking a step backward. Before she could speak, indeed before she could make another move, he was directly in front of her, his only hand wrapped around her waist, keeping her close.

Rin gasped and her hands rose up to fight him off, but paused midway as she felt his mouth against her neck, his breath in her ear. Shivers ran up and down her spine, loosening up her muscles. The hands that had meant to push him away relaxed now and laid palms flat against his broad chest, feeling the musculature just beneath his robes.

He growled into her ear, a low, comforting sound, but spoke no words. His fingertips moved up down her back, feeling the curve of waist and hip and then migrating back toward her front. Cautiously, those same clawed fingertips touched on her breast through the thin fabric of her slip.

He had not touched her since she'd run away, not truly since she'd been pregnant. He'd treated her like glass. Now the changes in her body beckoned to him, especially her breasts, rich and swollen now with milk. He had witnessed Saya nursing many times, a scene he had never been privy to before, though the scents, with their inherent pheromones, had spoken to him many times on a deep, primeval level. Human milk was not like inuyoukai milk. It was sweet, like vanilla—the scent fit Rin very well, complimenting her to his sensitive nose.

She melted into his touch at last, pressing her body against his. Her legs began to give out as her body lost interest in the rest of the world and focused entirely on Sesshomaru.

He shifted his hand, instead using it to scoop her higher onto his body, to balance her. The slight change in position allowed her to feel his arousal. She responded most positively, breathing faster and making a small sound that he interpreted as want.

He growled again, low and deep in his chest, letting her feel the vibration, and bent one leg, propping her up higher still. She wrapped her arms around his neck and clung to him. Sesshomaru took the opportunity and brought his hand to her thigh, slipping his fingers boldly underneath the fabric of her slip and dragging them upward slowly. She shuddered as his touch advanced and moaned once.

His hands reached her breasts and he gripped one more firmly, with confidence…too much as it turned out.

Rin's body stiffened and she made a small noise, not of pleasure, but pain. Sesshomaru pulled back at once, releasing her and stepping away. As swiftly as it had begun, the encounter was over.

To Rin Sesshomaru appeared wild, his eyes were lit from within with a feral glow. His face was unusually soft, loosened by desire. His nostrils flared with each breath. She tried to find something to say but was oddly breathless. Her lack of clothing had ceased to matter, as had the mirror behind her and her embarrassment over a little extra baby-flab.

Sesshomaru knelt and scooped up the clothing Rin had shed at his command. Rin felt her heart drop as it appeared almost certain that he would leave her without another word, but again he surprised her. Instead of leaving, Sesshomaru placed the folded and stacked clothing on the futon beside their sleeping daughter and moved to a closet beside the mirrors. He slid it open and reached inside, pulling out a dove-gray kimono.

He strode forward with the kimono outstretched in his one hand. Rin felt her cheeks burning once more, but not with anger or humiliation this time. She stretched out one arm and slid her arm through the kimono. Sesshomaru dressed her other side, gently, almost tenderly. As a child he had occasionally helped to dress her, though more often he left it to Jaken, though the toad despised the job.

Together, moving slowly, with no hurry at all, Sesshomaru gathered the other elements of Rin's clothes, socks, an obi, an outer robe. The motions were done in silence, but the couple met one another eye to eye more often than they had in weeks, even months. It was a kind of courtly dance, almost as intimate as anything they might've done physically. Rin watched the inuyoukai's reflection as they worked whenever she could until at last the image was drowned out by sudden, unexpected tears.

Sesshomaru stopped, his hand stilled where it held the obi behind her, about to pass it back to her. "Rin?"

She sniffed her tears back fiercely. "Sesshomaru-sama?"

"Why are you crying?" his voice was calm and gentle.

She shook her head, rippling her messy, knotted black hair with the motion. "I don't know." Her voice trembled slightly. A few of the tears spilled out of her eyes and she wiped them away.

Sesshomaru's face rippled once with some unreadable emotion, then he shifted, pushing the long line of fabric in her obi forward again, as if they had never stopped. Rin took it firmly and finished securing it. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, with Sesshomaru knelt just behind her. Her chin wrinkled, quivering slightly. She opened her mouth for a moment, as if to speak, and then closed it and turned to face him directly.

He stared down at her, the corners of his eyes crinkled ever so slightly. The emotion might've been concern, but whatever it was he was firmly focused on her. Rin stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his without warning. She half-spoke while they were still in the position, murmuring, "I love you."

After a short moment Sesshomaru stepped away from her. A tentative, miniscule smile curved his lips. "Good day, Rin."

He turned his back on her and moved, almost wraith-like, from the room. Rin wiped her tears away and drew a long breath, releasing her tension. Her eyes flew to Saya though the baby had been silent the entire time. It was then that she noticed the clothing on the bed, still folded.

Sesshomaru had left them all behind, uncaringly. It seemed his true motives were obvious and had been all along.

* * *

A/N: wowie! Done! Here's a peek at _Innocence_ which I have already begun writing…

_Something latched onto Koinu's lower back and then actually fell to his butt, squeezing. _

_Yelping, he jumped away, whirling to face Kasai with wide, almost terrified eyes. His mouth fell open, opening and closing on the air like a fish. _

_Kasai raised her hands in a defensive motion, her cheeks were bright pink. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" she crossed her arms over her chest then and looked toward the sky. "There was a horsefly. They can bite through clothes you know." She was blushing down to her neck. _

Until next time…


	30. En

A/N: some dissention among the reviewers. Too soon? Is Sesshomaru really that cold? I think so. I'm always worried about his character being _right._ Let's face it, Sesshomaru is NOT human. This is a guy that, when his father is dying and they see each other for the very last time, he asks for his father's swords. When his father says, No, will you kill me for them? The hint is there rather firmly, the tension is sky high. Sesshomaru would kill his own father for power? Wow, what a jerk! Maybe I'm reading it wrong and Sesshomaru never would dare to do it, but in that moment, rather than lamenting his father's approaching death, Sesshomaru is concerned about power. So it's this Sesshomaru that I find myself returning to when I write this. He is NOT my boyfriend who tells me all the time that he loves me. He's _Sesshomaru._ His smile makes Jaken crap himself. Of course, so does almost everything else. Anyway, that's my small rant.

Rest assured though, it isn't perfect yet. There's still lots of crap waiting in the wings. Ginrei hasn't popped yet…

Disclaimer: Nope, no owning. I only claim Akisame, Koinu, Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, Masuyo, Shimofuri, Tsukiyume, Saya, Ginrei, and Hanone when she's born…

* * *

Last Chapter: Tsuki and Shippo reached the Middle Lands and met with Shimofuri. Sesshomaru's armies have stopped their advance and are camped out in the Hokubo with Sasugainu, waiting for orders that will never come, not for attack anyway. Rin and Sesshomaru switched locations, going to Jouka. At Jouka Rin tried to go horseback riding but Sesshomaru stopped her and then acted very strangely for him. Reminder: At the secret palace a healer has been hired, an old grizzled inuyoukai woman called En.

* * *

**En**

"My lady's scent is changing." En grunted at her one morning as she waited in the back of Ginrei's dressing room. The maids scurried around the young inuyoukai woman, adjusting her robes, tying sashes and obis.

Ginrei turned her head slightly, trying to see En out of the corner of her eye. "How?" she asked, her voice heavy with fatigue. The second half of her pregnancy had been draining as the child within her grew most rapidly, in more ways than physically. The white marks on her cheeks, thin and elegant, which marked her as high nobility, had faded recently, almost disappearing. Keeping her arms outstretched for the maids to dress her at times seemed more draining then any dance lesson or fighting exercise.

"My lady's heir is coming." En made a half-coughing, half-growling sound, hacking a little at the early morning phlegm in her throat. She was anciently old. Only her power, probably once very formidable, had kept her alive for so long. "You have lost your appetite?"

Ginrei glanced back at the mirror at her sallow face, her dull silvered eyes. "Yes."

"With my lady's permission I will summon her husband."

Ginrei bit her lips, her fangs nipping at the delicate flesh there. The maids finished securing her obi and clucked at her like hens, trying to get her to sit while they combed out her hair. Ginrei gladly followed their wishes, kneeling on the floor. She stared at her hands in her lap, sighing as she considered En's suggestion. Her belly had swollen so much, it was like a mountain encroaching on a river. Finally she lifted her eyes to En's grizzled form behind her in the mirror and nodded faintly. "You may."

"You believe he won't come?" En growled out with her raspy voice. Her face wrinkled up like an elephant's hide.

"It was his wish that he be here." Ginrei frowned as one of the maids pulled too hard on her long, flowing silver hair. "I do not care if he comes or not." Her shoulders sagged and she lowered her eyes. "I have done my part."

En bowed low. "My lady."

* * *

A day later, early in the morning, Sesshomaru found himself summoned unexpectedly to the small audience room in Jouka. He expected some messenger or other frail human to be inside bowing before him and begging his pardon. Then they would tell him something about the armies in the Middle Lands, still pleading for orders to advance or retreat.

As he approached the audience room, however, Sesshomaru felt something tingling at the back of his mind. The visitor inside the room wasn't human, it was youkai—inuyoukai. After he was announced by a servant, Sesshomaru stepped inside and stopped, not even bothering to sit down.

An ancient, grizzled old hag was sitting about ten feet from him. She hadn't bowed as was proper for her to do. Instead she sneered up at him through the thick wrinkles on her face. Her eyes were alive despite her gnarled appearance, a bright glowing green. She pinched her lips together as she examined Sesshomaru and then made a small grumbling noise in her throat.

"Inutaisho's son." She grunted and grinned, showing stained, chipped teeth.

Sesshomaru felt a crawling sensation in his spine, as if he'd suddenly been infested with worms and they were using his backbone as a highway. "Who are you?"

En made a smacking noise with her thinned lips, sucking on her teeth. "Currently I am employed as a healer, but I've been many things in my day, young one."

Now her disrespect was beginning to grate on him. Sesshomaru's lips moved slightly, trying to curl into a snarl or a sneer. He stifled it and settled for glaring at her, narrowing his amber eyes. "You would do well to learn manners, old one."

"So would you!" En croaked, laughing. Sesshomaru blinked as if she'd slapped him rather than laughing at him and his expression made her laugh all over again.

"What business brings you?" Sesshomaru demanded, at last giving in and snarling a little.

En sobered up and regarded him for a moment, almost pensively. Her expressions were made harder to read by the massive amount of wrinkles she had. At long last her green eyes narrowed and she said, "I have come to summon you to your wife. Her time has almost come."

Now Sesshomaru's demeanor changed, becoming bored and detached. "How long?"

"A day or so, I believe." En sniffed and sat back on her haunches, gazing around the room searchingly. "Of course you aren't very much interested in this news, are you? There is already an infant here." She turned back to him and her wrinkles face curled into a vicious, ugly snarl. "A disgusting half-breed. You are more like your father than I had imagined."

"Hag." Sesshomaru's voice dropped, warningly. "I could kill you for your insolence."

"And I should do the same to you, young one." En snarled, baring her ancient fangs at him. "You destroy our kind on two fronts! Nishiyori-sama's whole clan, and then like your father you sully your own bloodline." She hawked, as if about to spit. "Disgusting."

Normally Sesshomaru would've killed her on the spot, but there was something in the old inuyoukai woman's voice, in her eyes, in her scent that stopped him. Sesshomaru glared at her silently. The tension soared in the air as the two eyed one another, considering each other. Her words revealed a lot to him. She held respect for Nishiyori and his clan, now all deceased. She spoke of Sesshomaru's father in a familial way, as if she'd known him as well. And when Sesshomaru stared at her long enough, through the wrinkles and discolored skin, he thought he could see faded, almost vanished marks on her cheeks, the mark of nobility.

"Who are you?" he demanded, controlling his voice again deliberately.

"I've said what I've come to say." En muttered. She rose to her feet and turned away from him without bowing. Her robes were tattered, dragging behind her, dirtied.

Outraged, Sesshomaru strode after her but as she slipped out of the door and into the hall, very briefly out of his sight, Sesshomaru felt her aura vanish, like a puff of smoke or a scent fading away. Snarling silently he left the room and gazed down both left and right halls. There was no sign of her, though her scent continued to linger, stinking of age and dirt and herbs.

Defeated, but invigorated with frustration, Sesshomaru reentered the audience room and slid the door shut clatteringly. _Nishiyori-sama…you are more like your father than I had imagined…_

Sesshomaru lifted his head as he heard, distantly, elsewhere in the palace, Saya beginning to squall hungrily. He turned and headed in that direction, his face grim and cold.

* * *

Rin woke at once when Saya started to cry. Blearily she moved toward the source of the crying and reached over the side of her bed, touching the sleeping mats that had been set up for Saya. The infant was squalling, her cries growing steadily louder until Rin's fingers found the child's skin beneath her blankets. She quieted then, only whimpering as she registered her mother's presence.

Carefully, with her tired, thick fingers, Rin grabbed up her tiny daughter and hushed her, checking the linens that swaddled her, acting as a diaper. (A/N No Huggies in Feudal Japan!! AHHHH!) A maid slid open the door and bowed at the entrance. She was holding more of the scrap linens under one arm.

"My lady."

Rin sighed and began to unwrap Saya's blankets and the loose robes they'd dressed her in. "She's wet, Miki."

"Of course my lady." The maid moved beside Rin's bed and began to help her but Rin did most of the work herself, only accepting the linens from the maid and then passing the dirty swaddling to her as well.

"Hungry too?" the maid asked, smilingly as she gathered up the linens in her arms, clean in one, dirty in the other. Her sleeves were tied back to free her forearms for just this kind of dirty work.

"Of course." Rin returned the smile tiredly and cuddled Saya close, shifting her night robe a little to expose one breast for her daughter. The baby suckled quickly, pawing at her mother's chest hungrily. She was only a few weeks old, but already she had at least doubled her weight. Every scrap of nourishment that passed into her she kept, putting everything into growth and development.

There was a faint sound at the door, the floorboards shifted and creaked. The maid and Rin glanced up in the same instant and Miki fell into a bow, still holding the dirtied linens. Rin nodded her head respectfully but didn't move into a full, proper bow. Instead she observed her mate's face, not liking what she saw.

His face was stiff and cold. It reminded her, slightly, of the time before she had become pregnant with Saya, before he had brought her to Jouka from Nejiro. Now she realized that during that time Sesshomaru had been going to visit his _wife._ Instinct that she didn't know she had as a human whispered in her ear and a chill of foreboding swept through her.

"Lord Sesshomaru." The maid excused herself, leaving the room. She knelt to slide the door shut, but Sesshomaru glanced at her over one shoulder and she stopped, seeing some silent meaning in it. Mumbling something that was probably an apology, the maid walked away, her footsteps receding down the hall, leaving the couple alone.

"Rin." He started, his voice deep and cold.

She interrupted him, meeting his gaze with her brown eyes narrowed suspiciously. "You're going to tell me you're leaving, aren't you?"

He stiffened, his lips thinned and his jaw tightened. "I have been summoned elsewhere."

"Where?" Rin demanded. She sat up, moving as if to get to her feet and approach him challengingly, but she stopped when she heard Saya whimper and hiccup, trying to burp. Rin paused and adjusted her robe, covering herself. Her breasts had been bared for nursing. Saya squirmed in her arms.

"It is not important." Sesshomaru answered blandly, as she had anticipated. It confirmed her suspicions at once.

"Your wife has called you, hasn't she?" Rin bit out. Emotion that she'd thought she'd buried started to well up in her. She snuck glances at Sesshomaru and knew he would perceive those glances as glares, silent snarls of protest. His wife was inuyoukai, Rin couldn't compete with her as a human. She would age long before Sesshomaru did, his wife would stay young at his side. And she could bear him a hundred heirs in those years…

Her shoulders shook and her stomach seemed to swell, crawling into her throat as if it had something to shout at Sesshomaru too. But no words came, no sound, nothing.

"She has summoned me, yes." He answered truthfully, his spine stiff, his eyes cold and distant.

There was a pause. Rin's eyes drifted about the room unfocusedly. She saw the small table near the door where she'd studied and written poems before Shimofuri had come and told her the truth about her mate, about his campaign in the Isei, about this inuyoukai wife. Did Sesshomaru care for this other woman? He claimed over and over that he didn't, and Rin understood supposedly how he'd come to possess this wife, essentially stealing her from the clan. But she had never seen the inuyoukai woman—and Sesshomaru had wasted no time in producing a child with her.

She stared at Sesshomaru's feet as a cold feeling entered her bones. What if the other woman was a prisoner? What if she was _forced_ to join with Sesshomaru to create a child? Could her mate, the creature she so loved, that she had followed unquestionably as a child, thinking of him as her entire world—was he that much of a monster? Was he a rapist?

"I must leave." Sesshomaru started to say and his feet shifted on the floor, turning to go…

Rin lifted her eyes and her face. "Wait!"

The inuyoukai lord paused, though his back was already facing her. "What is it, Rin?"

Frantically, Rin pulled her robes tightly around her and clutched Saya close to her chest. She slid from her bed and fell to her knees behind Sesshomaru. The change in position startled Saya and she began making tiny, low-pitched sounds. She was growling.

Over the sound of their daughter, Rin said, "Sesshomaru-sama—take me with you."

There was silence from Sesshomaru at first. Rin stared at his feet, remaining in her bowing position. Sesshomaru's feet shifted and moved, turning partly back toward her. Rin felt her mate's eyes on her back, on the top of her head as he looked down at her. "I cannot."

"Rin wishes to know why not? Is it not fair that she meets Sesshomaru-sama's wife?"

His answer was swift this time. "Another time perhaps."

"Rin wishes to meet her now." She broke with the formal language and made the words, the request, more personal. "I want to meet her now because now is when she is birthing our daughter's sister. I would very much like to meet the mother of my daughter's sibling. I would like to know every member of my family."

She swallowed, aware of the tightness in her chest, the flutter of her heart inside her, and Saya's little sounds of frustration against her. Even the puff of the baby's breath on her neck. One fist was on the ground, supporting her in her bow. She was certain Sesshomaru could see that it was a fist and not her flat hand, palm pressed to the floor. It was a fist, a motion of anger, of upset.

"It is a long journey." Sesshomaru told her, making excuses. His voice was hesitant, stiff.

"I'm strong." Rin replied. Saya squirmed in her arms, making baby noises, fussing slightly.

"There is Saya. You must stay with Saya."

"She is strong, Sesshomaru-sama. She is your daughter. She has already survived one journey." Two actually, if the journey that Rin had undertaken while Saya was still in the womb counted. This argument would be difficult for Sesshomaru to dismiss. If he did it was as if he was refuting his own strength.

Sesshomaru drew in one breath and when he spoke there was a fresh sharpness, irritation. He was running short on excuses. "I will not permit you to risk illness, you or the child."

"Please, Sesshomaru-sama." Rin frowned at the way her voice had grown higher and more plaintive, outright begging. She refused to be left behind, her will set and hardened against the thought, her composure was rigid and heavy, but like glass it could be easily shattered around her.

Perhaps Sesshomaru sensed that he could not win, perhaps he noticed her fist on the mats, perhaps there was a quiver in his lips, a crinkling at the edges of his golden eyes. The mighty inuyoukai lord took in his mate, clasping their child to her neck and chest, bowed before him, and considered his wife in one of the first times he'd ever seen her. Prostrate before him, cowed, shivering and quaking. Rin was not Ginrei, and if she shook it was from physical weakness or, more likely, rage and determination.

Lifting his chin into the air, Sesshomaru resumed his usual stoic, almost arrogant coldness. "You may accompany me. Ready yourself, we must leave swiftly."

Rin's shoulders moved as if she was laughing or sobbing, jittering. She lowered further into her bow, completely obscuring her face from him. "Rin thanks Sesshomaru-sama for his kindness in granting her this request."

But Sesshomaru had already left her room, leaving the door standing open. Maids rushed in after his departure, hurrying to wait before Rin even before she'd recovered from her bow. They would dress her and Saya for the approaching journey; they would give her warm tea and any meal she wished. But inside as Rin faced this mess of servants; she was cold and as distant as the moon.

(A/N: If you take that last sentence, it's currently how I feel about my writing. No idea why, only that I've been emotionally troubled lately…for various reasons.)

* * *

The weather turned warm and humid. Dampness clung to the leaves and grasses. The air was alive with wind, but it offered little relief from the hazy sunlight overhead. Insects swarmed over the paths that Rin and Sesshomaru travelled. The road wasn't well-traveled any longer. In some day centuries ago perhaps it had been a road for human or youkai, marching between one city and another. Yet whatever reason had originally created the path had long since expired and the path was now fading into the forest.

It seemed to Rin that this path might've been made by her mate and its upkeep was also solely his responsibility. Her suspicions were brought on by the way Sesshomaru slashed at the small trees that encroached on the pathway. Without pausing he would send out his whip and slash at the bases of the saplings, cutting them down and flinging them violently out of the way. Tiny stumps were all that was left, poking out of the weeds and grasses.

It was only when Rin spotted the distant, ruined huts in the overgrown forest that she realized this path was actually ancient. Centuries before warfare or disease, any number of tragedies, had cut down the villages that bordered this pathway. Perhaps destruction had even marched right over the path itself, and destroyed all life along the way.

The trees had grown overhead, closing in the canopy. Only occasionally did Rin spot the open, hazy sky. In the afternoon when Saya began to shriek with hunger, Rin was forced to stop along the side of the path, pushing her way through weeds and flowers and grass. She sat awkwardly at the side of the road and fumbled with her robes trying to nurse her baby.

Ahead some distance Sesshomaru stopped. He didn't turn to look back at her directly, but his head was cocked at an angle, indicating that he was listening attentively to what was going on. At his side his ghostly glowing whip was waiting. The grass it dangled and curled on was withering pathetically, sensing the poison in his terrible power. After a moment he took another step and let the whip fly. The gleam of the green tendril wrapped around a small, bushy pine at the base. The little tree shuddered once and, as Sesshomaru gave a sharp jerk with his one arm, it was torn free and tossed carelessly across the path, into the dense foliage on the other side.

Saya's cries stopped as she got what she'd wanted and started to nurse eagerly. Rin avoided looking at Sesshomaru, of what she could see of his rich, white haori and hakama through the forest ahead, and instead glanced at the darkness underneath the trees on the opposite side of the road. Something was there, a stone structure, no doubt carved by intelligent, nimble human fingers. It might've been an ancient alter to some forgotten spirit or god. Now it was overrun by proud trees and vines shooting up from the ground. It was another part of the forest now, its human history forgotten and lost to time.

Rin turned her gaze to her daughter, shuddering. The baby was innocent and happy, nursing with her eyes shut. The warmth of the day was making her sleepy and content. She stopped suckling a few times in a row, falling momentarily asleep and forgetting exactly what she was doing. Then her little body would snap taut and her golden eyes snapped back open. Her claws flexed and pawed at Rin then as she resumed her vigorous suckling.

Something caught Rin's eye, on the ground beside her feet. Curiously, Rin reached for it, poking at it with her fingertips. It was an oddly shaped stone, colored a light gray. As Rin pushed it, maneuvering it, she saw what it was clearly and pulled her fingers away as if it had bitten her.

The little stone was carved into a face, rounded. There were grooves in the back, hinting at a rich, flowing head of hair. Yet it was the front that captured her attention. The gray stone was painted, or had been once. Time had worn and chipped it, but Rin could still see it was there, pink-red marks like ocher over the cheeks of this face…

It was a carving of a demon, perhaps even an inuyoukai, one that had the same markings as Sesshomaru. It was female, Rin could see from the shape of the face, the pout of the lips. A characterization of feminine beauty.

"Rin."

She gasped, startled, and looked up at her mate with her wide, earthy brown eyes.

"We must keep moving."

As if she feared what Sesshomaru would do to their child, Rin clutched Saya closer out of instinct for a moment and then, with effort, hauled herself to her feet. The movement made her sandaled toes brush against the carved stone, moving it. Sesshomaru's golden eyes flew to the motion and narrowed briefly, then, inexplicably, his face softened.

Rin gazed at his face covertly when she saw the change, following his line of sight to the carved stone. She cleared her throat and hazarded a question. "Sesshomaru-sama? What is this place? The ruins along the path…?"

He didn't remove his attention from the carved stone when he answered her. "This is the Kosetsu province." Without further word he turned his back on her and began walking again, the fascination with the carved stone forgotten at once.

Rin followed him, frowning with confusion. Saya had fallen into a restless sleep and Rin tucked her child protectively into her robes, grimacing at the heat. It was too warm to carry her daughter, like a little space heater, close to her skin, but the forest was a dangerous place. Rin could almost feel the ancient eyes watching her, the ghosts of the dead pondering her passage on their road. The sight was an unusual one, the shimmering, immortal inuyoukai Sesshomaru leading the way, clearing the path, stoic and exuding power with every step and breath. Behind him was the ravenous, slightly cranky Saya, carried by Rin, the fragile mortal woman. Unarmed, dressed richly, and covered in sweat. She was dressed for chilly fall weather but it seemed summer was not yet truly gone. Weakness still made her joints shake and tremble, and if she moved quickly, sitting up or kneeling, stars swarmed across her vision. Yet, unerringly, she followed behind Sesshomaru, as she always had.

The eyes of the dead watched silently, their judgment unknown and meaningless.

* * *

The Western Lands had not always been united under one leader. The change had come, as had a lot of other renovations, with the powerful Inutaisho. Long ago small, feuding provinces had made up the Western Lands. Like the provinces in the Middle Lands, they were ruled by youkai that warred amongst themselves. War and destruction were the only constant for the creatures that lived there, human, animal, and youkai alike. The threat of invasion had changed that at last. As Inutaisho rose to power and almost single-handedly pushed back the invaders, he united the Western Lands under his power. Other leaders submitted to him, died in the war to fend off the invaders, or as in one case, married him.

The Kosetsu was remote and small, hardly habited even in its own time, yet it had been successful. Its people were not warlike, and their destruction had come when invaders swept through, burning and killing. Their protectors, for uncountable generations back into the depths of time, were female. Once mankind had worshipped femininity for its fertility, holding them as holy. One line of female inuyoukai had stepped in and become a figurehead of such beliefs, nurturing them into the future long after those around the Kosetsu accepted patriarchy. This line had eventually sired Sesshomaru's mother. She ended the Kosetsu's separation from the other provinces and, when she bore a son, she buried the faith that her ancestors had long protected, in order to give her son and her husband reign over a wide, unbroken expanse of land: the entire Western Lands.

But that decision had sealed the doom of the humans living under her power. Superstitious, angry youkai and humans had passed through the unprotected Kosetsu, punishing them for their long-held and cherished beliefs, scattering them to the wind.

Somewhere, in the ruined forests and mountains of the small Kosetsu, was the palace where Sesshomaru himself had been born to a mother longing for the next _female_ heir. Though her hopes had been dashed as she found herself holding a son, she saw his likeness to herself and her long line of female ancestors, and her heart was stolen and transformed. The future lied with the sons of her line and Inutaisho's, or so she had believed.

Now she would laugh when she heard the news on the wind. She was a grandmother, though she didn't look it, and Sesshomaru had extended her line with _daughters,_ not sons.

And the ruins that Sesshomaru passed, burned and charred and overgrown even as he had barely tasted meat for the first time, stood as a mockery to him. They had only been humans—his mother never cared anything for them really—but although Sesshomaru would profess to the same lack of feeling, it was impossible to deny that the woman with his firstborn child in her arms was only _human,_ Like his father Sesshomaru carried the same, odd weakness for them.

The path would have long since filled in. The ruins would've been shrouded permanently in forest darkness. Yet Sesshomaru had walked this pathway for years, always clearing it of saplings with each pass. If he had been female, the Kosetsu would've been his territory first, and the Western Lands as a whole would come second. He hadn't forgotten this responsibility, though no one, not even his own mother, expected him to hold true to it.

He loosed his whip and sent the whispering, green glow into the saplings again, and pulled them free, cutting them down, expanding the path.

* * *

Ginrei sat on the lush grass beside a shallow, blue-green pond. The sun was bright overhead, the haze clearing away as the afternoon matured. There were koi fish in the pond, lazily swimming about, their mouths opening and closing as they swam, like friends in continuous, casual conversation. The koi were brightly colored, white, orange, gold, and black. The light of the sun dazzled the water, throwing sparkles off it and onto Ginrei's face.

Compared with the bright, cheerful fish, Ginrei was like a stone. Her face and hair were pale, lacking any luster. Her robes were dark today, a purple-red. This only worsened the washed-out appearance that Ginrei had. Her body was round and her face plump. If her color had been better one might've called her prosperous and healthy. Yet this wasn't the appearance she had at all.

"Lady Ginrei!" a high, panicked voice shot out over the garden and she looked up, slowly, without energy or enthusiasm.

Jaken was rushing toward her, scurrying over the curving bridge that crossed the little flowing stream, trickling from the little lake to where the koi were housed in their little pond. He panted and flung himself before Ginrei in a bow but didn't wait for her to acknowledge him before he announced what had brought him in such a panic. "Lord Sesshomaru has come!"

The toad was grinning, merrily. Of course he had missed Sesshomaru. He was antsy, eager to rush away from her and greet Sesshomaru himself. It was startling, in fact, that Jaken had taken himself away from that to tell her of his arrival. A thought came to Ginrei: _where is En?_

"My lady! You must come!" Jaken shouted when she didn't at once answer him or hop up to meet Sesshomaru herself. Of course the toad couldn't understand that moving anywhere was a struggle for Ginrei. Her balance had disappeared, her girth unsteadied her. The child inside her had drained her of all energy and had been doing so for quite some time.

As a youth, when she'd lived with her many female relatives, Ginrei could remember a woman joining them that was not a sister, a cousin, an aunt, or a grandmother. She was someone's wife, recently brought into the clan, and pregnant. The pregnant female had seemed horribly dull to Ginrei, barely moving, sickly, and always tired. She'd thought that the other woman was weak, a poor choice to carry offspring for the Nishiyori clan. Yet now she understood this weakness personally and found a new empathy for the woman in her memories.

"I am very tired, Jaken." Ginrei murmured, sighing slightly. "Would you be so kind as to bring Lord Sesshomaru to me? I will meet him here."

The toad nodded happily. "Certainly, my lady!" he scampered away, breathing roughly, though whether it was with excitement or exertion was anyone's guess.

Ginrei gazed around the garden, searching for En. The old inuyoukai woman had returned late the previous night, but Ginrei only knew of this because the maids had told her. En hadn't appeared, hadn't come in and woken her, hadn't examined her. Worry nagged on Ginrei, but she pushed it away as movement caught her eye.

Passing through the gardens in the distance, Ginrei could see the shimmering white of her husband's head. The bushes and trees he moved past also offered glimpses of his white hakama and haori. Once she even caught the glint of his gray, metallic armor. She changed her position with an effort and lowered herself with a grunt into a deep, formal bow as her husband approached.

Jaken was jabbering and she could hear footsteps on the bridge. The confident thump of Sesshomaru's boots, the scraping, clapping sound of Jaken's bare toady feet, and a third set. Small, light, like that of a female or a child. Ginrei strained her nose, wishng she hadn't dropped into the bow so quickly. Now she would be unable to see the third creature—was it En?—that had come to her with Jaken and Sesshomaru.

"We're so pleased to see you, my lord! Lady Ginrei has been very tired lately!" he huffed and Ginrei smiled faintly to herself. "That old witch we hired as a healer says it's completely normal though!" he chuckled nervously, "Certainly we've done everything we could…"

"Silence Jaken." Sesshomaru's voice came at last, smooth and deep, full of calm seemingly.

"Yes my lord! Of course!" Jaken's words were smashed and smothered as he fell into a submissive bow.

"Ginrei." Sesshomaru called her name gently and Ginrei sat up slowly, letting her eyes travel over her husband's fine, exquisite features. The smooth jaw, the high brows and refined cheekbones. The crescent moon in the center of his forehead, the elegant markings over his cheeks. Their child would have to be beautiful, but would she carry her beauty with the same coldness as her proud, distinguished father? Ginrei let her gaze fall away from him, troubled.

And right onto the mortal woman standing a few feet behind him. Ginrei wasn't certain how she could've missed the mortal for as long as she had. Sesshomaru, for all of his stoic perfection and beauty, was not the centerpiece in that moment.

The woman was young, perhaps not beyond two decades of life, though Ginrei wasn't well-versed in the life-spans of mortals. Her robes were bright and rich; autumn colors worn just a bit too early. They marked her as royalty, a rich woman, a favored wife…_mate._ Ginrei realized with a small jolt that this was Sesshomaru's mate, brought now at this most awkward of moments, when Ginrei was at her weakest.

The mortal woman was beautiful. Her face was oval, her lips full and heart-shaped. Her eyes were deep brown, like fertile earth. Apparently for their journey she had left her hair down, flowingly long. It was a coarse hair, unlike Ginrei and Sesshomaru's. The woman, Sesshomaru's _mate,_ was staring at Ginrei fixedly, her gaze riveted on her. As Ginrei lifted her own eyes and met this gaze, the mortal woman's expression twisted into a small but fierce frown. Her eyes revealed consternation, as if she didn't know what to feel or how to react, but her lips were downturned and her eyebrows were furrowed, like hairy caterpillars kissing over her neat nose.

Ginrei might've felt something akin to insult, or perhaps embarrassment, but then her nose and her eyes at once fed her a new suspicion. The mortal woman was holding something. Ginrei had been so engrossed by the woman's face and clothes that she hadn't noticed the awkward position of her arms, or the lump that was now moving, _squirming._ In the same moment she inhaled sharply and picked out the scent of lactation, milk—not an inuyoukai's, but the human woman's.

Her thoughts skittered wildly, flicking to Tsukiyume. _Hanyou._ The cross between youkai and mortal human beings. Ginrei's hands in her lap twisted and twined on one another and she felt the desire to drop into a bow again to hide her reaction, to hide her face.

"Ginrei." Sesshomaru called her name again, more sharply this time. "Walk beside me."

She ducked into a small bow, hiding her face and consenting to his order in one motion.

"Jaken." Sesshomaru summoned the toad, "Take Rin inside. See that she is made comfortable."

"Yes Lord Sesshomaru! It will be done immediately!" the toad hopped to his feet and energetically moved toward the mortal woman with a stiff gait, as if she could do nothing to dissuade or slow him down.

The mortal woman held her ground. "Sesshomaru-sama…" her voice was tight.

Sesshomaru ignored her and moved to stand at Ginrei's side as she pulled herself upright, grimacing unsteadily. The grass was soft, it sighed beneath her feet in their simple white socks. Ginrei glanced to the mortal woman, taking her in again, seeing the frown that had deepened, the displeasure at her mate's orders. She tried to smooth her own face into a sympathetic expression, tried to show the other female empathy, but when the woman spotted her looking at her she blinked and her face seemed to flush red. Not with embarrassment, but rage.

"Rin!" Jaken called hoarsely, half-pleading. His terminology with her was unthinkably familiar. Ginrei couldn't have known that Jaken and Rin were actually very well acquainted after all. "Please! You must do as Lord Sesshomaru commands!"

The toad pressed against Rin's legs and she took a step back, almost stumbling. Rin stumbled slightly and the infant in her arms squirmed, crying out its—_her_—protest.

_Another daughter._ Ginrei thought, staring openly at the mortal woman. In spite of the frowning, the jealousy she could feel flowing from the other woman, Ginrei felt her own heart hammer, picking up speed and strength for the first time in months. Her blood ran warm and energetic. The mortal woman was kin now, and she had a daughter—_Sesshomaru's_ daughter. As uncertain as her feelings were to her husband, the draw of blood was powerful. Her unborn daughter was linked unquestionably with the child squalling inside Rin's arms. They would be sisters, and because of that, Ginrei felt a connection, no matter how much of it was imagined, to the other woman.

"Come." Sesshomaru ordered her, stiffly. His arm closed over her shoulder, but it was cold, it brought her no joy. Ginrei obeyed, turning away from Rin and Jaken and the screaming infant.

They began walking. They left the grass and the koi pond behind, ascending a small hill to reach a stone path. It was narrow and winding through gardens that had not yet recovered from the war that had passed through them some time ago. Ginrei could feel the texture of the stones through her socks. She considered asking Sesshomaru to take a detour and return indoors, but her own enthusiasm at the sunshine, the sweetness of the late summer air, and the beauty of the grass, the stone path, and the trickling water, kept her silent.

They walked without touching, but closely nonetheless, more as cousins or siblings might walk beside one another. With their shared features, the fair hair—Sesshomaru's white, Ginrei's slightly darker true silver—they looked more like family than husband and wife.

"You are well?" Sesshomaru at last asked her, his pace slowing slightly.

She wasn't certain how much he wanted to know. Did he want to hear about how their daughter kicked her insides at night, keeping her awake? Did he want to hear about how her breasts hurt as they grew pendulous and swollen with milk? Did he want to hear about how, as her stomach was squished by the child's growth, Ginrei's appetite was monstrous and then just as quickly food would repulse her, making her vomit if she as much as smelled food.

"I have suffered fatigue." She told him, sighing slightly. "But I am well."

"The child will come soon?" he asked, staring straight ahead. His face was unaffected and unlined, absolutely unmoved by her news.

"En told me that she would come soon, yes." The previous energy that had infused her leached out of her a little then, as if speaking were too strenuous for her.

Sesshomaru paused then, making Ginrei stop as well and stare at him, confused. "Who is she? Who is En?"

"The healer." Ginrei answered blandly. She looked at the ground, as if distracted by a fluttering leaf or a bird hopping over the grass. Ginrei didn't know where En came from or who the old inuyoukai woman was loyal to. She seemed so old that her allegiances had vanished into time, buried as bones deep in the earth.

"You know nothing else about her?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Nothing." Ginrei didn't look at him when she responded; she focused on the blades of grass that shifted in the wind. She had her suspicions about En, but she wasn't going to reveal them.

Sesshomaru, if he deduced this, seemed fit to leave it be. He began walking once more, his steps slow and small. Ginrei moved after him, keeping pace. There was more to be said, but innately Ginrei knew that Sesshomaru wouldn't say it, wouldn't even start or hint at it. She would say it or it would remain unsaid, forgotten and buried.

"You brought your mate?" she asked, prompting him at last.

"She is called Rin." He replied, stiffly.

"I would enjoy talking to her. She has a daughter as well."

"You must not strain yourself." Sesshomaru told her, dismissively. His golden eyes were set forward, scanning the gardens like a hawk, as if anticipating danger or his next meal.

"It wouldn't strain me." Ginrei insisted, firmly. Before her family had been slaughtered, partly at Sesshomaru's bidding, Ginrei had enjoyed a massive, extended family of women. Rin was her first chance to get a tiny slice of that security again and she was eager to do it. And aside from that, Rin was a mortal woman that had captured the affections of the most powerful inuyoukai around currently. How could speaking to her _not_ be interesting?

"Do not pursue her." Sesshomaru was glaring, but the look wasn't directed at Ginrei, as if he'd forgotten to turn his face toward her.

Ginrei pursed her lips into a tight, narrow line, but she said nothing. The silence dragged onward, relentlessly. Their path circled onward, eventually reaching back to the palace, reaching the wooden bridge that crossed the lake to where the palace was perched atop the waters. At the edge of it, Sesshomaru halted and faced her.

"For as long as you are able, you will join me for meals?" he asked, stiffly.

Ginrei guessed, staring at him, that this was Sesshomaru's idea of obligation to her. He would eat with her in this time before their daughter was born. He would stay while she labored and perhaps after she recovered, long enough to see their child, to see her still alive, and to go through the ceremony of naming. Perhaps they would discuss when they would try again to conclude their "business transaction," when they would try to conceive a second child, hopefully a son. After that he would disappear again, leaving with Rin and the hanyou daughter, and she would be alone again.

She nodded slowly, trying to conceal the strange emotion trying to bloom inside her. Was it exhaustion or…regret? Loneliness? She thought of the redness on Rin's face, the anger and resentment. Perhaps Ginrei inhabited the better position as the cold wife bound by a bribe for power, rather than the mate, bound helplessly and hopelessly by love. How hard it must be, she thought, to love the cold being before her. She could not name her own feelings toward him, but knew that it wasn't love. Not by far.

"It will be my pleasure, Husband."

Sesshomaru turned away from her and crossed the bridge swiftly, leaving Ginrei standing outside in the late summer sunshine, the lake water glistening brightly, cheerily back at her. Again she felt the strength leaching out of her bones. Her shoulders fell, sagging, before she too at last crossed the bridge back into the palace.

* * *

As Sesshomaru walked around the palace gardens with Ginrei, Rin found herself being served tea inside the little, foreign palace. The maids were interested in her, full of compliments. They had heard her name here before, but never laid eyes on her of course. Really it wasn't Rin that drew their attention—it was Saya. Even Jaken stayed with her probably not because he was interested in her, but because she had a baby—_Sesshomaru's baby._

The toad wasn't as gifted as far as sense of smell went when compared to an inuyoukai, but he had, at many instances, been able to recognize that Rin had been pregnant. Of course he knew the babies growing inside her were Sesshomaru's. Her miscarriages had ended his excitement about them, but now those times were over. A real, living, squirming, screaming bundle of baby lied in Rin's arms now.

Saya fussed, she was hungry yet again, but the tea, the maids, and Jaken seemed unwilling and perhaps unable to see that. Rin was torn between their attention and compliments and pulling away into privacy to feed her baby.

"She looks just like Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken kept repeating over and over again, squawking with shock. "I was terrified it would look like that fool Inuyasha!"

"Lord Sesshomaru is a father twice over." One of the maids murmured, quietly. The humans, although polite, were understandably wary of Rin and her baby. They were accustomed to Ginrei's pregnancy, an inuyoukai carrying another inuyoukai's child. But Rin was human, her baby, no matter how adorable, was still something of a taboo.

Abruptly the door slid open and a very old, very wrinkled woman stepped into the room. Her face was twisted and snarling; her green eyes were set firmly on Rin and the baby in her arms. At first Rin thought the woman was human. The youkai that she'd seen were always beautiful and fair, young and stoically beautiful. This one was ancient, gnarled. She parted her lips in a sneer that might've been a smile, and revealed sharp, yellow teeth, chipped and uneven.

The maids shifted uneasily at her appearance and Jaken moved suddenly away from Rin's side. "En! Where have you been? Lady Ginrei was alone in the gardens! Have you even bothered to check on her today?" he demanded, indignantly.

The old inuyoukai sucked wetly on her teeth and released a breath with the sound that had become her namesake. _"Ehn,"_ her gaze skidded from Jaken and toward Rin where it narrowed. "I thought I smelled the stink of half breed scum."

The maids made a few noises of shock and alarm. When En looked at them, hearing their dismay, she snarled and gestured violently. The maids scattered, hurrying out of the room meekly. Jaken was huffing, trying to recapture En's attention.

"How dare you speak…!"

"I'm sick of you little toad." En growled out, her words barely recognizable. She lifted one of her clawed hands. The talons were discolored, not bright and clean any longer like Sesshomaru's, but they had yellowed and grayed. Even so they remained strong and sharp and En had experience with using them.

Her hand descended, slashing at Jaken. He screeched, shrilly. His body flew against the wall. A bone snapped audibly.

"Jaken!" Rin called, shocked. Her mouth fell open, she moved, trying instinctually to go to the toad's side, but En was there, moving faster than her ancient body should've been able.

Rin stumbled backward, her eyes wide and terrified. Before the wrinkled face with its feral green eyes, she had become a child again, mute, defenseless. The wolves were descending on her, baring their white, glistening fangs, sinking them into her flesh…

Saya gave a shrill howl. Rin had left her on the table for the others to view her more easily. Now the baby kicked with her tiny legs and clawed at the air with her clawed hands. That sound snapped Rin out of her shock.

En raised her hand again, sneering, but Rin moved quickly with desperation, moving back to Saya and scooping the baby into her arms. As En moved away from Jaken more in pursuit of Rin and Saya, the toad whimpered and called Rin's name faintly. He was alive and trying to get to his feet already.

Rin tried to rush for the door—the maids had shut it!—but En was fast, changing direction and blocking her.

"You human waste!" En snarled thickly between her chipped teeth. "Little bitch!"

"Who are you?" Rin demanded, clutching Saya to her and frantically searching for some sort of escape. _Where is Sesshomaru?_ As En advanced Rin backed away, trying to keep the flimsy tea table and the cushions between herself and the ancient inuyoukai woman. It was not truly a barrier; it wouldn't keep the woman away for long.

En ignored her question and, growling viciously, lunged for her, sending the tea table and the teacups flying. The room smelled abruptly of herbs. Rin screamed but evaded her, racing for the door. She pulled it open and found herself in the hallway. Which way led out? Confused, panicked, Rin chose one direction and started that way, running. Saya was clutched to her chest with both arms.

There was a solid, wooden door before her. As she raced to it, microseconds from reaching out to slide it open, the door opened on its own. Bright light from the afternoon outside flooded inward, assaulting Rin's eyes. She gasped and cringed, squinting. There was a shape in the doorway that she would recognize anywhere. Strong, powerful, with long, flowing haori sleeves and fine, elegant fair hair.

"Lord Sesshomaru." She panted, filled with relief. Her knees wobbled beneath her.

He passed through the door, staring down at her with a small frown on his face. "What is going on?"

Rin turned to stare down the hall, searching for the old, gnarled and wrinkled inuyoukai woman. "There was a…" she paused, taking a deep breath as she realized that the corridor was empty and there was no sound other than her own rough breathing. "An old woman…"

Sesshomaru's small expression deepened into a fuller show of his displeasure. He glided past her smoothly and moved down the hallway until he'd reached the tea room. The door was open and he paused, peering inside slowly. His gait stiffened slightly and Rin heard him speak, calling, "Jaken."

The toad moaned loudly and Rin made out the faint sounds of the little youkai moving, trying to walk. Apparently his attempt failed because he cursed violently after clattering to the floor loudly. His leg had smashed against the wall at an awkward angle, splintering the small bones.

Sesshomaru moved back out of the door way and faced Rin, staring at her through the space of the hall. But then Rin saw his eyes change, focusing on something behind her. She turned quickly to face it and found herself staring at Ginrei, Sesshomaru's wife. The young inuyoukai woman smiled at her, though the brightness of the light outside leached the colors from her face, casting it in heavy shadow.

Rin stepped backward, grimacing as if she'd been hit. Saya squalled in her arms, upset.

"Find the maids." Sesshomaru called, speaking to Ginrei.

The inuyoukai woman blinked, her attention brought gradually from Rin toward her husband. "What?"

"Find the maids." Sesshomaru repeated, shortly. He glanced to Rin and called her name. "Rin. Stay beside me."

Stiffly, Rin moved past Ginrei, avoiding looking at the other woman. As Sesshomaru stepped back into the tea room and Rin took a position in the doorway, Ginrei followed her, cautiously.

"What happened?" Ginrei asked, gently whispering.

Rin was caught off guard by the question, by the other woman's directness. She found herself staring at Ginrei openly, examining her. Her eyes were warm and a startling silver color that Rin had taken for blue from a distance. Gold and silver, Sesshomaru and Ginrei. The match was oddly perfect, despite the strangeness of its origins. Again Rin felt the bubble of unpleasantness, of jealousy and resentment, flowing through her.

"Someone attacked Jaken." She answered, stiltedly.

Ginrei's face twisted with alarm and confusion. "Who?"

Rin turned away, staring at the floor and feeling Saya's little breath on her. "I don't know. Get the maids." She ordered, tersely.

Ginrei disappeared without another word. Knowing the palace well, she swiftly brought the maids back to the tea room to help splint Jaken's leg.

The old woman, En, had disappeared.

* * *

A/N: Well finally! I updated!!! wWOOOT! Sorry for my unusually long absence. My excuses? Writer's block. I didn't touch any bit of writing for at least a week or maybe more. My reasons for that? I had a fight with my boyfriend two weeks ago, then saw him a few days later...of course while there I didn't write anything either, but for different emotional reasons...eh yeah...and then this past week I was anxious and mildly depressed because I came back from seeing my boyfriend to my room and my roommate who doesn't shower much or brush her teeth and her armpits rival a man's at times. So yeah, and I am slightly OCD, so I like to believe the ppl around me are clean and knowing that her toothbrush is in the closet...that bothers me...a LOT... So that is why I was late. I hope that my description of my suffering makes up for it a little...maybe? please? 


	31. For Vengeance

A/N: Well here's hoping I can update on time for all of you…phew…NOTICE! This chapter came out _exceptionally_ messy. As in there is a lot of violence, a lot of blood in the end. I WARNED you now…

Disclaimer: No I don't own Inuyasha. Just my fish, but he's like my boyfriend's partly too, kinda like our son, except I'm always feeding and changing his water. Grrr…

* * *

Last Chapter: The old healer said that Ginrei was almost ready to have her daughter. Sesshomaru was summoned and an interesting confrontation of sorts took place between Sesshy and En. Sesshomaru told Rin he was leaving but she refused to be left behind. Sess gave in and took her and Saya to Naishougoto. Rin met Ginrei in a roundabout sort of way. Ginrei feels a connection with her because their daughters will be sisters. While Rin was with Jaken, ogling Saya, En entered the room and broke the toad's leg. She would've done worse to Rin and Saya, but Rin ran, right into Sesshomaru. En was nowhere to be found.

* * *

**For Vengeance**

Another day dawned, this one misty and likely to rain. Sesshomaru was the first up to witness it. The sunrise was orange beyond the clouds, burning fitfully at the mists that tried to shroud the forest, the gardens, and the lake. The koi in their pond were restless, their fins broke the otherwise smooth and tranquil water, rippling it.

The clouds thickened with surprising and fierce quickness. The sky was gloomy and heavy with the promise of rain. Sesshomaru didn't leave the palace—not because he was intimidated by the threat of a little rain, but because the old inuyoukai woman was still missing, seemingly vanished into the gloomy, rain-ridden air. As long as her presence threatened Rin and Saya and even Jaken, Sesshomaru wouldn't leave. And until Ginrei gave birth to his second daughter, Sesshomaru was honor-bound to stay.

Rin woke secondly, partly because Sesshomaru was moving. To keep watch on her, Sesshomaru had taken up residence in the same room with her. They didn't share a bed, actually they never truly had, even before he'd married Ginrei and created the rift between them. Sesshomaru was more a creature of distance and solitude. They slept in the same bed often, but generally only with a physical need; whether it was an innocent need for contact and closeness, or more often a sexual desire.

Rin and Sesshomaru's relationship was very different from the one that Inuyasha and Kagome shared. Just as individuals differ, so too do their interpersonal relations. Inuyasha might complain loudly about the goings-on in his bowels or any other highly personal, crude thing—and he would do it unabashedly to Kagome and without much fear of reprimand. Sesshomaru meanwhile, was not only never going to speak of something like that; he was also _not_ human, so his body and his thoughts worked on a very different level than even his half-brother's. Rin was accustomed to Sesshomaru and, having known him all her life, found Inuyasha and Kagome's relationship to be odder than her own.

After Sesshomaru had left the room they shared, Rin had stirred and fed Saya. Maids arrived to attend her, newly awake themselves, blearily wiping the crust from their eyes and blinking away the sleep. They offered Rin a bath and offered to help care for Saya but Rin turned them down. She'd had a bath the night before after the ordeal in the tea room. She sent the maids away and dressed herself, wearing the same robes that she'd been wearing the previous day. The maids had suggested that she could burrow some of Ginrei's. Ginrei was taller than Rin by quite a lot, but with kimono that hardly mattered, height was adjusted for at the waist, making one size fit all. But Rin wasn't interested in wearing Sesshomaru's wife's clothing.

She stayed awake with Saya, sitting on the balcony where, although she could never know it, Sesshomaru had sat roughly nine months ago, tormented with animal desire on the night when his full-blooded daughter had been conceived. She also could not know that Sesshomaru and Ginrei had not consummated their physical relationship more than that one time. Her thoughts were as heavy as the rainclouds in the sky.

Saya was fussy, sleepy and yet unable to fall asleep. In the weeks since her birth she had become much more alert to her surroundings. Her golden eyes were bright and alert when she wasn't trying to sleep or wasn't crying. The discoloration in her forehead, the crescent moon, had darkened and taken on its full dimensions. There were no markings on her cheeks, in that way her hanyou nature was evident: Inuyasha lacked the same markings himself while inheriting his father's hair color and eye color.

Rin let Saya suckle on her fingertips. The baby was calmed and lulled by this. Her eyes drifted gradually closed, her arms and legs loosened.

Sesshomaru did not join her on the balcony, but instead left her to her thoughts. Respect for her might've been one argument he could've made for his distance, but the true reason was out of the memories that the balcony represented for him. Memories he wished to avoid. Naishougoto had become a place of awkwardness for him. He kept guards posted at the doors, watching for the old inuyoukai woman, and he stayed continually alert, ready to sniff out her presence if it winked into the palace itself.

Ginrei didn't wake for some time. By mid morning the maids roused, bathed, and slowly dressed her. It was nearly noon before Sesshomaru met his exhausted wife in the same battered tea room. Ginrei appeared exhausted. She was dressed lightly, in gold and cream colors, but even those light colors seemed to wash out her complexion. The mark of nobility over her cheeks, which in her case was white, had faded almost completely away. Her eyes drooped and every motion she made was slow, tired.

Miso soup was brought, as well as some rice. (A/N: I actually looked it up; traditional Japanese breakfast is miso soup and can include rice. They really do eat a lot of rice!) Sesshomaru wasn't interested in the food, and, it appeared, that Ginrei had no appetite to speak of either.

"You are not hungry?" he asked her when she barely even motioned for the soup or the rice. It was beginning to grow cold, steaming unnoticed into the air.

She shook her head faintly and swallowed thickly. "No."

"Are you unwell?" Sesshomaru asked, carefully.

Her shoulders managed to sag a little lower. "This is normal, Lord Sesshomaru."

As if he could lead by example, Sesshomaru took the chopsticks in his hand and poked curiously at the rice. It was pleasant, still warm on his tongue.

Ginrei was staring at him, her jaw moved, pressing her lips into a tight line and then releasing them again as she struggled to find the right words and the energy needed to say them. "I can't understand why En attacked Jaken."

Sesshomaru pressed the chopsticks firmly into the rice and left them there, placing his hand back into his lap sedately. "Tell me about her. Who was she?"

Ginrei gave a feeble shake of her head. "I don't know."

"Was she a member of Nishiyori's clan?" Sesshomaru watched Ginrei carefully, his golden eyes narrowed.

"I don't know." Ginrei released a long, exhausted breath. "Please, I'm exhausted…"

"You may go." Sesshomaru told her, coldly.

She bowed weakly and rose to her feet, moving slowly, unsteadily away. Her girth was greater than Rin's had been, and somehow Ginrei, an inuyoukai woman trained to be a dancer, an artist, eloquent in every way, was less graceful in her pregnancy than Rin had been. In spite of everything that had happened to her while she was carrying Saya inside her, Rin had been strong, powerful, and elegant. Ginrei didn't have the same poise. The beginning of her pregnancy had been healthy and peaceful, even beneficial. The second half was wearying, draining her of everything.

The child inside her was drawing strength, flexing her unused muscles. Perhaps she was even taking a deeper, spiritual strength from Ginrei, something that Ginrei didn't have much of. Perhaps Rin in comparison had an overabundance of that strength. Perhaps that was why Saya could be born a month or so early and still survive and thrive.

The maids came and worked skittishly, removing the uneaten food and vanishing. Sesshomaru stayed inside the room, waiting for something to change, something to break or bend…

* * *

The sound of baby cries woke Ginrei. She had lied down on her futon just after leaving Sesshomaru in the tea room, but now, some unknown amount of time later, she found herself snapped wide awake and alert. She was still fully clothed, her hair still pinned up neatly. During her sleep she had barely moved. She slept, as she had for months now, like a log. Even nightmares couldn't rouse her from whatever position she'd fallen asleep in.

Yet now she was alert, even breathing fast as if danger were waiting just outside her room. The child's crying entranced her. Ginrei hauled herself from her futon and stumbled toward the door, sliding it open. She hadn't closed it herself, but the maids must've done it while she slept.

Light spilled in faintly from a screen. Ginrei heard the pitter-patter of rain pouring down outside. It was impossible for Ginrei to tell if the light was afternoon or evening. Had she been sleeping an hour or much more than that?

The baby's crying drew her through the hallway. She laid her hands on the screen door across from her own bedroom and slid it open. The room inside was chilled, a wind passed through it. It opened to the balcony and Ginrei could see the splatter of rain outside, pouring from the eaves, trickling musically.

Crouched on one futon—there were two in this room but one had been made up and stored away back in its closet—was a woman, sleepily fumbling with her robes, trying to open them to nurse the screaming baby. It was Rin, looking a little messier than Ginrei likely did. Her hair was long and flowing, a dark, deep ebony.

When Ginrei slid open the door, she glanced up, startled. Then her gaze took in just which inuyoukai had opened the door and looked in on her and her expression hardened. She shifted, leaving her robes alone, letting the baby cry with her hunger unabated.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded, the snarl in her voice barely hidden, if at all.

"Her crying…" Ginrei gestured weakly at the squalling infant. "It woke me."

"I'll feed her if you'll leave." Rin told her, bitterly.

Ginrei took a step back, but didn't let go of the door. Rin's gaze on her was hard, glimmering wetly in the dark, gloomy room. The wind blew at the balcony, driving in the rain, splattering Ginrei's face faintly. Ginrei frowned, seizing upon that to start speaking. "Shouldn't you close those doors? The draft and the rain…"

"This is my room." Rin snapped, "I'll do what I want in it."

Ginrei felt her body stiffening though she fought it. "Lord Sesshomaru has given me this palace, so this room is as much mine as it is yours, Lady Rin." She swallowed, cringing a little when Rin's face changed, darkening with menace. "I was only thinking of you and your child's health."

"I don't need you to think for me." Rin answered briskly.

"I wasn't suggesting that…" Ginrei sighed, wearily. "Please, I don't want to be your enemy. I…" she halted, cautious, uncertain, and then plunged forward, licking her lips, "If what I've been told about you is true, then you and I are very much the same."

Rin stared at her, apparently speechless, unable to form another insult or unsubtle suggestion that Ginrei beat a hasty retreat. Her baby continued to cry and, moved by frustration, Rin shifted her daughter, trying to quiet her. It did little good.

"Jaken has told me that Lord Sesshomaru rescued you as a young girl. He has told me that you have no living family." She faltered slightly, feeling a sudden surge of emotion at the memory of her own lost family. "It is the same with me."

"We're nothing alike." Rin told her, so quietly that the words barely reached Ginrei over her baby's wailing. "My family was human, yours was inuyoukai."

"Does that really matter so much?" Ginrei asked, gently.

Rin stared at her for a time with angry, narrowed eyes. Ginrei wasn't sure why, what nerve had she touched? She longed for Rin to open up to her. She was a mortal woman with an inuyoukai ruler wrapped around her pinky finger…

"You must forgive me; I have never learned your child's name." Ginrei gestured to the screaming baby and took a step closer into the room. "I'm curious, what will become of her?"

Rin sat back, blinking as if Ginrei had slapped her across the face. "That is none of your concern. Leave, now."

Another nerve struck, another offence written into Rin's book regarding Ginrei. She felt her strength leaving her again, draining away to the floor or evaporating into the air like the splatter from the rainstorm outside. "I'm sorry, Lady Rin. I was just…" she stammered and started over, "My own daughter…" she rested one hand over her swollen belly, "Sesshomaru has left her to me alone. He…hasn't claimed her. I have chosen her name; she will be my daughter, not his."

Rin wasn't meeting her eye any longer. She adjusted her baby and pushed her thumb into the infant's open, toothless mouth. The baby fell silent, suckling fruitlessly for a moment before turning her face away and resuming her howling. Now Rin ground out, "You sound like that's the way you want it."

"It is." Ginrei murmured, "I have no family left. Just her…" her hand was still placed over her belly protectively, lovingly.

Rin scowled and glanced up at her again. Her mouth opened, curled in a vicious, menacing snarl. "Get out!"

Ginrei cringed but didn't withdraw. "Please, Lady Rin…"

"I don't want to talk to you!" Rin shouted, baring her teeth fiercely. The baby in her arms kicked and screamed louder, as if backing up her mother's anger.

Ginrei breathed in once, sharply. "There is no reason why we can't try to be friends." She stared at the anger, the bitter resentment in the other woman's face and felt her own exhaustion acutely, the heaviness of her limbs and her belly, and her heart added to the weight. An ache began low in her body, a strange thing she couldn't place…unpleasant…

"I can't talk to you." Rin bit out, half choking on the words. For the first time wetness touched her eyes, cascading down her cheeks, but with one hand she wiped at it, forcing the weakness away. "Leave me. Can't you see she's hungry?"

Slowly Ginrei nodded. "Please, I've heard the maids talking of her. They say she is very beautiful. Can I see her?" the baby was held close to Rin and wrapped in swaddling and robes to keep her warm and to act as a diaper of sorts. The baby's features were hard, if not impossible to make out.

Rin hesitated and then, "No."

Ginrei's shoulders fell defeatedly. "May I at least hear her name?" she swallowed at the lump in her throat, frowned at the strange, swelling feeling in her abdomen. "She is my daughter's sister."

There was another long pause and then Rin said, "Her name is Saya."

Ginrei smiled, genuinely, and felt heat tinge her face and burning tears cloud her eyes. "A beautiful name, I'm sure as beautiful as she is."

Rin seemed to sit up a little more, as if inflating herself with strength or pride. "Lord Sesshomaru named her."

Ginrei's mouth fell open with surprise and then closed into a tight but warm smile. "He has claimed her as his own." She nodded as if passing approval, "It is only right considering she is the child of his mate, a chosen child, a favored one."

These words seemed to affect Rin, her face changed, softening, easing slightly. She turned her attention away from Ginrei and back to Saya, offering the angry baby another finger to suckle on. "Please, she's very hungry now…" she muttered.

This time Ginrei nodded and gave a small, weak, awkward bow. "Thank you, Lady Rin."

Rin didn't answer as Ginrei slid the door shut and stepped back into the hallway, breathing deeply. The sounds from inside the room changed from the continual screaming of Saya to only the rush of the wind and the pitter patter of the rain on the balcony. Human milk and hormones reached Ginrei's sensitive nosed and she stumbled back slightly, bumping into the wall of her own room. Hunger hadn't returned to her, in fact she felt a little sick. The pressure had swarmed inside her body, growing, changing…

She propped herself up with one hand as the pressure changed, abruptly transforming into knife-sharp pain, curling around her swollen belly, cutting deep into her. Ginrei gasped without actually drawing a breath—her mouth hung open, her eyes were wide, but she made no sound. Something moved inside her, not the child but a sickly warm liquid, moving like a parasite within her.

In that moment Jaken was helping himself up the stairs, grunting and whining with each hobbled step. As he reached the top, panting and rank with sweat, the toad noticed Ginrei's strange position and her panicked face. Quickly he pulled himself up and, using a crutch that one of the humans had found for him, some stick from the woods, hurried over to her.

"Lady Ginrei? Lady Ginrei! What is the matter with you?"

But he had his answer as scent wafted to him and as his eyes took her in—a clear fluid had begun to dribble onto the hard wood floor between Ginrei's legs, pooling around her ankles. He squawked and moved back from her, alarmed. "Lord Sesshomaru!" he called, helplessly. There was no place for a toad in such proceedings, and the toad knew no other course of action in such a frazzled moment.

Ginrei regained her breath and straightened. Stepping backward she saw the liquid at her feet and grimaced disgustedly. Her hands shook as she dug at the folds of her kimono, trying to spare it.

A maid came running and led her into her bedroom, kneeling to clean up the mess Ginrei had left in the hallway. When Sesshomaru arrived his keen sense of smell told him what had happened without any need to see the liquid evidence. As Jaken prostrated himself pathetically, Sesshomaru cursed the old inuyoukai En for abandoning them in this most inauspicious time. Sesshomaru wasn't able or willing to help Ginrei give birth…

The maid knelt on the floor, sopping up the evidence of Ginrei's approaching labor, drew Sesshomaru's attention. "You." He called to her. "Leave for the nearest village and bring a midwife." It would be a human midwife, a bad thing, but it couldn't be avoided now. Their inuyoukai healer had fled.

The maid scurried away and Sesshomaru followed her with Jaken limping afterwards, still jabbering in his panic and horror. But as they reached the foyer all three of them stopped, hearing a screech and a heavy splash outside. The screen door rolled open and, where a guard should've been posted, En stood, snarling in at them through her massively wrinkled face. She had tossed the guard aside without any trouble into the lake. He huffed and struggled to breathe now, swimming for shore outside.

"Old one." Sesshomaru addressed her, slipping past the startled maid. "Leave now or I will kill you."

En grunted thickly and hawked, as if she would spit, but instead swallowed the offensive gunk back down her throat with a grimace. "You won't kill me now, Inutaisho's son. Lady Ginrei's time has come, hasn't it? You need me." She grinned at him from a mask of wrinkles.

"Do not be so confident, old one." Sesshomaru told her, deeply, warningly. At his side his hand flexed, the claws lengthening dangerously. The tips of his fingers glowed greenly, revealing his poison. "Who are you?"

En made a deep grunting sound and sniffed. "What makes you believe you can intimidate me, young one?" she gave one short, mirthless laugh. "I was old before your father was born. I have nothing to fear in death. I have only one true mission to complete before I leave this world and it's waiting for me upstairs."

"Nevertheless hag, I will kill you unless you tell me who you are." Sesshomaru kept his voice level and even, but he lifted his hand up for her feeble eyes to see clearly as a threat.

"Then you will kill me and Lady Ginrei may birth you a useless daughter and die. You cannot care for her—do not dare sully her with a _mortal._" She cleared her throat and spat to one side, aiming for the lake. Sesshomaru's keen ears didn't fail to miss the wet plop it made as it landed in the lake.

For a moment Sesshomaru was silent, unmoving. Then Jaken spoke up, huffing, "My lord! Please! This is preposterous! She must be killed!"

En gave a cackle at his words and strode forward. She was hunched and limping and her hands moved without threat at her side. She had no fear of Sesshomaru or of Jaken or any of the maids. She might've bumped right into Sesshomaru's poison and clawed fingertips and they wouldn't have fazed her. Before she could come within touching distance of him, Sesshomaru stepped aside, giving the old hag room to pass by unmolested.

"My lord!" Jaken squealed, terrified and outraged.

"Let her pass." Sesshomaru ordered, stiffly. To the old woman he glared meaningfully. "You will be watched at all times."

En cackled again and twisted her head around, craning it until she could stare up at him. "And when I'm done you can kill me, of course." She grinned at him, leering.

Something like disgust flowed over Sesshomaru's face, but the micro-expression was overwhelmed by another feeling—bafflement, intrigue. Who was the old woman? He felt a slow, growing sense of alarm as he realized that this old woman would be waiting over his wife's bedside, she would bring his first full blooded child into the world. What would she do to her? For a moment his fist clenched, his claws called for blood…and then the old hag passed by him and the cowering maid and the shuddering, enraged Jaken. She headed, limping, for the stairs.

Jaken raced forward and prostrated himself. The little toad's body was shaking ferociously. "My lord! Please! This is a grave mistake! That old hag cannot be trusted!" he looked up with his huge, yellow eyes, frantic. "She wanted to kill Rin! And she almost did kill me!"

"Calm yourself Jaken." Sesshomaru murmured. _After Ginrei's child has been born, I will kill her._

* * *

Inuyoukai labor was very different from human labor. Ginrei's body changed swiftly, giving itself over to the muscle contractions and pain of labor. As nightfall swept over the palace, and the rain continued to pour down outside, Ginrei was already nearing the impending time of birth.

Sesshomaru, as he had done with Rin, now found himself standing guard once more over the birth of his second daughter. This time his presence was not for the laboring female, it was for the midwife. En worked grouchily with the maids until most of them were dismissed completely. Then she spent a great deal of her time glaring at Sesshomaru, as if longing for him to die on the spot or perhaps just step out of the room. Sesshomaru failed to grant those desires time and time again.

At first Ginrei was alarmed to find En waiting on her. Just as Rin had been, Ginrei was alarmed at the old woman's attack on Jaken, and full of disapproval. Yet as her labor progressed so swiftly, and emptied her of her energy, Ginrei ceased to care who brought the cool strips of cloth to place on her forehead, or who offered her something to drink for her parched lips, or who sopped up the blood flowing out of her. In spite of her mysterious nature, En was a healer, she was a midwife. She was calm while Ginrei bled, and she could read the signs of the labor well.

To calm the bleeding, to even take the edge off the pain, En had herbs to offer to Ginrei. The maids brought her bowls and the old inuyoukai mashed and sliced the dried leaves with her own clawed fingertips. She cared for Ginrei tenderly, without any show of potential violence and without hesitation. In fact there was almost affection in her motions, in her rough, gravelly old voice. She yelled at the maids if they said something aloud about the blood, as if concerned that their words would alarm Ginrei. When they spoke too loudly while Ginrei as resting, she would dismiss them. If Sesshomaru had spoken she might've tried to do the same, but the inuyoukai lord remained silent as a statue made of stone.

At long last, as the moon rose outside, and Ginrei's latest contraction passed, Sesshomaru at last did speak, his own voice deep and raspy. "Old one."

The hag looked up, sneering at him through the darkness.

"You belonged to the Nishiyori clan." It was not posed as a question, but as an observation.

The old woman made a sharp growling sound and didn't answer him. Ginrei made a noise, drawing in a breath as pain raced through her body again. En leaned over her, counting and murmuring orders to the laboring woman to breathe. When Ginrei fell limp again, breathing fast, her eyes closed and her body covered in sweat, En grunted, making her characteristic noise, and looked up at Sesshomaru, meeting his amber gaze. "There is an herb I need that I don't have. I must search for it. The child is coming soon, before the hour is out."

She groaned, hefting herself onto her feet and limping toward the closed door. Sesshomaru also got up, following her without a word. The old hag would not be allowed to roam freely, without supervision.

En glared briefly at him when she saw that he was following her, but made no protest aloud. She passed into the hallway, leaving the door open. Sesshomaru closed it after he left, leaving Ginrei inside panting heavily, already preparing for another contraction. She whimpered inside the room, trying to speak their names, to call for company. She recognized, even in the thick of her labor, that her midwife and her husband, and even the maids, had all left her. Sesshomaru hesitated, feeling something that might've been pity, but then he saw that En had already reached the stairs and was hobbling down them in her hunched, unsteady way. He left the door and moved silently after her, as if gliding more than walking.

En led the way, hunched over but moving with surprising swiftness. There was a strength in her body that she worked to hide, but her speed and energy, and her steady hands as she'd worked with Ginrei, had all betrayed her to Sesshomaru's hawk-like eyes. She left him behind as she crossed the gardens, not using any trails but rather cutting across the wet grass and skirting around dripping decorative bushes.

The night was dark but mist had risen above the ground, hovering like ghosts. Sesshomaru's keen eyesight made out the ripples in the mists where En had passed and then caught sight of the long, round shapes her feet had made, pressing down the rich, wet grass. He followed her silently, intently. He spotted her a short distance away, heard her grumbling and snarling to herself, then saw her push into the thick underbrush of the forest.

Sesshomaru started after her, only to halt abruptly. The old hag's aura had changed, flickering out of existence for a moment before reappearing. Alarm made Sesshomaru's eyes widen, his heart picked up and his clawed hand flexed, readying his claws for a very necessary kill.

The old hag had stepped into the forest and disappeared. She wasn't searching for an herb in the darkness underneath the canopy; she had winked out and brought herself back into the palace in an instant…

_Rin…_

* * *

As Sesshomaru had followed En out of the castle, Ginrei had begun to call out, harshly, her breath ragged, her voice unclear and impossible to understand. Rin woke the sounds and blinked through the darkness. The wind and rain of earlier had calmed, though Rin had long since closed the screen door to the balcony. It trickled comfortingly outside, steady and calm.

Rin's dreams had been dark, bloody, and exhausting. She remembered well her own labor, the miko woman bustling at her side, the panic she had sometimes glimpsed in the other woman's eyes. Death had hovered close, waiting to wrap its arms around her in a cold, uncaring embrace. She had revisited those horrors in her dreams, tormented by Ginrei's cries across the hall. Part of her would've gone to help Ginrei, but she stayed with Saya instead, knowing that Sesshomaru was inside with her—though that was odd—and they'd found a midwife. Rin hadn't seen who it was, but she hadn't had much interest in it either.

Air puffed against Rin's cheek and she blinked, reminded at once of the kitsune child, Shippo that Inuyasha and Kagome had kept like a son…

Too late she saw the shadow on the wall, the snakelike strike of an arm reaching for her. She twisted her head, trying to see, opened her mouth to speak, and found a strong, dirty hand wrapped around her mouth, squashing her lips. Her eyes widened, her hands lifted and fought at once. The flesh she touched was damp and cold, as if not living at all. And it was covered in wrinkles. Even in the darkness she recalled the smell of the old hag, and, as En moved more directly into her line of vision, she saw the woman's outline, not hunched as she had been while working docilely beside the laboring Ginrei, but upright and proud and strong. A dealer of death and judgment.

Rin struggled to breathe, trying to cry out beyond the press of the old woman's hand. Then she realized that the woman's hand didn't stink as she'd thought it had—the smell was actually a pungent, rich odor of herbs. In the same instant Rin felt dizziness swarm in her mind, the darkness of the room enclosed over her vision, growing exponentially.

Saya whimpered where Rin had left her on one side of her futon and Rin fought, pawing at En's face. But her hands were weak and feeble now, weaker than Ginrei's exhausted limbs in the other room. The darkness won out, Rin couldn't stop breathing, and couldn't stop her lungs from absorbing the toxins. Her head lulled limply to one side, her arms fell uselessly.

En withdrew her hand quickly and reached for one of Rin's wrists. She pushed the claw of her forefinger into Rin's flesh, piercing it and drawing blood swiftly to the surface. She rolled her claw in the ooze of the blood, collecting a wad of the clotting stuff in the curve of her claw, then released Rin's wrist uncaringly, letting it fall to the futon.

Her attention moved to Saya. Her green eyes narrowed with disgust but she wasted no time before she'd scooped up the child and carted her off.

She flung open the sliding door and crossed the hallway where Ginrei was crying out, frantically, shouting half names that were indistinguishable. When she opened the door and entered Ginrei's room the other woman quieted, breathing harshly. Her panting stole her words away, but her look of panic was clear enough.

The contraction came on then and Ginrei huffed, whimpering. Her hands fisted in the bed sheets, blood was fast pooling between her legs though the bed sheets covered her from prying eyes. En scuttled forward to the bed and knelt near her, still holding baby Saya tightly against her. The old hag's face was set, amidst her wrinkles, in a desperate snarl. She bared her teeth at Ginrei, as if threatening the laboring woman would speed things up.

"Push, damn you! I don't have any time!" any moment now and Sesshomaru would burst through the doors and descend upon her like the wrathful father he was.

When En had left, leading Sesshomaru away on a wild goose chase, Ginrei's daughter had been crowning. It would take only a few more contractions before the child would at last be out into the world—the newest and last member of the Nishiyori clan. Unclaimed by Sesshomaru the little girl was a last, untouched chance at resurrection.

En moved to the edge of the bed and pulled aside the covers, digging through the blood, reaching between Ginrei's legs to feel for the infant's progress. Ginrei was straining, using every muscle in the core of her body to force the baby out of her. Crying filled the room and for a moment En was confused until she recalled the hanyou she was holding in her arms. Frustrated, she shifted and placed the baby on the far side of Ginrei's futon, leaving the hanyou infant to scream for her unconscious mother and her absent father.

With both hands free now she reached for the child emerging between Ginrei's legs amidst the blood and other fluids of pregnancy. Ginrei made a small noise, a gasp or a cry of pain, and then En found a slick, round surface firmly in her hands. With her gnarled fingertips she clutched the child and dug deeper, gripping the baby's shoulders, twisting them slightly to aid the passage, to speed it into the world.

Ginrei didn't have to push again; her daughter was pulled from her the rest of the way. As Ginrei panted, trying to breathe and focus through the haze of pain that had descended on her, En had already taken the child. She cleaned the new baby frantically, her wrinkled mouth set in a hard, firm line. She cleaned the infant's head of blood and amniotic fluid. The placenta was still intact, binding child and mother together as one.

As Ginrei's baby began to squall, faintly, with her first breaths, En picked Rin's clotted blood from beneath her claw and touched it over the newborn's forehead. Then she reached over the futon for the screaming hanyou infant and lifted a different finger, ready to make the tiny baby bleed.

Ginrei gasped, stirring weakly. "What are you doing? En?" her ears were ringing with both babies screams. In a way these were both her daughters, they were sisters, and this strange inuyoukai woman that had acted as her midwife was threatening them. She recognized Saya's cries, separate from her own daughter's wails. "Rin!" she choked, "Sesshomaru!" courtesies and titles were forgotten in her panic and pain. "Rin! Sesshomaru!"

En turned and glared at her, snarling viciously. "You stupid girl! Why would you call that little bitch and that demon that destroyed your family?"

Ginrei's breath was heavy, rasping, her nose filled with the stink of blood and sweat. "Who are you, En?" she started to cry, though she shouldn't have had the strength or the fluid to waste.

A sound came from the stairway, a rushing sound like the wind, but En was well aware that it wasn't nature that made this wind, it was a fatherly wrath. Gritting her teeth in a vicious smile, the hag reached again between Ginrei;s legs, grabbing up a wad of blood and other bodily fluids, some clotted, some still flowing. She shouted over her fist, "Blood of my brother!"

Sesshomaru reached the doorway. He was not a solid form, but rather a white glow. He materialized swiftly, the white flowing into masses of robes and tendrils of hair. Both doors stood open, one to where En had assaulted Rin, the other to where the babies screamed and Ginrei labored. The mixed scents assaulted Sesshomaru and for just the split second that En needed, he hesitated, torn between where Rin lied unmoving and unconscious, and where En held the babies against him.

En shouted something, incomprehensible, and threw the wad of blood and fluids at Sesshomaru and the doorway. It splattered over the entryway and some landed on Sesshomaru's legs, speckling his fine white robes with brilliant, crimson red.

A red mist leapt from the flooring, dispersing into the air, shrouding the doorway. Beyond it Sesshomaru made a sound like a scream, his deep, powerful voice booming from the walls of the palace, shaking them, rattling the screens and the sliding doors. Yet, despite this rage, he did not appear through the mist, racing in to save Saya, Ginrei, and the newborn.

Ginrei shouted, wailing, "What have you done?"

En turned her green eyes at the younger woman and her gaze leapt, glowing from within. "I have bought us time. It is a barrier he cannot cross until the blood has dried."

Ginrei sat up, desperation fueling her muscles and her exhausted body. "Give me my baby…"

The newborn was still connected by the placenta. As Ginrei sat forward the cord pulled and deep inside her she could still feel the connection. The pain made her stop, gasping as she realized that En hadn't cut the cord yet. If En were to cut the cord incorrectly Ginrei or the baby could bleed to death together, and if she stressed the unbroken connection it could rupture her uterus, again killing her by loss of blood.

En ignored her; she was focused on the newborn and the hanyou child before her. "Just as my family was torn apart, so will his be dishonored. Punishment for his crimes not from outside, but from _within._" Again En reached for Saya pulling the screaming baby roughly toward her and lowering her pinky finger with its corresponding claw to the baby's innocent flesh.

Saya's howling increased several times over, growing higher with sudden, wild reaction to pain, a new experience for her tiny mind to wrap itself around. The cut was over the baby's chest, the infant's own heaving chest impaled her delicate flesh into En's claw. Only a tiny amount of blood was needed, the mark wasn't large, and En seemingly had no true desire to slaughter the hanyou, though by her expression of hatred one would certainly believe that was what she wanted. She dipped her finger in the rising blood and moved it to join the second mark over the screaming newborn's forehead.

"What are you doing! Stop!" Ginrei screamed, reaching frantically for both babies, just out of reach. Her body was weak, sluggish, but she hauled herself better into a sitting position, in spite of the fresh wetness that this movement forced out of her body, in spite of the sickening tension that her motion created on the cord that was still connected to her insides.

En was still speaking down at the screaming newborn, one hand holding the baby, still partially covered in birth fluids and now with two streaks of foreign blood running over her forehead. Her other hand stayed over the baby and had begun to glow a sickly green white, as if poisonous. "You will be the ending for him—_Hanone,_ the Fang. You are bound to the human, bound to half-breed. Where your mother is weak you will be strong…"

She was so completely absorbed in the words that she failed to notice that Ginrei had sat forward and could now reach her…

"…you will destroy the—"

Ginrei's claws raked across En's face, cutting off the old woman's words and splattering her blood. The droplets spilled onto the futon, onto the sheets, and onto both babies as well as onto Ginrei herself. The force of Ginrei's desperate blow threw En to the floor. She dropped the newborn onto the sheets.

Beyond the red mist on the doorway, Sesshomaru gave another bone-chilling sound, a cry much more animal than human. The red of the mists faded, lightening. It was losing power, falling away.

En clutched her cheek from the floor, seeing the crimson droplets dripping away. One cheek was torn open with four wide gashes. She snarled at Ginrei, baring her yellowed teeth. The motion made more blood spurt energetically from her wounds. "You fool! You have destroyed your own family now!"

Ginrei was crying, her chest heaving. Blood dribbled from the claws of one hand. She reached with her clean hand for her daughter, cuddling the infant close. As she pressed her cheek to her daughter's head the blood streaks, Rin's and Saya's, mixed and smeared onto her face. Her teary, red rimmed silver eyes gazed past her daughter, burning with rage at the old hag. "What were you doing to her?" she demanded, her breath ragged.

En gave a mirthless grin. There was blood over her teeth now, staining the yellow with red. "A prophecy, little fool. You have befriended our family's killer; I was ensuring that Hanone will not fail where you have."

Ginrei reached for Saya as well, trying to comfort both crying babies. She choked, hiccupping with horror and grief. "Who _are_ you?"

En lifted her face and pulled her hand from her cheek, revealing the gash in all its ugliness. Her own face was twisted meanly; it was hard to imagine that she had ever been anything but the old, bitter, crazy hag, bent on vengeance. "My brother created the clan you were born to, girl. Long ago, before the humans began writing, before these islands were cut off from the mainland by the sea." She spat the blood in her mouth onto the floor and, mingling with the red drops of her blood, tears fell as well. "And now you have helped _him_ destroy us completely. She was my last chance…"

The mists at the door dispersed, giving way. A white blur spilled into the room, howling like the wind but in a deep, masculine voice. En snarled as the whiteness moved over her in the blink of an eye. A green-glow materialized and struck her, snatching her by the neck, pushing her back against the wall. En didn't bring her hands up to fight the inevitable. The poison burned through her veins, making her body snap rigidly and convulse. Her green eyes were wide, and unseeing.

Sesshomaru released her just as quickly in a slashing motion. More blood flew wild, arterial sprays of it splashed on the wall and then on the floor as the old inuyoukai's body fell to the floor, already dying.

Sesshomaru stood over her body, whole and solid once more. His face was set in an animalistic snarl; his eyes were red like the blood strewn all over Ginrei's bedroom. His teeth were too big for his jaw, fangs poked out viciously from his parted lips. His single hand at his side was covered and dripping with blood.

On the floor En's body continued to bleed, but her life had already been snuffed out. She hadn't fought her fate; it had always been in her plans to die for her attack on Rin and Saya and for her mistreatment of Ginrei and the newborn. But her death had been planned for a cause. The newborn was unmarked, her future completely open. En had seen how Sesshomaru didn't care for Ginrei, that his interest was in a son, not a daughter. The daughter was the perfect way to punish him and to begin anew the lost clan that Sesshomaru had put an end to. A prophecy, a spell, a curse, a binding on the newborn to guide her life. She would hate Rin, she would hate her half-sister, and feel always En's spirit within her, forcing her along a predetermined path of vengeance.

But the spell had not been completed and En died vainly, lost to time and death, to join her brother and their clan, forever.

* * *

A/N: during the Stone Age Japan, as I was told a year or so ago, was connected to the mainland by a series of islands or a small strip of land. The Sea of Japan (I think) was made into a giant round lake. Don't quote me per se but I think that's true, or at least that's the gist of it. So when En says she's old, she's _old._ Like think Ice Age old. Her plan here was to die, but to prophesize Hanone's future as a sort of punisher. She would reject Sesshomaru and embrace her mother's ancestry and become a thorn in his side. En wrapped all that up with a final, nasty blow to Sesshomaru that would involve Hanone killing Saya and Rin, perhaps even Sesshomaru himself. Can he kill his own offspring? It's a difficult question to ask, that's why tearing the family up from the inside out would be especially vicious and terrible revenge. 


	32. Cry A Little For Me

A/N: what will happen now? I had so, so, so, so, so much trouble with this chapter. Ugh. It's been a busy few weeks, midterm bearing down on me and a thousand projects breathing down my neck. Angry with my boyfriend for a personal inter-couple relations reason that I can't relate. Well, angry isn't the right term, irritation is. Uh, what else? Oh yes! I had this nice idea that the babies would be born and boom! Story wraps self up. Don't ask me why I thought that was going to happen. I'm a little lost and I need to hammer out plans with myself, how to end things…how far I will go and if Rin and Sess could even mend things, or if there would be too much time involved to legitimately go through it. Ugh. I'm sure they will, because the core of Rin's character has always been devotion to Sesshomaru. I was looking at fan images and reminded of that again and again. Her devotion touches me because it's so sweet, so perfect…I've muddied and darkened her with age, power, and betrayal. Now, how do I get her back to him, I ask myself, without it becoming a betrayal of her character as I've molded it? Oh stress…

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Sesshomaru. But Hanone, En, Ginrei, and Saya are all mine.

Last Chapter: Ginrei went into labor. En showed up and offered herself as midwife and then led Sesshomaru, who was guarding her, outside. She did her wink in and out of existence trick and wound up back in Rin's room, drugging her to sleep and taking Saya. Ginrei gave birth and En tried to put a spell onto the newborn but failed. Sesshomaru killed her.

* * *

**Cry A Little For Me**

Rin woke with a start, her body snapping taught, every muscle and sinew alert. Her heart leapt inside her ribcage as she opened her eyes and saw light passing through the screens, heard birds chirping merrily outside. Her first thoughts were of Saya, the tiny, squirming daughter, Rin's one true blessing, her only real family…then of the shape of the old hag and the stink of the herbs inside her nasal passageways…

"Saya!" her voice was croaking but loud and full of desperation. She started to sit up and then stopped, hearing a small baby noise, a tiny sleepy whimper.

Panic faded as Rin twisted around and spotted Sesshomaru knelt across the room, but normality hadn't yet been restored to her world. There were _two_ babies under Sesshomaru's watch, one cuddled close to him, the other swaddled and sleeping peacefully on the edge of the futon, not far from Sesshomaru's knees. He was sitting stoically, his eyes closed, almost like a statue, some inuyoukai Buddha.

When Rin moved again, shifting to reach out for the baby that Sesshomaru wasn't holding, he opened his eyes and gazed at her carefully. There was only a small pause before he asked, "You are well?"

Although Rin wasn't even sure of it herself, she nodded and stated the obvious. "Ginrei gave birth."

Sesshomaru assented without speaking aloud. He lifted his arm slightly to signal the child he was holding. "Hanone."

The desperation and maternal worry gave way inside Rin, transforming into an older ache that she recognized and detested but couldn't avoid: bitterness, hurt. Her hands shook as she reached forward and scooped up Saya protectively, clutching her close. Her actions made her look like a starving child, grabbing at morsels of food. As she moved the swaddling aside, checking over Saya's sleepy, sluggish little body, she snapped at her mate in a low, shaky voice. "You must be pleased."

"Pleased?" Sesshomaru responded, dully, almost as if he were fatigued.

"A pure heir for you." Rin spat, darting a quick glance up at him and then directing her eyes past him, at the wall, the dark screen. "What a shame! A perfect shame that she gave you a daughter…"

Sesshomaru budged slightly, sitting more upright. "Rin, stop."

"I will not!" she spat, her shoulders shaking, trembling violently. "You'll go to her again, won't you?"

He didn't answer her, his amber gaze went loose, unfocused, as if he were distracted by something else, a thought, a spider on the wall behind her, or maybe a momentary uncomfortable twinge inside, whether that was guilt or gas could be anyone's guess.

"One girl isn't enough for you—you could care less what it does to me." Rin's voice thickened, her words spilled out fast, like the tears over her cheeks. "I'll never have another, they can never be good enough for you—my babies—and she…she will outlive me. I'll grow old and die and she'll still have you…"

His mouth moved, twisting frowningly. "I am not an object to be possessed."

"Of course not!" Rin snarled. Saya started to whimper waveringly, hearing the sounds in the room, sensing the despair in her mother's voice and also simply irritable at being woken from her sleep. Rin lowered her voice when she spoke again, letting it become a whisper. "No one has ever even touched the surface of your heart."

His golden eyes flashed, lit from within, and landed on her, narrowing into slits. "Do not…"

"You're a monster." Rin's shoulders shook as she turned, clutching Saya close to her chest, and showed her back to him, trying to will herself to stop crying, to push back the frailty, the pain inside her. She focused on Saya through her blurred, bleary vision. The child was Sesshomaru's lookalike, but Rin had found parts of her daughter that she could relate to. Her daughter's smooth, human ears, sticking out a little too far, the round, oval of her face, her darker, honeyed skin color…

"Do not turn your back to me." Sesshomaru murmured, his voice rich and deep.

"Go to your wife." Rin swallowed, half choking on those words. Her heart hammered inside her ears, droning out Saya's little puffing breath against her.

"I am with my mate." He growled, low. "While my mate slept, I kept watch over her, and while she slept, _my wife_ saved my mate's child…"

Rin felt her legs grow cold abruptly, losing strength as her emotions wrought havoc over her body and her mind. "What?"

"The old woman took Saya. _My wife_ stopped her."

Rin searched over her baby's face and pushed aside the swaddling around her little body. The tiny puncture wound on Saya's chest came into view and a new surge of emotion gripped Rin, making her forget the initial rash anger and bitterness toward Sesshomaru. The wound had closed over and, with the remarkable healing power bestowed on her by her part-inuyoukai heritage; the mark was already swiftly fading. Yet, set in the baby's brand new, fragile skin, it was probably scar, leaving a tiny mark forever on her to commemorate what easily could've been a brush with death. How unnerving that Rin could have so little control over her baby…

"What did she want with Saya?" Rin murmured, her voice still thick with tears.

"I do not know." Sesshomaru replied, distantly. The floorboards creaked as he moved and Rin twisted her neck, trying to peer at her mate out of the corner of her eye covertly. He stood at his full regal height, his only arm bent and held close to his body in an awkward way to support the new baby Hanone against him. "I must return to the child to Ginrei."

While he paused, Rin turned, gazing at him openly again as she passed one sleeve over her face, wiping aside the tears. When she examined him directly, Rin saw the crimson splatter of blood on his robes. She'd missed it while he was sitting, having only seen a little of the color at his waist and shoulder. She'd assumed it was ink, but the splatter pattern of it left her with no doubt. "You killed the old woman?"

He ducked his head slightly in a nod. "Yes."

There was a pause, tense and stiff, but just as Sesshomaru took a step forward, moving for the door, Rin broke the silence between them, asking timidly, "How…how is she? How is Ginrei?" she pronounced his wife's name stiffly and with great care.

"Recovering." He answered, blandly. The tiny bundle in his arm squirmed visibly and made a tiny, weak sound.

Rin's brown eyes focused on the bundle intently. "Can I see her?"

"Perhaps," Sesshomaru started slowly, "you would like to take Hanone back to Ginrei."

"No…" Rin shook her head, frowning mildly.

"Then perhaps you would like to accompany me?"

Rin glanced back down at her own baby's soft, innocent face and swallowed uncertainly before nodding. "Yes, I would like that."

* * *

The door to the room where Ginrei usually slept was closed. Rin followed Sesshomaru through the hallway and tried to keep the puzzled look from her face when he passed it and moved toward a different, smaller room closer to the stairs. As far as Rin knew, the room was unused, but now a maid scurried to open the door and bow to one side as Sesshomaru stepped through it, tiny newborn Hanone fitted into the crook of his arm.

Cautiously Rin followed after him, her own baby pressed close to her.

The little room was dark and stuffy. The shutters were drawn shut tightly. The room had a gray look to it whereas the other rooms were a richer color, more of a gold. The matting in the room was older too, not as firm as the pads in the bedroom she'd just left. It squished down as she passed and left imprints of her small feet, of all ten toes, just as the dirt and mud had while she was a child.

Ginrei lied motionless in her bed, her eyes closed and her skin pale. Her silver hair was long, loose, and uncombed. It had a stringy appearance. Rin wondered what Sesshomaru's powerful senses whispered to him of his wife's condition. Rin couldn't make out any scents, not of blood, not of sweat, and not even of milk. Did inuyoukai breastfeed?

Sesshomaru moved without hesitation and knelt at Ginrei's bedside silently. Rin waited behind, caught between the bed and the door, and still standing. Faint light from the hall cast Rin's shadow over the bed sheets and the furs. The door moved on its track, making a small grinding sound, and Rin whirled to face it, startled and on guard. The maid closed the door without noticing, leaving the odd family in relative privacy. For a moment Rin felt her heart pick up speed, as if she were a wild animal, caught inside a cage, a trap that had just sprung. Then she heard Sesshomaru speak in a quiet, gentle voice, calling his wife's name.

She turned to watch the interaction and found that Ginrei was already awake seemingly. Her chest moved up and down slowly, but her eyes, silver like her hair, and sunken in her pale face, were open and gazing at Rin.

"Ginrei." Sesshomaru called her name again and finally the inuyoukai woman turned her head to acknowledge him. Her eyes alighted on Hanone, tucked in her father's single arm. Her hands lifted out of the sheets and reached for the newborn. Sesshomaru handed the baby over without hesitation and then sat back on his haunches, as if withdrawing from her.

Ginrei's face tightened as she pushed herself into a more upright position and examined her child carefully. Her lips parted and her eyes glistened suddenly with tears. The tiny newborn made some small sounds and Rin saw miniature arms, hands, and fingers reaching for Ginrei's face and for locks of her hair. The infant's skin was bright white, almost ghostly.

"She has your markings." Sesshomaru observed, faintly.

Ginrei failed to answer him; she was too absorbed by the newborn in her arms.

Sesshomaru turned to glance at Rin, still standing so awkwardly between the now closed door and Ginrei's bedside. "Rin." He called and, when she met his gaze, he gestured to the opposite side of Ginrei's bed. "Sit."

Stiffly, Rin moved to the indicated position and knelt, feeling the old matting compressing beneath her, almost feeling the whoosh of its stale air. Ginrei had at last taken her eyes off of Hanone and had refocused her attention on Rin. She blinked rapidly a few times and struggled to take a deep breath. "The woman that was meant to help me labor…"

Rin interrupted her tensely. "She took my baby. I already know." She stared at Ginrei and willed the last two words to leave her mouth, but her lips had become immobile, almost as if they were made of stone. She swallowed and lowered her gaze, letting it fall on the newborn and her swaddling instead. "Thank…you."

Ginrei heaved a long, heavy sigh, her shoulders sinking down, deflating with the exhalation. "You're welcome." Her smile was weak; her eyes were still moist with tears. "You have a beautiful child, Lady Rin."

Rin struggled to find words to speak, but none came to her. She wanted to see Hanone, but already knew from what Sesshomaru had said that the newborn looked more like Ginrei than Sesshomaru. The proper response was to thank Ginrei for the compliment, but the words refused to be uttered again and stayed firmly lodged at the back of her throat, glued there. She settled on bowing stiffly, holding Saya awkwardly to try and keep the baby from being jostled.

"I will take leave of you now." Sesshomaru informed his wife, blandly. He rose to his feet and moved toward the door as Ginrei murmured an automatic, uncaring goodbye.

Rin hurriedly got to her feet as well, almost stumbling. Sesshomaru had moved abruptly, almost as if he'd deliberately hoped to leave Rin behind with his wife. Rin felt her face flush with heat as she followed after him, leaving Ginrei alone with her newborn.

* * *

Days began to pass, cool and sunny days. The wind picked up in the night, toward the ending of the week. When Hanone was a week old officially, and her name and parentage had been recorded, Sesshomaru left his wife and his mate at Naishougoto to at last attend to the waiting armies in the Middle Lands. He told Jaken only of where he was going, leaving both his wife and his mate in the dark.

Rin and Ginrei hadn't had to interact very often for most of the week. Ginrei spent much of it recovering the vitality that the last half of her pregnancy had stolen away from her, but by the time of Hanone's naming, Ginrei was up and about and healthy. What little color she had returned to her cheeks and although she still fatigued easily, it was a swift and successful recovery.

Rin watched Ginrei as covertly as she could, though there was little hiding her uncomfortable reaction to Ginrei's presence. Her mate's inuyoukai wife intrigued her as well as filled her with jealousy. She'd come to Naishougoto to see for herself Sesshomaru's ill-acquired breeder, to see how Sesshomaru treated her, how he kept her, and how Ginrei carried herself. Was there love between the two? Was there hatred? Had Sesshomaru forced himself on Ginrei to produce Hanone?

Those questions had all been answered for the most part. Her fears of Sesshomaru's tyranny had been dispelled, and her suspicion of emotion between the couple had few legs to stand on. Ginrei hadn't ever clamored for Sesshomaru's attention. When he left without telling them about it, she hardly noticed that he'd left, just that he'd left Rin behind.

In reality, Sesshomaru and Ginrei seemed to be business partners, regarding one another blandly and dispassionately. It had become a mutual agreement somehow. Rin recalled Ginrei's words concerning Hanone before the child was born: _Sesshomaru hasn't claimed her._ It seemed that, to Ginrei, the true gold in the situation, the light at the end of the tunnel, was her daughter Hanone. The idea of possessing a daughter, an heiress of her own. It wasn't just the mother's words that drew this thought from Rin, it was her near obsession with the infant.

Since Hanone's birth, Ginrei had rarely parted with her baby. Sesshomaru never held the baby, he had on occasion visited her, and inquired of how his wife and child were doing, but other than that he left them both alone. After Hanone's naming, Ginrei moved about the palace with her baby always cradled in her arms. She took Hanone into the gardens and onto balconies and sat with the baby silently, or sometimes Rin observed her lips moving, as if speaking to herself. She wished she had the ears of an inuyoukai, what was Ginrei saying? Was it useless babble to a baby that couldn't understand? Or was it something meaningful?

During their week stay and beyond, Sesshomaru had sent for Rin's clothes to be sent to Naishougoto for a time because Rin refused to share any clothing with Ginrei, too proud and too bitter. When her clothes arrived, Ginrei watched Rin with renewed interest, drawn by the rich robes that Rin had accumulated in her time being pampered by her mate. Often she looked just about to speak, but never actually did. Rin had little doubt that Ginrei's words would be complimentary. In spite of Rin's hostility, Ginrei didn't return it; in fact she tried to diffuse it.

One late morning Rin drank tea with Jaken, who was still recovering from his broken leg, when Ginrei, who'd been outside before, slid open the door and stepped in unannounced. Rin stiffened though she worked to keep her face neutral and uncaring.

Ginrei was dressed in a robe embroidered with orange flowers and yellow and black honeybees. Her silver hair was pinned up high and regally. The color had returned to her cheeks, making her appear lively. The markings of nobility were white, a single stripe over each cheek unlike Sesshomaru's two purple-red marks. She settled into a spot at the table and smiled warmly at both Jaken and Rin.

Jaken at once began talking to her, forgetting what he'd been telling Rin about to plunge into greeting Ginrei. "Hello my lady! You look magnificent today! How is Hanone?" the toad's terms were heavy with respect and fondness, and he even tried to bow, but his splinted leg made the task nearly impossible.

"I'm fine." Ginrei replied. As was normal, Hanone was tucked into the crook of one arm. As she sat down she lowered the baby onto her lap and let Hanone look around. The baby had her father's white hair in a thick little tuft on her head, but her eyes were silver-blue, like Ginrei's, and the marks over her cheeks were the same milky white as Ginrei's as well, though instead of a single mark over her cheeks, baby Hanone had two like Sesshomaru. The mark of the crescent moon was missing entirely.

Like Ginrei, Rin had Saya with her, perched in her lap. Rin's kimono was covered with falling leaves. They were gold, yellow, orange, and bright red. Saya wore yellow and she hated every moment of it and continually found ways of freeing one arm or of loosening her sash and slipping out of the little robe altogether.

Ginrei watched Saya from across the table, smiling genuinely. "She looks so much like Lord Sesshomaru. You must be very proud."

Rin nodded curtly. "I am."

Jaken made a noise of nervousness and began jabbering about the tea's poor quality. The toad understood the unease between the women, but wished he didn't and refused to be part of it.

When Jaken paused the off-the-top-of-his-head rant, Ginrei cleared her throat and interrupted him. "Lady Rin—I thought you would want to know, though I'm sure Lord Sesshomaru would disapprove of my sharing this with you, but there is a kitsune messenger outside looking for you."

Rin blinked and stared at Ginrei blankly. "What?"

"It's a young kitsune messenger. He says his name is Shippo." Ginrei cocked her head to one side and frowned, "He seemed entirely too interested in you and Saya—and in Hanone too." Her hands moved more protectively around her tiny daughter.

"Shippo…" Rin repeated the name, her brown eyes still wide.

Jaken, smarter than he looked, was already putting two and two together. "That name's familiar—but Rin! You mustn't go out there! What would Lord Se…"

But already Rin had gotten to her feet and was heading for the door. Jaken called after her frantically and tried to get up but his leg tripped him and he fell clumsily with a cry. He muttered things under his breath, cursing Rin as if she were a troublesome little girl again. "Ginrei! Hurry! Go after her!"

Ginrei nodded and left the room silently, her bare feet whispering over the floorboards.

* * *

It was bright and sunny outside, with only a slight wind to stir the leaves on the trees. A few of them were beginning to turn rapidly, the edges dying and curling as the color left them and the tree abandoned them, turning inward as it sensed the approaching winter. Rin slipped on some sandals as she left the palace and trudged across the bridge crossing the lake that Naishougoto was built on. She kept Saya huddled close to her and scanned the lake shore and the other side of the bridge carefully.

Movement caught her eye. To the right was the small, trickling stream that fed the little pond with its colorful koi inside. The pond was obscured partly from view by a small hill, a little grassy knoll that was still bright and lush from the summertime. Something flashed, lifting into the air and then falling again beyond the knoll, out of Rin's sight.

Rin halted, watching for the thing, whatever it was, to reveal itself. If it had the ears of a youkai then it would've heard her crossing the bridge.

"Lady Rin?" Ginrei's voice called, faintly from across the bridge.

Irritably Rin turned and glared back over the distance. Ginrei had slipped back into her sandals as well and was crossing the bridge. "What are you doing?" Rin demanded.

Ginrei reached her side passively and gave a little bow. "You shouldn't be out here alone."

"I know a fox named Shippo." Rin told her, stepping off the bridge confidently.

"What if it's a shape-shifter?" Ginrei countered, "What would Lord Sesshomaru do if he were to lose Lady Rin." Her voice lowered meaningfully. "He loves you."

Frowning, Rin picked up her speed, heading for the knoll. Ginrei followed, but at a slight distance. They were an odd couple, both young mothers carrying their very young babies. One mortal and one inuyoukai, one with silver hair, the other with ebony black.

At last Rin was close enough that the knoll was no longer an obstacle. The koi pond came clear, tranquil and beautiful as always, but now there was an unusual addition to the scenery. A tawny fox, only the size of a small dog, paced alongside the stream, staring at the koi moving casually beneath the water. At first glance it appeared that the fox was hunting the fish, but when Rin paused and watched him more closely, it became clear that the fox was peering into the water without noticing the fish at all. He was staring at his reflection in the serene waters. His ears swung forward and backward, uncertain.

"Shippo?" Rin called out, tentatively.

The fox jerked its head upright and Rin found herself gazing at a pair of emerald eyes, bright and intensely intelligent. Its fur shuddered for a moment, as if it were trying to shake, and then abruptly, without any awkwardness or magic it seemed at all, the fox shape melted away, revealing a young boy standing alongside the koi pond.

"Lady Rin." He addressed her formally, though Rin was certain she heard a coolness in his tone, a careful distance.

Rin continued forward, slowly, watching the kit alertly. "How…how are you?"

The kit stayed where he was, examining her. "I'm fine. Miroku and Sango were fine when I saw them last too."

"Good." Rin answered him, stiltedly. It was an awkward meeting, a strange, unwelcome reminder that not more than a month or two ago she'd been running away, a fugitive. Some part of her still longed to escape, but it wouldn't ease her pain, and it wasn't really what she wanted…her thoughts flew to Tsukiyume. She took a deep breath. "What about…"

"Tsuki is with her brother." Shippo replied, smiling warmly, and yet Rin caught a sadness in his green eyes.

"Is…is something wrong?" she asked, quietly, aware that Ginrei was within earshot and doubtless wondering how Rin knew this kitsune that was trespassing on Naishoutgoto. "What brought you here?"

"They're negotiating peace in the Middle Lands." Shippo sighed deeply; his shoulders sagged, as if speaking of peace wearied him. "I was on my way…I was…heading back to Inuyasha and Kagome." He shrugged helplessly and grinned without any joy. "I was curious."

Awkwardly, Rin started speaking, blundering in much the same way the fox had. "Would you…when you see Inuyasha and Kagome again—would you thank them for me?" abruptly Rin felt a mass build up in the back of her throat, thick and impossible to swallow back. Her eyes burned with tears though she fought them, blinking fiercely. _If it wasn't for Inuyasha and Kagome bringing in the miko healers I wouldn't have Saya…_

Shippo nodded and continued to give his meaningless grin. "Yep. Sure. Will do."

Rin answered him with a thick, throaty voice. "Thank you."

He nodded. "No problem." He turned his back on her and seemed to shrink in height while simultaneously lengthening. A fox replaced the boy and shook its thick, fluffy light brown pelt. It raised its tail high and glanced back at Rin and Ginrei as if saluting them. Then he hurried away, looking for all the world like a real fox being chased out of the henhouse.

Although Rin couldn't have known it, Shippo had left the Middle Lands when Sesshomaru had arrived and the peace talks had begun because Shimofuri had dismissed him. The inuyoukai hadn't known where the strange kitsune's loyalties lied, and was overprotective of his sister. Alone, Shippo had wandered aimlessly for a while, listening to gossip and eventually stumbling into the Isei province where, many long years ago, he'd been born. Memory of the rumor of Sesshomaru's secret wife had brought him to Naishoutgoto, and when he'd seen and scented Ginrei and the baby Hanone in her arms, he'd known…

Now, with this freshest bit of gossip, Shippo headed home, for the coast.

After Shippo had vanished, Rin sighed and adjusted Saya, lifting the baby higher and letting the infant see the world. The baby blinked with her golden eyes widely and looked around wonderingly. Rin nuzzled her tiny cheek, breathing in the baby's milk-scent and the smooth, soft skin. _Thank you,_ she prayed silently, still fighting the tears, _thank you for her. _

"You knew the fox, Lady Rin?" Ginrei asked, gently.

Rin didn't answer for a moment and then, pulling back from Saya, she nodded almost to herself. "He's a member of Inuyasha's household." She turned to walk back toward the palace, muttering as she passed Ginrei: "You probably don't know who that is."

"I've heard the name before." Ginrei followed Rin, walking only slightly behind her and keeping pace with her. "I hear nothing here, locked away. When you arrived here, Lady Rin, I had no idea that you and Lord Sesshomaru were expecting a child—that my daughter would have a sister…"

Rin laughed bitterly, touching Saya's silky white hair, the same shade as Sesshomaru's. "I had no idea that _you_ or your daughter existed either." She felt a bizarre amusement coiling inside her, rattling dryly like some kind of rattlesnake. _Sesshomaru kept his secrets very well._

"You must know," Ginrei blurted abruptly, hurriedly, "I had no part in any of this." The tone of Ginrei's voice was beginning to sound ominously close to Rin's own bitterness. They were alike; it was true, but in completely different ways. Sesshomaru was responsible in both their miseries.

Rin peeked once over her shoulder, catching sight of Ginrei's silvered hair and bluish eyes. "I know."

Though Rin missed it, Ginrei's shoulders deflated, tension slipped out of her body, dropping away like the leaves from the trees. She watched Rin's backsides, the long curtain of black hair, with a curl in it that spoke of the wildness and freedom it had enjoyed when Rin was a child. In Ginrei's family, before the civil war had seen them all murdered, she'd known many female family members with long black hair like Rin's. It was silkier with the luster and unnatural beauty of inuyoukai immortality, and almost never curly at all, but Rin's long mane of mortal hair was close enough that the memories stirred within Ginrei.

She caught herself blinking back tears and sniffed, fighting them. Hanone slept blandly against her shoulder, probably starting to drool. Ginrei focused on her daughter to force the tears to stay back.

Rin's voice drew Ginrei out of her own private misery then. "We will have to find out what's happening in the Middle Lands."

"Why is that?" Ginrei asked after a long, cautious pause.

They had reached the door and the palace. Jaken was grunting just inside, trying to slide the inner doors open, ready to shout and scold at them as if they were children. Rin stepped out of her sandals and hesitated before opening the door and facing the little indignant toad. She watched Ginrei slipping out of her sandals and answered her question in a small, confidential voice that was only halfway meant to be heard.

"I want to understand what your husband is up to." Silently she amended, _neither of us can trust him, can we?_ She was facing Jaken's almost maternal wrath before she saw Ginrei's reaction to her words, the surprise in her bluish eyes and then the small, wary smile.

* * *

"Tell me what it is like to grow up as an inuyoukai." Rin muttered, closing her eyes tiredly. She and Ginrei were seated on the balcony, facing a sunset of fire. The day was overcast and the clouds along the western horizon were lit and illuminated by the intense orange light of the sun as it sank around the rim of the earth. It looked as if the west was on fire, as if heaven were ablaze.

Saya and Hanone were sleeping beside one another in the other room, sated after being fed. The door and shutters were closed against the chilly autumn evening draft to make sure that the babies were warm in the other room and would stay happily sleeping. If they woke Ginrei's sharp, dog-like hearing would pick out their whimpering cries over any wind.

Ginrei examined the mortal woman at her side carefully, her silvered eyes roving over Rin's graceful profile. She took a slow, halting breath. "I was always surrounded by relatives, I was never alone. There were petty squabbles and there were rumors, and there were always lessons, but I…" she swallowed convulsively and blinked ferociously at the sunlight. "…I was very happy."

Rin made a small sound in her throat, acknowledging the other woman. "Hmn." Her eyes were still closed.

"You were an orphan?" Ginrei asked, guardedly, afraid of offending the other woman.

"Yes." Rin nodded slowly, as if her head had suddenly thickened and been transformed into some heavy substance like lead or mercury. "Other humans killed my family."

"And Lord Sesshomaru found you? He saved you from these humans?"

"No." Rin opened her brown eyes and sighed deeply, continuing to stare off at the fiery sunset. "I survived on my own for a while."

Ginrei shifted in her seat, seeming to take interest and plunging forward with more confidence. "And then Lord Sesshomaru found you. What made him take you in? It is uncommon for inuyoukai to…"

Rin pursed her lips and interrupted Ginrei with a fierce shake of her head. The movement ruffled her long hair and the breeze caught it, whipping it around. "I found him. He was injured; he had just lost his arm. I tried to bring him food."

Ginrei's mouth had fallen open with astonishment. "You weren't afraid of him?"

Still Rin didn't look at her; her attention was fixed almost with painful concentration on the fiery wall of clouds that covered the sun. "No."

From Ginrei there was only the silence of speechlessness. Eventually she too turned her eyes toward the sunset and let the silence between them grow rampant.

They retired to bed, taking different rooms and their respective babies with them. Sesshomaru had been gone a week, his futon was made up and stored away, leaving the large room that Rin had taken originally—the room with the balcony attached to it—seem large and painfully empty. As she huddled down in the sheets, under the furs and nursed Saya for the last time that day, her conversation with Ginrei haunted her.

They had begun speaking to each other off and on, though they were both skittish of the other. Ginrei was an interesting inuyoukai. She was educated, but not arrogant, and some aspects of the harsh world had escaped her. Even in just her short time with her, Rin had realized that Ginrei's compliments on Saya were real and heartfelt. Yet Rin was aware that Ginrei should've felt slighted that Sesshomaru had mated a human first and cheated to _acquire_ Ginrei like a piece of property. Aside from that fact, there was also the fact that Saya was _hanyou_, and that was heavily frowned upon in both mortal and immortal worlds. Ginrei, however, seemed to have missed that prejudice. It didn't matter to her that Sesshomaru had "sullied" his bloodline by conceiving Saya with Rin. Ginrei saw only the individuals involved, she saw only the marked resemblance between Sesshomaru and Saya, she saw only Hanone's older half sister.

What had it been like, Rin wondered, to grow up amidst so many inuyoukai? To be surrounded by them, educated by them, and to be loved by them? Sesshomaru and Jaken had educated Rin because death had taken away her human family and all of her human ties. They had loved and protected her, but it was a distant relationship throughout her childhood, one that had involved a lot of loneliness.

She stared down at Saya's white-topped little head as the baby suckled and considered the tiny girl's future. Would she be nurtured alongside Hanone? Would Ginrei become a second mother? Would Sesshomaru be there actively teaching his daughters, or just Saya, or neither? Would Rin _allow_ any of it to happen?

She settled down with her child and let sleep take her…

A dream enveloped her. Through a small snow flurry, she watched Sesshomaru walking. He was so fair, so white, that if he were to stop moving he would fade into the falling snow. His dark blue boots stood out against the snow however, and Rin watched them as they left deep, strong indentations in the snow.

Behind him were two small girls, the shorter girl led the way. Sesshomaru was leading them away, deeper into the snowstorm. Disturbed, Rin tried to call out to them, but her mouth was slow, as if carved out of stone and not real at all. Her tongue was thick, her mouth felt stuffed with cotton.

The girls stopped and turned to stare back at her from a distance. It should've been impossible for Rin to see, but somehow she made out their features. The shorter girl with a bluish crescent moon on her forehead and bright, amber eyes. And the other, taller girl with silvered eyes and twin white streaks on her cheeks…

The shutters on the windows rattled and the doorway to the balcony shook, lashed by the wind outside. Rin found herself wide awake suddenly, gasping and searching the room. At the same moment she felt Saya with one hand, feeling the baby's warmth and hearing her steady, itty bitty breaths puffing in and out. The room was dark and it'd grown colder, Rin's feet were stinging with the chill.

Though there appeared to be nothing amiss, Rin trusted her instincts. She sat up and asked the darkness in her sleep-rasping voice, "Who's there?"

A shadow fell on the door to the balcony, sending Rin's heart pounding with panic for one microsecond before she relaxed again, releasing the breath she hadn't known she was holding. She would recognize the profile of that shadow, its bearing, its posture, and its long mane of white hair, until the day she died.

The door slid open when there was a lull in the wind and Sesshomaru passed through wordlessly, closing it again as soon as he was through. He faced Rin stiffly and radiating the cold of the night outside.

"Rin" he addressed her blandly as he lowered into a sitting position and lifted his only hand to touch on the metal of his shoulder guard. The motion was a silent plea to her, an entreaty for help. With only one hand he relied on servants to undress him and release his armor.

Obediently Rin rose out of the warmth of her covers and tiptoed across the freezing floor to kneel at his side. Clumsy, sleepy fingers fumbled with the ties on his armor. She flinched when her warm flesh touched the bitter metal and shivered reflexively. Sesshomaru stared straight ahead as she worked, like a statue. Even when they were at their warmest, most loving moments, these moments when his handicap was obvious always drew the same coldness. He was as unresponsive and uncomfortable as his icy armor.

Clearing her throat, Rin started speaking nonetheless, challenging him. "You made peace with Lord Shimofuri and his uncle?"

His breath changed minutely, picking up almost indiscernibly. "Yes, but it is unsteady." Rin caught his glare, burning at her through the darkness, "If not for my promise, I would have killed him."

Rin's fingers on the armor halted as she reached back into her memory and found that promise. "Lord Shimofuri, you mean?"

She could still feel his gaze on her, heavily as he answered and she continued picking at the ties. He said, "Yes." It was almost a grumble. She didn't expect him to go on but he did, adding, "He demanded a hostage."

The ties securing the metal shoulder guard slipped free. Biting her lips, Rin lifted it clear of Sesshomaru and set it aside. "You could've given him Jaken."

Sesshomaru lifted his nose higher into the air, looking down at her now. "Out of the question. That fool would not have taken Jaken."

Rin sat back and gazed into Sesshomaru's face directly. "Who did he want?"

Her mate's eyes narrowed with what might've been suspicion, as if Rin had set up whatever events had gone on in the Middle Lands while they were negotiating peace. "He has an interest in you."

"Lord Sesshomaru took Tsukiyume from Lord Shimofuri for so long, he desires the same thing. It is his right." Rin reached for the rest o his armor, searching with her now awake but cold fingertips for the other strings that secured his body armor.

Sesshomaru caught one of her wrists with his hand, squeezing it tightly. In spite of the fact that he had just come in from the cold outside, Sesshomaru's touch was hot on Rin's skin. Rin stared at his hand over her wrist as he spoke, demanding thickly, "Would you have gone as Shimofuri's hostage?"

Rin pursed her lips tightly, frowning through the darkness. She pulled her hand out of Sesshomaru's. "Yes, why not?"

Sesshomaru hissed out, "Ridiculous."

"Why am I ridiculous?" Rin muttered darkly, directing her eyes down toward where she'd set his metal shoulder guard. The spikes gleamed sharply and Rin felt a perverse desire to lay her palm over them, to feel them prick her skin.

Though she wouldn't meet his gaze, Sesshomaru was staring at her, his golden eyes ablaze from within, like the sun that had set the clouds on fire at dusk. "You would leave, you would betray me." After the faintest of pauses, he added one last word in a shallow growl. "Again."

Rin countered him immediately. "You'll go to Ginrei again. Hanone isn't enough." She added another nail to the coffin viciously, her words turning into bitter snarls at last. "Killing her family wasn't enough."

To his credit, Sesshomaru flinched at her words. "Silence."

Rin scooted away from him slightly and stared him down, eye to eye. "Maybe you should've handed me over to Lord Shimofuri." She muttered, her hands curling into fists at her sides. "What good am I, a lowly human, to the great Lord Sesshomaru? He only thinks of power and control, but I will not be controlled…"

Muscles in Sesshomaru's face quivered, jerking reflexively as he reined in his emotions carefully, stifling them and controlling his reaction. It was true what Rin had said, Sesshomaru was indeed a creature of control and power, even over himself. "I will not allow you to leave." His eyes narrowed, pinning her gaze with his own. "Saya is _mine."_

For a moment Rin felt nothing but the pulsing throb of her own heart, pumping away inside her ears, in the arteries on her neck and in her arms. She fought to control her breathing, there seemed to be a mass inside her chest, constricting it, blocking out parts of her lungs, keeping her from taking a full breath. Her body craved oxygen and she felt a wave of dizziness break over her. Sesshomaru would control her using Saya. If she ever entertained thoughts of leaving, Sesshomaru would take Saya from her, and Rin could never leave her baby behind.

Hot tears swarmed into Rin's eyes and spilled out uncontrollably. "Why?" she demanded in a low voice, chokingly. "Why would you do that? Why keep me here if you don't…if I'm not…" she swallowed and started to sob. "…Saya is nothing to you, she's _hanyou…"_

Sesshomaru was silent and, through her thick, hot tears, Rin couldn't see his expression. She blinked, trying to clear her eyesight, but more tears flooded her eyes, blurring the image all over again. The sobbing picked up; breathing became difficult around the surge of her emotion. She clapped a hand over her mouth and bent forward, trying to contain herself, to regain control.

"Stop crying." Sesshomaru ordered her, distantly.

Rin rocked back and forth, trying to stop—though not for him but for herself. The tears spilled over her cheeks and splattered onto the floorboards and onto Rin's lap. A few even landed on Sesshomaru's knees. "Why?" she demanded again, thumping a fist on the floor weakly. "Why would you keep me here?"

"You are my mate." Sesshomaru snarled back at her abruptly, as if those four words explained everything.

"I'm a worthless human." Rin held her breath, struggling to regain control. She scooted forward and reached for Sesshomaru's body armor again, as if to untie it as though nothing were wrong at all.

Sesshomaru caught her hands firmly in his own and Rin lowered her face to his robes, letting her tears soak into the place where his metal shoulder guard had perched before. "You are not worthless." He muttered above her.

"I can't…" she choked quietly into his robes, "…give you pure heirs…"

Though she would never see it, Sesshomaru closed his eyes, his face loosened, forming an expression that bordered on sadness or melancholy. "It does not matter."

Stiltedly, she sobbed out, "It mattered enough…you killed your own…lied to me…"

"Silence." Sesshomaru ground out, his voice thick. His lips moved up and down spastically, caught between anger and sadness. He released her hands and instead touched her shoulder, pulling her closer to him as if she were a child crying after a nightmare and seeking comfort. "Hush."

"You never…" she hiccupped and gasped, trying to take a deep enough breath to speak coherently, "You never told me…"

"I am sorry." He announced, coldly. "There is nothing that can be changed now." He stared at the futon that he'd called her from, at the mussed sheets and furs, at the lump where he could hear their daughter breathing peacefully in her innocent sleep. He touched Rin's hair, moving his clawed fingers gently through it. A memory stirred somewhere inside him, Ginrei's words spoken months ago when Rin had first run away. He repeated part of it to Rin, reverently. _"It can only be accepted."_

A time passed as Rin's sobbing calmed and Sesshomaru's hand continued to pass through Rin's long, black hair, solemnly. At last Rin withdrew from him and viciously attacked his body armor, untying it as fast as her long, narrow fingers could manage. The pieces fell away and Rin tossed them aside carelessly. Her face was creased deeply with furrows and lines of unhappiness. She didn't look into Sesshomaru's face, though he watched her unrestrainedly. Their positions had reversed. As a child and often as his mate, Rin spent her time studying him intently, always taking in his expressions, searching out his emotions and through those tiny traces, his thoughts. Now Sesshomaru was trying to do the same, striving to understand what was going on inside his mortal mate's head.

The last bit of armor came free and Rin rose to her feet and walked back to the futon unceremoniously. She cuddled close to Saya but didn't touch her. Her hands were too cold from being outside the warmth and security of the blankets and protective furs. She stared out at Sesshomaru from beneath the blankets, her expression fierce and stern.

After a moment of silence, Rin raised a quavering voice that contradicted the tough set to her face. "May Rin ask Sesshomaru-sama a question?"

"You may."

"Does Sesshomaru-sama love this worthless human? Is that why he traps her? Does he love his hanyou child?" her voice was quiet but thick with emotion. Her brown eyes gleamed with fresh unshed tears.

Sesshomaru grimaced for a microsecond and then cleared his face, searching his mind for some sort of answer…when it came he felt his body tense with irritation. "I did not know that Rin was _trapped."_

Rin's eyes closed tightly, the tears spilled out, but when she spoke her voice was stronger than it had been. "Answer me."

He stared at her and asked a question of his own, allowing his voice to reveal real anger. "You wish to leave me—you would run to Shimofuri?"

"Answer me!" Rin cried.

"I will never allow you to leave with Saya." Sesshomaru snarled at her, ignoring her demands as if she hadn't spoken at all.

"You don't love me." Rin covered her face with one hand, pressing her fingers to her eyes, smearing the tears. She rolled away from him to hide her face. "Shimofuri or Sesshomaru—I am a hostage to both."

That stopped him. Sesshomaru pulled back as if she'd slapped him, his mouth worked, revealing his fangs, bright and white against the rest of the dark room. His face blanked again quickly as he heard Rin's sobbing, quiet and restrained. She had smashed herself into the futon mattress to obscure the sound, but the stink of her salty tears and her misery reached Sesshomaru nonetheless.

"You are not my hostage." He told her, coldly. When he realized that she either hadn't heard him or was ignoring him, Sesshomaru called her name sternly, as if addressing a child. "Rin. You are not my hostage. You are my mate."

Still there was no response. Helpless, Sesshomaru stared at her shuddering, sobbing back through the furs, thinking furiously. Did he love her? It was a foolish question, a waste of his time. What did Sesshomaru care about love? How did he define it? Rin had run away to his political enemy, used herself against him, and while carrying his child no less. And yet the thought of allowing her to leave as a hostage sickened and angered him beyond measure. Declarations of love were pointless, trivial. What mattered were his actions. Sesshomaru would never keep Rin at his side if he didn't care for her—but would he ever _tell_ her that aloud? Even Jaken he allowed to stay because the toad was oftentimes useful and could be, however reluctantly, tolerated.

He had never professed to miss his father, even to mourn his death. Inutaisho, in turn, had never uttered a word about love. His own _father…_why was Rin any different?

But Shimofuri…he pictured the younger inuyoukai's face, handsome and with blue-black hair. He had large, expressive eyes and often couldn't control the emotions that were displayed over his face—a weakness in Sesshomaru's mind. But if Rin demanded the same declaration from Shimofuri, the youth would probably be able to utter the words. He was gentler than Sesshomaru, naive. He'd been raised by a female ruler that smothered him with praise and affection. Rin would like Shimofuri's reaction to her question a lot more…

Sesshomaru got to his feet and stood, uncertainly, watching Rin crying for a time. Gradually he stepped forward until he was at her bedside. He knelt there and felt beneath the furs delicately with his hand. He touched Saya and the baby made a small gurgling noise. She smelled richly, sweet and musky, a healthy baby full of human milk.

Rin had realized, even through her grief, that Sesshomaru had knelt at her bedside. She'd quieted her crying and laid motionless, waiting for Sesshomaru's next move.

Stiffly, Sesshomaru tried to speak, but the words were almost robotic, dead and mechanical. "I care for you…"

"Is it impossible…" Rin murmured, closing her eyes, "For Sesshomaru to speak even the word love?"

"It is a human idea." He answered evasively. When he spotted the shining droplets of her tears and smelled the salt again, he hurriedly added, "I am sorry." Apologies had always felt strange on his lips and tongue, offensive things that gummed his mouth up. He blustered on, forcefully. "What must I do, Rin?"

She sniffled almost childishly and pawed at her nose as if she was angry with herself for catching a cold when it was really the tears and her grief that caused the runny nose. She recalled the dream she'd had: the snowstorm, Sesshomaru's dark blue boots moving through the snow drifts, the two white-haired girls following after him, leaping between boot prints…

She heaved a long, painful sigh. "I don't know."

Sesshomaru's hand fell onto her shoulder and squeezed it. "You would run away again?"

Rin made a small sound, almost a hiccup. She shook her head dimly. "No." There was nothing for her away from Sesshomaru. Even if she'd had Saya with her to nurture, worry over, and protect, just looking at the child every day would be a silent torture. Saya bore an unquestionable resemblance to her father. It would be impossible for Rin to see Saya without thinking of Sesshomaru. From the moment Rin the orphan had found the injured, despondent Sesshomaru in the woods, she had been bound to him unquestionably.

It was impossible to sever herself from him, not now, not when she'd run away, and not in the future…

Sesshomaru breathed audibly, Rin felt his grasp on her loosen slightly. She thought, though she couldn't be sure, that he was relieved by her simple answer. He began speaking, haltingly. "Your presence…is valued."

He didn't want her to leave, hadn't ever wanted her to leave.

"I'm tired." She murmured, the sound smashed on the pillow and devoured by the blankets.

"Sleep, Rin." His hand withdrew and Rin felt him move away, heard his robes rustle like the dry leaves that were turning their fall colors outside. She heard the rattle and grind of the doors on the balcony as they slid open, felt the draft of the cold hit the back of her head as Sesshomaru passed outside.

Saya whimpered once, stirring from her baby dreams momentarily, and then she was silent and motionless again, deep in her innocent sleep.

Moments later Rin fell into a dreamless void, fast asleep, unaware that Sesshomaru had not left her but stayed just outside on the balcony, staring into the distance, waiting for the sunrise.

* * *

A/N: Ugh, this is hard. I wanted so badly to update but I would sit down and look at the writing and get frustrated and go around and around in circles. The only way out that I see is that Rin has to come to terms with it all, but that just seems too bland! Ack! And when I get frustrated I get writer's block...writer's block!! NOOO!! ( 


	33. Gone With Leaves

A/N: I've had a moderately life changing week…something happened, something good, but then it got complicated. AHH! And that exacerbated my writer's block horribly. I'd already decided what I wanted to do with this story, how I want to finish it, but with everything that's been going on at midterm and over the weekend…I basically haven't written a stitch at all. Soon I'll be out of practice! AHH! BTW! I have been honored by a fanart image by **Teela-akimako-cz** which can be found here: http:// teela-akimako-cz. Runaway-illustration-69002361 just remove the spaces I've shoved in there and hopefully that will work. It is an EXCELLENT illustration and I believe it captures Ginrei perfectly. I am honored by it and very impressed! Thank you Teela!

Disclaimer: I own Saya, Ginrei, and Hanone. Everyone else is not mine. Ah, oh I forgot, Shimofuri is mine though.

Last chapter: Rin and Ginrei started, hesitantly to bond. Shippo appeared briefly and Rin told him to thank IY and Kagome, though I'm sure you all know what IY would say to that. Something like she could stick it where the sun don't shine. Rin and Sesshomaru fought. Sess is unable to wrestle out the words, "I love you."

* * *

**Gone With Leaves**

Life was imperfect and, even in moments of peace and happiness, even when life brought virtually nothing but beauty and kindness, one could still feel as if disaster lurked in the corners, peeking from the shadows. Even while happy, one could still find things to be dissatisfied about, to mull over them, exploring them and amplifying them, just as one's tongue can probe too often on a tender tooth and create a real wound where before there was none. Shimofuri felt this way acutely after Sesshomaru disappeared back into the Western Lands—or perhaps the Isei again—leaving peace treaties in his wake.

The discussions between Sasugainu, Sesshomaru, and Shimofuri had lasted two days, and every moment had been torture for Shimofuri. He faced Sesshomaru, who, slowly but surely, he'd grown to hate with a fierceness he normally reserved for battle and for the inferior, unthinking youkai that terrorized human villages. And at Sesshomaru's side, awkwardly, was his uncle Sasugainu, the coward.

The provinces of the Middle Lands opened up their borders again, trading restarted. Humans celebrated as Sesshomaru's army disbursed and faded away. But between the three inuyoukai leaders there was nothing but tension and the lingering bitterness of betrayal.

Though Shimofuri had, in a way, _stolen_ Rin from Sesshomaru, he didn't view it as any kind of victory over the lord of the Western Lands. Sesshomaru had turned Sasugainu against Shimofuri with fear, and the coward's disgraceful betrayal weighed on Shimofuri heavily.

One of the provinces, the eastern Itou, was leaderless. Sesshomaru had killed Arasoizuki and destroyed his castle. A few members of his family had survived, his wife and one of his sons. It was sloppy of Sesshomaru to have left them alive. They were a loose end. Arasoizuki's wife's family in the north had taken in the survivors, and they were calling for punishment and for Arasoizuki's land to be turned over to their family. Shimofuri hadn't answered them yet, in fact he'd ignored their messengers and letters, he was too focused on the threat of war and on Sasugainu's betrayal.

The negotiations brought all of this forward, however. Shimofuri read off the charges against Sesshomaru. The family demanded that blood be paid with blood, but everyone knew that such a payment would never be exacted. There wasn't anyone powerful enough to enforce the edict against Sesshomaru. He would walk away with Arasoizuki's blood on his hands and with no true debt to pay.

Shimofuri tried very hard to change that. He was young and his audacity had frightened Sasugainu, and it threatened Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru tried to punish him using Tsukiyume, as he always did—and Shimofuri demanded a hostage in return. Rin and her child were nonessentials to Sesshomaru: a mortal woman could never rule anything and a hanyou _daughter_ was just about as useless. Logically Sesshomaru would still have the upper hand, holding Tsukiyume against the unwed and heirless Shimofuri while he stayed contentedly with a wife and a full-blooded child, a potential heir.

Sesshomaru balked at the idea of releasing Rin and his hanyou daughter to Shimofuri. The idea of hostages was dropped immediately. The plan to appease Arasoizuki's family in the far north changed dramatically when Sasugainu suggested that Shimofuri could negotiate a marriage with Arasoizuki's widow and then raise the fatherless son to take over the Itou when he was old enough. Shimofuri fought the idea at first, but in the end it was decided that the idea would at least be proposed to Arasoizuki's family and decided with certainty at a later date.

Sesshomaru escaped the negotiations without losing anything, promising merely to cease hostilities and diffuse his army. Shimofuri and Sasugainu appeared, on the surface, to have mended their separation, but beneath it all, as they'd signed the treaties in ink, Shimofuri broiled with insult.

Sesshomaru was untouchable, but Shimofuri vowed that he would find a way to punish him, no matter how long it took…

* * *

Early in the morning, Sesshomaru called Rin out of her deep, dreamless sleep in a rough, harsh voice. "Rin."

She opened her eyes slowly, blinking up at him like a fawn. Saya was nestled up against her side, warm like a space heater partly below the blankets and furs. Looking out from the covers, Rin saw her mate standing above her, looming like a mountain clad from summit to base in snow.

"We are leaving today." Sesshomaru told her, coldly.

Confused and dazed with the remnants of sleep, Rin started to sit up, clutching the covers around her as the cold air of the room tried to reach hungrily for her skin. "Where…"

"You will spend the winter at Jouka."

Sleep was fast receding from Rin's mind, leaving her sharp and hot with a burst of anger. "Where will Lord Sesshomaru spend the winter?"

He threw her a withering glare through his narrowed golden eyes. "There is much to be done. I will be traveling…"

"You'll leave me at Jouka alone." Rin finished for him, snarling. She focused on her hands, pale and skeletal. The months before, during, and after her pregnancy had been hard on her in every way imaginable. Fatigue lingered in her bones, deep in the marrow, making her limbs feel like lead. She closed her eyes, letting out a wavering breath.

"There is no other choice." Sesshomaru replied, stiffly. When Rin didn't move for a time and the silence began to stretch yawningly, he expanded on his words. "You leave me no other choice."

"I didn't do anything." Rin muttered bitterly, "_Lord Sesshomaru_ made those choices for himself. No one controls Lord Sesshomaru, no one has ever touched his heart or understood it."

Though Rin didn't see it, Sesshomaru flinched, his face scrunching up briefly and twisting into a frown before it partially relaxed again, back under his control. The inuyoukai lord, for all of his massive power and stature, was rendered speechless. Ideas raced through his head, but none of them were plausible. An irrational side of him wanted to shout at her, to beg her to forgive him—but he could never do that and likely never would. Speaking the three little words that humans put so much merit into—_I love you—_might pull a few of Rin's heartstrings. She would see things from his side. He had made mistakes, he had erred, but he couldn't change it. If changing it meant killing Ginrei and Hanone…he doubted Rin would ever want that, even deep in her innermost, secret thoughts.

They had tiny, beautiful Saya. That was the most concrete thing they shared now. And Sesshomaru was already using their daughter to control Rin, to _force_ her to stay where he wanted her. Her words flitted back to him, _trapped._ She was trapped with him, held against her will. When she was a child, Sesshomaru had always allowed her the choice, sometimes even hoped that she would leave him and rejoin humanity. Yet, even so long ago, he'd known that she would have trouble existing there. She had trouble with human men; they unnerved her because she had been exposed to their carnage when bandits murdered her family. How could she survive as some housewife when she feared her husband? She had never truly feared him, though perhaps she should've…

He gazed at her slouched, exhausted form, at the cascade of long black hair. He longed to touch it, to feel her smooth skin against his own. To see her warm, earthy brown eyes meet his own hazy with love.

Cautiously, he reached out toward her with his clawed, pale-skinned hands. Rin sensed the movement and her eyes snapped open, but they didn't roll toward him to watch. Sesshomaru touched the strands of her hair, messy from sleep, moving them over his fingertips to feel the roughness. Her hair was thicker than his own, and yet the roughness had always appealed to him, strong like fiber, strong as only Rin could be.

Rin lifted one hand and pushed his touch away. She breathed shakily and spoke with trembling lips. "I…I want to stay here."

Sesshomaru froze, his hand and hers still touching, hovering in mid air. "What?"

"I want to stay here with Ginrei." Rin announced, more firmly now. "You are going away—are you not?"

Anger rippled through Sesshomaru and he spoke swiftly to answer her, too fast for him to control the tone of his voice. "You leave me no other choice…" could time wrench Rin's heart into forgiving him? It was time that had made her desperate enough to at last profess her love, to beg him not to marry her to some samurai lord. If he was away, in the cold of the wilderness for a year or a season, would it be enough to bring her back to him? "What else would you have me do?"

"Lord Sesshomaru must do as Lord Sesshomaru has always done. It would be wrong to expect him to act in any other way." Rin pulled her hand back and clasped it with the other in her lap. She stared ahead at the wall, her jaw squared firmly.

"Why do you wish to stay here?" he demanded, perplexed.

"Ginrei is here." Rin answered, anger tainting her voice. "It would be best to keep both Lord Sesshomaru's wife and his mate together."

"You will run to Shimofuri when I am gone." Sesshomaru spat at her, forcefully. His lips quivered, his golden eyes narrowed as he searched her face with growing rage. The Isei was close to the Middle Lands, much closer than Jouka was. It made sense that Rin would try to ruin him again and position herself closer to the only major threat he saw to himself or his power.

"I have already told Lord Sesshomaru that I would not leave." She met his angry gaze at last, matching his rage with her own.

"You will be watched." Sesshomaru bit out at her, growling.

"Like a prisoner." Rin retorted under her breath.

Sesshomaru was silent then, but the muscles in his face continued to quiver with his outrage. His nostrils flared. Rin looked away from him, reaching back into the covers to check on Saya. Her face softened as she uncovered the sleeping baby, her lips relaxed, on the verge of a small, weak smile.

A dark, bitter thought spread over Sesshomaru's mind as he watched Rin's expression change. He could take Saya with him, leaving Rin alone and miserable. Would Rin still run away to Shimofuri if Sesshomaru held their daughter against her?

But one cold hard fact prevented him from doing this. It was true, Sesshomaru could raise their daughter, but he could not nurse her. It was one thing they shared—humans and inuyoukai—the need to nurse their young. A snake youkai was free, like all reptiles, to turn its children loose on the world without raising them at all because there was no need for milk. Inuyoukai represented the dog, a mammal. Saya and Hanone both were bound to their mothers because of their need for milk.

"Swear to me, Rin," Sesshomaru began, thickly, "That you will not leave with Shimofuri. Swear that you are _mine…"_

Rin had scooped up Saya and cradled the baby in her arms. She stroked the baby's feathery white hair and ran her fingers lovingly over the crescent moon in the center of the baby's forehead. The baby opened her small, round eyes sleepily and gurgled. Her eyes were bright just beyond her eyelids, golden like the sunrise.

Something heavy filled Sesshomaru's chest at the sight, reaching up into his throat with fingers that burned like fire and froze like ice at once. He swallowed, fighting the old, halfway forgotten desire to cry. The emotions flowing within were withheld and restrained, barely showing on his face and in his posture. "Swear to me, Rin. Swear you will stay here, with Ginrei." _I could not stand to lose you…_

But as she lifted her face to him and he saw the stoniness of it, Sesshomaru felt the heaviness inside him swell all over again. _I have already lost her…_

The burning rose from his throat and touched the back of his eyes. Sesshomaru dropped his head immediately, alarmed and desperate to hide his reaction. The tears were few, but it was likely that Rin would be able to see them, and he could never expose such weakness—not even to _her_ now. She was gone, almost as good as already at Shimofuri's side, almost as good as dead. But their daughter, who looked so much like him, she was still _his._ There was still hope for her.

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked, her voice oddly quiet, distant. She had failed to add his title. The small irritation that that tiny mistake offered allowed Sesshomaru stifle the inner war raging inside him and look back up at her with as much coldness as he could muster.

"You will swear not to leave this palace. You must stay here with Saya—she is _mine."_

Rin blinked at him, her eyes clouded with tears. "How many times do I have to tell you, I won't leave you!"

"I will leave Jaken with you…" he paused, searching for another name, a trusted messenger, one of Daken's relatives… "Oushi will stay with you as well."

He began to rise to his feet and turn his back on her, but Rin called out to him, her voice high and plaintive. "You will write? You will come back…?"

A small niggling hope made Sesshomaru pause, analyzing her voice, contemplating the bleakness of the present and weighing it with what could be an open, possibly optimistic future. "I will return."

He moved toward the balcony door and slid it open, letting the cold air flow in. Behind him, Rin abruptly made a sound like a cough that was actually a sob. Sesshomaru paused, turning his head slightly to watch as she rushed toward him, still holding their daughter in her arms. She pressed her body as closely to his as she could while holding Saya.

"Please," she sobbed, shaking her head, "don't be gone…very long…" she lifted her head just enough to look up at him, the fresh tears swimming in her tired eyes. "I…love you." Yet, as she spoke the words, her face was twisted with undeniable anger; it wasn't hard to decode it. She loved him, but it was a helpless love that she didn't want to feel, it was exactly what _trapped_ her…she loved him, but she couldn't forgive him.

And he couldn't trust her. She had gone to his enemy, pregnant with his child. Now he was leaving her, feeling that there was nothing else that he could do but give the situation time and distance, and he was going mad inwardly wondering…would she still be _his_ when he returned?

He placed his hand on her shoulders and then on her hair, parting the strands to touch her neck. Her skin was warm and dry and smooth. He felt over the curve of her neck, the gracefulness of it as her skin quivered beneath his touch. Was he really going to leave her…?

Rin's sobbing had quieted, though Sesshomaru hadn't noticed. Abruptly, she pulled back, clutching Saya close to her. She stared at the floor, at his feet, and remained silent except for the occasional sniffle and shake of her shoulders as she restrained any further outbursts. She was waiting for him to leave. Sesshomaru remembered her words from moments ago: _"…don't be gone…very long."_ She accepted his leaving; perhaps it was even what she wanted…

"Go." She whispered, hoarsely, as if deliberately confirming his thoughts.

Stiffly, Sesshomaru turned from her and stepped out of the room onto the balcony, refusing to turn back or shut the door behind him. His acute hearing heard Rin collapse behind him, sobbing all over again. The same heaviness rose inside him again, but Sesshomaru pushed it away, smothering it.

He leapt easily from the balcony and onto the frosted, cold earth of the lake's shore some twenty feet away. The gardens were wreathed in mist. It hovered like smoke over the koi pond and over the lake, shrouding Naishougoto, the secret palace, in fog and mystery. Sesshomaru paused, listening to the sounds of nature, the deathly stillness of the morning, and felt the first breath of winter whispering through his white hair.

There was one last thing he had to do before he left Naishougoto, before he retreated from the Isei, the land that had cost him Rin…

He crossed the bridge back to the palace on silent feet. The guards at the door were alert and stony as he passed by them, more like statues than men or inuyoukai. Sesshomaru slipped into the palace silently and moved up the stairs again.

Rin was still crying—he could hear her clearly from the room with its balcony at the other end of the hall. The door was closed. He prayed her human ears would miss the sound of his voice one last time. He moved to the small room where Ginrei slept now after the bloodshed in her first bedroom where Hanone had been born.

He slid the door open and stepped through into the dark warmth of the room. Like Rin, Ginrei kept her tiny daughter close to her at all times, tucked against her for warmth against the coming winter. Sesshomaru crossed the distance and knelt at her bedside. Tentatively he reached out and touched Ginrei's forehead, waking her gently.

His wife blinked her silvered eyes, coming awake swiftly and with shock. Sesshomaru hadn't visited her at all during the night. As far as Ginrei was concerned, Sesshomaru had only just returned.

"My lord…" Ginrei started to sit up but Sesshomaru made a curt motion, signaling her to stop. She hesitated, reading the faint signs of distress in him at last. "What's wrong?" her voice was low and sleepy.

"I am leaving for a time." He murmured, quietly, letting his gaze wander away from her and toward the opposite wall. "Rin is staying with you."

Ginrei nodded, though her confusion remained apparent. "I will be honored by Lady Rin's presence."

Sesshomaru paused, searching over his wife's face for a long moment as he thought hurriedly. Finally he asked, "Let me see Hanone."

There was a small note of caution in Ginrei's expression as she stared back at him. "Why, my lord?" there was a gleam of something that might've been suspicion in her eyes.

"Let me see Hanone." Sesshomaru insisted again, his voice a little firmer than before.

Ginrei changed her position and pulled back the covers and furs slightly as she reached into them, searching for her baby. She offered Hanone to him slowly, with noticeable reluctance. Her watchful gaze didn't move from Sesshomaru or her daughter.

Awkwardly, Sesshomaru cradled Hanone in his single hand and arm, examining Hanone's sleepy, mildly irritable expression. The baby was annoyed at having been woken so unceremoniously. Her clothes were simple at the moment, a blue robe though she hardly needed it when she was tucked so closely against her mother's skin. Sesshomaru turned her one way and then the other, scrutinizing her as if she were a work of art that he might find imperfect and, unsatisfied, break it down for spare parts to start over.

The baby was well formed. The longer she was held away from her mother, the more Hanone began to squirm and whimper disapprovingly. Her clawed hands were chubby but strong. She snatched a strand of Sesshomaru's hair and tugged viciously. Sesshomaru allowed it, failing to react at all to it in fact. Lowering Hanone onto his knee, Sesshomaru freed his hand to touch her white hair—as silky as his own. The baby peered up at him, still holding some of his hair in her closed fist; her silver eyes were like Ginrei's, bright and shining with intelligence. She could already focus on him; her eyes followed every one of his motions alertly.

When Sesshomaru began to pull gently on Hanone's tiny sleeping robe, Ginrei's patience at last gave out. "Lord Sesshomaru—" she started, stammering a little too loudly for his liking.

"Please, silence." Sesshomaru told her, growling slightly.

"But what are you doing to…"

Sesshomaru had exposed the baby's chest. He lowered his face to her bare skin and breathed, taking in her scent, fighting to analyze it. She smelled healthy and richly of Ginrei's milk. He tried to feel and sense deeper, to detect the child's aura and discover if it held any secrets to the baby's future. Was she powerful? Was she worthy? She was female and therefore inherently weak but…

"Please!" Ginrei reached out and touched one hand to Hanone, the other onto Sesshomaru's knee. "What are you…"

Sesshomaru sat up and pulled the child's tiny robe closed. "Take her."

Ginrei snatched her baby away from him and tucked the child close. The baby was unharmed of course and at once began to pull on her mother's hair now.

Sesshomaru watched the tiny baby's motions, avidly. "I have decided she is worthy. Hanone will be my heir."

Ginrei whipped her eyes up to stare at him, flabbergasted. "No!" her eyes were wide; her mouth worked the air uselessly for a moment as Sesshomaru watched her, surprised by her odd reaction. "Lord Sesshomaru…" she stammered, blinking rapidly. "Lord Sesshomaru must have a son!"

He searched her anew, almost suspiciously, but didn't speak. He had planned to accept Hanone as his heir, and from there he would consider annulling their marriage and setting Ginrei free—though he hated the idea of doing it and hoped more so that the act would inspire Rin to forgive him and with time she might allow him to try for a proper _male_ heir perhaps—but Ginrei's reaction was unexpected.

"Lord Sesshomaru must have a son." Ginrei repeated, fervently. "Please…"

She would beg him to force her through another pregnancy and, if that was another girl, yet another pregnancy…? Why? It was what Sesshomaru wanted, to continue trying until a proper, strong son was born from his union with Ginrei, but he had no idea why it would abruptly be in Ginrei's interests.

"You believe Hanone would not be fit as my successor?" Sesshomaru asked, blandly.

Ginrei paused, glancing between her husband and the child yawning innocently in her arms. "No, I don't know my lord…" she avoided his searching gaze and focused on her daughter instead. "We agreed that Hanone would be _my_ daughter…"

Sesshomaru sat back on his heels slightly, understanding her reaction at last. Hanone was as much _his_ heir as she was _Ginrei's_ heir. It was true, they had decided that he would not claim Hanone, she would be raised at Ginrei's discretion.

"Very well then." Sesshomaru nodded, coldly. "She is yours, as you wish."

Ginrei tried to bow, but Hanone in her arms made it difficult. "Thank you, my lord. Thank you."

Sesshomaru rose to his feet and began to leave the room, still moving on his silent feet. "You will look after Rin for me?" he asked her quietly when he'd reached the door.

Ginrei nodded. "Yes, my lord. Until you return."

Sesshomaru slipped from her room, closing the door behind him. The hallway was silent now, Rin's sobbing no longer echoed faintly from the walls. Cautiously, Sesshomaru moved down the stairs and passed out of the palace, barely making a sound. No one tried to halt him. Rin didn't burst from her room at the last moment and fall to her knees at his feet, sobbing and begging him to stay. The guards stared after him as he passed into the mists wreathing the gardens and the forest in the distance, like a ghost—be it devil or angel—and vanished, fading into the whiteness as dawn slowly but surely lit the world with its brightness.

* * *

In the late morning, Ginrei rose and dressed as she normally did. Her robes were light blue, detailing a scene of the ocean with a white-blue sky, and the deep gray waters of the sea, with white-capped waves pushed by some invisible wind. She carried Hanone with her and ate a rich breakfast of stewed, unseasoned meat. Her appetite was hearty since she'd given birth to Hanone. She craved meats for protein and fat. Hanone would grow swiftly while nursing from her mother, probably outgrowing Saya even though Saya was several weeks older.

"I dreamed that I heard Lord Sesshomaru last night!" Jaken exclaimed when he hobbled into the tearoom and plopped down on one of the cushioned seats. His round, huge reptilian eyes peeked over the table at Ginrei and Hanone and at the tea and meat in the center of the table—out of his feeble reach. "Oh drat!"

Ginrei watched Jaken grunt and try to haul himself onto the table to reach the food. She waited until the toad was most of the way up before she reached into the middle of the table and scooted the food closer to him. He stopped and fell clumsily back to his cushion. "Thank you, my lady!"

"You did hear Lord Sesshomaru last night, Jaken." Ginrei told him at last.

He stopped mid-reach and gaped at her. "What? I did?"

"Lord Sesshomaru was here early this morning." Ginrei explained, slowly. "He left. It sounded as if it would be for some time."

Jaken made an indignant sound, a huffing noise. His feelings had been hurt. "And he didn't stop by even to say hello? Hmpf!"

"He told me to take care of Lady Rin." Ginrei murmured, dropping her voice and frowning in confusion.

"He didn't take her with him?" Jaken asked, gasping. "I thought for sure…that means she's still here! Where is that girl…?"

"I'll go and see her." Ginrei shifted awkwardly and set Hanone on the cushion she had been sitting on and got to her feet. Jaken watched her go, making small sounds that might've been whimpers.

Ginrei moved much as Sesshomaru had a few scant ours previously, soundlessly. She ascended the stairs and moved through the hallway to the large bedroom in the back with its attached balcony. The door was shut but Ginrei could hear and smell the human woman and the hanyou child just beyond the flimsy barrier.

"Lady Rin?" she called.

There was a sound as the floorboards shifted and blankets moved, and then: "Yes?" the voice was sturdy, calm.

"May I come in?"

"Yes."

Ginrei slid open the door and stared inside for a moment in confusion. Rin was sitting at the edge of her futon. It was made up neatly, but not stored away. Sesshomaru's futon had long since been hidden away, taken out of the room altogether. There was a small desk directly in front of Rin, an inkwell had been set up, the ink had been ground and mixed. Rin was well dressed, wearing a black kimono that had clouds in dark blue and white. Saya was sleeping soundly at the head of the futon.

As Ginrei stepped slowly into the room, Rin set aside the brush she'd been holding and shuffled the paper that lied on the desk in front of her. It was of poor quality, a gray-brown color, but it would hold the ink nonetheless. Ginrei spotted a few ink stains on Rin's fingertips, as well as a few globs of it that were starting to show through the other layers of the paper.

"Lady Rin." Ginrei sat on the floor across from Rin and made a small bowing motion, showing her respect, trying very hard not to upset the other woman in case there was, as she suspected, something large and profound troubling Rin. Something about Sesshomaru's actions that early morning when he'd left so silently, had convinced Ginrei that something was amiss. "Are you coming down to eat breakfast?"

Rin didn't meet her probing gaze. She shook her head. "No, I'm not hungry."

Ginrei dropped lower, trying to find Rin's eyes, trying to read her face playfully. "Are you sure? It's good meat today."

Rin gave her one short, curt nod. "I'm not coming down, Ginrei."

With the darkness to her tone, Ginrei saw that Rin's mood had at last broken down somewhat. She could press forward without seeming to bring the subject up with no provocation. "You're upset, my lady."

"I don't know what you're talking about. Go away." Rin muttered, irritably flicking one fingernail through the stack of paper. The fingertip was stained with the rich black ink.

"Lord Sesshomaru visited you last night before he left." Ginrei announced and couldn't withhold the smile from her lips when Rin immediately lifted her head, her earthy brown eyes flashing with alarm. "He visited me too. He was acting very strange."

"What is the matter with you?" Rin snarled suddenly. Her face made a sneering motion, exposing her teeth like an animal while her eyes at once clouded with tears. She blinked them away ferociously.

"Lord Sesshomaru tried to tell me that he would make Hanone his heir."

Rin stared at her blankly, taken aback. "What? H-Hanone?"

Ginrei nodded. "I couldn't see any reason why he would do it. He has always made his desire to have a son as his heir clear to me. He looked down on the female ruler Lady Taikokajin. It would make no sense for him to go back on his word to me, unless something even more precious to him was at stake." Ginrei paused, pinning Rin with her silvered eyes. "Something like his mate."

"Hanone is his heir?" Rin asked, whispering the words.

Ginrei's smile fell before she could stop it. Cautiously she shook her head. "No, I…I told him that he must have a son." She faltered when she saw Rin's face twist with anger briefly, and then Ginrei continued in a higher, plaintive voice, as if about to start begging. "Please understand Lady Rin. Hanone was to be _my_ child. Lord Sesshomaru and I had always agreed on that. If she had been a boy…I never would hold her the moment she could eat solid food. Lord Sesshomaru would take the child from me so that he could raise it—with _you…"_

Rin had allowed her attention to drift away from Ginrei as if she weren't listening at all, but when Ginrei finished her sentence, making her point, Rin jerked her head back to her, narrowing her eyes as the realization dawned. Ginrei's decision made perfect sense and it was hard to fault her for it. Rin could imagine Sesshomaru behaving in such a way, so selfishly. He would take over raising his heir, uncaring of what Ginrei wanted. Hanone was a child that would stay with Ginrei all her life because Sesshomaru made no huge claim on her.

Slowly, Rin sighed. "I understand." She pursed her lips and looked away. "And Hanone would never really satisfy him anyway."

"No, his request made no sense to me either, my lady."

Rin was silent for a time, staring off into nothingness. After a few moments Saya stirred, stretching and squeaking hungrily. Rin moved over to her daughter and scooped the baby up, cuddling her close, smelling her skin. Ginrei watched her, seeing clearly that the tenderness of the moment had a dual meaning. Not just the natural love between mother and child, but also a sort of mourning, a dim acceptance…as she nuzzled Saya she was thinking, _I will always have you…_

Ginrei bowed. "I would be honored, Lady Rin, if you would join Jaken and I for breakfast or lunch if you should feel like it, but I will leave you now. Hanone is alone—with Jaken."

Rin lifted her head and offered a small but genuine smile to the other woman. Her eyes glistened a little too much, but she was fast blinking them away. "Yes, you'd better get down there!"

Smiling, Ginrei rose to her feet and slipped soundlessly from the room, leaving Rin alone with her cooing, gurgling baby. Rin waited for the sound of the sliding door on its track, clattering shut, and then she scooted back toward the desk with its gray-brown paper and the ink brush, drying steadily in its inkwell. She opened her robes and adjusted Saya, letting the baby take one nipple in her mouth to nurse. The baby did so eagerly, trying to knead her mother's sides with her tiny clawed hands. She was barely two months old—if that—and she could support herself against her mother's body while she nursed. Rin stroked her child's hair wonderingly for a moment and then, slowly, turned her attention back to the bad paper and the ink.

She shifted the papers, bringing up the letter she had started to write. The characters had smeared, making the letter mostly unreadable. The characters at the top of the page, written first, were still discernible, they read: _Sesshomaru…_

Rin glanced over the rest of the page and then, making a face, she crumpled it and dropped it in its wadded ball onto the floor beside the little desk and her futon. She lifted her eyes and stared at the door to the balcony, listening as the autumn wind outside rattled it. _"I will return."_

"When?" Rin asked the wind at the door, closing her eyes and letting her body sag forward tiredly. It would be good to sleep when the nighttime came. Good to slip into the unknowingness and forgetfulness of unconsciousness. But then the prickle of her daughters claws on her breast made Rin look back down. Saya was watching her with her golden eyes wide and keen, but innocent as well.

Lovingly, Rin combed back Saya's little tuft of white hair, exposing her daughter's human ears. "Sesshomaru thinks you're his," Rin whispered, pressing her lips to her daughter's forehead, "but you'll always be mine, won't you? You'd never leave me like he did…"

Saya gurgled and cooed softly, squeezing her eyes shut as she languished in her mother's affection and loving touch. She was as good as Sesshomaru's lookalike, but the future was still open for her, wide open, as blank as the pages sitting before Rin on the desk, waiting for ink to be spread out, to tell a story.

* * *

Miles away, as the sun rose high, reaching its peak a little sooner than midday—the days were growing increasingly shorter as winter approached—the sunlight failed to pierce through the darkest spots in the forest. A surprising spot of whiteness stood out beneath the trees in this ancient mountain forest. It was a white inuyoukai lord, leaning his long, slender body wrapped in its luxurious robes, against the long, broad stretch of a tree trunk.

A sound came through the silent woods, a short, stiff grunting sound. Sesshomaru moved slightly, turning his head imperceptibly to investigate it. A mangy, gray dog appeared in the distance. If it stopped moving, slinking through the trees, it would fall invisible. Sesshomaru knew at once that it was not a dog, it was an inuyoukai. It was too big to be a normal dog or wolf anyway. It was the size of a horse, ducking below the lowest tree branches, crushing some of the smaller saplings below its massive paws.

Sesshomaru shifted, moving away from the tree he was leaning on. He faced the other creature directly now, his face stony.

The dog halted some distance away and its tongue lolled out. Its teeth were old, stained, and chipped. The look on its face and in its eyes was one of a hard, joyless smirk.

"Daken." Sesshomaru addressed the dog in a deep, distant voice.

The animal lowered its head, its ears flattened. It dropped its head to the ground but left its back end and tail high. It was bowing very clumsily, making a fool of itself, showing off. When it spoke, its voice was the thick, growling voice of an animal. "Sesshomaru."

The dog rose to its proper stance once more and closed its eyes concentrating. In a moment the creature was smaller, the size of a real dog. It wagged its tail and shifted its weight on its front paws. "Where to, my lord?"

"North." Sesshomaru answered. He turned and began to walk in that direction, passing silently through the forest, like a white ghost. Ferns and small saplings seemed to tip out of his way, or perhaps Sesshomaru passed clear through them. He was ghostly, ethereal…

The dog trotted after him, charging ahead. Unlike Sesshomaru, it smashed into saplings and ferns, knocking them violently out of the way. He ran with a doggy smile plastered over his face, and his pink tongue lolling.

The pine trees, looming, dark, and aromatic, were ringed by ancient layers of shed pine needles. They were bright orange and brown, making up the dense layer of decaying underbrush. A few of the deciduous trees in between were splashed with color, astoundingly bright after the darkness of the unchanging, immortal pines. Dead leaves crunched beneath Daken's feet, and barely whispered under Sesshomaru's.

The seasons would change, coming and going, but the pine trees refused to show it. Stoically, they carried snow on their branches, like shrouds of white, or clouds that they had captured and brought down to earth. Yet the loneliness and barrenness of winter was never fully revealed on them. Sesshomaru walked over the earth as one of those pines, unchanging, unaffected. But inwardly, he was vibrantly colored, splashed and painted with enraged reds, melancholy yellows, and hopeless, lost browns.

The landscape changed and withered as if in a dream, as if Sesshomaru could control and speed the passage of time. The leaves fell, knocked to the ground by vicious, chilly windstorms that brought icy rain. The first snows fell, tentative and painfully beautiful. Daken lapped at them with irritation, though in his true form he never stopped wearing a smile. When they came upon a stream or tiny brook in the mountains, Daken broke it apart with his nose, leaving marks of buffed whiteness like scars on the edge of his snout. They didn't leave the forest unless absolutely forced to do so. The mountains rose and fell around them.

At night, Sesshomaru lagged behind, listless, drawn into looking up at the stars. Except for their turning, they were unchanging. Like the ancient pine trees. Like himself. They were cold and beautiful, unfathomable even to an inuyoukai as powerful as he. They offered little comfort.

A bird cooed one wintry morning and Sesshomaru spotted it inside the dark branches of a pine tree. The bird shook and cheeped merrily. It was almost spring, the bird was looking forward to mating season, to the warmth of a mate and a nest and the eggs that the parents would shelter into the world. The bird was so lively, active, warm and alive…so different from the pine tree that it roosted on. It was even different from Daken, walking steadily ahead of Sesshomaru. It would live but a few turns of the seasons, it would live fast and hard while the pine tree continued on, slumbering through life and outlasting the tiny bird.

But the bird could take wing and flee, it could change, it could fight for its tiny speck of life, the scrap of time it was allowed on this world. The pine tree was firm and unyielding. One day time would win against it, and if time did not take it then humans or a destructive youkai could pass through this section of the woods and tear the pine tree to splinters. The pine tree, for all of its long life, could not get up and leave, it could not fight for its life…

As the bird called out again and then, unnerved at Sesshomaru's intense gaze, took flight, fluttering out of sight into the snowy forest, Sesshomaru found his thoughts turning vividly to Rin and Saya..

Daken made a small noise ahead, a doglike noise. "My lord?"

Wordlessly, Sesshomaru turned away from the pine and forced the thoughts of his mate and child from his mind. He began walking again, slowly but surely, into the oblivion of winter.

* * *

A/N: That was it!! It's over!! There will be an epilogue and probably another story too: _Return._ More info as I come up with it!! 


	34. Epilogue: Family

A/N: My semester is almost over, about a week left. I'm restless; I can barely get myself to do anything. A couple of my projects are hovering over my head, looming like big monsters. I've had trouble sleeping most of this week. And writer's block, yes, that is unpleasant. And at this moment I am fighting a cold, have been since right after Thanksgiving. I hate my roommate, all she does is watch soaps and sit around and not brush her teeth. She disgusts me. And generally emotion and unhappiness (or extreme happiness) wreaks havoc on my writing frequency. That's my excuse, lame I know. I have a better, more personal one involving my boyfriend but…not going into that. :-) Oh one thing I will go into…EXCELLENT piece of art to go along with last chapter specifically! It can be found here http:// shirei. Swear-that-you-are-mine-69962389 Just take out the I've put in. That excellent work of art was created by Shirei. THANK YOU SHIREI:-)

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or Sesshomaru.

* * *

Last Chapter: Shimofuri may be married to Arasoizuki's widow and may be forced to adopt his son. He has vowed to punish Sesshomaru for his wrongs, somehow. Sesshomaru and Rin fought and Sess agreed to leave Rin at Naishougoto with Ginrei. He left after briefly trying to declare Hanone his heir so that he could annul his marriage and please Rin, but Ginrei insisted that Hanone was _her_ child, and Sesshomaru would take their son, not Hanone. Sesshomaru met with Daken and journeyed without purpose. 

NOTE: this chapter starts off weirdly with Shimofuri, but give it time, it gets much better…and btw my weirdness has purpose…

* * *

**Epilogue: Family**

Delegates from high in the north arrived late in the evening in the Nanka province of the Middle Lands. Shimofuri met with them, dressed richly and ceremonially in his gray-blue robes. Tsukiyume dressed in russet-orange, like the sunset, and flanked him in the room, silently observing the room with her keen, brownish eyes. Directly at Shimofuri's side was his uncle, Sasugainu, also dressed to impress. The three of them constituted all that was left of the ruling class of inuyoukai that had once presided over the Middle Lands.

Nishiyori's entire clan had vanished, and Arasoizuki had been killed as well.

It was the spring after Sesshomaru had arranged peace treaties in the Middle Lands, and with the new season of birth, renewal, and life, there was also the same resentment, betrayal, and death.

Shimofuri despised his uncle and within him a deep rooted rage had started for Sesshomaru and his boundless power. He was pinned between his cowardly uncle and Sesshomaru's watchful eye. Saugainu was his elder and, though his uncle was not the supreme ruler of the Middle Lands, Shimofuri was expected to defer slightly to the older, more experienced leader. He broiled beneath the surface but expressed it to no one, not even to his younger sister. He sheltered Tsukiyume, for her own good, to protect her from the political intrigues. She was smart enough that she probably perceived much of it on her own, but Shimofuri did his best to keep her obscure. She was the one creature that mattered to him, the only bit of his family that remained for him to be proud of and to cherish.

The delegates were guards and escorts from the north. Arasoizuki's widow, named Yamome was their charge. In their court she sat in the center, bowing with all of the other delegates. Her son, Arasoizuki's only remaining heir now after Sesshomaru had destroyed his castle, was tucked away safely in the north. The son might never come to join his mother in the Middle Lands, even if Shimofuri and Yamome were married, as was the plan. He had been taken in by his mother's clan, secreted away. Until he was old enough to rule, chances were they wouldn't relinquish him.

The discussions began. Shimofuri, although he was the reigning ruler, spoke little during the meeting. He watched Yamome, wondering if he could marry her or not. He was very young, the youngest inuyoukai in all of the room. Yamome was older than him, but her scent was appealing and even dressed in black for her mourning she was fair, perhaps even beautiful.

The clan in the north was fair-haired and blue or green eyed. The delegates all looked alike and spoke with the same slight accent. Yamome herself didn't speak throughout; her opinion in the affair would scarcely matter. As a widow she had virtually no rights. If her clan felt it was proper, they could order her to commit suicide. Yet, in this case, they kept her around. Shimofuri thought he saw intelligence in her eyes, though she tried to keep her gaze always downcast and hidden.

The delegates retired for the night, spiriting away Yamome with them. Alone in the audience room with just family, Sasugainu grinned openly at his nephew. "Lady Yamome is a superior bitch. That rat Arasoizuki snagged a fine wife."

Shimofuri felt his jaw clench, but he said nothing. By all rights Yamome should still have been Arasoizuki's fine catch of a wife. She shouldn't have been forced to sit in her mourning robes, facing a young, almost juvenile ruler that was poised to replace her husband. In the whispered legends of Sesshomaru's attack on Arasoizuki and his castle, Shimofuri had heard that Yamome had crawled out of the burning wreckage, carrying her only surviving son in her arms. The other child died alone in the fire, caught sleeping when the attack came. If her surviving son had been any bigger, if she hadn't been holding him when the castle fell around her, it seemed impossible that either of her sons would've survived.

"You are silent, Nephew. You disagree?" Sasugainu probed, searching over Shimofuri's face carefully.

Tiredly, Shimofuri sighed. "I had not given any thought to a marriage. This hardly seems like my idea. What does it benefit me?"

"You keep Arasoizuki's land." Sasugainu replied, sharply. "And it _is_ in your interests. She isn't related to you. The clan is huge in the north. You need to be married and it's a fine alliance."

"I'm too young." Shimofuri murmured absently. His blue-gray eyes unfocused and stared off into the distance beyond Sasugainu.

"You are too young—too young to know what's good for you." Sasugainu snapped, growing irritable. "This is the arrangement that Lord Sesshomaru set up to appease them…"

"_He _should have been the one to pay something for it."

"_You_ aren't being _punished_," Sasugainu snarled, "No one is being punished! This is a _good match!"_

With his lips pinched tightly, Shimofuri gave a curt nod. "Yes, Uncle."

"I'd marry her if I didn't have one bitch already! Hah!"

Shimofuri's expression did not change. "Yes, Uncle."

Sasugainu cocked his head, becoming eager, almost belligerent, "Then you'll agree to the marriage? You'll marry Lady Yamome?"

Shimofuri fought the desire to snarl at his uncle by rising to his feet stiffly. "I will give it some thought. There is still time for me to consider the match before I make my final decision, is there not?"

Snorting, Sasugainu waved his hand at Shimofuri dismissively. As Shimofuri walked past him, Sasugainu turned and glanced at Tsukiyume. "You know, your brother is mad to stall. It could insult our guests."

Though the words were clearly meant to draw a reaction out of him, Shimofuri pretended as if his uncle had said nothing. He passed out of the audience room and retreated swiftly to his chambers. The maids waited there, young human men, bowed and ready to help him undress. Shimofuri dismissed them with a gesture and they hurried away, scurrying out the door and closing it behind them.

Alone, Shimofuri stripped out of his heavy ceremonial robes until only the lighter, under robe was left behind. He tossed the delicate, silky garments aside and left them at the foot of his futon, uncaringly. The servants would deal with that later.

He cracked the window, allowing the chilled, spring air to rush in. It was rich with the smells of reproduction. Trees were starting to unfurl their leaves and their blossoms. Birds were arriving from wherever they had migrated to in the winter. Animals were emerging out of hibernation. Even fungus, bacteria, and other microbial life forms were springing up out of the dirt, coming alive after their winter dormancy.

Normally, a whiff of the outside world would steady Shimofuri, letting him feel the awakening inside his own young, powerful body. He was just entering the prime of his life as an inuyoukai, though he was already a few hundred years old. Sesshomaru and Sasugainu were older than Shimofuri by leaps and bounds; even Lady Yamome could be twice his age. Scenting spring on the wind should've made Shimofuri feel powerful and young; it should've also calmed him, clearing his mind of the bitterness and rage that burned inside him.

But it didn't.

Instead the spring air seemed to wrap him in fatigue, heavy and dense as fog. Shimofuri shook his head, rolled his eyes, and snorted like an animal, trying to clear his nostrils. Stepping back from the window he settled onto his futon and closed his eyes. Almost at once he was asleep, transported to an entirely different world through his dreams.

He found himself sitting on dewy grass, beside a marsh that was rich to all of his senses. The scents were of plant decomposition, marsh gases and lily pads. It was a scent that most humans wouldn't want to linger around, but to Shimofuri it was not entirely repulsive. It was nighttime, but when Shimofuri craned his neck, he spotted the pink of sunrise or sunset, he couldn't be sure of which. The pond water was in motion, full of ripples, as if some invisible child were continually tossing small pebbles into it. In reality that motion was created by fish and insects, landing on the surface. The frogs were peeping, croaking, calling for their mates. Calling for sex. It was a beautiful, almost unearthly sound.

A deep woman's voice rose up behind him, startling Shimofuri into turning around hastily and taking up a defensive stance immediately. The woman was small, almost childlike. When Shimofuri saw her he dropped his stance at once. He realized that when she'd spoken he hadn't understood her. Cautiously, he asked, "I'm sorry…?"

She smiled and began to step forward. Shimofuri was at last able to see her clearly as she neared. She had pinkish hair that fell in a cascade around her. Her face was young, gentle, and round. She was quite short, not quite reaching to Shimofuri's chest. Had Rin stood at this woman's side, she would have dwarfed the pink-haired stranger.

"Shimofuri." The woman spoke again with her deep voice. It was odd, mismatched with her body, so young and childlike. Shimofuri resisted the urge to scowl at the strangeness.

"Yes?" he was beginning to suspect that this was no ordinary dream. He eyed the woman as she approached with open suspicion.

"I have a proposition for you." The small woman smiled, subtly. Her eyes were a rich brown, reminding Shimofuri abruptly of Rin's eyes…he looked away, back toward the pond with its endless, unexplained ripples.

"Speak, whatever you are." It was a dream vision. He had been summoned by this being, whatever she—it—was. He would only be released from the dream when he had heard her out and given her an answer, or promised to give it thought. His uncle's face flashed before his mind's eye. Why was everyone pushing him into making decisions that he didn't want to make?

The small woman gave a small, chirp-like laugh, reminiscent of a bird. "You are a sad anomaly, Lord Shimofuri." The woman dropped to her knees a few feet from him and to his side. Shimofuri watched her covertly from the corner of one eye. She reached out with a slender, pale arm, dipping her fingers into the water. When she lifted them, the water dribbled away, silvered and full of light. The droplets met the darkness of the water and swirled, becoming little minnow-like fish. They swam away, rippling the water.

"You are a water nymph?" Shimofuri asked, sharply.

She smiled widely but didn't lift her eyes to him. Instead she moved her hand over to the dewy grass and smoothed it over with her palm. Tiny frogs squeezed out from underneath her touch, wriggling in the grass and then hopping away energetically, croaking and calling for love. "I am _not_ a silly nymph." She glanced up at him and Shimofuri saw that her eyes weren't just _close_ to looking like Rin's—it _was_ Rin's eyes, her gaze. The small woman's face changed, gently, and she became Rin, though she was still too pale and too small to pass for the other woman exactly.

Unnerved, Shimofuri jerked his eyes away, blinking.

The woman laughed. "I am sometimes called Koeru—but for you, Lord Shimofuri, I will be called Jishin."

"You're a goddess."

Her smile was Rin's own, worn on Rin's face, but the eyes were no longer accurate, they were too dark now, almost black like obsidian, and her hair was still pink like cherry blossoms. "I am the giver of life. It was I that touched your mother's womb to create you, young one."

Shimofuri ignored her. "What do you want with me?" _And why do you look like Lady Rin?_

"You have a problem. There is an imbalance of power." Her voice grew darker. "You know of whom I speak."

Shimofuri turned his back on her, warily. He glanced at the sky and saw that it had grown darker since he'd last looked at it—and now the stars were spinning. It was not a wild spinning, but Shimofuri could see their progress, the constellations whirling and changing. Abruptly he felt a surge of nausea and looked away, closing his eyes.

The goddess, Jishin, continued speaking. "Do not marry Lady Yamome."

With his eyes still closed, Shimofuri asked, "Why not?"

"Because she will not help you correct the imbalance—but if you take my advice and turn her away, I will give you power."

Stiffly, Shimofuri asked, "And what do I have to do for you," he pronounced her name carefully in a growl, "Jishin?"

"For now you must only turn Lady Yamome away." Jishin's voice came close behind him, whispering. "Send her back to the north. I will visit you again when you do."

"How will you bring me power over Sesshomaru?" Shimofuri whirled around to face Jishin but found himself alone on the dewy grass at the edge of the pond. The frogs cheeped and croaked, continuing their song uninterrupted by the creatures speaking so close by.

Snarling to himself, Shimofuri turned around several times, searching for the goddess. There was no sign of her. He glanced up on impulse and saw that the blackness of the night sky was awash in white light, the stars were circling wildly in an insane, sickening light show. Wincing and choking, Shimofuri covered his eyes and crouched down low, stumbling…

He woke on his futon then, gasping. His eyes still stung from the light, though his room was dark around him. His skin was hot and clammy. To his alarm, he discovered that he hadn't undressed at all. The rich, ceremonial clothes that he was _certain_ he'd left at the foot of his futon were no longer present; instead they were still wrapped around him, hardly loosened at all. When he craned his neck and glanced to the window, he saw that it was still tightly shut. The room was stuffy, the air thick…

_A vision._ Why would she look like Rin? Jishin's gaze haunted him as he rose from his futon and moved toward the door. He wouldn't marry Lady Yamome. He hadn't wanted to in the first place. It would be a relief for him to deny her and send her home. His uncle wouldn't be happy, and the clan in the north would likely be outraged and offended, but Shimofuri had already made up his mind. He would do what Jishin had instructed, but not because he believed or trusted her promise of power.

He hadn't wanted to marry Lady Yamome anyway. Jishin had nothing to do with his decision. None at all…

* * *

(Back in time a few months from Shimofuri's encounter…) 

As the months passed, Rin first entered depression. Every morning and every night were spent writing feverishly, but none of the letters were sent. Rin tore them apart, burned them, or hid the letters, rather than sending them. Sometimes she dressed and ate with Jaken, Ginrei, and on occasion the general Oushi that Sesshomaru had left to watch over Ginrei and Rin. Other times she stayed hidden away in her room, staring into nothing, listening to Saya's tiny, whispering breath.

Once, while Saya slept soundly in the night, Rin left her futon and stepped out onto the balcony in the cold. It was the dead of winter, snow was heavy and still on the ground, crusted there from wind and temperature changes. It was the ugliest time of winter, when the scenery and the weather were unchanged. The days and nights were the same, bitterly cold even without a wind. The whole world seemed full of stillness, waiting in vain for the spring and the thaw. For the return to life and rain, or just for snowfall.

Rin stepped out into that icebox, closing the door behind her to keep it from disturbing tiny, innocent Saya. Numb to the cold, she stood at the edge of the balcony and stared down at the snowed-in gardens around Naishougoto, and at the ice over the lake. If she leapt from the second story, would the impact be great enough to crack the ice and take her under into the ugly, dirty black water? That extreme chill, and with the ice over top of her, it would kill her without question…

Barefoot, Rin lifted one leg into the air, over the edge of the balcony. It was an awkward, clumsy position and she teetered, thrown off balance. The thrill of fear made her step back and bump into the closed sliding door. She blinked wildly and drew in deep breaths. With each exhale her breath fogged out around her mouth thickly. It was fascinating to watch, and strangely beautiful. She imagined that breath not coming, ceasing completely. She held her breath and observed the emptiness of the night air without her breath…

And she thought of beautiful Saya, sleeping snugly in the futon. Without her mother's body heat, the baby could begin to get cold before morning. Rin thought of Inuyasha: tough, harsh, and determined, but also vulnerable. She didn't dare leave her child. She was hanyou, she would need every advantage that she could get.

Puffing out her long-held breath, Rin fought the desire to cry, blinking back her tears. How selfish had she been to consider death? _My life is not my own…_she belonged to Saya now.

New strength filled Rin then and she began to recover, emerging more and more from her room. Occasionally she sat down to try and write a real letter to Sesshomaru, a request that he return to Naishougoto to see Saya, to see how his very first child had begun to sit up on her own and to crawl and even to walk…but the letters were never completed and Rin was never satisfied with them. They became personal journals instead, filled with Rin's thoughts and her observations, mainly centered on her daughter, Ginrei, and Hanone.

_The snow is wet and thick today, the weather is warming. I was sick to my stomach for a time, with a fever. I worried that Saya would catch it from me, but she has stayed healthy as always. It feels good to be healthy again. I ate soup earlier today, and it was probably the finest I've ever had._

_Saya is smaller than Hanone, I'm not certain why. It is odd because Saya is already walking while Hanone can barely crawl. I feel sad sometimes to see it because already she is growing so fast, soon I won't be able to hold her. She will want to walk everywhere. She will want to pretend she is a big girl. It's such a frightening thing, to worry about losing her. What if she falls into the lake? What if she falls from the balcony…?_

She often wondered about Sesshomaru, but almost as soon as she caught herself thinking or remembering her mate, Rin pushed him out of her mind. The old pain would rise within her and ache for a time until she managed to forget it completely, focusing on her daughter, or on Ginrei or Hanone or even Jaken and Oushi.

The months passed and gradually, Rin was able to forget that such a massive part of her life had vanished, disappearing into the wilderness more than a two seasons ago. There was no word of when he would return and Rin eventually was able to go to sleep at night without wondering if she would be wakened in the night by his presence. She refused to cry when each morning and each night had passed and he had not yet reappeared.

Messages came from Shimofuri off and on throughout the wintertime. Oushi told her this usually in the mornings while everyone was present together, but the news was always spoken directly to her. Oushi set Rin on edge. The inuyoukai was very loyal to Sesshomaru, but she felt that his eyes were predatory, watching her like a hawk, waiting for her to make a mistake. She wondered if he passed on messages to Sesshomaru, updating him on how things were…what would he say about her? _She does not miss you. She is interested when I tell her that Shimofuri has sent a message, but she never asks to see it…_

It was true, she never responded when he told her there were messages for her. Partly it was because she didn't believe him—it was unlike Shimofuri to be so foolish to send a blind message to Naishougoto. Did he even know where Rin was located? Rin hadn't written to him, though sometimes she considered it, bitterly.

She stood by her promise to Sesshomaru, stubbornly.

One winter morning when Oushi informed Rin that there was a message, Ginrei spoke up, asking, "May I see it?"

Oushi, standing in the doorway of the tearoom, blinked back at her stupidly. When he spoke it was stammered. "The message is addressed to Lady Rin."

"Oh." Ginrei sighed as if this news dampened her spirits. Yet, even as she playacted this response, Ginrei's silvered eyes slid toward Rin keenly and her lips smiled faintly. "That's too bad. You know that Lord Shimofuri is a distant cousin of mine, I believe." Her face twisted up slightly with remembered pain, "He represented my _deceased_ family at my marriage." The word _deceased_ was synonymous with _murdered_ inside Ginrei's sentence.

Her words made Rin frown and look away embarrassedly. She was mated to the creature responsible for Ginrei's loss. Oushi cleared his throat awkwardly and left the room, disappearing from the palace for the rest of the day. If he joined them for breakfasts in the morning he no longer reported phony messages from Shimofuri to test Rin's loyalty.

* * *

The snows had completely melted when Sesshomaru appeared mysteriously, returning unannounced to Naishougoto. It was evening when he arrived. 

Ginrei was out in the gardens, bundled up carefully in heavy, warm kimono robes to ward off the remaining springtime chill. It was embroidered with blossoming flowers, whites, pinks, reds, and yellows. Hanone, still barely in the crawling stages, was picking at the newly sprouted grasses, gurgling contentedly. When she tried to eat the strands she plucked from time to time, Ginrei pulled them away from her daughter, making Hanone fuss and wrinkle her face.

A chilly wind picked up through the trees, rustling their leaves. The gardeners had been working day and night to clear the dead leaves that had been hidden beneath the snow all winter. They were planting flowers at one end of the garden now, alongside a hedge. Ginrei could smell their rich, fertile pollen when she inhaled. It was pleasing, even intoxicating…

As if in agreement with her mother, Hanone dropped her handful of grass and sneezed loudly. Snot blew out of her nose and she clawed at it with her fingertips, whimpering with confusion and frustration.

Ginrei knelt to help Hanone with her mucus mess, but paused in mid motion when the wind brought her another very different scent. It was a scent that Ginrei picked up every day inside both Hanone and Saya.

She stood up and turned around, searching the garden.

Over one of the hills, Ginrei spotted something white, moving at the far end of the garden, coming slowly, leisurely toward her. Tense, in spite of herself, Ginrei knelt and scooped up Hanone, holding her daughter close, almost possessively. She waited, watching as the white figure drew closer and closer. Hanone squirmed in her arms, cooing in a way that Ginrei had never heard before. It was an instinctual call that the young child made to illicit attention from her father. She knew him just as Ginrei did by scent. She knew him by blood and instinct that was buried eons deep.

Sesshomaru came within ten feet of Ginrei and his full-blooded daughter and stopped. He met Ginrei's eyes with his own hawk-like gold once and then let his gaze slide away, as if bored. "Ginrei. You are well?"

"Yes I am, Lord Sesshomaru." Holding Hanone tightly, Ginrei bowed. "Welcome back to Naishougoto, Husband." As she stood erect again, cautiously, Ginrei tried to search his face, to understand his return. "Is…May I ask a question, my lord?"

"You may." Sesshomaru responded, dully.

With a quick glance at the area around them, searching for Rin, Ginrei spoke. "Has the time come that my husband expects another child? His heir?"

The question apparently startled the usually untouchable Sesshomaru. He stared at her for a time without speaking. Then: "You are not yet fertile."

It was true, Ginrei had not begun to bleed properly again since Hanone's birth. She was still nursing her daughter, though that action wasn't necessary. False milk could be produced and turned out for Hanone to drink. She wouldn't like the switch, but she would grow accustomed to it. If Ginrei stopped nursing her daughter she would quickly become fertile once more, and she and Sesshomaru could work on conceiving the next child, hopefully a boy, a proper heir.

Ginrei ducked into another bow and didn't speak. Hanone squealed and squirmed, reaching out her tiny but fat fists at her father. Her fingertips were delicately clawed.

Sesshomaru's gaze lingered on his daughter for a moment, his attention caught. "She has grown."

Ginrei's answer was stiff. "Yes…"

His golden gaze narrowed at last on Ginrei, taking note of her change in tone. Her head was still bowed, but Sesshomaru didn't need to see her face to know that she was feeling possessive. Hanone was _her_ child; her posture screamed that she felt threatened. She was stiff, though she tried to hide it. She was eager for Sesshomaru to make his intentions clear, or simply leave.

Under his scrutiny, Ginrei flinched and took a step backward. "Lady Rin awaits you, I am certain."

Wordlessly, Sesshomaru glided by her, heading for the palace. When he was beyond her at last, Ginrei dropped onto the grass and nuzzled Hanone's cheeks and neck, breathing in her baby's rich, milky scent. Hanone fought her, whimpering, watching the strange male that she instinctively knew to be her father as he vanished, moving elegantly, almost flowing over the bridge that crossed the lake to Naishougoto, perched as it was in the center of the lake.

Ginrei covered her daughter's eyes and forced one finger into her mouth, letting the frustrated child become distracted with suckling on it. "Forget him, baby." She whispered, closing her eyes and letting her long, silvered hair fall around them both like a curtain, "Forget about him."

* * *

Sesshomaru met Oushi the moment he stepped into the palace. His general stood at attention, stiffly, and dropped into a nervous bow. "Lord Sesshomaru…" 

"Sit up." Sesshomaru ordered, curtly. He surveyed the halls around he and Oushi briefly, sniffed at the gentle airflow of the palace, seeking Rin's scent. If she was close by, she would've heard Oushi's stiff greeting. How would she react? Would she come out to greet him as a proper, loving mate? Was the iciness between them still strong and unyielding? Ginrei had seemed to indicate that Rin was truly still at the palace, and Oushi hadn't sent any word to reveal otherwise…

"Where is Rin?"

"In the tearoom, my lord." Oushi answered.

Sesshomaru slipped past Oushi without any further comment. It was possible that Rin had heard Oushi's voice from the tearoom, yet there was no sign of activity from down the hall. She was either ignoring him or she'd simply missed Oushi's voice. He stomped forward, eager to find out.

As he reached the sliding door that lead to the tearoom, Sesshomaru paused for a second, hearing Jaken's high, whiny voice rising from within. _That_ would be why Rin hadn't heard Oushi announcing his arrival.

"Rin!" Jaken huffed loudly, "You must let her do it for herself! Let the child chew it! It will harden her palate!"

A child cried out in a strangled, growling sound that might've been a halfway formed word. The scent of seasonings hit Sesshomaru's nose, as well as a clean smell of vegetables. It was springtime and Saya was old enough to try eating solid foods. In the summer and fall she would get her first tastes of plums, cherries, and other sweet food treats. But for now she would be forced to contend with vegetables that had been preserved through the wintertime.

"Please Saya…" Rin begged her daughter, using a sweet, playful voice that forced a tingle to travel up and down Sesshomaru's spine. His fingers flicked reflexively against the sliding door, making a faint rasping sound. Although faint, this sound was enough to trigger Jaken's attention.

"Come in!" he shouted, impatiently. "Foolish maid…"

Sesshomaru slid the door open even as Jaken pushed himself away from his cushion and hobbled forward. His toadish eyes bugged outward with shock and his mouth fell open, gaping. He plastered himself to the floor. "Lord Sesshomaru! I was not expecting…"

But Sesshomaru ignored the toad and stepped over him, moving to the head of the small tea table. His golden eyes were set unwaveringly on Rin.

"My lord! We are honored! You have returned at last!" Jaken gushed, bowing repeatedly.

Without looking at Jaken, Sesshomaru ordered him to sit and the toad scurried back to his cushion immediately. The toad gestured wildly at Rin. "Pour Lord Sesshomaru some tea!"

Jaken was addressing Rin without a title, as if she were equal or lower in stature to him. Before Rin had a chance to make any movement to serve her mate tea or not, Sesshomaru focused a wrathful glare at the impish frog. "Jaken, you will address Rin as your superior."

"My lord!" the frog gasped, choking and stammering. He started to bow and apologize for his offence—for it was clear that he _had_ offended Sesshomaru, though Rin stared at the exchange blankly uncaring of how Jaken addressed her—only to bash his thick, round head against the table, jarring it. "Oh! Ow!" he shrieked.

Sesshomaru was anything but sympathetic. Staring straight ahead toward the center of the table where the tea was already chilled, he commanded Jaken to leave. The imp obeyed at once, mumbling apologies all the way out. He closed the door hurriedly once he passed through it, leaving Rin, Sesshomaru, and Saya alone together for the first time in many long months.

Without appearing to, Sesshomaru examined both Rin and Saya. Rin was leaner than he recalled, but she appeared stronger as well. Her kimono was of a lush, green waterfall with silvered waters. Her hair was carefully tucked away and black as ever, without the slightest hint of gray. She stared at the table, avoiding his gaze.

Saya, meanwhile, was staring openly at him. There was some sort of sauce smeared over her mouth and a bowl of finely chopped vegetables sitting before her. Saya was apparently capable of sitting upright for long periods of time without any aid from Rin. She grasped the table with only one hand while she stared at Sesshomaru with widened, golden eyes. When his gaze flicked to her, Saya broke out in a mostly toothless grin and clapped her tiny, clawed fists together.

Rin moved then, reaching for a cloth that was sitting to one side of Saya. It was already dirty and raggedy, smeared with old food from meals long gone. Rin wiped Saya's face though the baby resisted, squirming and slapping at Rin's hands. On the rare moment that the rag slipped beyond her mouth, Saya started to openly protest in half-formed words.

"Naaaaah! Nah Mah!!"

Almost embarrassedly, Rin stopped cleaning Saya's face and dropped her hands into her lap, still clutching the dirtied rag. Her shoulders rose and fell in a silent, tense sigh. Saya clapped her hands happily again, unaware of the adult tension flowing thickly in the little tearoom.

Abruptly, Sesshomaru spoke. "I have brought you a gift."

Rin blinked and almost lifted her head, almost looked at him directly. "Lord Sesshomaru?"

Without further explanation, Sesshomaru reached to his belt and tugged on the sash that secured his swords to his waist. It slipped loose easily and Sesshomaru pulled one sword away from his other two. Lifting it, he placed it slowly on the tea table before Rin. It was a small, short blade, similar in its outward appearance to the one she'd left with Inuyasha and his family, _Burikko._ It curved beautifully, and the hilt was silvered and shining with mother of pearl.

"It has been named _Shinjubo."_ Sesshomaru told her, quietly. "A youkai cannot wield it; the owner must possess some human within them."

Rin bowed. "Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru." She stayed ducked in her bow, blinking rapidly.

Sesshomaru could smell her tears, but pretended that he could not. "Saya has grown." He observed.

"Yes." Rin nodded, her head lowered, her face still hidden, but not enough to obscure the sparkle of the first tear that careened onto her cheeks. It rolled down swiftly and fell free into the air, landing directly beside _Shinjubo._ The sparkle of the tear reflected the closeness of the mother of pearl hilt—it was impossible to decide which was more beautiful.

Sesshomaru stared beyond Rin toward their daughter. "May I see her?"

"Yes." Rin murmured and shifted, turning her back on him to scoop Saya up into her arms. The baby accepted her mother's touch easily and snuggled in, pawing hopefully at Rin's kimono, hoping to get through them to nurse. She scooted closer, awkwardly on her cushion to pass Saya onto her mate's lap. Saya fought her mother slightly, but then turned her golden eyes onto her father and froze, completely enthralled.

Sesshomaru gradually lifted his arm, accepting his firstborn daughter into his lap. His powerful arm, the indestructible claws, now wrapped around the fragile, innocent baby girl. As he looked down at her, Saya reached upward and snatched his hair, but even as she tugged on it viciously, trying to get a strand of it into her mouth, Sesshomaru's expression remained calm and soft, as if he didn't register pain or discomfort at all.

She was already aging much faster than Hanone was; her humanity pushed her ahead, urging on speed. Even though she was still nursing often from Rin, Rin's human body had already become fertile again; Sesshomaru could smell the change in her hormones. Fertility overlaid with the milk-producing hormones. Humans were faster breeders, like rodents when compared to youkai. Unless all nursing was stopped, Ginrei comparatively would not become fertile again for years…

Saya gazed up at him and Sesshomaru found himself able to meet her hypnotic stare. The tension partly fled his body. She was like staring into a strange, warped mirror that shrunk his image and removed his sternness, his long years of perfecting his cold, heartless persona. The untouchable Sesshomaru. But Saya carried his face, his features, and she begged to be touched, to be loved. He knew without a doubt that this child would grow up to proclaim that she loved both her parents, fearlessly.

Sesshomaru had never spoken those three words—_I love you_—to either of his parents, ever that he could recall. Life was always about strictness, power, and competing with his father's huge, unassailable image…

Without realizing what he was doing, Sesshomaru brushed his fingertips over Saya's skin, letting his terrible claws rasp over her innocent, vulnerable flesh, but so lightly that the baby gurgled and opened her mouth widely, uttering half-formed words happily. She used both her hands to snatch his fingers and bit down on his palm, gumming it, tasting him.

A small sound from Rin made him glance up. She was staring at him, her chin quivering violently and silent tears rolled unstoppably down her cheeks, before rounding her chin and dribbling away, falling onto the dirty rag she was clasping in her lap.

"Rin…" his voice came out a sad, weak croak.

"Welcome back." She said, nodding slightly, and then turned her head away, hiding her tears.

* * *

The balcony doors stood open, letting the wet, heavy, and chilled breeze sweep into the room. Rin sat with Saya in her lap, wrapped in the furs on her futon. She stared out through her brown eyes at her mate, standing on the balcony, facing out toward the lake, into the wind. Saya chattered in her lap incoherently, whining in her own baby's language about the wind and the cold. 

Rin said nothing. Since holding Saya and giving her the sword _Shinjubo,_ Sesshomaru had said little to her. It continued to startle her to see him physically present, right inside the same room with her. She'd dreamed his presence many times, but always awoken with only Saya. Now she struggled to stay awake and watch him through the dimming light as the sun set.

What was on his mind? What was on her mind? She couldn't deny that she had missed him, and that seeing him again filled her with joy. But why had he returned? Was it for Ginrei? Was it just to see Saya? Was it just to give her the sword?

The wind pushed at his long, white hair, making him seem more like a ghost than like a living creature. Rin stared at it, trying to gather the courage to speak to him frankly.

"Sesshomaru." She didn't bother using a title; it would grab his attention all the more that way. He turned slightly, revealing the perfect, beautiful profile of his face. Rin plunged ahead. "Why did you come back?"

"I said that I would." He replied, coolly.

Rin shifted, frowning. The first bit of tension and distrust, long buried and repressed, began to flow back into her. She pushed it away. "I am…happy to see you."

His voice was cold. "You did not write."

She shot back an answer immediately. "Neither did you." Inside her heart had taken off, pounding frantically. If only he knew the truth. She had written, _all the time._ But the letters didn't appear on the surface to be addressed to him, and yet they were. She knew that, had always known that. Rather than risk talking about her bitterness and hurt, and her fear of the next time he would go to Ginrei, of the pain it caused her to actually _like_ Ginrei and yet despise her as the _second woman,_ she wrote about the weather, of Jaken's healing leg bone, of Saya's steady growth. Anything but her emotions, of missing him. And she had never mentioned Sesshomaru within the letters _because they were for him_ though she would never have admitted that to herself while writing them.

Sesshomaru faced the wind again. "I thought often of you."

Rin swallowed thickly, fighting a sudden burst of nausea. _If I thought of you I would've felt nothing but despair…I could not allow myself to think of you, it was too painful. _

Her silence was his only answer. It dragged onward, yawning like the mouth of a whale. Swallowing them whole.

Sesshomaru took a step further out into the balcony, the motion completely hid any view that Rin might've been afforded of his face otherwise. Fear gripped her and forced her to break her silence. "You will stay tonight?"

"There is unrest in the north…"

Rin shifted violently, almost dislodging Saya from her lap. "You just _came_ from the north!" she shouted, her voice thick with pain. "Please…"

"You wish me to stay?" the words were quiet, almost hesitant.

Rin paused, nervous abruptly. Slowly she nodded, though Sesshomaru had his back to her and would never see the motion. "Yes. I want you to stay." Unbidden, tears swarmed her eyes again and Rin growled in frustration, lifting one hand to flick them away, but more of them just kept coming.

Sesshomaru moved as she worked, trying to clear her face of them. He crossed the room swiftly and knelt at her side. She found herself blinking through her tears, frowning at them, sniffling like a child, and staring directly into Sesshomaru's warm, amber eyes. They were open, clear of any reserve, reminding her intensely of her daughter's gaze. She searched his face and found that her stomach tightened, fluttering in a pleasant way that she thought was no longer possible for her to feel.

Saya babbled in her baby language, clapped her hands. Both her parents failed to hear it.

Slowly, Sesshomaru reached out his hand, touching his fingers to Rin's cheek, feeling the moisture of her salty tears. His lips were partly opened, and they quivered once, half-forming words like Saya's. But then he closed them and withdrew. The persona of distance and cold passed over his features slightly again. "I will take Hanone as my heir…" he announced, quietly.

Though her heart was pounding frantically, Rin shook her head. "You can't do that, Ginrei loves her so much, and if she was your heir…"

Sesshomaru's face was stern. "You know there must be another heir if I do not choose Hanone."

Rin drew a breath to speak, to grant him permission for the carnal act that would create the heir he needed, but the breath was weak and shaky. It was stilted and sounded more as if she were choking. At last, she forced out, "I understand."

A fleeting frown crossed his face. He opened his mouth, "I am…sorry…"

"Promise me that it won't be for a long time." Rin stumbled over the words, pushing them out swiftly. "You have time…" _I don't. _

Sesshomaru nodded once. "Very well."

Saya pawed at him from between the furs, like a cat, catching Sesshomaru's attention. One golden eye peeked through a crack and then darted back. She giggled mischievously.

Rin watched as Sesshomaru peeled away the furs covering Rin and Saya on one side, tossing it away partly. Saya blinked at him, wide eyed, startled. Her mouth fell open in a silent "O" shape. Sesshomaru ducked closer and ran his fingers lightly over her skin, tickling her. Saya squealed and rolled away, crawling deeper into the furs of the futon. She screeched out, "Maaaah!"

As he sat up, seemingly regaining his dignity, Sesshomaru met Rin's brown eyes again, caught the sparkle of her unshed tears and the glimmer of her small smile. His expression softened and abruptly he pressed close to her, pressing his lips to the warmth of her neck, taking in her scent. Rin laid her forehead onto his shoulder, letting her tears escape and fall, soaking into his robes. "Thank you…" she whispered, giving into her body's shaking.

Sesshomaru wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her closer to him. He closed his eyes tightly against her, allowing his emotions to sweep over him completely for the first time in long years and perhaps for the first time in the presence of another. Scowling fiercely, fighting with himself, he wrenched his lips into moving, but barely any air passed through them. "I…love you."

It didn't seem possible that she would hear him with her feeble human ears, but she did nevertheless. She choked against him, almost sounding as if she would vomit or start coughing, but instead fresh tears started, a whole rush of them, a flash flood. She broke into sobs, her shoulders shaking. Sesshomaru held her close and kept his eyes closed, forcing away the rest of the world and delving deep inside himself.

The bird chirping in the pine tree in the dead of winter. His father, bleeding on the beach on the night of his death. Rin's blood on the sheets when she'd gone into labor. The fierceness and desperation in Inuyasha's golden eyes when he'd held his brother's young son pinned to his armor…

Heat prickled his eyes but Sesshomaru ignored it and focused instead on Rin's warmth, on her tears, on her love for him. For all that he had professed to despising humanity; it was only inside humanity that the hottest passions burned. Fate could not be ignored or denied. Humanity touched every aspect of Sesshomaru's life, haunting him like a ghost. For all of his power he was nothing, nothing without the weak, frail human woman that was crying in his arms.

As Saya whimpered and crawled between them, into her mother's lap again, looking for attention, the bizarre little family became one.

* * *

WOWIE! Phew! That was a lot of work. I am exhausted. Seriously. I've been exhausted a lot lately. You know what, I'm just getting old. 21 and old already. Ugh. Okay, **Return** potential basic synopsis which may be subject to minor or evcen major change:

**Return:** _After accepting a bargain she just couldn't resist, Rin discovers the price she has to pay is unthinkable when an earthquake swallows Saya and Hanone whole. Hanone finds herself a hostage in Shimofuri's castle. Saya wakens in a human village where she will discover the cruel reality of being a half-breed, of having one foot lodged in both worlds... _


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